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Top 10 Signs You’re a Hipster


these are the ironic realities of so

these are the ironic realities of so many modern-day Millennials welcome to

many modern-day Millennials welcome to

many modern-day Millennials welcome to watchmojo.com and today we’re counting

watchmojo.com and today we’re counting

watchmojo.com and today we’re counting down our picks for the top ten signs

down our picks for the top ten signs

down our picks for the top ten signs that you’re a hipster the drink you just

that you’re a hipster the drink you just

that you’re a hipster the drink you just ask for doesn’t exist no it does like

ask for doesn’t exist no it does like

ask for doesn’t exist no it does like you can order it at Starbucks am i

you can order it at Starbucks am i

you can order it at Starbucks am i wearing a green apron doing here ray

wearing a green apron doing here ray

wearing a green apron doing here ray lamontagne playing right now for this

lamontagne playing right now for this

lamontagne playing right now for this list we’ll be looking at behaviors

list we’ll be looking at behaviors

list we’ll be looking at behaviors preferences tendencies interests and so

preferences tendencies interests and so

preferences tendencies interests and so forth

forth

forth that signal that you just made be a

that signal that you just made be a

that signal that you just made be a hipster yeah I’ll meet you at the

hipster yeah I’ll meet you at the

hipster yeah I’ll meet you at the abandoned warehouse tonight it’s just

abandoned warehouse tonight it’s just

abandoned warehouse tonight it’s just one of the entries on our list make you

one of the entries on our list make you

one of the entries on our list make you a hipster no but when viewed as a whole

a hipster no but when viewed as a whole

a hipster no but when viewed as a whole you may notice a shocking truth for the

you may notice a shocking truth for the

you may notice a shocking truth for the record this is not meant to offend or to

record this is not meant to offend or to

record this is not meant to offend or to be taken seriously it’s all in good fun

be taken seriously it’s all in good fun

be taken seriously it’s all in good fun I was reading Catcher in the Rye and I

I was reading Catcher in the Rye and I

I was reading Catcher in the Rye and I realized like I am holding Caulfield can

realized like I am holding Caulfield can

realized like I am holding Caulfield can I borrow a dollar number ten you

I borrow a dollar number ten you

I borrow a dollar number ten you frequent independent local coffee houses

frequent independent local coffee houses

frequent independent local coffee houses welcome thank you for coming to the

welcome thank you for coming to the

welcome thank you for coming to the meeting of baristas and coffee shop

meeting of baristas and coffee shop

meeting of baristas and coffee shop workers throughout the city we hereby

workers throughout the city we hereby

workers throughout the city we hereby begin a manifesto against customers and

begin a manifesto against customers and

begin a manifesto against customers and management hipsters love them some

management hipsters love them some

management hipsters love them some coffee and they despise you and your

coffee and they despise you and your

coffee and they despise you and your 99-cent brew from the gas station yeah

99-cent brew from the gas station yeah

99-cent brew from the gas station yeah this is Malaysian bat guano coffee it’s

this is Malaysian bat guano coffee it’s

this is Malaysian bat guano coffee it’s extremely rare this bean was shot out of

extremely rare this bean was shot out of

extremely rare this bean was shot out of a bats asshole

a bats asshole

a bats asshole they will openly express concern for

they will openly express concern for

they will openly express concern for your Java selections at the local indie

your Java selections at the local indie

your Java selections at the local indie coffee shop also known as the hipsters

coffee shop also known as the hipsters

coffee shop also known as the hipsters gym where they can flex their

gym where they can flex their

gym where they can flex their intellectual muscles by spouting the

intellectual muscles by spouting the

intellectual muscles by spouting the latest theories all the while keeping an

latest theories all the while keeping an

latest theories all the while keeping an eye on the coffee enthusiasts that come

eye on the coffee enthusiasts that come

eye on the coffee enthusiasts that come and go from their favorite spot dude

and go from their favorite spot dude

and go from their favorite spot dude behind the counters got a tight t-shirt

behind the counters got a tight t-shirt

behind the counters got a tight t-shirt in a ponytail ease of use and then

in a ponytail ease of use and then

in a ponytail ease of use and then and I was like hey can I get a

and I was like hey can I get a

and I was like hey can I get a cappuccino he’s like yeah right on

cappuccino he’s like yeah right on

cappuccino he’s like yeah right on generally like the independent coffee

generally like the independent coffee

generally like the independent coffee house allows for a super relaxing break

house allows for a super relaxing break

house allows for a super relaxing break from reality but sadly many hipsters

from reality but sadly many hipsters

from reality but sadly many hipsters only fuel their anxieties at the coffee

only fuel their anxieties at the coffee

only fuel their anxieties at the coffee shop making them all the more likely to

shop making them all the more likely to

shop making them all the more likely to voice their grievances elsewhere

whatever go ahead look like everybody

whatever go ahead look like everybody else and every other coffee shop apron

else and every other coffee shop apron

else and every other coffee shop apron boy number nine you live in a hipster

boy number nine you live in a hipster

boy number nine you live in a hipster centric town

centric town

centric town yes Portland Oregon was deemed to be the

yes Portland Oregon was deemed to be the

yes Portland Oregon was deemed to be the most hip by Movado calm Brooklyn

most hip by Movado calm Brooklyn

most hip by Movado calm Brooklyn Minneapolis Austin Portland these cities

Minneapolis Austin Portland these cities

Minneapolis Austin Portland these cities represent the trail of the millennial

represent the trail of the millennial

represent the trail of the millennial hipster exchange in the u.s. at least

hipster exchange in the u.s. at least

hipster exchange in the u.s. at least one of your hipster friends made the

one of your hipster friends made the

one of your hipster friends made the professional move to one of the big four

professional move to one of the big four

professional move to one of the big four do you want to donate to my organic

do you want to donate to my organic

do you want to donate to my organic vegetable garden get mainstreamer but

vegetable garden get mainstreamer but

vegetable garden get mainstreamer but even if he or she absolutely loves his

even if he or she absolutely loves his

even if he or she absolutely loves his or her new hipster friendly City you’ve

or her new hipster friendly City you’ve

or her new hipster friendly City you’ve probably heard him or her mention a

probably heard him or her mention a

probably heard him or her mention a possible relocation depending on which

possible relocation depending on which

possible relocation depending on which city now seems to be the most trendy

city now seems to be the most trendy

city now seems to be the most trendy among hipsters who by the way totally

among hipsters who by the way totally

among hipsters who by the way totally don’t pay attention to that stuff let’s

don’t pay attention to that stuff let’s

don’t pay attention to that stuff let’s watch them now and then natural habitat

watch them now and then natural habitat

watch them now and then natural habitat oh I wonder if they have a vegan menu

oh I wonder if they have a vegan menu

oh I wonder if they have a vegan menu for the serious hipster Brooklyn

for the serious hipster Brooklyn

for the serious hipster Brooklyn represents a rite of passage but who

represents a rite of passage but who

represents a rite of passage but who knows where the next hot spot will be

knows where the next hot spot will be

knows where the next hot spot will be Hopkins Minnesota Chattanooga Tennessee

Hopkins Minnesota Chattanooga Tennessee

Hopkins Minnesota Chattanooga Tennessee Moose Jaw it’s really laid-back really

Moose Jaw it’s really laid-back really

Moose Jaw it’s really laid-back really really cool place to hang out everybody

really cool place to hang out everybody

really cool place to hang out everybody just kind of likes the vibe number eight

just kind of likes the vibe number eight

just kind of likes the vibe number eight you have a strong interest in handmade

you have a strong interest in handmade

you have a strong interest in handmade independent and craft things I will not

independent and craft things I will not

independent and craft things I will not sell a single piece of firewood until it

sell a single piece of firewood until it

sell a single piece of firewood until it is absolutely ready I don’t care how

is absolutely ready I don’t care how

is absolutely ready I don’t care how long that takes

long that takes

long that takes regardless of a hipsters maturity level

regardless of a hipsters maturity level

regardless of a hipsters maturity level it’s always important to establish one’s

it’s always important to establish one’s

it’s always important to establish one’s independence by expressing intense

independence by expressing intense

independence by expressing intense devotion to at least one specific art

devotion to at least one specific art

devotion to at least one specific art form and preferably many artisanally

form and preferably many artisanally

form and preferably many artisanally crafted toilet paper

crafted toilet paper

crafted toilet paper and pulped and hand perforated the way

and pulped and hand perforated the way

and pulped and hand perforated the way toilet paper used to be some hipsters

toilet paper used to be some hipsters

toilet paper used to be some hipsters have long supported their favorite indie

have long supported their favorite indie

have long supported their favorite indie band

others need some time to fully

others need some time to fully transition into the person that never

transition into the person that never

transition into the person that never shuts up about everything handmade

shuts up about everything handmade

shuts up about everything handmade whether it’s at the local coffee house

whether it’s at the local coffee house

whether it’s at the local coffee house or perhaps the latest local microbrewery

or perhaps the latest local microbrewery

or perhaps the latest local microbrewery where you’ll be forced into some day

where you’ll be forced into some day

where you’ll be forced into some day drinking while learning about every band

drinking while learning about every band

drinking while learning about every band that will be playing within walking

that will be playing within walking

that will be playing within walking distance that week

we come right

we come right number seven you collect records and

number seven you collect records and

number seven you collect records and other antiquities I am getting very

other antiquities I am getting very

other antiquities I am getting very stressed out though the head of our

stressed out though the head of our

stressed out though the head of our school does not know about noise these

school does not know about noise these

school does not know about noise these are the people teaching our kids oh you

are the people teaching our kids oh you

are the people teaching our kids oh you download mp3s and listen to Spotify Oh

download mp3s and listen to Spotify Oh

download mp3s and listen to Spotify Oh while it’s not yet possible to

while it’s not yet possible to

while it’s not yet possible to physically time travel

physically time travel

physically time travel don’t tell a hipster that so piece of

don’t tell a hipster that so piece of

don’t tell a hipster that so piece of crap doesn’t work why because he or she

crap doesn’t work why because he or she

crap doesn’t work why because he or she somehow knows everything about the vinyl

somehow knows everything about the vinyl

somehow knows everything about the vinyl age due to endless hours of roaming

age due to endless hours of roaming

age due to endless hours of roaming about record stores and posturing as if

about record stores and posturing as if

about record stores and posturing as if we were back in those days it’s like I

we were back in those days it’s like I

we were back in those days it’s like I don’t even know Arcade Fire anymore and

don’t even know Arcade Fire anymore and

don’t even know Arcade Fire anymore and not at a time when it’s socially

not at a time when it’s socially

not at a time when it’s socially acceptable to mumble and stare at your

acceptable to mumble and stare at your

acceptable to mumble and stare at your phone while in conversation with another

phone while in conversation with another

phone while in conversation with another human being the hipster always has at

human being the hipster always has at

human being the hipster always has at least one vintage accessory on hand

least one vintage accessory on hand

least one vintage accessory on hand usually a camera and while it may be

usually a camera and while it may be

usually a camera and while it may be digital it still has the feel and the

digital it still has the feel and the

digital it still has the feel and the look of something from the past

number six you own a fixed-gear bike or

number six you own a fixed-gear bike or a unicycle working all right you go

a unicycle working all right you go

a unicycle working all right you go right go right go on a fight on a bike

right go right go on a fight on a bike

right go right go on a fight on a bike I’m gonna buy in a turn gonna tell me my

I’m gonna buy in a turn gonna tell me my

I’m gonna buy in a turn gonna tell me my job bike bike bike bike if you’re a

job bike bike bike bike if you’re a

job bike bike bike bike if you’re a modern day hipster you’re likely living

modern day hipster you’re likely living

modern day hipster you’re likely living in a hipster neighborhood riding to and

in a hipster neighborhood riding to and

in a hipster neighborhood riding to and fro on some type of fixed-gear bicycle

fro on some type of fixed-gear bicycle

fro on some type of fixed-gear bicycle to cruise around town do you bike for

to cruise around town do you bike for

to cruise around town do you bike for exercise no of course you don’t bike for

exercise no of course you don’t bike for

exercise no of course you don’t bike for car do you bike to promote your personal

car do you bike to promote your personal

car do you bike to promote your personal brand and the whole package you got

brand and the whole package you got

brand and the whole package you got going on and if you’re really on top of

going on and if you’re really on top of

going on and if you’re really on top of your game then you own yourself a

your game then you own yourself a

your game then you own yourself a unicycle

unicycle

unicycle which obviously draws attention and

which obviously draws attention and

which obviously draws attention and further strengthens the identity you

further strengthens the identity you

further strengthens the identity you crave alright I get this whole way be

crave alright I get this whole way be

crave alright I get this whole way be rule or against a lot mp8 birds there’s

rule or against a lot mp8 birds there’s

rule or against a lot mp8 birds there’s a little bikes number five you wear

a little bikes number five you wear

a little bikes number five you wear thick horn-rimmed glasses that’s how you

thick horn-rimmed glasses that’s how you

thick horn-rimmed glasses that’s how you turn aerial into hipster Ariel

turn aerial into hipster Ariel

turn aerial into hipster Ariel here’s another essential component of

here’s another essential component of

here’s another essential component of the hipster branding package a pair of

the hipster branding package a pair of

the hipster branding package a pair of large black specks that allow for

large black specks that allow for

large black specks that allow for versatility in conversation even if you

versatility in conversation even if you

versatility in conversation even if you don’t actually need them you just rock

don’t actually need them you just rock

don’t actually need them you just rock massive horn rimmed specs because of the

massive horn rimmed specs because of the

massive horn rimmed specs because of the intellectual vibe and because they make

intellectual vibe and because they make

intellectual vibe and because they make you more interesting – whether you’ve

you more interesting – whether you’ve

you more interesting – whether you’ve got them propped down low on your nose

got them propped down low on your nose

got them propped down low on your nose or if you’re someone that likes to stick

or if you’re someone that likes to stick

or if you’re someone that likes to stick your nose in the air during a tense

your nose in the air during a tense

your nose in the air during a tense verbal battle on some ridiculously

verbal battle on some ridiculously

verbal battle on some ridiculously subjective topic they just provide a

subjective topic they just provide a

subjective topic they just provide a little extra Flair and somehow bring

little extra Flair and somehow bring

little extra Flair and somehow bring more weight to your words as adult

more weight to your words as adult

more weight to your words as adult education is a wonderful thing you meet

education is a wonderful thing you meet

education is a wonderful thing you meet a lot of interesting professors you know

a lot of interesting professors you know

a lot of interesting professors you know it’s stimulating number four you can’t

it’s stimulating number four you can’t

it’s stimulating number four you can’t speak honestly without sarcastic humor

speak honestly without sarcastic humor

speak honestly without sarcastic humor oh guy he’s cool are you being sarcastic

oh guy he’s cool are you being sarcastic

oh guy he’s cool are you being sarcastic dude I don’t even know anymore now this

dude I don’t even know anymore now this

dude I don’t even know anymore now this is what you call a paradox a seemingly

is what you call a paradox a seemingly

is what you call a paradox a seemingly gentle hipster individual that exudes a

gentle hipster individual that exudes a

gentle hipster individual that exudes a quiet rage with masked sarcastic humor

quiet rage with masked sarcastic humor

quiet rage with masked sarcastic humor despite knowing that you’re in the

despite knowing that you’re in the

despite knowing that you’re in the actual presence of a hipster it still

actual presence of a hipster it still

actual presence of a hipster it still might take the basic individual a few

might take the basic individual a few

might take the basic individual a few seconds just to process that you’re

seconds just to process that you’re

seconds just to process that you’re actually being patronized or at the

actually being patronized or at the

actually being patronized or at the receiving end of a passive-aggressive

receiving end of a passive-aggressive

receiving end of a passive-aggressive tongue lashing omona I like your outfit

tongue lashing omona I like your outfit

tongue lashing omona I like your outfit affordable the sarcastic hipster is one

affordable the sarcastic hipster is one

affordable the sarcastic hipster is one that likes to remind of his or her

that likes to remind of his or her

that likes to remind of his or her affinity for sarcasm as if we didn’t

affinity for sarcasm as if we didn’t

affinity for sarcasm as if we didn’t already know

already know

already know of it yet they still think it’s cute and

of it yet they still think it’s cute and

of it yet they still think it’s cute and quirky and not at all predictable and

quirky and not at all predictable and

quirky and not at all predictable and boring actually I’ve come around on

boring actually I’ve come around on

boring actually I’ve come around on hipsters takes a lot of guts to all wear

hipsters takes a lot of guts to all wear

hipsters takes a lot of guts to all wear the same head number three you have a

the same head number three you have a

the same head number three you have a beard mustache or longish hair all right

beard mustache or longish hair all right

beard mustache or longish hair all right a lot of hair there don’t you think we

a lot of hair there don’t you think we

a lot of hair there don’t you think we are saying hipster all right at this

are saying hipster all right at this

are saying hipster all right at this very moment one of you is in the process

very moment one of you is in the process

very moment one of you is in the process of growing out a sprawling beard but

of growing out a sprawling beard but

of growing out a sprawling beard but it’s not for warmth on the high seas

it’s not for warmth on the high seas

it’s not for warmth on the high seas it’s because you think it looks cool

it’s because you think it looks cool

it’s because you think it looks cool because it makes you look like yes a

because it makes you look like yes a

because it makes you look like yes a classic hipster you just don’t see buzz

classic hipster you just don’t see buzz

classic hipster you just don’t see buzz cut it and baby-faced hipsters aside

cut it and baby-faced hipsters aside

cut it and baby-faced hipsters aside from the glasses in the hats number one

from the glasses in the hats number one

from the glasses in the hats number one beards mustaches there’s no matter what

beards mustaches there’s no matter what

beards mustaches there’s no matter what style hipster 101 instead hipsters favor

style hipster 101 instead hipsters favor

style hipster 101 instead hipsters favor a pairing of long messy tresses with an

a pairing of long messy tresses with an

a pairing of long messy tresses with an aggressive patch of facial hair groomed

aggressive patch of facial hair groomed

aggressive patch of facial hair groomed oh so carefully into that just woke up

oh so carefully into that just woke up

oh so carefully into that just woke up and couldn’t care less about their

and couldn’t care less about their

and couldn’t care less about their appearance look it’s an irony so deep

appearance look it’s an irony so deep

appearance look it’s an irony so deep even the ironic are not aware of just

even the ironic are not aware of just

even the ironic are not aware of just how ironic it truly is ironically I love

how ironic it truly is ironically I love

how ironic it truly is ironically I love to see what you look like without your

to see what you look like without your

to see what you look like without your beard well I could stop hiding your real

beard well I could stop hiding your real

beard well I could stop hiding your real cow number two you wear plaid shirts

cow number two you wear plaid shirts

cow number two you wear plaid shirts tight jeans and ironic t-shirts

it’s the trifecta of absolute hipster

it’s the trifecta of absolute hipster dumb flattop skinny jeans and that

dumb flattop skinny jeans and that

dumb flattop skinny jeans and that clever tee that immediately makes a bold

clever tee that immediately makes a bold

clever tee that immediately makes a bold statement about your intellectual

statement about your intellectual

statement about your intellectual prowess I actually just finished a

prowess I actually just finished a

prowess I actually just finished a lengthy dissertation on this exact topic

lengthy dissertation on this exact topic

lengthy dissertation on this exact topic just last night how do you bang out

just last night how do you bang out

just last night how do you bang out these topical discourses so quickly

these topical discourses so quickly

these topical discourses so quickly Oliver it is impressive if you’ve

Oliver it is impressive if you’ve

Oliver it is impressive if you’ve actually squeezed your body into a pair

actually squeezed your body into a pair

actually squeezed your body into a pair of skinny jeans regardless of your

of skinny jeans regardless of your

of skinny jeans regardless of your actual size or shape then you have

actual size or shape then you have

actual size or shape then you have hipster tendencies it’s like I wish

hipster tendencies it’s like I wish

hipster tendencies it’s like I wish there were more pants where you know

there were more pants where you know

there were more pants where you know where there aren’t and if you’re already

where there aren’t and if you’re already

where there aren’t and if you’re already known for wearing a plethora of plaid

known for wearing a plethora of plaid

known for wearing a plethora of plaid tops well you’re either wearing the

tops well you’re either wearing the

tops well you’re either wearing the uniform of hipsters or are a lumberjack

uniform of hipsters or are a lumberjack

uniform of hipsters or are a lumberjack which is okay skews why are you wearing

which is okay skews why are you wearing

which is okay skews why are you wearing skinny jeans because they’re hip it

skinny jeans because they’re hip it

skinny jeans because they’re hip it doesn’t really matter if you go shopping

doesn’t really matter if you go shopping

doesn’t really matter if you go shopping alone at the thrift shop either because

alone at the thrift shop either because

alone at the thrift shop either because your physical presence in such a store

your physical presence in such a store

your physical presence in such a store ads to your obvious hipster vibe no no

ads to your obvious hipster vibe no no

ads to your obvious hipster vibe no no no I’m not a hipster at all

no I’m not a hipster at all

no I’m not a hipster at all yeah you do seem to hate a lot of things

yeah you do seem to hate a lot of things

yeah you do seem to hate a lot of things and the bottom of your pants are awful

and the bottom of your pants are awful

and the bottom of your pants are awful tight you know I just I don’t like Los

tight you know I just I don’t like Los

tight you know I just I don’t like Los Angeles that’s the it doesn’t make me a

Angeles that’s the it doesn’t make me a

Angeles that’s the it doesn’t make me a hipster before we unveil our number one

hipster before we unveil our number one

hipster before we unveil our number one pick here are some honorable mentions

pick here are some honorable mentions

pick here are some honorable mentions these are all technically Oxford shoes

these are all technically Oxford shoes

these are all technically Oxford shoes right here but thus broguing is the

right here but thus broguing is the

right here but thus broguing is the style that’s on top of all of

you’re not a hipster no oh my god no out

you’re not a hipster no oh my god no out we hope that we’re building equity in a

we hope that we’re building equity in a

we hope that we’re building equity in a company that will be worth hopefully

company that will be worth hopefully

company that will be worth hopefully more in the future

more in the future

more in the future number one you hate the mainstream

Rage Against the Machine rage against it

Rage Against the Machine rage against it that’s right you know about the Black

that’s right you know about the Black

that’s right you know about the Black Keys and the white stripes before they

Keys and the white stripes before they

Keys and the white stripes before they were staples of pop culture but now you

were staples of pop culture but now you

were staples of pop culture but now you just despise them based mainly on the

just despise them based mainly on the

just despise them based mainly on the fact that less informed individuals

fact that less informed individuals

fact that less informed individuals invaded your musical space you’re also

invaded your musical space you’re also

invaded your musical space you’re also just a little bit smarter than most when

just a little bit smarter than most when

just a little bit smarter than most when it comes to the arts and living a

it comes to the arts and living a

it comes to the arts and living a fruitful life in general and you’ve got

fruitful life in general and you’ve got

fruitful life in general and you’ve got at least one issue that’s deeply

at least one issue that’s deeply

at least one issue that’s deeply important to you right now but

important to you right now but

important to you right now but unfortunately won’t be important enough

unfortunately won’t be important enough

unfortunately won’t be important enough next year when life changes a bit and it

next year when life changes a bit and it

next year when life changes a bit and it starts becoming the cool thing to do you

starts becoming the cool thing to do you

starts becoming the cool thing to do you hate the mainstream but you still need

hate the mainstream but you still need

hate the mainstream but you still need it if only to hate it but how can I be a

it if only to hate it but how can I be a

it if only to hate it but how can I be a nonconformist and I’m still conforming

nonconformist and I’m still conforming

nonconformist and I’m still conforming exactly do you agree with our list what

exactly do you agree with our list what

exactly do you agree with our list what do you think defines a hipster look at

do you think defines a hipster look at

do you think defines a hipster look at these peasants

these peasants

these peasants I’ll make this into an ironic t-shirt

I’ll make this into an ironic t-shirt

I’ll make this into an ironic t-shirt for more hip top 10s published every day

for more hip top 10s published every day

for more hip top 10s published every day be sure to subscribe to watchmojo.com

be sure to subscribe to watchmojo.com

be sure to subscribe to watchmojo.com great story man

”

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