how many of you aren’t really sure whether you’re an introvert or an
whether you’re an introvert or an
whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert raise your hands
extrovert raise your hands
extrovert raise your hands quite a few of you yeah that’s good
quite a few of you yeah that’s good
quite a few of you yeah that’s good that means you might be a flexed revert
that means you might be a flexed revert
that means you might be a flexed revert today I want to talk about what it means
today I want to talk about what it means
today I want to talk about what it means to be a flexed revert how is it that
to be a flexed revert how is it that
to be a flexed revert how is it that flexed averts gets so much more from
flexed averts gets so much more from
flexed averts gets so much more from life and what do you have to do to
life and what do you have to do to
life and what do you have to do to become one but first of all I’d like to
become one but first of all I’d like to
become one but first of all I’d like to share with you a story something that
share with you a story something that
share with you a story something that happened to me back in June of this year
happened to me back in June of this year
happened to me back in June of this year I had a big birthday and organized a
I had a big birthday and organized a
I had a big birthday and organized a house party for 30 and family and
house party for 30 and family and
house party for 30 and family and friends renting a lovely big house on
friends renting a lovely big house on
friends renting a lovely big house on the south coast in a village in Oh
the south coast in a village in Oh
the south coast in a village in Oh Dorset so we all rocked up there for a
Dorset so we all rocked up there for a
Dorset so we all rocked up there for a few days eating drinking singing dancing
few days eating drinking singing dancing
few days eating drinking singing dancing hanging out together it was amazing we
hanging out together it was amazing we
hanging out together it was amazing we had a really good time but there was
had a really good time but there was
had a really good time but there was just one thing that threatened to spoil
just one thing that threatened to spoil
just one thing that threatened to spoil the occasion and it happened on Saturday
the occasion and it happened on Saturday
the occasion and it happened on Saturday morning I had organized a get-together
morning I had organized a get-together
morning I had organized a get-together other drumming workshop but I called
other drumming workshop but I called
other drumming workshop but I called Ralph brought along a load of African
Ralph brought along a load of African
Ralph brought along a load of African drums and he set them up in the garden
drums and he set them up in the garden
drums and he set them up in the garden so we could all do some drumming I’m not
so we could all do some drumming I’m not
so we could all do some drumming I’m not very musical but I thought well banging
very musical but I thought well banging
very musical but I thought well banging a drum
a drum
a drum I mean how difficult can that be and
I mean how difficult can that be and
I mean how difficult can that be and actually when you’re banging a drum with
actually when you’re banging a drum with
actually when you’re banging a drum with 30 other people you can actually kid
30 other people you can actually kid
30 other people you can actually kid yourself that you sound quite good so
yourself that you sound quite good so
yourself that you sound quite good so there we are on Saturday morning or
there we are on Saturday morning or
there we are on Saturday morning or banging our bongos and I noticed across
banging our bongos and I noticed across
banging our bongos and I noticed across the garden this elderly gentleman
the garden this elderly gentleman
the garden this elderly gentleman walking towards us oh no here we go
walking towards us oh no here we go
walking towards us oh no here we go complaining neighbor so immediately my
complaining neighbor so immediately my
complaining neighbor so immediately my brain goes into sort of defensive mode I
brain goes into sort of defensive mode I
brain goes into sort of defensive mode I started thinking I right what can I say
started thinking I right what can I say
started thinking I right what can I say okay well it’s not the middle of the
okay well it’s not the middle of the
okay well it’s not the middle of the night is that we can’t be disturbing
night is that we can’t be disturbing
night is that we can’t be disturbing that many people we’re not near many
that many people we’re not near many
that many people we’re not near many houses we’re not going to be here for
houses we’re not going to be here for
houses we’re not going to be here for long etc etc my brain just started
long etc etc my brain just started
long etc etc my brain just started working overtime and as he came towards
working overtime and as he came towards
working overtime and as he came towards us and he started saying you know you’re
us and he started saying you know you’re
us and he started saying you know you’re making rather a lot of noise isn’t such
making rather a lot of noise isn’t such
making rather a lot of noise isn’t such in his cloth cap in his country tweeds
in his cloth cap in his country tweeds
in his cloth cap in his country tweeds and a scowl on his face before I could
and a scowl on his face before I could
and a scowl on his face before I could go up with my case for the defense
go up with my case for the defense
go up with my case for the defense somebody else stood up and it was
somebody else stood up and it was
somebody else stood up and it was ray-ray is my business partner it do
ray-ray is my business partner it do
ray-ray is my business partner it do something different
something different
something different an all-round good guy and this is right
an all-round good guy and this is right
an all-round good guy and this is right here and Ray stood up and he said to
here and Ray stood up and he said to
here and Ray stood up and he said to this gentleman oi he said
this gentleman oi he said
this gentleman oi he said have you ever played one of these and I
have you ever played one of these and I
have you ever played one of these and I said oh no and very certain well what do
said oh no and very certain well what do
said oh no and very certain well what do you have it go anyway mmm okay then I
you have it go anyway mmm okay then I
you have it go anyway mmm okay then I will
will
will so you see really sitting there next to
so you see really sitting there next to
so you see really sitting there next to his lovely wife Jane a little while
his lovely wife Jane a little while
his lovely wife Jane a little while later if you see the guy sitting there
later if you see the guy sitting there
later if you see the guy sitting there next to Ray’s wife Jane and Ray’s moved
next to Ray’s wife Jane and Ray’s moved
next to Ray’s wife Jane and Ray’s moved out of the way okay and it all ended
out of the way okay and it all ended
out of the way okay and it all ended really well later on he started telling
really well later on he started telling
really well later on he started telling us stories about his life in the house
us stories about his life in the house
us stories about his life in the house and we had all got on really really well
and we had all got on really really well
and we had all got on really really well it ended beautifully and I thought to
it ended beautifully and I thought to
it ended beautifully and I thought to myself thank goodness that I hadn’t been
myself thank goodness that I hadn’t been
myself thank goodness that I hadn’t been able to just do what I would normally do
able to just do what I would normally do
able to just do what I would normally do and tend to do and meet confrontation
and tend to do and meet confrontation
and tend to do and meet confrontation with confrontation I was a bit ashamed
with confrontation I was a bit ashamed
with confrontation I was a bit ashamed of myself I was even going to do this
of myself I was even going to do this
of myself I was even going to do this with a 90 year old man I mean what was I
with a 90 year old man I mean what was I
with a 90 year old man I mean what was I gonna do flaw him or something oh it’s
gonna do flaw him or something oh it’s
gonna do flaw him or something oh it’s ridiculous thank goodness
ridiculous thank goodness
ridiculous thank goodness ray managed to show the first
ray managed to show the first
ray managed to show the first characteristic of a flex divert flex
characteristic of a flex divert flex
characteristic of a flex divert flex device are able to act in a way that’s
device are able to act in a way that’s
device are able to act in a way that’s best for each situation okay not
best for each situation okay not
best for each situation okay not according to their default strategy we
according to their default strategy we
according to their default strategy we all have defaults we have personality
all have defaults we have personality
all have defaults we have personality habits we have experiences that just
habits we have experiences that just
habits we have experiences that just kind of pre-program us to respond to
kind of pre-program us to respond to
kind of pre-program us to respond to every situation in the same way but it’s
every situation in the same way but it’s
every situation in the same way but it’s not always the best way because we
not always the best way because we
not always the best way because we always have choices but we don’t always
always have choices but we don’t always
always have choices but we don’t always realize we have choices we tend to just
realize we have choices we tend to just
realize we have choices we tend to just to go along with a social norm cueing in
to go along with a social norm cueing in
to go along with a social norm cueing in Britain it said that we spent three
Britain it said that we spent three
Britain it said that we spent three years of our lives queuing and some of
years of our lives queuing and some of
years of our lives queuing and some of these people look as if they’ve been
these people look as if they’ve been
these people look as if they’ve been there longer than three years don’t they
there longer than three years don’t they
there longer than three years don’t they know we just kind of fall into line
know we just kind of fall into line
know we just kind of fall into line pretty mindless list we’re a bit like
pretty mindless list we’re a bit like
pretty mindless list we’re a bit like sheep aren’t we
sheep aren’t we
sheep aren’t we but recently my son sent me this picture
but recently my son sent me this picture
but recently my son sent me this picture this is how they cute
this is how they cute
this is how they cute he lives in Thailand this is how they
he lives in Thailand this is how they
he lives in Thailand this is how they queue in Thailand even when you think
queue in Thailand even when you think
queue in Thailand even when you think there isn’t another way there’s always
there isn’t another way there’s always
there isn’t another way there’s always another way okay and I realize that
another way okay and I realize that
another way okay and I realize that there are so many aspects of our lives
there are so many aspects of our lives
there are so many aspects of our lives where we just go down one room whereas
where we just go down one room whereas
where we just go down one room whereas in fact there are multiple dimensions of
in fact there are multiple dimensions of
in fact there are multiple dimensions of events of people of situations where we
events of people of situations where we
events of people of situations where we have choices the news is a great example
have choices the news is a great example
have choices the news is a great example isn’t it we’ve fed one type of news
isn’t it we’ve fed one type of news
isn’t it we’ve fed one type of news negativity
negativity
negativity the media feeds us a diet of disaster
the media feeds us a diet of disaster
the media feeds us a diet of disaster tragedy human failing ah is really
tragedy human failing ah is really
tragedy human failing ah is really depressing and I suddenly realized a few
depressing and I suddenly realized a few
depressing and I suddenly realized a few months ago this isn’t representative of
months ago this isn’t representative of
months ago this isn’t representative of everything that’s going on in the world
everything that’s going on in the world
everything that’s going on in the world there’s some really really positive
there’s some really really positive
there’s some really really positive stuff happening in out in the world so I
stuff happening in out in the world so I
stuff happening in out in the world so I started tuning into positive news
started tuning into positive news
started tuning into positive news networks they do exist and I found this
networks they do exist and I found this
networks they do exist and I found this story on the Good News Network and it
story on the Good News Network and it
story on the Good News Network and it was a story of a group of people six
was a story of a group of people six
was a story of a group of people six friends in the US who were having a
friends in the US who were having a
friends in the US who were having a dinner party and that you know usual
dinner party and that you know usual
dinner party and that you know usual thing getting together having starters
thing getting together having starters
thing getting together having starters main course
main course
main course just getting onto the cheese and
just getting onto the cheese and
just getting onto the cheese and cracking open another bottle of Merlot
cracking open another bottle of Merlot
cracking open another bottle of Merlot and armed intruder burst through the
and armed intruder burst through the
and armed intruder burst through the door held a gun to their heads and
door held a gun to their heads and
door held a gun to their heads and demanded that they hand over all of
demanded that they hand over all of
demanded that they hand over all of their cash apart from being terrified
their cash apart from being terrified
their cash apart from being terrified they realized their embarrassment that
they realized their embarrassment that
they realized their embarrassment that nobody had any cash on them it’s a first
nobody had any cash on them it’s a first
nobody had any cash on them it’s a first world problem isn’t it with cheese rich
world problem isn’t it with cheese rich
world problem isn’t it with cheese rich cash poor so they decided they would try
cash poor so they decided they would try
cash poor so they decided they would try and talk the guy down trying reason with
and talk the guy down trying reason with
and talk the guy down trying reason with him it’s what you do right but actually
him it’s what you do right but actually
him it’s what you do right but actually it just made him madder and more
it just made him madder and more
it just made him madder and more aggressive until one of the guests
aggressive until one of the guests
aggressive until one of the guests Christina decided that she would just
Christina decided that she would just
Christina decided that she would just offer him a glass of wine this is we’re
offer him a glass of wine this is we’re
offer him a glass of wine this is we’re just open this bottle of wine why didn’t
just open this bottle of wine why didn’t
just open this bottle of wine why didn’t he have a glass he accepted the glass of
he have a glass he accepted the glass of
he have a glass he accepted the glass of wine he drank it he has some cheese he
wine he drank it he has some cheese he
wine he drank it he has some cheese he touch his gun under his arm and he left
touch his gun under his arm and he left
touch his gun under his arm and he left it all ended perfectly I mean it could
it all ended perfectly I mean it could
it all ended perfectly I mean it could so easily have gone the other way and
so easily have gone the other way and
so easily have gone the other way and I’m not saying that whenever your
I’m not saying that whenever your
I’m not saying that whenever your personal safety is threatened or in
personal safety is threatened or in
personal safety is threatened or in danger that you reach for a bottle of
danger that you reach for a bottle of
danger that you reach for a bottle of Beaujolais two glasses okay but on this
Beaujolais two glasses okay but on this
Beaujolais two glasses okay but on this occasion she was a flexed revert flexed
occasion she was a flexed revert flexed
occasion she was a flexed revert flexed reverts are able to flip the script in
reverts are able to flip the script in
reverts are able to flip the script in order to get the best possible outcome
order to get the best possible outcome
order to get the best possible outcome there are scripts for everything that we
there are scripts for everything that we
there are scripts for everything that we do the brain stores information and
do the brain stores information and
do the brain stores information and particularly sequences of events in the
particularly sequences of events in the
particularly sequences of events in the form of scripts it’s a mental shortcut
form of scripts it’s a mental shortcut
form of scripts it’s a mental shortcut it saves the brain having to do much
it saves the brain having to do much
it saves the brain having to do much work so flipping the script can be
work so flipping the script can be
work so flipping the script can be really good for us if we can remember to
really good for us if we can remember to
really good for us if we can remember to do it because we remember that every
do it because we remember that every
do it because we remember that every event every situation
event every situation
event every situation we have choices we don’t have to follow
we have choices we don’t have to follow
we have choices we don’t have to follow the script this happened to me when I
the script this happened to me when I
the script this happened to me when I first met my husband Ben and we went out
first met my husband Ben and we went out
first met my husband Ben and we went out for dinner together
for dinner together
for dinner together it wasn’t my husband when I first met
it wasn’t my husband when I first met
it wasn’t my husband when I first met him but we we first went for a meal
him but we we first went for a meal
him but we we first went for a meal together and you know we have a
together and you know we have a
together and you know we have a restaurant script in our brain instantly
restaurant script in our brain instantly
restaurant script in our brain instantly said that we know what to do we we turn
said that we know what to do we we turn
said that we know what to do we we turn up we get a menu we order a drink we sit
up we get a menu we order a drink we sit
up we get a menu we order a drink we sit at the table order our food eat it pay
at the table order our food eat it pay
at the table order our food eat it pay and leave okay so we sat down we had a
and leave okay so we sat down we had a
and leave okay so we sat down we had a drink we looked at the menu and he said
drink we looked at the menu and he said
drink we looked at the menu and he said okay I’ll order for you and you order
okay I’ll order for you and you order
okay I’ll order for you and you order for me I know that’s a bit different
for me I know that’s a bit different
for me I know that’s a bit different especially because I was quite a fussy
especially because I was quite a fussy
especially because I was quite a fussy eater in those days and I was had the
eater in those days and I was had the
eater in those days and I was had the fish cakes so we ordered for each other
fish cakes so we ordered for each other
fish cakes so we ordered for each other and he got my fish cakes and I ended up
and he got my fish cakes and I ended up
and he got my fish cakes and I ended up with pork belly not literally I did he
with pork belly not literally I did he
with pork belly not literally I did he quite a lot um and it started me on a
quite a lot um and it started me on a
quite a lot um and it started me on a journey of being more adventurous with
journey of being more adventurous with
journey of being more adventurous with food and of doing things differently and
food and of doing things differently and
food and of doing things differently and we went on to found do something
we went on to found do something
we went on to found do something different together so that’s flipping
different together so that’s flipping
different together so that’s flipping the script that’s doing things
the script that’s doing things
the script that’s doing things differently to get a better outcome in a
differently to get a better outcome in a
differently to get a better outcome in a relationship or a situation and I’m
relationship or a situation and I’m
relationship or a situation and I’m reminded of this lovely film Dead Poets
reminded of this lovely film Dead Poets
reminded of this lovely film Dead Poets Society I don’t know if any of you have
Society I don’t know if any of you have
Society I don’t know if any of you have seen it where the late lovely Robin
seen it where the late lovely Robin
seen it where the late lovely Robin Williams played John Keating he was a
Williams played John Keating he was a
Williams played John Keating he was a poetry teacher he was trying to
poetry teacher he was trying to
poetry teacher he was trying to emphasize to his boys that they could be
emphasize to his boys that they could be
emphasize to his boys that they could be individuals they could make their lives
individuals they could make their lives
individuals they could make their lives extraordinary they didn’t have to do
extraordinary they didn’t have to do
extraordinary they didn’t have to do what their brothers and fathers had done
what their brothers and fathers had done
what their brothers and fathers had done before them they could carve ìtell out
before them they could carve ìtell out
before them they could carve ìtell out of life for themselves he’s and he
of life for themselves he’s and he
of life for themselves he’s and he jumped up on his desk on one occasion
jumped up on his desk on one occasion
jumped up on his desk on one occasion and he said to them I stand upon my desk
and he said to them I stand upon my desk
and he said to them I stand upon my desk to remind myself that we must constantly
to remind myself that we must constantly
to remind myself that we must constantly look at things in a different way
look at things in a different way
look at things in a different way when we look at things in a different
when we look at things in a different
when we look at things in a different way when we’d get a new view we see new
way when we’d get a new view we see new
way when we’d get a new view we see new opportunities we need see new possible
opportunities we need see new possible
opportunities we need see new possible outcome so we see all the potential in a
outcome so we see all the potential in a
outcome so we see all the potential in a situation he wanted them to make their
situation he wanted them to make their
situation he wanted them to make their lives extraordinary he also told them to
lives extraordinary he also told them to
lives extraordinary he also told them to rip the introduction out of their poetry
rip the introduction out of their poetry
rip the introduction out of their poetry books so they weren’t influenced by what
books so they weren’t influenced by what
books so they weren’t influenced by what others have said before them he told
others have said before them he told
others have said before them he told them to walk differently in the chord
them to walk differently in the chord
them to walk differently in the chord not to just fall in step with everybody
not to just fall in step with everybody
not to just fall in step with everybody else
else
else he’s helped them to turn the ordinary
he’s helped them to turn the ordinary
he’s helped them to turn the ordinary into the extraordinary but he had to do
into the extraordinary but he had to do
into the extraordinary but he had to do something different he had to in the end
something different he had to in the end
something different he had to in the end stand up on my desk and get them to
stand up on my desk and get them to
stand up on my desk and get them to stand on the desk to emphasize that you
stand on the desk to emphasize that you
stand on the desk to emphasize that you don’t have to go with the flow and
don’t have to go with the flow and
don’t have to go with the flow and follow the script and so flex traverse
follow the script and so flex traverse
follow the script and so flex traverse are willing to take risks he took a risk
are willing to take risks he took a risk
are willing to take risks he took a risk with his job in the film he took a risk
with his job in the film he took a risk
with his job in the film he took a risk with his teaching career I don’t teach
with his teaching career I don’t teach
with his teaching career I don’t teach you to do that and teach the train in
you to do that and teach the train in
you to do that and teach the train in college and Ben took a risk with my pork
college and Ben took a risk with my pork
college and Ben took a risk with my pork belly I put up in a vegetarian do
belly I put up in a vegetarian do
belly I put up in a vegetarian do anything but flex of us are willing to
anything but flex of us are willing to
anything but flex of us are willing to go the extra mile and take the risk to
go the extra mile and take the risk to
go the extra mile and take the risk to make meaningful connections with other
make meaningful connections with other
make meaningful connections with other people and that’s the flex traverse
people and that’s the flex traverse
people and that’s the flex traverse advantage those are the characteristics
advantage those are the characteristics
advantage those are the characteristics of flex traverse so how does it pan out
of flex traverse so how does it pan out
of flex traverse so how does it pan out for them when I said they get more from
for them when I said they get more from
for them when I said they get more from life what does it actually mean well
life what does it actually mean well
life what does it actually mean well we’ve been working at do something
we’ve been working at do something
we’ve been working at do something different to help people become more
different to help people become more
different to help people become more flex traverse in their behaviors and
flex traverse in their behaviors and
flex traverse in their behaviors and their personalities for years
their personalities for years
their personalities for years and we’ve been looking at data that show
and we’ve been looking at data that show
and we’ve been looking at data that show that flexor votes are healthier they’re
that flexor votes are healthier they’re
that flexor votes are healthier they’re physically healthier the higher person
physically healthier the higher person
physically healthier the higher person is in flexed aversion the lower their
is in flexed aversion the lower their
is in flexed aversion the lower their BMI that’s from data from thousands of
BMI that’s from data from thousands of
BMI that’s from data from thousands of people they’re also mentally healthier
people they’re also mentally healthier
people they’re also mentally healthier flex devotes are less stressed the more
flex devotes are less stressed the more
flex devotes are less stressed the more flex divert if somebody can be the more
flex divert if somebody can be the more
flex divert if somebody can be the more coping strategies they will have at
coping strategies they will have at
coping strategies they will have at their disposal therefore the more
their disposal therefore the more
their disposal therefore the more situations they can manage and cope with
situations they can manage and cope with
situations they can manage and cope with so obviously they’re going to be less
so obviously they’re going to be less
so obviously they’re going to be less stressed this is some data of based on
stressed this is some data of based on
stressed this is some data of based on data from Bonanno in Columbia University
data from Bonanno in Columbia University
data from Bonanno in Columbia University they looked at people after 9/11 in the
they looked at people after 9/11 in the
they looked at people after 9/11 in the u.s. it was naturally to be stressed to
u.s. it was naturally to be stressed to
u.s. it was naturally to be stressed to be fearful to be angry and to be sad
be fearful to be angry and to be sad
be fearful to be angry and to be sad even a year later they looked at the
even a year later they looked at the
even a year later they looked at the people who were doing well who were the
people who were doing well who were the
people who were doing well who were the best adjusted a year after 9/11 and they
best adjusted a year after 9/11 and they
best adjusted a year after 9/11 and they found the flexed reverse were the ones
found the flexed reverse were the ones
found the flexed reverse were the ones who were had adjusted the best and we’re
who were had adjusted the best and we’re
who were had adjusted the best and we’re getting on and coping well with life in
getting on and coping well with life in
getting on and coping well with life in the world of business Adam grant looked
the world of business Adam grant looked
the world of business Adam grant looked at the characteristics of salespeople
at the characteristics of salespeople
at the characteristics of salespeople think that extroverts would make the
think that extroverts would make the
think that extroverts would make the best salespeople right they don’t
best salespeople right they don’t
best salespeople right they don’t nor do introverts interestingly but the
nor do introverts interestingly but the
nor do introverts interestingly but the people who were the most effective sales
people who were the most effective sales
people who were the most effective sales people and who perform the best were
people and who perform the best were
people and who perform the best were those who could be both extroverted and
those who could be both extroverted and
those who could be both extroverted and introverted they knew when to talk but
introverted they knew when to talk but
introverted they knew when to talk but they also knew when it was a list the
they also knew when it was a list the
they also knew when it was a list the right to listen so they were flexed
right to listen so they were flexed
right to listen so they were flexed averts flexor votes also show up frank
averts flexor votes also show up frank
averts flexor votes also show up frank bond from City University conducted a
bond from City University conducted a
bond from City University conducted a study in which he showed that the people
study in which he showed that the people
study in which he showed that the people who were flexed reverted the most
who were flexed reverted the most
who were flexed reverted the most psychologically flexible behaviorally
psychologically flexible behaviorally
psychologically flexible behaviorally flexible people were less likely to
flexible people were less likely to
flexible people were less likely to figure in the absenteeism figures and
figure in the absenteeism figures and
figure in the absenteeism figures and this is some data from do something
this is some data from do something
this is some data from do something different where we looked at people’s
different where we looked at people’s
different where we looked at people’s ability to be tolerant of difference in
ability to be tolerant of difference in
ability to be tolerant of difference in others and I think it’s really
others and I think it’s really
others and I think it’s really fascinating that flex traverse are more
fascinating that flex traverse are more
fascinating that flex traverse are more tolerant this graph the green bars are
tolerant this graph the green bars are
tolerant this graph the green bars are the most important because as they grow
the most important because as they grow
the most important because as they grow go up we’re looking at people’s ability
go up we’re looking at people’s ability
go up we’re looking at people’s ability to be inclusive of others and tolerant
to be inclusive of others and tolerant
to be inclusive of others and tolerant of difference and the ones on the left
of difference and the ones on the left
of difference and the ones on the left are people who are low in Flex diversion
are people who are low in Flex diversion
are people who are low in Flex diversion and the ones on the right are the real
and the ones on the right are the real
and the ones on the right are the real high flex reverse they’re more capable
high flex reverse they’re more capable
high flex reverse they’re more capable of seeing the multiple dimensions not
of seeing the multiple dimensions not
of seeing the multiple dimensions not just in events but in other people as
just in events but in other people as
just in events but in other people as well they’re more tolerant of difference
well they’re more tolerant of difference
well they’re more tolerant of difference and when we live in a world in which we
and when we live in a world in which we
and when we live in a world in which we seem to be getting less tolerance of
seem to be getting less tolerance of
seem to be getting less tolerance of difference there seems to be more and
difference there seems to be more and
difference there seems to be more and more hatred in the world I think this is
more hatred in the world I think this is
more hatred in the world I think this is an incredibly important asset in making
an incredibly important asset in making
an incredibly important asset in making sure that we can all live harmoniously
sure that we can all live harmoniously
sure that we can all live harmoniously together so the good news is we can all
together so the good news is we can all
together so the good news is we can all become flexed reverse restate three
become flexed reverse restate three
become flexed reverse restate three things you need to do if you want to be
things you need to do if you want to be
things you need to do if you want to be more flexed averted first of all you
more flexed averted first of all you
more flexed averted first of all you have to stop you have to inhibit your
have to stop you have to inhibit your
have to stop you have to inhibit your default response you have to stop
default response you have to stop
default response you have to stop yourself going with a script then you
yourself going with a script then you
yourself going with a script then you have to flip it
have to flip it
have to flip it that means flipping the script
that means flipping the script
that means flipping the script considering the alternative knowing that
considering the alternative knowing that
considering the alternative knowing that you have choices and thirdly you must
you have choices and thirdly you must
you have choices and thirdly you must use it you’ve got to do it put it into
use it you’ve got to do it put it into
use it you’ve got to do it put it into action because after all we are defined
action because after all we are defined
action because after all we are defined by our actions not our words so I
by our actions not our words so I
by our actions not our words so I contend that the flexor
contend that the flexor
contend that the flexor advantage is good for us all it’s great
advantage is good for us all it’s great
advantage is good for us all it’s great for you for your relationships for your
for you for your relationships for your
for you for your relationships for your physical and mental health and it’s a
physical and mental health and it’s a
physical and mental health and it’s a tool that we all need going forward if
tool that we all need going forward if
tool that we all need going forward if we’re to live harmoniously together and
we’re to live harmoniously together and
we’re to live harmoniously together and make the world a better place
make the world a better place
make the world a better place thank you
thank you
thank you [Applause]
”
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