[Music] [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
all of us here today we have two lives
all of us here today we have two lives there’s the life on paper the one
there’s the life on paper the one
there’s the life on paper the one capturing our accomplishments think of
capturing our accomplishments think of
capturing our accomplishments think of your resume or your CV then there’s the
your resume or your CV then there’s the
your resume or your CV then there’s the life that we actually live often these
life that we actually live often these
life that we actually live often these two lives don’t reflect the same reality
two lives don’t reflect the same reality
two lives don’t reflect the same reality I’m no exception to this I’ve had a
I’m no exception to this I’ve had a
I’m no exception to this I’ve had a pretty successful career so far
pretty successful career so far
pretty successful career so far currently I’m pursuing a PhD in computer
currently I’m pursuing a PhD in computer
currently I’m pursuing a PhD in computer science here at Stanford University I
science here at Stanford University I
science here at Stanford University I have a National Science Foundation
have a National Science Foundation
have a National Science Foundation graduate research fellowship I did my
graduate research fellowship I did my
graduate research fellowship I did my bachelor’s and master’s degrees at MIT
bachelor’s and master’s degrees at MIT
bachelor’s and master’s degrees at MIT and I interned at Google twice once in
and I interned at Google twice once in
and I interned at Google twice once in California and once in Switzerland
California and once in Switzerland
California and once in Switzerland looking at my life on paper people often
looking at my life on paper people often
looking at my life on paper people often imagined it followed a linear path a
imagined it followed a linear path a
imagined it followed a linear path a nice straight line like this they
nice straight line like this they
nice straight line like this they probably assumed that I started well off
probably assumed that I started well off
probably assumed that I started well off and came from a loving and supportive
and came from a loving and supportive
and came from a loving and supportive family that I was enrolled in the best
family that I was enrolled in the best
family that I was enrolled in the best schools and pushed to take the toughest
schools and pushed to take the toughest
schools and pushed to take the toughest classes and as a millennial that I felt
classes and as a millennial that I felt
classes and as a millennial that I felt special
but if you dig a little deeper my life
but if you dig a little deeper my life looked a little bit more like this I was
looked a little bit more like this I was
looked a little bit more like this I was born while my mom was in prison my
born while my mom was in prison my
born while my mom was in prison my father left before I was born
father left before I was born
father left before I was born I still don’t even know his name I was
I still don’t even know his name I was
I still don’t even know his name I was put into foster care and then later
put into foster care and then later
put into foster care and then later adopted by my maternal grandparents
adopted by my maternal grandparents
adopted by my maternal grandparents although they had big hearts for
although they had big hearts for
although they had big hearts for volunteering to adopt me and my siblings
volunteering to adopt me and my siblings
volunteering to adopt me and my siblings they didn’t have much left to give us so
they didn’t have much left to give us so
they didn’t have much left to give us so I grew up poor our primary source of
I grew up poor our primary source of
I grew up poor our primary source of income was my grandparents Social
income was my grandparents Social
income was my grandparents Social Security
Security
Security I spent K through 12 and public school
I spent K through 12 and public school
I spent K through 12 and public school and I was never in anything like a
and I was never in anything like a
and I was never in anything like a gifted and talented program in fact I
gifted and talented program in fact I
gifted and talented program in fact I started out in remedial English classes
started out in remedial English classes
started out in remedial English classes in elementary school and I was average
in elementary school and I was average
in elementary school and I was average at math so there’s a gap between these
at math so there’s a gap between these
at math so there’s a gap between these two lines
two lines
two lines and unfortunately for people who start
and unfortunately for people who start
and unfortunately for people who start on these two trajectories to intersect
on these two trajectories to intersect
on these two trajectories to intersect is incredibly rare that bothers me and
is incredibly rare that bothers me and
is incredibly rare that bothers me and it’s part of the reason I’m pursuing my
it’s part of the reason I’m pursuing my
it’s part of the reason I’m pursuing my PhD regardless of the y-intercept the
PhD regardless of the y-intercept the
PhD regardless of the y-intercept the limit should be the same as time goes to
limit should be the same as time goes to
limit should be the same as time goes to infinity today I want to demystify my
infinity today I want to demystify my
infinity today I want to demystify my trajectory and show you how we can close
trajectory and show you how we can close
trajectory and show you how we can close this gap I want to take you back to a
this gap I want to take you back to a
this gap I want to take you back to a typical day my early childhood to give
typical day my early childhood to give
typical day my early childhood to give you a sense of what it was like in a
you a sense of what it was like in a
you a sense of what it was like in a moment after spending a year in prison
moment after spending a year in prison
moment after spending a year in prison the charges against my mother were
the charges against my mother were
the charges against my mother were dropped but during that year she was
dropped but during that year she was
dropped but during that year she was declared insane by the FBI when she was
declared insane by the FBI when she was
declared insane by the FBI when she was released my grandparents took her in
released my grandparents took her in
released my grandparents took her in well it wasn’t easy having her around
well it wasn’t easy having her around
well it wasn’t easy having her around the house she constantly got in fights
the house she constantly got in fights
the house she constantly got in fights with my grandparents wrote crazy emails
with my grandparents wrote crazy emails
with my grandparents wrote crazy emails in all caps
in all caps
in all caps I left Knightley voicemails for the FBI
I left Knightley voicemails for the FBI
I left Knightley voicemails for the FBI it seemed like the police were
it seemed like the police were
it seemed like the police were constantly at our house over the 24
constantly at our house over the 24
constantly at our house over the 24 years that we lived
years that we lived
years that we lived we racked up about 65 police reports
amidst this chaos I was the lowest
amidst this chaos I was the lowest concern which had some perks I didn’t
concern which had some perks I didn’t
concern which had some perks I didn’t have a bedtime I could watch TV and play
have a bedtime I could watch TV and play
have a bedtime I could watch TV and play video games for as long as I wanted but
video games for as long as I wanted but
video games for as long as I wanted but of course there are also some downsides
of course there are also some downsides
of course there are also some downsides rather than buy food for me my mom spent
rather than buy food for me my mom spent
rather than buy food for me my mom spent whatever money she made buying more
whatever money she made buying more
whatever money she made buying more clothes and food for the 16 cats and
clothes and food for the 16 cats and
clothes and food for the 16 cats and dogs she owned to make things worse I
dogs she owned to make things worse I
dogs she owned to make things worse I was allergic to those cats and dogs so I
was allergic to those cats and dogs so I
was allergic to those cats and dogs so I spent most of my time at home sick
spent most of my time at home sick
spent most of my time at home sick school was literally a breath of fresh
school was literally a breath of fresh
school was literally a breath of fresh air it was only after the bus ride that
air it was only after the bus ride that
air it was only after the bus ride that I could finally breathe and that my
I could finally breathe and that my
I could finally breathe and that my runny nose and sneezing went away throw
runny nose and sneezing went away throw
runny nose and sneezing went away throw in a free lunch and school was pretty
in a free lunch and school was pretty
in a free lunch and school was pretty much a dream come true
looking back on it I can’t help but
looking back on it I can’t help but smile because I know how it turned out
smile because I know how it turned out
smile because I know how it turned out but in the moment it was horrible
getting anything I needed was a
getting anything I needed was a challenge I knew I wanted to get out but
challenge I knew I wanted to get out but
challenge I knew I wanted to get out but I didn’t know how to nor did I have the
I didn’t know how to nor did I have the
I didn’t know how to nor did I have the confidence to life seemed hopeless
so what happened well I owe a big I owe
so what happened well I owe a big I owe a big thanks to my older brother Sean
a big thanks to my older brother Sean
a big thanks to my older brother Sean he’s 18 years older than me when I was
he’s 18 years older than me when I was
he’s 18 years older than me when I was born he was on his way out of the house
born he was on his way out of the house
born he was on his way out of the house and wanted nothing to do with our family
and wanted nothing to do with our family
and wanted nothing to do with our family I can’t blame him it wasn’t until I was
I can’t blame him it wasn’t until I was
I can’t blame him it wasn’t until I was in my early teens that he decided to
in my early teens that he decided to
in my early teens that he decided to come back and help out me and the rest
come back and help out me and the rest
come back and help out me and the rest of the family this was my first big
of the family this was my first big
of the family this was my first big inflection point Sean had started to
inflection point Sean had started to
inflection point Sean had started to settle down in Virginia he was living a
settle down in Virginia he was living a
settle down in Virginia he was living a good life and had a partner just seeing
good life and had a partner just seeing
good life and had a partner just seeing him succeed inspired me he went through
him succeed inspired me he went through
him succeed inspired me he went through everything I did and more but he
everything I did and more but he
everything I did and more but he survived and he got out I thought maybe
survived and he got out I thought maybe
survived and he got out I thought maybe I could do the same Sean was also the
I could do the same Sean was also the
I could do the same Sean was also the first person to believe in me to really
first person to believe in me to really
first person to believe in me to really believe in me after my freshman year in
believe in me after my freshman year in
believe in me after my freshman year in high school he asked me where I wanted
high school he asked me where I wanted
high school he asked me where I wanted to go to college and I said something
to go to college and I said something
to go to college and I said something like I I don’t know I’d like to go to a
like I I don’t know I’d like to go to a
like I I don’t know I’d like to go to a good school and being from New Jersey
good school and being from New Jersey
good school and being from New Jersey I said maybe a school like Princeton but
I said maybe a school like Princeton but
I said maybe a school like Princeton but but they’ll never accept someone like me
but they’ll never accept someone like me
but they’ll never accept someone like me and even if I got in I couldn’t afford
and even if I got in I couldn’t afford
and even if I got in I couldn’t afford it Sean challenged me he said what are
it Sean challenged me he said what are
it Sean challenged me he said what are you talking about you’re doing well in
you talking about you’re doing well in
you talking about you’re doing well in school if you continue to work hard
school if you continue to work hard
school if you continue to work hard you’ll have a chance of getting in and
you’ll have a chance of getting in and
you’ll have a chance of getting in and if you get into a school like that
if you get into a school like that
if you get into a school like that they’ll make sure that money isn’t an
they’ll make sure that money isn’t an
they’ll make sure that money isn’t an issue with that little boost in
issue with that little boost in
issue with that little boost in confidence a switch flipped in my head
confidence a switch flipped in my head
confidence a switch flipped in my head and I went from thinking why bother to
and I went from thinking why bother to
and I went from thinking why bother to why not of course I was still far from
why not of course I was still far from
why not of course I was still far from getting into MIT and when Sean wasn’t
getting into MIT and when Sean wasn’t
getting into MIT and when Sean wasn’t around I felt alone and over overwhelmed
around I felt alone and over overwhelmed
around I felt alone and over overwhelmed by the chaos around me fortunately my
by the chaos around me fortunately my
by the chaos around me fortunately my hard work start to pay off and my
hard work start to pay off and my
hard work start to pay off and my teachers began to notice
teachers began to notice
teachers began to notice this was my second big inflection point
this was my second big inflection point
this was my second big inflection point my junior year in high school I had an
my junior year in high school I had an
my junior year in high school I had an amazing trigonometry teacher mrs.
amazing trigonometry teacher mrs.
amazing trigonometry teacher mrs. Chantal Smith she noticed that my braces
Chantal Smith she noticed that my braces
Chantal Smith she noticed that my braces were falling apart and asked what was
were falling apart and asked what was
were falling apart and asked what was going on when I told her that my family
going on when I told her that my family
going on when I told her that my family kept missing appointments and
kept missing appointments and
kept missing appointments and accumulating cancellation fees she
accumulating cancellation fees she
accumulating cancellation fees she figured everything out and took me to
figured everything out and took me to
figured everything out and took me to her children’s orthodontists her
her children’s orthodontists her
her children’s orthodontists her kindness didn’t stop there she paid for
kindness didn’t stop there she paid for
kindness didn’t stop there she paid for me to go to driving school so I could
me to go to driving school so I could
me to go to driving school so I could get out of my grandmother’s house and
get out of my grandmother’s house and
get out of my grandmother’s house and away from all of my mother’s pets I was
away from all of my mother’s pets I was
away from all of my mother’s pets I was finally able to get a job at the local
finally able to get a job at the local
finally able to get a job at the local library and buy food and allergy
library and buy food and allergy
library and buy food and allergy medicine when I went to college she sent
medicine when I went to college she sent
medicine when I went to college she sent me care packages and when I came home
me care packages and when I came home
me care packages and when I came home for the holidays she let me stay with
for the holidays she let me stay with
for the holidays she let me stay with her family I don’t think of her as my
her family I don’t think of her as my
her family I don’t think of her as my trigonometry teacher anymore but rather
trigonometry teacher anymore but rather
trigonometry teacher anymore but rather my mom and Chantal is only one of the
my mom and Chantal is only one of the
my mom and Chantal is only one of the amazing teachers that helped change my
amazing teachers that helped change my
amazing teachers that helped change my life norm in Graham he taught TV
life norm in Graham he taught TV
life norm in Graham he taught TV production I never actually took his
production I never actually took his
production I never actually took his class it was my senior year and we used
class it was my senior year and we used
class it was my senior year and we used his classroom for AP statistics
his classroom for AP statistics
his classroom for AP statistics it was his prep period so while he was
it was his prep period so while he was
it was his prep period so while he was getting ready for the rest of the day he
getting ready for the rest of the day he
getting ready for the rest of the day he would observe our class at the end of
would observe our class at the end of
would observe our class at the end of the year he came up to me and told me
the year he came up to me and told me
the year he came up to me and told me that he was so impressed by my work
that he was so impressed by my work
that he was so impressed by my work ethic and personality that he wanted to
ethic and personality that he wanted to
ethic and personality that he wanted to make me a promise he said I’ll make sure
make me a promise he said I’ll make sure
make me a promise he said I’ll make sure you never go hungry while you’re at MIT
you never go hungry while you’re at MIT
you never go hungry while you’re at MIT normally an above and beyond for a kid
normally an above and beyond for a kid
normally an above and beyond for a kid that wasn’t even his student he paid for
that wasn’t even his student he paid for
that wasn’t even his student he paid for my cell phone and bought me a computer
my cell phone and bought me a computer
my cell phone and bought me a computer when I had the opportunity to go to
when I had the opportunity to go to
when I had the opportunity to go to China but couldn’t afford the plane
China but couldn’t afford the plane
China but couldn’t afford the plane ticket him and his brothers raised the
ticket him and his brothers raised the
ticket him and his brothers raised the money so I could go now I didn’t go to
money so I could go now I didn’t go to
money so I could go now I didn’t go to some elite high school
some elite high school
some elite high school I went to Winslow Township High School a
I went to Winslow Township High School a
I went to Winslow Township High School a public high school in New Jersey we had
public high school in New Jersey we had
public high school in New Jersey we had gun threats
gun threats
gun threats lockdowns fistfights food fights
lockdowns fistfights food fights
lockdowns fistfights food fights academically
academically
academically it was rough too we’re about 200 points
it was rough too we’re about 200 points
it was rough too we’re about 200 points below the state average on the SAT and
below the state average on the SAT and
below the state average on the SAT and yet the teachers there cared and we’re
yet the teachers there cared and we’re
yet the teachers there cared and we’re willing to fight for their students
willing to fight for their students
willing to fight for their students thanks to their support I was the first
thanks to their support I was the first
thanks to their support I was the first student from my high school to go to MIT
student from my high school to go to MIT
student from my high school to go to MIT MIT despite the initial excitement when
MIT despite the initial excitement when
MIT despite the initial excitement when I first got to MIT I was terrified
before I left before I left high school
before I left before I left high school one of my closest friends told me that
one of my closest friends told me that
one of my closest friends told me that the only reason I got in was that I’m
the only reason I got in was that I’m
the only reason I got in was that I’m black everyone was going to be better
black everyone was going to be better
black everyone was going to be better prepared and well resourced also I
prepared and well resourced also I
prepared and well resourced also I didn’t know anyone in Boston and I was a
didn’t know anyone in Boston and I was a
didn’t know anyone in Boston and I was a shy kid so I was going to be alone how
shy kid so I was going to be alone how
shy kid so I was going to be alone how would I possibly keep up well what I
would I possibly keep up well what I
would I possibly keep up well what I realized was no one there knew that this
realized was no one there knew that this
realized was no one there knew that this is my third big inflection point no one
is my third big inflection point no one
is my third big inflection point no one knew the shy quiet Cody from Winslow
knew the shy quiet Cody from Winslow
knew the shy quiet Cody from Winslow Township High School I decided to
Township High School I decided to
Township High School I decided to reinvent myself to be more outgoing and
reinvent myself to be more outgoing and
reinvent myself to be more outgoing and resourceful at first I had no clue what
resourceful at first I had no clue what
resourceful at first I had no clue what I was doing so I would start
I was doing so I would start
I was doing so I would start conversations by introducing myself
conversations by introducing myself
conversations by introducing myself something like hi I’m Cody and then
something like hi I’m Cody and then
something like hi I’m Cody and then struggling through the rest of it over
struggling through the rest of it over
struggling through the rest of it over time the conversations became more
time the conversations became more
time the conversations became more natural and I made a good group of
natural and I made a good group of
natural and I made a good group of friends I even became the social chair
friends I even became the social chair
friends I even became the social chair of my fraternity academically I was
of my fraternity academically I was
of my fraternity academically I was afraid that I was going to fail but I
afraid that I was going to fail but I
afraid that I was going to fail but I used that fear to push me to go to
used that fear to push me to go to
used that fear to push me to go to office hours and ask questions when
office hours and ask questions when
office hours and ask questions when things start to fall apart with my
things start to fall apart with my
things start to fall apart with my family back home I went to counseling at
family back home I went to counseling at
family back home I went to counseling at MIT medical
MIT medical
MIT medical but by the time that I graduated with my
but by the time that I graduated with my
but by the time that I graduated with my bachelor’s degree I didn’t feel behind
bachelor’s degree I didn’t feel behind
bachelor’s degree I didn’t feel behind anymore I was the president of the ADA
anymore I was the president of the ADA
anymore I was the president of the ADA Kappa nu Honor Society and I had a 4
Kappa nu Honor Society and I had a 4
Kappa nu Honor Society and I had a 4 point 9 out of 5.0 GPA it’s tempting to
point 9 out of 5.0 GPA it’s tempting to
point 9 out of 5.0 GPA it’s tempting to think that I’m exceptional or gifted but
think that I’m exceptional or gifted but
think that I’m exceptional or gifted but I didn’t succeed because I’m special
I didn’t succeed because I’m special
I didn’t succeed because I’m special every accomplishment was a struggle and
every accomplishment was a struggle and
every accomplishment was a struggle and I made plenty of mistakes what enabled
I made plenty of mistakes what enabled
I made plenty of mistakes what enabled me to succeed was the incredible
me to succeed was the incredible
me to succeed was the incredible encouragement and support I received
encouragement and support I received
encouragement and support I received Sean Chantal norm and many more were
Sean Chantal norm and many more were
Sean Chantal norm and many more were invaluable in changing my trajectory and
invaluable in changing my trajectory and
invaluable in changing my trajectory and getting me to where I am today but I
getting me to where I am today but I
getting me to where I am today but I want to make one thing clear that wasn’t
want to make one thing clear that wasn’t
want to make one thing clear that wasn’t their original goal it started small
their original goal it started small
their original goal it started small with a willingness to observe connect
with a willingness to observe connect
with a willingness to observe connect and engage with the people around them
and engage with the people around them
and engage with the people around them you don’t need to make a big grand
you don’t need to make a big grand
you don’t need to make a big grand gesture to make a major inflection point
gesture to make a major inflection point
gesture to make a major inflection point in someone’s life it can be as simple as
in someone’s life it can be as simple as
in someone’s life it can be as simple as just taking a few extra moments to dig a
just taking a few extra moments to dig a
just taking a few extra moments to dig a little deeper go past that life on paper
little deeper go past that life on paper
little deeper go past that life on paper and understand the life that someone
and understand the life that someone
and understand the life that someone actually lives it’s only when you
actually lives it’s only when you
actually lives it’s only when you understand the difference that you can
understand the difference that you can
understand the difference that you can step in and make a profound impact by
step in and make a profound impact by
step in and make a profound impact by engaging with the people around us we
engaging with the people around us we
engaging with the people around us we have the power to close this gap you
have the power to close this gap you
have the power to close this gap you just have to ask yourself one question
just have to ask yourself one question
just have to ask yourself one question why not thank you
why not thank you
why not thank you you
”
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