thank you before I start can people just thank this beautiful woman Ellen for
thank this beautiful woman Ellen for
thank this beautiful woman Ellen for putting this together
putting this together
putting this together she and I were getting into it backstage
she and I were getting into it backstage
she and I were getting into it backstage a little too inspiring for both of our
a little too inspiring for both of our
a little too inspiring for both of our own Goods so we’re both kind of moved
own Goods so we’re both kind of moved
own Goods so we’re both kind of moved right now okay I want to talk to you
right now okay I want to talk to you
right now okay I want to talk to you about do a day it’s how I’ve changed my
about do a day it’s how I’ve changed my
about do a day it’s how I’ve changed my life and it’s how I’ve helped others to
life and it’s how I’ve helped others to
life and it’s how I’ve helped others to do the same but before I do that I need
do the same but before I do that I need
do the same but before I do that I need to ask you a question
to ask you a question
to ask you a question but seeing how many high schoolers there
but seeing how many high schoolers there
but seeing how many high schoolers there are here I need to ask some of you a
are here I need to ask some of you a
are here I need to ask some of you a question for those of you who are past
question for those of you who are past
question for those of you who are past high school how many of you wish you
high school how many of you wish you
high school how many of you wish you were at your high school wait some hands
were at your high school wait some hands
were at your high school wait some hands going up I know it’s a younger audience
going up I know it’s a younger audience
going up I know it’s a younger audience but there’s quite a few hands okay I
but there’s quite a few hands okay I
but there’s quite a few hands okay I don’t because if I was at my high school
don’t because if I was at my high school
don’t because if I was at my high school weight I would weigh a hundred pounds
weight I would weigh a hundred pounds
weight I would weigh a hundred pounds more than I do right now that’s right I
more than I do right now that’s right I
more than I do right now that’s right I was the fat kid and I’m the one in the
was the fat kid and I’m the one in the
was the fat kid and I’m the one in the dark suit if you’re not sure that’s not
dark suit if you’re not sure that’s not
dark suit if you’re not sure that’s not that that’s my mother
that that’s my mother
that that’s my mother I wasn’t obese because I ate too much
I wasn’t obese because I ate too much
I wasn’t obese because I ate too much although I did eat way too much I was
although I did eat way too much I was
although I did eat way too much I was obese because my parents got divorced
obese because my parents got divorced
obese because my parents got divorced when I was really little and kids have
when I was really little and kids have
when I was really little and kids have this one basic need and it’s just to
this one basic need and it’s just to
this one basic need and it’s just to feel loved and secure and safe and like
feel loved and secure and safe and like
feel loved and secure and safe and like everything’s gonna be okay
everything’s gonna be okay
everything’s gonna be okay because they can’t do that for
because they can’t do that for
because they can’t do that for themselves and I didn’t feel that
themselves and I didn’t feel that
themselves and I didn’t feel that because my whole world was coming apart
because my whole world was coming apart
because my whole world was coming apart and there were three other kids and my
and there were three other kids and my
and there were three other kids and my parents were busy with the divorce so
parents were busy with the divorce so
parents were busy with the divorce so they couldn’t be there for me in that
they couldn’t be there for me in that
they couldn’t be there for me in that way and I certainly didn’t understand
way and I certainly didn’t understand
way and I certainly didn’t understand the emotions myself to know to ask about
the emotions myself to know to ask about
the emotions myself to know to ask about it so I turned to food to fill that hole
it so I turned to food to fill that hole
it so I turned to food to fill that hole and this anxiety really got the best of
and this anxiety really got the best of
and this anxiety really got the best of me and I can tell you from firsthand
me and I can tell you from firsthand
me and I can tell you from firsthand research extensive first-hand research
research extensive first-hand research
research extensive first-hand research food does not cure anxiety it’s quite
food does not cure anxiety it’s quite
food does not cure anxiety it’s quite the opposite so I put on a lot of weight
the opposite so I put on a lot of weight
the opposite so I put on a lot of weight and luckily I was able to lose it in
and luckily I was able to lose it in
and luckily I was able to lose it in high school thanks to the help of this
high school thanks to the help of this
high school thanks to the help of this amazing guy who ran the PE program in my
amazing guy who ran the PE program in my
amazing guy who ran the PE program in my high school
high school
high school he taught me a different relationship
he taught me a different relationship
he taught me a different relationship with diet and exercise and I grabbed
with diet and exercise and I grabbed
with diet and exercise and I grabbed hold of it what I didn’t do is grab hold
hold of it what I didn’t do is grab hold
hold of it what I didn’t do is grab hold of why I was obese
of why I was obese
of why I was obese in the first place and deal with that
in the first place and deal with that
in the first place and deal with that underlying cause of my anxiety so
underlying cause of my anxiety so
underlying cause of my anxiety so despite all the exercising and all the
despite all the exercising and all the
despite all the exercising and all the better eating eventually the anxiety won
better eating eventually the anxiety won
better eating eventually the anxiety won out and then I ended up putting on about
out and then I ended up putting on about
out and then I ended up putting on about half the weight like a lot of people who
half the weight like a lot of people who
half the weight like a lot of people who lose weight go through that you put back
lose weight go through that you put back
lose weight go through that you put back on quite a
on quite a
on quite a of it so I put on about 45 pounds after
of it so I put on about 45 pounds after
of it so I put on about 45 pounds after losing 100 now I never looked obese
losing 100 now I never looked obese
losing 100 now I never looked obese again I just looked American right I
again I just looked American right I
again I just looked American right I looked like everybody else no one would
looked like everybody else no one would
looked like everybody else no one would have looked at me and been like oh
have looked at me and been like oh
have looked at me and been like oh there’s that fat guy just like oh it’s
there’s that fat guy just like oh it’s
there’s that fat guy just like oh it’s Brian he’s like all of us not only was I
Brian he’s like all of us not only was I
Brian he’s like all of us not only was I not healthy though most importantly I
not healthy though most importantly I
not healthy though most importantly I was not happy and actually the anxiety
was not happy and actually the anxiety
was not happy and actually the anxiety was getting worse and worse because now
was getting worse and worse because now
was getting worse and worse because now I had all these adult level
I had all these adult level
I had all these adult level responsibilities layered on top of it so
responsibilities layered on top of it so
responsibilities layered on top of it so I wasn’t dealing with you know that that
I wasn’t dealing with you know that that
I wasn’t dealing with you know that that driving force that led me to get back to
driving force that led me to get back to
driving force that led me to get back to this stage of obesity and frankly
this stage of obesity and frankly
this stage of obesity and frankly there’s only forty five pounds
there’s only forty five pounds
there’s only forty five pounds overweight because I happen to stop it
overweight because I happen to stop it
overweight because I happen to stop it halfway through I would have clearly
halfway through I would have clearly
halfway through I would have clearly gone right back to where it was I
gone right back to where it was I
gone right back to where it was I stopped it in 2011 when I woke up but
stopped it in 2011 when I woke up but
stopped it in 2011 when I woke up but that’s a misnomer I didn’t wake up I was
that’s a misnomer I didn’t wake up I was
that’s a misnomer I didn’t wake up I was forced to because I nearly lost
forced to because I nearly lost
forced to because I nearly lost everything so that woman there that’s my
everything so that woman there that’s my
everything so that woman there that’s my wife
wife
wife and that’s our son it’s a little before
and that’s our son it’s a little before
and that’s our son it’s a little before that point in 2011 but in that summer I
that point in 2011 but in that summer I
that point in 2011 but in that summer I should preface this by saying she is
should preface this by saying she is
should preface this by saying she is still alive and you’ll understand why I
still alive and you’ll understand why I
still alive and you’ll understand why I need to say that that summer she was on
need to say that that summer she was on
need to say that that summer she was on her deathbed she was wasting away
her deathbed she was wasting away
her deathbed she was wasting away chronically ill no one knew what was
chronically ill no one knew what was
chronically ill no one knew what was going on no one could do anything for
going on no one could do anything for
going on no one could do anything for her and it didn’t look like she was
her and it didn’t look like she was
her and it didn’t look like she was going to survive the summer and I get a
going to survive the summer and I get a
going to survive the summer and I get a call on June 30th 2011 from her primary
call on June 30th 2011 from her primary
call on June 30th 2011 from her primary care doctor to say hey we don’t really
care doctor to say hey we don’t really
care doctor to say hey we don’t really know what’s going on can’t do anything
know what’s going on can’t do anything
know what’s going on can’t do anything I’m going on vacation I’ll check in in
I’m going on vacation I’ll check in in
I’m going on vacation I’ll check in in six weeks and I said doctor she’s losing
six weeks and I said doctor she’s losing
six weeks and I said doctor she’s losing two pounds a day she’s barely 100 pounds
two pounds a day she’s barely 100 pounds
two pounds a day she’s barely 100 pounds can’t really get out of bed do the math
can’t really get out of bed do the math
can’t really get out of bed do the math she will not be here in six weeks and
she will not be here in six weeks and
she will not be here in six weeks and from the other end of the phone I heard
from the other end of the phone I heard
from the other end of the phone I heard okay we’ll take her to the ER if you
okay we’ll take her to the ER if you
okay we’ll take her to the ER if you need to and he hung up so I had to pull
need to and he hung up so I had to pull
need to and he hung up so I had to pull myself together and walk back into our
myself together and walk back into our
myself together and walk back into our bedroom and my wife was in bed and my
bedroom and my wife was in bed and my
bedroom and my wife was in bed and my son was at the foot of the bed
son was at the foot of the bed
son was at the foot of the bed standing there looking at his mom
standing there looking at his mom
standing there looking at his mom suffering and he turned and looked at me
suffering and he turned and looked at me
suffering and he turned and looked at me and when his eyes caught me that was the
and when his eyes caught me that was the
and when his eyes caught me that was the moment that I will go because in his
moment that I will go because in his
moment that I will go because in his eyes I saw something that made me stop
eyes I saw something that made me stop
eyes I saw something that made me stop dead in my tracks
dead in my tracks
dead in my tracks and say in my head not out loud because
and say in my head not out loud because
and say in my head not out loud because there was a child there what are you
there was a child there what are you
there was a child there what are you doing
doing
doing this poor woman is suffering and she’s
this poor woman is suffering and she’s
this poor woman is suffering and she’s all alone in that suffering and you’re
all alone in that suffering and you’re
all alone in that suffering and you’re so caught up in your anxiety about all
so caught up in your anxiety about all
so caught up in your anxiety about all the things that are going wrong and all
the things that are going wrong and all
the things that are going wrong and all the things you have to constantly do and
the things you have to constantly do and
the things you have to constantly do and how it’s only gonna get worse and what
how it’s only gonna get worse and what
how it’s only gonna get worse and what if she’s not here and then you’re all
if she’s not here and then you’re all
if she’s not here and then you’re all alone and how are you supposed to work
alone and how are you supposed to work
alone and how are you supposed to work and take care of this kid and all of it
and take care of this kid and all of it
and take care of this kid and all of it you’re so caught up in all that you
you’re so caught up in all that you
you’re so caught up in all that you can’t even be there for her now don’t
can’t even be there for her now don’t
can’t even be there for her now don’t mean doing things but I mean hearing her
mean doing things but I mean hearing her
mean doing things but I mean hearing her be supportive be the husband she
be supportive be the husband she
be supportive be the husband she actually needs if she’s going to have a
actually needs if she’s going to have a
actually needs if she’s going to have a chance to survive you’re not doing any
chance to survive you’re not doing any
chance to survive you’re not doing any of that and then I looked at my son look
of that and then I looked at my son look
of that and then I looked at my son look if I had as she is coming out of my
if I had as she is coming out of my
if I had as she is coming out of my parents divorce definitely losing your
parents divorce definitely losing your
parents divorce definitely losing your mother when you’re 2 years old when that
mother when you’re 2 years old when that
mother when you’re 2 years old when that process happens right in front of your
process happens right in front of your
process happens right in front of your eyes that’s way more definitional and if
eyes that’s way more definitional and if
eyes that’s way more definitional and if that amazing little boy is gonna have
that amazing little boy is gonna have
that amazing little boy is gonna have any shot at happiness for the rest of
any shot at happiness for the rest of
any shot at happiness for the rest of his life with only one parent it’s not
his life with only one parent it’s not
his life with only one parent it’s not gonna be with a parent like I was he
gonna be with a parent like I was he
gonna be with a parent like I was he deserves better
deserves better
deserves better he needs better but there was a third
he needs better but there was a third
he needs better but there was a third thing that hit me and this is the first
thing that hit me and this is the first
thing that hit me and this is the first time I’d ever felt this in my entire
time I’d ever felt this in my entire
time I’d ever felt this in my entire life is I actually deserve better and I
life is I actually deserve better and I
life is I actually deserve better and I need better see I always thought that
need better see I always thought that
need better see I always thought that this is just my life I’m gonna suffer
this is just my life I’m gonna suffer
this is just my life I’m gonna suffer I’m gonna have things I have to do and
I’m gonna have things I have to do and
I’m gonna have things I have to do and have all this responsibility and no one
have all this responsibility and no one
have all this responsibility and no one else can do it because it’s all falling
else can do it because it’s all falling
else can do it because it’s all falling apart and I’m the only one who can stop
apart and I’m the only one who can stop
apart and I’m the only one who can stop it I mean it’s exactly the story that
it I mean it’s exactly the story that
it I mean it’s exactly the story that came from my childhood and followed me
came from my childhood and followed me
came from my childhood and followed me through all the years that I bought into
through all the years that I bought into
through all the years that I bought into and just accept it I took it for granted
and just accept it I took it for granted
and just accept it I took it for granted as the only fact until this moment
as the only fact until this moment
as the only fact until this moment because I realized actually I want
because I realized actually I want
because I realized actually I want better I deserve better and this was
better I deserve better and this was
better I deserve better and this was crazy different I was actually capable
crazy different I was actually capable
crazy different I was actually capable of achieving better remember I was the
of achieving better remember I was the
of achieving better remember I was the fat kid I was lazy I was no good I
fat kid I was lazy I was no good I
fat kid I was lazy I was no good I sucked at sports I would get shorter but
sucked at sports I would get shorter but
sucked at sports I would get shorter but I mean all of it all of a sudden I felt
I mean all of it all of a sudden I felt
I mean all of it all of a sudden I felt like no I’m fully capable of achieving
like no I’m fully capable of achieving
like no I’m fully capable of achieving what I wish I had this felt really
what I wish I had this felt really
what I wish I had this felt really different so I went to bed that night
different so I went to bed that night
different so I went to bed that night and when I woke up the next morning I
and when I woke up the next morning I
and when I woke up the next morning I still had the feeling only it was
still had the feeling only it was
still had the feeling only it was actually stronger and I decided look you
actually stronger and I decided look you
actually stronger and I decided look you can recognize that this thing can fade
can recognize that this thing can fade
can recognize that this thing can fade away
away
away if you let it or you can grab hold of it
if you let it or you can grab hold of it
if you let it or you can grab hold of it because this is a lifeline and you’ll
because this is a lifeline and you’ll
because this is a lifeline and you’ll get one shot to grab those things so
get one shot to grab those things so
get one shot to grab those things so that’s what I decided to do and what I
that’s what I decided to do and what I
that’s what I decided to do and what I started with with was recognizing what
started with with was recognizing what
started with with was recognizing what was so different about this feeling for
was so different about this feeling for
was so different about this feeling for things became really clear to me the
things became really clear to me the
things became really clear to me the first in what I call understanding my
first in what I call understanding my
first in what I call understanding my true motivation or my purpose and we’re
true motivation or my purpose and we’re
true motivation or my purpose and we’re hearing a lot about that today is this
hearing a lot about that today is this
hearing a lot about that today is this thing was deep within me so when I lost
thing was deep within me so when I lost
thing was deep within me so when I lost weight the first time it was about other
weight the first time it was about other
weight the first time it was about other people kids in my school viewing me as
people kids in my school viewing me as
people kids in my school viewing me as the fat kid and I didn’t want that
the fat kid and I didn’t want that
the fat kid and I didn’t want that that’s why I lost weight that first time
that’s why I lost weight that first time
that’s why I lost weight that first time around but then I went to college and
around but then I went to college and
around but then I went to college and nobody knew me so guess what my
nobody knew me so guess what my
nobody knew me so guess what my motivation banished because I let the
motivation banished because I let the
motivation banished because I let the motivation exist outside of me what I’m
motivation exist outside of me what I’m
motivation exist outside of me what I’m talking about now about my life and my
talking about now about my life and my
talking about now about my life and my role as a father and my love for my son
role as a father and my love for my son
role as a father and my love for my son and my my wife and how she needs me to
and my my wife and how she needs me to
and my my wife and how she needs me to survive and my love for myself that’s
survive and my love for myself that’s
survive and my love for myself that’s deep inside of me the second really
deep inside of me the second really
deep inside of me the second really important thing is enduring so when I
important thing is enduring so when I
important thing is enduring so when I went to college no one knew me as a fat
went to college no one knew me as a fat
went to college no one knew me as a fat kid motivation over it had an end date
kid motivation over it had an end date
kid motivation over it had an end date and you hear about people who lose
and you hear about people who lose
and you hear about people who lose weight for their wedding or their high
weight for their wedding or their high
weight for their wedding or their high school reunion I just had one of mine
school reunion I just had one of mine
school reunion I just had one of mine last spring and you see all these people
last spring and you see all these people
last spring and you see all these people get in shape for it or beach season or
get in shape for it or beach season or
get in shape for it or beach season or what about someone who spends
what about someone who spends
what about someone who spends frivolously and then they need to buy a
frivolously and then they need to buy a
frivolously and then they need to buy a house so they they start controlling
house so they they start controlling
house so they they start controlling their spending and they save up some
their spending and they save up some
their spending and they save up some money what happens once they save the
money what happens once they save the
money what happens once they save the money and buy the house if your
money and buy the house if your
money and buy the house if your motivation has an end date guess what
motivation has an end date guess what
motivation has an end date guess what doesn’t keep motivating you so you have
doesn’t keep motivating you so you have
doesn’t keep motivating you so you have to find one that actually is going to
to find one that actually is going to
to find one that actually is going to endure every situation and time next is
endure every situation and time next is
endure every situation and time next is profound as you guys can see from how
profound as you guys can see from how
profound as you guys can see from how I’m talking about it on stage my
I’m talking about it on stage my
I’m talking about it on stage my motivation is pretty profound even to
motivation is pretty profound even to
motivation is pretty profound even to this day seven years later I have to
this day seven years later I have to
this day seven years later I have to pause when I talk about it and I’ve
pause when I talk about it and I’ve
pause when I talk about it and I’ve talked about it as Ellen said over a
talked about it as Ellen said over a
talked about it as Ellen said over a hundred times and all these podcasts and
hundred times and all these podcasts and
hundred times and all these podcasts and everything I’ve written a book about it
everything I’ve written a book about it
everything I’ve written a book about it and it still brings me to the point of
and it still brings me to the point of
and it still brings me to the point of nearly tears can still bring me to my
nearly tears can still bring me to my
nearly tears can still bring me to my knees if I let it that’s really profound
knees if I let it that’s really profound
knees if I let it that’s really profound tied to that and I call this one out
tied to that and I call this one out
tied to that and I call this one out specifically is non-material I’m not
specifically is non-material I’m not
specifically is non-material I’m not talking about stuff and things talking
talking about stuff and things talking
talking about stuff and things talking about values right it’s it’s what’s deep
about values right it’s it’s what’s deep
about values right it’s it’s what’s deep within you not about buying a house
within you not about buying a house
within you not about buying a house maybe about creating a home
maybe about creating a home
maybe about creating a home your family but not the bricks and the
your family but not the bricks and the
your family but not the bricks and the glass and the grandeur of having a big
glass and the grandeur of having a big
glass and the grandeur of having a big house that stands out against your
house that stands out against your
house that stands out against your neighbors or something it’s the value
neighbors or something it’s the value
neighbors or something it’s the value side of it that’s what was so different
side of it that’s what was so different
side of it that’s what was so different in my true motivation now finding the
in my true motivation now finding the
in my true motivation now finding the motivation is not good enough but that’s
motivation is not good enough but that’s
motivation is not good enough but that’s good enough to keep you going and it’s a
good enough to keep you going and it’s a
good enough to keep you going and it’s a component in this complete structure
component in this complete structure
component in this complete structure that I kind of talked about is building
that I kind of talked about is building
that I kind of talked about is building a house of a successful life and I want
a house of a successful life and I want
a house of a successful life and I want to walk you through that
to walk you through that
to walk you through that there were four key pieces of true
there were four key pieces of true
there were four key pieces of true motivation there’s four things that you
motivation there’s four things that you
motivation there’s four things that you have to do to actually transform your
have to do to actually transform your
have to do to actually transform your life the first is when you build a house
life the first is when you build a house
life the first is when you build a house you don’t just build it anywhere you
you don’t just build it anywhere you
you don’t just build it anywhere you have to find strong stable solid ground
have to find strong stable solid ground
have to find strong stable solid ground right you don’t build a new house on
right you don’t build a new house on
right you don’t build a new house on quicksand because it’s not gonna stand
quicksand because it’s not gonna stand
quicksand because it’s not gonna stand up the strong ground is self-love and
up the strong ground is self-love and
up the strong ground is self-love and that’s really important remember I said
that’s really important remember I said
that’s really important remember I said I actually felt like I deserved a better
I actually felt like I deserved a better
I actually felt like I deserved a better life and I was capable of it if you
life and I was capable of it if you
life and I was capable of it if you don’t think you deserve better and even
don’t think you deserve better and even
don’t think you deserve better and even if you think you deserve it if you don’t
if you think you deserve it if you don’t
if you think you deserve it if you don’t think you could achieve it even if you
think you could achieve it even if you
think you could achieve it even if you tried guess what you won’t not with that
tried guess what you won’t not with that
tried guess what you won’t not with that attitude so we have to get to a place
attitude so we have to get to a place
attitude so we have to get to a place where we actually love ourselves enough
where we actually love ourselves enough
where we actually love ourselves enough to allow for ourselves to have better
to allow for ourselves to have better
to allow for ourselves to have better and that’s really hard in this society
and that’s really hard in this society
and that’s really hard in this society we’re really self deprecating we get
we’re really self deprecating we get
we’re really self deprecating we get into competitions with people about who
into competitions with people about who
into competitions with people about who had more work last night who worked
had more work last night who worked
had more work last night who worked later who slept less who has more exams
later who slept less who has more exams
later who slept less who has more exams today whatever it might be like the
today whatever it might be like the
today whatever it might be like the winner is the person who’s more
winner is the person who’s more
winner is the person who’s more miserable how does that make any sense
miserable how does that make any sense
miserable how does that make any sense so I give people a little exercise I say
so I give people a little exercise I say
so I give people a little exercise I say stop the but so think about the last
stop the but so think about the last
stop the but so think about the last time you went to someone’s house for
time you went to someone’s house for
time you went to someone’s house for dinner and you compliment them on the
dinner and you compliment them on the
dinner and you compliment them on the food and they’re like oh thanks but I
food and they’re like oh thanks but I
food and they’re like oh thanks but I burnt the chicken no it’s actually just
burnt the chicken no it’s actually just
burnt the chicken no it’s actually just pronounced thanks as soon as that word
pronounced thanks as soon as that word
pronounced thanks as soon as that word but forms in your head when there’s
but forms in your head when there’s
but forms in your head when there’s something good about you out there from
something good about you out there from
something good about you out there from someone else or from yourself stop just
someone else or from yourself stop just
someone else or from yourself stop just allow for the good to be the more you do
allow for the good to be the more you do
allow for the good to be the more you do it the more you reinforce self-love so
it the more you reinforce self-love so
it the more you reinforce self-love so that’s the first step
that’s the first step
that’s the first step the second is to find your why that’s
the second is to find your why that’s
the second is to find your why that’s that true motivation I was just talking
that true motivation I was just talking
that true motivation I was just talking about it’s that deep enduring profound
about it’s that deep enduring profound
about it’s that deep enduring profound non-material thing that will power you
non-material thing that will power you
non-material thing that will power you through all of the tough moments I have
through all of the tough moments I have
through all of the tough moments I have a number of questions that I give to
a number of questions that I give to
a number of questions that I give to people I work with but the one that sum
people I work with but the one that sum
people I work with but the one that sum it up with is what will you always care
it up with is what will you always care
it up with is what will you always care about no matter what else is happening
about no matter what else is happening
about no matter what else is happening and what I’d say is whatever answer you
and what I’d say is whatever answer you
and what I’d say is whatever answer you come to it’s probably wrong it’s not
come to it’s probably wrong it’s not
come to it’s probably wrong it’s not totally wrong it’s just it’s to surface
totally wrong it’s just it’s to surface
totally wrong it’s just it’s to surface level you have to ask yourself why keep
level you have to ask yourself why keep
level you have to ask yourself why keep pushing deeper and deeper and deeper
pushing deeper and deeper and deeper
pushing deeper and deeper and deeper until you get down to that bottom level
until you get down to that bottom level
until you get down to that bottom level and that can take time and that might
and that can take time and that might
and that can take time and that might scare some people that’s okay you know
scare some people that’s okay you know
scare some people that’s okay you know for me it started with just being about
for me it started with just being about
for me it started with just being about my son and I wrote my book and I put it
my son and I wrote my book and I put it
my son and I wrote my book and I put it out and I was talking about my son and
out and I was talking about my son and
out and I was talking about my son and my wife and in the year since my book
my wife and in the year since my book
my wife and in the year since my book came out I’ve actually discovered it’s
came out I’ve actually discovered it’s
came out I’ve actually discovered it’s more than just that I discovered all
more than just that I discovered all
more than just that I discovered all this stuff about me that I told you
this stuff about me that I told you
this stuff about me that I told you about even after six years and writing a
about even after six years and writing a
about even after six years and writing a book and speaking on it I still didn’t
book and speaking on it I still didn’t
book and speaking on it I still didn’t know that’s okay it’s a journey you
know that’s okay it’s a journey you
know that’s okay it’s a journey you figure this stuff out as time goes on
figure this stuff out as time goes on
figure this stuff out as time goes on the next is to set your intention that’s
the next is to set your intention that’s
the next is to set your intention that’s your ultimate goal of the things you
your ultimate goal of the things you
your ultimate goal of the things you want to be better in your life so when I
want to be better in your life so when I
want to be better in your life so when I had a hundred pounds to lose the goal
had a hundred pounds to lose the goal
had a hundred pounds to lose the goal was not Ken it was a hundred and that’s
was not Ken it was a hundred and that’s
was not Ken it was a hundred and that’s super daunting it’s a lot but that’s
super daunting it’s a lot but that’s
super daunting it’s a lot but that’s okay that’s where I’m trying to get to I
okay that’s where I’m trying to get to I
okay that’s where I’m trying to get to I got time so you set the real goal of
got time so you set the real goal of
got time so you set the real goal of that ultimate place you want to be
that ultimate place you want to be
that ultimate place you want to be everything else is a step along the
everything else is a step along the
everything else is a step along the journey and the last thing especially in
journey and the last thing especially in
journey and the last thing especially in the face of daunting goals is do a day
the face of daunting goals is do a day
the face of daunting goals is do a day that’s the way that I execute against
that’s the way that I execute against
that’s the way that I execute against those goals every day and I want to
those goals every day and I want to
those goals every day and I want to break down the two key words in there do
break down the two key words in there do
break down the two key words in there do and day let’s start with a second one
and day let’s start with a second one
and day let’s start with a second one though I guess it’s the third word so
though I guess it’s the third word so
though I guess it’s the third word so day is really about the here and now see
day is really about the here and now see
day is really about the here and now see we live our lives caught between
we live our lives caught between
we live our lives caught between yesterday and tomorrow yesterday is all
yesterday and tomorrow yesterday is all
yesterday and tomorrow yesterday is all of this judgment and pain and regret so
of this judgment and pain and regret so
of this judgment and pain and regret so it’s pain from hardships we faced ways
it’s pain from hardships we faced ways
it’s pain from hardships we faced ways we were mistreated things people did to
we were mistreated things people did to
we were mistreated things people did to us that we didn’t like or it’s regret
us that we didn’t like or it’s regret
us that we didn’t like or it’s regret for things we’ve done mistakes we’ve
for things we’ve done mistakes we’ve
for things we’ve done mistakes we’ve made actions we’ve taken that weren’t us
made actions we’ve taken that weren’t us
made actions we’ve taken that weren’t us in our best moment or maybe it’s the
in our best moment or maybe it’s the
in our best moment or maybe it’s the pain over losing something whether it’s
pain over losing something whether it’s
pain over losing something whether it’s a loved one or something that you really
a loved one or something that you really
a loved one or something that you really cared about and we bring all of that
cared about and we bring all of that
cared about and we bring all of that pain all that negativity all that dark
pain all that negativity all that dark
pain all that negativity all that dark cloud into today and it really impacts
cloud into today and it really impacts
cloud into today and it really impacts the decisions we make right now because
the decisions we make right now because
the decisions we make right now because we react from a place of pain it’s not a
we react from a place of pain it’s not a
we react from a place of pain it’s not a great way to start
great way to start
great way to start now that’s yesterday at the same time
now that’s yesterday at the same time
now that’s yesterday at the same time we’ve all this tomorrow facing us and
we’ve all this tomorrow facing us and
we’ve all this tomorrow facing us and that was my big deal with my anxiety was
that was my big deal with my anxiety was
that was my big deal with my anxiety was all the things that were going to go
all the things that were going to go
all the things that were going to go wrong if I didn’t act faster and get on
wrong if I didn’t act faster and get on
wrong if I didn’t act faster and get on so we live with all this pain and
so we live with all this pain and
so we live with all this pain and anticipation and anxiety of tomorrow and
anticipation and anxiety of tomorrow and
anticipation and anxiety of tomorrow and as a result we lose today but see the
as a result we lose today but see the
as a result we lose today but see the trick is it’s never yesterday and it’s
trick is it’s never yesterday and it’s
trick is it’s never yesterday and it’s never tomorrow you have to free yourself
never tomorrow you have to free yourself
never tomorrow you have to free yourself from those two things it’s only ever
from those two things it’s only ever
from those two things it’s only ever today right here right now
today right here right now
today right here right now then the do part comes in each day you
then the do part comes in each day you
then the do part comes in each day you wake up and you do it’s a verb you do
wake up and you do it’s a verb you do
wake up and you do it’s a verb you do you take action in support of your
you take action in support of your
you take action in support of your ultimate goals to achieve those
ultimate goals to achieve those
ultimate goals to achieve those intentions that you set with the power
intentions that you set with the power
intentions that you set with the power of your motivation underlying all of it
of your motivation underlying all of it
of your motivation underlying all of it because you believe that you deserve it
because you believe that you deserve it
because you believe that you deserve it and you can do better do a day there’s a
and you can do better do a day there’s a
and you can do better do a day there’s a beautiful quote from Buddha that I think
beautiful quote from Buddha that I think
beautiful quote from Buddha that I think sums it up so perfectly every morning
sums it up so perfectly every morning
sums it up so perfectly every morning we’re born again what we do today is
we’re born again what we do today is
we’re born again what we do today is what matters most so with that I want to
what matters most so with that I want to
what matters most so with that I want to remind you today is a new day please go
remind you today is a new day please go
remind you today is a new day please go out and do it thank you
out and do it thank you
out and do it thank you [Applause]
”
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