The beauty of surrender | Kirsten Swensen | TEDxEindhoven

mirror mirror on the wall who is the

mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest of them all I think you all know

fairest of them all I think you all know

fairest of them all I think you all know this quote right

this quote right

this quote right it’s from the famous snow-white fairy

it’s from the famous snow-white fairy

it’s from the famous snow-white fairy tale but in reality this quote actually

tale but in reality this quote actually

tale but in reality this quote actually is a very deep and profound meaning what

is a very deep and profound meaning what

is a very deep and profound meaning what if I told you that you are surrounded by

if I told you that you are surrounded by

if I told you that you are surrounded by countless invisible mirrors every day

countless invisible mirrors every day

countless invisible mirrors every day and what if I told you that you are not

and what if I told you that you are not

and what if I told you that you are not always who you think you are since the

always who you think you are since the

always who you think you are since the rise of social media we became more

rise of social media we became more

rise of social media we became more self-conscious as a society than ever

self-conscious as a society than ever

self-conscious as a society than ever before on a single photo we try to judge

before on a single photo we try to judge

before on a single photo we try to judge whether someone can potentially be the

whether someone can potentially be the

whether someone can potentially be the love of our lives and we endlessly tap

love of our lives and we endlessly tap

love of our lives and we endlessly tap those like buttons but what do we

those like buttons but what do we

those like buttons but what do we actually see and who do we actually see

actually see and who do we actually see

actually see and who do we actually see striving for comfort and approval seems

striving for comfort and approval seems

striving for comfort and approval seems to be the main goal it’s almost like we

to be the main goal it’s almost like we

to be the main goal it’s almost like we equate comfort and approval for

equate comfort and approval for

equate comfort and approval for happiness but once we don’t get that

happiness but once we don’t get that

happiness but once we don’t get that continuous approval you reject the

continuous approval you reject the

continuous approval you reject the anxiety that may arise because we tell

anxiety that may arise because we tell

anxiety that may arise because we tell ourselves something is wrong if we don’t

ourselves something is wrong if we don’t

ourselves something is wrong if we don’t always feel good enough beautiful enough

always feel good enough beautiful enough

always feel good enough beautiful enough adequate enough the reason I’m

adequate enough the reason I’m

adequate enough the reason I’m mentioning this is because for a long

mentioning this is because for a long

mentioning this is because for a long time I was the person I was that girl

time I was the person I was that girl

time I was the person I was that girl who was endlessly comparing herself when

who was endlessly comparing herself when

who was endlessly comparing herself when things weren’t always going her way but

things weren’t always going her way but

things weren’t always going her way but the reason I’m standing here today is

the reason I’m standing here today is

the reason I’m standing here today is because I want to share with you my

because I want to share with you my

because I want to share with you my personal story of how my suffering led

personal story of how my suffering led

personal story of how my suffering led to questioning my own self-image and

to questioning my own self-image and

to questioning my own self-image and which opened the path for true healing

which opened the path for true healing

which opened the path for true healing well in order to do that I’m going to

well in order to do that I’m going to

well in order to do that I’m going to take you back to my younger self you see

take you back to my younger self you see

take you back to my younger self you see my younger self loved taking selfies

my younger self loved taking selfies

my younger self loved taking selfies growing up as a teenager in this

growing up as a teenager in this

growing up as a teenager in this generation social media wasn’t strange

generation social media wasn’t strange

generation social media wasn’t strange to me and like any other girl I had many

to me and like any other girl I had many

to me and like any other girl I had many insecurities I was often occupied but

insecurities I was often occupied but

insecurities I was often occupied but what other people would think of me and

what other people would think of me and

what other people would think of me and when I would feel good about myself I

when I would feel good about myself I

when I would feel good about myself I would post a selfie but also and even

would post a selfie but also and even

would post a selfie but also and even more so when I would feel sad and you

more so when I would feel sad and you

more so when I would feel sad and you know why

know why

know why because I knew I was getting the

because I knew I was getting the

because I knew I was getting the approval I was looking for and before I

approval I was looking for and before I

approval I was looking for and before I knew it I was addicted to approval even

knew it I was addicted to approval even

knew it I was addicted to approval even though my younger self couldn’t

though my younger self couldn’t

though my younger self couldn’t rationally understand what was happening

rationally understand what was happening

rationally understand what was happening on a deeper level I was starting to feel

on a deeper level I was starting to feel

on a deeper level I was starting to feel discrepancy between what I showed to the

discrepancy between what I showed to the

discrepancy between what I showed to the outside world and how I really felt from

outside world and how I really felt from

outside world and how I really felt from inside it felt like I was wearing this

inside it felt like I was wearing this

inside it felt like I was wearing this mask and even worse I felt trapped in it

mask and even worse I felt trapped in it

mask and even worse I felt trapped in it I became a prisoner of my own need for

I became a prisoner of my own need for

I became a prisoner of my own need for approval and I turned it to a

approval and I turned it to a

approval and I turned it to a perfectionist my suffering actually grew

perfectionist my suffering actually grew

perfectionist my suffering actually grew so deep that it cost me to have a

so deep that it cost me to have a

so deep that it cost me to have a burnout in just my early 20s I never

burnout in just my early 20s I never

burnout in just my early 20s I never forget this moment I was laying on the

forget this moment I was laying on the

forget this moment I was laying on the floor of my bedroom thinking how dare I

floor of my bedroom thinking how dare I

floor of my bedroom thinking how dare I worry about what other people think of

worry about what other people think of

worry about what other people think of me when there are people out there dying

me when there are people out there dying

me when there are people out there dying from starvation and war and I was

from starvation and war and I was

from starvation and war and I was worried about my self-image I felt

worried about my self-image I felt

worried about my self-image I felt ashamed and when I thought I couldn’t

ashamed and when I thought I couldn’t

ashamed and when I thought I couldn’t sink any lower

sink any lower

sink any lower a voice popped up in my mind saying who

a voice popped up in my mind saying who

a voice popped up in my mind saying who are you really and what are you truly

are you really and what are you truly

are you really and what are you truly afraid of it would these questions that

afraid of it would these questions that

afraid of it would these questions that made me want to confront my fears even

made me want to confront my fears even

made me want to confront my fears even though I didn’t know how all I knew is

though I didn’t know how all I knew is

though I didn’t know how all I knew is that I wanted to take action and

that I wanted to take action and

that I wanted to take action and responsibility for the suffering I was

responsibility for the suffering I was

responsibility for the suffering I was feeling and this was the first step

feeling and this was the first step

feeling and this was the first step towards my healing little did I know

towards my healing little did I know

towards my healing little did I know that my real fears were about fear of

that my real fears were about fear of

that my real fears were about fear of being vulnerable the fear of rejection

being vulnerable the fear of rejection

being vulnerable the fear of rejection and the fear of not being good enough

during the time this was also happening

during the time this was also happening I was also attending art school and in

I was also attending art school and in

I was also attending art school and in art school I had the chance to actually

art school I had the chance to actually

art school I had the chance to actually express myself creatively ironically

express myself creatively ironically

express myself creatively ironically enough my fascinations were always

enough my fascinations were always

enough my fascinations were always evolving around the human body to me the

evolving around the human body to me the

evolving around the human body to me the human body was strange yet magical shell

human body was strange yet magical shell

human body was strange yet magical shell we lived in and it was slowly getting

we lived in and it was slowly getting

we lived in and it was slowly getting clear to me that the human body had a

clear to me that the human body had a

clear to me that the human body had a direct correlation between my search for

direct correlation between my search for

direct correlation between my search for identity and vulnerability so this led

identity and vulnerability so this led

identity and vulnerability so this led to the idea

to the idea

to the idea to put myself as a research object and

to put myself as a research object and

to put myself as a research object and to investigate my fears now I want you

to investigate my fears now I want you

to investigate my fears now I want you to imagine like you’re standing in a

to imagine like you’re standing in a

to imagine like you’re standing in a room naked with 20 strangers staring at

room naked with 20 strangers staring at

room naked with 20 strangers staring at you now I can tell you that it’s

you now I can tell you that it’s

you now I can tell you that it’s definitely awkward I thought it was a

definitely awkward I thought it was a

definitely awkward I thought it was a brilliant idea to become a nude model

brilliant idea to become a nude model

brilliant idea to become a nude model what seems scary at first was getting

what seems scary at first was getting

what seems scary at first was getting more and more comfortable but it felt

more and more comfortable but it felt

more and more comfortable but it felt like the right thing to do to expose

like the right thing to do to expose

like the right thing to do to expose myself like that so I decided to give up

myself like that so I decided to give up

myself like that so I decided to give up control and step out of my comfort zone

control and step out of my comfort zone

control and step out of my comfort zone but during my time as an OOP model I

but during my time as an OOP model I

but during my time as an OOP model I made some very interesting observations

made some very interesting observations

made some very interesting observations and insights that I want to share with

and insights that I want to share with

and insights that I want to share with you so the first one was perception I

you so the first one was perception I

you so the first one was perception I could clearly notice that the people who

could clearly notice that the people who

could clearly notice that the people who drew me perceive me very differently

drew me perceive me very differently

drew me perceive me very differently than I perceive myself and I was amazed

than I perceive myself and I was amazed

than I perceive myself and I was amazed by seeing so many different versions of

by seeing so many different versions of

by seeing so many different versions of myself it was actually very amusing of

myself it was actually very amusing of

myself it was actually very amusing of seeing myself going from an 8 year old

seeing myself going from an 8 year old

seeing myself going from an 8 year old lady back to a young girl and straight

lady back to a young girl and straight

lady back to a young girl and straight into this abstracted soonish figure in

into this abstracted soonish figure in

into this abstracted soonish figure in which I couldn’t even recognize myself

which I couldn’t even recognize myself

which I couldn’t even recognize myself at all now the second observation was

at all now the second observation was

at all now the second observation was direction I know right

direction I know right

direction I know right so normally I would never stand like

so normally I would never stand like

so normally I would never stand like this but I noticed that the

this but I noticed that the

this but I noticed that the photographers who took pictures of me at

photographers who took pictures of me at

photographers who took pictures of me at the tendency to direct my poses they

the tendency to direct my poses they

the tendency to direct my poses they would often ask me to look down or put

would often ask me to look down or put

would often ask me to look down or put my hands up in which this case I did it

my hands up in which this case I did it

my hands up in which this case I did it felt like there were certain

felt like there were certain

felt like there were certain expectations

expectations

expectations now the third observation was the most

now the third observation was the most

now the third observation was the most confronting one and that was judgement

confronting one and that was judgement

confronting one and that was judgement you see I stepped into his experience

you see I stepped into his experience

you see I stepped into his experience with the expectation of being judged

with the expectation of being judged

with the expectation of being judged only to realize that it was my own

only to realize that it was my own

only to realize that it was my own judgment and shame towards myself that

judgment and shame towards myself that

judgment and shame towards myself that was standing in between me and the

was standing in between me and the

was standing in between me and the others I was my own biggest judge and

others I was my own biggest judge and

others I was my own biggest judge and even though I gained so much more

even though I gained so much more

even though I gained so much more confidence about my body there I still

confidence about my body there I still

confidence about my body there I still had these questions like when are really

had these questions like when are really

had these questions like when are really vulnerable how can we embrace our

vulnerable how can we embrace our

vulnerable how can we embrace our vulnerabilities how do other people

vulnerabilities how do other people

vulnerabilities how do other people experience this

experience this

experience this this inspired me to start my own project

this inspired me to start my own project

this inspired me to start my own project instead of letting other people observe

instead of letting other people observe

instead of letting other people observe me I wanted to observe others but this

me I wanted to observe others but this

me I wanted to observe others but this time I wanted to do something different

time I wanted to do something different

time I wanted to do something different I wanted my photo sessions to be like an

I wanted my photo sessions to be like an

I wanted my photo sessions to be like an experience so the idea was to create a

experience so the idea was to create a

experience so the idea was to create a space where there was no room for

space where there was no room for

space where there was no room for judgment no directions no expectations

judgment no directions no expectations

judgment no directions no expectations just pure presence between me and the

just pure presence between me and the

just pure presence between me and the other person for me it was important

other person for me it was important

other person for me it was important that they were naked or at least in

that they were naked or at least in

that they were naked or at least in their underwear because for me being

their underwear because for me being

their underwear because for me being naked it’s like the most bad state a

naked it’s like the most bad state a

naked it’s like the most bad state a human can be in literally nothing to

human can be in literally nothing to

human can be in literally nothing to cover you up it wasn’t necessarily for

cover you up it wasn’t necessarily for

cover you up it wasn’t necessarily for me to capture their naked bodies more

me to capture their naked bodies more

me to capture their naked bodies more about the emotions and the feelings that

about the emotions and the feelings that

about the emotions and the feelings that would arise when being in this state so

would arise when being in this state so

would arise when being in this state so with this in mind I found some very

with this in mind I found some very

with this in mind I found some very brave and courageous people who were

brave and courageous people who were

brave and courageous people who were willing to participate and what happened

willing to participate and what happened

willing to participate and what happened next

next

next was amazing because I became the mirror

was amazing because I became the mirror

was amazing because I became the mirror I noticed that when observing them

I noticed that when observing them

I noticed that when observing them without judgment and without expectation

without judgment and without expectation

without judgment and without expectation this would often cause a great sense of

this would often cause a great sense of

this would often cause a great sense of discomfort and the silence I used during

discomfort and the silence I used during

discomfort and the silence I used during my photo sessions made it even worse I

my photo sessions made it even worse I

my photo sessions made it even worse I became the mirror on which they

became the mirror on which they

became the mirror on which they projected their own insecurities and I

projected their own insecurities and I

projected their own insecurities and I was very fascinated by their moments of

was very fascinated by their moments of

was very fascinated by their moments of inner reflection and abide their body

inner reflection and abide their body

inner reflection and abide their body language so I try to categorize these

language so I try to categorize these

language so I try to categorize these faces into tree types of faces now the

faces into tree types of faces now the

faces into tree types of faces now the first one is what I call the avoidance

first one is what I call the avoidance

first one is what I call the avoidance face here their bodies would often send

face here their bodies would often send

face here their bodies would often send me a subconscious message by putting

me a subconscious message by putting

me a subconscious message by putting their hands in front of their hearts or

their hands in front of their hearts or

their hands in front of their hearts or in front of their face because my models

in front of their face because my models

in front of their face because my models didn’t know what to expect I could often

didn’t know what to expect I could often

didn’t know what to expect I could often sense a fear of judgment in my models

sense a fear of judgment in my models

sense a fear of judgment in my models and it felt like there was a sense of

and it felt like there was a sense of

and it felt like there was a sense of shame it really took time to earn their

shame it really took time to earn their

shame it really took time to earn their trust in this face to let their guards

trust in this face to let their guards

trust in this face to let their guards down now the second phase was the most

down now the second phase was the most

down now the second phase was the most captivating one to me that was the

captivating one to me that was the

captivating one to me that was the release you see once they noticed I

release you see once they noticed I

release you see once they noticed I wasn’t there to judge them and when I

wasn’t there to judge them and when I

wasn’t there to judge them and when I told them that every emotion that would

told them that every emotion that would

told them that every emotion that would arise was completely validated

arise was completely validated

arise was completely validated I saw them physically relaxed and there

I saw them physically relaxed and there

I saw them physically relaxed and there was a sense of calmness in them when the

was a sense of calmness in them when the

was a sense of calmness in them when the discomfort would leave their bodies it

discomfort would leave their bodies it

discomfort would leave their bodies it was like they would literally let go of

was like they would literally let go of

was like they would literally let go of the tension that they were holding in

the tension that they were holding in

the tension that they were holding in the previous phase now the last phase

the previous phase now the last phase

the previous phase now the last phase which I called the encounter was the

which I called the encounter was the

which I called the encounter was the most beautiful face to me in this face

most beautiful face to me in this face

most beautiful face to me in this face it felt like they really let down their

it felt like they really let down their

it felt like they really let down their guards and I felt like I had a genuine

guards and I felt like I had a genuine

guards and I felt like I had a genuine and real connection it was during these

and real connection it was during these

and real connection it was during these moments that we would share our personal

moments that we would share our personal

moments that we would share our personal stories our fear and we could talk about

stories our fear and we could talk about

stories our fear and we could talk about this taboo called vulnerability it

this taboo called vulnerability it

this taboo called vulnerability it really felt like I had a glimpse of

really felt like I had a glimpse of

really felt like I had a glimpse of their real self and it was like I was

their real self and it was like I was

their real self and it was like I was staring into their soul overall through

staring into their soul overall through

staring into their soul overall through my research there was clearly one

my research there was clearly one

my research there was clearly one pattern that was feasible and that was

pattern that was feasible and that was

pattern that was feasible and that was the transition between resistance and

the transition between resistance and

the transition between resistance and surrender but what’s even more

surrender but what’s even more

surrender but what’s even more surprising with the reactions of the

surprising with the reactions of the

surprising with the reactions of the models when I showed them their own

models when I showed them their own

models when I showed them their own portrait some of them actually saw the

portrait some of them actually saw the

portrait some of them actually saw the beauty in it while other people never

beauty in it while other people never

beauty in it while other people never wanted to see me again what seemed

wanted to see me again what seemed

wanted to see me again what seemed confront what seems beautiful to me was

confront what seems beautiful to me was

confront what seems beautiful to me was confronting to most of them and all the

confronting to most of them and all the

confronting to most of them and all the sudden I realized have I done something

sudden I realized have I done something

sudden I realized have I done something wrong something ethically wrong all I

wrong something ethically wrong all I

wrong something ethically wrong all I tried to do was capture an emotion but

tried to do was capture an emotion but

tried to do was capture an emotion but then it hit me maybe I was seeing

then it hit me maybe I was seeing

then it hit me maybe I was seeing something in them I wasn’t supposed to

something in them I wasn’t supposed to

something in them I wasn’t supposed to see or maybe I was seeing something in

see or maybe I was seeing something in

see or maybe I was seeing something in them they didn’t want to see in

them they didn’t want to see in

them they didn’t want to see in themselves after shooting many models I

themselves after shooting many models I

themselves after shooting many models I thought it was time to take a step back

thought it was time to take a step back

thought it was time to take a step back and to reflect on my work and what I’d

and to reflect on my work and what I’d

and to reflect on my work and what I’d done and all the sudden I had this

done and all the sudden I had this

done and all the sudden I had this profound realization and I knew what my

profound realization and I knew what my

profound realization and I knew what my work was about and what it was trying to

work was about and what it was trying to

work was about and what it was trying to tell me it was about my own

tell me it was about my own

tell me it was about my own vulnerability

vulnerability

vulnerability I saw the vulnerability reflected back

I saw the vulnerability reflected back

I saw the vulnerability reflected back at me in all of these people I was face

at me in all of these people I was face

at me in all of these people I was face to face with a shadow aspect of myself I

to face with a shadow aspect of myself I

to face with a shadow aspect of myself I was afraid to show

was afraid to show

was afraid to show and at that moment I knew I have my

and at that moment I knew I have my

and at that moment I knew I have my answer my inner world was mirrored back

answer my inner world was mirrored back

answer my inner world was mirrored back at me through my external reality all

at me through my external reality all

at me through my external reality all these moments I tried to capture with my

these moments I tried to capture with my

these moments I tried to capture with my camera made sense now this transition

camera made sense now this transition

camera made sense now this transition from resistance to surrender from shame

from resistance to surrender from shame

from resistance to surrender from shame to acceptance all I tried to do was to

to acceptance all I tried to do was to

to acceptance all I tried to do was to create a space where there was pure

create a space where there was pure

create a space where there was pure presence you see whatever we disowned in

presence you see whatever we disowned in

presence you see whatever we disowned in ourselves will be reflected back at us

ourselves will be reflected back at us

ourselves will be reflected back at us but it is true the other that we can see

but it is true the other that we can see

but it is true the other that we can see our reflection it is true the other that

our reflection it is true the other that

our reflection it is true the other that we come to know the contents of our

we come to know the contents of our

we come to know the contents of our inner world there’s only one thing that

inner world there’s only one thing that

inner world there’s only one thing that I forgot in the process and that was my

I forgot in the process and that was my

I forgot in the process and that was my self I was so focused on finding answers

self I was so focused on finding answers

self I was so focused on finding answers outside of myself that I forgot that the

outside of myself that I forgot that the

outside of myself that I forgot that the answer was hidden deep within and after

answer was hidden deep within and after

answer was hidden deep within and after this huge realization my intuition told

this huge realization my intuition told

this huge realization my intuition told me there was time to go inwards to truly

me there was time to go inwards to truly

me there was time to go inwards to truly feel my emotions to feel my vulnerable

feel my emotions to feel my vulnerable

feel my emotions to feel my vulnerable side instead of trying to capture it in

side instead of trying to capture it in

side instead of trying to capture it in others right at that moment I actually

others right at that moment I actually

others right at that moment I actually started meditating daily I even went to

started meditating daily I even went to

started meditating daily I even went to those meditation centers where you have

those meditation centers where you have

those meditation centers where you have to be silent on day friend and I can

to be silent on day friend and I can

to be silent on day friend and I can tell you that’s no fun but what I found

tell you that’s no fun but what I found

tell you that’s no fun but what I found there touched me deeply because for the

there touched me deeply because for the

there touched me deeply because for the first time in my life I connected with a

first time in my life I connected with a

first time in my life I connected with a deeper part of myself a part that goes

deeper part of myself a part that goes

deeper part of myself a part that goes beyond the physical form a part that

beyond the physical form a part that

beyond the physical form a part that goes beyond identity and I had to cry

goes beyond identity and I had to cry

goes beyond identity and I had to cry for weeks and not only because I

for weeks and not only because I

for weeks and not only because I released so many suppressed emotions I

released so many suppressed emotions I

released so many suppressed emotions I didn’t know I even had but also out of

didn’t know I even had but also out of

didn’t know I even had but also out of pure happiness now I know that the

pure happiness now I know that the

pure happiness now I know that the mental image I had of myself and my

mental image I had of myself and my

mental image I had of myself and my negative self-beliefs have nothing to do

negative self-beliefs have nothing to do

negative self-beliefs have nothing to do with who I truly am in my core looking

with who I truly am in my core looking

with who I truly am in my core looking back at my journey there were three

back at my journey there were three

back at my journey there were three incredibly important lessons that I’ve

incredibly important lessons that I’ve

incredibly important lessons that I’ve learned that I want you to know

learned that I want you to know

learned that I want you to know one instead of bypassing the

one instead of bypassing the

one instead of bypassing the uncomfortable dive into the

uncomfortable dive into the

uncomfortable dive into the uncomfortable it wasn’t until later I

uncomfortable it wasn’t until later I

uncomfortable it wasn’t until later I realized that it was the discomfort that

realized that it was the discomfort that

realized that it was the discomfort that pushed me out of my comfort zone

pushed me out of my comfort zone

pushed me out of my comfort zone you see discomfort can be catalyst for

you see discomfort can be catalyst for

you see discomfort can be catalyst for change and therefore for growth instead

change and therefore for growth instead

change and therefore for growth instead of trying to change or bypass the

of trying to change or bypass the

of trying to change or bypass the discomfort in a situation I decided to

discomfort in a situation I decided to

discomfort in a situation I decided to lean into it to be unconditionally

lean into it to be unconditionally

lean into it to be unconditionally present with yourself we are often

present with yourself we are often

present with yourself we are often afraid to be in stillness we are often

afraid to be in stillness we are often

afraid to be in stillness we are often afraid to be really seen by others

afraid to be really seen by others

afraid to be really seen by others because we have been raised with

because we have been raised with

because we have been raised with conditional love we praise the good

conditional love we praise the good

conditional love we praise the good qualities in ourselves and we tend to

qualities in ourselves and we tend to

qualities in ourselves and we tend to reject the bed when we learn that our

reject the bed when we learn that our

reject the bed when we learn that our fears are silly we learn to hide those

fears are silly we learn to hide those

fears are silly we learn to hide those emotions from others and even ourselves

emotions from others and even ourselves

emotions from others and even ourselves and we lose sight of the importance of

and we lose sight of the importance of

and we lose sight of the importance of those emotions and a truth they are

those emotions and a truth they are

those emotions and a truth they are trying to tell us but I believe that if

trying to tell us but I believe that if

trying to tell us but I believe that if we learn to look at our negative

we learn to look at our negative

we learn to look at our negative emotions without judgments this is what

emotions without judgments this is what

emotions without judgments this is what creates real compassion towards yourself

creates real compassion towards yourself

creates real compassion towards yourself and towards others free honor and own

and towards others free honor and own

and towards others free honor and own your vulnerability if you disown your

your vulnerability if you disown your

your vulnerability if you disown your vulnerability it will be reflected back

vulnerability it will be reflected back

vulnerability it will be reflected back at you one way or another it will create

at you one way or another it will create

at you one way or another it will create situations where you will feel shame

situations where you will feel shame

situations where you will feel shame judgment disconnection however if you

judgment disconnection however if you

judgment disconnection however if you earn your vulnerability this actually

earn your vulnerability this actually

earn your vulnerability this actually opens the door to real authenticity if

opens the door to real authenticity if

opens the door to real authenticity if anything I learned that by suppressing

anything I learned that by suppressing

anything I learned that by suppressing my emotions denying my vulnerability and

my emotions denying my vulnerability and

my emotions denying my vulnerability and wearing a social mask were actually

wearing a social mask were actually

wearing a social mask were actually destroying me but it also cost a great

destroying me but it also cost a great

destroying me but it also cost a great and spiritual wake-up call in me shame

and spiritual wake-up call in me shame

and spiritual wake-up call in me shame is what seems to hold us back from

is what seems to hold us back from

is what seems to hold us back from acting as the most true and real us but

acting as the most true and real us but

acting as the most true and real us but what are we even scared to show our most

what are we even scared to show our most

what are we even scared to show our most real vulnerable feelings when we have

real vulnerable feelings when we have

real vulnerable feelings when we have the courage to look at our own shadow

the courage to look at our own shadow

the courage to look at our own shadow there is no fear to be head it is only

there is no fear to be head it is only

there is no fear to be head it is only often because we are so blinded by the

often because we are so blinded by the

often because we are so blinded by the masks we wear and so

masks we wear and so

masks we wear and so eager to receive outside approval that

eager to receive outside approval that

eager to receive outside approval that we sometimes fail to recognize the

we sometimes fail to recognize the

we sometimes fail to recognize the beauty that is already present within us

now I want to challenge you to look at

now I want to challenge you to look at yourself from a different perspective

yourself from a different perspective

yourself from a different perspective don’t worry I’m not gonna ask you to put

don’t worry I’m not gonna ask you to put

don’t worry I’m not gonna ask you to put your clothes off or so become a new

your clothes off or so become a new

your clothes off or so become a new model like me but the next time you are

model like me but the next time you are

model like me but the next time you are tempted to judge someone or to judge

tempted to judge someone or to judge

tempted to judge someone or to judge yourself I want you to take a step back

yourself I want you to take a step back

yourself I want you to take a step back breathe and ask yourself what is being

breathe and ask yourself what is being

breathe and ask yourself what is being mirrored within my consciousness putting

mirrored within my consciousness putting

mirrored within my consciousness putting yourself out there takes vulnerability

yourself out there takes vulnerability

yourself out there takes vulnerability but if you have the courage to step out

but if you have the courage to step out

but if you have the courage to step out of your comfort zone and be vulnerable

of your comfort zone and be vulnerable

of your comfort zone and be vulnerable you will inspire others to do the same

you will inspire others to do the same

you will inspire others to do the same and that that is real power thank you

and that that is real power thank you

and that that is real power thank you [Applause]