do I belong in hell am i traveling down the low road we’re going up the high
the low road we’re going up the high
the low road we’re going up the high road in 1986 when I was 12 years old I
road in 1986 when I was 12 years old I
road in 1986 when I was 12 years old I had the opportunity to contemplate this
had the opportunity to contemplate this
had the opportunity to contemplate this question after watching an episode of
question after watching an episode of
question after watching an episode of The Twilight Zone it was a story titled
The Twilight Zone it was a story titled
The Twilight Zone it was a story titled dead run and it was about a truck driver
dead run and it was about a truck driver
dead run and it was about a truck driver who drove drove the souls of the dead to
who drove drove the souls of the dead to
who drove drove the souls of the dead to hell and the imagery of that show that
hell and the imagery of that show that
hell and the imagery of that show that still haunts me when I look back I
still haunts me when I look back I
still haunts me when I look back I realized that the imagery mirrored the
realized that the imagery mirrored the
realized that the imagery mirrored the imagery during the Holocaust and those
imagery during the Holocaust and those
imagery during the Holocaust and those pictures where they basically shoved
pictures where they basically shoved
pictures where they basically shoved people into the boxcars to send them off
people into the boxcars to send them off
people into the boxcars to send them off to the concentration camps in this case
to the concentration camps in this case
to the concentration camps in this case they were shoving these Souls into the
they were shoving these Souls into the
they were shoving these Souls into the back of cattle trucks so the driver at
back of cattle trucks so the driver at
back of cattle trucks so the driver at some point he realizes that hell is
some point he realizes that hell is
some point he realizes that hell is really overcrowded and he’s just
really overcrowded and he’s just
really overcrowded and he’s just wondering like why are there’s so many
wondering like why are there’s so many
wondering like why are there’s so many people going down here so he decides to
people going down here so he decides to
people going down here so he decides to interview the people in the back of his
interview the people in the back of his
interview the people in the back of his truck and when he goes back to ask them
truck and when he goes back to ask them
truck and when he goes back to ask them what their crimes against God are some
what their crimes against God are some
what their crimes against God are some of them admit to their evil ways but at
of them admit to their evil ways but at
of them admit to their evil ways but at least four of them are very bewildered
least four of them are very bewildered
least four of them are very bewildered about why they were there one of them is
about why they were there one of them is
about why they were there one of them is this elderly lady who confesses that she
this elderly lady who confesses that she
this elderly lady who confesses that she was a public librarian who protected
was a public librarian who protected
was a public librarian who protected some controversial books on her shelves
some controversial books on her shelves
some controversial books on her shelves another man says well I the draft I
another man says well I the draft I
another man says well I the draft I didn’t want to kill anyone
didn’t want to kill anyone
didn’t want to kill anyone and another woman says well I was a
and another woman says well I was a
and another woman says well I was a junkie and I shot myself up with all
junkie and I shot myself up with all
junkie and I shot myself up with all kinds of poison
kinds of poison
kinds of poison I was stupid but I didn’t hurt anyone
I was stupid but I didn’t hurt anyone
I was stupid but I didn’t hurt anyone else and finally they get to this young
else and finally they get to this young
else and finally they get to this young man who looks potentially more
man who looks potentially more
man who looks potentially more bewildered than anyone else he says I
bewildered than anyone else he says I
bewildered than anyone else he says I don’t I don’t know why I’m here I don’t
don’t I don’t know why I’m here I don’t
don’t I don’t know why I’m here I don’t unless no that’s crazy they wouldn’t put
unless no that’s crazy they wouldn’t put
unless no that’s crazy they wouldn’t put me here just for being gay
me here just for being gay
me here just for being gay so the truck driver in his wisdom he
so the truck driver in his wisdom he
so the truck driver in his wisdom he realizes these four are innocent and he
realizes these four are innocent and he
realizes these four are innocent and he sets them go he let
sets them go he let
sets them go he let out of the back of his truck and he lets
out of the back of his truck and he lets
out of the back of his truck and he lets them go to points them in the general
them go to points them in the general
them go to points them in the general direction of the high road and one of
direction of the high road and one of
direction of the high road and one of the other things I really remember about
the other things I really remember about
the other things I really remember about this moment in this experience was I was
this moment in this experience was I was
this moment in this experience was I was watching it with someone else in my
watching it with someone else in my
watching it with someone else in my family and this person who liked the
family and this person who liked the
family and this person who liked the rest of my family didn’t really buy into
rest of my family didn’t really buy into
rest of my family didn’t really buy into the salvation being sold at our local
the salvation being sold at our local
the salvation being sold at our local small town churches and wasn’t fond of
small town churches and wasn’t fond of
small town churches and wasn’t fond of Hellfire and brimstone
Hellfire and brimstone
Hellfire and brimstone she didn’t object to three of the people
she didn’t object to three of the people
she didn’t object to three of the people being set go the the librarian the
being set go the the librarian the
being set go the the librarian the draft-dodger and even the junkie but she
draft-dodger and even the junkie but she
draft-dodger and even the junkie but she complained that last one that last one
complained that last one that last one
complained that last one that last one was a mistake
was a mistake
was a mistake gays belong in hell this gave me pause
gays belong in hell this gave me pause
gays belong in hell this gave me pause this is about like 10 years before Ellen
this is about like 10 years before Ellen
this is about like 10 years before Ellen Ellen DeGeneres came out of the closet
Ellen DeGeneres came out of the closet
Ellen DeGeneres came out of the closet it was you know about a decade before
it was you know about a decade before
it was you know about a decade before the word transgender was being used and
the word transgender was being used and
the word transgender was being used and I didn’t really know what I was I just
I didn’t really know what I was I just
I didn’t really know what I was I just knew like looking at myself and kind of
knew like looking at myself and kind of
knew like looking at myself and kind of trying to figure myself out I was
trying to figure myself out I was
trying to figure myself out I was different than my four brothers and you
different than my four brothers and you
different than my four brothers and you know I any sense of what a gay man was
know I any sense of what a gay man was
know I any sense of what a gay man was like was from in the 1980s the
like was from in the 1980s the
like was from in the 1980s the television shows
television shows
television shows they offered pretty stereotypical
they offered pretty stereotypical
they offered pretty stereotypical portrayals of gay men and they just
portrayals of gay men and they just
portrayals of gay men and they just seemed more like women you know they
seemed more like women you know they
seemed more like women you know they were more flamboyant so I thought well
were more flamboyant so I thought well
were more flamboyant so I thought well maybe that’s me and I worried you know
maybe that’s me and I worried you know
maybe that’s me and I worried you know do I just like a commentary that I had
do I just like a commentary that I had
do I just like a commentary that I had belong in hell and in any moment you
belong in hell and in any moment you
belong in hell and in any moment you know when I had a chance when I was by
know when I had a chance when I was by
know when I had a chance when I was by myself you know I would I would dress up
myself you know I would I would dress up
myself you know I would I would dress up and and I would dream of being a girl
and and I would dream of being a girl
and and I would dream of being a girl but I knew that this wasn’t acceptable
but I knew that this wasn’t acceptable
but I knew that this wasn’t acceptable and I didn’t you know really worried not
and I didn’t you know really worried not
and I didn’t you know really worried not only just about my eternal salvation but
only just about my eternal salvation but
only just about my eternal salvation but also just about my family’s acceptance
also just about my family’s acceptance
also just about my family’s acceptance of me and so when I went into high
of me and so when I went into high
of me and so when I went into high school you know I did my best to really
school you know I did my best to really
school you know I did my best to really pass as a boy I really you know I got
pass as a boy I really you know I got
pass as a boy I really you know I got into fistfights I dated girls and I I
into fistfights I dated girls and I I
into fistfights I dated girls and I I you know did everything I could to sort
you know did everything I could to sort
you know did everything I could to sort of prove to myself my emerging manhood
of prove to myself my emerging manhood
of prove to myself my emerging manhood and I even went started going to church
and I even went started going to church
and I even went started going to church in my parents neighborhood and kind of
in my parents neighborhood and kind of
in my parents neighborhood and kind of felt the presence of God for the first
felt the presence of God for the first
felt the presence of God for the first time when I went to college I had I had
time when I went to college I had I had
time when I went to college I had I had been telling myself for so long you know
been telling myself for so long you know
been telling myself for so long you know when you grow up this will just go away
when you grow up this will just go away
when you grow up this will just go away you know you can get rid of this so I’m
you know you can get rid of this so I’m
you know you can get rid of this so I’m going to conquer this
going to conquer this
going to conquer this and I would hear people talk about you
and I would hear people talk about you
and I would hear people talk about you know gays in particular and they’d be
know gays in particular and they’d be
know gays in particular and they’d be like oh they can’t change that about
like oh they can’t change that about
like oh they can’t change that about themselves thought that’s a bunch of
themselves thought that’s a bunch of
themselves thought that’s a bunch of liberal nonsense but by the time I got
liberal nonsense but by the time I got
liberal nonsense but by the time I got to college in 1992 I was pretty aware
to college in 1992 I was pretty aware
to college in 1992 I was pretty aware this isn’t going away I’m kind of an
this isn’t going away I’m kind of an
this isn’t going away I’m kind of an adult now and I actually came out to my
adult now and I actually came out to my
adult now and I actually came out to my college friends at the end of when I
college friends at the end of when I
college friends at the end of when I finished my bachelor’s degree and came
finished my bachelor’s degree and came
finished my bachelor’s degree and came out as transgender and my interestingly
out as transgender and my interestingly
out as transgender and my interestingly enough my faith in God started to
enough my faith in God started to
enough my faith in God started to strengthen at this time not so much
strengthen at this time not so much
strengthen at this time not so much about that with that fear of Hell but I
about that with that fear of Hell but I
about that with that fear of Hell but I was more concerned logically that I
was more concerned logically that I
was more concerned logically that I couldn’t value other people if I didn’t
couldn’t value other people if I didn’t
couldn’t value other people if I didn’t value the universe in which we existed
value the universe in which we existed
value the universe in which we existed in thought well it’s not logical to care
in thought well it’s not logical to care
in thought well it’s not logical to care about something inside of something else
about something inside of something else
about something inside of something else that has no value and I didn’t want love
that has no value and I didn’t want love
that has no value and I didn’t want love to be this sort of self-serving illusion
to be this sort of self-serving illusion
to be this sort of self-serving illusion this mere byproduct of survival and
this mere byproduct of survival and
this mere byproduct of survival and evolution so by the time I’m getting
evolution so by the time I’m getting
evolution so by the time I’m getting ready to go to grad school I go back to
ready to go to grad school I go back to
ready to go to grad school I go back to my parents house for the summer this is
my parents house for the summer this is
my parents house for the summer this is 1997 and I’m thinking all I have kind of
1997 and I’m thinking all I have kind of
1997 and I’m thinking all I have kind of maybe the low road or the high road
maybe the low road or the high road
maybe the low road or the high road question again do I go down to grad
question again do I go down to grad
question again do I go down to grad school and present as a trans woman do I
school and present as a trans woman do I
school and present as a trans woman do I do I enter this sort of new life as
do I enter this sort of new life as
do I enter this sort of new life as myself and it tore me up inside it was
myself and it tore me up inside it was
myself and it tore me up inside it was like a tug of war on the inside and I
like a tug of war on the inside and I
like a tug of war on the inside and I you know the biggest thing I still
you know the biggest thing I still
you know the biggest thing I still didn’t want to let down my family and I
didn’t want to let down my family and I
didn’t want to let down my family and I had four brothers a sister two parents
had four brothers a sister two parents
had four brothers a sister two parents and I also I just didn’t want to be
and I also I just didn’t want to be
and I also I just didn’t want to be rejected or causing any unnecessary pain
rejected or causing any unnecessary pain
rejected or causing any unnecessary pain and so one night when I’m home from work
and so one night when I’m home from work
and so one night when I’m home from work during the summer time in my parents
during the summer time in my parents
during the summer time in my parents house they’re in bed I’m just trying to
house they’re in bed I’m just trying to
house they’re in bed I’m just trying to distract myself from this whole question
distract myself from this whole question
distract myself from this whole question I’m just trying to watch television and
I’m just trying to watch television and
I’m just trying to watch television and flip through channels and I end up in
flip through channels and I end up in
flip through channels and I end up in tears just with desperation like not
tears just with desperation like not
tears just with desperation like not sure what to do and I get to this
sure what to do and I get to this
sure what to do and I get to this televangelist and he’s saying come to
televangelist and he’s saying come to
televangelist and he’s saying come to the TV screen say this prayer with me
the TV screen say this prayer with me
the TV screen say this prayer with me put your hands up to mine and accept the
put your hands up to mine and accept the
put your hands up to mine and accept the love of Jesus in your heart accept him
love of Jesus in your heart accept him
love of Jesus in your heart accept him as a saviour and despite my love of
as a saviour and despite my love of
as a saviour and despite my love of logic and reason inexplicably I found
logic and reason inexplicably I found
logic and reason inexplicably I found myself doing just that so when I went to
myself doing just that so when I went to
myself doing just that so when I went to grad school I
grad school I
grad school I as this confident sort of born-again
as this confident sort of born-again
as this confident sort of born-again Christian who thought I could really
Christian who thought I could really
Christian who thought I could really defeat my gender identity and I met a
defeat my gender identity and I met a
defeat my gender identity and I met a girl and I fell in love with her at
girl and I fell in love with her at
girl and I fell in love with her at first sight and we dated and I told her
first sight and we dated and I told her
first sight and we dated and I told her well this is what I struggle with but I
well this is what I struggle with but I
well this is what I struggle with but I think God he wants me to be a normal man
think God he wants me to be a normal man
think God he wants me to be a normal man and so we were married for 17 years we
and so we were married for 17 years we
and so we were married for 17 years we had six kids four adopted kids two
had six kids four adopted kids two
had six kids four adopted kids two biological kids still have them and
biological kids still have them and
biological kids still have them and during that time we you know I kept
during that time we you know I kept
during that time we you know I kept going to church on Sunday I kept reading
going to church on Sunday I kept reading
going to church on Sunday I kept reading the Bible maybe not habitually but
the Bible maybe not habitually but
the Bible maybe not habitually but pretty regularly and I kept praying to
pretty regularly and I kept praying to
pretty regularly and I kept praying to God to take this away from me because it
God to take this away from me because it
God to take this away from me because it didn’t go away I was sure if I was with
didn’t go away I was sure if I was with
didn’t go away I was sure if I was with that beautiful woman I was sure that
that beautiful woman I was sure that
that beautiful woman I was sure that would fix me I mean how could I not feel
would fix me I mean how could I not feel
would fix me I mean how could I not feel like a man with this beautiful woman
like a man with this beautiful woman
like a man with this beautiful woman next to me as my wife it didn’t go away
next to me as my wife it didn’t go away
next to me as my wife it didn’t go away and it kept causing issues in our
and it kept causing issues in our
and it kept causing issues in our marriage and still you know I went to
marriage and still you know I went to
marriage and still you know I went to men’s group every week I opened up to
men’s group every week I opened up to
men’s group every week I opened up to pastors I opened up to the men in my
pastors I opened up to the men in my
pastors I opened up to the men in my men’s group and I did two marathons and
men’s group and I did two marathons and
men’s group and I did two marathons and you know kind of close to the end of our
you know kind of close to the end of our
you know kind of close to the end of our marriage when things were really getting
marriage when things were really getting
marriage when things were really getting bad I was like I’ll just be really
bad I was like I’ll just be really
bad I was like I’ll just be really masculine and I went got in shape did
masculine and I went got in shape did
masculine and I went got in shape did marathons I did two tough mudders
marathons I did two tough mudders
marathons I did two tough mudders you’ve got electrocuted and did all
you’ve got electrocuted and did all
you’ve got electrocuted and did all kinds of manly stuff and I felt kind of
kinds of manly stuff and I felt kind of
kinds of manly stuff and I felt kind of manly but it still didn’t get rid of
manly but it still didn’t get rid of
manly but it still didn’t get rid of that inner sense that I wasn’t a man
that inner sense that I wasn’t a man
that inner sense that I wasn’t a man and so in 2015 my wife decided to
and so in 2015 my wife decided to
and so in 2015 my wife decided to divorce and I don’t blame her because
divorce and I don’t blame her because
divorce and I don’t blame her because she was a heterosexual woman and I think
she was a heterosexual woman and I think
she was a heterosexual woman and I think she kind of realized it’s like okay this
she kind of realized it’s like okay this
she kind of realized it’s like okay this this guy’s having to struggle to be the
this guy’s having to struggle to be the
this guy’s having to struggle to be the man that I was attracted to so you know
man that I was attracted to so you know
man that I was attracted to so you know about two months after that divorce I
about two months after that divorce I
about two months after that divorce I ended up contemplating that question
ended up contemplating that question
ended up contemplating that question again the high road or the low road
again the high road or the low road
again the high road or the low road which one is it and I prayed to God I
which one is it and I prayed to God I
which one is it and I prayed to God I said which what do you want me to do now
said which what do you want me to do now
said which what do you want me to do now God and I got this really interesting
God and I got this really interesting
God and I got this really interesting answer that the greatest sin that I had
answer that the greatest sin that I had
answer that the greatest sin that I had committed was not being able to be
committed was not being able to be
committed was not being able to be authentic not being able to be honest
authentic not being able to be honest
authentic not being able to be honest with myself and so about you know two
with myself and so about you know two
with myself and so about you know two months ago after the divorce I decided
months ago after the divorce I decided
months ago after the divorce I decided to accept myself for who I was and
this was pretty difficult I I had
this was pretty difficult I I had previously rejected a lot of the
previously rejected a lot of the
previously rejected a lot of the religious dogma and legalism that said
religious dogma and legalism that said
religious dogma and legalism that said LGBT people are sinners are bad just for
LGBT people are sinners are bad just for
LGBT people are sinners are bad just for being themselves
being themselves
being themselves partly because those verses that the
partly because those verses that the
partly because those verses that the pastors and the counselors would point
pastors and the counselors would point
pastors and the counselors would point to when they were telling me to fix
to when they were telling me to fix
to when they were telling me to fix myself when they were telling me this
myself when they were telling me this
myself when they were telling me this was a sin when they were telling me this
was a sin when they were telling me this
was a sin when they were telling me this was something I needed to cure or they
was something I needed to cure or they
was something I needed to cure or they were comparing me to other sinners they
were comparing me to other sinners they
were comparing me to other sinners they would point to these verses in the Bible
would point to these verses in the Bible
would point to these verses in the Bible and the ones they pointed to who were
and the ones they pointed to who were
and the ones they pointed to who were from the Old Testament and from Paul
from the Old Testament and from Paul
from the Old Testament and from Paul from the writings of Paul and they were
from the writings of Paul and they were
from the writings of Paul and they were next to passages that denied women the
next to passages that denied women the
next to passages that denied women the right to teach the right to go outside
right to teach the right to go outside
right to teach the right to go outside with their heads uncovered they were
with their heads uncovered they were
with their heads uncovered they were right next to passages that were used to
right next to passages that were used to
right next to passages that were used to justify slavery and they were next to
justify slavery and they were next to
justify slavery and they were next to passages that even instructed parents to
passages that even instructed parents to
passages that even instructed parents to stone their disobedient children to
stone their disobedient children to
stone their disobedient children to death and when I looked at the Gospel
death and when I looked at the Gospel
death and when I looked at the Gospel accounts of Jesus and his teaching his
accounts of Jesus and his teaching his
accounts of Jesus and his teaching his example and his words I saw no common
example and his words I saw no common
example and his words I saw no common condemnation for people like me so after
condemnation for people like me so after
condemnation for people like me so after a little bit I chose this this tough
a little bit I chose this this tough
a little bit I chose this this tough road and my children who I love and I
road and my children who I love and I
road and my children who I love and I chose to stick around and be honest and
chose to stick around and be honest and
chose to stick around and be honest and for them it was hard they as they turn
for them it was hard they as they turn
for them it was hard they as they turn their backs on me to some degree before
their backs on me to some degree before
their backs on me to some degree before you know basically blaming me for all
you know basically blaming me for all
you know basically blaming me for all the changes in their life the divorce
the changes in their life the divorce
the changes in their life the divorce and everything I just prayed to keep my
and everything I just prayed to keep my
and everything I just prayed to keep my heart open to them and to love them no
heart open to them and to love them no
heart open to them and to love them no matter what and so I I basically came
matter what and so I I basically came
matter what and so I I basically came out a second time in 2016 and what I
out a second time in 2016 and what I
out a second time in 2016 and what I knew would be a very difficult road and
knew would be a very difficult road and
knew would be a very difficult road and the people in my church some of them
the people in my church some of them
the people in my church some of them showed me the genuine love of Christ
showed me the genuine love of Christ
showed me the genuine love of Christ some of them showed me more of what I
some of them showed me more of what I
some of them showed me more of what I expected that rejection I so much feared
expected that rejection I so much feared
expected that rejection I so much feared people are motivated by fear and hate by
people are motivated by fear and hate by
people are motivated by fear and hate by things they don’t understand and I had
things they don’t understand and I had
things they don’t understand and I had friends that I had been friends with for
friends that I had been friends with for
friends that I had been friends with for the better part of a decade who I didn’t
the better part of a decade who I didn’t
the better part of a decade who I didn’t hear from anymore
hear from anymore
hear from anymore years still don’t and if I run into them
years still don’t and if I run into them
years still don’t and if I run into them you know I can see the looks of
you know I can see the looks of
you know I can see the looks of condemnation the looks of judgment
condemnation the looks of judgment
condemnation the looks of judgment sometimes the looks of even disgust and
sometimes the looks of even disgust and
sometimes the looks of even disgust and when I asked my pastor if I could
when I asked my pastor if I could
when I asked my pastor if I could continue going to my church he said you
continue going to my church he said you
continue going to my church he said you will be a distraction I had a friend
will be a distraction I had a friend
will be a distraction I had a friend from grade school who wrote a letter to
from grade school who wrote a letter to
from grade school who wrote a letter to me and he says you have cut been cut
me and he says you have cut been cut
me and he says you have cut been cut down by the enemy and he even expressed
down by the enemy and he even expressed
down by the enemy and he even expressed the desire to cause physical harm to me
the desire to cause physical harm to me
the desire to cause physical harm to me for transitioning and I you know I just
for transitioning and I you know I just
for transitioning and I you know I just look at that and and also the messages
look at that and and also the messages
look at that and and also the messages and culture that I hear about Who I am
and culture that I hear about Who I am
and culture that I hear about Who I am that I’m an affront to traditional
that I’m an affront to traditional
that I’m an affront to traditional values that I’m you know something
values that I’m you know something
values that I’m you know something that’s against the sanctity of marriage
that’s against the sanctity of marriage
that’s against the sanctity of marriage and then I’m you know of course a threat
and then I’m you know of course a threat
and then I’m you know of course a threat to people in women’s bathrooms James
to people in women’s bathrooms James
to people in women’s bathrooms James Dobson who is a fundamentalist writer
Dobson who is a fundamentalist writer
Dobson who is a fundamentalist writer and founder of Focus on the Family he
and founder of Focus on the Family he
and founder of Focus on the Family he recently made comments that’s implied
recently made comments that’s implied
recently made comments that’s implied that real men should shoot transgender
that real men should shoot transgender
that real men should shoot transgender women to protect their wives and their
women to protect their wives and their
women to protect their wives and their children is it any wonder that
children is it any wonder that
children is it any wonder that transgender people have a hard time
transgender people have a hard time
transgender people have a hard time feeling loved feeling accepted or even
feeling loved feeling accepted or even
feeling loved feeling accepted or even feeling like they can survive let me be
feeling like they can survive let me be
feeling like they can survive let me be clear gays lesbians transgender people
clear gays lesbians transgender people
clear gays lesbians transgender people they’re just people and based on
they’re just people and based on
they’re just people and based on everything we know now scientifically
everything we know now scientifically
everything we know now scientifically they were most likely born that way even
they were most likely born that way even
they were most likely born that way even some of those Christian counselors they
some of those Christian counselors they
some of those Christian counselors they even accepted that they even admitted
even accepted that they even admitted
even accepted that they even admitted that they just said this is a thorn in
that they just said this is a thorn in
that they just said this is a thorn in your flesh you’re gonna have to fight
your flesh you’re gonna have to fight
your flesh you’re gonna have to fight for the rest of your life and just not
for the rest of your life and just not
for the rest of your life and just not do it but God you know just for the
do it but God you know just for the
do it but God you know just for the consideration of those of you who are
consideration of those of you who are
consideration of those of you who are stuck on that binary between Adam and
stuck on that binary between Adam and
stuck on that binary between Adam and Eve God has created there are 1 in 2,000
Eve God has created there are 1 in 2,000
Eve God has created there are 1 in 2,000 births that are intersexed babies that
births that are intersexed babies that
births that are intersexed babies that are born blessed with the mixture of
are born blessed with the mixture of
are born blessed with the mixture of male and female anatomy so God in His
male and female anatomy so God in His
male and female anatomy so God in His wisdom has created a lot of diversity
wisdom has created a lot of diversity
wisdom has created a lot of diversity with us and when gay and lesbian and
with us and when gay and lesbian and
with us and when gay and lesbian and transgender people accept themselves for
transgender people accept themselves for
transgender people accept themselves for who they are they’re not choosing a
who they are they’re not choosing a
who they are they’re not choosing a sinful lifestyle rather
sinful lifestyle rather
sinful lifestyle rather they’re choosing to survive they’re
they’re choosing to survive they’re
they’re choosing to survive they’re choosing to have the opportunity to love
choosing to have the opportunity to love
choosing to have the opportunity to love and be loved
and be loved
and be loved truly in return and this love thing
truly in return and this love thing
truly in return and this love thing that’s the real high road Christ when he
that’s the real high road Christ when he
that’s the real high road Christ when he was asked by the Pharisees what is the
was asked by the Pharisees what is the
was asked by the Pharisees what is the greatest commandment they thought there
greatest commandment they thought there
greatest commandment they thought there have been really tricky like we have all
have been really tricky like we have all
have been really tricky like we have all these rules and laws you know like skate
these rules and laws you know like skate
these rules and laws you know like skate you to tell us the best one he said
you to tell us the best one he said
you to tell us the best one he said here’s the greatest commandment love the
here’s the greatest commandment love the
here’s the greatest commandment love the Lord God with all your heart out of your
Lord God with all your heart out of your
Lord God with all your heart out of your mind and all your soul and second love
mind and all your soul and second love
mind and all your soul and second love your neighbor as you would love yourself
your neighbor as you would love yourself
your neighbor as you would love yourself and all the law and the prophets hang
and all the law and the prophets hang
and all the law and the prophets hang upon these two Commandments
upon these two Commandments
upon these two Commandments so gays and lesbians and transgender
so gays and lesbians and transgender
so gays and lesbians and transgender people in order to follow Christ’s
people in order to follow Christ’s
people in order to follow Christ’s teaching they need to be accepted into
teaching they need to be accepted into
teaching they need to be accepted into the church welcomed and affirmed and
the church welcomed and affirmed and
the church welcomed and affirmed and allowed to love God and they need to be
allowed to love God and they need to be
allowed to love God and they need to be allowed to love themselves if they’re
allowed to love themselves if they’re
allowed to love themselves if they’re gonna follow the commandment that Christ
gonna follow the commandment that Christ
gonna follow the commandment that Christ said is more important and what do I say
said is more important and what do I say
said is more important and what do I say to those people those Christians who
to those people those Christians who
to those people those Christians who recently drafted the nashville statement
recently drafted the nashville statement
recently drafted the nashville statement this is a statement that basically
this is a statement that basically
this is a statement that basically invalidates transgender gay people it
invalidates transgender gay people it
invalidates transgender gay people it says they’re unholy and beyond
says they’re unholy and beyond
says they’re unholy and beyond redemption what do I say to these people
redemption what do I say to these people
redemption what do I say to these people look very closely at Matthew 25 because
look very closely at Matthew 25 because
look very closely at Matthew 25 because this is where Jesus says who was
this is where Jesus says who was
this is where Jesus says who was traveling the low road makes it pretty
traveling the low road makes it pretty
traveling the low road makes it pretty clear he’s talking to two groups of
clear he’s talking to two groups of
clear he’s talking to two groups of people and he says there’s this one
people and he says there’s this one
people and he says there’s this one group that’s like the least so it’s the
group that’s like the least so it’s the
group that’s like the least so it’s the kind of the the lower members of society
kind of the the lower members of society
kind of the the lower members of society and then this other group or these
and then this other group or these
and then this other group or these self-righteous really assured people and
self-righteous really assured people and
self-righteous really assured people and he shocks these self-righteous people he
he shocks these self-righteous people he
he shocks these self-righteous people he looks at them he says be gone for me you
looks at them he says be gone for me you
looks at them he says be gone for me you who are cursed to the fire that was
who are cursed to the fire that was
who are cursed to the fire that was prepared for the devil and his angels he
prepared for the devil and his angels he
prepared for the devil and his angels he didn’t say this to him because there are
didn’t say this to him because there are
didn’t say this to him because there are old librarians or junkies or draft
old librarians or junkies or draft
old librarians or junkies or draft dodgers or even gay he said you when I
dodgers or even gay he said you when I
dodgers or even gay he said you when I was hungry you didn’t feed me when I was
was hungry you didn’t feed me when I was
was hungry you didn’t feed me when I was thirsty you didn’t give me drink when I
thirsty you didn’t give me drink when I
thirsty you didn’t give me drink when I when I need a shelter you didn’t open
when I need a shelter you didn’t open
when I need a shelter you didn’t open your door to me when I was in prison and
your door to me when I was in prison and
your door to me when I was in prison and sick you didn’t show up you didn’t show
sick you didn’t show up you didn’t show
sick you didn’t show up you didn’t show up to come for me didn’t help me they’re
up to come for me didn’t help me they’re
up to come for me didn’t help me they’re like oh you know Lord why wait when did
like oh you know Lord why wait when did
like oh you know Lord why wait when did we not help you and he said whenever you
we not help you and he said whenever you
we not help you and he said whenever you didn’t help the least of these any of
didn’t help the least of these any of
didn’t help the least of these any of these bless her people over here you did
these bless her people over here you did
these bless her people over here you did not do that for me
so when you think about now as I stand
so when you think about now as I stand before you who are those who need help
before you who are those who need help
before you who are those who need help who are the needy who are the least of
who are the needy who are the least of
who are the needy who are the least of these today transgender people like
these today transgender people like
these today transgender people like myself 60 over 60 about 65 percent of us
myself 60 over 60 about 65 percent of us
myself 60 over 60 about 65 percent of us we report being physically abused being
we report being physically abused being
we report being physically abused being the victims of violence over 40 percent
the victims of violence over 40 percent
the victims of violence over 40 percent of us attempt suicide
of us attempt suicide
of us attempt suicide so transgender people are in desperate
so transgender people are in desperate
so transgender people are in desperate need of love and desperate need of
need of love and desperate need of
need of love and desperate need of support in society and when Christ talks
support in society and when Christ talks
support in society and when Christ talks about that low road you know who’s going
about that low road you know who’s going
about that low road you know who’s going to be traveling it it’s those people who
to be traveling it it’s those people who
to be traveling it it’s those people who mistook finger-pointing for holiness who
mistook finger-pointing for holiness who
mistook finger-pointing for holiness who should have been opening their hearts
should have been opening their hearts
should have been opening their hearts and their doors instead of slamming
and their doors instead of slamming
and their doors instead of slamming doors in people’s faces and when I think
doors in people’s faces and when I think
doors in people’s faces and when I think about the imagery of the cattle trucks
about the imagery of the cattle trucks
about the imagery of the cattle trucks and that Twilight Zone episode and
and that Twilight Zone episode and
and that Twilight Zone episode and people being packed into these cars I
people being packed into these cars I
people being packed into these cars I think about you know that early awful
think about you know that early awful
think about you know that early awful time period in the 20th century when we
time period in the 20th century when we
time period in the 20th century when we took those undesirables and we buried
took those undesirables and we buried
took those undesirables and we buried them in mass graves and we leveled
them in mass graves and we leveled
them in mass graves and we leveled cities with two nuclear bombs and wiped
cities with two nuclear bombs and wiped
cities with two nuclear bombs and wiped out people and we invalidated entire
out people and we invalidated entire
out people and we invalidated entire groups of people because we saw them as
groups of people because we saw them as
groups of people because we saw them as different than ourselves a total
different than ourselves a total
different than ourselves a total catastrophe in loving each other so
catastrophe in loving each other so
catastrophe in loving each other so today I think we got to be careful our
today I think we got to be careful our
today I think we got to be careful our focus on Hell doesn’t get in a way of
focus on Hell doesn’t get in a way of
focus on Hell doesn’t get in a way of preventing the hell that can exist for
preventing the hell that can exist for
preventing the hell that can exist for people right now in this life and for me
people right now in this life and for me
people right now in this life and for me thankfully in this life there’s also joy
thankfully in this life there’s also joy
thankfully in this life there’s also joy so when I go home and I go to school
so when I go home and I go to school
so when I go home and I go to school after work and I pick up my two boys my
after work and I pick up my two boys my
after work and I pick up my two boys my 9 year old and my five year old my five
9 year old and my five year old my five
9 year old and my five year old my five year old comes running up to me
year old comes running up to me
year old comes running up to me routinely
routinely
routinely embraces me in the biggest hug he can
embraces me in the biggest hug he can
embraces me in the biggest hug he can give me Annie says I have missed you
give me Annie says I have missed you
give me Annie says I have missed you daddy
daddy
daddy at night when I tucked my 9 year old
at night when I tucked my 9 year old
at night when I tucked my 9 year old into bed and I read him a story he looks
into bed and I read him a story he looks
into bed and I read him a story he looks at me and he says I love you daddy
at me and he says I love you daddy
at me and he says I love you daddy you’re a good dad and when we pray at
you’re a good dad and when we pray at
you’re a good dad and when we pray at dinner and we pray for our whole family
dinner and we pray for our whole family
dinner and we pray for our whole family we pray for those who aren’t at my table
we pray for those who aren’t at my table
we pray for those who aren’t at my table anymore
anymore
anymore but are still in my heart and my faith
but are still in my heart and my faith
but are still in my heart and my faith is so strong very strong that love is
is so strong very strong that love is
is so strong very strong that love is more than a mere illusion it’s a
more than a mere illusion it’s a
more than a mere illusion it’s a commodity that we need to share with
commodity that we need to share with
commodity that we need to share with each other it’s a necessary commodity to
each other it’s a necessary commodity to
each other it’s a necessary commodity to all of our survival thank you
all of our survival thank you
all of our survival thank you [Applause]
”
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