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Choices of a refugee | Firas Al Khoury | TEDxSittardGeleen


I asked for a stool because i’m going to

I asked for a stool because i’m going to tell a story and it’s all awkward to

tell a story and it’s all awkward to

tell a story and it’s all awkward to stand up and tell a story never my

stand up and tell a story never my

stand up and tell a story never my mother never did that she never stood up

mother never did that she never stood up

mother never did that she never stood up and tells me a story before I went to

and tells me a story before I went to

and tells me a story before I went to sleep was over so i thought i was to my

sleep was over so i thought i was to my

sleep was over so i thought i was to my teacher the irony about my story starts

teacher the irony about my story starts

teacher the irony about my story starts about my with my name my name is Phyllis

about my with my name my name is Phyllis

about my with my name my name is Phyllis algerie it’s in Arabic means the future

algerie it’s in Arabic means the future

algerie it’s in Arabic means the future predicting priest if you would have math

predicting priest if you would have math

predicting priest if you would have math me five years ago about my future I

me five years ago about my future I

me five years ago about my future I wouldn’t have it in my wildest dream

wouldn’t have it in my wildest dream

wouldn’t have it in my wildest dream that will be sitting on the red red dots

that will be sitting on the red red dots

that will be sitting on the red red dots on a TEDx of Ted stage talking about my

on a TEDx of Ted stage talking about my

on a TEDx of Ted stage talking about my life story I had a complete other

life story I had a complete other

life story I had a complete other picture of myself the other irony is

picture of myself the other irony is

picture of myself the other irony is actually the title of my speech choices

actually the title of my speech choices

actually the title of my speech choices of a refugee do you think that any

of a refugee do you think that any

of a refugee do you think that any refugee has a choice I didn’t have a

refugee has a choice I didn’t have a

refugee has a choice I didn’t have a choice I am here because I didn’t have a

choice I am here because I didn’t have a

choice I am here because I didn’t have a choice i was born in Iraq lived there

choice i was born in Iraq lived there

choice i was born in Iraq lived there till nine 26 I was actually born to a

till nine 26 I was actually born to a

till nine 26 I was actually born to a middle class family I was one of those

middle class family I was one of those

middle class family I was one of those very very annoying children that I will

very very annoying children that I will

very very annoying children that I will just stop you and say sir I want to be a

just stop you and say sir I want to be a

just stop you and say sir I want to be a doctor when I would grow up so and I

doctor when I would grow up so and I

doctor when I would grow up so and I worked hard to do that I manage that I

worked hard to do that I manage that I

worked hard to do that I manage that I my 25th years I was great just graduate

my 25th years I was great just graduate

my 25th years I was great just graduate fresh doctor went to work as as

fresh doctor went to work as as

fresh doctor went to work as as emergency doctorate in one of the middle

emergency doctorate in one of the middle

emergency doctorate in one of the middle middle small middle big hospitals in

middle small middle big hospitals in

middle small middle big hospitals in Baghdad and I was very happy at that I

Baghdad and I was very happy at that I

Baghdad and I was very happy at that I did it and I thought I did it good until

did it and I thought I did it good until

did it and I thought I did it good until one day it was one of them won one of my

one day it was one of them won one of my

one day it was one of them won one of my late shift and then then they become a

late shift and then then they become a

late shift and then then they become a huge amount of people a very big family

huge amount of people a very big family

huge amount of people a very big family they are carrying this tale cold

they are carrying this tale cold

they are carrying this tale cold where you can call dead person and he

where you can call dead person and he

where you can call dead person and he they just put it in front put him in

they just put it in front put him in

they just put it in front put him in front of of on front on my desk and they

front of of on front on my desk and they

front of of on front on my desk and they asked me to reanimate them just bring

asked me to reanimate them just bring

asked me to reanimate them just bring him back to life like I was like let me

him back to life like I was like let me

him back to life like I was like let me just check if he if that’s even possible

just check if he if that’s even possible

just check if he if that’s even possible so I did my what you took all in Dutch

so I did my what you took all in Dutch

so I did my what you took all in Dutch muscala so you listen to the heart for a

muscala so you listen to the heart for a

muscala so you listen to the heart for a minute and if there is no beat heart

minute and if there is no beat heart

minute and if there is no beat heart beat you say he’s dead I’m not going to

beat you say he’s dead I’m not going to

beat you say he’s dead I’m not going to do anything especially because I don’t

do anything especially because I don’t

do anything especially because I don’t know what happened like how long is he

know what happened like how long is he

know what happened like how long is he like that I but they didn’t agree they

like that I but they didn’t agree they

like that I but they didn’t agree they insisted that I have to reanimate him

insisted that I have to reanimate him

insisted that I have to reanimate him they insisted I have to bring him back

they insisted I have to bring him back

they insisted I have to bring him back to life I tried to explain to them that

to life I tried to explain to them that

to life I tried to explain to them that that won’t help that we have to at least

that won’t help that we have to at least

that won’t help that we have to at least respect to death he is that we have to

respect to death he is that we have to

respect to death he is that we have to respect the dead that’s like a worldwide

respect the dead that’s like a worldwide

respect the dead that’s like a worldwide principle that we all believe in but

principle that we all believe in but

principle that we all believe in but they didn’t believe in they they started

they didn’t believe in they they started

they didn’t believe in they they started to shout at me and one of them started

to shout at me and one of them started

to shout at me and one of them started to hit me and the other saturday at me

to hit me and the other saturday at me

to hit me and the other saturday at me and then they had the the FISC the fists

and then they had the the FISC the fists

and then they had the the FISC the fists kept coming the the cakes kept coming

kept coming the the cakes kept coming

kept coming the the cakes kept coming one of them used this pistol to kick

one of them used this pistol to kick

one of them used this pistol to kick wonderly I managed to flee the hospital

wonderly I managed to flee the hospital

wonderly I managed to flee the hospital I went to to the police station to

I went to to the police station to

I went to to the police station to police station and I asked them I told

police station and I asked them I told

police station and I asked them I told my story and the policemen behind the

my story and the policemen behind the

my story and the policemen behind the death said so you are that doctor who

death said so you are that doctor who

death said so you are that doctor who killed mr. X i we don’t want to keep

killed mr. X i we don’t want to keep

killed mr. X i we don’t want to keep bringing names so that moment was for me

bringing names so that moment was for me

bringing names so that moment was for me okay i’m not going to go back home today

okay i’m not going to go back home today

okay i’m not going to go back home today I’m gonna go to another friends and

I’m gonna go to another friends and

I’m gonna go to another friends and other friends to another friends and to

other friends to another friends and to

other friends to another friends and to another friends and to another friends

another friends and to another friends

another friends and to another friends this kept I kept doing this for a month

this kept I kept doing this for a month

this kept I kept doing this for a month and so once at one day I thought this is

and so once at one day I thought this is

and so once at one day I thought this is won’t happen my life isn’t safe I’m not

won’t happen my life isn’t safe I’m not

won’t happen my life isn’t safe I’m not Iraq is not safe for me I have to do

Iraq is not safe for me I have to do

Iraq is not safe for me I have to do something because the friends i am

something because the friends i am

something because the friends i am staying at are in safe and as well so i

staying at are in safe and as well so i

staying at are in safe and as well so i found this man he he managed to bring me

found this man he he managed to bring me

found this man he he managed to bring me to the netherlands so after a very long

to the netherlands so after a very long

to the netherlands so after a very long road trip Here I am at the Netherlands

road trip Here I am at the Netherlands

road trip Here I am at the Netherlands and my very own first day at the

and my very own first day at the

and my very own first day at the netherlands i met this huge big security

netherlands i met this huge big security

netherlands i met this huge big security guard who found my stethoscope in my

guard who found my stethoscope in my

guard who found my stethoscope in my backpack when he had to search it

backpack when he had to search it

backpack when he had to search it and he asked me he was very enthusiastic

and he asked me he was very enthusiastic

and he asked me he was very enthusiastic you’re a doctor and I was i just spent

you’re a doctor and I was i just spent

you’re a doctor and I was i just spent 10 days in the stomach of a track not

10 days in the stomach of a track not

10 days in the stomach of a track not really feeling like a doctor I said I

really feeling like a doctor I said I

really feeling like a doctor I said I was a doctor and he looked at me very

was a doctor and he looked at me very

was a doctor and he looked at me very surprised and he said once a doctor is

surprised and he said once a doctor is

surprised and he said once a doctor is always a doctor and that I still still

always a doctor and that I still still

always a doctor and that I still still have this is goose bump when I say it

have this is goose bump when I say it

have this is goose bump when I say it but it’s that moment the moment he said

but it’s that moment the moment he said

but it’s that moment the moment he said that I got the I got this yes he’s right

that I got the I got this yes he’s right

that I got the I got this yes he’s right I’m still a doctor I have the knowledge

I’m still a doctor I have the knowledge

I’m still a doctor I have the knowledge i have the information all i have to do

i have the information all i have to do

i have the information all i have to do is translate the knowledge I have into

is translate the knowledge I have into

is translate the knowledge I have into Dutch it shouldn’t be difficult so I

Dutch it shouldn’t be difficult so I

Dutch it shouldn’t be difficult so I went to the library right away found

went to the library right away found

went to the library right away found this book Dutch for dummies I thought

this book Dutch for dummies I thought

this book Dutch for dummies I thought yes this is my book this is my book done

yes this is my book this is my book done

yes this is my book this is my book done for dummies so I started with Dutch the

for dummies so I started with Dutch the

for dummies so I started with Dutch the dummies but I didn’t stop with Dutch for

dummies but I didn’t stop with Dutch for

dummies but I didn’t stop with Dutch for dummies because I was nothing else was

dummies because I was nothing else was

dummies because I was nothing else was important have this goal ahead of me had

important have this goal ahead of me had

important have this goal ahead of me had this goal I had to speak Dutch I had to

this goal I had to speak Dutch I had to

this goal I had to speak Dutch I had to become a doctor again I have to find

become a doctor again I have to find

become a doctor again I have to find myself back well in this in this period

myself back well in this in this period

myself back well in this in this period like after I didn’t occur even when I

like after I didn’t occur even when I

like after I didn’t occur even when I was at the ing the Immigration Services

was at the ing the Immigration Services

was at the ing the Immigration Services I was i SAT there and asking them what

I was i SAT there and asking them what

I was i SAT there and asking them what does this mean me what does this word

does this mean me what does this word

does this mean me what does this word mean what does that word mean how do i

mean what does that word mean how do i

mean what does that word mean how do i pronounce this how depressed so I didn’t

pronounce this how depressed so I didn’t

pronounce this how depressed so I didn’t pay any attention to the whole fact I

pay any attention to the whole fact I

pay any attention to the whole fact I just fleet Iraq that know how here in

just fleet Iraq that know how here in

just fleet Iraq that know how here in the Netherlands knowing no one knowing

the Netherlands knowing no one knowing

the Netherlands knowing no one knowing nothing three days after after a law of

nothing three days after after a law of

nothing three days after after a law of course is a low of exams L all failing a

course is a low of exams L all failing a

course is a low of exams L all failing a la fox is a lot of successes here i am

la fox is a lot of successes here i am

la fox is a lot of successes here i am applying for a job as in an academic

applying for a job as in an academic

applying for a job as in an academic hospital of mass effect and i was up

hospital of mass effect and i was up

hospital of mass effect and i was up hired i am now a medical doctor in in my

hired i am now a medical doctor in in my

hired i am now a medical doctor in in my academic hospital of mass effect as a

academic hospital of mass effect as a

academic hospital of mass effect as a cardiothoracic surgeon not a surgeon

cardiothoracic surgeon not a surgeon

cardiothoracic surgeon not a surgeon assistant surgery so i was very happy I

assistant surgery so i was very happy I

assistant surgery so i was very happy I was like yes this is it I imagine that

was like yes this is it I imagine that

was like yes this is it I imagine that would be I would be happy because I’m

would be I would be happy because I’m

would be I would be happy because I’m now my goal but then I was on the top of

now my goal but then I was on the top of

now my goal but then I was on the top of the hill I reach my goal I was the but

the hill I reach my goal I was the but

the hill I reach my goal I was the but then one question kept me awake at night

then one question kept me awake at night

then one question kept me awake at night and now what but who am I now I am I

and now what but who am I now I am I

and now what but who am I now I am I reach my goal but how I came here

reach my goal but how I came here

reach my goal but how I came here where’s home now Iraq isn’t home anymore

where’s home now Iraq isn’t home anymore

where’s home now Iraq isn’t home anymore because I became too touchy to be Iraqi

because I became too touchy to be Iraqi

because I became too touchy to be Iraqi and I’m not a lucky anymore because I am

and I’m not a lucky anymore because I am

and I’m not a lucky anymore because I am too touchy yeah other way yeah you got

too touchy yeah other way yeah you got

too touchy yeah other way yeah you got idea so I heard once once someone saying

idea so I heard once once someone saying

idea so I heard once once someone saying that the journey is as important as a

that the journey is as important as a

that the journey is as important as a destination so I thought to myself I am

destination so I thought to myself I am

destination so I thought to myself I am at my destination but what was my

at my destination but what was my

at my destination but what was my journey I have no idea all i think about

journey I have no idea all i think about

journey I have no idea all i think about was me looking at this goal I want to

was me looking at this goal I want to

was me looking at this goal I want to reach that goal so I went I went back I

reach that goal so I went I went back I

reach that goal so I went I went back I did I planned this rod rode a bike trip

did I planned this rod rode a bike trip

did I planned this rod rode a bike trip from mass text where I work live work as

from mass text where I work live work as

from mass text where I work live work as a doctor too groaning what I came as a

a doctor too groaning what I came as a

a doctor too groaning what I came as a refugee along this along the way I would

refugee along this along the way I would

refugee along this along the way I would pass by all the Asylum centers where I

pass by all the Asylum centers where I

pass by all the Asylum centers where I stayed and gag as a doctor I sorry as a

stayed and gag as a doctor I sorry as a

stayed and gag as a doctor I sorry as a refugee so my first step was velo the

refugee so my first step was velo the

refugee so my first step was velo the first men the first time I came a value

first men the first time I came a value

first men the first time I came a value i was very happy like hundred kilometres

i was very happy like hundred kilometres

i was very happy like hundred kilometres off behind me at cycling so there was

off behind me at cycling so there was

off behind me at cycling so there was very funny yeah but I did it so I was

very funny yeah but I did it so I was

very funny yeah but I did it so I was very happy but then I saw a sign like

very happy but then I saw a sign like

very happy but then I saw a sign like welcome and I was extremely happy and

welcome and I was extremely happy and

welcome and I was extremely happy and then I went to med to the room where I

then I went to med to the room where I

then I went to med to the room where I stayed there as a refugee and the room I

stayed there as a refugee and the room I

stayed there as a refugee and the room I ones pictured ones pictured like like

ones pictured ones pictured like like

ones pictured ones pictured like like this is this is it’s a view it’s a cozy

this is this is it’s a view it’s a cozy

this is this is it’s a view it’s a cozy it’s it’s a nice it’s warm it’s safe it

it’s it’s a nice it’s warm it’s safe it

it’s it’s a nice it’s warm it’s safe it wasn’t cozy it wasn’t safe it wasn’t

wasn’t cozy it wasn’t safe it wasn’t

wasn’t cozy it wasn’t safe it wasn’t warm it was cold I felt I felt

warm it was cold I felt I felt

warm it was cold I felt I felt everything was against me but then I

everything was against me but then I

everything was against me but then I realized I feel that because it’s I am

realized I feel that because it’s I am

realized I feel that because it’s I am NOT comparing the room to the stomach of

NOT comparing the room to the stomach of

NOT comparing the room to the stomach of a truck anymore i’m comparing to what i

a truck anymore i’m comparing to what i

a truck anymore i’m comparing to what i find my amazing house in maastricht i am

find my amazing house in maastricht i am

find my amazing house in maastricht i am not that refugee anymore and this roller

not that refugee anymore and this roller

not that refugee anymore and this roller coaster of emotions repeated itself in

coaster of emotions repeated itself in

coaster of emotions repeated itself in wageningen and Arnhem and then in

wageningen and Arnhem and then in

wageningen and Arnhem and then in terrible I got this amazing chance to

terrible I got this amazing chance to

terrible I got this amazing chance to meet Mitchell that security guard when I

meet Mitchell that security guard when I

meet Mitchell that security guard when I met him the most important the most

met him the most important the most

met him the most important the most beautiful part about meaning that he

beautiful part about meaning that he

beautiful part about meaning that he didn’t know who I am he have no clue he

didn’t know who I am he have no clue he

didn’t know who I am he have no clue he just for him it was just a fact you’re a

just for him it was just a fact you’re a

just for him it was just a fact you’re a doctor there will always be a doctor so

doctor there will always be a doctor so

doctor there will always be a doctor so he didn’t know me and the second one

he didn’t know me and the second one

he didn’t know me and the second one second beautiful part of our about our

second beautiful part of our about our

second beautiful part of our about our meeting was that Mitchell

meeting was that Mitchell

meeting was that Mitchell wasn’t that big wasn’t that huge guy he

wasn’t that big wasn’t that huge guy he

wasn’t that big wasn’t that huge guy he was just my size he was about I he was

was just my size he was about I he was

was just my size he was about I he was about my size I was like I told him like

about my size I was like I told him like

about my size I was like I told him like I always pictured you even when I told

I always pictured you even when I told

I always pictured you even when I told people about about you I was like big

people about about you I was like big

people about about you I was like big huge typical dutch person but he wasn’t

huge typical dutch person but he wasn’t

huge typical dutch person but he wasn’t he was my size but that well then I

he was my size but that well then I

he was my size but that well then I realized that I am NOT that refugee

realized that I am NOT that refugee

realized that I am NOT that refugee anymore who feels like nothing i am now

anymore who feels like nothing i am now

anymore who feels like nothing i am now I stand tall I look people in the eyes

I stand tall I look people in the eyes

I stand tall I look people in the eyes and I talk to them I am proud person

and I talk to them I am proud person

and I talk to them I am proud person that moment that moment I felt like I am

that moment that moment I felt like I am

that moment that moment I felt like I am Who I am I am firoz this moment I felt

Who I am I am firoz this moment I felt

Who I am I am firoz this moment I felt complete this moment I felt proud and I

complete this moment I felt proud and I

complete this moment I felt proud and I also learned those moments that they

also learned those moments that they

also learned those moments that they just have they happened 25 years ago

just have they happened 25 years ago

just have they happened 25 years ago they had those moments but I didn’t I

they had those moments but I didn’t I

they had those moments but I didn’t I wasn’t aware about about those moment I

wasn’t aware about about those moment I

wasn’t aware about about those moment I learned like that those moments

learned like that those moments

learned like that those moments shouldn’t be a big one I shouldn’t bike

shouldn’t be a big one I shouldn’t bike

shouldn’t be a big one I shouldn’t bike 400 kilometres to to have such a moment

400 kilometres to to have such a moment

400 kilometres to to have such a moment such a moment can be a laugh with a

such a moment can be a laugh with a

such a moment can be a laugh with a friend a hug from a good friend or or

friend a hug from a good friend or or

friend a hug from a good friend or or just just a smile of sums of someone you

just just a smile of sums of someone you

just just a smile of sums of someone you held and I realized like if I if I just

held and I realized like if I if I just

held and I realized like if I if I just if I just focus on those moments and

if I just focus on those moments and

if I just focus on those moments and like put to myself like this is this is

like put to myself like this is this is

like put to myself like this is this is one of those moments for us you’ll need

one of those moments for us you’ll need

one of those moments for us you’ll need it and when life isn’t easy as as it I

it and when life isn’t easy as as it I

it and when life isn’t easy as as it I would like it to be I look back at those

would like it to be I look back at those

would like it to be I look back at those moments and I tell it say to myself

moments and I tell it say to myself

moments and I tell it say to myself though this is your life this is what

though this is your life this is what

though this is your life this is what was that how you feel now isn’t your

was that how you feel now isn’t your

was that how you feel now isn’t your life this is your life just be aware of

life this is your life just be aware of

life this is your life just be aware of those happy moments and keep in your

those happy moments and keep in your

those happy moments and keep in your mind once home is always home thank

mind once home is always home thank

mind once home is always home thank [Applause]

”

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