well I’m vote and I have a laboratory and I call it a laboratory of life it’s
and I call it a laboratory of life it’s
and I call it a laboratory of life it’s the Colette’s about a health and I am
the Colette’s about a health and I am
the Colette’s about a health and I am fascinated by people I’m fascinated by
fascinated by people I’m fascinated by
fascinated by people I’m fascinated by our ability to surpass ourselves and I
our ability to surpass ourselves and I
our ability to surpass ourselves and I walk around with questions like why do
walk around with questions like why do
walk around with questions like why do we all crave connection while we find it
we all crave connection while we find it
we all crave connection while we find it so hard to open up and why do we so
so hard to open up and why do we so
so hard to open up and why do we so often know what we should do and then
often know what we should do and then
often know what we should do and then not do it and why do I so often feel
not do it and why do I so often feel
not do it and why do I so often feel like I’m not a new not good enough well
well I was I was a professional pole
well I was I was a professional pole vaulter and at some point I was the
vaulter and at some point I was the
vaulter and at some point I was the number one in the country and I had a
number one in the country and I had a
number one in the country and I had a dream I was going to take part in the
dream I was going to take part in the
dream I was going to take part in the Olympics and I had worked for this my
Olympics and I had worked for this my
Olympics and I had worked for this my whole life
whole life
whole life I had good results and I had a strong
I had good results and I had a strong
I had good results and I had a strong team of coaches of sponsors and fans and
team of coaches of sponsors and fans and
team of coaches of sponsors and fans and I had a beautiful girlfriend beside me
I had a beautiful girlfriend beside me
I had a beautiful girlfriend beside me and I always I had a unique story to
and I always I had a unique story to
and I always I had a unique story to tell and I felt strong I felt good and I
tell and I felt strong I felt good and I
tell and I felt strong I felt good and I loved it but right before the Olympics
loved it but right before the Olympics
loved it but right before the Olympics in 2008 I heavily injured myself I
in 2008 I heavily injured myself I
in 2008 I heavily injured myself I couldn’t jump for one whole year and
couldn’t jump for one whole year and
couldn’t jump for one whole year and this moment has changed everything for
this moment has changed everything for
this moment has changed everything for me
me
me when I could jump again I couldn’t live
when I could jump again I couldn’t live
when I could jump again I couldn’t live up to all the expectations
aye-aye-aye aye-aye-aye thought I
aye-aye-aye aye-aye-aye thought I thought I wasn’t good enough I couldn’t
thought I wasn’t good enough I couldn’t
thought I wasn’t good enough I couldn’t live up to all the expectations and now
live up to all the expectations and now
live up to all the expectations and now I lost my lines I’m sorry I’m also
I lost my lines I’m sorry I’m also
I lost my lines I’m sorry I’m also afraid that it would this would happen
afraid that it would this would happen
afraid that it would this would happen I’m sorry
I’m sorry
I’m sorry thank you well this is where my talk is
thank you well this is where my talk is
thank you well this is where my talk is about I have to – well I was always
about I have to – well I was always
about I have to – well I was always afraid what the people thought of me I
afraid what the people thought of me I
afraid what the people thought of me I was I believed I truly believed that I
was I believed I truly believed that I
was I believed I truly believed that I only was somebody when I achieve so I
only was somebody when I achieve so I
only was somebody when I achieve so I was always busy achieving and and and I
was always busy achieving and and and I
was always busy achieving and and and I I slowly started to forget how much fun
I slowly started to forget how much fun
I slowly started to forget how much fun the pole-vaulting was and I remember in
the pole-vaulting was and I remember in
the pole-vaulting was and I remember in 2012 I was I was in this stadium filled
2012 I was I was in this stadium filled
2012 I was I was in this stadium filled with 15,000 people and I was sitting
with 15,000 people and I was sitting
with 15,000 people and I was sitting there on a bench in the field and I
there on a bench in the field and I
there on a bench in the field and I looked around me and I and I felt more
looked around me and I and I felt more
looked around me and I and I felt more lonely than I ever did before I was
lonely than I ever did before I was
lonely than I ever did before I was ashamed of who I was at that moment and
ashamed of who I was at that moment and
ashamed of who I was at that moment and after this competition I decided to quit
after this competition I decided to quit
after this competition I decided to quit and when I quit I felt liberated huh III
and when I quit I felt liberated huh III
and when I quit I felt liberated huh III I lost the feeling of having to perform
I lost the feeling of having to perform
I lost the feeling of having to perform the whole time and I started doing all
the whole time and I started doing all
the whole time and I started doing all the things I couldn’t do as a
the things I couldn’t do as a
the things I couldn’t do as a professional athlete girls I went to
professional athlete girls I went to
professional athlete girls I went to parties lots of alcohol lots of alcohol
parties lots of alcohol lots of alcohol
parties lots of alcohol lots of alcohol and I was offered a good job by one of
and I was offered a good job by one of
and I was offered a good job by one of my sponsor companies much for old
my sponsor companies much for old
my sponsor companies much for old sponsor companies and as soon as I
sponsor companies and as soon as I
sponsor companies and as soon as I started there this feeling of not enough
started there this feeling of not enough
started there this feeling of not enough came back to me
came back to me
came back to me and it started to either eat away at me
and it started to either eat away at me
and it started to either eat away at me and this is when I started my laboratory
and this is when I started my laboratory
and this is when I started my laboratory I needed to understand what life was
I needed to understand what life was
I needed to understand what life was about why did I feel so much anxiety and
about why did I feel so much anxiety and
about why did I feel so much anxiety and so much insecurity the whole time so I
so much insecurity the whole time so I
so much insecurity the whole time so I started watching loads of TED Talks
started watching loads of TED Talks
started watching loads of TED Talks III read articles and books about
III read articles and books about
III read articles and books about self-development and I surrounded myself
self-development and I surrounded myself
self-development and I surrounded myself with like-minded people I found a mentor
with like-minded people I found a mentor
with like-minded people I found a mentor and I bought a camera and I started to
and I bought a camera and I started to
and I bought a camera and I started to interview if I started asking questions
interview if I started asking questions
interview if I started asking questions about life to hundreds of people on the
about life to hundreds of people on the
about life to hundreds of people on the streets and I interviewed famous people
streets and I interviewed famous people
streets and I interviewed famous people I interviewed successful people type
I interviewed successful people type
I interviewed successful people type psychologists basically everybody and my
psychologists basically everybody and my
psychologists basically everybody and my favorite question was what have you
favorite question was what have you
favorite question was what have you learned from life so far Marcel
learned from life so far Marcel
learned from life so far Marcel the vision look is it fun look she’s
the vision look is it fun look she’s
the vision look is it fun look she’s duflot for watch all things actually I
duflot for watch all things actually I
duflot for watch all things actually I think yeah it’s the black comedy show
think yeah it’s the black comedy show
think yeah it’s the black comedy show after shame and she’d hit on my mic I’m
after shame and she’d hit on my mic I’m
after shame and she’d hit on my mic I’m gonna say off the ding of me I would say
gonna say off the ding of me I would say
gonna say off the ding of me I would say every hero is vulnerable in some way or
every hero is vulnerable in some way or
every hero is vulnerable in some way or another and I guess you could say I mean
another and I guess you could say I mean
another and I guess you could say I mean water bowl is here oh well at some point
water bowl is here oh well at some point
water bowl is here oh well at some point people around me went crazy with all of
people around me went crazy with all of
people around me went crazy with all of my questions but I started to see this
my questions but I started to see this
my questions but I started to see this pattern I started to look at life like I
pattern I started to look at life like I
pattern I started to look at life like I said if it’s a journey with full of
said if it’s a journey with full of
said if it’s a journey with full of challenges in which we we we can accept
challenges in which we we we can accept
challenges in which we we we can accept accept those challenges and we fight or
accept those challenges and we fight or
accept those challenges and we fight or we run away and my pattern was to run
we run away and my pattern was to run
we run away and my pattern was to run away i I was wearing a mask often and I
away i I was wearing a mask often and I
away i I was wearing a mask often and I I tried to be someone I was not I
I tried to be someone I was not I
I tried to be someone I was not I avoided all this difficult situation
avoided all this difficult situation
avoided all this difficult situation just because I was afraid that people
just because I was afraid that people
just because I was afraid that people would reject me that I wouldn’t be good
would reject me that I wouldn’t be good
would reject me that I wouldn’t be good enough and what I saw the last couple of
enough and what I saw the last couple of
enough and what I saw the last couple of years is that I’m not the only one
years is that I’m not the only one
years is that I’m not the only one struggling with this loads of people are
struggling with this loads of people are
struggling with this loads of people are struggling with this but the lessons I
struggling with this but the lessons I
struggling with this but the lessons I learned in my laboratory told me that
learned in my laboratory told me that
learned in my laboratory told me that you can’t run away from yourself yeah
you can’t run away from yourself yeah
you can’t run away from yourself yeah you can but you will never find
you can but you will never find
you can but you will never find fulfillment the lessons told me the real
fulfillment the lessons told me the real
fulfillment the lessons told me the real solution lies within yourself within
solution lies within yourself within
solution lies within yourself within these confrontations and and and and and
these confrontations and and and and and
these confrontations and and and and and you can’t you wouldn’t come
you can’t you wouldn’t come
you can’t you wouldn’t come winning these confrontations and okay
winning these confrontations and okay
winning these confrontations and okay and I’m sorry I lost it again
and I’m sorry I lost it again
and I’m sorry I lost it again so you have to start listening to your
so you have to start listening to your
so you have to start listening to your inner call to adventure to your inner
inner call to adventure to your inner
inner call to adventure to your inner voice whatever that meant well I
voice whatever that meant well I
voice whatever that meant well I remember I was once spent 24 hours with
remember I was once spent 24 hours with
remember I was once spent 24 hours with a 62 year old pastor just to get Miguel
a 62 year old pastor just to get Miguel
a 62 year old pastor just to get Miguel to find inspiration and he told me about
to find inspiration and he told me about
to find inspiration and he told me about life like like it was an onion in the
life like like it was an onion in the
life like like it was an onion in the core is who you are and to get there you
core is who you are and to get there you
core is who you are and to get there you have to develop yourself
have to develop yourself
have to develop yourself you have to unwind the onion and it can
you have to unwind the onion and it can
you have to unwind the onion and it can take an entire lifetime to get there
take an entire lifetime to get there
take an entire lifetime to get there well what I believe that he meant with
well what I believe that he meant with
well what I believe that he meant with this is that there’s a lot of things
this is that there’s a lot of things
this is that there’s a lot of things inside of us that we don’t know about
inside of us that we don’t know about
inside of us that we don’t know about ourselves yet or we don’t want to see or
ourselves yet or we don’t want to see or
ourselves yet or we don’t want to see or we don’t want to show to other people so
we don’t want to show to other people so
we don’t want to show to other people so any solution was we had to take if I had
any solution was we had to take if I had
any solution was we had to take if I had to take an honest look at myself and
to take an honest look at myself and
to take an honest look at myself and stop denying the things that I see so I
stop denying the things that I see so I
stop denying the things that I see so I had to find a way to start listening to
had to find a way to start listening to
had to find a way to start listening to myself better well I remember I took
myself better well I remember I took
myself better well I remember I took part in this this experience organized
part in this this experience organized
part in this this experience organized by I an aerco and it was about self
by I an aerco and it was about self
by I an aerco and it was about self exploration you might know re an aerco
exploration you might know re an aerco
exploration you might know re an aerco he has been taken hostage for 600 seven
he has been taken hostage for 600 seven
he has been taken hostage for 600 seven days in Dagestan in 2002 and this day I
days in Dagestan in 2002 and this day I
days in Dagestan in 2002 and this day I had to sit in jail for a full day barely
had to sit in jail for a full day barely
had to sit in jail for a full day barely any food no phone no people around me
any food no phone no people around me
any food no phone no people around me just me myself and I and after a couple
just me myself and I and after a couple
just me myself and I and after a couple of hours after a couple of hours of
of hours after a couple of hours of
of hours after a couple of hours of sitting still and walking back and forth
sitting still and walking back and forth
sitting still and walking back and forth I received an envelope and within this
I received an envelope and within this
I received an envelope and within this envelope were two questions the first
envelope were two questions the first
envelope were two questions the first question was what is it that’s keeping
question was what is it that’s keeping
question was what is it that’s keeping you hostage in life so what is it that’s
you hostage in life so what is it that’s
you hostage in life so what is it that’s keeping you hostage in life is it a role
keeping you hostage in life is it a role
keeping you hostage in life is it a role at work that doesn’t fit you
at work that doesn’t fit you
at work that doesn’t fit you is it your perfectionism is it that you
is it your perfectionism is it that you
is it your perfectionism is it that you are afraid to to to have an honest
are afraid to to to have an honest
are afraid to to to have an honest conversation with someone is it the
conversation with someone is it the
conversation with someone is it the dreams you don’t chase is it your fear
dreams you don’t chase is it your fear
dreams you don’t chase is it your fear of failure well and the second question
of failure well and the second question
of failure well and the second question was how are you going to free yourself
was how are you going to free yourself
was how are you going to free yourself of this well what I found out seeing
of this well what I found out seeing
of this well what I found out seeing what it is see looking at yourself and
what it is see looking at yourself and
what it is see looking at yourself and seeing what it is is it’s maybe the
seeing what it is is it’s maybe the
seeing what it is is it’s maybe the hardest part of it all what you see and
hardest part of it all what you see and
hardest part of it all what you see and what I wrote down were things like my my
what I wrote down were things like my my
what I wrote down were things like my my father who was like the best man in the
father who was like the best man in the
father who was like the best man in the world I love this this man but he’s he
world I love this this man but he’s he
world I love this this man but he’s he always speaks the truth and I don’t want
always speaks the truth and I don’t want
always speaks the truth and I don’t want to disappoint my father what I wrote
to disappoint my father what I wrote
to disappoint my father what I wrote down were was was the the fear that that
down were was was the the fear that that
down were was was the the fear that that that that that I would be dead I am
that that that I would be dead I am
that that that I would be dead I am different and the idea that
different and the idea that
different and the idea that people expect me to always be
people expect me to always be
people expect me to always be enthusiastic and to always be happy well
enthusiastic and to always be happy well
enthusiastic and to always be happy well the thing is if you start to take a look
the thing is if you start to take a look
the thing is if you start to take a look at yourself the things you see this is
at yourself the things you see this is
at yourself the things you see this is who you are
who you are
who you are those things are who is who you are and
those things are who is who you are and
those things are who is who you are and if you deny what what lives inside of
if you deny what what lives inside of
if you deny what what lives inside of you if you deny it or you avoid it
you if you deny it or you avoid it
you if you deny it or you avoid it you’re basically rejecting yourself
you’re basically rejecting yourself
you’re basically rejecting yourself you’re saying to yourself that what I
you’re saying to yourself that what I
you’re saying to yourself that what I feel inside is not enough and I walk
feel inside is not enough and I walk
feel inside is not enough and I walk away from it
away from it
away from it so to start listening what it is you see
so to start listening what it is you see
so to start listening what it is you see is an accepting what you see is one but
is an accepting what you see is one but
is an accepting what you see is one but do you also accept the challenge that
do you also accept the challenge that
do you also accept the challenge that comes with it or well I do well so what
comes with it or well I do well so what
comes with it or well I do well so what I learned is that you do to free
I learned is that you do to free
I learned is that you do to free yourself you have to confront those
yourself you have to confront those
yourself you have to confront those fears does this discomfort and with
fears does this discomfort and with
fears does this discomfort and with confrontation I mean that you that you
confrontation I mean that you that you
confrontation I mean that you that you you do the things you actually believe
you do the things you actually believe
you do the things you actually believe you should do and be open and honest
you should do and be open and honest
you should do and be open and honest about your intentions you have to be
about your intentions you have to be
about your intentions you have to be honest about your intentions raw pure
honest about your intentions raw pure
honest about your intentions raw pure rough vulnerability and I believe I
rough vulnerability and I believe I
rough vulnerability and I believe I really do believe this is a choice you
really do believe this is a choice you
really do believe this is a choice you can make whether do you show who you are
can make whether do you show who you are
can make whether do you show who you are or do you hide do you run away well and
or do you hide do you run away well and
or do you hide do you run away well and this is difficult this makes you
this is difficult this makes you
this is difficult this makes you vulnerable but this is what my
vulnerable but this is what my
vulnerable but this is what my laboratory is about every time I feel
laboratory is about every time I feel
laboratory is about every time I feel this fear I feel this discomfort I try
this fear I feel this discomfort I try
this fear I feel this discomfort I try to look at it and to see what what I
to look at it and to see what what I
to look at it and to see what what I really feel feels feel is right and I do
really feel feels feel is right and I do
really feel feels feel is right and I do take the action that I believe is
take the action that I believe is
take the action that I believe is necessary and it’s hard every time but
necessary and it’s hard every time but
necessary and it’s hard every time but what what happens is is truly magic it’s
what what happens is is truly magic it’s
what what happens is is truly magic it’s magic what happens and and for some some
magic what happens and and for some some
magic what happens and and for some some examples well I told my father that
examples well I told my father that
examples well I told my father that about the fact that he made me feel
about the fact that he made me feel
about the fact that he made me feel imprisoned and instead of him being
imprisoned and instead of him being
imprisoned and instead of him being disappointed
disappointed
disappointed he told me he was proud of me and and
he told me he was proud of me and and
he told me he was proud of me and and and I remember one time I didn’t have
and I remember one time I didn’t have
and I remember one time I didn’t have any money I was I was a pure panic and I
any money I was I was a pure panic and I
any money I was I was a pure panic and I had to ask my best friend and I was
had to ask my best friend and I was
had to ask my best friend and I was ashamed of the fact I couldn’t save
ashamed of the fact I couldn’t save
ashamed of the fact I couldn’t save myself and I asked him and instead of
myself and I asked him and instead of
myself and I asked him and instead of him being it instead of him saying no he
him being it instead of him saying no he
him being it instead of him saying no he was glad he could help me and I remember
was glad he could help me and I remember
was glad he could help me and I remember after a couple of days with a girl I
after a couple of days with a girl I
after a couple of days with a girl I went home with her for the first time
went home with her for the first time
went home with her for the first time and I felt pressure because I thought I
and I felt pressure because I thought I
and I felt pressure because I thought I had to make a move and I decided to open
had to make a move and I decided to open
had to make a move and I decided to open up about it and it liberated us because
up about it and it liberated us because
up about it and it liberated us because she felt the same and this keeps on
she felt the same and this keeps on
she felt the same and this keeps on happening every time like magic in our
happening every time like magic in our
happening every time like magic in our areas in my life and before I would run
areas in my life and before I would run
areas in my life and before I would run away I would avoid this situation but
away I would avoid this situation but
away I would avoid this situation but now I now I do it and and every time
now I now I do it and and every time
now I now I do it and and every time something happens so I found out it is
something happens so I found out it is
something happens so I found out it is it is sincerity connects people it
it is sincerity connects people it
it is sincerity connects people it connects people so and no it doesn’t
connects people so and no it doesn’t
connects people so and no it doesn’t always work it’s not a trick sometimes
always work it’s not a trick sometimes
always work it’s not a trick sometimes you fail but those turn out to be the
you fail but those turn out to be the
you fail but those turn out to be the strongest moment of growth so what is
strongest moment of growth so what is
strongest moment of growth so what is the treasure I found the treasure I
the treasure I found the treasure I
the treasure I found the treasure I found is that by being loyal with myself
found is that by being loyal with myself
found is that by being loyal with myself by doing the things that I actually
by doing the things that I actually
by doing the things that I actually believed that are right that makes me
believed that are right that makes me
believed that are right that makes me trust myself this is what makes me trust
trust myself this is what makes me trust
trust myself this is what makes me trust myself and makes my confidence grow and
myself and makes my confidence grow and
myself and makes my confidence grow and every time I show up and with all of my
every time I show up and with all of my
every time I show up and with all of my imperfections with everything that’s not
imperfections with everything that’s not
imperfections with everything that’s not good not right about me it turns out
good not right about me it turns out
good not right about me it turns out that it is enough I am enough and you
that it is enough I am enough and you
that it is enough I am enough and you are enough well and the second thing is
are enough well and the second thing is
are enough well and the second thing is at the same time my relationship with a
at the same time my relationship with a
at the same time my relationship with a relationship start growing because
relationship start growing because
relationship start growing because because when you when you be real you
because when you when you be real you
because when you when you be real you drop your mask people connect with you
drop your mask people connect with you
drop your mask people connect with you because they recognize themselves in you
because they recognize themselves in you
because they recognize themselves in you because we all struggle with the same
because we all struggle with the same
because we all struggle with the same things we all struggle with the same
things we all struggle with the same
things we all struggle with the same things and besides that if you drop your
things and besides that if you drop your
things and besides that if you drop your mask how you give the other one
mask how you give the other one
mask how you give the other one permission to drop their mask as well
permission to drop their mask as well
permission to drop their mask as well and this is what connects you don’t need
and this is what connects you don’t need
and this is what connects you don’t need a mask anymore
a mask anymore
a mask anymore so to end with I would like to to invite
so to end with I would like to to invite
so to end with I would like to to invite you all to start your own laboratory and
you all to start your own laboratory and
you all to start your own laboratory and start listening tour due to your call to
start listening tour due to your call to
start listening tour due to your call to adventure what is it that really
adventure what is it that really
adventure what is it that really inside of you and accept what it is and
inside of you and accept what it is and
inside of you and accept what it is and challenge it fight fail get up again and
challenge it fight fail get up again and
challenge it fight fail get up again and find the treasure you are looking for
find the treasure you are looking for
find the treasure you are looking for and this is what I learned from life so
and this is what I learned from life so
and this is what I learned from life so far thank you
far thank you
far thank you [Music]
”
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