I am betrayed
nicolas müller that’s hard
deny and I’m 35 years old and
am currently in the first line of hope
that I do not have an open trouser stall
or somehow you could you
to verify that for a short time is very
beautiful as excellent the worst
nightmare at all why am I here
I’m not here for wisdom
I can not spread that I am
lend i’m leyen all that i do
and I am new to what I am to you
I would like to tell you now
I have been terribly ill for ten years
in those ten years, I was like
a 101 talk show presenter once upon a time
announced popstar so his job was
popstar was the original wording and me
had to quarrel with myself
many moments
but that was not the job we will
if we come to the point then it is
we all the same and I think so
important because it does not matter if you are
in front of tens of thousands of people on one
stage stands and sinks that is not
important if you are in the bakery
or mature assembled or ill cared for
whatever job it is easy
a kind of disease that affects each of us
can infest
we have ten million people in
Germany are the angst gang
dark figure deducted ten million
of which too many shame afflict
are and this is what I am all about tonight
for the loss of shame the losses
so do not hurt
Of course I would like to do that
but keep upright
Shame’s loss of shame
whether this illness is mine
incredibly important and therefore how
There is no wisdom, however
actually only too human everyone
At least one of them knows about you
Everybody has to fight this problem
you might be concerned about that
quite a bit in the version too
bring a little to explain
What I am really about is me
had a scare disease one
generalized anxiety disorders there
sitting permanently permanently sits a few
eyes in the neck and watching you and
I had panic attacks well over 1000
I did not count them because of that
would be very laborious and idle
panic attacks lead to ingratiate
panic attacks cause symptoms like
heart racing they cause increased
blood pressure sweats vertigo
total loss of reality because the
reality as such on you
falls in because you all too much
sharp perceives and that gives
sometime so 1 3 someday you know
not exactly what you actually exactly
and that is the moment in that
then in doubt, the ambulance
The whole thing started when I started
my mother died
shortly after my grandmother died
is something like my second mother
was the one who raised me i sat in the
Church and suddenly it started
I had this heart racing I had
but this death sensation no
Deadly longing actually had
experienced too much death and that has me
that’s a hypochondriac
another part of me that is one
Another part of the normal as normal
is how it can be because it is
the purest humanity is I had
afraid to die
the moment I look at it
that my mother died i was sitting
in the church and I would not
make it so dramatic and it became
excuse me French shit
in a moment that was not
beautiful
Therefore , a fear from this book
andri in front of my heart
I feel that often enough right now
not that speaks lead for one
excellent audience but I play
that often enough that my heart does things
which I think is strange and the
fact that I’m scared of a madman
I was like cancer the other day
to do it that way I’m a father
three and a half year old daughter and mine
the biggest wish is to experience what they are
someday if she does that
i did when i was in her age
was
I would like to see what the people are
with 21 for a buck mist builds up
Let’s do it together and and
Accordingly, I respect a bit
on my health and was with the doctor
and had me examined routinely
He has me to the nearest doctor
sent me also routinely
has examined and then cancer
stated
cancer on the kidney you only need one
okay, we’ll give it off but cancer on the
kidney that could cause the end
that my hormones I already
Shoot your heart out okay
on continuous fire
that could be the then there was a row
there were a number of studies
Tests of samples and then a week
a week of waiting if you want to go
that understands what you are afraid of
The sick one is waiting for a week
then expire at least a year
felt if not even two the week
expands into infinity and
eventually at some point the call came that
everything is benign that that’s ok that
he kind of grows that for now
and there is something sitting on the twins
kidney but let’s watch that
and if it gets too big we will
It never went away that was one
incredible relief and then I am
I went home I was straight
Just when shopping as me the
receive a call and accordingly
happy I went home
thought about what actually the
reason for that was that I was in the whole
not a single panic attack
It was earlier that I was with it
hence the blood pressure cuff as
Accessoire was gone through life
I was always afraid to die because
I always somehow on a monitor
wanted to be visible and have all that
I did not do that in a week and that
was the moment and and I want now
not here
I’m not at all about being there
and to my history and my
biography I am 35 years old I have ‘
I still want at least 50 years
Biography of Iran but I was fine
because that the sense question you me
I’ve got the biggest ones
I was ever asked why
did you really can
Panic attacks currently and I can
tell you it was the middle
It was the middle in which I was
and I do not want the next schpakow
who preaches the middle because the
middle is so flexible the middle has so
a bit of justitia man one
takes weight out here and it lies there
in and then sometime it is flat and
skis and everything is fine
sometimes you just have to
Take weight and throw it in somewhere
because just not enough is there
middle is variable the middle shifts
permanent permanent shifts
the middle but please if I have a please
you can use it uses it
since the moment in which it sad
to be sad since you are aware
and be warned that everyone is human
every time the saddest person
the world can be
and be aware that everyone is human
always the happiest person
the world can be and then take that
both cornerstones and pushes them to
Dissatisfaction together and I believe
that’s the middle and that does not matter where it is
the center is where you are in
respective moment belongs and that is
that stands for me and that
maybe not so at wikipedia
that’s what catalis has to do for me
means I find the fact that that
is that it gives people smart body
they just say it’s just normal
yes you can also in five minutes
go down the street and then off the truck
to be run over yes it really completely
right there you have there you are right and
I’ve never heard that either
thank you for the knowledge but
maybe we should also about it
think that I theoretically in just
upset this second and be dead
The odds could be fifty-fifty
the chances to survive and to
die stand for us all and have there
I have no insight into biographies and
I do not want to be disrespectful though
they are for everyone
time 50 50
Something can always be going on something
can always go something can always
Something can always burst in you
send direction roccos and with this
I have knowledge for a week
had cancer and have about it
thought what that with my
mother did something with my grandma
did that with old friends
I’ve met
would have to experience this in time
satisfaction
Satisfaction is so much bigger than
Good luck is a temporary one
luck is what you are
makes when he smacks first to me
that ‘s when it’s the first time
hugging and maybe the second
and for the third time and if you
really lucky then you have in
but future happiness do yourself the
I do not want that as a
say preacher as I said I am me
am a long-time professional tour through the fallen
and do not look for your middle and that is
crazy because everyone says you have to do yours
find middle
that does not exist that exists
really not I was looking for her
For years she does not exist for what
exists is the moment and the moment
and now it’s going to be wise
what counts and not much more I will
in this moment with absolute
100% confidence
how my daughter throws her abi because
she helped in with wanderzirkus
I definitely will be in
this moment at least 90 years old
I will not fucking shit in me
wear but will someday
forget or let it operate
since what he could be at the end
we can all do our best
and I think there is more fatalism
there is no such thing in the world
I already announced I can
no wisdom distributes it all
Did you know but I can find something
important is that you look
in between times and says hey
but that’s exactly how it is
Thank you for a moment
rest and listening apologize
for not finding out
I have what the meaning of life is but
that others should do
a beautiful sight
”
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