undeFEETed | George Dennehy | TEDxYouth@RVA

a few summers ago I was at the beach I

a few summers ago I was at the beach I decided to go in the ocean to swim

decided to go in the ocean to swim

decided to go in the ocean to swim because I loved to swim after a while

because I loved to swim after a while

because I loved to swim after a while doing that I walked back up on shore and

doing that I walked back up on shore and

doing that I walked back up on shore and while I was walking back up I noticed

while I was walking back up I noticed

while I was walking back up I noticed this little girl with her family and she

this little girl with her family and she

this little girl with her family and she gave me this odd little look and then

gave me this odd little look and then

gave me this odd little look and then she said what’s wrong with you and I

she said what’s wrong with you and I

she said what’s wrong with you and I looked at her and I looked her right in

looked at her and I looked her right in

looked at her and I looked her right in the eyes and I said when I was your age

the eyes and I said when I was your age

the eyes and I said when I was your age I didn’t eat my vegetables

needless to say that freaked her out a

needless to say that freaked her out a little bit she looked at her parents and

little bit she looked at her parents and

little bit she looked at her parents and her parents just stood there did this

well I was born in Romania and as you

well I was born in Romania and as you can see I was born without arms straight

can see I was born without arms straight

can see I was born without arms straight from birth I was given up to an

from birth I was given up to an

from birth I was given up to an orphanage where I lived for the first

orphanage where I lived for the first

orphanage where I lived for the first three years of my life the conditions in

three years of my life the conditions in

three years of my life the conditions in the orphanage and the lack of care that

the orphanage and the lack of care that

the orphanage and the lack of care that I got left me in a very bad state

I got left me in a very bad state

I got left me in a very bad state but luckily at the age of three I was

but luckily at the age of three I was

but luckily at the age of three I was adopted by my family now

adopted by my family now

adopted by my family now at that point they picked me up for the

at that point they picked me up for the

at that point they picked me up for the first time and I weighed only nine

first time and I weighed only nine

first time and I weighed only nine pounds I was on the brink of dying and

pounds I was on the brink of dying and

pounds I was on the brink of dying and it looked to be a hopeless situation but

it looked to be a hopeless situation but

it looked to be a hopeless situation but as my life would have it I was adopted

as my life would have it I was adopted

as my life would have it I was adopted and rescued from that situation

and rescued from that situation

and rescued from that situation adoption saved my life as you can

adoption saved my life as you can

adoption saved my life as you can imagine growing up without arms and in

imagine growing up without arms and in

imagine growing up without arms and in my position there are a lot of

my position there are a lot of

my position there are a lot of challenges that I had to learn to face

challenges that I had to learn to face

challenges that I had to learn to face and to overcome just everyday things I

and to overcome just everyday things I

and to overcome just everyday things I had to learn to do that maybe you might

had to learn to do that maybe you might

had to learn to do that maybe you might take for granted like learning how to

take for granted like learning how to

take for granted like learning how to eat and hold a fork of my with my foot

eat and hold a fork of my with my foot

eat and hold a fork of my with my foot or getting changed or taking a shower or

or getting changed or taking a shower or

or getting changed or taking a shower or you know doing all that kind of stuff I

you know doing all that kind of stuff I

you know doing all that kind of stuff I had to learn how to do it my own way I

had to learn how to do it my own way I

had to learn how to do it my own way I always try to get the phrase across I’m

always try to get the phrase across I’m

always try to get the phrase across I’m different but not less you know one

different but not less you know one

different but not less you know one challenge in particular that I want to

challenge in particular that I want to

challenge in particular that I want to lay out for you I faced when I turned 15

lay out for you I faced when I turned 15

lay out for you I faced when I turned 15 and a half I was really excited about

and a half I was really excited about

and a half I was really excited about the idea of possibly driving a car as

the idea of possibly driving a car as

the idea of possibly driving a car as any teenager would be but the debate

any teenager would be but the debate

any teenager would be but the debate that I had was what I Drive a car that

that I had was what I Drive a car that

that I had was what I Drive a car that was modified for me or could I just

was modified for me or could I just

was modified for me or could I just drive a normal car with my feet I

drive a normal car with my feet I

drive a normal car with my feet I decided to try to figure out how to

decided to try to figure out how to

decided to try to figure out how to drive a car my own way because I you

drive a car my own way because I you

drive a car my own way because I you know knew that modifying a car would be

know knew that modifying a car would be

know knew that modifying a car would be really expensive for my parents and then

really expensive for my parents and then

really expensive for my parents and then that would also limit me to that one car

that would also limit me to that one car

that would also limit me to that one car so I decided and figured out that you

so I decided and figured out that you

so I decided and figured out that you know I could drive a car with this foot

know I could drive a car with this foot

know I could drive a car with this foot down on the gas and the brake and then

down on the gas and the brake and then

down on the gas and the brake and then just reach up and use this foot my

just reach up and use this foot my

just reach up and use this foot my license plate says armless guy so it

license plate says armless guy so it

license plate says armless guy so it gives you a warning if we’re on the road

gives you a warning if we’re on the road

gives you a warning if we’re on the road and you see me it’s a little warning

and you see me it’s a little warning

and you see me it’s a little warning but I’ll definitely wave to you with

but I’ll definitely wave to you with

but I’ll definitely wave to you with this old foot here but more so than the

this old foot here but more so than the

this old foot here but more so than the physical challenges of growing up

physical challenges of growing up

physical challenges of growing up without arms I want to focus in on the

without arms I want to focus in on the

without arms I want to focus in on the emotional aspect of being different in a

emotional aspect of being different in a

emotional aspect of being different in a public school

public school

public school you see I experienced a fair amount of

you see I experienced a fair amount of

you see I experienced a fair amount of bullying and name-calling and being

bullying and name-calling and being

bullying and name-calling and being picked on in middle school and in high

picked on in middle school and in high

picked on in middle school and in high school all I ever wanted to do was to

school all I ever wanted to do was to

school all I ever wanted to do was to fit in and to be accepted and to be

fit in and to be accepted and to be

fit in and to be accepted and to be loved that’s all we all want right but

loved that’s all we all want right but

loved that’s all we all want right but from day one I experienced what it went

from day one I experienced what it went

from day one I experienced what it went or what it meant to be different and to

or what it meant to be different and to

or what it meant to be different and to be treated different I remember this one

be treated different I remember this one

be treated different I remember this one instance where I was at lunch at the

instance where I was at lunch at the

instance where I was at lunch at the cafeteria and these kids walked by and

cafeteria and these kids walked by and

cafeteria and these kids walked by and they started laughing at me and pointing

they started laughing at me and pointing

they started laughing at me and pointing and you know they were like oh it’s

and you know they were like oh it’s

and you know they were like oh it’s gross take it food off the table and you

gross take it food off the table and you

gross take it food off the table and you know I was a 12 year old kid and that

know I was a 12 year old kid and that

know I was a 12 year old kid and that really really hurt and it hurts so much

really really hurt and it hurts so much

really really hurt and it hurts so much to the point where the more that

to the point where the more that

to the point where the more that happened I got to the point where I

happened I got to the point where I

happened I got to the point where I decided I’m just not gonna eat lunch at

decided I’m just not gonna eat lunch at

decided I’m just not gonna eat lunch at school because I’m so ashamed of the way

school because I’m so ashamed of the way

school because I’m so ashamed of the way I eat all this bullying all this being

I eat all this bullying all this being

I eat all this bullying all this being picked on this led me to be just

picked on this led me to be just

picked on this led me to be just shameful of Who I am I didn’t feel

shameful of Who I am I didn’t feel

shameful of Who I am I didn’t feel comfortable in my own skin all I wanted

comfortable in my own skin all I wanted

comfortable in my own skin all I wanted to do was to be different it was to be

to do was to be different it was to be

to do was to be different it was to be born

born

born with arms I reached a very low point in

with arms I reached a very low point in

with arms I reached a very low point in my life I became really depressed angry

my life I became really depressed angry

my life I became really depressed angry at everything suicidal I hated who I was

at everything suicidal I hated who I was

at everything suicidal I hated who I was but eventually I realized I realized

but eventually I realized I realized

but eventually I realized I realized that just because I don’t have arms

that just because I don’t have arms

that just because I don’t have arms doesn’t mean that I can’t fulfill my

doesn’t mean that I can’t fulfill my

doesn’t mean that I can’t fulfill my dreams I realized that just because I’m

dreams I realized that just because I’m

dreams I realized that just because I’m different it doesn’t mean that I’m less

different it doesn’t mean that I’m less

different it doesn’t mean that I’m less I realized that I have my family who’s

I realized that I have my family who’s

I realized that I have my family who’s there to support me I have my faith that

there to support me I have my faith that

there to support me I have my faith that gives me purpose and hope and if I

gives me purpose and hope and if I

gives me purpose and hope and if I choose it I have a fight and a will to

choose it I have a fight and a will to

choose it I have a fight and a will to persevere through any circumstances

persevere through any circumstances

persevere through any circumstances because at the end of the day I

because at the end of the day I

because at the end of the day I understood something and I and I

understood something and I and I

understood something and I and I understand it now that the only thing

understand it now that the only thing

understand it now that the only thing that can really get in my way the only

that can really get in my way the only

that can really get in my way the only thing that can really get in your way is

thing that can really get in your way is

thing that can really get in your way is yourself no matter what I go through no

yourself no matter what I go through no

yourself no matter what I go through no matter what we all go through

matter what we all go through

matter what we all go through we’re not alone in our struggles and

we’re not alone in our struggles and

we’re not alone in our struggles and when we face our struggles together

when we face our struggles together

when we face our struggles together anything’s possible we can get through

anything’s possible we can get through

anything’s possible we can get through anything so I want to share with you a

anything so I want to share with you a

anything so I want to share with you a song that I wrote called not abandoned

song that I wrote called not abandoned

song that I wrote called not abandoned and this is a reminder for me but maybe

and this is a reminder for me but maybe

and this is a reminder for me but maybe for you too that as you could navigate

for you too that as you could navigate

for you too that as you could navigate life and you go through struggles that

life and you go through struggles that

life and you go through struggles that you’re not abandoned so this is not

you’re not abandoned so this is not

you’re not abandoned so this is not abandoned I hope you enjoy it

three our wandering is

three our wandering is it out you’ve been here for as long as

it out you’ve been here for as long as

it out you’ve been here for as long as you can remember

you can remember

you can remember trapped inside

trapped inside

trapped inside this heart love shell

you’re not abandoned

you’re not abandoned you’re not

you’re not

you’re not there is a family that wants to make you

there is a family that wants to make you

there is a family that wants to make you there oh you’re gone falling down then

there oh you’re gone falling down then

there oh you’re gone falling down then I’ll miss broken road there is a pathway

I’ll miss broken road there is a pathway

I’ll miss broken road there is a pathway that’s gonna lead you home lead you home

you’re not abandoned you’re not alone

you’re not abandoned you’re not alone there is a family that wants to make you

there is a family that wants to make you

there is a family that wants to make you their own you’re gonna find out that all

their own you’re gonna find out that all

their own you’re gonna find out that all this broken road