thank you for being here my name is Lisa Chan I am rather young I hope I was born
Chan I am rather young I hope I was born
Chan I am rather young I hope I was born in Madan but throughout my puberty my
in Madan but throughout my puberty my
in Madan but throughout my puberty my parents sent me to an international
parents sent me to an international
parents sent me to an international school because I was heavily bullied I
school because I was heavily bullied I
school because I was heavily bullied I was physically and mentally bullied
was physically and mentally bullied
was physically and mentally bullied throughout my primary school and as you
throughout my primary school and as you
throughout my primary school and as you know when you were in primary those are
know when you were in primary those are
know when you were in primary those are the most important times where it’s
the most important times where it’s
the most important times where it’s shaped who you become now and I was
shaped who you become now and I was
shaped who you become now and I was tortured I didn’t know who I was I
tortured I didn’t know who I was I
tortured I didn’t know who I was I thought I was like you know some this
thought I was like you know some this
thought I was like you know some this random geek who doesn’t like being
random geek who doesn’t like being
random geek who doesn’t like being around people which I did I didn’t like
around people which I did I didn’t like
around people which I did I didn’t like being around humans so I talked to my
being around humans so I talked to my
being around humans so I talked to my dogs my imaginary friends plenty of them
dogs my imaginary friends plenty of them
dogs my imaginary friends plenty of them there’s Kathy there Sharon there’s uh
there’s Kathy there Sharon there’s uh
there’s Kathy there Sharon there’s uh and people start to you know they
and people start to you know they
and people start to you know they thought I was creepy and now looking
thought I was creepy and now looking
thought I was creepy and now looking back I really was freaky I mean girl why
back I really was freaky I mean girl why
back I really was freaky I mean girl why are you talking so in that corner mm-hmm
are you talking so in that corner mm-hmm
are you talking so in that corner mm-hmm not normal and then growing up now as an
not normal and then growing up now as an
not normal and then growing up now as an adult mature adult in public so I began
adult mature adult in public so I began
adult mature adult in public so I began to know myself a little bit more I move
to know myself a little bit more I move
to know myself a little bit more I move to Malaysia and I am quite blessed to be
to Malaysia and I am quite blessed to be
to Malaysia and I am quite blessed to be surrounded by people you know who
surrounded by people you know who
surrounded by people you know who doesn’t really care about what people
doesn’t really care about what people
doesn’t really care about what people think who owns their confidence and
think who owns their confidence and
think who owns their confidence and who’s very really really unapologetic
who’s very really really unapologetic
who’s very really really unapologetic for being flawed they admit that they’re
for being flawed they admit that they’re
for being flawed they admit that they’re not perfect they admit they’re not
not perfect they admit they’re not
not perfect they admit they’re not pretty they’re handsome I’m not smart
pretty they’re handsome I’m not smart
pretty they’re handsome I’m not smart and whatever and that’s refreshing and
and whatever and that’s refreshing and
and whatever and that’s refreshing and slowly I began to accept the devil in me
slowly I began to accept the devil in me
slowly I began to accept the devil in me before we start you have to know what
before we start you have to know what
before we start you have to know what makes what makes your devil devil ished
makes what makes your devil devil ished
makes what makes your devil devil ished so you can call your devil laziness if
so you can call your devil laziness if
so you can call your devil laziness if you if you if you’re aware about the
you if you if you’re aware about the
you if you if you’re aware about the seven deadly sins there’s pride there’s
seven deadly sins there’s pride there’s
seven deadly sins there’s pride there’s slaw there’s there’s a lot of them but I
slaw there’s there’s a lot of them but I
slaw there’s there’s a lot of them but I call my pride this all of this this what
call my pride this all of this this what
call my pride this all of this this what cost my devil to come out
cost my devil to come out
cost my devil to come out since you know the big theme today is
since you know the big theme today is
since you know the big theme today is doing things right but I’m telling you
doing things right but I’m telling you
doing things right but I’m telling you one thing I have never done anything
one thing I have never done anything
one thing I have never done anything right in my life ever
right in my life ever
right in my life ever not that I can count on if you’re
not that I can count on if you’re
not that I can count on if you’re reading my journal or even what if you
reading my journal or even what if you
reading my journal or even what if you see my articles I work never in my life
see my articles I work never in my life
see my articles I work never in my life I know like I’m sure that I do anything
I know like I’m sure that I do anything
I know like I’m sure that I do anything right
right
right because what’s right the things that
because what’s right the things that
because what’s right the things that write to me might not be right for you
write to me might not be right for you
write to me might not be right for you whatever you think is right
whatever you think is right
whatever you think is right might not be for me the way you pray the
might not be for me the way you pray the
might not be for me the way you pray the way you praise people you might think
way you praise people you might think
way you praise people you might think it’s right but it might be really really
it’s right but it might be really really
it’s right but it might be really really wrong for me I’m 26 years old and in my
wrong for me I’m 26 years old and in my
wrong for me I’m 26 years old and in my 26 years old of life I’ve encountered so
26 years old of life I’ve encountered so
26 years old of life I’ve encountered so many Devils in me I was suffering from
many Devils in me I was suffering from
many Devils in me I was suffering from bulimia for throughout my high school
bulimia for throughout my high school
bulimia for throughout my high school years and I was diagnosed with
years and I was diagnosed with
years and I was diagnosed with depression functional depression there’s
depression functional depression there’s
depression functional depression there’s a lot of level of depressions but I’m
a lot of level of depressions but I’m
a lot of level of depressions but I’m one of the lucky ones that I can
one of the lucky ones that I can
one of the lucky ones that I can actually still function but they were
actually still function but they were
actually still function but they were still those days that I couldn’t wake up
still those days that I couldn’t wake up
still those days that I couldn’t wake up in the morning because I just feel like
in the morning because I just feel like
in the morning because I just feel like the room is getting smaller every second
the room is getting smaller every second
the room is getting smaller every second and there will be those days on Sutter
and there will be those days on Sutter
and there will be those days on Sutter now I fail I felt like partying all
now I fail I felt like partying all
now I fail I felt like partying all night long and then the next day I
night long and then the next day I
night long and then the next day I wouldn’t want to see any human and I
wouldn’t want to see any human and I
wouldn’t want to see any human and I just want to bury myself in my bed I’m
just want to bury myself in my bed I’m
just want to bury myself in my bed I’m like I don’t want to see you lissa eat
like I don’t want to see you lissa eat
like I don’t want to see you lissa eat why do I need to eat I don’t need food I
why do I need to eat I don’t need food I
why do I need to eat I don’t need food I don’t need oxygen I’m sure we all have
don’t need oxygen I’m sure we all have
don’t need oxygen I’m sure we all have that days right don’t make me feel bad
that days right don’t make me feel bad
that days right don’t make me feel bad right like you there so these are the
right like you there so these are the
right like you there so these are the tree steps for me to make sure I can
tree steps for me to make sure I can
tree steps for me to make sure I can still function as a human woman like you
still function as a human woman like you
still function as a human woman like you see in front so before you walk out this
see in front so before you walk out this
see in front so before you walk out this door I just want you to know that all of
door I just want you to know that all of
door I just want you to know that all of us here when you look to the left to the
us here when you look to the left to the
us here when you look to the left to the right we all have a devil inside of us
right we all have a devil inside of us
right we all have a devil inside of us you can name your devil anything but it
you can name your devil anything but it
you can name your devil anything but it will they will only be scary because
will they will only be scary because
will they will only be scary because they’re the unknown we are scared of the
they’re the unknown we are scared of the
they’re the unknown we are scared of the unknown because we don’t know how to
unknown because we don’t know how to
unknown because we don’t know how to label them because we’re humans it’s
label them because we’re humans it’s
label them because we’re humans it’s easier for us to process when we can
easier for us to process when we can
easier for us to process when we can give them a name you there you’re free
give them a name you there you’re free
give them a name you there you’re free get you there you’re cute but freaky you
get you there you’re cute but freaky you
get you there you’re cute but freaky you know it makes you process things better
know it makes you process things better
know it makes you process things better but what if you name your own double can
but what if you name your own double can
but what if you name your own double can you own up to that can you look at
you own up to that can you look at
you own up to that can you look at yourself in the mirror and say good
yourself in the mirror and say good
yourself in the mirror and say good morning you fabulous but you need a lot
morning you fabulous but you need a lot
morning you fabulous but you need a lot of things to work on today so first say
of things to work on today so first say
of things to work on today so first say hello to your devil that’s what I do
hello to your devil that’s what I do
hello to your devil that’s what I do every single day because when you were
every single day because when you were
every single day because when you were in therapy even though for three years
in therapy even though for three years
in therapy even though for three years it doesn’t stop it’s a daily struggle
it doesn’t stop it’s a daily struggle
it doesn’t stop it’s a daily struggle there are still those days when you know
there are still those days when you know
there are still those days when you know I am from a multicultural family I like
I am from a multicultural family I like
I am from a multicultural family I like to say my my mom is Muslim women Batak
to say my my mom is Muslim women Batak
to say my my mom is Muslim women Batak woman nevertheless you know how bad that
woman nevertheless you know how bad that
woman nevertheless you know how bad that moms are then my dad is a Chinese man
moms are then my dad is a Chinese man
moms are then my dad is a Chinese man he’s Buddhist so those two thick culture
he’s Buddhist so those two thick culture
he’s Buddhist so those two thick culture I grew up with and I didn’t choose my
I grew up with and I didn’t choose my
I grew up with and I didn’t choose my faith until I was 16 because I told them
faith until I was 16 because I told them
faith until I was 16 because I told them you know I don’t know any of that I
you know I don’t know any of that I
you know I don’t know any of that I don’t know I don’t know how to finish
don’t know I don’t know how to finish
don’t know I don’t know how to finish Quran because before you learn Quran you
Quran because before you learn Quran you
Quran because before you learn Quran you need to learn Arabic and that even with
need to learn Arabic and that even with
need to learn Arabic and that even with Buddhism it’s a lifestyle so you cannot
Buddhism it’s a lifestyle so you cannot
Buddhism it’s a lifestyle so you cannot commit to both and that’s also part of
commit to both and that’s also part of
commit to both and that’s also part of my Devils because when you have faith
my Devils because when you have faith
my Devils because when you have faith you know where to go you know whatever
you know where to go you know whatever
you know where to go you know whatever happens you have that one hope one
happens you have that one hope one
happens you have that one hope one shining like just like this one but
shining like just like this one but
shining like just like this one but inside of you but when you have no faith
inside of you but when you have no faith
inside of you but when you have no faith you don’t know where to go so say hello
you don’t know where to go so say hello
you don’t know where to go so say hello to your Devils I have a few Devils of my
to your Devils I have a few Devils of my
to your Devils I have a few Devils of my own and this is pointless picture I just
own and this is pointless picture I just
own and this is pointless picture I just want to show how cute I was when I was a
want to show how cute I was when I was a
want to show how cute I was when I was a kid
kid
kid so as you know me there in the middle in
so as you know me there in the middle in
so as you know me there in the middle in the really large Chinese and buttock
the really large Chinese and buttock
the really large Chinese and buttock family and that’s how actually I know
family and that’s how actually I know
family and that’s how actually I know that my Devils are actually rooted from
that my Devils are actually rooted from
that my Devils are actually rooted from childhood
childhood
childhood remember bullying doesn’t only happen in
remember bullying doesn’t only happen in
remember bullying doesn’t only happen in school it could it could start through
school it could it could start through
school it could it could start through from your family the way they say karma
from your family the way they say karma
from your family the way they say karma Kanchanaburi Guiteau i’m gonna come back
Kanchanaburi Guiteau i’m gonna come back
Kanchanaburi Guiteau i’m gonna come back nobody back about you Guinea it affects
nobody back about you Guinea it affects
nobody back about you Guinea it affects our mentality and after your name hurt
our mentality and after your name hurt
our mentality and after your name hurt this is my devil see yes you can see
this is my devil see yes you can see
this is my devil see yes you can see every day in the mirror I call my
every day in the mirror I call my
every day in the mirror I call my depression I call my my devil debbie
depression I call my my devil debbie
depression I call my my devil debbie downer depression and debbie downer
downer depression and debbie downer
downer depression and debbie downer depression have three other best friends
depression have three other best friends
depression have three other best friends it’s called bulimia trust issues and
it’s called bulimia trust issues and
it’s called bulimia trust issues and insecurities and when you look at me now
insecurities and when you look at me now
insecurities and when you look at me now I can talk to public but the process of
I can talk to public but the process of
I can talk to public but the process of getting up here it was a struggle I kept
getting up here it was a struggle I kept
getting up here it was a struggle I kept changing my slides to the point of I
changing my slides to the point of I
changing my slides to the point of I just sent my slide last night because I
just sent my slide last night because I
just sent my slide last night because I kept changing it changing it changing it
kept changing it changing it changing it
kept changing it changing it changing it because I know if I screw up it will
because I know if I screw up it will
because I know if I screw up it will affect me three months later I will keep
affect me three months later I will keep
affect me three months later I will keep beating myself up because when it comes
beating myself up because when it comes
beating myself up because when it comes to depression people don’t want to talk
to depression people don’t want to talk
to depression people don’t want to talk about it because when you say mean you
about it because when you say mean you
about it because when you say mean you tell people I’m so I’m very depressed
tell people I’m so I’m very depressed
tell people I’m so I’m very depressed you know what they say
you know what they say
you know what they say cheer up get over it you just need to
cheer up get over it you just need to
cheer up get over it you just need to get over it
get over it
get over it you just need to get out you just need
you just need to get out you just need
you just need to get out you just need to think positive but how can you think
to think positive but how can you think
to think positive but how can you think positive when there is no light inside
positive when there is no light inside
positive when there is no light inside of you what is the meaning of happy if
of you what is the meaning of happy if
of you what is the meaning of happy if you don’t even know how to define
you don’t even know how to define
you don’t even know how to define happiness
happiness
happiness people say you can go shop buy new
people say you can go shop buy new
people say you can go shop buy new clothes put on some makeup
clothes put on some makeup
clothes put on some makeup be like a normal human being but what if
be like a normal human being but what if
be like a normal human being but what if putting makeup is like putting on
putting makeup is like putting on
putting makeup is like putting on band-aids every day you have to you have
band-aids every day you have to you have
band-aids every day you have to you have to you know shield your devils so it
to you know shield your devils so it
to you know shield your devils so it looks presentable to the public eyes
looks presentable to the public eyes
looks presentable to the public eyes I I own a bar and it’s running well for
I I own a bar and it’s running well for
I I own a bar and it’s running well for 33 years so my job is to get people
33 years so my job is to get people
33 years so my job is to get people drunk because when people get job they
drunk because when people get job they
drunk because when people get job they talk and they drink again so that’s my
talk and they drink again so that’s my
talk and they drink again so that’s my money right there
money right there
money right there so I used to bartend because it’s the
so I used to bartend because it’s the
so I used to bartend because it’s the it’s the perfect place for people to
it’s the perfect place for people to
it’s the perfect place for people to open up you you don’t even need to ask
open up you you don’t even need to ask
open up you you don’t even need to ask them how’s your day they just keep on
them how’s your day they just keep on
them how’s your day they just keep on loving there’s this one guy he came to
loving there’s this one guy he came to
loving there’s this one guy he came to our bar and say I want anything you have
our bar and say I want anything you have
our bar and say I want anything you have well we have a lot in her memory it is a
well we have a lot in her memory it is a
well we have a lot in her memory it is a very expensive menu shall I say you know
very expensive menu shall I say you know
very expensive menu shall I say you know like whatever it is that you John my
like whatever it is that you John my
like whatever it is that you John my sorrow
sorrow
sorrow well even sorrow have categories what
well even sorrow have categories what
well even sorrow have categories what are you sad about so he started talking
are you sad about so he started talking
are you sad about so he started talking to us about how you know his wife is so
to us about how you know his wife is so
to us about how you know his wife is so demanding that he just you know he’s
demanding that he just you know he’s
demanding that he just you know he’s retired and he doesn’t have any money
retired and he doesn’t have any money
retired and he doesn’t have any money left and then the wife wants like the
left and then the wife wants like the
left and then the wife wants like the new Birkin bag or whatever and then
new Birkin bag or whatever and then
new Birkin bag or whatever and then another lady came and then she also
another lady came and then she also
another lady came and then she also asked the same thing do you have
asked the same thing do you have
asked the same thing do you have anything you know anything alcoholic but
anything you know anything alcoholic but
anything you know anything alcoholic but soft but still pretty okay Long Island
soft but still pretty okay Long Island
soft but still pretty okay Long Island iced tea for you but half of them will
iced tea for you but half of them will
iced tea for you but half of them will be just rum and vodka
be just rum and vodka
be just rum and vodka yeah the tea will be just like so we
yeah the tea will be just like so we
yeah the tea will be just like so we started talking and I just realized that
started talking and I just realized that
started talking and I just realized that we all have doubles inside of us but yet
we all have doubles inside of us but yet
we all have doubles inside of us but yet why don’t we talk about it ever mental
why don’t we talk about it ever mental
why don’t we talk about it ever mental illness is one topic that especially in
illness is one topic that especially in
illness is one topic that especially in mitten has never been brought upon its
mitten has never been brought upon its
mitten has never been brought upon its frown upon when you say I’m stressed is
frown upon when you say I’m stressed is
frown upon when you say I’m stressed is like oh here panadol
like oh here panadol
like oh here panadol I’m sad oh here Pizza zero and whenever
I’m sad oh here Pizza zero and whenever
I’m sad oh here Pizza zero and whenever whenever you want to tell them I just
whenever you want to tell them I just
whenever you want to tell them I just want you to listen why I’m sad why I’m
want you to listen why I’m sad why I’m
want you to listen why I’m sad why I’m upset why it feels like I feel alone
upset why it feels like I feel alone
upset why it feels like I feel alone even though I am right in the middle of
even though I am right in the middle of
even though I am right in the middle of a crowd and it’s a daily struggle not
a crowd and it’s a daily struggle not
a crowd and it’s a daily struggle not everyone knows why you’re so sad
everyone knows why you’re so sad
everyone knows why you’re so sad sometimes you’re just fat you woke up
sometimes you’re just fat you woke up
sometimes you’re just fat you woke up you feel like and then you dress
you feel like and then you dress
you feel like and then you dress like and then you look like
like and then you look like
like and then you look like and then in the end you feel like
and then in the end you feel like
and then in the end you feel like and you want to get out of it and then
and you want to get out of it and then
and you want to get out of it and then everyone keeps telling you it you know
everyone keeps telling you it you know
everyone keeps telling you it you know what you you’re breathing you’re not
what you you’re breathing you’re not
what you you’re breathing you’re not like starving you’re fine
like starving you’re fine
like starving you’re fine am i though am i fine with bulimia I
am i though am i fine with bulimia I
am i though am i fine with bulimia I learned that when you you know what
learned that when you you know what
learned that when you you know what bulimia is that when you you feel so
bulimia is that when you you feel so
bulimia is that when you you feel so bloated you feel this immense guilt you
bloated you feel this immense guilt you
bloated you feel this immense guilt you need to throw up to relief to have that
need to throw up to relief to have that
need to throw up to relief to have that sense of relief it’s not the food that
sense of relief it’s not the food that
sense of relief it’s not the food that is causing the the balloonman
is causing the the balloonman
is causing the the balloonman it’s the guilt every time I eat even now
it’s the guilt every time I eat even now
it’s the guilt every time I eat even now it’s still a day-to-day you know I need
it’s still a day-to-day you know I need
it’s still a day-to-day you know I need to manage my my diet my stress level or
to manage my my diet my stress level or
to manage my my diet my stress level or else I will binge eat and then I’ll feel
else I will binge eat and then I’ll feel
else I will binge eat and then I’ll feel really really guilty
really really guilty
really really guilty I’ll jitter and then I there will be an
I’ll jitter and then I there will be an
I’ll jitter and then I there will be an urge to pick it all out
urge to pick it all out
urge to pick it all out which is unhealthy you need to have a
which is unhealthy you need to have a
which is unhealthy you need to have a good relationship with food just for
good relationship with food just for
good relationship with food just for this life right I mean who doesn’t like
this life right I mean who doesn’t like
this life right I mean who doesn’t like those nasi padang it’s fantastic and
those nasi padang it’s fantastic and
those nasi padang it’s fantastic and then through all of those we have the
then through all of those we have the
then through all of those we have the master reveal our insecurities I mean
master reveal our insecurities I mean
master reveal our insecurities I mean who’s here
who’s here
who’s here so in sick so secure with themselves
so in sick so secure with themselves
so in sick so secure with themselves hands up calm our oh good for you bro
hands up calm our oh good for you bro
hands up calm our oh good for you bro that’s to talk to you later on so every
that’s to talk to you later on so every
that’s to talk to you later on so every day we wake up we’re not just insecure
day we wake up we’re not just insecure
day we wake up we’re not just insecure about our looks but what would we say if
about our looks but what would we say if
about our looks but what would we say if I say this what people think of me like
I say this what people think of me like
I say this what people think of me like this if I post a selfie with a wit like
this if I post a selfie with a wit like
this if I post a selfie with a wit like would there be any likes if I post a
would there be any likes if I post a
would there be any likes if I post a story when I get like reported I don’t
story when I get like reported I don’t
story when I get like reported I don’t know if you want to show you a cleavage
know if you want to show you a cleavage
know if you want to show you a cleavage show it on but it’s a daily struggle
show it on but it’s a daily struggle
show it on but it’s a daily struggle especially for us Millennials every day
especially for us Millennials every day
especially for us Millennials every day is a constant pressure to be perfect
is a constant pressure to be perfect
is a constant pressure to be perfect every day it’s like there’s this another
every day it’s like there’s this another
every day it’s like there’s this another hat here devil one devil 2 before 3 2 4
hat here devil one devil 2 before 3 2 4
hat here devil one devil 2 before 3 2 4 4
4
4 it’s like girl don’t put on that
it’s like girl don’t put on that
it’s like girl don’t put on that lipstick girl what our rice bag just
lipstick girl what our rice bag just
lipstick girl what our rice bag just cover your face cover everything and
cover your face cover everything and
cover your face cover everything and then another Devils will creep Bob and
then another Devils will creep Bob and
then another Devils will creep Bob and saying you know what you’re you’re
saying you know what you’re you’re
saying you know what you’re you’re nobody just like just closers and then
nobody just like just closers and then
nobody just like just closers and then it leads you to actually believe it and
it leads you to actually believe it and
it leads you to actually believe it and their that also came from our society
their that also came from our society
their that also came from our society our society of you cannot be proud of
our society of you cannot be proud of
our society of you cannot be proud of your side if you know what I mean it’s
your side if you know what I mean it’s
your side if you know what I mean it’s not okay here in midden for me
not okay here in midden for me
not okay here in midden for me personally to boast about yourself to be
personally to boast about yourself to be
personally to boast about yourself to be fully confident and especially if you’re
fully confident and especially if you’re
fully confident and especially if you’re a woman who looks like me who wear
a woman who looks like me who wear
a woman who looks like me who wear fishnet to work every day just because
fishnet to work every day just because
fishnet to work every day just because it feels a little hot in Medan and I
it feels a little hot in Medan and I
it feels a little hot in Medan and I need some ventilation you know its
need some ventilation you know its
need some ventilation you know its practicality my new people stare at you
practicality my new people stare at you
practicality my new people stare at you like why do you dress like this why
like why do you dress like this why
like why do you dress like this why can’t you just wear jeans and I’m like
can’t you just wear jeans and I’m like
can’t you just wear jeans and I’m like well why not did I tell you to buy me
well why not did I tell you to buy me
well why not did I tell you to buy me t-shirt no I didn’t did I did I ask your
t-shirt no I didn’t did I did I ask your
t-shirt no I didn’t did I did I ask your opinion no I didn’t but everyone’s feel
opinion no I didn’t but everyone’s feel
opinion no I didn’t but everyone’s feel entitled to how you look how you do this
entitled to how you look how you do this
entitled to how you look how you do this who you date how you who who’s your god
who you date how you who who’s your god
who you date how you who who’s your god everybody has an opinion to me they’re
everybody has an opinion to me they’re
everybody has an opinion to me they’re the devil’s we are all Devils here we
the devil’s we are all Devils here we
the devil’s we are all Devils here we are responsible for all of the issues we
are responsible for all of the issues we
are responsible for all of the issues we all have and nobody wants to admit that
all have and nobody wants to admit that
all have and nobody wants to admit that we are the cause of it why do you think
we are the cause of it why do you think
we are the cause of it why do you think there’s so many negativity it’s not it’s
there’s so many negativity it’s not it’s
there’s so many negativity it’s not it’s not Earth Mother Earth’s very positive
not Earth Mother Earth’s very positive
not Earth Mother Earth’s very positive we are and people keep saying over the
we are and people keep saying over the
we are and people keep saying over the planet is saying oh honey we are dying
planet is saying oh honey we are dying
planet is saying oh honey we are dying day by day we are dying because we are
day by day we are dying because we are
day by day we are dying because we are so stuck in this world of okay I need to
so stuck in this world of okay I need to
so stuck in this world of okay I need to chase more I need more money I need to
chase more I need more money I need to
chase more I need more money I need to be prettier I need to be more successful
be prettier I need to be more successful
be prettier I need to be more successful especially for women it’s tougher
especially for women it’s tougher
especially for women it’s tougher because you have a lot of other pressure
because you have a lot of other pressure
because you have a lot of other pressure you want to be seen a soft but you need
you want to be seen a soft but you need
you want to be seen a soft but you need to be strong you need to be reliable but
to be strong you need to be reliable but
to be strong you need to be reliable but you need to be firm it’s a constant
you need to be firm it’s a constant
you need to be firm it’s a constant battle like make up your mind do you
battle like make up your mind do you
battle like make up your mind do you want me to be pretty or do you want me
want me to be pretty or do you want me
want me to be pretty or do you want me fierce skinned me one good and then you
fierce skinned me one good and then you
fierce skinned me one good and then you to the other side to your parents your
to the other side to your parents your
to the other side to your parents your parents the mother core of my
parents the mother core of my
parents the mother core of my insecurities but they mean well they
insecurities but they mean well they
insecurities but they mean well they just want you to be safe in this world
just want you to be safe in this world
just want you to be safe in this world that’s why they want you tiptoe around
that’s why they want you tiptoe around
that’s why they want you tiptoe around the world not guess crash not get bitten
the world not guess crash not get bitten
the world not guess crash not get bitten by mosquito but gosh you will be bitten
by mosquito but gosh you will be bitten
by mosquito but gosh you will be bitten by King Kong
my mother always say Lisa you’re a women
my mother always say Lisa you’re a women you’re a mixture of duck and Chinese
you’re a mixture of duck and Chinese
you’re a mixture of duck and Chinese behave like one I’m like okay let’s
behave like one I’m like okay let’s
behave like one I’m like okay let’s Google how to behave like buttock and
Google how to behave like buttock and
Google how to behave like buttock and Chinese oh man you know what Google
Chinese oh man you know what Google
Chinese oh man you know what Google doesn’t have an answer if Google’s
doesn’t have an answer if Google’s
doesn’t have an answer if Google’s saying we have everything but you know
saying we have everything but you know
saying we have everything but you know ah you don’t know you don’t know
ah you don’t know you don’t know
ah you don’t know you don’t know anything about being a buttock woman and
anything about being a buttock woman and
anything about being a buttock woman and a Chinese woman nevertheless every
a Chinese woman nevertheless every
a Chinese woman nevertheless every Chinese New Year every Christmas every
Chinese New Year every Christmas every
Chinese New Year every Christmas every every little feature it’s like oh my god
every little feature it’s like oh my god
every little feature it’s like oh my god it’s like I’m walking into hunger games
it’s like I’m walking into hunger games
it’s like I’m walking into hunger games and I do not volunteer as tribute no I
and I do not volunteer as tribute no I
and I do not volunteer as tribute no I did not sir I will go like hey do you
did not sir I will go like hey do you
did not sir I will go like hey do you want to go have dinner with Grandpa pass
want to go have dinner with Grandpa pass
want to go have dinner with Grandpa pass hey your cousin oh hey another picture
hey your cousin oh hey another picture
hey your cousin oh hey another picture that I want you guys to see it was
that I want you guys to see it was
that I want you guys to see it was created by this famous artist from
created by this famous artist from
created by this famous artist from America it’s called Pauline or she
America it’s called Pauline or she
America it’s called Pauline or she really embraced the devil within herself
really embraced the devil within herself
really embraced the devil within herself because this is just a facade this is
because this is just a facade this is
because this is just a facade this is the masks that we wear what is going on
the masks that we wear what is going on
the masks that we wear what is going on inside of us only we know only when were
inside of us only we know only when were
inside of us only we know only when were in a really really small toilet and
in a really really small toilet and
in a really really small toilet and especially when it’s dark that’s your
especially when it’s dark that’s your
especially when it’s dark that’s your real self when you you know when you
real self when you you know when you
real self when you you know when you take a douche cuz you don’t you don’t
take a douche cuz you don’t you don’t
take a douche cuz you don’t you don’t care whose leg on your left I know in
care whose leg on your left I know in
care whose leg on your left I know in your right you just like poor man you
your right you just like poor man you
your right you just like poor man you don’t care like you and then ideas start
don’t care like you and then ideas start
don’t care like you and then ideas start popping up thoughts popping out those
popping up thoughts popping out those
popping up thoughts popping out those sevens ex-boyfriend in whatever school
sevens ex-boyfriend in whatever school
sevens ex-boyfriend in whatever school start appearing again and then you’re
start appearing again and then you’re
start appearing again and then you’re like oh why did I do that in TEDx today
like oh why did I do that in TEDx today
like oh why did I do that in TEDx today oh no they’re like oh why did I wear
oh no they’re like oh why did I wear
oh no they’re like oh why did I wear that fishnet stocking now I’m cold
that fishnet stocking now I’m cold
that fishnet stocking now I’m cold I might get like ten with like limes all
I might get like ten with like limes all
I might get like ten with like limes all the bad decision when you’re alone so
the bad decision when you’re alone so
the bad decision when you’re alone so I’m asking all of you here when you’re
I’m asking all of you here when you’re
I’m asking all of you here when you’re alone come
alone come
alone come alone can you face your own devil can
alone can you face your own devil can
alone can you face your own devil can you face it head-on can you be nice to
you face it head-on can you be nice to
you face it head-on can you be nice to them can you say you know what I know
them can you say you know what I know
them can you say you know what I know you’re my devil but we can be best
you’re my devil but we can be best
you’re my devil but we can be best friends I’ll be there for you you you
friends I’ll be there for you you you
friends I’ll be there for you you you know what you will have an episode here
know what you will have an episode here
know what you will have an episode here there you’ll pop in pop out you might
there you’ll pop in pop out you might
there you’ll pop in pop out you might kill me sometimes but I’ll be there for
kill me sometimes but I’ll be there for
kill me sometimes but I’ll be there for you no matter what because if you’re not
you no matter what because if you’re not
you no matter what because if you’re not there for yourself I’m sorry honey sure
there for yourself I’m sorry honey sure
there for yourself I’m sorry honey sure this nobody else will be there for you
this nobody else will be there for you
this nobody else will be there for you so let me end with this quote here is
so let me end with this quote here is
so let me end with this quote here is from frida kahlo any of you guys know
from frida kahlo any of you guys know
from frida kahlo any of you guys know for your fellow so she said I tried to
for your fellow so she said I tried to
for your fellow so she said I tried to drown my sorrows but the bastard learned
drown my sorrows but the bastard learned
drown my sorrows but the bastard learned how to swim and now I’m overwhelmed by
how to swim and now I’m overwhelmed by
how to swim and now I’m overwhelmed by this decent and good feeling always
this decent and good feeling always
this decent and good feeling always believe that every progress you made
believe that every progress you made
believe that every progress you made mean something and it doesn’t have to
mean something and it doesn’t have to
mean something and it doesn’t have to mean anything else to other people just
mean anything else to other people just
mean anything else to other people just you so you be you because why you’re all
you so you be you because why you’re all
you so you be you because why you’re all definitely good people thank you very
definitely good people thank you very
definitely good people thank you very much
much
much [Music]
[Music]
[Music] [Applause]
”
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