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FOCUS: Figuring Out Consistent Unique Strengths | Donna Drake | TEDxHiltonHead


good morning hello everyone nice to be

good morning hello everyone nice to be here

here

here I am Donna Drake and this is an exciting

I am Donna Drake and this is an exciting

I am Donna Drake and this is an exciting moment for me to be able to be here

moment for me to be able to be here

moment for me to be able to be here talking to all of you I’ve always wanted

talking to all of you I’ve always wanted

talking to all of you I’ve always wanted to participate in a TED event a TEDx

to participate in a TED event a TEDx

to participate in a TED event a TEDx event so this is my first time so thank

event so this is my first time so thank

event so this is my first time so thank you so much for being here I appreciate

you so much for being here I appreciate

you so much for being here I appreciate you it’s so exciting so I grew up in st.

you it’s so exciting so I grew up in st.

you it’s so exciting so I grew up in st. Louis Missouri and growing up in st.

Louis Missouri and growing up in st.

Louis Missouri and growing up in st. Louis Missouri was interesting and I

Louis Missouri was interesting and I

Louis Missouri was interesting and I loved my Midwestern heritage but for

loved my Midwestern heritage but for

loved my Midwestern heritage but for some reason I was bullied when I was a

some reason I was bullied when I was a

some reason I was bullied when I was a kid and I decided that I wanted to grow

kid and I decided that I wanted to grow

kid and I decided that I wanted to grow up and be famous because I thought that

up and be famous because I thought that

up and be famous because I thought that if I became famous the kids that were

if I became famous the kids that were

if I became famous the kids that were bullying me we’re gonna be nicer to me

bullying me we’re gonna be nicer to me

bullying me we’re gonna be nicer to me that they’re gonna be I’ll be like oh

that they’re gonna be I’ll be like oh

that they’re gonna be I’ll be like oh they’re gonna wish that they were nicer

they’re gonna wish that they were nicer

they’re gonna wish that they were nicer to me because now I’m famous well it’s

to me because now I’m famous well it’s

to me because now I’m famous well it’s very funny because the children that I

very funny because the children that I

very funny because the children that I grew up with now are some of my closest

grew up with now are some of my closest

grew up with now are some of my closest friends and they support me and they’re

friends and they support me and they’re

friends and they support me and they’re like all we knew you’d grow up to do

like all we knew you’d grow up to do

like all we knew you’d grow up to do great things

great things

great things but today I’m going to be talking on

but today I’m going to be talking on

but today I’m going to be talking on figuring out your consistent unique

figuring out your consistent unique

figuring out your consistent unique strengths finding your it’s in life so

strengths finding your it’s in life so

strengths finding your it’s in life so like I said when I was in second grade I

like I said when I was in second grade I

like I said when I was in second grade I was getting bullied and my singing

was getting bullied and my singing

was getting bullied and my singing teacher mrs. Bing er said to me Donna

teacher mrs. Bing er said to me Donna

teacher mrs. Bing er said to me Donna you have an amazing singing voice and I

you have an amazing singing voice and I

you have an amazing singing voice and I said thank you and I put my hands on my

said thank you and I put my hands on my

said thank you and I put my hands on my hip and I said and I’m gonna be famous

hip and I said and I’m gonna be famous

hip and I said and I’m gonna be famous and she laughed and she says okay great

and she laughed and she says okay great

and she laughed and she says okay great good to know you know and as the years

good to know you know and as the years

good to know you know and as the years rolled by when I was in sixth grade I

rolled by when I was in sixth grade I

rolled by when I was in sixth grade I told my mom I said I’m not gonna die in

told my mom I said I’m not gonna die in

told my mom I said I’m not gonna die in small town florists at Missouri I’m

small town florists at Missouri I’m

small town florists at Missouri I’m either gonna go to New York or

either gonna go to New York or

either gonna go to New York or California why because I’m gonna be

California why because I’m gonna be

California why because I’m gonna be famous she’s like okay Donna Marie

famous she’s like okay Donna Marie

famous she’s like okay Donna Marie that’s great that’s wonderful when I was

that’s great that’s wonderful when I was

that’s great that’s wonderful when I was about 12 I auditioned for a patriotic

about 12 I auditioned for a patriotic

about 12 I auditioned for a patriotic singing group called the futures of

singing group called the futures of

singing group called the futures of America and through that we sang songs

America and through that we sang songs

America and through that we sang songs from the 30s to the 70s we did a

from the 30s to the 70s we did a

from the 30s to the 70s we did a patriotic finale we would sing at camps

patriotic finale we would sing at camps

patriotic finale we would sing at camps for children that were disabled we sang

for children that were disabled we sang

for children that were disabled we sang for veterans so I kind of grew up with

for veterans so I kind of grew up with

for veterans so I kind of grew up with this I guess personality and my it at

this I guess personality and my it at

this I guess personality and my it at that time was trying to be a cheerleader

that time was trying to be a cheerleader

that time was trying to be a cheerleader if you will for people brands and causes

if you will for people brands and causes

if you will for people brands and causes as I grew up through the years I really

as I grew up through the years I really

as I grew up through the years I really did want to move to New York my mom got

did want to move to New York my mom got

did want to move to New York my mom got sick when I was in high school and she

sick when I was in high school and she

sick when I was in high school and she was always my biggest fan

was always my biggest fan

was always my biggest fan and she had breast cancer and that was a

and she had breast cancer and that was a

and she had breast cancer and that was a really changing moment in my life where

really changing moment in my life where

really changing moment in my life where I had to become resilient and I had to

I had to become resilient and I had to

I had to become resilient and I had to be resourceful so here I was getting

be resourceful so here I was getting

be resourceful so here I was getting married having my first child and my mom

married having my first child and my mom

married having my first child and my mom died and she was always the person in my

died and she was always the person in my

died and she was always the person in my life that said oh that’s my baby I’m so

life that said oh that’s my baby I’m so

life that said oh that’s my baby I’m so proud of you and I no longer had that

proud of you and I no longer had that

proud of you and I no longer had that cheerleader in my life I had to become a

cheerleader in my life I had to become a

cheerleader in my life I had to become a cheerleader for myself after I got an

cheerleader for myself after I got an

cheerleader for myself after I got an opportunity to move to New York with my

opportunity to move to New York with my

opportunity to move to New York with my first husband because he got a new job I

first husband because he got a new job I

first husband because he got a new job I was very excited so here I was with a

was very excited so here I was with a

was very excited so here I was with a newborn child Andrew and we decided

newborn child Andrew and we decided

newborn child Andrew and we decided before we moved to New York that we’re

before we moved to New York that we’re

before we moved to New York that we’re gonna take a trip to California and we

gonna take a trip to California and we

gonna take a trip to California and we did but I was in the Northridge

did but I was in the Northridge

did but I was in the Northridge earthquake that year and Elise was a

earthquake that year and Elise was a

earthquake that year and Elise was a little tiny little baby and she was

little tiny little baby and she was

little tiny little baby and she was resting in this little cradle and when

resting in this little cradle and when

resting in this little cradle and when the earthquake hit something I was

the earthquake hit something I was

the earthquake hit something I was familiar about being prepared for

familiar about being prepared for

familiar about being prepared for because growing up in st. Louis they’re

because growing up in st. Louis they’re

because growing up in st. Louis they’re always talking about the New Madrid

always talking about the New Madrid

always talking about the New Madrid fault I woke up and I thought an

fault I woke up and I thought an

fault I woke up and I thought an airplane was landing and I was like

airplane was landing and I was like

airplane was landing and I was like what’s going on and I ran because Elise

what’s going on and I ran because Elise

what’s going on and I ran because Elise was sleeping in this little cradle well

was sleeping in this little cradle well

was sleeping in this little cradle well luckily she wasn’t there because a lamp

luckily she wasn’t there because a lamp

luckily she wasn’t there because a lamp had fallen in the cradle and she would

had fallen in the cradle and she would

had fallen in the cradle and she would have been crushed I had forgot that in

have been crushed I had forgot that in

have been crushed I had forgot that in the middle of the night I had woke up –

the middle of the night I had woke up –

the middle of the night I had woke up – she woke up to feed her Inge and she was

she woke up to feed her Inge and she was

she woke up to feed her Inge and she was near me she was with me so we all went

near me she was with me so we all went

near me she was with me so we all went into the bathroom and crazy things were

into the bathroom and crazy things were

into the bathroom and crazy things were happening and televisions were flying

happening and televisions were flying

happening and televisions were flying across the room and I said to somebody I

across the room and I said to somebody I

across the room and I said to somebody I said was this like a normal thing that

said was this like a normal thing that

said was this like a normal thing that people go through because I didn’t want

people go through because I didn’t want

people go through because I didn’t want to overreact and like no no no this was

to overreact and like no no no this was

to overreact and like no no no this was a major earthquake I said okay I still

a major earthquake I said okay I still

a major earthquake I said okay I still had that dream of being what famous but

had that dream of being what famous but

had that dream of being what famous but now I was getting to go to New York so

now I was getting to go to New York so

now I was getting to go to New York so packed with the babies drove across the

packed with the babies drove across the

packed with the babies drove across the United States from California to New

United States from California to New

United States from California to New York landed in New York my husband’s job

York landed in New York my husband’s job

York landed in New York my husband’s job was very stressful and it caused a

was very stressful and it caused a

was very stressful and it caused a strain on our marriage because I think I

strain on our marriage because I think I

strain on our marriage because I think I was really super homesick and I decided

was really super homesick and I decided

was really super homesick and I decided to become single that’s my positive way

to become single that’s my positive way

to become single that’s my positive way for putting miss pinning on I got

for putting miss pinning on I got

for putting miss pinning on I got divorced I decided to become single so

divorced I decided to become single so

divorced I decided to become single so yeah so here I was living in New York

yeah so here I was living in New York

yeah so here I was living in New York away from my family away from my friend

away from my family away from my friend

away from my family away from my friend I had two small children and I still

I had two small children and I still

I had two small children and I still decided I wanted to do something with my

decided I wanted to do something with my

decided I wanted to do something with my life

life

life I wanted to still participate so I

I wanted to still participate so I

I wanted to still participate so I worked at a local television station

worked at a local television station

worked at a local television station called WL and why CBS affiliate and I

called WL and why CBS affiliate and I

called WL and why CBS affiliate and I went there and I worked behind the

went there and I worked behind the

went there and I worked behind the scenes because I never felt pretty

scenes because I never felt pretty

scenes because I never felt pretty enough to be on television I thought my

enough to be on television I thought my

enough to be on television I thought my nose was too big I didn’t like the space

nose was too big I didn’t like the space

nose was too big I didn’t like the space between my teeth and just thought okay

between my teeth and just thought okay

between my teeth and just thought okay well I’ll do all this behind-the-scenes

well I’ll do all this behind-the-scenes

well I’ll do all this behind-the-scenes stuff and I did so here I was I was

stuff and I did so here I was I was

stuff and I did so here I was I was motherless because my mom died my best

motherless because my mom died my best

motherless because my mom died my best friend

friend

friend I was divorced living on Long Island

I was divorced living on Long Island

I was divorced living on Long Island then I fell in love again decided to get

then I fell in love again decided to get

then I fell in love again decided to get married again I married this wonderful

married again I married this wonderful

married again I married this wonderful man named Tom and he was an engineer and

man named Tom and he was an engineer and

man named Tom and he was an engineer and he wrote a song life is only what you

he wrote a song life is only what you

he wrote a song life is only what you make of it but shortly after we were

make of it but shortly after we were

make of it but shortly after we were married he had colon cancer and he died

married he had colon cancer and he died

married he had colon cancer and he died so I was motherless I was divorced and

so I was motherless I was divorced and

so I was motherless I was divorced and now I was widowed still a single mom so

now I was widowed still a single mom so

now I was widowed still a single mom so I said okay I’m gonna move forward with

I said okay I’m gonna move forward with

I said okay I’m gonna move forward with my life and I did and I worked at the

my life and I did and I worked at the

my life and I did and I worked at the television station for a long time and I

television station for a long time and I

television station for a long time and I would do corporate image videos and I

would do corporate image videos and I

would do corporate image videos and I would do voiceovers and things of that

would do voiceovers and things of that

would do voiceovers and things of that nature and then I had a dream literally

nature and then I had a dream literally

nature and then I had a dream literally a dream it was December 28th of 2008 I

a dream it was December 28th of 2008 I

a dream it was December 28th of 2008 I was sleeping and I dreamt the television

was sleeping and I dreamt the television

was sleeping and I dreamt the television show that I now have completely in color

show that I now have completely in color

show that I now have completely in color I found my it I also decided around that

I found my it I also decided around that

I found my it I also decided around that time to get married again

time to get married again

time to get married again so Tom dies I could start a new TV show

so Tom dies I could start a new TV show

so Tom dies I could start a new TV show I married this guy named Dan I’m 40

I married this guy named Dan I’m 40

I married this guy named Dan I’m 40 years old I decide to have another baby

years old I decide to have another baby

years old I decide to have another baby and I did and I have Matthew so now I

and I did and I have Matthew so now I

and I did and I have Matthew so now I have and release and Matthew but what

have and release and Matthew but what

have and release and Matthew but what happened I realized I didn’t really love

happened I realized I didn’t really love

happened I realized I didn’t really love Dan that I still loved Tom who died and

Dan that I still loved Tom who died and

Dan that I still loved Tom who died and you guessed it I became single again so

you guessed it I became single again so

you guessed it I became single again so now I was motherless I was divorced I

now I was motherless I was divorced I

now I was motherless I was divorced I was widowed I was divorced again now my

was widowed I was divorced again now my

was widowed I was divorced again now my third husband and I are still very good

third husband and I are still very good

third husband and I are still very good friends we’re Co raising Matthew and

friends we’re Co raising Matthew and

friends we’re Co raising Matthew and then the television stowe show just

then the television stowe show just

then the television stowe show just started taking off I dreamt the whole

started taking off I dreamt the whole

started taking off I dreamt the whole thing in color I went to the TV station

thing in color I went to the TV station

thing in color I went to the TV station where I used to work behind the scene

where I used to work behind the scene

where I used to work behind the scene I said I have an idea I had a dream I’m

I said I have an idea I had a dream I’m

I said I have an idea I had a dream I’m gonna have my own TV show I’m looking

gonna have my own TV show I’m looking

gonna have my own TV show I’m looking mean like you’re gonna have your own TV

mean like you’re gonna have your own TV

mean like you’re gonna have your own TV show people weren’t doing that then I

show people weren’t doing that then I

show people weren’t doing that then I said yes and I’m gonna call it live it

said yes and I’m gonna call it live it

said yes and I’m gonna call it live it up and they’re like okay and I based it

up and they’re like okay and I based it

up and they’re like okay and I based it upon two things December 28th of 2008

upon two things December 28th of 2008

upon two things December 28th of 2008 when I had the dream it would have been

when I had the dream it would have been

when I had the dream it would have been my wedding and anniversary to my husband

my wedding and anniversary to my husband

my wedding and anniversary to my husband Tom that died and he’s the one that

Tom that died and he’s the one that

Tom that died and he’s the one that wrote the song life is what you make of

wrote the song life is what you make of

wrote the song life is what you make of it so I put it all together live it up

it so I put it all together live it up

it so I put it all together live it up and I sold everything I owned because it

and I sold everything I owned because it

and I sold everything I owned because it was 2008 and the economy had tanked and

was 2008 and the economy had tanked and

was 2008 and the economy had tanked and there was no money there was no sponsors

there was no money there was no sponsors

there was no money there was no sponsors so I sold my house I sold everything I

so I sold my house I sold everything I

so I sold my house I sold everything I owned at a garage sale and decided to

owned at a garage sale and decided to

owned at a garage sale and decided to invest in myself to invest in my it and

invest in myself to invest in my it and

invest in myself to invest in my it and I’m here to share with you if I can do

I’m here to share with you if I can do

I’m here to share with you if I can do this you can do this how many people

this you can do this how many people

this you can do this how many people have an idea of their it how many people

have an idea of their it how many people

have an idea of their it how many people still are looking for their it how many

still are looking for their it how many

still are looking for their it how many people had in it and now they want

people had in it and now they want

people had in it and now they want another it okay so this is how we’re

another it okay so this is how we’re

another it okay so this is how we’re gonna do it it’s figuring out consistent

gonna do it it’s figuring out consistent

gonna do it it’s figuring out consistent unique strengths and there’s like five

unique strengths and there’s like five

unique strengths and there’s like five little keys that I think will help you

little keys that I think will help you

little keys that I think will help you and I’m holding on to this because I

and I’m holding on to this because I

and I’m holding on to this because I thought I needed it but I don’t okay so

thought I needed it but I don’t okay so

thought I needed it but I don’t okay so the first thing the first thing the

the first thing the first thing the

the first thing the first thing the first key is about snapping so we’re

first key is about snapping so we’re

first key is about snapping so we’re gonna figure it out okay so think of a

gonna figure it out okay so think of a

gonna figure it out okay so think of a time in your life that you were

time in your life that you were

time in your life that you were successful at something for me it was

successful at something for me it was

successful at something for me it was when I was in fifth grade and I decided

when I was in fifth grade and I decided

when I was in fifth grade and I decided to do a talent show and I had the people

to do a talent show and I had the people

to do a talent show and I had the people from the gym teachers move out the mats

from the gym teachers move out the mats

from the gym teachers move out the mats and I am enrolled everybody and she

and I am enrolled everybody and she

and I am enrolled everybody and she doing gymnastics and singing songs you

doing gymnastics and singing songs you

doing gymnastics and singing songs you know what goes up must come down

know what goes up must come down

know what goes up must come down spinning wheels we’re doing cartwheels

spinning wheels we’re doing cartwheels

spinning wheels we’re doing cartwheels and things like that so that was one of

and things like that so that was one of

and things like that so that was one of my early moments of things that I could

my early moments of things that I could

my early moments of things that I could snap so that I could go back in time and

snap so that I could go back in time and

snap so that I could go back in time and look at it and say if I can do that I

look at it and say if I can do that I

look at it and say if I can do that I can do something another big snap it

can do something another big snap it

can do something another big snap it moment for me was when I got to

moment for me was when I got to

moment for me was when I got to interview Jay Leno so I thought to

interview Jay Leno so I thought to

interview Jay Leno so I thought to myself I was like wow I called my dad

myself I was like wow I called my dad

myself I was like wow I called my dad because my mom’s no longer there and I

because my mom’s no longer there and I

because my mom’s no longer there and I called my dad and st. Louis I said

called my dad and st. Louis I said

called my dad and st. Louis I said you’re not gonna believe this and I’m

you’re not gonna believe this and I’m

you’re not gonna believe this and I’m crying he goes baby you okay I said yeah

crying he goes baby you okay I said yeah

crying he goes baby you okay I said yeah I said but it’s not like your daughter

I said but it’s not like your daughter

I said but it’s not like your daughter grew up to be on The Tonight Show I said

grew up to be on The Tonight Show I said

grew up to be on The Tonight Show I said the guy from The Tonight Show was on

the guy from The Tonight Show was on

the guy from The Tonight Show was on your daughter’s show I was like just

your daughter’s show I was like just

your daughter’s show I was like just crying so that was a moment for me that

crying so that was a moment for me that

crying so that was a moment for me that changed my life and if you look on the

changed my life and if you look on the

changed my life and if you look on the of your own life whether it’s when you

of your own life whether it’s when you

of your own life whether it’s when you were in fifth grade or whether you did

were in fifth grade or whether you did

were in fifth grade or whether you did something successful as an adult maybe

something successful as an adult maybe

something successful as an adult maybe somebody wrote a nice article about you

somebody wrote a nice article about you

somebody wrote a nice article about you here in Hilton Head or somewhere along

here in Hilton Head or somewhere along

here in Hilton Head or somewhere along the line and if you can snap it if you

the line and if you can snap it if you

the line and if you can snap it if you could just make a little picture of

could just make a little picture of

could just make a little picture of yourself in a successful moment and then

yourself in a successful moment and then

yourself in a successful moment and then create a new project for yourself based

create a new project for yourself based

create a new project for yourself based upon the fact that you know you’ve

upon the fact that you know you’ve

upon the fact that you know you’ve already had a success okay so let’s move

already had a success okay so let’s move

already had a success okay so let’s move to the next slide okay the next one is

to the next slide okay the next one is

to the next slide okay the next one is out so the word is focused so it’s

out so the word is focused so it’s

out so the word is focused so it’s figuring out consistent unique strengths

figuring out consistent unique strengths

figuring out consistent unique strengths so the second letter stands for out and

so the second letter stands for out and

so the second letter stands for out and it’s about serving it and now I don’t

it’s about serving it and now I don’t

it’s about serving it and now I don’t play tennis but maybe I’ll learn if I

play tennis but maybe I’ll learn if I

play tennis but maybe I’ll learn if I move to Hilton Head it’s about how are

move to Hilton Head it’s about how are

move to Hilton Head it’s about how are you other-centered who are you when

you other-centered who are you when

you other-centered who are you when you’re out in life are you serving on a

you’re out in life are you serving on a

you’re out in life are you serving on a board are you volunteering are you the

board are you volunteering are you the

board are you volunteering are you the people round of applause yay you TEDx

people round of applause yay you TEDx

people round of applause yay you TEDx tours that are signing everybody in

tours that are signing everybody in

tours that are signing everybody in today that’s name and face recognition

today that’s name and face recognition

today that’s name and face recognition right so figure it out figuring out who

right so figure it out figuring out who

right so figure it out figuring out who you are at your unique self is just

you are at your unique self is just

you are at your unique self is just looking at times in the past or times in

looking at times in the past or times in

looking at times in the past or times in the present where there’s something

the present where there’s something

the present where there’s something unique and special about you whatever

unique and special about you whatever

unique and special about you whatever your it is and this is how you’re going

your it is and this is how you’re going

your it is and this is how you’re going to do it you’re gonna write down all the

to do it you’re gonna write down all the

to do it you’re gonna write down all the things that you’re involved in you know

things that you’re involved in you know

things that you’re involved in you know do you love pets are you helping out

do you love pets are you helping out

do you love pets are you helping out with the Humane Society are you saving

with the Humane Society are you saving

with the Humane Society are you saving the Turtles I loved her speech she was

the Turtles I loved her speech she was

the Turtles I loved her speech she was awesome so are you doing things like

awesome so are you doing things like

awesome so are you doing things like that and that’s gonna be your second

that and that’s gonna be your second

that and that’s gonna be your second piece of your puzzle and figuring out

piece of your puzzle and figuring out

piece of your puzzle and figuring out your a how and thank you for taking

your a how and thank you for taking

your a how and thank you for taking notes that makes me happy so figuring it

notes that makes me happy so figuring it

notes that makes me happy so figuring it out okay so the next piece is refresh it

out okay so the next piece is refresh it

out okay so the next piece is refresh it refresh it so this key is interesting

refresh it so this key is interesting

refresh it so this key is interesting because it’s about consistent what do

because it’s about consistent what do

because it’s about consistent what do you consistently do are you consistently

you consistently do are you consistently

you consistently do are you consistently nice do you consistently open the doors

nice do you consistently open the doors

nice do you consistently open the doors you know is there a way that you are

you know is there a way that you are

you know is there a way that you are able to find things about yourself that

able to find things about yourself that

able to find things about yourself that are consistent I try to be kind I try to

are consistent I try to be kind I try to

are consistent I try to be kind I try to be other focused you know I try to be

be other focused you know I try to be

be other focused you know I try to be smiley you know so these are some things

smiley you know so these are some things

smiley you know so these are some things one of my tips for this idea is to take

one of my tips for this idea is to take

one of my tips for this idea is to take a water bottle and take the label off of

a water bottle and take the label off of

a water bottle and take the label off of it you know buy a whole case of water

it you know buy a whole case of water

it you know buy a whole case of water just take take labels off of it or take

just take take labels off of it or take

just take take labels off of it or take a picture if you like your tap water and

a picture if you like your tap water and

a picture if you like your tap water and just put a label on it the talks about

just put a label on it the talks about

just put a label on it the talks about your three consistent strengths

your three consistent strengths

your three consistent strengths so and whatever those are for you and

so and whatever those are for you and

so and whatever those are for you and then every time you’re pouring the water

then every time you’re pouring the water

then every time you’re pouring the water you’re refreshing yourself you’re

you’re refreshing yourself you’re

you’re refreshing yourself you’re constantly reminded the thing that I

constantly reminded the thing that I

constantly reminded the thing that I find so refreshing about you is boom

find so refreshing about you is boom

find so refreshing about you is boom boom and boom okay so that’s your third

boom and boom okay so that’s your third

boom and boom okay so that’s your third key everybody good the next one is

key everybody good the next one is

key everybody good the next one is unique everybody is born on one day and

unique everybody is born on one day and

unique everybody is born on one day and you die on one day you get here one day

you die on one day you get here one day

you die on one day you get here one day you got to leave on one day you know

you got to leave on one day you know

you got to leave on one day you know people talk about the journey they talk

people talk about the journey they talk

people talk about the journey they talk about the in and the out well here it’s

about the in and the out well here it’s

about the in and the out well here it’s your birthday my mom who you know I love

your birthday my mom who you know I love

your birthday my mom who you know I love she remembered everybody’s birthday way

she remembered everybody’s birthday way

she remembered everybody’s birthday way before social media we had a calendar at

before social media we had a calendar at

before social media we had a calendar at our house and every single day she would

our house and every single day she would

our house and every single day she would write down who she knew that was born on

write down who she knew that was born on

write down who she knew that was born on that day basically because Marilyn down

that day basically because Marilyn down

that day basically because Marilyn down the street her husband forgot her

the street her husband forgot her

the street her husband forgot her birthday so should go my mom she goes

birthday so should go my mom she goes

birthday so should go my mom she goes don forgot my birthday and she was

don forgot my birthday and she was

don forgot my birthday and she was crying at my mom’s like don’t worry

crying at my mom’s like don’t worry

crying at my mom’s like don’t worry Marilyn every year I’m gonna remember

Marilyn every year I’m gonna remember

Marilyn every year I’m gonna remember your birthday so literally on the day my

your birthday so literally on the day my

your birthday so literally on the day my mom died which was January 31st of 1990

mom died which was January 31st of 1990

mom died which was January 31st of 1990 few days later her funeral it was cold

few days later her funeral it was cold

few days later her funeral it was cold it was social cold and there were people

it was social cold and there were people

it was social cold and there were people lined up all the way throughout the

lined up all the way throughout the

lined up all the way throughout the cemetery and and every single person

cemetery and and every single person

cemetery and and every single person came up to me and said I’m gonna

came up to me and said I’m gonna

came up to me and said I’m gonna remember your mom on my birthday I was

remember your mom on my birthday I was

remember your mom on my birthday I was like wow still to this day it’s been

like wow still to this day it’s been

like wow still to this day it’s been some 20-something years close to thirty

some 20-something years close to thirty

some 20-something years close to thirty years ago and people are still calling

years ago and people are still calling

years ago and people are still calling it gets my birthday and I’ll say oh

it gets my birthday and I’ll say oh

it gets my birthday and I’ll say oh happy birthday they’re like I’m praying

happy birthday they’re like I’m praying

happy birthday they’re like I’m praying for your mom I’m like okay thanks so

for your mom I’m like okay thanks so

for your mom I’m like okay thanks so much you know it’s like a huge thing so

much you know it’s like a huge thing so

much you know it’s like a huge thing so my idea for this is to make your own

my idea for this is to make your own

my idea for this is to make your own birthday card this year you know you can

birthday card this year you know you can

birthday card this year you know you can even do it today when we’re at lunch

even do it today when we’re at lunch

even do it today when we’re at lunch break just take a piece of paper fold it

break just take a piece of paper fold it

break just take a piece of paper fold it in half write happy birthday to yourself

in half write happy birthday to yourself

in half write happy birthday to yourself and remember that you are unique and

and remember that you are unique and

and remember that you are unique and then voice it maybe call your friends

then voice it maybe call your friends

then voice it maybe call your friends when it’s their birthday and happy

when it’s their birthday and happy

when it’s their birthday and happy birthday to them find a way to connect

birthday to them find a way to connect

birthday to them find a way to connect with community with your unique self you

with community with your unique self you

with community with your unique self you know you have a voice right how lovely

know you have a voice right how lovely

know you have a voice right how lovely would it be if somebody you know heard

would it be if somebody you know heard

would it be if somebody you know heard you singing happy birthday to them sing

you singing happy birthday to them sing

you singing happy birthday to them sing happy birthday to yourself okay and then

happy birthday to yourself okay and then

happy birthday to yourself okay and then the last key is strengths and sharing it

the last key is strengths and sharing it

the last key is strengths and sharing it okay so it’s figuring out consistent

okay so it’s figuring out consistent

okay so it’s figuring out consistent unique strengths a lot of times as

unique strengths a lot of times as

unique strengths a lot of times as you’re going through this process and

you’re going through this process and

you’re going through this process and you’re finding what your it is in life

you’re finding what your it is in life

you’re finding what your it is in life you look around and you’re like

you look around and you’re like

you look around and you’re like I got that horse saddle and I have it

I got that horse saddle and I have it

I got that horse saddle and I have it rode in like 20-something years you know

rode in like 20-something years you know

rode in like 20-something years you know time to get e on up and maybe send that

time to get e on up and maybe send that

time to get e on up and maybe send that saddle to somebody that could absolutely

saddle to somebody that could absolutely

saddle to somebody that could absolutely use it you know and start finding those

use it you know and start finding those

use it you know and start finding those places in your life where you’re just

places in your life where you’re just

places in your life where you’re just filled around with clutter and there’s

filled around with clutter and there’s

filled around with clutter and there’s things that you don’t need anymore and

things that you don’t need anymore and

things that you don’t need anymore and also sharing your time and sharing your

also sharing your time and sharing your

also sharing your time and sharing your strengths your time your talent and your

strengths your time your talent and your

strengths your time your talent and your treasure

treasure

treasure my mom had a Helen Steiner rice picture

my mom had a Helen Steiner rice picture

my mom had a Helen Steiner rice picture up in our bathroom that said it’s not

up in our bathroom that said it’s not

up in our bathroom that said it’s not the things that can be bought that are

the things that can be bought that are

the things that can be bought that are life’s richest treasures it’s the little

life’s richest treasures it’s the little

life’s richest treasures it’s the little heart gifts that money cannot measure so

heart gifts that money cannot measure so

heart gifts that money cannot measure so figuring out consistent unique strengths

figuring out consistent unique strengths

figuring out consistent unique strengths to help you be resilient to help you be

to help you be resilient to help you be

to help you be resilient to help you be resourceful in your life did I want to

resourceful in your life did I want to

resourceful in your life did I want to be widowed no did I want to choose to be

be widowed no did I want to choose to be

be widowed no did I want to choose to be single or divorced as many times as I

single or divorced as many times as I

single or divorced as many times as I wanted no did I want to be famous yes

wanted no did I want to be famous yes

wanted no did I want to be famous yes but now for me it’s not about me being

but now for me it’s not about me being

but now for me it’s not about me being famous it’s about celebrating the

famous it’s about celebrating the

famous it’s about celebrating the essence of life it provides me a

essence of life it provides me a

essence of life it provides me a platform where I can interview

platform where I can interview

platform where I can interview celebrities like I said it doesn’t

celebrities like I said it doesn’t

celebrities like I said it doesn’t matter to me that they’re famous I want

matter to me that they’re famous I want

matter to me that they’re famous I want to know what their it is in life how are

to know what their it is in life how are

to know what their it is in life how are they helping people what’s their give to

they helping people what’s their give to

they helping people what’s their give to the community I interview businesses

the community I interview businesses

the community I interview businesses about how cool they are and how

about how cool they are and how

about how cool they are and how resilient they are and how resourceful

resilient they are and how resourceful

resilient they are and how resourceful they are for starting their own

they are for starting their own

they are for starting their own businesses and I interview nonprofit

businesses and I interview nonprofit

businesses and I interview nonprofit organizations and once again if I can do

organizations and once again if I can do

organizations and once again if I can do this you can do this I thank you so very

this you can do this I thank you so very

this you can do this I thank you so very very much for being here with me for

very much for being here with me for

very much for being here with me for spending your time with me this is all

spending your time with me this is all

spending your time with me this is all about being your unique self thank you

about being your unique self thank you

about being your unique self thank you ladies and gentlemen

”

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