it’s in my bones to be friendly I love connecting and helping in the spring of
connecting and helping in the spring of
connecting and helping in the spring of 2015 I enroll in a Buddhist Chaplaincy
2015 I enroll in a Buddhist Chaplaincy
2015 I enroll in a Buddhist Chaplaincy program to weave the heart of service
program to weave the heart of service
program to weave the heart of service more deeply into my life around the same
more deeply into my life around the same
more deeply into my life around the same time I get a job at REI it feels like a
time I get a job at REI it feels like a
time I get a job at REI it feels like a perfect fit my love of people and my
perfect fit my love of people and my
perfect fit my love of people and my love of adventure wrapped together the
love of adventure wrapped together the
love of adventure wrapped together the Chaplaincy program is a master’s level
Chaplaincy program is a master’s level
Chaplaincy program is a master’s level thesis driven program and I plan to
thesis driven program and I plan to
thesis driven program and I plan to write about climate change as my
write about climate change as my
write about climate change as my understanding of the nature of suffering
understanding of the nature of suffering
understanding of the nature of suffering grew I noticed something working in the
grew I noticed something working in the
grew I noticed something working in the service industry was challenging I would
service industry was challenging I would
service industry was challenging I would come home worn out my feet ached all I
come home worn out my feet ached all I
come home worn out my feet ached all I wanted was a beer I reality checked my
wanted was a beer I reality checked my
wanted was a beer I reality checked my feelings to see if customer service was
feelings to see if customer service was
feelings to see if customer service was hard for just me or if it was a shared
hard for just me or if it was a shared
hard for just me or if it was a shared experience I asked my coworkers three
experience I asked my coworkers three
experience I asked my coworkers three important questions hey is this job
important questions hey is this job
important questions hey is this job tiring for you and I would get replies
tiring for you and I would get replies
tiring for you and I would get replies like after working this week I’m dead
like after working this week I’m dead
like after working this week I’m dead inside
do you feel any shame working this job
do you feel any shame working this job and one girl began to cry and a man
and one girl began to cry and a man
and one girl began to cry and a man looked away how do you take the edge off
looked away how do you take the edge off
looked away how do you take the edge off and people would talk about coming to
and people would talk about coming to
and people would talk about coming to work high or hungover I was compelled to
work high or hungover I was compelled to
work high or hungover I was compelled to write my thesis on the hardship I saw
write my thesis on the hardship I saw
write my thesis on the hardship I saw all around me I researched 10 months 55
all around me I researched 10 months 55
all around me I researched 10 months 55 written pages in over a hundred
written pages in over a hundred
written pages in over a hundred references I took a deep dive one of the
references I took a deep dive one of the
references I took a deep dive one of the first things I found is that our
first things I found is that our
first things I found is that our definition of the working class is
definition of the working class is
definition of the working class is outdated working class conjures up
outdated working class conjures up
outdated working class conjures up images of men in factories coal miners
images of men in factories coal miners
images of men in factories coal miners hard honorable work making something and
hard honorable work making something and
hard honorable work making something and earning a decent wage this was true in
earning a decent wage this was true in
earning a decent wage this was true in the 1940s but today due to automation
the 1940s but today due to automation
the 1940s but today due to automation deregulation and globalization these
deregulation and globalization these
deregulation and globalization these jobs make up less than 10% of the
jobs make up less than 10% of the
jobs make up less than 10% of the workforce the new working class are
workforce the new working class are
workforce the new working class are service professionals with some refer to
service professionals with some refer to
service professionals with some refer to as pink collar work retail is the
as pink collar work retail is the
as pink collar work retail is the largest occupation the US
largest occupation the US
largest occupation the US followed by cashiers and food service
followed by cashiers and food service
followed by cashiers and food service these aren’t just teenagers or college
these aren’t just teenagers or college
these aren’t just teenagers or college students this is the main occupation for
students this is the main occupation for
students this is the main occupation for millions of Americans the average income
millions of Americans the average income
millions of Americans the average income of these jobs fall well below the
of these jobs fall well below the
of these jobs fall well below the average national income of $50,000 a
average national income of $50,000 a
average national income of $50,000 a year the livable wage for two working
year the livable wage for two working
year the livable wage for two working adults and two children is $65,000 that
adults and two children is $65,000 that
adults and two children is $65,000 that family needs to work nearly four
family needs to work nearly four
family needs to work nearly four full-time minimum-wage jobs or 78 hour
full-time minimum-wage jobs or 78 hour
full-time minimum-wage jobs or 78 hour work week per working adult to earn a
work week per working adult to earn a
work week per working adult to earn a living wage
living wage
living wage the reality is two of every five US
the reality is two of every five US
the reality is two of every five US workers make less than $15 an hour we
workers make less than $15 an hour we
workers make less than $15 an hour we don’t live in a knowledge economy we
don’t live in a knowledge economy we
don’t live in a knowledge economy we live in a low-wage economy grocers
live in a low-wage economy grocers
live in a low-wage economy grocers retail workers home health aides
retail workers home health aides
retail workers home health aides baristas waiters waitresses
baristas waiters waitresses
baristas waiters waitresses and fast-food workers these people are
and fast-food workers these people are
and fast-food workers these people are the working class so on the one hand we
the working class so on the one hand we
the working class so on the one hand we have this huge population of people
have this huge population of people
have this huge population of people struggling to make ends meet but we
struggling to make ends meet but we
struggling to make ends meet but we forget that customer service can be
forget that customer service can be
forget that customer service can be emotionally draining the phenomenon is
emotionally draining the phenomenon is
emotionally draining the phenomenon is well documented and it’s called
well documented and it’s called
well documented and it’s called emotional labor emotional labor is the
emotional labor emotional labor is the
emotional labor emotional labor is the management of feeling to create a
management of feeling to create a
management of feeling to create a publicly observable facial and bodily
publicly observable facial and bodily
publicly observable facial and bodily display physical labor harnesses
display physical labor harnesses
display physical labor harnesses employees strengths while emotional
employees strengths while emotional
employees strengths while emotional labor uses employees expressions and
labor uses employees expressions and
labor uses employees expressions and emotions to meet workplace goals this
emotions to meet workplace goals this
emotions to meet workplace goals this can draw on our deepest sense of self
can draw on our deepest sense of self
can draw on our deepest sense of self for service employees company manuals
for service employees company manuals
for service employees company manuals dictate emotion requirements think
dictate emotion requirements think
dictate emotion requirements think service with a smile
emotion regulation is the effort to
emotion regulation is the effort to match emotion requirements at work there
match emotion requirements at work there
match emotion requirements at work there are two emotional labor strategies
are two emotional labor strategies
are two emotional labor strategies surface acting and deep acting surface
surface acting and deep acting surface
surface acting and deep acting surface acting is response focused it’s putting
acting is response focused it’s putting
acting is response focused it’s putting on a mask suppressing negative feelings
on a mask suppressing negative feelings
on a mask suppressing negative feelings to create expected positivity say I’m at
to create expected positivity say I’m at
to create expected positivity say I’m at work and approach a guest hello how’s it
work and approach a guest hello how’s it
work and approach a guest hello how’s it going today and the response is just
going today and the response is just
going today and the response is just looking let me tell you what that feels
looking let me tell you what that feels
looking let me tell you what that feels like
like
like rejection when you were young did
rejection when you were young did
rejection when you were young did ever ask another kid to play with you
ever ask another kid to play with you
ever ask another kid to play with you and that kid just said no you’re gross
over time I’ve learned not to take it
over time I’ve learned not to take it personally and I’ve given up on asking
personally and I’ve given up on asking
personally and I’ve given up on asking how people are doing daily surface
how people are doing daily surface
how people are doing daily surface acting has been linked to increases in
acting has been linked to increases in
acting has been linked to increases in anxiety tension burnouts sleep problems
anxiety tension burnouts sleep problems
anxiety tension burnouts sleep problems substance abuse and is most damaging if
substance abuse and is most damaging if
substance abuse and is most damaging if active behaviors violates who you think
active behaviors violates who you think
active behaviors violates who you think you are the second strategy is deep
you are the second strategy is deep
you are the second strategy is deep acting which determines felt emotion
acting which determines felt emotion
acting which determines felt emotion like thinking happy thoughts it helps
like thinking happy thoughts it helps
like thinking happy thoughts it helps reduce strain but it’s still associated
reduce strain but it’s still associated
reduce strain but it’s still associated with exhaustion requires more effort
with exhaustion requires more effort
with exhaustion requires more effort than authentic expression deep acting
than authentic expression deep acting
than authentic expression deep acting comes with its social stories about what
comes with its social stories about what
comes with its social stories about what we aspire to feel and may involve
we aspire to feel and may involve
we aspire to feel and may involve deceiving oneself as much as deceiving
deceiving oneself as much as deceiving
deceiving oneself as much as deceiving others so what can we do as employees
others so what can we do as employees
others so what can we do as employees take ownership of your experience
take ownership of your experience
take ownership of your experience one way is job crafting or changing work
one way is job crafting or changing work
one way is job crafting or changing work tasks relationships and the meaning you
tasks relationships and the meaning you
tasks relationships and the meaning you give your work maybe it’s learning a new
give your work maybe it’s learning a new
give your work maybe it’s learning a new skill that requires less interaction or
skill that requires less interaction or
skill that requires less interaction or even joining the fight for 15 movement
even joining the fight for 15 movement
even joining the fight for 15 movement we have a choice and whether review our
we have a choice and whether review our
we have a choice and whether review our own well-being as a workable challenge
own well-being as a workable challenge
own well-being as a workable challenge or get lots into spirals towards
or get lots into spirals towards
or get lots into spirals towards depression and burnout as customers
depression and burnout as customers
depression and burnout as customers perhaps most important is to remember
perhaps most important is to remember
perhaps most important is to remember that people working in the service
that people working in the service
that people working in the service industry are people first enrolls second
industry are people first enrolls second
industry are people first enrolls second practice treating people like people
practice treating people like people
practice treating people like people make eye contact respond to the question
make eye contact respond to the question
make eye contact respond to the question your ass and if you’re feeling really
your ass and if you’re feeling really
your ass and if you’re feeling really outgoing ask how their day is going and
outgoing ask how their day is going and
outgoing ask how their day is going and stop to listen I have a story that gets
stop to listen I have a story that gets
stop to listen I have a story that gets to the heart of this so I’m working in
to the heart of this so I’m working in
to the heart of this so I’m working in the footwear department and there’s a
the footwear department and there’s a
the footwear department and there’s a man who’s being a jerk I’m frustrated I
man who’s being a jerk I’m frustrated I
man who’s being a jerk I’m frustrated I go in the back and take a breath I
go in the back and take a breath I
go in the back and take a breath I remember as chaplains we choose to
remember as chaplains we choose to
remember as chaplains we choose to connect I go back out and ask him why do
connect I go back out and ask him why do
connect I go back out and ask him why do you mean new boots he looks up and says
you mean new boots he looks up and says
you mean new boots he looks up and says I’m going on a trek in Nepal to honor
I’m going on a trek in Nepal to honor
I’m going on a trek in Nepal to honor the past you know my son’s life he
the past you know my son’s life he
the past you know my son’s life he explained that his son died in a
explained that his son died in a
explained that his son died in a mountaineering accident and it became
mountaineering accident and it became
mountaineering accident and it became clear he blamed himself he wasn’t a jerk
clear he blamed himself he wasn’t a jerk
clear he blamed himself he wasn’t a jerk he was a grieving father as we talked he
he was a grieving father as we talked he
he was a grieving father as we talked he sat up straighter made eye contact we
sat up straighter made eye contact we
sat up straighter made eye contact we were with each other and this is where
were with each other and this is where
were with each other and this is where the magic really is connection we can
the magic really is connection we can
the magic really is connection we can operate out of belief that interactions
operate out of belief that interactions
operate out of belief that interactions are just transactional just another
are just transactional just another
are just transactional just another customer just another waiter just in the
customer just another waiter just in the
customer just another waiter just in the other what happens when we take the risk
other what happens when we take the risk
other what happens when we take the risk to move beyond our safe predictable
to move beyond our safe predictable
to move beyond our safe predictable roles really meaning whomever we’re with
roles really meaning whomever we’re with
roles really meaning whomever we’re with I practice this by staying present to my
I practice this by staying present to my
I practice this by staying present to my felt experience I’m remembering my
felt experience I’m remembering my
felt experience I’m remembering my intention to connect when I connect with
intention to connect when I connect with
intention to connect when I connect with myself as a living breathing person and
myself as a living breathing person and
myself as a living breathing person and not just a retail robots and I tell a
not just a retail robots and I tell a
not just a retail robots and I tell a customer I’m not good I’m actually tired
customer I’m not good I’m actually tired
customer I’m not good I’m actually tired or I can’t to carry more than eight shoe
or I can’t to carry more than eight shoe
or I can’t to carry more than eight shoe boxes at a time everyone softens usually
boxes at a time everyone softens usually
boxes at a time everyone softens usually we joke and relax a bit those moments
we joke and relax a bit those moments
we joke and relax a bit those moments when we meet one another are more
when we meet one another are more
when we meet one another are more precious than any twenty percent off
precious than any twenty percent off
precious than any twenty percent off coupon or I’ll try and connect and it’s
coupon or I’ll try and connect and it’s
coupon or I’ll try and connect and it’s disappointing when I reach out to you
disappointing when I reach out to you
disappointing when I reach out to you with honesty and we just miss that’s
with honesty and we just miss that’s
with honesty and we just miss that’s important too it’s a good reminder to
important too it’s a good reminder to
important too it’s a good reminder to let go of expectation when we
let go of expectation when we
let go of expectation when we acknowledge our own and others humanity
acknowledge our own and others humanity
acknowledge our own and others humanity everyone notices pay attention to who
everyone notices pay attention to who
everyone notices pay attention to who you turn towards and who you turn away
you turn towards and who you turn away
you turn towards and who you turn away from and please be gentle with yourself
from and please be gentle with yourself
from and please be gentle with yourself opening to each moment is a continuous
opening to each moment is a continuous
opening to each moment is a continuous lifelong practice the process is the
lifelong practice the process is the
lifelong practice the process is the goal
goal
goal appreciate that none of us are living
appreciate that none of us are living
appreciate that none of us are living one-dimensional stories thank you
one-dimensional stories thank you
one-dimensional stories thank you [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] you
”
Be First to Comment