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Effecting change through listening | Henry Kwek | TEDxPickeringStreet


good afternoon everybody my name is

good afternoon everybody my name is Henry I’m here to talk about effective

Henry I’m here to talk about effective

Henry I’m here to talk about effective effecting change through listening many

effecting change through listening many

effecting change through listening many of us be sitting here are changemakers

of us be sitting here are changemakers

of us be sitting here are changemakers and when we want to make change we have

and when we want to make change we have

and when we want to make change we have a lot of passion I’ll say that a

a lot of passion I’ll say that a

a lot of passion I’ll say that a defining characteristics of a change

defining characteristics of a change

defining characteristics of a change maker is somebody who have a very strong

maker is somebody who have a very strong

maker is somebody who have a very strong view on what they want to see in the

view on what they want to see in the

view on what they want to see in the world and they go in to try to make that

world and they go in to try to make that

world and they go in to try to make that change a bit more mark myself I started

change a bit more mark myself I started

change a bit more mark myself I started as a volunteer since I was a student in

as a volunteer since I was a student in

as a volunteer since I was a student in 2015 I was elected member of parliament

2015 I was elected member of parliament

2015 I was elected member of parliament and a neighbor called urban borough

and a neighbor called urban borough

and a neighbor called urban borough Herman Barrow is a constituency of

Herman Barrow is a constituency of

Herman Barrow is a constituency of 40,000 residents and like many other

40,000 residents and like many other

40,000 residents and like many other places we have the needy among our myths

places we have the needy among our myths

places we have the needy among our myths and what I do is that together with

and what I do is that together with

and what I do is that together with hundreds of volunteers and professional

hundreds of volunteers and professional

hundreds of volunteers and professional social workers we try to help the needy

social workers we try to help the needy

social workers we try to help the needy so today I’m here to talk to you not in

so today I’m here to talk to you not in

so today I’m here to talk to you not in my capacity as a member of parliament

my capacity as a member of parliament

my capacity as a member of parliament but in my capacity like you being a

but in my capacity like you being a

but in my capacity like you being a change maker now the traditional concept

change maker now the traditional concept

change maker now the traditional concept of change making is to come in guns

of change making is to come in guns

of change making is to come in guns blazing and in fact change but even at

blazing and in fact change but even at

blazing and in fact change but even at best this approach have limitations

best this approach have limitations

best this approach have limitations why because even if we succeed we are at

why because even if we succeed we are at

why because even if we succeed we are at best

best

best artificial touches that the community

artificial touches that the community

artificial touches that the community would rely on which means that if we

would rely on which means that if we

would rely on which means that if we exit from the scene the change might not

exit from the scene the change might not

exit from the scene the change might not be sustained rather I see a better way

be sustained rather I see a better way

be sustained rather I see a better way of effecting change is for us as Street

of effecting change is for us as Street

of effecting change is for us as Street makers to come in

makers to come in

makers to come in unleash the energy within a community

unleash the energy within a community

unleash the energy within a community unleash it because within the community

unleash it because within the community

unleash it because within the community is not just just the needy but the

is not just just the needy but the

is not just just the needy but the capacity for change and the wisdom to do

capacity for change and the wisdom to do

capacity for change and the wisdom to do that and the way to unleash this is by

that and the way to unleash this is by

that and the way to unleash this is by listening by listening to our

listening by listening to our

listening by listening to our beneficiaries by listening to the

beneficiaries by listening to the

beneficiaries by listening to the community and by listening to the

community and by listening to the

community and by listening to the changemakers with it let me share with

changemakers with it let me share with

changemakers with it let me share with you a particular experience that I’m

you a particular experience that I’m

you a particular experience that I’m sure it resonates with many of you one

sure it resonates with many of you one

sure it resonates with many of you one day

day

day after a very long extensive effort to

after a very long extensive effort to

after a very long extensive effort to distribute groceries to many of our

distribute groceries to many of our

distribute groceries to many of our needy a few of our volunteers and myself

needy a few of our volunteers and myself

needy a few of our volunteers and myself sat down at a coffee shop

sat down at a coffee shop

sat down at a coffee shop suddenly one of our volunteers Marilyn

suddenly one of our volunteers Marilyn

suddenly one of our volunteers Marilyn she said this looked at this out

she said this looked at this out

she said this looked at this out unconsciously Henry how many cigarettes

unconsciously Henry how many cigarettes

unconsciously Henry how many cigarettes do we end up paying for today are we

do we end up paying for today are we

do we end up paying for today are we helping them are we killing them what

helping them are we killing them what

helping them are we killing them what does she mean by that well some of you

does she mean by that well some of you

does she mean by that well some of you may be aware that we give out groceries

may be aware that we give out groceries

may be aware that we give out groceries we could give out grocery belches to the

we could give out grocery belches to the

we could give out grocery belches to the needy in Singapore but what sometimes

needy in Singapore but what sometimes

needy in Singapore but what sometimes happened in some cases is that some of

happened in some cases is that some of

happened in some cases is that some of the beneficiaries they take that

the beneficiaries they take that

the beneficiaries they take that vouchers that grocery voucher and then

vouchers that grocery voucher and then

vouchers that grocery voucher and then they buy cigarettes and in the berry

they buy cigarettes and in the berry

they buy cigarettes and in the berry beer and they drink away and smoke away

beer and they drink away and smoke away

beer and they drink away and smoke away so that kind of behavior made our

so that kind of behavior made our

so that kind of behavior made our volunteers disillusioned they wonder

volunteers disillusioned they wonder

volunteers disillusioned they wonder whether or not they are helping the

whether or not they are helping the

whether or not they are helping the right people they wonder whether they

right people they wonder whether they

right people they wonder whether they are helping people in the right way so

at that point I tried to reassure them

at that point I tried to reassure them that we’re doing things the right way

that we’re doing things the right way

that we’re doing things the right way but in my heart of hearts I do know that

but in my heart of hearts I do know that

but in my heart of hearts I do know that I had no answer

so then I spent months working by

so then I spent months working by volunteers to experiment different ways

volunteers to experiment different ways

volunteers to experiment different ways Charles and errors and we realized that

Charles and errors and we realized that

Charles and errors and we realized that the power is really true the power of

the power is really true the power of

the power is really true the power of listening three ways listen to the

listening three ways listen to the

listening three ways listen to the community since 2015 I’ve gone through

community since 2015 I’ve gone through

community since 2015 I’ve gone through every household of kaboom borrow my

every household of kaboom borrow my

every household of kaboom borrow my constituency at least three times when I

constituency at least three times when I

constituency at least three times when I go there and visit with my volunteers

go there and visit with my volunteers

go there and visit with my volunteers what we do is rather than just say hi

what we do is rather than just say hi

what we do is rather than just say hi and bye we try to understand our

and bye we try to understand our

and bye we try to understand our neighbors our residents who lives there

neighbors our residents who lives there

neighbors our residents who lives there what did they do what a needy among this

what did they do what a needy among this

what did they do what a needy among this block where are the socially isolated

block where are the socially isolated

block where are the socially isolated elderly state where are the

elderly state where are the

elderly state where are the special-needs children staying where are

special-needs children staying where are

special-needs children staying where are the people of financial difficulties

the people of financial difficulties

the people of financial difficulties trained and what we do is also to stop

trained and what we do is also to stop

trained and what we do is also to stop take the community resources for example

take the community resources for example

take the community resources for example where the teachers stay who’s the former

where the teachers stay who’s the former

where the teachers stay who’s the former policeman who’s the taxi driver who are

policeman who’s the taxi driver who are

policeman who’s the taxi driver who are the nurses who wants to step forward and

the nurses who wants to step forward and

the nurses who wants to step forward and help our community and when we have to

help our community and when we have to

help our community and when we have to understand the needs of our community we

understand the needs of our community we

understand the needs of our community we then can come up with very specific

then can come up with very specific

then can come up with very specific programs in the last one year let me

programs in the last one year let me

programs in the last one year let me give you some examples we can offer free

give you some examples we can offer free

give you some examples we can offer free legal clinic for residents we came up

legal clinic for residents we came up

legal clinic for residents we came up with home delivery service of cooked

with home delivery service of cooked

with home delivery service of cooked food to the frail elderly we came up

food to the frail elderly we came up

food to the frail elderly we came up with uplifting programs for the young

with uplifting programs for the young

with uplifting programs for the young poor so and many other more but what is

poor so and many other more but what is

poor so and many other more but what is more precious than this program is it

more precious than this program is it

more precious than this program is it stems the flood of disillusionment among

stems the flood of disillusionment among

stems the flood of disillusionment among the volunteers and we actually were

the volunteers and we actually were

the volunteers and we actually were dealing with a flood of volunteers

dealing with a flood of volunteers

dealing with a flood of volunteers coming in and it also aligns everybody’s

coming in and it also aligns everybody’s

coming in and it also aligns everybody’s vision because we as a group were out

vision because we as a group were out

vision because we as a group were out there listening to our community and

there listening to our community and

there listening to our community and so the community through the same lenses

so the community through the same lenses

so the community through the same lenses so that was the first point about

so that was the first point about

so that was the first point about listening to the community the second

listening to the community the second

listening to the community the second point I’d like to make is listening to

point I’d like to make is listening to

point I’d like to make is listening to the beneficiaries this is a picture of

the beneficiaries this is a picture of

the beneficiaries this is a picture of madame ism she’s the lady in the middle

madame ism she’s the lady in the middle

madame ism she’s the lady in the middle she has three she’s a single mother she

she has three she’s a single mother she

she has three she’s a single mother she has three young kids and she has an

has three young kids and she has an

has three young kids and she has an ailing mother on the other side we

ailing mother on the other side we

ailing mother on the other side we started a program to help out young poor

started a program to help out young poor

started a program to help out young poor break off the poverty cycle so what we

break off the poverty cycle so what we

break off the poverty cycle so what we do we do we try to make sure that they

do we do we try to make sure that they

do we do we try to make sure that they learn effective parenting skills they

learn effective parenting skills they

learn effective parenting skills they try to get good jobs and we try to make

try to get good jobs and we try to make

try to get good jobs and we try to make sure that the kids go to good

sure that the kids go to good

sure that the kids go to good kindergarten and sure that they go to

kindergarten and sure that they go to

kindergarten and sure that they go to after-school care make sure they have

after-school care make sure they have

after-school care make sure they have tuition it sounds like a great idea

tuition it sounds like a great idea

tuition it sounds like a great idea right except it really wasn’t why do I

right except it really wasn’t why do I

right except it really wasn’t why do I say that because when we try to reach

say that because when we try to reach

say that because when we try to reach out to families like madam isms family

out to families like madam isms family

out to families like madam isms family many of them didn’t want to come down we

many of them didn’t want to come down we

many of them didn’t want to come down we caught them we visit them we back them

caught them we visit them we back them

caught them we visit them we back them they just didn’t come down then we went

they just didn’t come down then we went

they just didn’t come down then we went to madame ism and listened to her and

to madame ism and listened to her and

to madame ism and listened to her and she shared about her particular

she shared about her particular

she shared about her particular viewpoint

viewpoint

viewpoint she is the sole caregiver of so many

she is the sole caregiver of so many

she is the sole caregiver of so many people in her family and the reason why

people in her family and the reason why

people in her family and the reason why she’s not ballast because the kids do

she’s not ballast because the kids do

she’s not ballast because the kids do not want to come down therefore what we

not want to come down therefore what we

not want to come down therefore what we did was in response design a Kids

did was in response design a Kids

did was in response design a Kids program so that the parents are coming

program so that the parents are coming

program so that the parents are coming down and then there’s somebody taking

down and then there’s somebody taking

down and then there’s somebody taking care of the kids but then the kids were

care of the kids but then the kids were

care of the kids but then the kids were not happy because they were really

not happy because they were really

not happy because they were really bought so what we did is we experimented

bought so what we did is we experimented

bought so what we did is we experimented a lot to make sure that the kids are

a lot to make sure that the kids are

a lot to make sure that the kids are something interesting you do any

something interesting you do any

something interesting you do any eventually we found something that they

eventually we found something that they

eventually we found something that they like which is doing arts and then

like which is doing arts and then

like which is doing arts and then something beautiful happened first the

something beautiful happened first the

something beautiful happened first the kids enjoyed themselves then

kids enjoyed themselves then

kids enjoyed themselves then kids bring and drag their parents down

kids bring and drag their parents down

kids bring and drag their parents down then the parents became good friends

then the parents became good friends

then the parents became good friends very soon we found that we had a very

very soon we found that we had a very

very soon we found that we had a very strong support network of single mothers

strong support network of single mothers

strong support network of single mothers who supported each other they even

who supported each other they even

who supported each other they even exercised every week together and

exercised every week together and

exercised every week together and together they want to be more than just

together they want to be more than just

together they want to be more than just beneficiaries but also be change makers

beneficiaries but also be change makers

beneficiaries but also be change makers this is a picture of Marilyn ISM after

this is a picture of Marilyn ISM after

this is a picture of Marilyn ISM after the program instead of being a batch the

the program instead of being a batch the

the program instead of being a batch the beneficiary she said that she wants to

beneficiary she said that she wants to

beneficiary she said that she wants to help and this is her trying to manastar

help and this is her trying to manastar

help and this is her trying to manastar cell passing free clothes to her

cell passing free clothes to her

cell passing free clothes to her neighbors who are needy and this would

neighbors who are needy and this would

neighbors who are needy and this would not be happening if we didn’t listen to

not be happening if we didn’t listen to

not be happening if we didn’t listen to the beneficiaries the third point I’m

the beneficiaries the third point I’m

the beneficiaries the third point I’m trying to make is that we must listen to

trying to make is that we must listen to

trying to make is that we must listen to the change maker within and so saying

the change maker within and so saying

the change maker within and so saying earlier this is essential to unleash the

earlier this is essential to unleash the

earlier this is essential to unleash the power of the community so within

power of the community so within

power of the community so within kabamaru Institute a new system where

kabamaru Institute a new system where

kabamaru Institute a new system where every new person volunteer coming in we

every new person volunteer coming in we

every new person volunteer coming in we have in-depth conversation with them to

have in-depth conversation with them to

have in-depth conversation with them to understand what changed to you today we

understand what changed to you today we

understand what changed to you today we want to see in the world and how can we

want to see in the world and how can we

want to see in the world and how can we work with them to achieve that change

work with them to achieve that change

work with them to achieve that change not just that we used to talk to her is

not just that we used to talk to her is

not just that we used to talk to her is this thing changemakers and tap on their

this thing changemakers and tap on their

this thing changemakers and tap on their ideas to follow on the story about the

ideas to follow on the story about the

ideas to follow on the story about the program I did mention that we have a

program I did mention that we have a

program I did mention that we have a fringe program for kids right after the

fringe program for kids right after the

fringe program for kids right after the program ended the changemakers came in

program ended the changemakers came in

program ended the changemakers came in through a post-mortem and to us that

through a post-mortem and to us that

through a post-mortem and to us that they want to do more how the origin idea

they want to do more how the origin idea

they want to do more how the origin idea was that making sure that the kids from

was that making sure that the kids from

was that making sure that the kids from needy families have enough can keep up

needy families have enough can keep up

needy families have enough can keep up through tuition true true

through tuition true true

through tuition true true let’s say after-school care true

let’s say after-school care true

let’s say after-school care true kindergarten actually that was not good

kindergarten actually that was not good

kindergarten actually that was not good enough because if you start life too far

enough because if you start life too far

enough because if you start life too far away from the starting point from the

away from the starting point from the

away from the starting point from the rest just trying to keep up is not good

rest just trying to keep up is not good

rest just trying to keep up is not good enough

enough

enough what my changemakers to me was this if

what my changemakers to me was this if

what my changemakers to me was this if you want them to truly fight the way

you want them to truly fight the way

you want them to truly fight the way pass the poverty cycle pass the glass

pass the poverty cycle pass the glass

pass the poverty cycle pass the glass ceiling

ceiling

ceiling we must inspire them to passion and

we must inspire them to passion and

we must inspire them to passion and therefore it is important to have a

therefore it is important to have a

therefore it is important to have a talent discovery and telling a passion

talent discovery and telling a passion

talent discovery and telling a passion program so that they can we can assemble

program so that they can we can assemble

program so that they can we can assemble a group of people talented in different

a group of people talented in different

a group of people talented in different views organize the kids find the talent

views organize the kids find the talent

views organize the kids find the talent in the kids so that death Helen and that

in the kids so that death Helen and that

in the kids so that death Helen and that passion will propel them to fight

passion will propel them to fight

passion will propel them to fight through incredible arts in life and so

through incredible arts in life and so

through incredible arts in life and so today we are working on a program to do

today we are working on a program to do

today we are working on a program to do exactly just that cumulating in a kid’s

exactly just that cumulating in a kid’s

exactly just that cumulating in a kid’s camp and the kids performance with the

camp and the kids performance with the

camp and the kids performance with the objective of not just letting the

objective of not just letting the

objective of not just letting the students the kids exhibit the talent but

students the kids exhibit the talent but

students the kids exhibit the talent but more importantly to allow the parents to

more importantly to allow the parents to

more importantly to allow the parents to see the passion and to be encouraged by

see the passion and to be encouraged by

see the passion and to be encouraged by that this is a mock-up website of a new

that this is a mock-up website of a new

that this is a mock-up website of a new effort that we’re doing it is called hop

effort that we’re doing it is called hop

effort that we’re doing it is called hop collective by lunch we have by now 15

collective by lunch we have by now 15

collective by lunch we have by now 15 grown-up initiatives focusing on social

grown-up initiatives focusing on social

grown-up initiatives focusing on social work in Cuban borough we feel that not

work in Cuban borough we feel that not

work in Cuban borough we feel that not just by listening we have to empower our

just by listening we have to empower our

just by listening we have to empower our changemakers so we created this platform

changemakers so we created this platform

changemakers so we created this platform for residents to come in to think about

for residents to come in to think about

for residents to come in to think about all the causes that can volunteer also

all the causes that can volunteer also

all the causes that can volunteer also for fellow changemakers to come in to

for fellow changemakers to come in to

for fellow changemakers to come in to understand what resources are available

understand what resources are available

understand what resources are available to change make and we are also making

to change make and we are also making

to change make and we are also making sure that even for people who don’t see

sure that even for people who don’t see

sure that even for people who don’t see a cost that currently associate that

a cost that currently associate that

a cost that currently associate that with they have the toolkits to come in

with they have the toolkits to come in

with they have the toolkits to come in and empower them after the toolkits to

and empower them after the toolkits to

and empower them after the toolkits to change the community so some of this

change the community so some of this

change the community so some of this ideas that come out ah

ideas that come out ah

ideas that come out ah for example they want to form a group

for example they want to form a group

for example they want to form a group called tech for good to use technology

called tech for good to use technology

called tech for good to use technology to help community Saudi programs they

to help community Saudi programs they

to help community Saudi programs they are coming up is also an incubation

are coming up is also an incubation

are coming up is also an incubation service

service

service for other change making efforts from the

for other change making efforts from the

for other change making efforts from the ground up and we are just getting

ground up and we are just getting

ground up and we are just getting started so I’d like to conclude this

started so I’d like to conclude this

started so I’d like to conclude this story about listening by a sharing of it

story about listening by a sharing of it

story about listening by a sharing of it an interesting and adult that I but from

an interesting and adult that I but from

an interesting and adult that I but from another TED talk there’s a TED talk by

another TED talk there’s a TED talk by

another TED talk there’s a TED talk by Italian change maker he was into

Italian change maker he was into

Italian change maker he was into development they ate in Africa and he

development they ate in Africa and he

development they ate in Africa and he was part of this group where they would

was part of this group where they would

was part of this group where they would transfer the best know-how from Italy to

transfer the best know-how from Italy to

transfer the best know-how from Italy to Zambia

Zambia

Zambia so the Italians were extremely

so the Italians were extremely

so the Italians were extremely passionate about a practical cost

passionate about a practical cost

passionate about a practical cost growing excellent beautiful big Tomatoes

growing excellent beautiful big Tomatoes

growing excellent beautiful big Tomatoes so do they brought this a wonderful idea

so do they brought this a wonderful idea

so do they brought this a wonderful idea over to the Zambians and for some

over to the Zambians and for some

over to the Zambians and for some reasons the Zambians didn’t bite on this

reasons the Zambians didn’t bite on this

reasons the Zambians didn’t bite on this idea but never mind the changemakers

idea but never mind the changemakers

idea but never mind the changemakers persisted and in the end they succeeded

persisted and in the end they succeeded

persisted and in the end they succeeded in growing big fat beautiful tomatoes

in growing big fat beautiful tomatoes

in growing big fat beautiful tomatoes until the hippos came in at all of them

until the hippos came in at all of them

until the hippos came in at all of them of course the italians were really upset

of course the italians were really upset

of course the italians were really upset with the hippos and they asked his

with the hippos and they asked his

with the hippos and they asked his ambience why didn’t you tell us that in

ambience why didn’t you tell us that in

ambience why didn’t you tell us that in zambia he posts eat tomatoes then the

zambia he posts eat tomatoes then the

zambia he posts eat tomatoes then the Zambians responded but you didn’t ask

Zambians responded but you didn’t ask

Zambians responded but you didn’t ask you didn’t ask

you didn’t ask

you didn’t ask it’s the same as saying you’re not

it’s the same as saying you’re not

it’s the same as saying you’re not listening so all around the world change

listening so all around the world change

listening so all around the world change makers are beginning to understand and

makers are beginning to understand and

makers are beginning to understand and tap on the power of listening so I hope

tap on the power of listening so I hope

tap on the power of listening so I hope that when we go back after the talk

that when we go back after the talk

that when we go back after the talk today whether or not we are trying to

today whether or not we are trying to

today whether or not we are trying to affect change in the community on the

affect change in the community on the

affect change in the community on the business or in in the personal space

business or in in the personal space

business or in in the personal space when we want to do so let’s not charge

when we want to do so let’s not charge

when we want to do so let’s not charge in with a preconceived notion but focus

in with a preconceived notion but focus

in with a preconceived notion but focus on listening because it matters and your

on listening because it matters and your

on listening because it matters and your shape the way in which we want to change

shape the way in which we want to change

shape the way in which we want to change the world and thank you so much for

the world and thank you so much for

the world and thank you so much for listening

listening

listening [Applause]

”

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