good morning everybody I am so glad to be here with you and Wow
I am so glad to be here with you and Wow
I am so glad to be here with you and Wow sixth graders I think you’re probably
sixth graders I think you’re probably
sixth graders I think you’re probably going to be one of my toughest crowds
going to be one of my toughest crowds
going to be one of my toughest crowds what do you think I want you to be
what do you think I want you to be
what do you think I want you to be gentle on me I could tell you all about
gentle on me I could tell you all about
gentle on me I could tell you all about my educational career I could even tell
my educational career I could even tell
my educational career I could even tell you about speaking at the White House
you about speaking at the White House
you about speaking at the White House and some of the amazing people that I’ve
and some of the amazing people that I’ve
and some of the amazing people that I’ve met but I decided to go back to when I
met but I decided to go back to when I
met but I decided to go back to when I was a 6th grader and tell you about some
was a 6th grader and tell you about some
was a 6th grader and tell you about some of the lessons that I learned that sound
of the lessons that I learned that sound
of the lessons that I learned that sound all right you know one of the biggest
all right you know one of the biggest
all right you know one of the biggest things about me and about anyone who has
things about me and about anyone who has
things about me and about anyone who has had any level of success is their
had any level of success is their
had any level of success is their ability to build relationships and so
ability to build relationships and so
ability to build relationships and so when I thought about the topics that I
when I thought about the topics that I
when I thought about the topics that I was given to consider to speak with you
was given to consider to speak with you
was given to consider to speak with you about today
about today
about today I thought about relationships so I want
I thought about relationships so I want
I thought about relationships so I want to take you back into my sixth grade
to take you back into my sixth grade
to take you back into my sixth grade year in a school called Mira Vista
year in a school called Mira Vista
year in a school called Mira Vista Elementary School in the city of El
Elementary School in the city of El
Elementary School in the city of El Cerrito California it was a school very
Cerrito California it was a school very
Cerrito California it was a school very much like this lots of diversity lots of
much like this lots of diversity lots of
much like this lots of diversity lots of beautiful young people and lots of
beautiful young people and lots of
beautiful young people and lots of amazing staff members who cared about
amazing staff members who cared about
amazing staff members who cared about each one of us I remember the summer of
each one of us I remember the summer of
each one of us I remember the summer of my fifth grade year during the summer of
my fifth grade year during the summer of
my fifth grade year during the summer of my fifth grade year I had a lot of
my fifth grade year I had a lot of
my fifth grade year I had a lot of anxiety I was really really worried
anxiety I was really really worried
anxiety I was really really worried there was a reason for that worried you
there was a reason for that worried you
there was a reason for that worried you know just before my fifth the summer of
know just before my fifth the summer of
know just before my fifth the summer of my fifth grade year I found out that I
my fifth grade year I found out that I
my fifth grade year I found out that I was going to have a teacher named mrs.
was going to have a teacher named mrs.
was going to have a teacher named mrs. de Mertz
de Mertz
de Mertz now mrs. de Virts was the meanest
now mrs. de Virts was the meanest
now mrs. de Virts was the meanest teacher in the school according to all
teacher in the school according to all
teacher in the school according to all of the students and so all summer long I
of the students and so all summer long I
of the students and so all summer long I thought oh mrs. de Mertz my sixth grade
thought oh mrs. de Mertz my sixth grade
thought oh mrs. de Mertz my sixth grade year is going to be a wash
year is going to be a wash
year is going to be a wash actually I had never spoken with mrs. de
actually I had never spoken with mrs. de
actually I had never spoken with mrs. de Mertz
Mertz
Mertz I don’t Elise seen her in the hallway
I don’t Elise seen her in the hallway
I don’t Elise seen her in the hallway and I remember her horn rimmed glasses
and I remember her horn rimmed glasses
and I remember her horn rimmed glasses and she wore one of those beehive
and she wore one of those beehive
and she wore one of those beehive hairdos and she always had a very
hairdos and she always had a very
hairdos and she always had a very serious look on her face I also remember
serious look on her face I also remember
serious look on her face I also remember the click-click-click of her heels in
the click-click-click of her heels in
the click-click-click of her heels in the hallway I know that she I had I
the hallway I know that she I had I
the hallway I know that she I had I actually loved school I loved school a
actually loved school I loved school a
actually loved school I loved school a lot I actually had decided in third
lot I actually had decided in third
lot I actually had decided in third grade that I wanted to be a teacher and
grade that I wanted to be a teacher and
grade that I wanted to be a teacher and I figured perhaps that mrs. de Mertz
I figured perhaps that mrs. de Mertz
I figured perhaps that mrs. de Mertz might crush that dream the first day was
might crush that dream the first day was
might crush that dream the first day was like any other day mrs. de verts had
like any other day mrs. de verts had
like any other day mrs. de verts had those activities you know the ones the
those activities you know the ones the
those activities you know the ones the warm-up activities everybody gets to
warm-up activities everybody gets to
warm-up activities everybody gets to know each other we go outside for a game
know each other we go outside for a game
know each other we go outside for a game of kickball and it’s all very exciting I
started to think maybe I had
started to think maybe I had second-guessed or not been quite clear
second-guessed or not been quite clear
second-guessed or not been quite clear about who mrs. de Mertz really was one
about who mrs. de Mertz really was one
about who mrs. de Mertz really was one day my mom was going to be late picking
day my mom was going to be late picking
day my mom was going to be late picking me up my mom worked in San Francisco you
me up my mom worked in San Francisco you
me up my mom worked in San Francisco you know anything about El Cerrito to San
know anything about El Cerrito to San
know anything about El Cerrito to San Francisco that’s a very very long drive
Francisco that’s a very very long drive
Francisco that’s a very very long drive so I had to stay and with mrs. de Mertz
so I had to stay and with mrs. de Mertz
so I had to stay and with mrs. de Mertz for half an hour after school Oh God
for half an hour after school Oh God
for half an hour after school Oh God I had to stay with mrs. de MERS by
I had to stay with mrs. de MERS by
I had to stay with mrs. de MERS by myself for half an hour
actually as I thought about it during
actually as I thought about it during those first few days it hadn’t been too
those first few days it hadn’t been too
those first few days it hadn’t been too bad with her
bad with her
bad with her so maybe my anxiety could be cured by my
so maybe my anxiety could be cured by my
so maybe my anxiety could be cured by my curiosity maybe I could find out a
curiosity maybe I could find out a
curiosity maybe I could find out a little bit more about her by spending
little bit more about her by spending
little bit more about her by spending some time with her after school I
some time with her after school I
some time with her after school I remember her asking me to sharpen the
remember her asking me to sharpen the
remember her asking me to sharpen the pencils to put him in the pencil jar I
pencils to put him in the pencil jar I
pencils to put him in the pencil jar I remember her asking me to stop the home
remember her asking me to stop the home
remember her asking me to stop the home I remember her asking me to organize all
I remember her asking me to organize all
I remember her asking me to organize all the different sections in the back and
the different sections in the back and
the different sections in the back and when I finished I actually sat down to
when I finished I actually sat down to
when I finished I actually sat down to complete my homework mrs. de Mertz came
complete my homework mrs. de Mertz came
complete my homework mrs. de Mertz came and sat down right next to me
and sat down right next to me
and sat down right next to me in fact she sat so close that I could
in fact she sat so close that I could
in fact she sat so close that I could smell her estee lauder perfume I thought
smell her estee lauder perfume I thought
smell her estee lauder perfume I thought oh no this is really not going to end
oh no this is really not going to end
oh no this is really not going to end well the interesting part is that she
well the interesting part is that she
well the interesting part is that she actually started asking me about my
actually started asking me about my
actually started asking me about my family asking me about my friends asking
family asking me about my friends asking
family asking me about my friends asking me about my hobbies and then she said
me about my hobbies and then she said
me about my hobbies and then she said something interesting she said before I
something interesting she said before I
something interesting she said before I ever met you Ramona my name is Ramona
ever met you Ramona my name is Ramona
ever met you Ramona my name is Ramona yes Ramona the pest before I ever met
yes Ramona the pest before I ever met
yes Ramona the pest before I ever met you she said I actually found out from
you she said I actually found out from
you she said I actually found out from your fifth grade teacher that you were
your fifth grade teacher that you were
your fifth grade teacher that you were very bright and that you wanted to be a
very bright and that you wanted to be a
very bright and that you wanted to be a teacher and that you could be a
teacher and that you could be a
teacher and that you could be a tremendous help to me in my class I felt
tremendous help to me in my class I felt
tremendous help to me in my class I felt horrible I had made all of these stories
horrible I had made all of these stories
horrible I had made all of these stories up in my mind about who mrs. don’t Mertz
up in my mind about who mrs. don’t Mertz
up in my mind about who mrs. don’t Mertz was I had heard that she was mean I
was I had heard that she was mean I
was I had heard that she was mean I believed all of those young people
believed all of those young people
believed all of those young people without ever giving her a chance
without ever giving her a chance
without ever giving her a chance I found out them actually that curiosity
I found out them actually that curiosity
I found out them actually that curiosity can cure your anxiety and I remembered a
can cure your anxiety and I remembered a
can cure your anxiety and I remembered a lesson that my mother had taught me
lesson that my mother had taught me
lesson that my mother had taught me maybe your mom teaches you that same
maybe your mom teaches you that same
maybe your mom teaches you that same lesson the lesson is give everyone an A
lesson the lesson is give everyone an A
lesson the lesson is give everyone an A until they earn an F again the lesson is
until they earn an F again the lesson is
until they earn an F again the lesson is give everyone an A until they earn
give everyone an A until they earn
give everyone an A until they earn enough
once I had finished kind of sharing with
once I had finished kind of sharing with mrs. de Mertz who I was she had an
mrs. de Mertz who I was she had an
mrs. de Mertz who I was she had an opportunity to share with me who she was
opportunity to share with me who she was
opportunity to share with me who she was actually mrs. de Mertz had decided that
actually mrs. de Mertz had decided that
actually mrs. de Mertz had decided that she was going to be a teacher about at
she was going to be a teacher about at
she was going to be a teacher about at the same age that I decided which was
the same age that I decided which was
the same age that I decided which was third grade mrs. de Mertz
third grade mrs. de Mertz
third grade mrs. de Mertz actually had was the daughter of
actually had was the daughter of
actually had was the daughter of immigrants who took education very
immigrants who took education very
immigrants who took education very seriously mrs. de Mertz actually was one
seriously mrs. de Mertz actually was one
seriously mrs. de Mertz actually was one who believed in all of her students so I
who believed in all of her students so I
who believed in all of her students so I figured that what had happened was that
figured that what had happened was that
figured that what had happened was that students were afraid of her because she
students were afraid of her because she
students were afraid of her because she held very high expectations for all of
held very high expectations for all of
held very high expectations for all of us she expected all of us to complete
us she expected all of us to complete
us she expected all of us to complete our homework she expected all of us to
our homework she expected all of us to
our homework she expected all of us to do all of the mathematic problems she
do all of the mathematic problems she
do all of the mathematic problems she expected all of us to be successful
expected all of us to be successful
expected all of us to be successful professionals at the end of the day I
reminded of another lesson that my
reminded of another lesson that my parents had taught me and that lesson is
parents had taught me and that lesson is
parents had taught me and that lesson is give everyone the benefit of the doubt
give everyone the benefit of the doubt
give everyone the benefit of the doubt give everyone the benefit of the doubt
many years later after I had graduated
many years later after I had graduated from UC Berkeley and enrolled in a
from UC Berkeley and enrolled in a
from UC Berkeley and enrolled in a teacher education program at the
teacher education program at the
teacher education program at the University of San Francisco I came back
University of San Francisco I came back
University of San Francisco I came back to me revista Elementary School in fact
to me revista Elementary School in fact
to me revista Elementary School in fact I came back to the very classroom where
I came back to the very classroom where
I came back to the very classroom where mrs. de Mertz had taught me I was a
mrs. de Mertz had taught me I was a
mrs. de Mertz had taught me I was a student teacher then I had a teacher
student teacher then I had a teacher
student teacher then I had a teacher that in retrospect actually looked very
that in retrospect actually looked very
that in retrospect actually looked very much like mrs. de Mertz just a slightly
much like mrs. de Mertz just a slightly
much like mrs. de Mertz just a slightly younger version I remember thinking
younger version I remember thinking
younger version I remember thinking about her and thinking about all the
about her and thinking about all the
about her and thinking about all the lessons that she had taught me or
lessons that she had taught me or
lessons that she had taught me or lessons that I’ve learned from her
lessons that I’ve learned from her
lessons that I’ve learned from her through my mom and dad’s words I was in
through my mom and dad’s words I was in
through my mom and dad’s words I was in the middle one day of lesson that I had
the middle one day of lesson that I had
the middle one day of lesson that I had to teach when you’re a student teacher
to teach when you’re a student teacher
to teach when you’re a student teacher you have to take over the class as a
you have to take over the class as a
you have to take over the class as a part of your learning and I remember
part of your learning and I remember
part of your learning and I remember doing that
doing that
doing that a young man named Joe in the middle of
a young man named Joe in the middle of
a young man named Joe in the middle of my lesson boys and girls a young man
my lesson boys and girls a young man
my lesson boys and girls a young man named Joe got up and walked out and left
named Joe got up and walked out and left
named Joe got up and walked out and left the classroom and slammed the door I
the classroom and slammed the door I
the classroom and slammed the door I couldn’t believe it I was stunned was I
couldn’t believe it I was stunned was I
couldn’t believe it I was stunned was I a failure was I actually destined to be
a failure was I actually destined to be
a failure was I actually destined to be a teacher I couldn’t believe that Joe
a teacher I couldn’t believe that Joe
a teacher I couldn’t believe that Joe had done that I didn’t understand it to
had done that I didn’t understand it to
had done that I didn’t understand it to make it even worse my supervisor was
make it even worse my supervisor was
make it even worse my supervisor was there taking notes looking at how I was
there taking notes looking at how I was
there taking notes looking at how I was teaching and determining what my grade
teaching and determining what my grade
teaching and determining what my grade was going to be in my student teaching
was going to be in my student teaching
was going to be in my student teaching class I remember the master teacher
class I remember the master teacher
class I remember the master teacher leaving the classroom I remember her
leaving the classroom I remember her
leaving the classroom I remember her coming back but she didn’t come back
coming back but she didn’t come back
coming back but she didn’t come back with Joe and I was in high anxiety later
with Joe and I was in high anxiety later
with Joe and I was in high anxiety later that day after I had finished all the
that day after I had finished all the
that day after I had finished all the duties of the day I received a call from
duties of the day I received a call from
duties of the day I received a call from Joe’s mother and Joe’s mother told me
Joe’s mother and Joe’s mother told me
Joe’s mother and Joe’s mother told me that Joe had come home and been very
that Joe had come home and been very
that Joe had come home and been very disgusted and that she wanted to meet
disgusted and that she wanted to meet
disgusted and that she wanted to meet with me right after school my heart beat
with me right after school my heart beat
with me right after school my heart beat could be felt throughout the entire
could be felt throughout the entire
could be felt throughout the entire school
school
school what did Joe’s mother want with me what
what did Joe’s mother want with me what
what did Joe’s mother want with me what I done so wrong to Joe about an hour
I done so wrong to Joe about an hour
I done so wrong to Joe about an hour later Joe’s mom and and he showed up in
later Joe’s mom and and he showed up in
later Joe’s mom and and he showed up in the classroom again I’m in the very same
the classroom again I’m in the very same
the classroom again I’m in the very same classroom where I learned from mrs. de
classroom where I learned from mrs. de
classroom where I learned from mrs. de Mertz
Mertz
Mertz Joe’s mom says I heard about you hmm
Joe’s mom says I heard about you hmm
Joe’s mom says I heard about you hmm I thought yeah I heard that you think
I thought yeah I heard that you think
I thought yeah I heard that you think that you’re better than everybody at
that you’re better than everybody at
that you’re better than everybody at this school and that you never call on
this school and that you never call on
this school and that you never call on Joe I took a deep breath and I thought
Joe I took a deep breath and I thought
Joe I took a deep breath and I thought about mrs. de Mertz in fact it was
about mrs. de Mertz in fact it was
about mrs. de Mertz in fact it was almost like she was sitting there with
almost like she was sitting there with
almost like she was sitting there with her estee lauder perfume I thought what
her estee lauder perfume I thought what
her estee lauder perfume I thought what would mrs.
would mrs.
would mrs. do so I looked at Joe and I said you
do so I looked at Joe and I said you
do so I looked at Joe and I said you know before I ever took this class I met
know before I ever took this class I met
know before I ever took this class I met with the master teacher and I asked the
with the master teacher and I asked the
with the master teacher and I asked the master teacher about each and every one
master teacher about each and every one
master teacher about each and every one of you
of you
of you I found out Joe that you’re a skilled
I found out Joe that you’re a skilled
I found out Joe that you’re a skilled musician and that one day you want to be
musician and that one day you want to be
musician and that one day you want to be a conductor and I was thrilled and I
a conductor and I was thrilled and I
a conductor and I was thrilled and I couldn’t wait to be your teacher I truly
couldn’t wait to be your teacher I truly
couldn’t wait to be your teacher I truly truly apologize Joe if you felt that I
truly apologize Joe if you felt that I
truly apologize Joe if you felt that I was not asking you any questions I
was not asking you any questions I
was not asking you any questions I apologize from the bottom of my heart
Joe’s mother stared at me
Joe’s mother stared at me she couldn’t believe it she thought I
she couldn’t believe it she thought I
she couldn’t believe it she thought I was going to get all upset about what
was going to get all upset about what
was going to get all upset about what she had said about me she thought that I
she had said about me she thought that I
she had said about me she thought that I was going to get angry about what Joe
was going to get angry about what Joe
was going to get angry about what Joe had come home and told her I began to
had come home and told her I began to
had come home and told her I began to ask his mother questions questions about
ask his mother questions questions about
ask his mother questions questions about the family questions about their friends
the family questions about their friends
the family questions about their friends and their hobbies I remember learning a
and their hobbies I remember learning a
and their hobbies I remember learning a lesson then that I don’t think my mom
lesson then that I don’t think my mom
lesson then that I don’t think my mom and dad had taught me yet let your
and dad had taught me yet let your
and dad had taught me yet let your curiosity be matched with your
curiosity be matched with your
curiosity be matched with your compassion I could have gotten all angry
compassion I could have gotten all angry
compassion I could have gotten all angry I could have been mean to Joe and his
I could have been mean to Joe and his
I could have been mean to Joe and his mom based on what they said but instead
mom based on what they said but instead
mom based on what they said but instead I began to ask them questions like mrs.
I began to ask them questions like mrs.
I began to ask them questions like mrs. de Mertz had done me and I began to
de Mertz had done me and I began to
de Mertz had done me and I began to learn even more about Joe and his family
learn even more about Joe and his family
learn even more about Joe and his family than I already knew as educators we
than I already knew as educators we
than I already knew as educators we often speak to students about curiosity
often speak to students about curiosity
often speak to students about curiosity being at the edge of innovation you’ve
being at the edge of innovation you’ve
being at the edge of innovation you’ve learned all about the great inventors
learned all about the great inventors
learned all about the great inventors whether it’s Albert Einstein or George
whether it’s Albert Einstein or George
whether it’s Albert Einstein or George Washington Carver all of those
Washington Carver all of those
Washington Carver all of those individuals were incredibly curious and
individuals were incredibly curious and
individuals were incredibly curious and that curiosity led to some of the
that curiosity led to some of the
that curiosity led to some of the wonderful innovation that we have now
wonderful innovation that we have now
wonderful innovation that we have now but curiosity can also be a
but curiosity can also be a
but curiosity can also be a great relationship starter and builder
great relationship starter and builder
great relationship starter and builder curiosity leads to understanding serving
curiosity leads to understanding serving
curiosity leads to understanding serving as a cure for anxiety as long as you
as a cure for anxiety as long as you
as a cure for anxiety as long as you give everyone an a until they earn an F
give everyone an a until they earn an F
give everyone an a until they earn an F as you always give people the benefit of
as you always give people the benefit of
as you always give people the benefit of the doubt
the doubt
the doubt and you let your curiosity be matched
and you let your curiosity be matched
and you let your curiosity be matched with compassion in closing boys and
with compassion in closing boys and
with compassion in closing boys and girls let me say a couple of things one
girls let me say a couple of things one
girls let me say a couple of things one as I think about the lessons I learned
as I think about the lessons I learned
as I think about the lessons I learned in sixth grade
in sixth grade
in sixth grade actually they were lessons that my
actually they were lessons that my
actually they were lessons that my mother and father had taught me there
mother and father had taught me there
mother and father had taught me there are so many lines and things that your
are so many lines and things that your
are so many lines and things that your mom and dad might say that they won’t
mom and dad might say that they won’t
mom and dad might say that they won’t become reality until later when you
become reality until later when you
become reality until later when you learn a little bit more about what they
learn a little bit more about what they
learn a little bit more about what they actually were trying to say
actually were trying to say
actually were trying to say are you experiencing something that
are you experiencing something that
are you experiencing something that helps you there’s another thing that
helps you there’s another thing that
helps you there’s another thing that curiosity can cure and that is the
curiosity can cure and that is the
curiosity can cure and that is the person who gets on your last nerve does
person who gets on your last nerve does
person who gets on your last nerve does anybody have one of those it could be
anybody have one of those it could be
anybody have one of those it could be the bully in the classroom it could be
the bully in the classroom it could be
the bully in the classroom it could be your best friend sometimes curiosity can
your best friend sometimes curiosity can
your best friend sometimes curiosity can cure those things all you have to do is
cure those things all you have to do is
cure those things all you have to do is step back and think about not yourself
step back and think about not yourself
step back and think about not yourself but the other person I actually was a
but the other person I actually was a
but the other person I actually was a very tiny sixth grader I wore a 13 baby
very tiny sixth grader I wore a 13 baby
very tiny sixth grader I wore a 13 baby shoe super little and I could have been
shoe super little and I could have been
shoe super little and I could have been the subject for many many bullies in
the subject for many many bullies in
the subject for many many bullies in fact I was initially but in sixth grade
fact I was initially but in sixth grade
fact I was initially but in sixth grade I learned how to get close to the
I learned how to get close to the
I learned how to get close to the bullies and ask them questions that
bullies and ask them questions that
bullies and ask them questions that allowed me to build relationships with
allowed me to build relationships with
allowed me to build relationships with them and eventually I learned that that
them and eventually I learned that that
them and eventually I learned that that helps me even an adulthood it helps me I
helps me even an adulthood it helps me I
helps me even an adulthood it helps me I hope that something I’ve said has
hope that something I’ve said has
hope that something I’ve said has stimulated today I’m so thankful that
stimulated today I’m so thankful that
stimulated today I’m so thankful that you all were my audience today and I ask
you all were my audience today and I ask
you all were my audience today and I ask you to certainly hopefully take
you to certainly hopefully take
you to certainly hopefully take something that I’ve said and build
something that I’ve said and build
something that I’ve said and build relationships and be successful in your
relationships and be successful in your
relationships and be successful in your own lives thank you so much for the
own lives thank you so much for the
own lives thank you so much for the opportunity to share with you you were a
opportunity to share with you you were a
opportunity to share with you you were a powerful and dynamic audience
powerful and dynamic audience
powerful and dynamic audience thank you so much
thank you so much
thank you so much [Applause]
”
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