hi oh that’s loud thank you so much everyone for coming out today
everyone for coming out today
everyone for coming out today so I’m Brent Hayden grew up in Mission
so I’m Brent Hayden grew up in Mission
so I’m Brent Hayden grew up in Mission BC so in the last 10 years of my
BC so in the last 10 years of my
BC so in the last 10 years of my athletic career in Vancouver and I was
athletic career in Vancouver and I was
athletic career in Vancouver and I was an Olympic medallist I was world
an Olympic medallist I was world
an Olympic medallist I was world champion two-time Connells Games gold
champion two-time Connells Games gold
champion two-time Connells Games gold medalist current six-time Canadian
medalist current six-time Canadian
medalist current six-time Canadian record holder I held two World Records
record holder I held two World Records
record holder I held two World Records and I failed swimming lessons
so obviously success did not come come
so obviously success did not come come easily to me you could say it was
easily to me you could say it was
easily to me you could say it was actually very difficult for me to to
actually very difficult for me to to
actually very difficult for me to to find success it wasn’t just in swimming
find success it wasn’t just in swimming
find success it wasn’t just in swimming it was pretty much in everything I was
it was pretty much in everything I was
it was pretty much in everything I was doing whether it was in growing up in
doing whether it was in growing up in
doing whether it was in growing up in playing soccer or or baseball just one
playing soccer or or baseball just one
playing soccer or or baseball just one funny story about baseball actually some
funny story about baseball actually some
funny story about baseball actually some of you might relate to that some of you
of you might relate to that some of you
of you might relate to that some of you might not there’s always that one kid on
might not there’s always that one kid on
might not there’s always that one kid on the team he set out as far into the
the team he set out as far into the
the team he set out as far into the outfield as he could sit down on the
outfield as he could sit down on the
outfield as he could sit down on the grass cross-legged pulling at the grass
grass cross-legged pulling at the grass
grass cross-legged pulling at the grass up other roots putting it on his pants
up other roots putting it on his pants
up other roots putting it on his pants trying to see how big of a pile he could
trying to see how big of a pile he could
trying to see how big of a pile he could make so that was me I was I was that one
make so that was me I was I was that one
make so that was me I was I was that one kid on the team I wasn’t exactly
kid on the team I wasn’t exactly
kid on the team I wasn’t exactly everyone’s favorite team player I was
everyone’s favorite team player I was
everyone’s favorite team player I was out there cross-legged on the grass
out there cross-legged on the grass
out there cross-legged on the grass because I was afraid of failure I was
because I was afraid of failure I was
because I was afraid of failure I was afraid that if the ball came to me that
afraid that if the ball came to me that
afraid that if the ball came to me that I would screw up and that I was grew up
I would screw up and that I was grew up
I would screw up and that I was grew up for everybody else on the team so I
for everybody else on the team so I
for everybody else on the team so I figured if I just put myself away from a
figured if I just put myself away from a
figured if I just put myself away from a situation where I could be that guy that
situation where I could be that guy that
situation where I could be that guy that fails and lets the rest of the team down
fails and lets the rest of the team down
fails and lets the rest of the team down now just stay out there but there’s one
now just stay out there but there’s one
now just stay out there but there’s one time this ball actually came to me so I
time this ball actually came to me so I
time this ball actually came to me so I don’t know this kid must have made it to
don’t know this kid must have made it to
don’t know this kid must have made it to the major leagues or stolen because that
the major leagues or stolen because that
the major leagues or stolen because that was way way way out there
and the balls rolling across the grass
and the balls rolling across the grass and I’ve run out to it I pick it up and
and I’ve run out to it I pick it up and
and I’ve run out to it I pick it up and I just kind of panic I’ve never been in
I just kind of panic I’ve never been in
I just kind of panic I’ve never been in the situation before and I’m looking at
the situation before and I’m looking at
the situation before and I’m looking at the runner he’s running to first base
the runner he’s running to first base
the runner he’s running to first base and he’s run in a second I’m thinking
and he’s run in a second I’m thinking
and he’s run in a second I’m thinking like okay but I got a guy on 3rd who’s
like okay but I got a guy on 3rd who’s
like okay but I got a guy on 3rd who’s gonna run and run to the home plate so
gonna run and run to the home plate so
gonna run and run to the home plate so I’m thinking like okay where do I throw
I’m thinking like okay where do I throw
I’m thinking like okay where do I throw it and I just hear somebody probably the
it and I just hear somebody probably the
it and I just hear somebody probably the coach they just scream
coach they just scream
coach they just scream throw the ball home and so when my
throw the ball home and so when my
throw the ball home and so when my moment of panic I turn around I face the
moment of panic I turn around I face the
moment of panic I turn around I face the direction of my house and I throw the
direction of my house and I throw the
direction of my house and I throw the ball over the fence needless to say in
ball over the fence needless to say in
ball over the fence needless to say in that in that moment I failed I let the
that in that moment I failed I let the
that in that moment I failed I let the team down but I learned something I
team down but I learned something I
team down but I learned something I learned what throw the ball home meant
learned what throw the ball home meant
learned what throw the ball home meant and it was it was the same in in soccer
and it was it was the same in in soccer
and it was it was the same in in soccer I was again one of the worst kids on the
I was again one of the worst kids on the
I was again one of the worst kids on the team if not the worst kid on the team in
team if not the worst kid on the team in
team if not the worst kid on the team in my very first game I got the ball and
my very first game I got the ball and
my very first game I got the ball and I’m running with the ball and I feel
I’m running with the ball and I feel
I’m running with the ball and I feel like I’m on a breakaway and I’m feeling
like I’m on a breakaway and I’m feeling
like I’m on a breakaway and I’m feeling so proud of myself I’ve never been in
so proud of myself I’ve never been in
so proud of myself I’ve never been in this situation before you know it’s my
this situation before you know it’s my
this situation before you know it’s my first game and people just start
first game and people just start
first game and people just start screaming my name Brent Brent and it’s
screaming my name Brent Brent and it’s
screaming my name Brent Brent and it’s making me run even harder and then my
making me run even harder and then my
making me run even harder and then my own teammate comes up beside me and he
own teammate comes up beside me and he
own teammate comes up beside me and he takes the ball away from me and he runs
takes the ball away from me and he runs
takes the ball away from me and he runs in the opposite direction because nobody
in the opposite direction because nobody
in the opposite direction because nobody told me that when were in the game were
told me that when were in the game were
told me that when were in the game were supposed to shoot against the other
supposed to shoot against the other
supposed to shoot against the other goalie so I learned something I learned
goalie so I learned something I learned
goalie so I learned something I learned in the game even though you’re
in the game even though you’re
in the game even though you’re practicing shooting against their own
practicing shooting against their own
practicing shooting against their own goalie in practice you’re supposed to
goalie in practice you’re supposed to
goalie in practice you’re supposed to shoot against the other goal in the game
but we’re not born with the fear to fail
but we’re not born with the fear to fail and when we learn to walk imagine how
and when we learn to walk imagine how
and when we learn to walk imagine how far we get if every time we fell
far we get if every time we fell
far we get if every time we fell somebody pointed out at us and said you
somebody pointed out at us and said you
somebody pointed out at us and said you failed or they handed you a report card
failed or they handed you a report card
failed or they handed you a report card with an F on it no you take a step and
with an F on it no you take a step and
with an F on it no you take a step and you fall and you learn from it you get
you fall and you learn from it you get
you fall and you learn from it you get up and you try and make two more steps
up and you try and make two more steps
up and you try and make two more steps and you fall and the same thing when you
and you fall and the same thing when you
and you fall and the same thing when you when you’re right
when you’re right
when you’re right a bike you know you take the training
a bike you know you take the training
a bike you know you take the training wheels off and you’re riding around and
wheels off and you’re riding around and
wheels off and you’re riding around and you fall down and what happens when you
you fall down and what happens when you
you fall down and what happens when you fall you might get scraped up you know
fall you might get scraped up you know
fall you might get scraped up you know on your knees or your elbows you clean
on your knees or your elbows you clean
on your knees or your elbows you clean it up you put a bandaid on you learn
it up you put a bandaid on you learn
it up you put a bandaid on you learn from the mistake and you go again and in
from the mistake and you go again and in
from the mistake and you go again and in life we keep doing things this way well
life we keep doing things this way well
life we keep doing things this way well we’re learning that failure is an
we’re learning that failure is an
we’re learning that failure is an essential part of learning because your
essential part of learning because your
essential part of learning because your parents are your teachers or your coach
parents are your teachers or your coach
parents are your teachers or your coach they can tell you things so many
they can tell you things so many
they can tell you things so many different ways but until you truly
different ways but until you truly
different ways but until you truly experience the failure of that situation
experience the failure of that situation
experience the failure of that situation sometimes it’s the only way that you’re
sometimes it’s the only way that you’re
sometimes it’s the only way that you’re gonna learn to adjust when I got to my
gonna learn to adjust when I got to my
gonna learn to adjust when I got to my first Olympic Games I was I was 20 years
first Olympic Games I was I was 20 years
first Olympic Games I was I was 20 years old that’s been my whole life
old that’s been my whole life
old that’s been my whole life kind of imagining what it was going to
kind of imagining what it was going to
kind of imagining what it was going to be like to swim at the Olympics that was
be like to swim at the Olympics that was
be like to swim at the Olympics that was gonna be this huge big magical moment
gonna be this huge big magical moment
gonna be this huge big magical moment you know that everybody goes the
you know that everybody goes the
you know that everybody goes the Olympics and succeeds you know they
Olympics and succeeds you know they
Olympics and succeeds you know they might not all win a medal but at least
might not all win a medal but at least
might not all win a medal but at least they’ll all perform their best you know
they’ll all perform their best you know
they’ll all perform their best you know you spend your entire life preparing for
you spend your entire life preparing for
you spend your entire life preparing for this one moment that how do you do
this one moment that how do you do
this one moment that how do you do anything less than perform your best and
anything less than perform your best and
anything less than perform your best and I got to the Olympic Games and before
I got to the Olympic Games and before
I got to the Olympic Games and before the competition started I had already
the competition started I had already
the competition started I had already kind of jinxed myself or I pretty much
kind of jinxed myself or I pretty much
kind of jinxed myself or I pretty much already ruined what was going to be my
already ruined what was going to be my
already ruined what was going to be my competition I had this there was a power
competition I had this there was a power
competition I had this there was a power adaptor because our clocks didn’t really
adaptor because our clocks didn’t really
adaptor because our clocks didn’t really have alarm clocks yet so we still
have alarm clocks yet so we still
have alarm clocks yet so we still traveled with with them with the travel
traveled with with them with the travel
traveled with with them with the travel clocks so I had this power adapter and
clocks so I had this power adapter and
clocks so I had this power adapter and it had this high-low switch on it and I
it had this high-low switch on it and I
it had this high-low switch on it and I didn’t check it I didn’t see if it was
didn’t check it I didn’t see if it was
didn’t check it I didn’t see if it was on low or on high I just put it in the
on low or on high I just put it in the
on low or on high I just put it in the wall plugged it in set my alarm for 7:00
wall plugged it in set my alarm for 7:00
wall plugged it in set my alarm for 7:00 o’clock went to bed thinking I was gonna
o’clock went to bed thinking I was gonna
o’clock went to bed thinking I was gonna wake up at 7 o’clock not realizing that
wake up at 7 o’clock not realizing that
wake up at 7 o’clock not realizing that the setting was actually set to high so
the setting was actually set to high so
the setting was actually set to high so my clock actually ended up running extra
my clock actually ended up running extra
my clock actually ended up running extra fast so when my alarm went off I thought
fast so when my alarm went off I thought
fast so when my alarm went off I thought it was 7 o’clock I got out of bed I got
it was 7 o’clock I got out of bed I got
it was 7 o’clock I got out of bed I got my track suit on I checked my bag made
my track suit on I checked my bag made
my track suit on I checked my bag made sure I had my training suit have had my
sure I had my training suit have had my
sure I had my training suit have had my racing suit my goggles put my backpack
racing suit my goggles put my backpack
racing suit my goggles put my backpack on walked out the front door and I kind
on walked out the front door and I kind
on walked out the front door and I kind of looked up and I realized like
of looked up and I realized like
of looked up and I realized like wow it’s really dark for 7:30 you know
wow it’s really dark for 7:30 you know
wow it’s really dark for 7:30 you know by 7:30 by the time I actually got out
by 7:30 by the time I actually got out
by 7:30 by the time I actually got out the door there I was like oh well just
the door there I was like oh well just
the door there I was like oh well just kept going to the cafeteria walk all the
kept going to the cafeteria walk all the
kept going to the cafeteria walk all the way there walk into the cafeteria I’m
way there walk into the cafeteria I’m
way there walk into the cafeteria I’m looking around and nobody’s there it’s
looking around and nobody’s there it’s
looking around and nobody’s there it’s just me I’m thinking okay something is
just me I’m thinking okay something is
just me I’m thinking okay something is wrong
wrong
wrong other the Olympics already over and I
other the Olympics already over and I
other the Olympics already over and I overslept or it’s really early so so I
overslept or it’s really early so so I
overslept or it’s really early so so I pulled my phone and they call my team
pulled my phone and they call my team
pulled my phone and they call my team manager and it took me a couple tries to
manager and it took me a couple tries to
manager and it took me a couple tries to get him to answer and kind of answered
get him to answer and kind of answered
get him to answer and kind of answered his like hello like what time is it
his like hello like what time is it
his like hello like what time is it it’s 3:30 and that was pretty much the
it’s 3:30 and that was pretty much the
it’s 3:30 and that was pretty much the end of my competition right there
end of my competition right there
end of my competition right there because I I panicked my heart rate
because I I panicked my heart rate
because I I panicked my heart rate started like fluttering like crazy I
started like fluttering like crazy I
started like fluttering like crazy I went all the way to back to our dorms I
went all the way to back to our dorms I
went all the way to back to our dorms I just ripped off my shirt pants and just
just ripped off my shirt pants and just
just ripped off my shirt pants and just jumped into bed and just put my head on
jumped into bed and just put my head on
jumped into bed and just put my head on the pillow I was like okay just go to
the pillow I was like okay just go to
the pillow I was like okay just go to sleep just go sleep just go sleep just
sleep just go sleep just go sleep just
sleep just go sleep just go sleep just go sleep just go sleep if you ever try
go sleep just go sleep if you ever try
go sleep just go sleep if you ever try to go to sleep the night before
to go to sleep the night before
to go to sleep the night before Christmas when you’re a five-year-old
Christmas when you’re a five-year-old
Christmas when you’re a five-year-old kid it doesn’t work the more you try and
kid it doesn’t work the more you try and
kid it doesn’t work the more you try and tell yourself to go to sleep the more
tell yourself to go to sleep the more
tell yourself to go to sleep the more awake you become so I just basically
awake you become so I just basically
awake you become so I just basically spent the next four hours wide-awake
spent the next four hours wide-awake
spent the next four hours wide-awake dreading you know what it was that I was
dreading you know what it was that I was
dreading you know what it was that I was going to be doing because I was suddenly
going to be doing because I was suddenly
going to be doing because I was suddenly already zapped I felt like I had already
already zapped I felt like I had already
already zapped I felt like I had already done my competition so I get to the pool
done my competition so I get to the pool
done my competition so I get to the pool and I have to I’m taking power naps I’m
and I have to I’m taking power naps I’m
and I have to I’m taking power naps I’m taking over the massage table
taking over the massage table
taking over the massage table I’m just got my head on you know a bunch
I’m just got my head on you know a bunch
I’m just got my head on you know a bunch of clothes and my my bag I’m trying to
of clothes and my my bag I’m trying to
of clothes and my my bag I’m trying to sleep
sleep
sleep just trying to get some some rest in
just trying to get some some rest in
just trying to get some some rest in right before they raise my miCoach hands
right before they raise my miCoach hands
right before they raise my miCoach hands me a coke says here you need this
me a coke says here you need this
me a coke says here you need this so I chug the coke and I go to go to the
so I chug the coke and I go to go to the
so I chug the coke and I go to go to the ready room and I get up on the block’s
ready room and I get up on the block’s
ready room and I get up on the block’s and this is for this is a 4 or 4 by 2
and this is for this is a 4 or 4 by 2
and this is for this is a 4 or 4 by 2 and meter freestyle relay and I went I
and meter freestyle relay and I went I
and meter freestyle relay and I went I think about 3 seconds slower than what I
think about 3 seconds slower than what I
think about 3 seconds slower than what I just gone in Canadian Trials
just gone in Canadian Trials
just gone in Canadian Trials and we missed the medal by less than two
and we missed the medal by less than two
and we missed the medal by less than two seconds my time alone was enough to make
seconds my time alone was enough to make
seconds my time alone was enough to make up for the difference to get us onto the
up for the difference to get us onto the
up for the difference to get us onto the podium and so I became known as the
podium and so I became known as the
podium and so I became known as the single reason why the entire Canadian
single reason why the entire Canadian
single reason why the entire Canadian team left without a medal my own team
team left without a medal my own team
team left without a medal my own team may end up ended up calling me out on
may end up ended up calling me out on
may end up ended up calling me out on national television didn’t call me out
national television didn’t call me out
national television didn’t call me out by name but he says you know a very
by name but he says you know a very
by name but he says you know a very specific swimmer on this team you know
specific swimmer on this team you know
specific swimmer on this team you know didn’t really do his job and so after
didn’t really do his job and so after
didn’t really do his job and so after the games I was very very upset with
the games I was very very upset with
the games I was very very upset with myself I took some time off on the pool
myself I took some time off on the pool
myself I took some time off on the pool and I actually was contemplating
and I actually was contemplating
and I actually was contemplating quitting at this point I spent a lot of
quitting at this point I spent a lot of
quitting at this point I spent a lot of time talking to my sports psychologist I
time talking to my sports psychologist I
time talking to my sports psychologist I was having private meetings with my
was having private meetings with my
was having private meetings with my coach and I just realized that I can’t
coach and I just realized that I can’t
coach and I just realized that I can’t quit there was there is a lesson here
quit there was there is a lesson here
quit there was there is a lesson here that I need to learn okay because
that I need to learn okay because
that I need to learn okay because through my failures I’m going to learn
through my failures I’m going to learn
through my failures I’m going to learn and I’m going to adapt and I’m going to
and I’m going to adapt and I’m going to
and I’m going to adapt and I’m going to move forward and so I had four more
move forward and so I had four more
move forward and so I had four more years to make up for that mistake or to
years to make up for that mistake or to
years to make up for that mistake or to learn from that mistake and so going to
learn from that mistake and so going to
learn from that mistake and so going to the 2008 Games in Beijing now I’m a
the 2008 Games in Beijing now I’m a
the 2008 Games in Beijing now I’m a veteran I have the experience in 2007 I
veteran I have the experience in 2007 I
veteran I have the experience in 2007 I became world champion and so I’m going
became world champion and so I’m going
became world champion and so I’m going into these games now and every time I
into these games now and every time I
into these games now and every time I would you know sell my computer I google
would you know sell my computer I google
would you know sell my computer I google my name to see what people are saying
my name to see what people are saying
my name to see what people are saying about me like you know whether it’s in
about me like you know whether it’s in
about me like you know whether it’s in the province or National Post or you
the province or National Post or you
the province or National Post or you know on Facebook or people were always
know on Facebook or people were always
know on Facebook or people were always talking about the medal that I was going
talking about the medal that I was going
talking about the medal that I was going to win or you know I’m Canada’s best
to win or you know I’m Canada’s best
to win or you know I’m Canada’s best hope at getting a medal and so I was
hope at getting a medal and so I was
hope at getting a medal and so I was just they started going to my head I
just they started going to my head I
just they started going to my head I started walking around like wow I’m a
started walking around like wow I’m a
started walking around like wow I’m a world champion I’m going to become an
world champion I’m going to become an
world champion I’m going to become an Olympic medalist and I got to the game
Olympic medalist and I got to the game
Olympic medalist and I got to the game so I walked up for my semi final and I
so I walked up for my semi final and I
so I walked up for my semi final and I still had the four by two new meter
still had the four by two new meter
still had the four by two new meter freestyle relay at that same night so in
freestyle relay at that same night so in
freestyle relay at that same night so in a way I was kind of thinking okay well
a way I was kind of thinking okay well
a way I was kind of thinking okay well maybe maybe I’ll save a little bit of
maybe maybe I’ll save a little bit of
maybe maybe I’ll save a little bit of energy in this 100 freestyle semi-final
energy in this 100 freestyle semi-final
energy in this 100 freestyle semi-final I only need to come top eight I don’t
I only need to come top eight I don’t
I only need to come top eight I don’t need to succeed today I just need to
need to succeed today I just need to
need to succeed today I just need to have enough energy to do the forward
have enough energy to do the forward
have enough energy to do the forward tuner meter freestyle relay because
tuner meter freestyle relay because
tuner meter freestyle relay because that’s the relay that let everybody down
that’s the relay that let everybody down
that’s the relay that let everybody down four years ago
four years ago
four years ago and so I tried to strategize know how to
and so I tried to strategize know how to
and so I tried to strategize know how to meet her freeze down again like I don’t
meet her freeze down again like I don’t
meet her freeze down again like I don’t need to succeed today and immediately
need to succeed today and immediately
need to succeed today and immediately write off the blocks last place came up
write off the blocks last place came up
write off the blocks last place came up at the 15 meter mark started taking my
at the 15 meter mark started taking my
at the 15 meter mark started taking my first few strokes and I’m already
first few strokes and I’m already
first few strokes and I’m already looking at the guy’s feet in the lane
looking at the guy’s feet in the lane
looking at the guy’s feet in the lane next to me and I just panicked I just
next to me and I just panicked I just
next to me and I just panicked I just thought oh my god I tried to get back
thought oh my god I tried to get back
thought oh my god I tried to get back into the race I have swam that raised a
into the race I have swam that raised a
into the race I have swam that raised a hundred or even 110 percent but I
hundred or even 110 percent but I
hundred or even 110 percent but I couldn’t get back into especially when
couldn’t get back into especially when
couldn’t get back into especially when you get behind somebody’s feet and
you get behind somebody’s feet and
you get behind somebody’s feet and you’re basically fighting against their
you’re basically fighting against their
you’re basically fighting against their wake splashing over the lane kids in
wake splashing over the lane kids in
wake splashing over the lane kids in swimming you can actually draft if you
swimming you can actually draft if you
swimming you can actually draft if you get up on the wave but I was on the
get up on the wave but I was on the
get up on the wave but I was on the opposite side of that so I wasn’t quite
opposite side of that so I wasn’t quite
opposite side of that so I wasn’t quite able to to get up on it and to be able
able to to get up on it and to be able
able to to get up on it and to be able to ride that wave back into contention
to ride that wave back into contention
to ride that wave back into contention and I ended up in 12th place I didn’t
and I ended up in 12th place I didn’t
and I ended up in 12th place I didn’t have the opportunity just one 100-meter
have the opportunity just one 100-meter
have the opportunity just one 100-meter freestyle final even though I was a
freestyle final even though I was a
freestyle final even though I was a world champion but in the 4×2 and meter
world champion but in the 4×2 and meter
world champion but in the 4×2 and meter freestyle relay that night I was I was
freestyle relay that night I was I was
freestyle relay that night I was I was fired up I guess you could say I was
fired up I guess you could say I was
fired up I guess you could say I was kind of angry at myself and I dove into
kind of angry at myself and I dove into
kind of angry at myself and I dove into the pool I was the third leg of the
the pool I was the third leg of the
the pool I was the third leg of the relay when I dove in we were in seventh
relay when I dove in we were in seventh
relay when I dove in we were in seventh place when I touched the wall I brought
place when I touched the wall I brought
place when I touched the wall I brought us back into second all because of what
us back into second all because of what
us back into second all because of what that failure earlier in that day did for
that failure earlier in that day did for
that failure earlier in that day did for me they got me angry and made me realize
me they got me angry and made me realize
me they got me angry and made me realize how unacceptable not trying to succeed
how unacceptable not trying to succeed
how unacceptable not trying to succeed was trying to strategize when you need
was trying to strategize when you need
was trying to strategize when you need it to go and we ended up fifth but I
it to go and we ended up fifth but I
it to go and we ended up fifth but I couldn’t be more proud of our team’s
couldn’t be more proud of our team’s
couldn’t be more proud of our team’s accomplishment because on paper we
accomplishment because on paper we
accomplishment because on paper we probably shouldn’t have even come fifth
probably shouldn’t have even come fifth
probably shouldn’t have even come fifth so there was a huge success
so there was a huge success
so there was a huge success not all successes are measured in wins
not all successes are measured in wins
not all successes are measured in wins and losses sometimes your successes are
and losses sometimes your successes are
and losses sometimes your successes are measured by your own performance so for
measured by your own performance so for
measured by your own performance so for my hundred meter freestyle I didn’t
my hundred meter freestyle I didn’t
my hundred meter freestyle I didn’t perform but I know I performed in my 4×2
perform but I know I performed in my 4×2
perform but I know I performed in my 4×2 Noor meter freestyle relay and I didn’t
Noor meter freestyle relay and I didn’t
Noor meter freestyle relay and I didn’t let my team down but I had to take two
let my team down but I had to take two
let my team down but I had to take two months off after those games two months
months off after those games two months
months off after those games two months because I was still so heartbroken over
because I was still so heartbroken over
because I was still so heartbroken over what transpired in the hundred meter
what transpired in the hundred meter
what transpired in the hundred meter freestyle
freestyle
freestyle that I had a chance to become Canada’s
that I had a chance to become Canada’s
that I had a chance to become Canada’s first-ever medalist
first-ever medalist
first-ever medalist in the hundred meter freestyle I even
in the hundred meter freestyle I even
in the hundred meter freestyle I even had a chance to win gold but I didn’t
had a chance to win gold but I didn’t
had a chance to win gold but I didn’t try to succeed I thought I would do that
try to succeed I thought I would do that
try to succeed I thought I would do that the next day I also realized another
the next day I also realized another
the next day I also realized another mistake that I made I was expecting to
mistake that I made I was expecting to
mistake that I made I was expecting to succeed now sometimes when you expect to
succeed now sometimes when you expect to
succeed now sometimes when you expect to succeed that is often when you’re gonna
succeed that is often when you’re gonna
succeed that is often when you’re gonna fail I’m sure some of you can relate to
fail I’m sure some of you can relate to
fail I’m sure some of you can relate to this you’re expecting a certain result
this you’re expecting a certain result
this you’re expecting a certain result and you go in thinking that it’s just
and you go in thinking that it’s just
and you go in thinking that it’s just gonna happen because you’re prepared
gonna happen because you’re prepared
gonna happen because you’re prepared you’ve done all the hard work it’s just
you’ve done all the hard work it’s just
you’ve done all the hard work it’s just gonna happen and then it doesn’t and
gonna happen and then it doesn’t and
gonna happen and then it doesn’t and then you also had moments where you kind
then you also had moments where you kind
then you also had moments where you kind of just don’t expect anything and that’s
of just don’t expect anything and that’s
of just don’t expect anything and that’s also when you succeed okay so in that
also when you succeed okay so in that
also when you succeed okay so in that moment the failure came down on me and
moment the failure came down on me and
moment the failure came down on me and it told me you can’t expect success you
it told me you can’t expect success you
it told me you can’t expect success you have to be determined to make it happen
have to be determined to make it happen
have to be determined to make it happen so I spent the next four years making up
so I spent the next four years making up
so I spent the next four years making up for this other mistake made their team
for this other mistake made their team
for this other mistake made their team again so I had a third a third time and
again so I had a third a third time and
again so I had a third a third time and started thinking well maybe third time
started thinking well maybe third time
started thinking well maybe third time will be my charm but two weeks before
will be my charm but two weeks before
will be my charm but two weeks before the games were staging in obeah Italy
the games were staging in obeah Italy
the games were staging in obeah Italy and two weeks before the games I
and two weeks before the games I
and two weeks before the games I suffered a back spasm now I’ve been
suffered a back spasm now I’ve been
suffered a back spasm now I’ve been plagued over the last four years at this
plagued over the last four years at this
plagued over the last four years at this point by these chronic back spasms and
point by these chronic back spasms and
point by these chronic back spasms and they would take me out of the water from
they would take me out of the water from
they would take me out of the water from midday maybe two but I would still be
midday maybe two but I would still be
midday maybe two but I would still be able to walk around and do things so I
able to walk around and do things so I
able to walk around and do things so I was never fully you say sidelined I’ll
was never fully you say sidelined I’ll
was never fully you say sidelined I’ll just kind of take a break walk it off
just kind of take a break walk it off
just kind of take a break walk it off and I get back in the next day but this
and I get back in the next day but this
and I get back in the next day but this bad one was so bad I spent four days
bad one was so bad I spent four days
bad one was so bad I spent four days barely able to walk my workouts two
barely able to walk my workouts two
barely able to walk my workouts two weeks before the Olympic Games was just
weeks before the Olympic Games was just
weeks before the Olympic Games was just trying to walk at the end of my hallway
trying to walk at the end of my hallway
trying to walk at the end of my hallway every day I was getting massage therapy
every day I was getting massage therapy
every day I was getting massage therapy physiotherapy getting my chiropractic
physiotherapy getting my chiropractic
physiotherapy getting my chiropractic but nothing was working my back just
but nothing was working my back just
but nothing was working my back just wouldn’t loosen up but on the fourth day
wouldn’t loosen up but on the fourth day
wouldn’t loosen up but on the fourth day I made myself go to the pool because I
I made myself go to the pool because I
I made myself go to the pool because I decided that if I can’t make it happen
decided that if I can’t make it happen
decided that if I can’t make it happen I’ll just fake it I’ll act as if
I’ll just fake it I’ll act as if
I’ll just fake it I’ll act as if everything is okay and I’m just going to
everything is okay and I’m just going to
everything is okay and I’m just going to get myself back into the process and so
get myself back into the process and so
get myself back into the process and so I went to the pool very slowly and I’m
I went to the pool very slowly and I’m
I went to the pool very slowly and I’m there on the pool deck I’m nice I can
there on the pool deck I’m nice I can
there on the pool deck I’m nice I can see my coach looking at me
see my coach looking at me
see my coach looking at me and looks at me and goes okay what’s up
and looks at me and goes okay what’s up
and looks at me and goes okay what’s up I look at him it’s just this thought
I look at him it’s just this thought
I look at him it’s just this thought that had been popping to the back of my
that had been popping to the back of my
that had been popping to the back of my head over the last four day it was
head over the last four day it was
head over the last four day it was getting louder and louder and louder and
getting louder and louder and louder and
getting louder and louder and louder and I just looked at him and I said I don’t
I just looked at him and I said I don’t
I just looked at him and I said I don’t want to retire before the Olympics and
want to retire before the Olympics and
want to retire before the Olympics and he says why don’t you you see I had had
he says why don’t you you see I had had
he says why don’t you you see I had had this fear of failure popping back into
this fear of failure popping back into
this fear of failure popping back into my head right before I was never really
my head right before I was never really
my head right before I was never really that afraid of failure it’s always just
that afraid of failure it’s always just
that afraid of failure it’s always just been again it’s always been an essential
been again it’s always been an essential
been again it’s always been an essential part of learning as much as you don’t
part of learning as much as you don’t
part of learning as much as you don’t like to fail it but it’s just kind of a
like to fail it but it’s just kind of a
like to fail it but it’s just kind of a part of the process and every time I
part of the process and every time I
part of the process and every time I failed I’ve always learned it but I was
failed I’ve always learned it but I was
failed I’ve always learned it but I was inherently fearful of failing again in
inherently fearful of failing again in
inherently fearful of failing again in front of everybody that I was starting
front of everybody that I was starting
front of everybody that I was starting to think that maybe it would be better
to think that maybe it would be better
to think that maybe it would be better if I just walked away pulled myself away
if I just walked away pulled myself away
if I just walked away pulled myself away from the equation I became becoming that
from the equation I became becoming that
from the equation I became becoming that kid sitting wet in the outfield again
kid sitting wet in the outfield again
kid sitting wet in the outfield again and when he said why don’t you it just
and when he said why don’t you it just
and when he said why don’t you it just made me erupted I just I essentially
made me erupted I just I essentially
made me erupted I just I essentially just blew up in anger he wasn’t telling
just blew up in anger he wasn’t telling
just blew up in anger he wasn’t telling me what I wanted to hear but he was
me what I wanted to hear but he was
me what I wanted to hear but he was telling me what I needed to hear he
telling me what I needed to hear he
telling me what I needed to hear he needed me to face that thought in my
needed me to face that thought in my
needed me to face that thought in my head and within two days my back was
head and within two days my back was
head and within two days my back was better I was training perfectly and I
better I was training perfectly and I
better I was training perfectly and I was off to the Olympic Games now I went
was off to the Olympic Games now I went
was off to the Olympic Games now I went up to that semi-final and I realize that
up to that semi-final and I realize that
up to that semi-final and I realize that I have to swim this race like it’s my
I have to swim this race like it’s my
I have to swim this race like it’s my last because I know that there’s not
last because I know that there’s not
last because I know that there’s not every day’s you’re gonna have another
every day’s you’re gonna have another
every day’s you’re gonna have another opportunity so I swam that race like it
opportunity so I swam that race like it
opportunity so I swam that race like it was going to be my last and I got into
was going to be my last and I got into
was going to be my last and I got into the final came in sixth place I was
the final came in sixth place I was
the final came in sixth place I was two-tenths from not making the final
two-tenths from not making the final
two-tenths from not making the final where as four years earlier I was too
where as four years earlier I was too
where as four years earlier I was too tense from also not making the final but
tense from also not making the final but
tense from also not making the final but on the other side of it so this time
on the other side of it so this time
on the other side of it so this time going into the final realizing that this
going into the final realizing that this
going into the final realizing that this is my last chance I had nothing else to
is my last chance I had nothing else to
is my last chance I had nothing else to to swim for except my entire life behind
to swim for except my entire life behind
to swim for except my entire life behind me and everything all my failures that
me and everything all my failures that
me and everything all my failures that have been building me up to this moment
have been building me up to this moment
have been building me up to this moment from what happened in Athens the
from what happened in Athens the
from what happened in Athens the failures learning from it learning from
failures learning from it learning from
failures learning from it learning from my failures in Beijing moving forward
my failures in Beijing moving forward
my failures in Beijing moving forward all my strengths or all my weaknesses
all my strengths or all my weaknesses
all my strengths or all my weaknesses were now my strengths by the time I got
were now my strengths by the time I got
were now my strengths by the time I got to London I had experienced every level
to London I had experienced every level
to London I had experienced every level of failure that nothing was going to be
of failure that nothing was going to be
of failure that nothing was going to be able to stop me I was five years older
able to stop me I was five years older
able to stop me I was five years older than any of the other swimmers I wasn’t
than any of the other swimmers I wasn’t
than any of the other swimmers I wasn’t able to walk for four days two weeks ago
able to walk for four days two weeks ago
able to walk for four days two weeks ago and that is when I had my most success
and that is when I had my most success
and that is when I had my most success and when I got my bronze medal so
and when I got my bronze medal so
and when I got my bronze medal so there’s there is a quote by Thomas
there’s there is a quote by Thomas
there’s there is a quote by Thomas Edison they asked him when you failed so
Edison they asked him when you failed so
Edison they asked him when you failed so many times making her light bulb why
many times making her light bulb why
many times making her light bulb why didn’t you just give up and he said I’ve
didn’t you just give up and he said I’ve
didn’t you just give up and he said I’ve never failed
never failed
never failed I just learned 10,000 ways that won’t
I just learned 10,000 ways that won’t
I just learned 10,000 ways that won’t work so we shouldn’t fear failure we
work so we shouldn’t fear failure we
work so we shouldn’t fear failure we should embrace failure as the most
should embrace failure as the most
should embrace failure as the most honest teacher the most honest coach the
honest teacher the most honest coach the
honest teacher the most honest coach the most honest peer that we’re ever going
most honest peer that we’re ever going
most honest peer that we’re ever going to have because like my coche failure
to have because like my coche failure
to have because like my coche failure will always tell you what you need to
will always tell you what you need to
will always tell you what you need to hear thank you
”
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