if you’re a business communicator in the digital age you know more than anybody
digital age you know more than anybody
digital age you know more than anybody how important it is today to connect
how important it is today to connect
how important it is today to connect with and deliver real value to the
with and deliver real value to the
with and deliver real value to the people who matter to the success of your
people who matter to the success of your
people who matter to the success of your business
unfortunately this guy didn’t get the
unfortunately this guy didn’t get the memo you may have run into this guy
memo you may have run into this guy
memo you may have run into this guy during your business travels and you
during your business travels and you
during your business travels and you realize like that that he wasn’t there
realize like that that he wasn’t there
realize like that that he wasn’t there to connect with you the only thing he
to connect with you the only thing he
to connect with you the only thing he wanted to do is sell you something now
wanted to do is sell you something now
wanted to do is sell you something now if you haven’t met somebody like this
if you haven’t met somebody like this
if you haven’t met somebody like this guy I’m gonna paint you a little picture
guy I’m gonna paint you a little picture
guy I’m gonna paint you a little picture and this is a true story starring me so
and this is a true story starring me so
and this is a true story starring me so I’m at this networking event and I have
I’m at this networking event and I have
I’m at this networking event and I have to admit I’m not that comfortable
to admit I’m not that comfortable
to admit I’m not that comfortable networking I’m an introvert but I I can
networking I’m an introvert but I I can
networking I’m an introvert but I I can do it when I need to and I know how
do it when I need to and I know how
do it when I need to and I know how important it is but it needs to be a
important it is but it needs to be a
important it is but it needs to be a comfortable thing and this guy looked
comfortable thing and this guy looked
comfortable thing and this guy looked really friendly so I summoned up all my
really friendly so I summoned up all my
really friendly so I summoned up all my courage and I went over to him and I
courage and I went over to him and I
courage and I went over to him and I extended my hand his nametag said Sam hi
extended my hand his nametag said Sam hi
extended my hand his nametag said Sam hi Sam how do you do my name is Dana and my
Sam how do you do my name is Dana and my
Sam how do you do my name is Dana and my head handshake was firm and confident
head handshake was firm and confident
head handshake was firm and confident like it’s supposed to be but his
like it’s supposed to be but his
like it’s supposed to be but his handshake was like sticking your hand in
handshake was like sticking your hand in
handshake was like sticking your hand in a rough crusher and he broke every bone
a rough crusher and he broke every bone
a rough crusher and he broke every bone in my hand well he didn’t notice I was
in my hand well he didn’t notice I was
in my hand well he didn’t notice I was wincing because he wasn’t looking at me
wincing because he wasn’t looking at me
wincing because he wasn’t looking at me he was looking through me scanning the
he was looking through me scanning the
he was looking through me scanning the room for his next victim
room for his next victim
room for his next victim well this made me really uncomfortable
well this made me really uncomfortable
well this made me really uncomfortable and I just wanted to get out of there
and I just wanted to get out of there
and I just wanted to get out of there and I wanted to go to the emergency room
and I wanted to go to the emergency room
and I wanted to go to the emergency room actually but instead I stuck it out and
actually but instead I stuck it out and
actually but instead I stuck it out and I decided to talk to him some more cuz I
I decided to talk to him some more cuz I
I decided to talk to him some more cuz I was fascinated by this point so Sam what
was fascinated by this point so Sam what
was fascinated by this point so Sam what do you do and he are never havin giving
do you do and he are never havin giving
do you do and he are never havin giving me some kind of 30 minute spiel know
me some kind of 30 minute spiel know
me some kind of 30 minute spiel know what felt like 30 minutes was 30 seconds
what felt like 30 minutes was 30 seconds
what felt like 30 minutes was 30 seconds and he didn’t talk about a product or
and he didn’t talk about a product or
and he didn’t talk about a product or service he rather he talked about
service he rather he talked about
service he rather he talked about himself a lot and I smiled and I nodded
himself a lot and I smiled and I nodded
himself a lot and I smiled and I nodded and I
and I
and I to be very interested and I reflected
to be very interested and I reflected
to be very interested and I reflected back oh yeah how many yeah Wow and we
back oh yeah how many yeah Wow and we
back oh yeah how many yeah Wow and we extended we exchanged business cards and
extended we exchanged business cards and
extended we exchanged business cards and then I drew in some breadth so I could
then I drew in some breadth so I could
then I drew in some breadth so I could tell him about me and what I do and
tell him about me and what I do and
tell him about me and what I do and before I could get the first word out he
before I could get the first word out he
before I could get the first word out he turned and walked away he walked away
turned and walked away he walked away
turned and walked away he walked away from me I was flabbergasted don’t you
from me I was flabbergasted don’t you
from me I was flabbergasted don’t you know like a few days later I got an
know like a few days later I got an
know like a few days later I got an email from this guy addressed a dear
email from this guy addressed a dear
email from this guy addressed a dear friend trying to sell me something I hit
friend trying to sell me something I hit
friend trying to sell me something I hit the delete button so hard my neighbor’s
the delete button so hard my neighbor’s
the delete button so hard my neighbor’s computer broke now if people like Sam
computer broke now if people like Sam
computer broke now if people like Sam treat people face-to-face the way he
treat people face-to-face the way he
treat people face-to-face the way he treated me during that awkward
treated me during that awkward
treated me during that awkward face-to-face encounter imagine how he
face-to-face encounter imagine how he
face-to-face encounter imagine how he behaves online where people like this
behaves online where people like this
behaves online where people like this have access to more than 200 free social
have access to more than 200 free social
have access to more than 200 free social media channels and they pushed
media channels and they pushed
media channels and they pushed themselves out every day to potentially
themselves out every day to potentially
themselves out every day to potentially 10,000 people or more and when he’s
10,000 people or more and when he’s
10,000 people or more and when he’s really hyped up he blasts email into
really hyped up he blasts email into
really hyped up he blasts email into your inbox which forces you to hit
your inbox which forces you to hit
your inbox which forces you to hit delete delete delete which could lead to
delete delete delete which could lead to
delete delete delete which could lead to carpal tunnel syndrome and not a little
carpal tunnel syndrome and not a little
carpal tunnel syndrome and not a little bit of loss of faith in the future of
bit of loss of faith in the future of
bit of loss of faith in the future of humanity see Sam is a taker he doesn’t
humanity see Sam is a taker he doesn’t
humanity see Sam is a taker he doesn’t he doesn’t give back he talks bad he
he doesn’t give back he talks bad he
he doesn’t give back he talks bad he doesn’t listen
doesn’t listen
doesn’t listen the only thing Sam is interested is
the only thing Sam is interested is
the only thing Sam is interested is invent advancing his own agenda and when
invent advancing his own agenda and when
invent advancing his own agenda and when your wits him you wonder if he even sees
your wits him you wonder if he even sees
your wits him you wonder if he even sees you as a human being or just a means to
you as a human being or just a means to
you as a human being or just a means to an end maybe I’ve honored this kind of
an end maybe I’ve honored this kind of
an end maybe I’ve honored this kind of behavior over the years he’s not the
behavior over the years he’s not the
behavior over the years he’s not the only guy there are other people like him
only guy there are other people like him
only guy there are other people like him and I wonder to people like that stay in
and I wonder to people like that stay in
and I wonder to people like that stay in business did he even have any customers
business did he even have any customers
business did he even have any customers who aren’t friends or relatives and I
who aren’t friends or relatives and I
who aren’t friends or relatives and I wonder gosh you know I see it all the
wonder gosh you know I see it all the
wonder gosh you know I see it all the time there are so many people who go in
time there are so many people who go in
time there are so many people who go in business and all they talk about is
business and all they talk about is
business and all they talk about is themselves and then I realize I’m gonna
themselves and then I realize I’m gonna
themselves and then I realize I’m gonna give them some slack that this is what
give them some slack that this is what
give them some slack that this is what people are taught they’re taught that
people are taught they’re taught that
people are taught they’re taught that aggressive self-promotion is the way
aggressive self-promotion is the way
aggressive self-promotion is the way you’re supposed to grow a business but
you’re supposed to grow a business but
you’re supposed to grow a business but you see that’s old school thinking times
you see that’s old school thinking times
you see that’s old school thinking times have changed and of course with every
have changed and of course with every
have changed and of course with every chain if there’s a little bit of chaos
chain if there’s a little bit of chaos
chain if there’s a little bit of chaos some confusion and a whole new set of
some confusion and a whole new set of
some confusion and a whole new set of challenges for example there is more
challenges for example there is more
challenges for example there is more noise circling the globe than there’s
noise circling the globe than there’s
noise circling the globe than there’s ever been in history and yet we as
ever been in history and yet we as
ever been in history and yet we as business people still have to find a way
business people still have to find a way
business people still have to find a way to like cut through that clutter and
to like cut through that clutter and
to like cut through that clutter and convey to people that we’re the best
convey to people that we’re the best
convey to people that we’re the best people to do business with but we have
people to do business with but we have
people to do business with but we have to tread lightly because now we don’t
to tread lightly because now we don’t
to tread lightly because now we don’t want to seem inauthentic and another
want to seem inauthentic and another
want to seem inauthentic and another challenge is it takes time real time to
challenge is it takes time real time to
challenge is it takes time real time to get people to know like and trust you
get people to know like and trust you
get people to know like and trust you but the waiting makes us anxious and so
but the waiting makes us anxious and so
but the waiting makes us anxious and so we think we have bills to pay right so
we think we have bills to pay right so
we think we have bills to pay right so we slip into default mode which is
we slip into default mode which is
we slip into default mode which is shouting our promotional stuff from the
shouting our promotional stuff from the
shouting our promotional stuff from the rooftops again 24/7 365
rooftops again 24/7 365
rooftops again 24/7 365 Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee it’s as if we’re
Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee it’s as if we’re
Mee Mee Mee Mee Mee it’s as if we’re thinking hey if I can just shout loudly
thinking hey if I can just shout loudly
thinking hey if I can just shout loudly and often enough customers are going to
and often enough customers are going to
and often enough customers are going to just jump right into my lap but the
just jump right into my lap but the
just jump right into my lap but the harsh reality is today’s consumer is
harsh reality is today’s consumer is
harsh reality is today’s consumer is immune to that and the sound of their
immune to that and the sound of their
immune to that and the sound of their silence is deafening if you really want
silence is deafening if you really want
silence is deafening if you really want to attract attention to yourself in this
to attract attention to yourself in this
to attract attention to yourself in this digital age you’ve got to think and
digital age you’ve got to think and
digital age you’ve got to think and communicate in a whole new way and it
communicate in a whole new way and it
communicate in a whole new way and it might seem counterintuitive but believe
might seem counterintuitive but believe
might seem counterintuitive but believe me it is so much more effective for
me it is so much more effective for
me it is so much more effective for achieving your business goals um I hate
achieving your business goals um I hate
achieving your business goals um I hate to be the one to say this don’t shoot
to be the one to say this don’t shoot
to be the one to say this don’t shoot the messenger I don’t want to sound like
the messenger I don’t want to sound like
the messenger I don’t want to sound like the schoolyard bully but you need to
the schoolyard bully but you need to
the schoolyard bully but you need to know nobody cares about you
know nobody cares about you
know nobody cares about you more but you know who they do care about
more but you know who they do care about
more but you know who they do care about themselves right it’s human it’s natural
themselves right it’s human it’s natural
themselves right it’s human it’s natural we’re built that way we can help it
we’re built that way we can help it
we’re built that way we can help it and we all think that we’re the center
and we all think that we’re the center
and we all think that we’re the center of our own universe everyone wants to be
of our own universe everyone wants to be
of our own universe everyone wants to be noticed everyone wants to be cared about
noticed everyone wants to be cared about
noticed everyone wants to be cared about right so now we’re thinking well how do
right so now we’re thinking well how do
right so now we’re thinking well how do I promote myself and have people care
I promote myself and have people care
I promote myself and have people care about me
about me
about me and show them that I care about them in
and show them that I care about them in
and show them that I care about them in return well here’s a little hint
return well here’s a little hint
return well here’s a little hint something to think about the more we
something to think about the more we
something to think about the more we rely on technology to communicate the
rely on technology to communicate the
rely on technology to communicate the more people crave real heartfelt human
more people crave real heartfelt human
more people crave real heartfelt human connection we seek out people to do
connection we seek out people to do
connection we seek out people to do business with not some faceless
business with not some faceless
business with not some faceless corporation and we decide if a business
corporation and we decide if a business
corporation and we decide if a business is trustworthy by how sharing its
is trustworthy by how sharing its
is trustworthy by how sharing its experts are and how much we feel they
experts are and how much we feel they
experts are and how much we feel they care about us and the community and the
care about us and the community and the
care about us and the community and the world and that’s where the e word comes
world and that’s where the e word comes
world and that’s where the e word comes in empathy demonstrating empathy is one
in empathy demonstrating empathy is one
in empathy demonstrating empathy is one of the most important ways to show
of the most important ways to show
of the most important ways to show people that you care it’s about sharing
people that you care it’s about sharing
people that you care it’s about sharing exchanging ideas it’s about listening to
exchanging ideas it’s about listening to
exchanging ideas it’s about listening to them it’s about understanding their
them it’s about understanding their
them it’s about understanding their their pain it’s about solving their
their pain it’s about solving their
their pain it’s about solving their problems it’s about treating others
problems it’s about treating others
problems it’s about treating others better than then you treat yourself
better than then you treat yourself
better than then you treat yourself don’t focus solely on yourself you don’t
don’t focus solely on yourself you don’t
don’t focus solely on yourself you don’t have to do that just stop drinking your
have to do that just stop drinking your
have to do that just stop drinking your own kool-aid spit it out publicly
own kool-aid spit it out publicly
own kool-aid spit it out publicly recognize the achievements of others
recognize the achievements of others
recognize the achievements of others make them laugh target their
make them laugh target their
make them laugh target their heartstrings model for them how to lead
heartstrings model for them how to lead
heartstrings model for them how to lead safe happy healthy lives and every time
safe happy healthy lives and every time
safe happy healthy lives and every time you can tell a great story
empathy and value are the oxygen of
empathy and value are the oxygen of Commerce in the digital age and I have a
Commerce in the digital age and I have a
Commerce in the digital age and I have a vision that if we can all change our
vision that if we can all change our
vision that if we can all change our mindset away from me me me to you you
mindset away from me me me to you you
mindset away from me me me to you you you fewer businesses will fail and
you fewer businesses will fail and
you fewer businesses will fail and greater goodness will expand into the
greater goodness will expand into the
greater goodness will expand into the universe and as Martin Luther King jr.
universe and as Martin Luther King jr.
universe and as Martin Luther King jr. said every man must decide whether to
said every man must decide whether to
said every man must decide whether to walk in the light of creative altruism
walk in the light of creative altruism
walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive
or in the darkness of destructive
or in the darkness of destructive selfishness every business has to decide
selfishness every business has to decide
selfishness every business has to decide that too
that too
that too so let’s choose the light
so let’s choose the light
so let’s choose the light hey Sam are you listening thank you
hey Sam are you listening thank you
hey Sam are you listening thank you [Applause]
”
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