[Applause] [Music]
I’m John that’s me in the headdress I’ve
I’m John that’s me in the headdress I’ve learned a few headdresses in my life I
learned a few headdresses in my life I
learned a few headdresses in my life I was once a chief executive officer and a
was once a chief executive officer and a
was once a chief executive officer and a founder of a publicly traded company in
founder of a publicly traded company in
founder of a publicly traded company in Detroit Michigan work very hard
Detroit Michigan work very hard
Detroit Michigan work very hard privilege power a lush life livin in
privilege power a lush life livin in
privilege power a lush life livin in posh Grosse Pointe pouf one day gone
posh Grosse Pointe pouf one day gone
posh Grosse Pointe pouf one day gone failure stirring in to avoid seeing the
failure stirring in to avoid seeing the
failure stirring in to avoid seeing the shambles of invincibility looking at a
shambles of invincibility looking at a
shambles of invincibility looking at a punctured self grandiosity what did I do
punctured self grandiosity what did I do
punctured self grandiosity what did I do it’s time to jump on a motorcycle try to
it’s time to jump on a motorcycle try to
it’s time to jump on a motorcycle try to figure things on out it’s a habit that I
figure things on out it’s a habit that I
figure things on out it’s a habit that I have to this day in July of 1999 I had
have to this day in July of 1999 I had
have to this day in July of 1999 I had another headdress removed a failed
another headdress removed a failed
another headdress removed a failed marriage decided to motorcycle across
marriage decided to motorcycle across
marriage decided to motorcycle across the United States and just outside of
the United States and just outside of
the United States and just outside of Crested Butte Colorado I walked into a
Crested Butte Colorado I walked into a
Crested Butte Colorado I walked into a fly fishing resort introduced myself to
fly fishing resort introduced myself to
fly fishing resort introduced myself to a woman she said I’m feeling a Tanner
a woman she said I’m feeling a Tanner
a woman she said I’m feeling a Tanner from Papua New Guinea go Papa what if
from Papua New Guinea go Papa what if
from Papua New Guinea go Papa what if you want to go for a motorcycle ride
you want to go for a motorcycle ride
you want to go for a motorcycle ride only if it’s a Harley of course I had a
only if it’s a Harley of course I had a
only if it’s a Harley of course I had a Harley in 18 years later now my wife
Harley in 18 years later now my wife
Harley in 18 years later now my wife it’s been one extreme ride what I want
it’s been one extreme ride what I want
it’s been one extreme ride what I want to share with you over the next few
to share with you over the next few
to share with you over the next few minutes is a segment of my journey into
minutes is a segment of my journey into
minutes is a segment of my journey into vulnerability and I’m going to take four
vulnerability and I’m going to take four
vulnerability and I’m going to take four extreme examples and remote Papua New
extreme examples and remote Papua New
extreme examples and remote Papua New Guinea and discuss vulnerability at its
Guinea and discuss vulnerability at its
Guinea and discuss vulnerability at its extreme where you may get wounded and
extreme where you may get wounded and
extreme where you may get wounded and then you you weigh out whether it’s
then you you weigh out whether it’s
then you you weigh out whether it’s worth the risk with on certain rewards
worth the risk with on certain rewards
worth the risk with on certain rewards now Papua New Guinea is located just
now Papua New Guinea is located just
now Papua New Guinea is located just north of Australia
north of Australia
north of Australia besides the California cannibalism
besides the California cannibalism
besides the California cannibalism the
the
the Denarius east in 1963 our home was built
Denarius east in 1963 our home was built
Denarius east in 1963 our home was built over a river surrounded by three
over a river surrounded by three
over a river surrounded by three mountain fronts no electricity we had no
mountain fronts no electricity we had no
mountain fronts no electricity we had no satellite phone no running water and
satellite phone no running water and
satellite phone no running water and that we were out there but surrounded
that we were out there but surrounded
that we were out there but surrounded what Jurassic valleys filled with
what Jurassic valleys filled with
what Jurassic valleys filled with begonias impatience orchids nine-inch
begonias impatience orchids nine-inch
begonias impatience orchids nine-inch winged butterflies believe it or not and
winged butterflies believe it or not and
winged butterflies believe it or not and of course the bird of paradise and every
of course the bird of paradise and every
of course the bird of paradise and every single evening
single evening
single evening Fiona and I would sit on that screen
Fiona and I would sit on that screen
Fiona and I would sit on that screen porch and hundreds of fireflies would
porch and hundreds of fireflies would
porch and hundreds of fireflies would come out and congregate and not be
come out and congregate and not be
come out and congregate and not be sippin out of a tin cup with maybe
sippin out of a tin cup with maybe
sippin out of a tin cup with maybe whiskey in it she’d be sipping a glass
whiskey in it she’d be sipping a glass
whiskey in it she’d be sipping a glass of wine and it’s a beautiful setting and
of wine and it’s a beautiful setting and
of wine and it’s a beautiful setting and I want you to come in just for the next
I want you to come in just for the next
I want you to come in just for the next few minutes and enjoy these tales from
few minutes and enjoy these tales from
few minutes and enjoy these tales from Papua New Guinea with me I want to
Papua New Guinea with me I want to
Papua New Guinea with me I want to introduce chief Stafford to you first
Fiona and I were going in and out of the
Fiona and I were going in and out of the outer islands of Papua New Guinea up
outer islands of Papua New Guinea up
outer islands of Papua New Guinea up until mid 2005 then we decided it was
until mid 2005 then we decided it was
until mid 2005 then we decided it was time to go into the remote interior of
time to go into the remote interior of
time to go into the remote interior of Papua New Guinea and we wanted to go up
Papua New Guinea and we wanted to go up
Papua New Guinea and we wanted to go up to the mana godless play a toll to view
to the mana godless play a toll to view
to the mana godless play a toll to view the farmers coffee farmers burning their
the farmers coffee farmers burning their
the farmers coffee farmers burning their coffee beans and protests against
coffee beans and protests against
coffee beans and protests against middlemen cheaters and politicians that
middlemen cheaters and politicians that
middlemen cheaters and politicians that were put in the benefits in their
were put in the benefits in their
were put in the benefits in their pockets and not the farmers chief
pockets and not the farmers chief
pockets and not the farmers chief Stafford wanted to meet me was 50 men in
Stafford wanted to meet me was 50 men in
Stafford wanted to meet me was 50 men in a pavilion sat down the first question
a pavilion sat down the first question
a pavilion sat down the first question he asked me why are you here one of the
he asked me why are you here one of the
he asked me why are you here one of the first times in my life I responded I do
first times in my life I responded I do
first times in my life I responded I do knew not why I don’t know why I’m here
knew not why I don’t know why I’m here
knew not why I don’t know why I’m here but I do know that I want to be here and
but I do know that I want to be here and
but I do know that I want to be here and that split second the the lesson of
that split second the the lesson of
that split second the the lesson of humility struck me in a very distinct
humility struck me in a very distinct
humility struck me in a very distinct way that I did not try to overpower over
way that I did not try to overpower over
way that I did not try to overpower over credential overstate myself but just
credential overstate myself but just
credential overstate myself but just move into a place to know that I did not
move into a place to know that I did not
move into a place to know that I did not have to know and that was a big act of
have to know and that was a big act of
have to know and that was a big act of honor
honor
honor for me I think within that split-second
for me I think within that split-second
for me I think within that split-second my own egocentricity somewhere just
my own egocentricity somewhere just
my own egocentricity somewhere just shrank just a little and this humility
shrank just a little and this humility
shrank just a little and this humility up the little and it was enough for a
up the little and it was enough for a
up the little and it was enough for a touching point with this wiry old chief
touching point with this wiry old chief
touching point with this wiry old chief where we struck a deal a fair deal where
where we struck a deal a fair deal where
where we struck a deal a fair deal where he convinced me to come back from
he convinced me to come back from
he convinced me to come back from America with my business skills and he
America with my business skills and he
America with my business skills and he would supply coffee beans to our company
would supply coffee beans to our company
would supply coffee beans to our company to build a coffee company at the end of
to build a coffee company at the end of
to build a coffee company at the end of that meeting he came on up and he shook
that meeting he came on up and he shook
that meeting he came on up and he shook my hand and called me tall but a big
my hand and called me tall but a big
my hand and called me tall but a big white man and we became respectful
white man and we became respectful
white man and we became respectful friends now I’d like you to join me in
friends now I’d like you to join me in
friends now I’d like you to join me in the wedding and table awanee
the wedding and table awanee
the wedding and table awanee and these two men right here were there
and these two men right here were there
and these two men right here were there to POLST to make sure that I was not
to POLST to make sure that I was not
to POLST to make sure that I was not going to run away from my own wedding
going to run away from my own wedding
going to run away from my own wedding and in fact it was a thousand years
and in fact it was a thousand years
and in fact it was a thousand years ceremony and you couldn’t blame me after
ceremony and you couldn’t blame me after
ceremony and you couldn’t blame me after two marriages that I wanted to run away
two marriages that I wanted to run away
two marriages that I wanted to run away that particular morning what they did is
that particular morning what they did is
that particular morning what they did is they took me down to a river and this is
they took me down to a river and this is
they took me down to a river and this is going back a thousand years right now in
going back a thousand years right now in
going back a thousand years right now in terms of a ceremony and they started a
terms of a ceremony and they started a
terms of a ceremony and they started a scrub and wash and feather and bead me I
scrub and wash and feather and bead me I
scrub and wash and feather and bead me I couldn’t stop laughs and they’re
couldn’t stop laughs and they’re
couldn’t stop laughs and they’re laughing at me
laughing at me
laughing at me and it continued for about an hour and a
and it continued for about an hour and a
and it continued for about an hour and a half when that was done it was time to
half when that was done it was time to
half when that was done it was time to go down into the village of Taba Lani
go down into the village of Taba Lani
go down into the village of Taba Lani fiona was brought out of a hut just look
fiona was brought out of a hut just look
fiona was brought out of a hut just look gorgeous the three pigs are right there
gorgeous the three pigs are right there
gorgeous the three pigs are right there and within a split second I traded the
and within a split second I traded the
and within a split second I traded the the three pigs for my wife and were
the three pigs for my wife and were
the three pigs for my wife and were husband and wife right there
husband and wife right there
husband and wife right there that simple that quick I always thought
that simple that quick I always thought
that simple that quick I always thought that was a bargain I’m not sure to this
that was a bargain I’m not sure to this
that was a bargain I’m not sure to this day that Fiona feels the same way but in
day that Fiona feels the same way but in
day that Fiona feels the same way but in a split second father Daniel in Anakin
a split second father Daniel in Anakin
a split second father Daniel in Anakin robes comes on out under a tin roof in
robes comes on out under a tin roof in
robes comes on out under a tin roof in States ladies and gentlemen it was not
States ladies and gentlemen it was not
States ladies and gentlemen it was not long ago that we would not be marrying
long ago that we would not be marrying
long ago that we would not be marrying Johnny Fiona we would be eating them
Johnny Fiona we would be eating them
Johnny Fiona we would be eating them that’s a fact
[Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
now that’s the village idiot big-time
now that’s the village idiot big-time CEO right there the vulnerability the
CEO right there the vulnerability the
CEO right there the vulnerability the sand foolishness surprise me with the in
sand foolishness surprise me with the in
sand foolishness surprise me with the in that Mele right there a control freak
that Mele right there a control freak
that Mele right there a control freak was out of control if i permitted myself
was out of control if i permitted myself
was out of control if i permitted myself to be out of control i moved into the
to be out of control i moved into the
to be out of control i moved into the present and connected one human being to
present and connected one human being to
present and connected one human being to another one emotion to another
another one emotion to another
another one emotion to another foolishness to foolishness and it
foolishness to foolishness and it
foolishness to foolishness and it permitted me to make contact human
permitted me to make contact human
permitted me to make contact human contact my big lesson right here is that
contact my big lesson right here is that
contact my big lesson right here is that emotional empathy does break down
emotional empathy does break down
emotional empathy does break down barriers and as a result myself trusts
barriers and as a result myself trusts
barriers and as a result myself trusts increased now I want to talk to you
increased now I want to talk to you
increased now I want to talk to you about the the pig at Kiara a messenger
about the the pig at Kiara a messenger
about the the pig at Kiara a messenger was sent on over to my house to inform
was sent on over to my house to inform
was sent on over to my house to inform me that I was in to be honored with the
me that I was in to be honored with the
me that I was in to be honored with the pig and I’d be the first white person
pig and I’d be the first white person
pig and I’d be the first white person ever to step in this village pig is a
ever to step in this village pig is a
ever to step in this village pig is a pretty big deal two hundred and fifty US
pretty big deal two hundred and fifty US
pretty big deal two hundred and fifty US dollars that’s about a year’s worth of
dollars that’s about a year’s worth of
dollars that’s about a year’s worth of income to one of those villagers but
income to one of those villagers but
income to one of those villagers but more than that we were occurred four to
more than that we were occurred four to
more than that we were occurred four to five years of drive in this coffee
five years of drive in this coffee
five years of drive in this coffee certified organic rainforest alliance
certified organic rainforest alliance
certified organic rainforest alliance into the world market
into the world market
into the world market Nestle’s buying up Whole Foods buying it
Nestle’s buying up Whole Foods buying it
Nestle’s buying up Whole Foods buying it but the money was in their pockets and
but the money was in their pockets and
but the money was in their pockets and they were buying rice flour paying for
they were buying rice flour paying for
they were buying rice flour paying for school fees and putting roofing iron on
school fees and putting roofing iron on
school fees and putting roofing iron on the tops of their home to keep out the
the tops of their home to keep out the
the tops of their home to keep out the rain oh hey is it true James first white
rain oh hey is it true James first white
rain oh hey is it true James first white people in this village I come here as a
people in this village I come here as a
people in this village I come here as a friend
friend
friend it’s that thing open
yes a beautiful beautiful word on the
yes a beautiful beautiful word on the way over there that day I bought soiled
way over there that day I bought soiled
way over there that day I bought soiled on my pants on three different occasions
on my pants on three different occasions
on my pants on three different occasions three men with machetes step right
three men with machetes step right
three men with machetes step right outside of the rain forest and so white
outside of the rain forest and so white
outside of the rain forest and so white man you go back we move forward because
man you go back we move forward because
man you go back we move forward because we had more machetes than they did soon
we had more machetes than they did soon
we had more machetes than they did soon after that young woman would would jump
after that young woman would would jump
after that young woman would would jump out of the rain forest to grab Fiona’s
out of the rain forest to grab Fiona’s
out of the rain forest to grab Fiona’s hair to touch blonde hair they’ve never
hair to touch blonde hair they’ve never
hair to touch blonde hair they’ve never seen blonde here before or look at her
seen blonde here before or look at her
seen blonde here before or look at her blue eyes and pale skin I had the urge
blue eyes and pale skin I had the urge
blue eyes and pale skin I had the urge right there to saw on my pants a couple
right there to saw on my pants a couple
right there to saw on my pants a couple times right after that men jumped out
times right after that men jumped out
times right after that men jumped out and started throw Spears at my feet
and started throw Spears at my feet
and started throw Spears at my feet Fiona of course her posture throughout
Fiona of course her posture throughout
Fiona of course her posture throughout that afternoon darling the closer the
that afternoon darling the closer the
that afternoon darling the closer the Spears the more you’re welcome she was
Spears the more you’re welcome she was
Spears the more you’re welcome she was fearless we finally moved into the
fearless we finally moved into the
fearless we finally moved into the village itself I’m surrounded by ancient
village itself I’m surrounded by ancient
village itself I’m surrounded by ancient faces of the clan chiefs they present me
faces of the clan chiefs they present me
faces of the clan chiefs they present me with the pig and we had a feast the
with the pig and we had a feast the
with the pig and we had a feast the vulnerability the sand for me was a deep
vulnerability the sand for me was a deep
vulnerability the sand for me was a deep one right here and it had to do with
one right here and it had to do with
one right here and it had to do with worthiness now on a side comment you you
worthiness now on a side comment you you
worthiness now on a side comment you you can soil your pants or have the feeling
can soil your pants or have the feeling
can soil your pants or have the feeling of doing that and I believed that that
of doing that and I believed that that
of doing that and I believed that that was not really a sign of weakness I
was not really a sign of weakness I
was not really a sign of weakness I believe it was an act of vulnerability
believe it was an act of vulnerability
believe it was an act of vulnerability and most CEOs of a coach believe that as
and most CEOs of a coach believe that as
and most CEOs of a coach believe that as well but more important was a gift that
well but more important was a gift that
well but more important was a gift that was given to me for a conditioned mind
was given to me for a conditioned mind
was given to me for a conditioned mind for me to be that open to go that fire
for me to be that open to go that fire
for me to be that open to go that fire in my life to have that pig as a reward
in my life to have that pig as a reward
in my life to have that pig as a reward worthiness and legitimacy right into my
worthiness and legitimacy right into my
worthiness and legitimacy right into my heart now that’s a headdress that’s
heart now that’s a headdress that’s
heart now that’s a headdress that’s there forever never go away now I like
there forever never go away now I like
there forever never go away now I like to share with you five years ago today
to share with you five years ago today
to share with you five years ago today August 16 2012 I’m in the city of pop
August 16 2012 I’m in the city of pop
August 16 2012 I’m in the city of pop and data and things aren’t going well
and data and things aren’t going well
and data and things aren’t going well there was a fear that was percolating
there was a fear that was percolating
there was a fear that was percolating within me I wasn’t Spears wasn’t
within me I wasn’t Spears wasn’t
within me I wasn’t Spears wasn’t machetes I couldn’t put my arms around
machetes I couldn’t put my arms around
machetes I couldn’t put my arms around it
it
it but I felt threatened and so did Fiona
but I felt threatened and so did Fiona
but I felt threatened and so did Fiona we pieced together that our own
we pieced together that our own
we pieced together that our own vulnerability was actually creating
vulnerability was actually creating
vulnerability was actually creating jealousy in vengeance from the same
jealousy in vengeance from the same
jealousy in vengeance from the same middleman and politicians we encroached
middleman and politicians we encroached
middleman and politicians we encroached on their power the first time in seven
on their power the first time in seven
on their power the first time in seven years I permitted a firearm
years I permitted a firearm
years I permitted a firearm we hired out two policemen and an m16 to
we hired out two policemen and an m16 to
we hired out two policemen and an m16 to follow us in a vehicle right outside of
follow us in a vehicle right outside of
follow us in a vehicle right outside of pop and dad up five men launched on out
pop and dad up five men launched on out
pop and dad up five men launched on out with what we thought were Spurs were m1
with what we thought were Spurs were m1
with what we thought were Spurs were m1 rifles from World War two and started to
rifles from World War two and started to
rifles from World War two and started to fire if you wanna screech that bullet
fire if you wanna screech that bullet
fire if you wanna screech that bullet went right behind us but both the fuel
went right behind us but both the fuel
went right behind us but both the fuel drums it’s over and we looked at one
drums it’s over and we looked at one
drums it’s over and we looked at one another the other vehicle came on up
another the other vehicle came on up
another the other vehicle came on up policemen with an m16 shot one of the
policemen with an m16 shot one of the
policemen with an m16 shot one of the assassins they dragged his body in the
assassins they dragged his body in the
assassins they dragged his body in the kunai grass within eight weeks I’m back
kunai grass within eight weeks I’m back
kunai grass within eight weeks I’m back in Grosse Pointe Michigan I’m looking at
in Grosse Pointe Michigan I’m looking at
in Grosse Pointe Michigan I’m looking at a wall not to see Fiona nor her
a wall not to see Fiona nor her
a wall not to see Fiona nor her daughters for thirteen months the
daughters for thirteen months the
daughters for thirteen months the company a total boss and I went into a
company a total boss and I went into a
company a total boss and I went into a pit and abyss crowd my way out of it put
pit and abyss crowd my way out of it put
pit and abyss crowd my way out of it put some meaning into a book rolled a book
some meaning into a book rolled a book
some meaning into a book rolled a book it was it was effective therapy for me
it was it was effective therapy for me
it was it was effective therapy for me the fear the lesson if you’re right on
the fear the lesson if you’re right on
the fear the lesson if you’re right on here my arms are on that one you know
here my arms are on that one you know
here my arms are on that one you know it’s it’s not as clear as the other
it’s it’s not as clear as the other
it’s it’s not as clear as the other lessons it’s a powerful conditioner but
lessons it’s a powerful conditioner but
lessons it’s a powerful conditioner but I had one of two decisions to make one
I had one of two decisions to make one
I had one of two decisions to make one choice was to become invulnerable and to
choice was to become invulnerable and to
choice was to become invulnerable and to close myself down and become mistrustful
close myself down and become mistrustful
close myself down and become mistrustful or to remain vulnerable and pry myself
or to remain vulnerable and pry myself
or to remain vulnerable and pry myself open to get on that highway and move
open to get on that highway and move
open to get on that highway and move forward and I chose the second one and I
forward and I chose the second one and I
forward and I chose the second one and I believe my heart today is better off
believe my heart today is better off
believe my heart today is better off forward the reflections on vulnerability
forward the reflections on vulnerability
forward the reflections on vulnerability it takes a lot of courage or more
it takes a lot of courage or more
it takes a lot of courage or more unlikely you will be wounded it’s a wolf
unlikely you will be wounded it’s a wolf
unlikely you will be wounded it’s a wolf oil act I believe it’s important to
oil act I believe it’s important to
oil act I believe it’s important to permit yourself to use your
permit yourself to use your
permit yourself to use your vulnerability attempts as the catalyst
vulnerability attempts as the catalyst
vulnerability attempts as the catalyst for future growth
for future growth
for future growth include them don’t exclude them is it
include them don’t exclude them is it
include them don’t exclude them is it worth it you’re going to have to find
worth it you’re going to have to find
worth it you’re going to have to find that out for me it was but I do believe
that out for me it was but I do believe
that out for me it was but I do believe in the attempt
in the attempt
in the attempt mother earth earth kind humankind will
mother earth earth kind humankind will
mother earth earth kind humankind will be enriched I think all of us would be
be enriched I think all of us would be
be enriched I think all of us would be better off forward and thank you for
better off forward and thank you for
better off forward and thank you for joining me and this campfire and
joining me and this campfire and
joining me and this campfire and listening with vulnerability thank you
listening with vulnerability thank you
listening with vulnerability thank you very much
very much
very much [Applause]
”
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