Why it is never too late to have a happy childhood | Stefan Hammel | TEDxMagdeburg

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maybe I’m not sure

I would have to be with them first

excuse me because I have with them

made something for everyone they did not care about

knowledge

but not at all with them

as a Prussian audience but with

them out of my head

have so I stood there before

I thought maybe I could

get a palpitation when I’m in front here

and maybe there I have

they can see it when they look

front right in front of each of theirs

chairs a mental wastebasket

in which they put their criticism

can deposit if you have any

then I thought it would be

still a little too here

in case you like that

self criticism critical you can yes

later also look at what

If only our whole life would be one

history would be us ourselves

tell a story about ours

Memories of our expectations

about the person we are and about

the others around us what if

the whole life would be a story

we ourselves and each other

tell and the other tells us

have we believed or rejected

or have changed

I would like to talk about this with you tonight

do not think about it or almost do not

but much better about why time

actually no big one in life

plays and why it’s never too late

is next for a happy children

the thing with the time

Well, our time is over

past present and future or

actually more correct from memory

Perception and expectations

because what we have of the time, yes

actually memory and perception

expectation biologically is the

past present and future

and all three find in our brain

in the now instead of memory we experience

now our perception and theirs

meaning happens in the brain and now

our expectation now and if that

brain is a network where everything is

can then influence each other

but our subsequent reminder the

now takes place our former

Remembrance creatively influence

enrich and also heal and also

our current perception and theirs

could mean our former

memories as well as that

current in us now takes place

influence

I do not know how I am

I often in my life and still

far too often today myself too experienced

as if I live the city

I design as a therapist and

Clinic chaplain very many people around

me which I then

cable that you endure life more

as if it were who suffers or

reimbursed or designed for that is

in a sense ours or ours

Brain and we could do ours

brain ask if it’s constructive

could reshape something so

that’s usually what we do

So expect our hopes and expectations

fears from our memories

where else and that from ours

Expectations to a surprisingly high

Share our experiences will be when we

remind us as much as we do

ice fell and that’s why

on the ice now fear

Then fall again

our muscles are tense and the risk

falling again and if we go down

We remember that a doctor always us

helped again and now he has us

prescribed a drug and us

said that he very well help then

that probably also help very well

even if it is a placebo if we are

expect us humans friendly

then we will meet them

naturally friendly and meet

sir, they actually meet us

friendly and vice versa

certainly synonymous otherwise much higher degree than

we think that generates ours

Expectations our experiences

Now that’s pleasant memories

From the pleasant expectations will be out

the pleasant experience will be from the

pleasant memories will become of those

at

Expectations will be pleasant

Experience will become more pleasant

Remembrance does not matter

Although we say as much experience can

do not be fooled

and if it might be one

self-fulfilling prophecy is the

as a result we get what we do

expect what we have remembered is it

yes not so bad but at the

unpleasant memories from the

unpleasant expectations will be out of the

be unpleasant experiences and

unpleasant memories we then

call experiences as it may be

already desirable the cycle

to interrupt once and not to

say that’s experience i know how

that ‘s how I am and that’ s how it is

But world how could we because this

that could interrupt the cycle

then we would have to go somehow

get that from across new thoughts

come in apropos thoughts what are

because actually I have them

ever watched while thinking

I’ve tried this for a long time and if you can

that exercises a long time then it goes a bit

and eventually you understand better

Thinking works that is

By the way, in every person a little

shift a bit

So that’s not how it is with me

that with most people though

similarly, that’s roughly speaking

There are two kinds of things we

to call thoughts

on the one hand, inner films, so to speak

tagträume simulates it and looks like it

other inner voices we sometimes agree

hear more than if they talked to us

or sometimes more like we are

to say that to someone else or as if

we talk to ourselves more than once

speakers more than a handset so

talk of self that are thoughts movies

or self-talk and if we

such thoughts have, for example, memorial

thoughts to the memory

Interestingly enough , then always

the whole body reactions and

still with emotions

By the way, that’s the company

delivery status but that does not have to

be so

they could also size and brain

pray that now

for example, with remarkable power

calm serenity and even with

Interest and curiosity about things is a consideration

they hitherto thought not reluctant

had

and if you brain this course

align then it probably says

I can only do it

no one asked and therefore that belongs

you can do it too

Try and once on the base

of this great thing think of this

usually do not like each other so much

would have remembered

at the same time 50 more relaxed than when

otherwise most likely

So we could do ours

brain

the company a bit different too

shape as normal

and there are many possibilities

I said earlier time does not matter

and in the brain that’s actually how it is

that’s why chronology think so

sooner and later such a rand

Function is our brain arranges things

much sooner if they are together

happen as to the question what before

or afterwards, or when they were each other

resemble and our brain arranges the

Things are much more spatial than temporal

and besides that has imaginative

clear up the thing in models themselves

two weimar were structured that

Brains occupy the outside space

we mostly call our environment and in

Interior we mostly ours

Interestingly enough, body names come

the information about these two

all of them are over ours

nerve strands to us the one through

ours see and hear the nerves and the

nerves in the back of the skin surface and

the others through the nerves in ours

body inside and that will be in

Our country is processed as if it were

not produced in your body at all

but what is considered outside

is like a holography to the outside

projected and what is inside

heard comes in such an inner outside

below her brain and actually

is in the world of the mind or the

every one of them is just another

Now they could ask each other but mine

sitting neighbor or my seat neighbor is

but really real and not only in

my head or i can give them that

do not say so exactly

I can only tell you that everything

you about your neighbor or your neighbor

Neighboring knowledge is present in them

because it is produced in them and how

Any external data in the inside data

to be converted according to which rules

and whether these regulate adequate and what

at all an adequate conversion

nothing is known about it

and I think so too

find out nothing because we come

not go out if there is a there there

actually does not have much sense

to talk about a coach if you like

But there is nothing in there except one

is somehow a paradox

people who are important in their lives

on the one hand it makes a difference

they can differentiate between theirs

Parents siblings neighbors outside the

physically biological and the trainer

still have to conny go over what

They drink outside even though they only have theirs

ideas and who knows what the others are doing there

think outside and on the other

page it’s also in turn was the

everything they are about out there

knowledge

It’s happening inside and she just

the inside

that was a bit strange but it

may be useful for the therapy

and self-management in life

I would like to at this point

Invite a little experiment

those who want that

imagine if they are us

have so much of important

other people in our head

the others are in the same place as usual

my head and when they are in like that

a movie some person times

imagine

which sometimes annoys so that’s it

someone who sometimes annoys or

annoys that annoying and if they are

times these people are annoying

make it aware that it’s kind of a

person in my head or body

submitted

and if they say well , man in

my body and brain belongs in the

difference to the physical original

I can do more with that yes

we need something

So they could use this one

people just annoying

so press out their heads out there

Set the directions near the door

over there in there not out

but only to the door so on

not only the person who is so annoying

film as a portrait of a holography there

over there next to the door and once

look how he looks like the looks as

out of there before the

inside the annoyed has the out there weighs

how it breathes

as it’s out there his facial expression

how is his posture out there

his muscles and such things

it could be that they notice him

when they become aware after

looked a bit bissl there were 1000

for a facial expression

muscle tension breath and so on

that they notice that I somehow

first of all, if he is more pleasant

is outside and secondly, after you do so

have watched a bit like that

it is much less so in him outside

that’s actually very strange

with our emotions the emotions

we have

they are actually networks

body experience so when we are sad

something happens in the eyes in the neck

stomach in our breath heartbeat

blood pressure and in parallel something like that though

we get angry or annoyed

or we look forward to it and when I see it

shamefully asked the it

to think of people like this

can be a bit exhausting

then maybe that started in them

themselves

one has to lead a bit unwell

so this body reaction i said

we will remember something

with our thanks then come the

Body reaction mostly but if

that’s over there then it already is

a little more pleasant maybe even a lot

now we could all be in one

second part the story continues

think

sometime who knows when someday

we probably will not all

but we do not live more and he does not

can imagine that this

Maybe then in one person

otherworldly world is somewhere else

you can imagine it’s the one

Believe in others it is deeply

a thought experiment this human in

an otherworldly world and we could

our story of these people

Let’s keep running out of our heads

imagine that man is out

our head in the other world all

show sacred and loving people

who ever lived there

have and count in there to a kind

school goes and matures after what would

probably happen when he is a few months

with the most loving wisest people

goes to school

At some point, everyone has to mature

At some point man was going to mature and

to have a good influence

and if not only a few months

but are a year or several years

then more

And if you think about it, there is time

actually no role over there

also plays less than here

then he would have to stay there for so long

the school goes in such wisdom

development meeting place so far

finally changed a lot

and calls her introduce herself to that

this wise changes to us again

come back because there

he can have learned 1000 years there

and now he’s back here because there

shows yes is relative and now he is

back here and to see the man

changed again by such a

spiritual or different experience

it is free you can do that

a little bit as they can imagine

a drawer it’s a trick

would open it and everything he did

ever experienced and suffered

and done and experienced in such a way

type of recyclable container do it and

then when he does everything on his own

has what he has ever suffered and experienced

she can return the container

and then on his active ingredient

bring up if you can now

again look at the essential

to experience more pleasant and something completely

peculiar is that when we are with

People in therapy have such processes

shape and then they come back to

skin after home sometime you meet there

yes then mostly neither the biological

original and then they come back in

Therapy and then they tell me that

biological original totally

changed so much more pleasant too

it is possible you can do that

try out

they have chosen someone

and maybe she will

you ‘ll see if you can see that

it’s also true that he is somehow different

pleasantly different explains one

play with neurons or with

development bank with adjustment to

expectations of others explained

maybe with projection or later

noticed they are now experiencing and in the

Couple therapy can be observed that

if you look this way

present partner the other unfortunately

did not join the absent from the

head next to urge to sit on the sofa that

then

if you work with both and so on

bit ignored the fact of the day

that since a visible threaten the

this is visible then the relationship of

visible partners to the invisible

Improved in the course of work and

if the visible next time

comes again then he says so too

partner has changed in an improved way

the relationship has changed and

that really made me think

that I observe that the couples therapy

with a partner and an invisible one

this is often almost as effective

like humanity really

a good thing and that’s why I want

tell them today if it suits them

sometimes so is that they live their na

yes, we say so far experienced more than

then they have considered that

Maybe life is a story

we tell ourselves and that

we can ask our brains

films that produce our emotions

and our body reactions times

on a trial basis and was changed

proven to keep and that is

it plays no role at all and

that does traumatize or in the priory

or else were the information is

the same can in their brain so

the later the

it just depends on us that we have the idea

could give up the past

no one will change it as soon as we see it

is concerned biological

past memory and that can

you continue to shape your brain

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