we know videogames require some limitations but these are just
limitations but these are just
limitations but these are just ridiculous Stanley walked through the
ridiculous Stanley walked through the
ridiculous Stanley walked through the red door welcome to watchmojo.com and
red door welcome to watchmojo.com and
red door welcome to watchmojo.com and today we’ll be counting down our picks
today we’ll be counting down our picks
today we’ll be counting down our picks for the top 10 things badass videogame
for the top 10 things badass videogame
for the top 10 things badass videogame characters cannot do I still don’t think
characters cannot do I still don’t think
characters cannot do I still don’t think we’re communicating properly Stanley
we’re communicating properly Stanley
we’re communicating properly Stanley walked through the red door for this
walked through the red door for this
walked through the red door for this list we’re taking a look at videogame
list we’re taking a look at videogame
list we’re taking a look at videogame characters with amazing abilities that
characters with amazing abilities that
characters with amazing abilities that are still unable to perform easy
are still unable to perform easy
are still unable to perform easy everyday tasks number 10
everyday tasks number 10
everyday tasks number 10 say no to a challenge what’s that cloud
say no to a challenge what’s that cloud
say no to a challenge what’s that cloud you think you can take him well if you
you think you can take him well if you
you think you can take him well if you insist nice knowing you sporadic battles
insist nice knowing you sporadic battles
insist nice knowing you sporadic battles are commonplace in most role-playing
are commonplace in most role-playing
are commonplace in most role-playing games while these battles will help your
games while these battles will help your
games while these battles will help your character gain experience and level up
character gain experience and level up
character gain experience and level up occasionally you just want to get on
occasionally you just want to get on
occasionally you just want to get on with main quest remember cut the ones
with main quest remember cut the ones
with main quest remember cut the ones that matter I know I know
that matter I know I know
that matter I know I know alas some characters are simply
alas some characters are simply
alas some characters are simply incapable of rejecting a fight in the
incapable of rejecting a fight in the
incapable of rejecting a fight in the Pokemon games for example there is
Pokemon games for example there is
Pokemon games for example there is always a fellow trainer waiting to
always a fellow trainer waiting to
always a fellow trainer waiting to challenge you around every corner as
challenge you around every corner as
challenge you around every corner as much as you’d like to peacefully pass by
much as you’d like to peacefully pass by
much as you’d like to peacefully pass by saying no to these battles is never an
saying no to these battles is never an
saying no to these battles is never an option
this is especially frustrating when
this is especially frustrating when you’re almost completely drained of
you’re almost completely drained of
you’re almost completely drained of health and since you can’t flee you have
health and since you can’t flee you have
health and since you can’t flee you have no choice but to accept that it’s pretty
no choice but to accept that it’s pretty
no choice but to accept that it’s pretty much game over number nine
much game over number nine
much game over number nine remove their undergarments fishing been
remove their undergarments fishing been
remove their undergarments fishing been away shit have changed around here
away shit have changed around here
away shit have changed around here grocery families ain’t big no more a lot
grocery families ain’t big no more a lot
grocery families ain’t big no more a lot of video games allow the player to dress
of video games allow the player to dress
of video games allow the player to dress their character however they see fit you
their character however they see fit you
their character however they see fit you can even make them casually roll around
can even make them casually roll around
can even make them casually roll around in their underwear and nobody’ll really
in their underwear and nobody’ll really
in their underwear and nobody’ll really bat 9 ah here’s the blushing bride now
bat 9 ah here’s the blushing bride now
bat 9 ah here’s the blushing bride now let’s begin the ceremony one thing you
let’s begin the ceremony one thing you
let’s begin the ceremony one thing you can never seem to do though is have your
can never seem to do though is have your
can never seem to do though is have your character walk around in their birthday
character walk around in their birthday
character walk around in their birthday suit why do so many characters draw that
suit why do so many characters draw that
suit why do so many characters draw that line and taking off their tighty whities
line and taking off their tighty whities
line and taking off their tighty whities no homie love no huh
no homie love no huh
no homie love no huh don’t they eventually have to bathe what
don’t they eventually have to bathe what
don’t they eventually have to bathe what if they need to get a colonoscopy hasn’t
if they need to get a colonoscopy hasn’t
if they need to get a colonoscopy hasn’t anybody ever heard of going commando
anybody ever heard of going commando
anybody ever heard of going commando we’re watching you whatever you say
we’re watching you whatever you say
we’re watching you whatever you say bitch of course if you really want to
bitch of course if you really want to
bitch of course if you really want to get naked in a game you can always play
get naked in a game you can always play
get naked in a game you can always play Saints Row 4 not Lincoln this just got
Saints Row 4 not Lincoln this just got
Saints Row 4 not Lincoln this just got weird okay can i flow now knock yourself
weird okay can i flow now knock yourself
weird okay can i flow now knock yourself at number 8
at number 8
at number 8 hold a gun and a flashlight at the same
hold a gun and a flashlight at the same
hold a gun and a flashlight at the same time I don’t know how I survived one can
time I don’t know how I survived one can
time I don’t know how I survived one can only do so much with two hands but we’re
only do so much with two hands but we’re
only do so much with two hands but we’re pretty sure that you can carry both a
pretty sure that you can carry both a
pretty sure that you can carry both a small gun and a flashlight
small gun and a flashlight
small gun and a flashlight simultaneously apparently this is too
simultaneously apparently this is too
simultaneously apparently this is too difficult for your character in Doom 3
difficult for your character in Doom 3
difficult for your character in Doom 3 though so you have to keep switching
though so you have to keep switching
though so you have to keep switching between these two items which is
between these two items which is
between these two items which is especially inconvenient considering that
especially inconvenient considering that
especially inconvenient considering that the danger is always lurking in the dark
hey Alan wait can carry a gun and
hey Alan wait can carry a gun and flashlight at the same time link can
flashlight at the same time link can
flashlight at the same time link can carry his sword and a lantern at the
carry his sword and a lantern at the
carry his sword and a lantern at the same time if you count attaching it to
same time if you count attaching it to
same time if you count attaching it to his belt
his belt
his belt why can’t you multitask here we’re at
why can’t you multitask here we’re at
why can’t you multitask here we’re at very least to get a gun with a
very least to get a gun with a
very least to get a gun with a flashlight attached to it is there no
flashlight attached to it is there no
flashlight attached to it is there no duct tape on Mars
number 7 make decisions for themselves
number 7 make decisions for themselves you said no you wouldn’t refuse that’s a
you said no you wouldn’t refuse that’s a
you said no you wouldn’t refuse that’s a yes right a fair deal of modern games
yes right a fair deal of modern games
yes right a fair deal of modern games are driven by choice like the Mass
are driven by choice like the Mass
are driven by choice like the Mass Effect trilogy and to a certain extent
Effect trilogy and to a certain extent
Effect trilogy and to a certain extent the Stanley parable remember that unlike
the Stanley parable remember that unlike
the Stanley parable remember that unlike here the real world makes sense and at
here the real world makes sense and at
here the real world makes sense and at no time should you make a choice that
no time should you make a choice that
no time should you make a choice that does not conform to rational logic for
does not conform to rational logic for
does not conform to rational logic for the most part however video games leave
the most part however video games leave
the most part however video games leave free will out of the question
free will out of the question
free will out of the question giving players specific objectives to
giving players specific objectives to
giving players specific objectives to complete with no alternative mario has
complete with no alternative mario has
complete with no alternative mario has to save the princess
to save the princess
to save the princess Donkey Kong has to reclaim his hoard of
Donkey Kong has to reclaim his hoard of
Donkey Kong has to reclaim his hoard of bananas Franklin has to help that stupid
bananas Franklin has to help that stupid
bananas Franklin has to help that stupid paparazzi if he makes the mistake of
paparazzi if he makes the mistake of
paparazzi if he makes the mistake of getting too close
getting too close
getting too close leave me out you’ll shit me no no no we
leave me out you’ll shit me no no no we
leave me out you’ll shit me no no no we can make beaucoup bucks your man these
can make beaucoup bucks your man these
can make beaucoup bucks your man these video game characters are always being
video game characters are always being
video game characters are always being manipulated by their surroundings and
manipulated by their surroundings and
manipulated by their surroundings and controlled by a grand puppet master
controlled by a grand puppet master
controlled by a grand puppet master incapable of making any decisions for
incapable of making any decisions for
incapable of making any decisions for themselves man things just got kind of
themselves man things just got kind of
themselves man things just got kind of philosophical eh yeah God you used to be
philosophical eh yeah God you used to be
philosophical eh yeah God you used to be cool just because I’m a gamer doesn’t
cool just because I’m a gamer doesn’t
cool just because I’m a gamer doesn’t mean I’m not cool
mean I’m not cool
mean I’m not cool number 6 break down wood indoors if door
number 6 break down wood indoors if door
number 6 break down wood indoors if door is made of metal or solid titanium it
is made of metal or solid titanium it
is made of metal or solid titanium it makes sense that you shouldn’t be able
makes sense that you shouldn’t be able
makes sense that you shouldn’t be able to simply break it down last time we
to simply break it down last time we
to simply break it down last time we checked though wooden doors are not
checked though wooden doors are not
checked though wooden doors are not indestructible even when they’re locked
indestructible even when they’re locked
indestructible even when they’re locked from the other side it’s nothing that
from the other side it’s nothing that
from the other side it’s nothing that blunt force or a few explosives
blunt force or a few explosives
blunt force or a few explosives shouldn’t be able to fix things that
shouldn’t be able to fix things that
shouldn’t be able to fix things that your character generally specializes in
your character generally specializes in
your character generally specializes in yeah I guess there’s a thing or two I
yeah I guess there’s a thing or two I
yeah I guess there’s a thing or two I could show you imagine how quickly we
could show you imagine how quickly we
could show you imagine how quickly we could blast through every Zelda dungeon
could blast through every Zelda dungeon
could blast through every Zelda dungeon if bombs worked on those locked doors
if bombs worked on those locked doors
if bombs worked on those locked doors alas wooden doors are simply every video
alas wooden doors are simply every video
alas wooden doors are simply every video game characters kryptonite you know I
game characters kryptonite you know I
game characters kryptonite you know I could break you down I just don’t feel
could break you down I just don’t feel
could break you down I just don’t feel like it if you want to get past one
like it if you want to get past one
like it if you want to get past one either find a key or master the art of
either find a key or master the art of
either find a key or master the art of lock picking if that’s an option
number five yell at annoying AI
number five yell at annoying AI characters I know you’d be fine if you
characters I know you’d be fine if you
characters I know you’d be fine if you landed on your butt in a perfect world
landed on your butt in a perfect world
landed on your butt in a perfect world every AI character would be as awesome
every AI character would be as awesome
every AI character would be as awesome as Elizabeth from BioShock Infinite
as Elizabeth from BioShock Infinite
as Elizabeth from BioShock Infinite Yuri huh instead we mostly get stuck
Yuri huh instead we mostly get stuck
Yuri huh instead we mostly get stuck with companions that are irritating
with companions that are irritating
with companions that are irritating unhelpful and share way too much
unhelpful and share way too much
unhelpful and share way too much information Master Liang did you know
information Master Liang did you know
information Master Liang did you know that your long hearts yeah I heard that
that your long hearts yeah I heard that
that your long hearts yeah I heard that beeping that was me I was beeping to let
beeping that was me I was beeping to let
beeping that was me I was beeping to let you know about the beeping that’s
you know about the beeping that’s
you know about the beeping that’s particularly infuriating when an AI
particularly infuriating when an AI
particularly infuriating when an AI character is constantly getting into
character is constantly getting into
character is constantly getting into trouble or you have to rescue them all
trouble or you have to rescue them all
trouble or you have to rescue them all we want to do is slap these characters
we want to do is slap these characters
we want to do is slap these characters across the face and tell them to shut up
across the face and tell them to shut up
across the face and tell them to shut up already but the players are forced to be
already but the players are forced to be
already but the players are forced to be polite
polite
polite God just save Zelda with my friggin
God just save Zelda with my friggin
God just save Zelda with my friggin slingshot
slingshot
slingshot did you know boots go on feet yeah
did you know boots go on feet yeah
did you know boots go on feet yeah that’s uh that’s great we’re not sure
that’s uh that’s great we’re not sure
that’s uh that’s great we’re not sure how link puts up with the likes of Navi
how link puts up with the likes of Navi
how link puts up with the likes of Navi and fee but his ability to stay cool
and fee but his ability to stay cool
and fee but his ability to stay cool clearly makes him a saint
number four climb over small objects
number four climb over small objects wait a second I forgot my wallet don’t
wait a second I forgot my wallet don’t
wait a second I forgot my wallet don’t you just hate it when you’re so close
you just hate it when you’re so close
you just hate it when you’re so close yet so far in many video games you’ll
yet so far in many video games you’ll
yet so far in many video games you’ll find yourself mere inches away from
find yourself mere inches away from
find yourself mere inches away from achieving your objective all you have to
achieving your objective all you have to
achieving your objective all you have to do is climb over that small object
do is climb over that small object
do is climb over that small object you’re gonna run something else you can
you’re gonna run something else you can
you’re gonna run something else you can do here this would be easy enough if
do here this would be easy enough if
do here this would be easy enough if your character were capable of jumping
your character were capable of jumping
your character were capable of jumping or grabbing onto ledges these characters
or grabbing onto ledges these characters
or grabbing onto ledges these characters generally like to do everything the long
generally like to do everything the long
generally like to do everything the long hard way with no room for shortcuts keep
hard way with no room for shortcuts keep
hard way with no room for shortcuts keep going friend that station was rated but
going friend that station was rated but
going friend that station was rated but there’s others up ahead it’s too bad you
there’s others up ahead it’s too bad you
there’s others up ahead it’s too bad you can’t fit a forklift in your inventory
can’t fit a forklift in your inventory
can’t fit a forklift in your inventory you will never get over a Ledge it’s
you will never get over a Ledge it’s
you will never get over a Ledge it’s impossible number three
impossible number three
impossible number three talk so you’re the new kid everyone is
talk so you’re the new kid everyone is
talk so you’re the new kid everyone is talking about what’s your name
talking about what’s your name
talking about what’s your name he doesn’t talk out King he thinks he’s
he doesn’t talk out King he thinks he’s
he doesn’t talk out King he thinks he’s hot shit or something Gordon Freeman is
hot shit or something Gordon Freeman is
hot shit or something Gordon Freeman is a man a few words link is a man a few
a man a few words link is a man a few
a man a few words link is a man a few grunts and Chell solely communicates
grunts and Chell solely communicates
grunts and Chell solely communicates through body language not that we can
through body language not that we can
through body language not that we can see it or nothing okay what you’re doing
see it or nothing okay what you’re doing
see it or nothing okay what you’re doing there is jumping you just she just
there is jumping you just she just
there is jumping you just she just jumped the point is that none of these
jumped the point is that none of these
jumped the point is that none of these video game characters are cut out for
video game characters are cut out for
video game characters are cut out for careers in public speaking
careers in public speaking
careers in public speaking Rick could you repeat that please
Rick could you repeat that please
Rick could you repeat that please given their extraordinary circumstances
given their extraordinary circumstances
given their extraordinary circumstances you’d think that they would have
you’d think that they would have
you’d think that they would have something interesting to say every once
something interesting to say every once
something interesting to say every once in a while what are your name I’m next
then again maybe not all video game
then again maybe not all video game characters were meant to speak remember
characters were meant to speak remember
characters were meant to speak remember what happened when Samus finally opened
what happened when Samus finally opened
what happened when Samus finally opened her mouth in Metroid Other M the word he
her mouth in Metroid Other M the word he
her mouth in Metroid Other M the word he so obviously chose outsider pierced my
so obviously chose outsider pierced my
so obviously chose outsider pierced my heart
heart
heart number two touch most things I mean
number two touch most things I mean
number two touch most things I mean you’re all trained killers some of you
you’re all trained killers some of you
you’re all trained killers some of you can kill with one touch one touch this
can kill with one touch one touch this
can kill with one touch one touch this is such an old mechanic that most people
is such an old mechanic that most people
is such an old mechanic that most people never question it anymore but it seems
never question it anymore but it seems
never question it anymore but it seems kind of odd when you think about it now
kind of odd when you think about it now
kind of odd when you think about it now I’m sure that a Kremlin could do some
I’m sure that a Kremlin could do some
I’m sure that a Kremlin could do some serious damage to a monkey but they’d
serious damage to a monkey but they’d
serious damage to a monkey but they’d actually have to bite him first I assume
and how is it that Mario gets ko’d by a
and how is it that Mario gets ko’d by a Goomba you kill it by jumping on its
Goomba you kill it by jumping on its
Goomba you kill it by jumping on its head but you touch one pixel of its side
head but you touch one pixel of its side
head but you touch one pixel of its side and it’s game over for you plumber boy
seriously though Mega Man can kick the
seriously though Mega Man can kick the crap out of a handful of robot masters
crap out of a handful of robot masters
crap out of a handful of robot masters but those spikes are a no-go
but those spikes are a no-go
but those spikes are a no-go even if you just brush them with your
even if you just brush them with your
even if you just brush them with your arm what the heck is with you guys if
arm what the heck is with you guys if
arm what the heck is with you guys if the intruder can stand on your head even
the intruder can stand on your head even
the intruder can stand on your head even if he has to freeze you first do not
if he has to freeze you first do not
if he has to freeze you first do not hover over pits that are too large for
hover over pits that are too large for
hover over pits that are too large for him to jump over we make those pits big
him to jump over we make those pits big
him to jump over we make those pits big for a reason before we get to our number
for a reason before we get to our number
for a reason before we get to our number one pick here are a few honorable
one pick here are a few honorable
one pick here are a few honorable mentions
number one swim even open-world games
number one swim even open-world games such as Grand Theft Auto and Assassin’s
such as Grand Theft Auto and Assassin’s
such as Grand Theft Auto and Assassin’s Creed keep the characters restricted to
Creed keep the characters restricted to
Creed keep the characters restricted to certain areas often game developers
certain areas often game developers
certain areas often game developers contain these characters by surrounding
contain these characters by surrounding
contain these characters by surrounding them with a deadliest substance known to
them with a deadliest substance known to
them with a deadliest substance known to man water
man water
man water the idea that trained killers like tommy
the idea that trained killers like tommy
the idea that trained killers like tommy vercetti or al tiger can’t swim is one
vercetti or al tiger can’t swim is one
vercetti or al tiger can’t swim is one thing but you honestly expect us to
thing but you honestly expect us to
thing but you honestly expect us to believe that the Teenage Mutant Ninja
believe that the Teenage Mutant Ninja
believe that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and frog can’t survive in water
Turtles and frog can’t survive in water
Turtles and frog can’t survive in water we can accept a lot of mind-boggling
we can accept a lot of mind-boggling
we can accept a lot of mind-boggling things and video games but this is kind
things and video games but this is kind
things and video games but this is kind of going off the deep end do you agree
of going off the deep end do you agree
of going off the deep end do you agree with our list you’re playing for the
with our list you’re playing for the
with our list you’re playing for the wrong side dude
wrong side dude
wrong side dude what other mundane tasks are badass
what other mundane tasks are badass
what other mundane tasks are badass video game characters incapable of
video game characters incapable of
video game characters incapable of performing for more entertaining top 10s
performing for more entertaining top 10s
performing for more entertaining top 10s published every day be sure to subscribe
published every day be sure to subscribe
published every day be sure to subscribe to watchmojo.com and finally if you
to watchmojo.com and finally if you
to watchmojo.com and finally if you begin to wonder if your choices are
begin to wonder if your choices are
begin to wonder if your choices are actually meaningful and whether you’ll
actually meaningful and whether you’ll
actually meaningful and whether you’ll ever make a significant contribution to
ever make a significant contribution to
ever make a significant contribution to the world just remember that in the vast
the world just remember that in the vast
the world just remember that in the vast infinite nough subspace your thoughts
infinite nough subspace your thoughts
infinite nough subspace your thoughts and problems are materially
and problems are materially
and problems are materially insignificant
”
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