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Mirror Mirror on the Wall | Charlotte Jean | TEDxLytteltonWomen


welcome everyone I feel like I need to

welcome everyone I feel like I need to have a whole general assembly here

have a whole general assembly here

have a whole general assembly here because we’ve got one wonderful woman

because we’ve got one wonderful woman

because we’ve got one wonderful woman and wonderful topics and I’m breathing

and wonderful topics and I’m breathing

and wonderful topics and I’m breathing and I’m not dead it’s fantastic so

and I’m not dead it’s fantastic so

and I’m not dead it’s fantastic so you’ve got little mirrors under your

you’ve got little mirrors under your

you’ve got little mirrors under your seats if you have a look I think their

seats if you have a look I think their

seats if you have a look I think their face down and then I do a little

face down and then I do a little

face down and then I do a little experiment okay there’s such pretty

experiment okay there’s such pretty

experiment okay there’s such pretty mirrors they remind me of Princess

mirrors they remind me of Princess

mirrors they remind me of Princess mirrors and not evil stepmother Prince

mirrors and not evil stepmother Prince

mirrors and not evil stepmother Prince it mirrors yeah we don’t like those okay

it mirrors yeah we don’t like those okay

it mirrors yeah we don’t like those okay Oh wonderful all right so we’re going to

Oh wonderful all right so we’re going to

Oh wonderful all right so we’re going to do a little experiment now most of us

do a little experiment now most of us

do a little experiment now most of us today came with beautiful here make up

today came with beautiful here make up

today came with beautiful here make up clothes i’m looking at a really gorgeous

clothes i’m looking at a really gorgeous

clothes i’m looking at a really gorgeous audience right now but let’s just

audience right now but let’s just

audience right now but let’s just pretend that we didn’t put any makeup on

pretend that we didn’t put any makeup on

pretend that we didn’t put any makeup on just pretend now we may have a look at

just pretend now we may have a look at

just pretend now we may have a look at this little mirror and it’s your friend

this little mirror and it’s your friend

this little mirror and it’s your friend but honestly look at it and tell me the

but honestly look at it and tell me the

but honestly look at it and tell me the first things that come to your mind okay

first things that come to your mind okay

first things that come to your mind okay we’re in a safe place for all ladies oh

we’re in a safe place for all ladies oh

we’re in a safe place for all ladies oh sorry I’m very sorry we’re not all

sorry I’m very sorry we’re not all

sorry I’m very sorry we’re not all ladies but we all love ladies

ladies but we all love ladies

ladies but we all love ladies oh I was blinded by the light sorry

oh I was blinded by the light sorry

oh I was blinded by the light sorry sorry okay but you can do this too it’ll

sorry okay but you can do this too it’ll

sorry okay but you can do this too it’ll be interesting okay so if you need to

be interesting okay so if you need to

be interesting okay so if you need to share please pass them around ok now we

share please pass them around ok now we

share please pass them around ok now we did this in another setting and based on

did this in another setting and based on

did this in another setting and based on research we know that when you look in

research we know that when you look in

research we know that when you look in the mirror it okay let’s be honest what

the mirror it okay let’s be honest what

the mirror it okay let’s be honest what do we see first generally the things we

do we see first generally the things we

do we see first generally the things we want to change all the things we have a

great grandfather and his nose that has

great grandfather and his nose that has come down through the generations you

come down through the generations you

come down through the generations you know we we see things that we’ve had to

know we we see things that we’ve had to

know we we see things that we’ve had to make peace with we see scars from

make peace with we see scars from

make peace with we see scars from accidents but we don’t see the beauty

accidents but we don’t see the beauty

accidents but we don’t see the beauty first eight out of ten women don’t see

first eight out of ten women don’t see

first eight out of ten women don’t see the beauty first and that makes me

the beauty first and that makes me

the beauty first and that makes me really angry I look quite kind right now

really angry I look quite kind right now

really angry I look quite kind right now honest because I’m nervous but actually

honest because I’m nervous but actually

honest because I’m nervous but actually deep inside I’m really angry and I’ll

deep inside I’m really angry and I’ll

deep inside I’m really angry and I’ll get some of that soon and it’s this

get some of that soon and it’s this

get some of that soon and it’s this whole sense of why when women have

whole sense of why when women have

whole sense of why when women have accomplished so much in education in

accomplished so much in education in

accomplished so much in education in science and social justice is this still

science and social justice is this still

science and social justice is this still the measuring stick because it is we

the measuring stick because it is we

the measuring stick because it is we can’t get away from it so let me give

can’t get away from it so let me give

can’t get away from it so let me give you some stats just to prove my

you some stats just to prove my

you some stats just to prove my credibility alright so the first set i

credibility alright so the first set i

credibility alright so the first set i just mentioned eight out of ten of every

just mentioned eight out of ten of every

just mentioned eight out of ten of every woman on happy with their appearance

woman on happy with their appearance

woman on happy with their appearance okay that was taken in 2016 so these are

okay that was taken in 2016 so these are

okay that was taken in 2016 so these are quite new next time on average women

quite new next time on average women

quite new next time on average women spend more on beauty than on education

spend more on beauty than on education

spend more on beauty than on education wow I mean that got my attention okay

wow I mean that got my attention okay

wow I mean that got my attention okay supermodel suffer with substance abuse

supermodel suffer with substance abuse

supermodel suffer with substance abuse addictions and low self-esteem more than

addictions and low self-esteem more than

addictions and low self-esteem more than their peers who aren’t on the rent geeky

their peers who aren’t on the rent geeky

their peers who aren’t on the rent geeky Heidi did you guys see this engine

Heidi did you guys see this engine

Heidi did you guys see this engine and knees were removed recently just

and knees were removed recently just

and knees were removed recently just just removed no trauma was just a post

just removed no trauma was just a post

just removed no trauma was just a post photoshopping accident and it was

photoshopping accident and it was

photoshopping accident and it was showing how far Photoshop has gone in

showing how far Photoshop has gone in

showing how far Photoshop has gone in distorting reality okay woman’s

distorting reality okay woman’s

distorting reality okay woman’s conversation center on appearance weight

conversation center on appearance weight

conversation center on appearance weight loss and desirability even when they’re

loss and desirability even when they’re

loss and desirability even when they’re 80 okay I mean gosh I think something

80 okay I mean gosh I think something

80 okay I mean gosh I think something should change but at that age it’s still

should change but at that age it’s still

should change but at that age it’s still coming up okay retama villages can be

coming up okay retama villages can be

coming up okay retama villages can be scary all right and the next one the

scary all right and the next one the

scary all right and the next one the Cuba mass media phenomenon all right now

Cuba mass media phenomenon all right now

Cuba mass media phenomenon all right now I didn’t know this and i falled to

I didn’t know this and i falled to

I didn’t know this and i falled to ignorance because i thought i read the

ignorance because i thought i read the

ignorance because i thought i read the newspaper but apparently cuba doesn’t

newspaper but apparently cuba doesn’t

newspaper but apparently cuba doesn’t allow mass media in their in their

allow mass media in their in their

allow mass media in their in their country which on the one side is

country which on the one side is

country which on the one side is obviously not highly positive because

obviously not highly positive because

obviously not highly positive because you’re breaking your connection from the

you’re breaking your connection from the

you’re breaking your connection from the global world from conversations that are

global world from conversations that are

global world from conversations that are happening interestingly enough women in

happening interestingly enough women in

happening interestingly enough women in their country what is their self-worth

their country what is their self-worth

their country what is their self-worth like very high they are powerful women

like very high they are powerful women

like very high they are powerful women they start businesses their run

they start businesses their run

they start businesses their run companies they raise children and they

companies they raise children and they

companies they raise children and they do that without the constant pressure of

do that without the constant pressure of

do that without the constant pressure of measuring up to an image that they keep

measuring up to an image that they keep

measuring up to an image that they keep seeing and I found that interesting all

seeing and I found that interesting all

seeing and I found that interesting all right so let’s have a look at the

right so let’s have a look at the

right so let’s have a look at the dictionary this is another very

dictionary this is another very

dictionary this is another very interesting thing so can you see the to

interesting thing so can you see the to

interesting thing so can you see the to date differences there it is 1924 on

date differences there it is 1924 on

date differences there it is 1924 on this 2016 my max is rather bad but I

this 2016 my max is rather bad but I

this 2016 my max is rather bad but I know that’s just under a hundred years

know that’s just under a hundred years

know that’s just under a hundred years right it’s like 90-something anyone got

right it’s like 90-something anyone got

right it’s like 90-something anyone got good maths okay so that’s close to a

good maths okay so that’s close to a

good maths okay so that’s close to a century changes the taken place in

century changes the taken place in

century changes the taken place in society and our thinking look at the

society and our thinking look at the

society and our thinking look at the definition so beauties are combinational

definition so beauties are combinational

definition so beauties are combinational qualities that delight the senses of the

qualities that delight the senses of the

qualities that delight the senses of the person or thing possessing this

person or thing possessing this

person or thing possessing this interesting first delights the possessor

interesting first delights the possessor

interesting first delights the possessor 2016 beauty is pleasing to the sense or

2016 beauty is pleasing to the sense or

2016 beauty is pleasing to the sense or mind aesthetically that implies

mind aesthetically that implies

mind aesthetically that implies excellence finest blessedness so to be

excellence finest blessedness so to be

excellence finest blessedness so to be beautiful is to be beautiful which means

beautiful is to be beautiful which means

beautiful is to be beautiful which means to be blessed if you look at those two

to be blessed if you look at those two

to be blessed if you look at those two definitions there’s a common truth that

definitions there’s a common truth that

definitions there’s a common truth that comes out at least to me

comes out at least to me

comes out at least to me that it’s a combination of qualities

that it’s a combination of qualities

that it’s a combination of qualities that delight or please combination of

that delight or please combination of

that delight or please combination of qualities okay so he has my little

qualities okay so he has my little

qualities okay so he has my little childhood picture and don’t life of it

childhood picture and don’t life of it

childhood picture and don’t life of it because you know I’m being vulnerable

because you know I’m being vulnerable

because you know I’m being vulnerable here so there is me when I was very

here so there is me when I was very

here so there is me when I was very small that does not mean the 22 because

small that does not mean the 22 because

small that does not mean the 22 because I did ballet for about three months and

I did ballet for about three months and

I did ballet for about three months and my parents could not find a photo and me

my parents could not find a photo and me

my parents could not find a photo and me and the 22 at the same time the camera

and the 22 at the same time the camera

and the 22 at the same time the camera and the tutor didn’t go together now

and the tutor didn’t go together now

and the tutor didn’t go together now when I was growing up and this is the

when I was growing up and this is the

when I was growing up and this is the reason why I’m so passionate about this

reason why I’m so passionate about this

reason why I’m so passionate about this it’s because it really really hurt me

it’s because it really really hurt me

it’s because it really really hurt me often we passionate about the things

often we passionate about the things

often we passionate about the things where there’s been pain and we’ve had to

where there’s been pain and we’ve had to

where there’s been pain and we’ve had to work through those and I just I loved

work through those and I just I loved

work through those and I just I loved ballet but I had terrible balance so i

ballet but I had terrible balance so i

ballet but I had terrible balance so i couldn’t even be the tree in the

couldn’t even be the tree in the

couldn’t even be the tree in the pantomime you know so the tree must just

pantomime you know so the tree must just

pantomime you know so the tree must just like stand i would kind of be the

like stand i would kind of be the

like stand i would kind of be the leeming tree and then sort of come back

leeming tree and then sort of come back

leeming tree and then sort of come back to you know waiver the position was and

to you know waiver the position was and

to you know waiver the position was and other little girls in the ballet class

other little girls in the ballet class

other little girls in the ballet class were beautiful they had those little

were beautiful they had those little

were beautiful they had those little bands you know certain here can go into

bands you know certain here can go into

bands you know certain here can go into abandoned certain here can’t some way he

abandoned certain here can’t some way he

abandoned certain here can’t some way he would never go into a bun I couldn’t be

would never go into a bun I couldn’t be

would never go into a bun I couldn’t be a tree and when I came home and did my

a tree and when I came home and did my

a tree and when I came home and did my law whatever it was for my dad to watch

law whatever it was for my dad to watch

law whatever it was for my dad to watch he was reading the newspaper and I asked

he was reading the newspaper and I asked

he was reading the newspaper and I asked him daddy daddy watch me you know I was

him daddy daddy watch me you know I was

him daddy daddy watch me you know I was obviously just think very important you

obviously just think very important you

obviously just think very important you know and he didn’t and when I was

know and he didn’t and when I was

know and he didn’t and when I was finished in my little pantomime waiting

finished in my little pantomime waiting

finished in my little pantomime waiting for some kind of you know I don’t know

for some kind of you know I don’t know

for some kind of you know I don’t know yeah look that was nice you know I don’t

yeah look that was nice you know I don’t

yeah look that was nice you know I don’t know something my dad said to me go and

know something my dad said to me go and

know something my dad said to me go and change into your play clothes loves life

change into your play clothes loves life

change into your play clothes loves life but these are what paper so it was this

but these are what paper so it was this

but these are what paper so it was this whole message okay no that’s not for you

whole message okay no that’s not for you

whole message okay no that’s not for you la vie that’s really not for you in fact

la vie that’s really not for you in fact

la vie that’s really not for you in fact no lovey just that’s not for you and

no lovey just that’s not for you and

no lovey just that’s not for you and over the years this constant battle got

over the years this constant battle got

over the years this constant battle got reinforced so my sister was the pretty

reinforced so my sister was the pretty

reinforced so my sister was the pretty one I was a clever one okay i think the

one I was a clever one okay i think the

one I was a clever one okay i think the roles are reversed now but that’s how it

roles are reversed now but that’s how it

roles are reversed now but that’s how it was then and the irony is that we look

was then and the irony is that we look

was then and the irony is that we look almost identical

almost identical

almost identical so you look at pictures off as you like

so you look at pictures off as you like

so you look at pictures off as you like how could they have said that and then

how could they have said that and then

how could they have said that and then teachers cottoned on and they would

teachers cottoned on and they would

teachers cottoned on and they would always talk about me being studious and

always talk about me being studious and

always talk about me being studious and hardworking but I was never pretty and I

hardworking but I was never pretty and I

hardworking but I was never pretty and I was never captivating and it was

was never captivating and it was

was never captivating and it was something that just got spoken over me I

something that just got spoken over me I

something that just got spoken over me I didn’t even question it I was like oh

didn’t even question it I was like oh

didn’t even question it I was like oh well that’s it then at the age of four I

well that’s it then at the age of four I

well that’s it then at the age of four I was a deep child I used to think about

was a deep child I used to think about

was a deep child I used to think about everything very deeply I fell in love

everything very deeply I fell in love

everything very deeply I fell in love with Japanese ladies and storybooks okay

with Japanese ladies and storybooks okay

with Japanese ladies and storybooks okay I wanted to be a Japanese princess with

I wanted to be a Japanese princess with

I wanted to be a Japanese princess with the is it a kimono always want to call

the is it a kimono always want to call

the is it a kimono always want to call it a Kawasaki or I give the name wrong

it a Kawasaki or I give the name wrong

it a Kawasaki or I give the name wrong but you know that long lovely ok and

but you know that long lovely ok and

but you know that long lovely ok and then thank you and and their way they

then thank you and and their way they

then thank you and and their way they put their ear and those lovely pins and

put their ear and those lovely pins and

put their ear and those lovely pins and it was just these beautiful woman that

it was just these beautiful woman that

it was just these beautiful woman that looked like princesses and fairy tales

looked like princesses and fairy tales

looked like princesses and fairy tales and that’s what I wanted to be okay i

and that’s what I wanted to be okay i

and that’s what I wanted to be okay i mean i was a early developer but in my

mean i was a early developer but in my

mean i was a early developer but in my brain that’s what I wants to be an

brain that’s what I wants to be an

brain that’s what I wants to be an informed this ideal so all-fire goes to

informed this ideal so all-fire goes to

informed this ideal so all-fire goes to sorry wrong side off I go to Korea 20

sorry wrong side off I go to Korea 20

sorry wrong side off I go to Korea 20 years later all the robots I’m not going

years later all the robots I’m not going

years later all the robots I’m not going to give my edge away and I’m meet katie

to give my edge away and I’m meet katie

to give my edge away and I’m meet katie and katie lee looks just like that lady

and katie lee looks just like that lady

and katie lee looks just like that lady okay so for the first one minute i can’t

okay so for the first one minute i can’t

okay so for the first one minute i can’t speak and I’m like I’m just you know

speak and I’m like I’m just you know

speak and I’m like I’m just you know enjoying her and then I realized she

enjoying her and then I realized she

enjoying her and then I realized she actually wants to have a conversation

actually wants to have a conversation

actually wants to have a conversation with me and then she wants to be my

with me and then she wants to be my

with me and then she wants to be my friend I mean he’s older shocking you

friend I mean he’s older shocking you

friend I mean he’s older shocking you know revelations really like my ideal

know revelations really like my ideal

know revelations really like my ideal wants to talk to me that wants to be my

wants to talk to me that wants to be my

wants to talk to me that wants to be my friend and six months later I’m sitting

friend and six months later I’m sitting

friend and six months later I’m sitting in a coffee shop and the Koreans work

in a coffee shop and the Koreans work

in a coffee shop and the Koreans work really hard I worked three jobs so to

really hard I worked three jobs so to

really hard I worked three jobs so to have coffee with the Korean as lack it’s

have coffee with the Korean as lack it’s

have coffee with the Korean as lack it’s a miracle so I’m sitting there and katie

a miracle so I’m sitting there and katie

a miracle so I’m sitting there and katie says to me do you know that when I met

says to me do you know that when I met

says to me do you know that when I met you I was very shy and scared and I said

you I was very shy and scared and I said

you I was very shy and scared and I said oh why was i’m waiting for the hmm

oh why was i’m waiting for the hmm

oh why was i’m waiting for the hmm something durable it’s gonna be revealed

something durable it’s gonna be revealed

something durable it’s gonna be revealed she said because you are so beautiful I

she said because you are so beautiful I

she said because you are so beautiful I didn’t know how to speak to you what are

didn’t know how to speak to you what are

didn’t know how to speak to you what are you doing that moment

you doing that moment

you doing that moment so our prompt you start crying wonderful

so our prompt you start crying wonderful

so our prompt you start crying wonderful Korean coffee shop you know white

Korean coffee shop you know white

Korean coffee shop you know white english teacher crying and tell who but

english teacher crying and tell who but

english teacher crying and tell who but the same thing happened to me you are my

the same thing happened to me you are my

the same thing happened to me you are my ideal so we both China cry and Pat each

ideal so we both China cry and Pat each

ideal so we both China cry and Pat each other on the back and say how did this

other on the back and say how did this

other on the back and say how did this happen you know and that just made me

happen you know and that just made me

happen you know and that just made me realize like that thing that concept of

realize like that thing that concept of

realize like that thing that concept of beauty is formed over time so in a

beauty is formed over time so in a

beauty is formed over time so in a single instance where you given truth

single instance where you given truth

single instance where you given truth and you go oh that’s beauty it’s a

and you go oh that’s beauty it’s a

and you go oh that’s beauty it’s a series of events in your life that form

series of events in your life that form

series of events in your life that form the mirror inside not the mirror on the

the mirror inside not the mirror on the

the mirror inside not the mirror on the outside okay I was really deep thank you

outside okay I was really deep thank you

outside okay I was really deep thank you for listening alright so the qualities

for listening alright so the qualities

for listening alright so the qualities of beauties then I had to get to this

of beauties then I had to get to this

of beauties then I had to get to this place I wind why is this so important

place I wind why is this so important

place I wind why is this so important okay so I did work very hard at school I

okay so I did work very hard at school I

okay so I did work very hard at school I even did offer constipating that tells

even did offer constipating that tells

even did offer constipating that tells you something don’t do it anymore and

you something don’t do it anymore and

you something don’t do it anymore and and yeah I did everything I could so I

and yeah I did everything I could so I

and yeah I did everything I could so I basically decided I’m not pretty but I’m

basically decided I’m not pretty but I’m

basically decided I’m not pretty but I’m going to be clever I’m going to be

going to be clever I’m going to be

going to be clever I’m going to be strong okay so a granny did mistake me

strong okay so a granny did mistake me

strong okay so a granny did mistake me for a boy when I was about 16 which

for a boy when I was about 16 which

for a boy when I was about 16 which tells you how much time I spent in the

tells you how much time I spent in the

tells you how much time I spent in the gym beautiful beautiful wonderful at a

gym beautiful beautiful wonderful at a

gym beautiful beautiful wonderful at a wonderful adolescence and treatment for

wonderful adolescence and treatment for

wonderful adolescence and treatment for that so we went through this whole

that so we went through this whole

that so we went through this whole process of not been able to get rid of

process of not been able to get rid of

process of not been able to get rid of the beauty thing and I figured out years

the beauty thing and I figured out years

the beauty thing and I figured out years later wine this is why look at this that

later wine this is why look at this that

later wine this is why look at this that is a human heart please still enjoy your

is a human heart please still enjoy your

is a human heart please still enjoy your lunch so beauty is essential to life

lunch so beauty is essential to life

lunch so beauty is essential to life nature is primarily beautiful not

nature is primarily beautiful not

nature is primarily beautiful not primarily functional if it was primarily

primarily functional if it was primarily

primarily functional if it was primarily functional a waterfall would just be a

functional a waterfall would just be a

functional a waterfall would just be a spout that like went from some way into

spout that like went from some way into

spout that like went from some way into a hole in the ground everything is

a hole in the ground everything is

a hole in the ground everything is designed with the intention to be

designed with the intention to be

designed with the intention to be beautiful so administers to us Beauty

beautiful so administers to us Beauty

beautiful so administers to us Beauty heels soldiers in World War 1 in World

heels soldiers in World War 1 in World

heels soldiers in World War 1 in World War two when they went through all those

War two when they went through all those

War two when they went through all those terrible things they didn’t the doctors

terrible things they didn’t the doctors

terrible things they didn’t the doctors don’t know how to fix them because of

don’t know how to fix them because of

don’t know how to fix them because of all of the

all of the

all of the weapons they used to take him out to the

weapons they used to take him out to the

weapons they used to take him out to the countryside to a beautiful house with

countryside to a beautiful house with

countryside to a beautiful house with water and plants and they would heal

water and plants and they would heal

water and plants and they would heal their they wouldn’t heal in hospital but

their they wouldn’t heal in hospital but

their they wouldn’t heal in hospital but the finest doctors and the finest

the finest doctors and the finest

the finest doctors and the finest medicine available Beauty opens hearts

medicine available Beauty opens hearts

medicine available Beauty opens hearts when you have had a really bad day and

when you have had a really bad day and

when you have had a really bad day and you get home and you can just sit in

you get home and you can just sit in

you get home and you can just sit in your God and I hope you all have a

your God and I hope you all have a

your God and I hope you all have a garden or dis the pot plant or something

garden or dis the pot plant or something

garden or dis the pot plant or something and you get out of that space can you

and you get out of that space can you

and you get out of that space can you feel something happens inside well you

feel something happens inside well you

feel something happens inside well you shouldn’t do that in your in your heart

shouldn’t do that in your in your heart

shouldn’t do that in your in your heart there’s an opening and there’s a

there’s an opening and there’s a

there’s an opening and there’s a restoration of that phrase all is well

restoration of that phrase all is well

restoration of that phrase all is well with the world when you in I call it

with the world when you in I call it

with the world when you in I call it God’s picnic and nature’s all around you

God’s picnic and nature’s all around you

God’s picnic and nature’s all around you somehow something is restored no I

somehow something is restored no I

somehow something is restored no I needed to say anything i needed to

needed to say anything i needed to

needed to say anything i needed to cancel you maybe your bank balance still

cancel you maybe your bank balance still

cancel you maybe your bank balance still what it is but peace has been restored

what it is but peace has been restored

what it is but peace has been restored bc gives life beauty comforts we send

bc gives life beauty comforts we send

bc gives life beauty comforts we send flowers to people in morning why do we

flowers to people in morning why do we

flowers to people in morning why do we do that they’ve just lost one of the

do that they’ve just lost one of the

do that they’ve just lost one of the most important people in their lives but

most important people in their lives but

most important people in their lives but we send them flowers okay so my old

we send them flowers okay so my old

we send them flowers okay so my old Atticus challenge so very real quickly

Atticus challenge so very real quickly

Atticus challenge so very real quickly the reason why beauty became such a big

the reason why beauty became such a big

the reason why beauty became such a big thing for me was because in 2007 I

thing for me was because in 2007 I

thing for me was because in 2007 I developed an autoimmune disorder and my

developed an autoimmune disorder and my

developed an autoimmune disorder and my organ started shutting down so just

organ started shutting down so just

organ started shutting down so just first my liver then it was my hot

first my liver then it was my hot

first my liver then it was my hot cartilage then it was my Harper hydro

cartilage then it was my Harper hydro

cartilage then it was my Harper hydro system so i couldn’t keep water in and

system so i couldn’t keep water in and

system so i couldn’t keep water in and then my hair fell out and they didn’t

then my hair fell out and they didn’t

then my hair fell out and they didn’t know if I had cancer if yeah I was

know if I had cancer if yeah I was

know if I had cancer if yeah I was basically an experiment I went from one

basically an experiment I went from one

basically an experiment I went from one specialist to another and I developed an

specialist to another and I developed an

specialist to another and I developed an allergy to make up I mean can you

allergy to make up I mean can you

allergy to make up I mean can you mentioned I’m battling this okay and I

mentioned I’m battling this okay and I

mentioned I’m battling this okay and I also can’t wear makeup so hilarious

also can’t wear makeup so hilarious

also can’t wear makeup so hilarious berlioz I can lawful it now not then and

berlioz I can lawful it now not then and

berlioz I can lawful it now not then and so I had to spend a year on experimental

so I had to spend a year on experimental

so I had to spend a year on experimental treatment not knowing if I was going to

treatment not knowing if I was going to

treatment not knowing if I was going to make it or not and not able to wear

make it or not and not able to wear

make it or not and not able to wear makeup and that was the first time I

makeup and that was the first time I

makeup and that was the first time I looked in the mirror and saw me because

looked in the mirror and saw me because

looked in the mirror and saw me because now I didn’t have

now I didn’t have

now I didn’t have all the things that I was putting on and

all the things that I was putting on and

all the things that I was putting on and that process of seeing me started a

that process of seeing me started a

that process of seeing me started a shift in my mind and I started first of

shift in my mind and I started first of

shift in my mind and I started first of all to like me because I got to know me

all to like me because I got to know me

all to like me because I got to know me in the mirror interesting then I started

in the mirror interesting then I started

in the mirror interesting then I started to notice the texture of my skin

to notice the texture of my skin

to notice the texture of my skin improving over the months because

improving over the months because

improving over the months because obviously with jaundice I looked like I

obviously with jaundice I looked like I

obviously with jaundice I looked like I was Chinese without the eyes you know so

was Chinese without the eyes you know so

was Chinese without the eyes you know so I mean it was just yellow every way so

I mean it was just yellow every way so

I mean it was just yellow every way so sense of humor helps but so the the

sense of humor helps but so the the

sense of humor helps but so the the whole issue there was I looked sick and

whole issue there was I looked sick and

whole issue there was I looked sick and as I became healthier my skin solid to

as I became healthier my skin solid to

as I became healthier my skin solid to heal and then I developed this amazing

heal and then I developed this amazing

heal and then I developed this amazing just a realization that those things

just a realization that those things

just a realization that those things hadn’t happened in child mulaqat this

hadn’t happened in child mulaqat this

hadn’t happened in child mulaqat this amazing quota so Margot me she writes

amazing quota so Margot me she writes

amazing quota so Margot me she writes for The Hunger studies have shown a

for The Hunger studies have shown a

for The Hunger studies have shown a woman who enjoyed close and loving

woman who enjoyed close and loving

woman who enjoyed close and loving relationships with their fathers which

relationships with their fathers which

relationships with their fathers which includes assurance enjoyment approval

includes assurance enjoyment approval

includes assurance enjoyment approval and childhood even if they are faking

and childhood even if they are faking

and childhood even if they are faking that you can dance suffer less from

that you can dance suffer less from

that you can dance suffer less from eating disorders depression and

eating disorders depression and

eating disorders depression and developed a strong sense of personal

developed a strong sense of personal

developed a strong sense of personal identity in positive self-esteem okay so

identity in positive self-esteem okay so

identity in positive self-esteem okay so the good news is that if you didn’t have

the good news is that if you didn’t have

the good news is that if you didn’t have a dad like that there still hope but we

a dad like that there still hope but we

a dad like that there still hope but we need to understand the link when it

need to understand the link when it

need to understand the link when it didn’t happen when you were growing up

didn’t happen when you were growing up

didn’t happen when you were growing up what happened in your psychology so and

what happened in your psychology so and

what happened in your psychology so and my life’s passion after I didn’t die i

my life’s passion after I didn’t die i

my life’s passion after I didn’t die i decidedly was very happy about being

decidedly was very happy about being

decidedly was very happy about being alive and I then decided that I wanted

alive and I then decided that I wanted

alive and I then decided that I wanted to help everyone else stay and be alive

to help everyone else stay and be alive

to help everyone else stay and be alive because it was like can you imagine you

because it was like can you imagine you

because it was like can you imagine you know everything in use change so I study

know everything in use change so I study

know everything in use change so I study clinical nutrition herbology exercise

clinical nutrition herbology exercise

clinical nutrition herbology exercise science okay overachiever gain but now I

science okay overachiever gain but now I

science okay overachiever gain but now I had something good to put it into and I

had something good to put it into and I

had something good to put it into and I started studying the skin and I really

started studying the skin and I really

started studying the skin and I really approached beauty as a scientist first

approached beauty as a scientist first

approached beauty as a scientist first so how can we get a skin to be beautiful

so how can we get a skin to be beautiful

so how can we get a skin to be beautiful because I used to love meeting the woman

because I used to love meeting the woman

because I used to love meeting the woman that weren’t wearing makeup but their

that weren’t wearing makeup but their

that weren’t wearing makeup but their skin was beautiful i just noticed things

skin was beautiful i just noticed things

skin was beautiful i just noticed things the color the tone the light in their

the color the tone the light in their

the color the tone the light in their eyes the brightness the

eyes the brightness the

eyes the brightness the but the character coming through and

but the character coming through and

but the character coming through and what I saw wasn’t facing the the beauty

what I saw wasn’t facing the the beauty

what I saw wasn’t facing the the beauty issue and the only way that I faced that

issue and the only way that I faced that

issue and the only way that I faced that was through other people because you

was through other people because you

was through other people because you cannot be beautiful in isolation so I

cannot be beautiful in isolation so I

cannot be beautiful in isolation so I had these clients who were very

had these clients who were very

had these clients who were very irritating and they would constantly ask

irritating and they would constantly ask

irritating and they would constantly ask me about how come your skin is so

me about how come your skin is so

me about how come your skin is so beautiful and I sets them no it’s not

beautiful and I sets them no it’s not

beautiful and I sets them no it’s not that it’s beautiful it’s very healthy

that it’s beautiful it’s very healthy

that it’s beautiful it’s very healthy and I can explain to you exactly why

and I can explain to you exactly why

and I can explain to you exactly why okay so i’ll put on the British teaching

okay so i’ll put on the British teaching

okay so i’ll put on the British teaching accent but that’s you know I didn’t want

accent but that’s you know I didn’t want

accent but that’s you know I didn’t want to talk about beauty I talked about

to talk about beauty I talked about

to talk about beauty I talked about antioxidants and phytochemicals the

antioxidants and phytochemicals the

antioxidants and phytochemicals the epidermal layer how to clear okay so I

epidermal layer how to clear okay so I

epidermal layer how to clear okay so I had that conversation but they wouldn’t

had that conversation but they wouldn’t

had that conversation but they wouldn’t let up they kept I’d meet strangers on

let up they kept I’d meet strangers on

let up they kept I’d meet strangers on the street that would pass me and say

the street that would pass me and say

the street that would pass me and say wow imagine feel beautiful okay I can’t

wow imagine feel beautiful okay I can’t

wow imagine feel beautiful okay I can’t do that X improperly but just complete

do that X improperly but just complete

do that X improperly but just complete strangers telling me that I’m beautiful

strangers telling me that I’m beautiful

strangers telling me that I’m beautiful and pushing this this message through

and pushing this this message through

and pushing this this message through that I wouldn’t get eventually I got it

that I wouldn’t get eventually I got it

that I wouldn’t get eventually I got it and I realized that the mirror inside

and I realized that the mirror inside

and I realized that the mirror inside had been healing all this time even

had been healing all this time even

had been healing all this time even though I hadn’t spoken about it I hadn’t

though I hadn’t spoken about it I hadn’t

though I hadn’t spoken about it I hadn’t seen it as a because my soul and my

seen it as a because my soul and my

seen it as a because my soul and my spirits had been healing as I began to

spirits had been healing as I began to

spirits had been healing as I began to heal and so all of the false mirrors had

heal and so all of the false mirrors had

heal and so all of the false mirrors had also started changing just like the work

also started changing just like the work

also started changing just like the work being done backstage and I didn’t know

being done backstage and I didn’t know

being done backstage and I didn’t know but it was being done and isn’t that

but it was being done and isn’t that

but it was being done and isn’t that lovely I thank the lord for good

lovely I thank the lord for good

lovely I thank the lord for good designer so there is the shattered image

designer so there is the shattered image

designer so there is the shattered image it’s sort of blurred you can’t see it

it’s sort of blurred you can’t see it

it’s sort of blurred you can’t see it and there’s restoration of the broken

and there’s restoration of the broken

and there’s restoration of the broken image it’s a miracle that I can look at

image it’s a miracle that I can look at

image it’s a miracle that I can look at that and not like run away screaming and

that and not like run away screaming and

that and not like run away screaming and that I think is a story for all of us

that I think is a story for all of us

that I think is a story for all of us beauty is in order to do it’s not an

beauty is in order to do it’s not an

beauty is in order to do it’s not an add-on it is laughing with a friend it’s

add-on it is laughing with a friend it’s

add-on it is laughing with a friend it’s high tea in the garden it is part of us

high tea in the garden it is part of us

high tea in the garden it is part of us and as a gift already given to you that

and as a gift already given to you that

and as a gift already given to you that you get to experience for the rest of

you get to experience for the rest of

you get to experience for the rest of your life I removed my mosque i

your life I removed my mosque i

your life I removed my mosque i renounced my agreements are fine

renounced my agreements are fine

renounced my agreements are fine tears are grieved I forgave I reshare

tears are grieved I forgave I reshare

tears are grieved I forgave I reshare beauty I wrote the answers I needed to

beauty I wrote the answers I needed to

beauty I wrote the answers I needed to hear ask God to give them to me my take

hear ask God to give them to me my take

hear ask God to give them to me my take home is delight in one of your features

home is delight in one of your features

home is delight in one of your features each day for 7 to 21 days with Beauty

each day for 7 to 21 days with Beauty

each day for 7 to 21 days with Beauty purpose thank you so much

”

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