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Unleashing Female Potential | Emma Doyle | TEDxOneonta


welcome to my world the world of sport

welcome to my world the world of sport the world of tennis now sport has a

the world of tennis now sport has a

the world of tennis now sport has a wonderful way of bringing people

wonderful way of bringing people

wonderful way of bringing people together it can transcend boundaries of

together it can transcend boundaries of

together it can transcend boundaries of race and religion in a way like no other

race and religion in a way like no other

race and religion in a way like no other event on the planet most of the world

event on the planet most of the world

event on the planet most of the world stops in breathless anticipation for

stops in breathless anticipation for

stops in breathless anticipation for finals in major sporting events the

finals in major sporting events the

finals in major sporting events the soccer world cup the Masters in golf

soccer world cup the Masters in golf

soccer world cup the Masters in golf Wimbledon the Olympic Games the list

Wimbledon the Olympic Games the list

Wimbledon the Olympic Games the list goes on it is arguably the great unifier

goes on it is arguably the great unifier

goes on it is arguably the great unifier in the hearts and minds of millions of

in the hearts and minds of millions of

in the hearts and minds of millions of people it allows us to play have fun yet

people it allows us to play have fun yet

people it allows us to play have fun yet in a serious way now this is why I find

in a serious way now this is why I find

in a serious way now this is why I find the great sport of tennis so fascinating

the great sport of tennis so fascinating

the great sport of tennis so fascinating it’s a problem-solving game and the ball

it’s a problem-solving game and the ball

it’s a problem-solving game and the ball never bounces in the same way twice just

never bounces in the same way twice just

never bounces in the same way twice just as in life no two decisions are ever the

as in life no two decisions are ever the

as in life no two decisions are ever the same and when you’re in a singles match

same and when you’re in a singles match

same and when you’re in a singles match that you care deeply about and it’s 5-4

that you care deeply about and it’s 5-4

that you care deeply about and it’s 5-4 in that final set it’s often not the

in that final set it’s often not the

in that final set it’s often not the player with the prettier technique that

player with the prettier technique that

player with the prettier technique that wins but the person with the stronger

wins but the person with the stronger

wins but the person with the stronger character the biggest heart

character the biggest heart

character the biggest heart you are alone your character is exposed

you are alone your character is exposed

you are alone your character is exposed and ultimately you are defined by the

and ultimately you are defined by the

and ultimately you are defined by the results of your decisions and your

results of your decisions and your

results of your decisions and your actions it is theater on a grand scale

actions it is theater on a grand scale

actions it is theater on a grand scale in the words of William Shakespeare all

in the words of William Shakespeare all

in the words of William Shakespeare all the world’s a stage and all the men and

the world’s a stage and all the men and

the world’s a stage and all the men and women are merely players well on this

women are merely players well on this

women are merely players well on this world stage statistics tell us that

world stage statistics tell us that

world stage statistics tell us that females make up forty nine point six

females make up forty nine point six

females make up forty nine point six percent of the population yet in reality

percent of the population yet in reality

percent of the population yet in reality there are far fewer females contributing

there are far fewer females contributing

there are far fewer females contributing despite major advances in equal prize

despite major advances in equal prize

despite major advances in equal prize money in tennis for both males and

money in tennis for both males and

money in tennis for both males and females and the enormous efforts of

females and the enormous efforts of

females and the enormous efforts of Billie Jean King defeating Bobby Riggs

Billie Jean King defeating Bobby Riggs

Billie Jean King defeating Bobby Riggs in the battle of the sexes in 1973 the

in the battle of the sexes in 1973 the

in the battle of the sexes in 1973 the simple facts are

simple facts are

simple facts are here in the United States ESPN

here in the United States ESPN

here in the United States ESPN SportsCenter devotes only 5% of its

SportsCenter devotes only 5% of its

SportsCenter devotes only 5% of its coverage to women athletes in the United

coverage to women athletes in the United

coverage to women athletes in the United Kingdom women account for just 10% of

Kingdom women account for just 10% of

Kingdom women account for just 10% of sports journalists and in Australia

sports journalists and in Australia

sports journalists and in Australia there are only 19% of qualified female

there are only 19% of qualified female

there are only 19% of qualified female tennis coaches and would you believe

tennis coaches and would you believe

tennis coaches and would you believe there are more CEOs named John than

there are more CEOs named John than

there are more CEOs named John than there are female CEOs the scales of

there are female CEOs the scales of

there are female CEOs the scales of justice are clearly out of balance in

justice are clearly out of balance in

justice are clearly out of balance in relation to contributions of both males

relation to contributions of both males

relation to contributions of both males and females and interestingly in junior

and females and interestingly in junior

and females and interestingly in junior tennis 80% of unforced errors occur when

tennis 80% of unforced errors occur when

tennis 80% of unforced errors occur when you are off balance and the other

you are off balance and the other

you are off balance and the other revealing statistic in my home state is

revealing statistic in my home state is

revealing statistic in my home state is that one in every two Victorian female

that one in every two Victorian female

that one in every two Victorian female tennis players and no longer playing

tennis players and no longer playing

tennis players and no longer playing tennis by the time they reach the late

tennis by the time they reach the late

tennis by the time they reach the late teens the argument is clear we cannot

teens the argument is clear we cannot

teens the argument is clear we cannot reach our potential as individuals as

reach our potential as individuals as

reach our potential as individuals as societies unless we make use of the

societies unless we make use of the

societies unless we make use of the talents of all the fact that we are not

talents of all the fact that we are not

talents of all the fact that we are not making use of female energy is a massive

making use of female energy is a massive

making use of female energy is a massive loss in sport and a huge loss for women

loss in sport and a huge loss for women

loss in sport and a huge loss for women as leaders beyond tennis this energy is

as leaders beyond tennis this energy is

as leaders beyond tennis this energy is being repressed it is being imprisoned

being repressed it is being imprisoned

being repressed it is being imprisoned so what can we do about it

so what can we do about it

so what can we do about it well when I returned home from playing

well when I returned home from playing

well when I returned home from playing us college tennis with my degree in hand

us college tennis with my degree in hand

us college tennis with my degree in hand I wanted to become the best tennis coach

I wanted to become the best tennis coach

I wanted to become the best tennis coach that I could possibly be so what did I

that I could possibly be so what did I

that I could possibly be so what did I do

do

do I volunteered to coach at a Women’s

I volunteered to coach at a Women’s

I volunteered to coach at a Women’s youth detention center now you might be

youth detention center now you might be

youth detention center now you might be thinking that’s a little extreme okay

thinking that’s a little extreme okay

thinking that’s a little extreme okay but I grew up in a household that really

but I grew up in a household that really

but I grew up in a household that really encouraged stretching your comfort zone

encouraged stretching your comfort zone

encouraged stretching your comfort zone so on that morning I arrived early

so on that morning I arrived early

so on that morning I arrived early little bit nervous excited minor problem

little bit nervous excited minor problem

little bit nervous excited minor problem as I was walking through security right

as I was walking through security right

as I was walking through security right the guard found that I had one of these

the guard found that I had one of these

the guard found that I had one of these our footwork ladders in the bottom of my

our footwork ladders in the bottom of my

our footwork ladders in the bottom of my basket and you know despite

basket and you know despite

basket and you know despite I’m showing him all the benefits you

I’m showing him all the benefits you

I’m showing him all the benefits you know that you could do to be like quick

know that you could do to be like quick

know that you could do to be like quick on your toes and we’ll be fair to say

on your toes and we’ll be fair to say

on your toes and we’ll be fair to say probably not the best piece of equipment

probably not the best piece of equipment

probably not the best piece of equipment to be taking into a woman’s prison right

to be taking into a woman’s prison right

to be taking into a woman’s prison right so anyway what I did is um you know I

so anyway what I did is um you know I

so anyway what I did is um you know I proceeded to meticulously set up my

proceeded to meticulously set up my

proceeded to meticulously set up my indoor tennis court as per my lesson

indoor tennis court as per my lesson

indoor tennis court as per my lesson plan

plan

plan suddenly a dozen high-energy females

suddenly a dozen high-energy females

suddenly a dozen high-energy females walked into the room they picked up the

walked into the room they picked up the

walked into the room they picked up the racquets and they began smashing the

racquets and they began smashing the

racquets and they began smashing the balls in any and every direction it was

balls in any and every direction it was

balls in any and every direction it was complete chaos there were balls flying

complete chaos there were balls flying

complete chaos there were balls flying everywhere all of my senses were alert I

everywhere all of my senses were alert I

everywhere all of my senses were alert I had to listen with my eyes I had no

had to listen with my eyes I had no

had to listen with my eyes I had no choice and trust my instincts as I said

choice and trust my instincts as I said

choice and trust my instincts as I said what everybody pick up a racket which of

what everybody pick up a racket which of

what everybody pick up a racket which of course they already had and then I said

course they already had and then I said

course they already had and then I said I want you to hit the ball as hard as

I want you to hit the ball as hard as

I want you to hit the ball as hard as you can in any in every direction which

you can in any in every direction which

you can in any in every direction which of course they were already doing and

of course they were already doing and

of course they were already doing and then I just spent my time like trying to

then I just spent my time like trying to

then I just spent my time like trying to spread them out to avoid a major

spread them out to avoid a major

spread them out to avoid a major catastrophe or any injuries and then

catastrophe or any injuries and then

catastrophe or any injuries and then after about five minutes I said okay

after about five minutes I said okay

after about five minutes I said okay bring it in and to my amazement they did

bring it in and to my amazement they did

bring it in and to my amazement they did they were now ready to accept me because

they were now ready to accept me because

they were now ready to accept me because I had allowed them to express himself in

I had allowed them to express himself in

I had allowed them to express himself in the only way that they knew how this

the only way that they knew how this

the only way that they knew how this story is a great metaphor for the

story is a great metaphor for the

story is a great metaphor for the imprisoned female energy and its urgent

imprisoned female energy and its urgent

imprisoned female energy and its urgent need to express itself now I didn’t

need to express itself now I didn’t

need to express itself now I didn’t realize at the time just how valuable

realize at the time just how valuable

realize at the time just how valuable this lesson was as a young coach and in

this lesson was as a young coach and in

this lesson was as a young coach and in my quest for knowledge and growth I

my quest for knowledge and growth I

my quest for knowledge and growth I continued to put myself in unfamiliar

continued to put myself in unfamiliar

continued to put myself in unfamiliar situations asking myself the same

situations asking myself the same

situations asking myself the same question over and over again so what

question over and over again so what

question over and over again so what does make a great coach to me this is

does make a great coach to me this is

does make a great coach to me this is the Holy Grail question of coaching at

the Holy Grail question of coaching at

the Holy Grail question of coaching at the US Open a couple of years ago I put

the US Open a couple of years ago I put

the US Open a couple of years ago I put this question to one of the best players

this question to one of the best players

this question to one of the best players in the world

in the world

in the world Roger Federer

Roger Federer

Roger Federer he said someone who listens

he said someone who listens

he said someone who listens then I asked one of the best tennis

then I asked one of the best tennis

then I asked one of the best tennis coaches in the world in Judy Murray she

coaches in the world in Judy Murray she

coaches in the world in Judy Murray she said someone who listens and then

said someone who listens and then

said someone who listens and then earlier this year I asked Serena

earlier this year I asked Serena

earlier this year I asked Serena Williams’s coach Patrick Mouratoglou he

Williams’s coach Patrick Mouratoglou he

Williams’s coach Patrick Mouratoglou he said someone who listens correct and

said someone who listens correct and

said someone who listens correct and then he delved deeper and said you have

then he delved deeper and said you have

then he delved deeper and said you have to be able to hear what the player is

to be able to hear what the player is

to be able to hear what the player is thinking now this really validated my

thinking now this really validated my

thinking now this really validated my own thoughts feelings and experiences

own thoughts feelings and experiences

own thoughts feelings and experiences because when we listen really listen we

because when we listen really listen we

because when we listen really listen we start to engage we begin to understand

start to engage we begin to understand

start to engage we begin to understand the players map of the world the energy

the players map of the world the energy

the players map of the world the energy PS that is guiding them and this is

PS that is guiding them and this is

PS that is guiding them and this is particularly important when we’re

particularly important when we’re

particularly important when we’re dealing with female players because if

dealing with female players because if

dealing with female players because if you can chin into their wavelength or

you can chin into their wavelength or

you can chin into their wavelength or perhaps their Spotify playlist then you

perhaps their Spotify playlist then you

perhaps their Spotify playlist then you have hope of building authentic trusting

have hope of building authentic trusting

have hope of building authentic trusting relationships in fact listening is the

relationships in fact listening is the

relationships in fact listening is the tipping point

tipping point

tipping point so having tapped into this enormous

so having tapped into this enormous

so having tapped into this enormous reserve of energy we have a

reserve of energy we have a

reserve of energy we have a responsibility to harness its potential

responsibility to harness its potential

responsibility to harness its potential how do we do this

how do we do this

how do we do this what did great cultures do they use

what did great cultures do they use

what did great cultures do they use empowering language because language

empowering language because language

empowering language because language matters the words we choose the comments

matters the words we choose the comments

matters the words we choose the comments we make whether consciously or

we make whether consciously or

we make whether consciously or subconsciously impact the strength of

subconsciously impact the strength of

subconsciously impact the strength of the player’s private inner voice

the player’s private inner voice

the player’s private inner voice especially under pressure and it’s not

especially under pressure and it’s not

especially under pressure and it’s not surprising that in the teenage years we

surprising that in the teenage years we

surprising that in the teenage years we know from neuroscience that the brain is

know from neuroscience that the brain is

know from neuroscience that the brain is undergoing intense and inevitable change

consequently the teenage years are

consequently the teenage years are turbulent hypersensitive and emotionally

turbulent hypersensitive and emotionally

turbulent hypersensitive and emotionally demanding and in my experience as the

demanding and in my experience as the

demanding and in my experience as the Australian junior fed cup captain I

Australian junior fed cup captain I

Australian junior fed cup captain I would often ask my young female players

would often ask my young female players

would often ask my young female players who tell me what

who tell me what

who tell me what your strengths they would go straight to

your strengths they would go straight to

your strengths they would go straight to their perceived weaknesses struggled

their perceived weaknesses struggled

their perceived weaknesses struggled with articulated air strength or look to

with articulated air strength or look to

with articulated air strength or look to mom or dad or coach for the magic answer

mom or dad or coach for the magic answer

mom or dad or coach for the magic answer and unfortunately all too often I hear

and unfortunately all too often I hear

and unfortunately all too often I hear coaches focus on the past

coaches focus on the past

coaches focus on the past after a negative match or an experience

after a negative match or an experience

after a negative match or an experience and this serves only to reinforce

and this serves only to reinforce

and this serves only to reinforce habitual patterns of negative thoughts

habitual patterns of negative thoughts

habitual patterns of negative thoughts and I was guilty of this too when I was

and I was guilty of this too when I was

and I was guilty of this too when I was a young coach instead girls want praise

a young coach instead girls want praise

a young coach instead girls want praise where praise is due they want feedback

where praise is due they want feedback

where praise is due they want feedback where feedback is due and great coaches

where feedback is due and great coaches

where feedback is due and great coaches do this by observing the past focusing

do this by observing the past focusing

do this by observing the past focusing on asking a future based question

on asking a future based question

on asking a future based question returning to the present to deliver

returning to the present to deliver

returning to the present to deliver execute and repeat let me let me share a

execute and repeat let me let me share a

execute and repeat let me let me share a classic coaching example of this so

classic coaching example of this so

classic coaching example of this so where rattling in cross court and all of

where rattling in cross court and all of

where rattling in cross court and all of a sudden there’s an error as I try to

a sudden there’s an error as I try to

a sudden there’s an error as I try to change direction of the ball down the

change direction of the ball down the

change direction of the ball down the line now if you ask a past base question

line now if you ask a past base question

line now if you ask a past base question what happened there why’d you miss that

what happened there why’d you miss that

what happened there why’d you miss that ball she will give you a highly accurate

ball she will give you a highly accurate

ball she will give you a highly accurate list of everything that went wrong oh

list of everything that went wrong oh

list of everything that went wrong oh yeah well I made my decision later I

yeah well I made my decision later I

yeah well I made my decision later I shifted my head I was off balance and

shifted my head I was off balance and

shifted my head I was off balance and the list goes on however if you ask a

the list goes on however if you ask a

the list goes on however if you ask a future based question next time you had

future based question next time you had

future based question next time you had that same ball what are you going to do

that same ball what are you going to do

that same ball what are you going to do differently what other options are

differently what other options are

differently what other options are possible through repetition this will

possible through repetition this will

possible through repetition this will empower her private inner voice and

empower her private inner voice and

empower her private inner voice and really strengthen her with comments such

really strengthen her with comments such

really strengthen her with comments such as next time I’ll turn my shoulders next

as next time I’ll turn my shoulders next

as next time I’ll turn my shoulders next time I’ll be more on balance this serves

time I’ll be more on balance this serves

time I’ll be more on balance this serves to strengthen the private inner voice

to strengthen the private inner voice

to strengthen the private inner voice builds self-esteem allows for

builds self-esteem allows for

builds self-esteem allows for accountability and enables the student

accountability and enables the student

accountability and enables the student to find the strengths that live within

to find the strengths that live within

to find the strengths that live within you see the words we choose impact and

you see the words we choose impact and

you see the words we choose impact and mold the brains neuroplasticity they are

mold the brains neuroplasticity they are

mold the brains neuroplasticity they are critical in building new brain Maps

critical in building new brain Maps

critical in building new brain Maps especially in these teenage years and

especially in these teenage years and

especially in these teenage years and let me share a story to illustrate this

let me share a story to illustrate this

let me share a story to illustrate this so a student of the game comes to me and

so a student of the game comes to me and

so a student of the game comes to me and she says can you look at my serve I said

she says can you look at my serve I said

she says can you look at my serve I said sure it looks something like this okay

sure it looks something like this okay

sure it looks something like this okay I’ll show you that again

and she goes I know I know coach I know

and she goes I know I know coach I know what you’re going to say you’re going to

what you’re going to say you’re going to

what you’re going to say you’re going to tell me that I’ve got a hitch on my

tell me that I’ve got a hitch on my

tell me that I’ve got a hitch on my serve

serve

serve like I get stuck here right you’re gonna

like I get stuck here right you’re gonna

like I get stuck here right you’re gonna tell me that yeah many coaches have told

tell me that yeah many coaches have told

tell me that yeah many coaches have told me this before well first of all I

me this before well first of all I

me this before well first of all I thought well is that interesting years

thought well is that interesting years

thought well is that interesting years of that negative reinforcement and I

of that negative reinforcement and I

of that negative reinforcement and I just simply said what if you were to

just simply said what if you were to

just simply said what if you were to spread your wings what if you just let

spread your wings what if you just let

spread your wings what if you just let gravity do the work for you

gravity do the work for you

gravity do the work for you just like gravity do the work for you

just like gravity do the work for you

just like gravity do the work for you now little did I realize she had felt

now little did I realize she had felt

now little did I realize she had felt stuck in a number of areas of her life

stuck in a number of areas of her life

stuck in a number of areas of her life not necessarily related to tennis but it

not necessarily related to tennis but it

not necessarily related to tennis but it was only on her terms through repetition

was only on her terms through repetition

was only on her terms through repetition that she felt ready to let go all the

that she felt ready to let go all the

that she felt ready to let go all the coaching experience did was provide an

coaching experience did was provide an

coaching experience did was provide an environment to listen to engage through

environment to listen to engage through

environment to listen to engage through using empowering language that enabled

using empowering language that enabled

using empowering language that enabled the student to find the answers that

the student to find the answers that

the student to find the answers that live within herself we have a golden

live within herself we have a golden

live within herself we have a golden opportunity to begin to restore the

opportunity to begin to restore the

opportunity to begin to restore the balance it is time to remove the

balance it is time to remove the

balance it is time to remove the blindfold from Lady Justice so that we

blindfold from Lady Justice so that we

blindfold from Lady Justice so that we all might hear and see clearly a way

all might hear and see clearly a way

all might hear and see clearly a way forward I am in tennis I am a coach I

forward I am in tennis I am a coach I

forward I am in tennis I am a coach I might discover the next world champion

might discover the next world champion

might discover the next world champion or I might not but here’s what I do know

or I might not but here’s what I do know

or I might not but here’s what I do know if we can all play our part in creating

if we can all play our part in creating

if we can all play our part in creating opportunities to engage in empower women

opportunities to engage in empower women

opportunities to engage in empower women and young females then they will have

and young females then they will have

and young females then they will have the self belief that they can make a

the self belief that they can make a

the self belief that they can make a wonderful contribution on and off the

wonderful contribution on and off the

wonderful contribution on and off the court

court

court so I will leave you with this thought

so I will leave you with this thought

so I will leave you with this thought next time when dealing with young

next time when dealing with young

next time when dealing with young females in your life

females in your life

females in your life how would you unleash their imprisoned

how would you unleash their imprisoned

how would you unleash their imprisoned energy and harness their potential

energy and harness their potential

energy and harness their potential because the ball is in your court

”

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