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BEST UPCOMING COMEDY MOVIES 2018 (Trailer)


medical marijuana is already a

medical marijuana is already a multibillion-dollar industry the future

multibillion-dollar industry the future

multibillion-dollar industry the future is this weed pill I’m still not sure

is this weed pill I’m still not sure

is this weed pill I’m still not sure about this look most people will tell

about this look most people will tell

about this look most people will tell you as Alden walked on the moment but

you as Alden walked on the moment but

you as Alden walked on the moment but even a complete idiot will tell you Neil

even a complete idiot will tell you Neil

even a complete idiot will tell you Neil Armstrong did it first and do you know

Armstrong did it first and do you know

Armstrong did it first and do you know why he went first because he pushed Buzz

why he went first because he pushed Buzz

why he went first because he pushed Buzz Aldrin out of the way I’m satisfied

Aldrin out of the way I’m satisfied

Aldrin out of the way I’m satisfied [Laughter]

[Laughter]

[Laughter] [Music]

[Music]

[Music] look man you had some deep water Harold

look man you had some deep water Harold

look man you had some deep water Harold like bankruptcy dude then cash pool no

like bankruptcy dude then cash pool no

like bankruptcy dude then cash pool no I’m saying you’re poor poor tomorrow you

I’m saying you’re poor poor tomorrow you

I’m saying you’re poor poor tomorrow you can apply to Mexico what we want you to

can apply to Mexico what we want you to

can apply to Mexico what we want you to hand-deliver the weed pill formula to

hand-deliver the weed pill formula to

hand-deliver the weed pill formula to the lab no I’m not supposed to touch the

the lab no I’m not supposed to touch the

the lab no I’m not supposed to touch the minibar but I’m going to do it you know

minibar but I’m going to do it you know

minibar but I’m going to do it you know I don’t even care anyone I’m doing it

I don’t even care anyone I’m doing it

I don’t even care anyone I’m doing it that having what a crybaby Harold I’m

that having what a crybaby Harold I’m

that having what a crybaby Harold I’m just gonna spit this out okay fee we

just gonna spit this out okay fee we

just gonna spit this out okay fee we sold a little product to the cartels but

sold a little product to the cartels but

sold a little product to the cartels but when we cut them off they got a little

when we cut them off they got a little

when we cut them off they got a little angry

pretty good again now really luckily I

pretty good again now really luckily I know a guy I’ve tracked down dictators

know a guy I’ve tracked down dictators

know a guy I’ve tracked down dictators if I can find a guy in the middle

if I can find a guy in the middle

if I can find a guy in the middle manager check the microchip I need to

manager check the microchip I need to

manager check the microchip I need to keep track II can’t scare me with tales

keep track II can’t scare me with tales

keep track II can’t scare me with tales of the big bad cartels and other things

of the big bad cartels and other things

of the big bad cartels and other things work not in Mexico

work not in Mexico

work not in Mexico cheryl/carol

you really believe in God

you really believe in God of course I believe in God what kind of

of course I believe in God what kind of

of course I believe in God what kind of person does not believe in God I guess I

person does not believe in God I guess I

person does not believe in God I guess I kind of do but not things you can just

kind of do but not things you can just

kind of do but not things you can just have to get that every trust me I have

have to get that every trust me I have

have to get that every trust me I have good instincts we’re down to two teams

good instincts we’re down to two teams

good instincts we’re down to two teams so for double points what is the name of

so for double points what is the name of

so for double points what is the name of the purple Teletubby Susie Winky you’re

the purple Teletubby Susie Winky you’re

the purple Teletubby Susie Winky you’re both correct he always carried red purse

max is very competitive as mine it’s one

max is very competitive as mine it’s one of the reasons I fell in love with him

of the reasons I fell in love with him

of the reasons I fell in love with him oh it’s easy

oh it’s easy

oh it’s easy he was an Incredible Hulk Eric Bana

he was an Incredible Hulk Eric Bana

he was an Incredible Hulk Eric Bana other one Mark Ruffalo other one Lou

other one Mark Ruffalo other one Lou

other one Mark Ruffalo other one Lou Ferrigno primal fear Richard Gere never

Ferrigno primal fear Richard Gere never

Ferrigno primal fear Richard Gere never played the incredible hi Jesus Christ

played the incredible hi Jesus Christ

played the incredible hi Jesus Christ Norton guys what do you say we do this

Norton guys what do you say we do this

Norton guys what do you say we do this at my house next week this will be a

at my house next week this will be a

at my house next week this will be a game night to remember oh boy

tonight we’re taking a game night up a

tonight we’re taking a game night up a notch

we don’t need a board and we do not need

we don’t need a board and we do not need pieces we won’t need an extra rudeness

pieces we won’t need an extra rudeness

pieces we won’t need an extra rudeness either someone in this room is going to

either someone in this room is going to

either someone in this room is going to be taken Oh

be taken Oh

be taken Oh I said murder mystery party whoever

I said murder mystery party whoever

I said murder mystery party whoever finds the victim wins the grand prize

finds the victim wins the grand prize

finds the victim wins the grand prize the keys to the Stingray Josie keys no

the keys to the Stingray Josie keys no

the keys to the Stingray Josie keys no Ryan the whole car oh yeah this is why

Ryan the whole car oh yeah this is why

Ryan the whole car oh yeah this is why don’t we see the best a lot tonight bye

don’t we see the best a lot tonight bye

don’t we see the best a lot tonight bye baby hand me those matches about to burn

baby hand me those matches about to burn

baby hand me those matches about to burn this door down

this door down

this door down you’re gonna light a fire in a

you’re gonna light a fire in a

you’re gonna light a fire in a windowless room that we’re trapped in I

windowless room that we’re trapped in I

windowless room that we’re trapped in I gotta make my idea sound stupid

gotta make my idea sound stupid

gotta make my idea sound stupid you’re not gonna know what’s real what’s

you’re not gonna know what’s real what’s

you’re not gonna know what’s real what’s fake

fake

fake is this John real Oh oh my god I always

is this John real Oh oh my god I always

is this John real Oh oh my god I always enjoy the comradery of good friends

enjoy the comradery of good friends

enjoy the comradery of good friends stuff and we don’t appreciate what we

stuff and we don’t appreciate what we

stuff and we don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone oh because your

have until it’s gone oh because your

have until it’s gone oh because your wife left you

[Music]

[Music] okay I have one idea it’s so crazy it

okay I have one idea it’s so crazy it

okay I have one idea it’s so crazy it just might work

just might work

just might work you’re gonna crash the car into the

you’re gonna crash the car into the

you’re gonna crash the car into the plane like Liam Neeson and taken three

plane like Liam Neeson and taken three

plane like Liam Neeson and taken three he did that and take a three huh

this is instructions on how to remove a

this is instructions on how to remove a bullet didn’t have rubbing alcohol so I

bullet didn’t have rubbing alcohol so I

bullet didn’t have rubbing alcohol so I got you this lovely sharp good idea way

got you this lovely sharp good idea way

got you this lovely sharp good idea way to pivot what is helpful in country

to pivot what is helpful in country

to pivot what is helpful in country living oh that’s the latest there’s a

living oh that’s the latest there’s a

living oh that’s the latest there’s a corn chowder recipe looks really good

corn chowder recipe looks really good

corn chowder recipe looks really good huh he loves my chatter do ya

but this mother I’m in what’s going

but this mother I’m in what’s going through the laundry found these new

through the laundry found these new

through the laundry found these new phone lines become a strip that down for

phone lines become a strip that down for

phone lines become a strip that down for me tonight I’m tearing these up with my

me tonight I’m tearing these up with my

me tonight I’m tearing these up with my teeth like an old school cartoon vinegar

teeth like an old school cartoon vinegar

teeth like an old school cartoon vinegar honey Mitch does your daughter’s okay

I’m ready

I’m ready you look beautiful I used to hold that

you look beautiful I used to hold that

you look beautiful I used to hold that girl in the palm of my hand

girl in the palm of my hand

girl in the palm of my hand Kayla’s becoming a woman you’re gonna

Kayla’s becoming a woman you’re gonna

Kayla’s becoming a woman you’re gonna have to deal with that thanks dad why

have to deal with that thanks dad why

have to deal with that thanks dad why are you here you think I’m gonna miss

are you here you think I’m gonna miss

are you here you think I’m gonna miss the most important that if you’re young

the most important that if you’re young

the most important that if you’re young hey there’s my graduation graduation is

hey there’s my graduation graduation is

hey there’s my graduation graduation is for losers tonight is the first night of

for losers tonight is the first night of

for losers tonight is the first night of our adult lives I want to go to prom

our adult lives I want to go to prom

our adult lives I want to go to prom gonna lose my goddamn virginity prom

gonna lose my goddamn virginity prom

gonna lose my goddamn virginity prom night it’s kind of perfect

night it’s kind of perfect

night it’s kind of perfect I’m in Julie after that top roping

I’m in Julie after that top roping

I’m in Julie after that top roping you’re just doing our kids all emojis

you’re just doing our kids all emojis

you’re just doing our kids all emojis have a secret meaning Oh eggplants are

have a secret meaning Oh eggplants are

have a secret meaning Oh eggplants are dicks this is some kind of a dick

dicks this is some kind of a dick

dicks this is some kind of a dick related agreement our girls are not

related agreement our girls are not

related agreement our girls are not thinking things through I’m gonna stop

thinking things through I’m gonna stop

thinking things through I’m gonna stop them I’m in I’m fully planning on having

them I’m in I’m fully planning on having

them I’m in I’m fully planning on having sex to me wherever the night takes us

sex to me wherever the night takes us

sex to me wherever the night takes us the night’s gonna take us there wherever

the night’s gonna take us there wherever

the night’s gonna take us there wherever the wind sails our ships your ship is

the wind sails our ships your ship is

the wind sails our ships your ship is going into my Harbor

going into my Harbor

going into my Harbor [Music]

[Music]

[Music] there did only wwvv what would Vin

there did only wwvv what would Vin

there did only wwvv what would Vin Diesel do

hey fastness furious is completely

hey fastness furious is completely unrealistic it’s not a documentary I get

unrealistic it’s not a documentary I get

unrealistic it’s not a documentary I get that

I’ll do anything for my daughter what

I’ll do anything for my daughter what about chugging contest

about chugging contest

about chugging contest bring it no no right we’re butt chugging

bring it no no right we’re butt chugging

bring it no no right we’re butt chugging on the count of three they got a lager

on the count of three they got a lager

on the count of three they got a lager or an IPA does it doesn’t it doesn’t

or an IPA does it doesn’t it doesn’t

or an IPA does it doesn’t it doesn’t matter oh my god Jesus he’s

matter oh my god Jesus he’s

matter oh my god Jesus he’s spit-roasting himself

are you a team player or aren’t you I

are you a team player or aren’t you I just chugged a 40 with my asshole I’m a

just chugged a 40 with my asshole I’m a

just chugged a 40 with my asshole I’m a team player

team player

team player [Music]

[Music]

[Music] I was born into war brought it into it

I was born into war brought it into it

I was born into war brought it into it people think they understand that but

people think they understand that but

people think they understand that but they have no concept of it what’s the

they have no concept of it what’s the

they have no concept of it what’s the most pain you’ve ever felt maybe the

most pain you’ve ever felt maybe the

most pain you’ve ever felt maybe the kind that leaves you more machine man

kind that leaves you more machine man

kind that leaves you more machine man wait no stop what in the actual ass Dale

wait no stop what in the actual ass Dale

wait no stop what in the actual ass Dale what why why are the visual effects not

what why why are the visual effects not

what why why are the visual effects not done it’s a metal arm it’s not like

done it’s a metal arm it’s not like

done it’s a metal arm it’s not like we’re trying to remove a mustache oh

we’re trying to remove a mustache oh

we’re trying to remove a mustache oh fuck it

fuck it

fuck it I’ll do it myself I’m table and I’m from

I’ll do it myself I’m table and I’m from

I’ll do it myself I’m table and I’m from the future and I like blowing shit up

oh no sheriff Deadpool you know you’re a

oh no sheriff Deadpool you know you’re a lot taller in the shut up you little

lot taller in the shut up you little

lot taller in the shut up you little asshole take this regeneration powers

asshole take this regeneration powers

asshole take this regeneration powers activate that’s not something simple I

activate that’s not something simple I

activate that’s not something simple I got the stones to help you buddy they’re

got the stones to help you buddy they’re

got the stones to help you buddy they’re done already

done already

done already oh wow that was unrealistic we fast okay

oh wow that was unrealistic we fast okay

oh wow that was unrealistic we fast okay Eddie

your time’s up you dumb fuck well that’s

your time’s up you dumb fuck well that’s just lazy writing

just lazy writing

just lazy writing [Music]

sophomores the assignment was to write

sophomores the assignment was to write to a role model someone you admire miss

to a role model someone you admire miss

to a role model someone you admire miss miles here to tell us who you wrote –

miles here to tell us who you wrote –

miles here to tell us who you wrote – Anton Vincent the dictator you found

Anton Vincent the dictator you found

Anton Vincent the dictator you found evidence on their computers yes they do

evidence on their computers yes they do

evidence on their computers yes they do not have computers and then how did you

not have computers and then how did you

not have computers and then how did you know they were traitors

know they were traitors

know they were traitors you said they were sir I admire his

you said they were sir I admire his

you said they were sir I admire his style

style

style dear Tatiana your letters have been a

dear Tatiana your letters have been a

dear Tatiana your letters have been a welcome respite from my struggles there

welcome respite from my struggles there

welcome respite from my struggles there is a rebel faction that wants to behead

is a rebel faction that wants to behead

is a rebel faction that wants to behead me there is no one I can trust I can

me there is no one I can trust I can

me there is no one I can trust I can totally relate my mom is having an

totally relate my mom is having an

totally relate my mom is having an affair with her creepy boss my school is

affair with her creepy boss my school is

affair with her creepy boss my school is ruled by some Mean Girls that call

ruled by some Mean Girls that call

ruled by some Mean Girls that call themselves slushies and the guy I’m into

themselves slushies and the guy I’m into

themselves slushies and the guy I’m into is a Jesus Freak I’m sorry I don’t know

is a Jesus Freak I’m sorry I don’t know

is a Jesus Freak I’m sorry I don’t know why I did that sometimes they feel like

why I did that sometimes they feel like

why I did that sometimes they feel like you’re the only one who gets me

you’re the only one who gets me

you’re the only one who gets me communist dictator Anton Vinson has been

communist dictator Anton Vinson has been

communist dictator Anton Vinson has been ousted and still unaccounted for

you’re smaller than I imagined you’re

you’re smaller than I imagined you’re older I’m very fine but you need a

older I’m very fine but you need a

older I’m very fine but you need a disguise this is me please don’t be mad

disguise this is me please don’t be mad

disguise this is me please don’t be mad I was gonna tell you gonna keep a child

I was gonna tell you gonna keep a child

I was gonna tell you gonna keep a child molester is a dictator he is a political

molester is a dictator he is a political

molester is a dictator he is a political refugee completely harmless is a

refugee completely harmless is a

refugee completely harmless is a horrible person you have power you don’t

horrible person you have power you don’t

horrible person you have power you don’t know how to wield it easy for you to say

know how to wield it easy for you to say

know how to wield it easy for you to say rebel never accepts the rebel charges

rebel never accepts the rebel charges

rebel never accepts the rebel charges and the moment is right disrupt the

and the moment is right disrupt the

and the moment is right disrupt the slushy sow with decisive action you must

slushy sow with decisive action you must

slushy sow with decisive action you must have the courage to do what you believe

have the courage to do what you believe

have the courage to do what you believe even that’s the ones that you love

[Applause]

[Applause] she was the girl of my dreams that was

she was the girl of my dreams that was

she was the girl of my dreams that was the moment I knew that it was done we

the moment I knew that it was done we

the moment I knew that it was done we met three years ago you are a league of

met three years ago you are a league of

met three years ago you are a league of their own right you gari excellent what

their own right you gari excellent what

their own right you gari excellent what is your favorite drink grapefruit juice

is your favorite drink grapefruit juice

is your favorite drink grapefruit juice with vodka and three maraschino cherries

with vodka and three maraschino cherries

with vodka and three maraschino cherries hey you wanna get out of here yeah it

hey you wanna get out of here yeah it

hey you wanna get out of here yeah it was the perfect first date so much fun

was the perfect first date so much fun

was the perfect first date so much fun but I went too long and then I got hug

but I went too long and then I got hug

but I went too long and then I got hug death oh this is so nice to have a good

death oh this is so nice to have a good

death oh this is so nice to have a good guy friend I can’t even tell you

in love with a tree only I could go back

in love with a tree only I could go back and do it with you differently all right

and do it with you differently all right

and do it with you differently all right could be the granite guy should we want

could you tell me what year it is it’s

could you tell me what year it is it’s the 2014 I just traveled back in time

right now I have someone to meet what’s

right now I have someone to meet what’s your favorite drink

your favorite drink

your favorite drink mine is grapefruit juice with – vodka

mine is grapefruit juice with – vodka

mine is grapefruit juice with – vodka and exactly three maraschino cherries

and exactly three maraschino cherries

and exactly three maraschino cherries that’s my favorite drink juice what this

that’s my favorite drink juice what this

that’s my favorite drink juice what this is the psycho I was telling you about

is the psycho I was telling you about

is the psycho I was telling you about you didn’t guess that I was an army brat

you didn’t guess that I was an army brat

you didn’t guess that I was an army brat you already knew that you’re a stalker

you already knew that you’re a stalker

you already knew that you’re a stalker soccer’s or we’re like two inch coats

soccer’s or we’re like two inch coats

soccer’s or we’re like two inch coats and no underwear and I am clearly

and no underwear and I am clearly

and no underwear and I am clearly wearing underwear look

wearing underwear look

wearing underwear look [Music]

the photo booth is a time machine this

the photo booth is a time machine this is gonna be the best night of your life

is gonna be the best night of your life

is gonna be the best night of your life I can deal with best night of my life

I can deal with best night of my life

I can deal with best night of my life follow what I do ready

follow what I do ready

follow what I do ready what’s up girl hmm what’s up girl

what’s up girl hmm what’s up girl

what’s up girl hmm what’s up girl huh are you doing the Joker

huh are you doing the Joker

huh are you doing the Joker impersonation this is no this is like it

impersonation this is no this is like it

impersonation this is no this is like it was good

was good

was good all else fails be an asshole be an

all else fails be an asshole be an

all else fails be an asshole be an asshole not hard asshole soft asshole

asshole not hard asshole soft asshole

asshole not hard asshole soft asshole don’t forget your leather pants oh my

don’t forget your leather pants oh my

don’t forget your leather pants oh my god I went full asshole I have no

god I went full asshole I have no

god I went full asshole I have no control over any of this I admit the

control over any of this I admit the

control over any of this I admit the decision and then I wake up three years

decision and then I wake up three years

decision and then I wake up three years later with the consequences I thought

later with the consequences I thought

later with the consequences I thought things were supposed to happen for a

things were supposed to happen for a

things were supposed to happen for a reason things happen for no reason at

reason things happen for no reason at

reason things happen for no reason at all but they create opportunities the

all but they create opportunities the

all but they create opportunities the question is can you recognize that next

question is can you recognize that next

question is can you recognize that next opportunity when it matters the most

oh I’m gonna Bob shut up mom

oh I’m gonna Bob shut up mom I got about it’s it’s fine I’m sorry my

I got about it’s it’s fine I’m sorry my

I got about it’s it’s fine I’m sorry my bomb threat ruin your magic or even

bomb threat ruin your magic or even

bomb threat ruin your magic or even didn’t have a great life

why am I even trying to be a nurse I’m

why am I even trying to be a nurse I’m gonna be delivering pizzas and cleaning

gonna be delivering pizzas and cleaning

gonna be delivering pizzas and cleaning carpets for the rest of my life you’re

carpets for the rest of my life you’re

carpets for the rest of my life you’re very attractive for a carpeting lady

very attractive for a carpeting lady

very attractive for a carpeting lady although you may be could do something

although you may be could do something

although you may be could do something with your hair yeah no that’s not it

with your hair yeah no that’s not it

with your hair yeah no that’s not it it’s your face yeah give me a neck you

it’s your face yeah give me a neck you

it’s your face yeah give me a neck you know I was just hired to do carpets

know I was just hired to do carpets

know I was just hired to do carpets right you’re fired

right you’re fired

right you’re fired I bet you haven’t worked a single day in

I bet you haven’t worked a single day in

I bet you haven’t worked a single day in your entire self-absorbed life just pay

your entire self-absorbed life just pay

your entire self-absorbed life just pay me and I’ll be on my way

me and I’ll be on my way

me and I’ll be on my way nope he’s the devil I owe the cleaning

nope he’s the devil I owe the cleaning

nope he’s the devil I owe the cleaning company 3000 bucks for a new machine and

company 3000 bucks for a new machine and

company 3000 bucks for a new machine and they fired me rich people he’d get away

they fired me rich people he’d get away

they fired me rich people he’d get away with everything I don’t know what day it

with everything I don’t know what day it

with everything I don’t know what day it is I don’t even know my own name of

is I don’t even know my own name of

is I don’t even know my own name of ninja in our little town that’s him I

ninja in our little town that’s him I

ninja in our little town that’s him I have an idea that is poetic in its

have an idea that is poetic in its

have an idea that is poetic in its justice I’m here to pick up my husband

justice I’m here to pick up my husband

justice I’m here to pick up my husband give me my wife for better worse baby

yep we had to use the sperm donor you’re

yep we had to use the sperm donor you’re getting picked up for work bright and

getting picked up for work bright and

getting picked up for work bright and early I work three jobs

so we need to take them to the hospital

so we need to take them to the hospital even Bobby nobody else do it like that

good afternoon my Scotia as you know

good afternoon my Scotia as you know parole and a privilege it’s a mistake

parole and a privilege it’s a mistake

parole and a privilege it’s a mistake but it happened and if I were to be

but it happened and if I were to be

but it happened and if I were to be released I would um I would just want

released I would um I would just want

released I would um I would just want the simple life I just want to hold down

the simple life I just want to hold down

the simple life I just want to hold down a job make some friends you know pay my

a job make some friends you know pay my

a job make some friends you know pay my bills even if this was possible it makes

bills even if this was possible it makes

bills even if this was possible it makes twenty paint seven people why do you

twenty paint seven people why do you

twenty paint seven people why do you need to do this cuz it’s what I’m gonna

need to do this cuz it’s what I’m gonna

need to do this cuz it’s what I’m gonna how long would it take you to make seven

how long would it take you to make seven

how long would it take you to make seven pieces of jewelry in five or six hours

pieces of jewelry in five or six hours

pieces of jewelry in five or six hours how long if I told you you didn’t have

how long if I told you you didn’t have

how long if I told you you didn’t have to live with your mother anymore it’s

to live with your mother anymore it’s

to live with your mother anymore it’s neat the one it was quite what do you

neat the one it was quite what do you

neat the one it was quite what do you bless

which man named wall which real name

which man named wall which real name Abel what if we could make all this go

Abel what if we could make all this go

Abel what if we could make all this go away then purrs as well sorry okay I’m

away then purrs as well sorry okay I’m

away then purrs as well sorry okay I’m with my family I told you coming in

with my family I told you coming in

with my family I told you coming in garage finally tell you how big a job

garage finally tell you how big a job

garage finally tell you how big a job knows I’m out good job I’ll be back

knows I’m out good job I’ll be back

knows I’m out good job I’ll be back before you know can I come with you this

before you know can I come with you this

before you know can I come with you this is mommy’s very special work trip

[Music]

[Music] in three and a half weeks the Met will

in three and a half weeks the Met will

in three and a half weeks the Met will be hosting its annual ball and we are

be hosting its annual ball and we are

be hosting its annual ball and we are going to Robin not the ball itself the

going to Robin not the ball itself the

going to Robin not the ball itself the neck of Daphne Kluger valued at over a

neck of Daphne Kluger valued at over a

neck of Daphne Kluger valued at over a hundred million dollars revenge it’s a

hundred million dollars revenge it’s a

hundred million dollars revenge it’s a twofer do not run a job in a job

[Music]

[Music] there’s fish can’t we just go to this do

there’s fish can’t we just go to this do

there’s fish can’t we just go to this do we have to steal stuff yes

[Music]

[Music] is it genetic of the whole family like

is it genetic of the whole family like

is it genetic of the whole family like this literally

this literally

this literally [Music]

breaking news a star-studded event at

breaking news a star-studded event at the level Hotel in Los Angeles has been

the level Hotel in Los Angeles has been

the level Hotel in Los Angeles has been taken over by armed gunmen we now go to

taken over by armed gunmen we now go to

taken over by armed gunmen we now go to a live feed from the assailants and can

a live feed from the assailants and can

a live feed from the assailants and can confirm that one of the hostages is

confirm that one of the hostages is

confirm that one of the hostages is international pop star shaggy

international pop star shaggy

international pop star shaggy yeah you know saying he’s happening say

yeah you know saying he’s happening say

yeah you know saying he’s happening say wasn’t me singing it shaggy

wasn’t me singing it shaggy

wasn’t me singing it shaggy honey came in and she caught me

honey came in and she caught me

honey came in and she caught me red-handed creeping with a girl next

red-handed creeping with a girl next

red-handed creeping with a girl next door this we were both butt-naked and

door this we were both butt-naked and

door this we were both butt-naked and you know that’s too far

you know that’s too far

you know that’s too far how do i fork instead I have given a

how do i fork instead I have given a

how do i fork instead I have given a extra key

[Music]

[Music] we have three waiters on the run I think

we have three waiters on the run I think

we have three waiters on the run I think we should turn ourselves in

we should turn ourselves in

we should turn ourselves in what’s with the buckets I’m showing them

what’s with the buckets I’m showing them

what’s with the buckets I’m showing them I’m unarmed we can take them my name is

I’m unarmed we can take them my name is

I’m unarmed we can take them my name is Alex but three exes I’m about to go

Alex but three exes I’m about to go

Alex but three exes I’m about to go explosive on these motherfuckers 3x

explosive on these motherfuckers 3x

explosive on these motherfuckers 3x means poison by the way it’s also a Vin

means poison by the way it’s also a Vin

means poison by the way it’s also a Vin Diesel movie

sorry

sorry new seals transporters what are you

new seals transporters what are you

new seals transporters what are you doing up there Oh God the hell are you

doing up there Oh God the hell are you

doing up there Oh God the hell are you doing they’re here to help us but not

doing they’re here to help us but not

doing they’re here to help us but not get a little coolies shit getting saved

get a little coolies shit getting saved

get a little coolies shit getting saved by the LAPD even listen to Kendrick

by the LAPD even listen to Kendrick

by the LAPD even listen to Kendrick Lamar loves me I can’t believe I

Lamar loves me I can’t believe I

Lamar loves me I can’t believe I followed a loser like you around for

followed a loser like you around for

followed a loser like you around for years

years

years guys stop you just shot at me I shot

guys stop you just shot at me I shot

guys stop you just shot at me I shot near you bitch

– –

– – let’s do it they’ve been waiting for a

let’s do it they’ve been waiting for a

let’s do it they’ve been waiting for a second chance waiting for their country

second chance waiting for their country

second chance waiting for their country to need them again

to need them again

to need them again that time is meow you guys give me if I

that time is meow you guys give me if I

that time is meow you guys give me if I kill that bird Barbara that’s a bald

kill that bird Barbara that’s a bald

kill that bird Barbara that’s a bald eagle get away Baldy guys what do I win

eagle get away Baldy guys what do I win

eagle get away Baldy guys what do I win one-way ticket to hell it turns out the

one-way ticket to hell it turns out the

one-way ticket to hell it turns out the french-canadian town st. George junior

french-canadian town st. George junior

french-canadian town st. George junior rock is actually on American soil

rock is actually on American soil

rock is actually on American soil you’ll be phasing out a Canadian Mountie

you’ll be phasing out a Canadian Mountie

you’ll be phasing out a Canadian Mountie unit best behavior boy our idea of a

unit best behavior boy our idea of a

unit best behavior boy our idea of a good time either fellas personally I’d

good time either fellas personally I’d

good time either fellas personally I’d rather fuck a moose you wouldn’t need a

rather fuck a moose you wouldn’t need a

rather fuck a moose you wouldn’t need a ladder to do that Wow let’s give a big

ladder to do that Wow let’s give a big

ladder to do that Wow let’s give a big Canadian welcome to the vanwall highway

Canadian welcome to the vanwall highway

Canadian welcome to the vanwall highway by far come on guys they’ve come up here

by far come on guys they’ve come up here

by far come on guys they’ve come up here to tell us how great it’s gonna be for

to tell us how great it’s gonna be for

to tell us how great it’s gonna be for all of us to become Americans

this is happening mr. Mousavi I killed

this is happening mr. Mousavi I killed Vitas was alleged in either of you speak

Vitas was alleged in either of you speak

Vitas was alleged in either of you speak English I did we would like to eat your

English I did we would like to eat your

English I did we would like to eat your paper can you show me your party papers

paper can you show me your party papers

paper can you show me your party papers this time everything will be by the book

this time everything will be by the book

this time everything will be by the book everything

hey Tim Horton’s ghost

hey Tim Horton’s ghost we’re gonna get for you guys whole beer

we’re gonna get for you guys whole beer

we’re gonna get for you guys whole beer liter of Cola what did you say do you

liter of Cola what did you say do you

liter of Cola what did you say do you want a liter of Cola Canada’s pretty

want a liter of Cola Canada’s pretty

want a liter of Cola Canada’s pretty awesome don’t do that

brother Sokka grey poupon machi de

brother Sokka grey poupon machi de saturated weed feather duster Co are so

saturated weed feather duster Co are so

saturated weed feather duster Co are so name is Rob Liefeld catcher Luc

name is Rob Liefeld catcher Luc

name is Rob Liefeld catcher Luc Robitaille delt onion PA Fran Tarkenton

Robitaille delt onion PA Fran Tarkenton

Robitaille delt onion PA Fran Tarkenton t-nut was their prophet

[Music]

[Music] I don’t regret staying at home and being

I don’t regret staying at home and being

I don’t regret staying at home and being your mom but I regret not getting my

your mom but I regret not getting my

your mom but I regret not getting my degree

degree

degree that’s why somebody’s mom just enrolled

that’s why somebody’s mom just enrolled

that’s why somebody’s mom just enrolled in college I’m referring to myself I’ll

in college I’m referring to myself I’ll

in college I’m referring to myself I’ll see you around the quad nobody says that

see you around the quad nobody says that

see you around the quad nobody says that mom well bring it back I think those

mom well bring it back I think those

mom well bring it back I think those guys just checked you out they’re just

guys just checked you out they’re just

guys just checked you out they’re just looking at my smock it tends to catch

looking at my smock it tends to catch

looking at my smock it tends to catch the light mom you’re a college girl now

the light mom you’re a college girl now

the light mom you’re a college girl now and we gotta make some changes

and we gotta make some changes

and we gotta make some changes no we don’t know where that’s been oh

no we don’t know where that’s been oh

no we don’t know where that’s been oh gosh

what are you 20 in the stacks a nurse

what are you 20 in the stacks a nurse Lex no shut up frame I’m older and wiser

Lex no shut up frame I’m older and wiser

Lex no shut up frame I’m older and wiser this essentially a Google ask me

this essentially a Google ask me

this essentially a Google ask me anything

anything

anything turn off your boo Google you’re scaring

turn off your boo Google you’re scaring

turn off your boo Google you’re scaring me I think my google scared Jack last

me I think my google scared Jack last

me I think my google scared Jack last night oh my god but in a good way I like

night oh my god but in a good way I like

night oh my god but in a good way I like when you intentionally go through a

when you intentionally go through a

when you intentionally go through a haunted house

[Applause]

[Applause] [Music]

yeah that could be a nasty sprain why

yeah that could be a nasty sprain why don’t I get you some ice

don’t I get you some ice

don’t I get you some ice maybe a cup of coffee what’s in the

maybe a cup of coffee what’s in the

maybe a cup of coffee what’s in the holder there my infidelity formula your

holder there my infidelity formula your

holder there my infidelity formula your infidelity formula that it works ten

infidelity formula that it works ten

infidelity formula that it works ten million people that greatly and as a

million people that greatly and as a

million people that greatly and as a fail-safe you break up after six months

fail-safe you break up after six months

fail-safe you break up after six months of dating

of dating

of dating statistically speaking it’s not safe to

statistically speaking it’s not safe to

statistically speaking it’s not safe to date for longer than that what if I

date for longer than that what if I

date for longer than that what if I could offer a way to prove your theory

could offer a way to prove your theory

could offer a way to prove your theory wrong I don’t see how you’d be able to

wrong I don’t see how you’d be able to

wrong I don’t see how you’d be able to do that all we would need to do is find

do that all we would need to do is find

do that all we would need to do is find a group of people who’ve been in a

a group of people who’ve been in a

a group of people who’ve been in a relationship for longer than six months

relationship for longer than six months

relationship for longer than six months and give them an opportunity to cheat

and give them an opportunity to cheat

and give them an opportunity to cheat without getting caught what are you

without getting caught what are you

without getting caught what are you proposing I’m suggesting a little

proposing I’m suggesting a little

proposing I’m suggesting a little competition I pick five of my friends

competition I pick five of my friends

competition I pick five of my friends who’ve been in a relationship for longer

who’ve been in a relationship for longer

who’ve been in a relationship for longer than six months and you pick the

than six months and you pick the

than six months and you pick the Enchantress’s who will be their downfall

Enchantress’s who will be their downfall

Enchantress’s who will be their downfall oh that’s great

oh that’s great

oh that’s great chest out well what is a competition

chest out well what is a competition

chest out well what is a competition that’s three out of five wins underwear

that’s three out of five wins underwear

that’s three out of five wins underwear is perfect she wants you to go to her

is perfect she wants you to go to her

is perfect she wants you to go to her place to show her how to use gym equip

place to show her how to use gym equip

place to show her how to use gym equip you know I’m a professional didn’t get

you know I’m a professional didn’t get

you know I’m a professional didn’t get your mind out of there

you’re wrong about people it’s not that

you’re wrong about people it’s not that simple but it is good thing this is

simple but it is good thing this is

simple but it is good thing this is almost over you turn it into a regular

almost over you turn it into a regular

almost over you turn it into a regular gangster it’s not over yet

gangster it’s not over yet

gangster it’s not over yet [Music]

”

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