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The Risk You Must Take | Dr. Kristen Lee | TEDxOcala


a few years ago my boss called to ask me

a few years ago my boss called to ask me a favor

a favor

a favor he’s like would you be interested in

he’s like would you be interested in

he’s like would you be interested in developing a new course for the

developing a new course for the

developing a new course for the university it’s right up your alley with

university it’s right up your alley with

university it’s right up your alley with your behavioral science background and

your behavioral science background and

your behavioral science background and clinical skills it’s exactly what they

clinical skills it’s exactly what they

clinical skills it’s exactly what they need apparently they were having trouble

need apparently they were having trouble

need apparently they were having trouble with some overachievers he told me that

with some overachievers he told me that

with some overachievers he told me that they were perfectionistic and wound

they were perfectionistic and wound

they were perfectionistic and wound tight and then he says you’d be the

tight and then he says you’d be the

tight and then he says you’d be the perfect role model for that so I’m like

perfect role model for that so I’m like

perfect role model for that so I’m like what’s the class and he tells me

what’s the class and he tells me

what’s the class and he tells me personal branding are you serious what

personal branding are you serious what

personal branding are you serious what do you want me to teach them some kind

do you want me to teach them some kind

do you want me to teach them some kind of creepy personal sales pitch

of creepy personal sales pitch

of creepy personal sales pitch that they have to start their own

that they have to start their own

that they have to start their own nonprofit by the time they’re 12 that

nonprofit by the time they’re 12 that

nonprofit by the time they’re 12 that they have to have the Kardashian rear

they have to have the Kardashian rear

they have to have the Kardashian rear end or that they can never let anyone

end or that they can never let anyone

end or that they can never let anyone see them sweat unless it’s to show off

see them sweat unless it’s to show off

see them sweat unless it’s to show off their hot yoga class that’s the last

their hot yoga class that’s the last

their hot yoga class that’s the last thing they need in a world where there’s

thing they need in a world where there’s

thing they need in a world where there’s even pressure to be Zen where

even pressure to be Zen where

even pressure to be Zen where mindfulness has become the new kale

the last thing I wanted was to teach

the last thing I wanted was to teach some kind of template for climbing the

some kind of template for climbing the

some kind of template for climbing the ladder especially not when I’d spent my

ladder especially not when I’d spent my

ladder especially not when I’d spent my entire career helping people get back on

entire career helping people get back on

entire career helping people get back on their feet after falling off of it

their feet after falling off of it

their feet after falling off of it before I could say no my boss says you

before I could say no my boss says you

before I could say no my boss says you can put your own spin on it so I say

can put your own spin on it so I say

can put your own spin on it so I say okay I didn’t want him to think bad at

okay I didn’t want him to think bad at

okay I didn’t want him to think bad at me so the first night of class comes and

me so the first night of class comes and

me so the first night of class comes and this guy walks in and he says where’s

this guy walks in and he says where’s

this guy walks in and he says where’s the professor I can’t find him it’s me

the professor I can’t find him it’s me

the professor I can’t find him it’s me have a seat the rest of the class goes

have a seat the rest of the class goes

have a seat the rest of the class goes huh and I’m like well I guess it’s safe

huh and I’m like well I guess it’s safe

huh and I’m like well I guess it’s safe to skip the icebreaker now besides that

to skip the icebreaker now besides that

to skip the icebreaker now besides that everybody else had shown up early

everybody else had shown up early

everybody else had shown up early sitting straight up at their desks all

sitting straight up at their desks all

sitting straight up at their desks all with their fresh copy of this authentic

with their fresh copy of this authentic

with their fresh copy of this authentic personal branding our textbook they had

personal branding our textbook they had

personal branding our textbook they had come ready to make a good first

come ready to make a good first

come ready to make a good first impression

impression

impression this one guy sits right in front of me

this one guy sits right in front of me

this one guy sits right in front of me like right where you are I can smell his

like right where you are I can smell his

like right where you are I can smell his minty breath you all know this guy right

minty breath you all know this guy right

minty breath you all know this guy right he’s got the perfectly iron polo the

he’s got the perfectly iron polo the

he’s got the perfectly iron polo the matchy Sox mr. perfect and when it’s his

matchy Sox mr. perfect and when it’s his

matchy Sox mr. perfect and when it’s his turn to introduce himself you’d think he

turn to introduce himself you’d think he

turn to introduce himself you’d think he had his resume tucked under his notebook

had his resume tucked under his notebook

had his resume tucked under his notebook he starts going off about the companies

he starts going off about the companies

he starts going off about the companies he’d started and his trophies and all

he’d started and his trophies and all

he’d started and his trophies and all the people he knew like he didn’t even

the people he knew like he didn’t even

the people he knew like he didn’t even need to be there with the rest of all of

need to be there with the rest of all of

need to be there with the rest of all of us because he already knew everybody and

us because he already knew everybody and

us because he already knew everybody and everything he was a classic humble

everything he was a classic humble

everything he was a classic humble bragger – the humble

the rest of my students were getting

the rest of my students were getting aggravated they were rolling their eyes

aggravated they were rolling their eyes

aggravated they were rolling their eyes but I could still tell that they were

but I could still tell that they were

but I could still tell that they were vying for their own airtime I was

vying for their own airtime I was

vying for their own airtime I was starting to feel more like a game show

starting to feel more like a game show

starting to feel more like a game show host and a graduate professor so he kept

host and a graduate professor so he kept

host and a graduate professor so he kept going on and on and I finally turned to

going on and on and I finally turned to

going on and on and I finally turned to him and I say hey it’s kind of not

him and I say hey it’s kind of not

him and I say hey it’s kind of not really about you it’s more than that so

really about you it’s more than that so

really about you it’s more than that so just so you know this wasn’t my best

just so you know this wasn’t my best

just so you know this wasn’t my best teaching moment but I didn’t think that

teaching moment but I didn’t think that

teaching moment but I didn’t think that I was gonna ever get through to my

I was gonna ever get through to my

I was gonna ever get through to my students for them to know what I want to

students for them to know what I want to

students for them to know what I want to talk with you about today that being

talk with you about today that being

talk with you about today that being real is the power skill of the century

real is the power skill of the century

real is the power skill of the century the risk we must take in a world that

the risk we must take in a world that

the risk we must take in a world that grooms us to show up airbrushed and act

grooms us to show up airbrushed and act

grooms us to show up airbrushed and act like puppets

like puppets

like puppets like human doings not beings research

like human doings not beings research

like human doings not beings research shows this is destroying us they say one

shows this is destroying us they say one

shows this is destroying us they say one in three of us can barely cope with the

in three of us can barely cope with the

in three of us can barely cope with the demands in this age of anxiety I was

demands in this age of anxiety I was

demands in this age of anxiety I was ready to call my boss and tell him I’m

ready to call my boss and tell him I’m

ready to call my boss and tell him I’m done call the whole thing off but then I

done call the whole thing off but then I

done call the whole thing off but then I started reading my students papers so

started reading my students papers so

started reading my students papers so they told me that authentic felt like a

they told me that authentic felt like a

they told me that authentic felt like a huge risk plus they were sick of

huge risk plus they were sick of

huge risk plus they were sick of authentic it felt like the new buzzword

authentic it felt like the new buzzword

authentic it felt like the new buzzword authentic leadership authentic parenting

authentic leadership authentic parenting

authentic leadership authentic parenting authentic living he didn’t feel like

authentic living he didn’t feel like

authentic living he didn’t feel like they could live up to it so I grabbed

they could live up to it so I grabbed

they could live up to it so I grabbed this notebook and I start writing down

this notebook and I start writing down

this notebook and I start writing down everything they’re telling me and I

everything they’re telling me and I

everything they’re telling me and I realize that they’re talking about what

realize that they’re talking about what

realize that they’re talking about what we call in psychology impostor syndrome

we call in psychology impostor syndrome

we call in psychology impostor syndrome how many of you have heard of it all

how many of you have heard of it all

how many of you have heard of it all right so it’s that feeling like

right so it’s that feeling like

right so it’s that feeling like someone’s gonna find you out like maybe

someone’s gonna find you out like maybe

someone’s gonna find you out like maybe they made a mistake when they gave you

they made a mistake when they gave you

they made a mistake when they gave you your spot like you’re just pretending to

your spot like you’re just pretending to

your spot like you’re just pretending to have it all together so I’m going

have it all together so I’m going

have it all together so I’m going through it all and I’m thinking like

through it all and I’m thinking like

through it all and I’m thinking like what can help me take a better approach

what can help me take a better approach

what can help me take a better approach in class I really want them to get this

in class I really want them to get this

in class I really want them to get this so what does any academic do in a

so what does any academic do in a

so what does any academic do in a situation like this you come up with an

situation like this you come up with an

situation like this you come up with an acronym so ready a C’s

asinine societal and self-imposed

asinine societal and self-imposed expectations oh you thought I was going

expectations oh you thought I was going

expectations oh you thought I was going to come up with better than that didn’t

to come up with better than that didn’t

to come up with better than that didn’t you I know it’s not the most scientific

you I know it’s not the most scientific

you I know it’s not the most scientific term but it fit the measuring sticks

term but it fit the measuring sticks

term but it fit the measuring sticks that they were using ridiculous and it

that they were using ridiculous and it

that they were using ridiculous and it was causing them to either hyper perform

was causing them to either hyper perform

was causing them to either hyper perform or bleach away the messy parts of their

or bleach away the messy parts of their

or bleach away the messy parts of their stories and to me

stories and to me

stories and to me this is sad being real shouldn’t even be

this is sad being real shouldn’t even be

this is sad being real shouldn’t even be a risk but these expectations they scare

a risk but these expectations they scare

a risk but these expectations they scare us into shrinking it to what we think is

us into shrinking it to what we think is

us into shrinking it to what we think is our place and then we don’t even have

our place and then we don’t even have

our place and then we don’t even have time to redirect ourselves they say that

time to redirect ourselves they say that

time to redirect ourselves they say that we’re all walking around with info

we’re all walking around with info

we’re all walking around with info obesity that we take in the equivalent

obesity that we take in the equivalent

obesity that we take in the equivalent of a hundred and seventy four newspapers

of a hundred and seventy four newspapers

of a hundred and seventy four newspapers a day and then spend hours stalking our

a day and then spend hours stalking our

a day and then spend hours stalking our social media feeds to see how many likes

social media feeds to see how many likes

social media feeds to see how many likes are filtered pictures get and I want to

are filtered pictures get and I want to

are filtered pictures get and I want to know today has anyone seen all of these

know today has anyone seen all of these

know today has anyone seen all of these Sephora and Ulta stores popping up can I

Sephora and Ulta stores popping up can I

Sephora and Ulta stores popping up can I hear you out there anyone seen this like

hear you out there anyone seen this like

hear you out there anyone seen this like they’re like Starbucks popping up

they’re like Starbucks popping up

they’re like Starbucks popping up everywhere I was reading the other day

everywhere I was reading the other day

everywhere I was reading the other day that they made 37 billion dollars in

that they made 37 billion dollars in

that they made 37 billion dollars in 2016

2016

2016 37 billion dollars to me that’s a lot of

37 billion dollars to me that’s a lot of

37 billion dollars to me that’s a lot of money to get that natural look so we say

money to get that natural look so we say

money to get that natural look so we say we’re after and then we wonder why we’re

we’re after and then we wonder why we’re

we’re after and then we wonder why we’re the most medicated obese addicted group

the most medicated obese addicted group

the most medicated obese addicted group ever the World Health Organization says

ever the World Health Organization says

ever the World Health Organization says by 2030 lifestyle sickness is going to

by 2030 lifestyle sickness is going to

by 2030 lifestyle sickness is going to trump communicable disease so we used to

trump communicable disease so we used to

trump communicable disease so we used to be all worried we were gonna catch stuff

be all worried we were gonna catch stuff

be all worried we were gonna catch stuff now it’s the stress and anxiety and all

now it’s the stress and anxiety and all

now it’s the stress and anxiety and all the numbing that comes with it my

the numbing that comes with it my

the numbing that comes with it my students Assis reminded me of the stuff

students Assis reminded me of the stuff

students Assis reminded me of the stuff that I used to see way back when I first

that I used to see way back when I first

that I used to see way back when I first started my clinical training so you know

started my clinical training so you know

started my clinical training so you know how it is

how it is

how it is school right there’s a lot of talk about

school right there’s a lot of talk about

school right there’s a lot of talk about best practice right and treating people

best practice right and treating people

best practice right and treating people well well my supervisor they gave me

well well my supervisor they gave me

well well my supervisor they gave me Mary she acted like she hated people so

Mary she acted like she hated people so

Mary she acted like she hated people so has anyone ever seen a teacher that

has anyone ever seen a teacher that

has anyone ever seen a teacher that screams at kids and you’re like like did

screams at kids and you’re like like did

screams at kids and you’re like like did you not read what color is your

you not read what color is your

you not read what color is your parachute book you know like come on so

parachute book you know like come on so

parachute book you know like come on so she was really the type that acted like

she was really the type that acted like

she was really the type that acted like everybody was a spotted puppy and she

everybody was a spotted puppy and she

everybody was a spotted puppy and she was Cruella De Vil ready to make her

was Cruella De Vil ready to make her

was Cruella De Vil ready to make her coat out of them and here I was the

coat out of them and here I was the

coat out of them and here I was the young clinician coming into her office

young clinician coming into her office

young clinician coming into her office all excited and eager to tell her all

all excited and eager to tell her all

all excited and eager to tell her all about the people that I was working with

about the people that I was working with

about the people that I was working with and the potential I saw in them and Mary

she was checked out

she was checked out she seemed much more interested in her

she seemed much more interested in her

she seemed much more interested in her Dunkin Donuts coffee and bagel with that

Dunkin Donuts coffee and bagel with that

Dunkin Donuts coffee and bagel with that three-inch thick cream cheese since she

three-inch thick cream cheese since she

three-inch thick cream cheese since she did talking about good qualities in

did talking about good qualities in

did talking about good qualities in people she was like a catatonic negative

people she was like a catatonic negative

people she was like a catatonic negative hotline if you were to call her this is

hotline if you were to call her this is

hotline if you were to call her this is what you’d get if you think people will

what you’d get if you think people will

what you’d get if you think people will never change press one

if you think people just love being

if you think people just love being victims press 2 if you like to rub

victims press 2 if you like to rub

victims press 2 if you like to rub people’s noses in their own messes press

people’s noses in their own messes press

people’s noses in their own messes press 3 are you kidding me that’s the best you

3 are you kidding me that’s the best you

3 are you kidding me that’s the best you got after all those years in the field I

got after all those years in the field I

got after all those years in the field I needed something more than that like a

needed something more than that like a

needed something more than that like a StrengthsFinder hotline to help me out

StrengthsFinder hotline to help me out

StrengthsFinder hotline to help me out press 1 to stop labeling press 2 to

press 1 to stop labeling press 2 to

press 1 to stop labeling press 2 to separate the person from the problem

separate the person from the problem

separate the person from the problem they’re not the same press 3 if you

they’re not the same press 3 if you

they’re not the same press 3 if you think shaming people stinks press 0 if

think shaming people stinks press 0 if

think shaming people stinks press 0 if you need a new supervisor

it’d be very easy to rant about Mary but

it’d be very easy to rant about Mary but she was not a pioneer in this method

she was not a pioneer in this method

she was not a pioneer in this method it’s the way old-school psychology has

it’s the way old-school psychology has

it’s the way old-school psychology has always done business on the hunt for

always done business on the hunt for

always done business on the hunt for what’s wrong and broken and then we have

what’s wrong and broken and then we have

what’s wrong and broken and then we have all these romantic ideas about setbacks

all these romantic ideas about setbacks

all these romantic ideas about setbacks and comebacks and bootstraps without

and comebacks and bootstraps without

and comebacks and bootstraps without ever talking honestly about what we need

ever talking honestly about what we need

ever talking honestly about what we need to overcome in the first place we act

to overcome in the first place we act

to overcome in the first place we act like the toxic ways that we shut each

like the toxic ways that we shut each

like the toxic ways that we shut each other down because of race class gender

other down because of race class gender

other down because of race class gender orientation age ability size religion

orientation age ability size religion

orientation age ability size religion like none of that had anything to do

like none of that had anything to do

like none of that had anything to do with how well we’re doing and whether

with how well we’re doing and whether

with how well we’re doing and whether it’s even safe to be ourselves we start

it’s even safe to be ourselves we start

it’s even safe to be ourselves we start believing that being real is too great a

believing that being real is too great a

believing that being real is too great a risk the society’s definition of normal

risk the society’s definition of normal

risk the society’s definition of normal is real like Alan Schurman put it a

is real like Alan Schurman put it a

is real like Alan Schurman put it a normal person is the sort of person that

normal person is the sort of person that

normal person is the sort of person that might be designed by a committee

everybody puts in there pretty color and

everybody puts in there pretty color and then it comes out gray my students were

then it comes out gray my students were

then it comes out gray my students were far from gray they were colorful

far from gray they were colorful

far from gray they were colorful recovering try too hard it’s what made

recovering try too hard it’s what made

recovering try too hard it’s what made them interesting and resilient and

them interesting and resilient and

them interesting and resilient and beautiful they were done with fake it to

beautiful they were done with fake it to

beautiful they were done with fake it to you make it and I was starting to

you make it and I was starting to

you make it and I was starting to realize that they were just as much my

realize that they were just as much my

realize that they were just as much my teachers as I was theirs so I did the

teachers as I was theirs so I did the

teachers as I was theirs so I did the next thing in academic does I filled out

next thing in academic does I filled out

next thing in academic does I filled out an IRB the application that I needed to

an IRB the application that I needed to

an IRB the application that I needed to conduct human research now this personal

conduct human research now this personal

conduct human research now this personal branding class I wanted nothing to do

branding class I wanted nothing to do

branding class I wanted nothing to do with had become the basis for a

with had become the basis for a

with had become the basis for a three-year study with hundreds of my

three-year study with hundreds of my

three-year study with hundreds of my students from across the world to try to

students from across the world to try to

students from across the world to try to get us a little closer to authentic

get us a little closer to authentic

get us a little closer to authentic so when I first started I thought that

so when I first started I thought that

so when I first started I thought that Albert bandura the social psychologist

Albert bandura the social psychologist

Albert bandura the social psychologist you know him so he has this theory of

you know him so he has this theory of

you know him so he has this theory of self-efficacy and I thought it was the

self-efficacy and I thought it was the

self-efficacy and I thought it was the secret sauce right so self-efficacy

secret sauce right so self-efficacy

secret sauce right so self-efficacy basically says if you think you can

basically says if you think you can

basically says if you think you can reach a goal you’re more likely to set

reach a goal you’re more likely to set

reach a goal you’re more likely to set it and then go on to reach it seems

it and then go on to reach it seems

it and then go on to reach it seems pretty common sense right but besides my

pretty common sense right but besides my

pretty common sense right but besides my humble bragger

humble bragger

humble bragger my students had already moved way past

my students had already moved way past

my students had already moved way past that they had moved from me to we so I

that they had moved from me to we so I

that they had moved from me to we so I started to call this collective efficacy

started to call this collective efficacy

started to call this collective efficacy the idea that an injury to one is an

the idea that an injury to one is an

the idea that an injury to one is an injury to all when you heard I heard and

injury to all when you heard I heard and

injury to all when you heard I heard and when you’re on top of the world

when you’re on top of the world

when you’re on top of the world that’s so am i it allows us to see each

that’s so am i it allows us to see each

that’s so am i it allows us to see each other and to be real about our strengths

other and to be real about our strengths

other and to be real about our strengths and struggles and to stop using

and struggles and to stop using

and struggles and to stop using society’s definitions that don’t begin

society’s definitions that don’t begin

society’s definitions that don’t begin to capture what we’re capable of

to capture what we’re capable of

to capture what we’re capable of together when my students learn to be

together when my students learn to be

together when my students learn to be just as proud of their scars as they

just as proud of their scars as they

just as proud of their scars as they were their trophies they begin to get

were their trophies they begin to get

were their trophies they begin to get rid of these they started to care more

rid of these they started to care more

rid of these they started to care more about the greater good than their own

about the greater good than their own

about the greater good than their own image it was all over my data that when

image it was all over my data that when

image it was all over my data that when we take the risk of being real it allows

we take the risk of being real it allows

we take the risk of being real it allows us to heal and help each other to do the

us to heal and help each other to do the

us to heal and help each other to do the same so I was all ready to package this

same so I was all ready to package this

same so I was all ready to package this up put it in a white paper and call it a

up put it in a white paper and call it a

up put it in a white paper and call it a day

day

day but I knew I needed to do more so I left

but I knew I needed to do more so I left

but I knew I needed to do more so I left work on a Monday without telling anyone

work on a Monday without telling anyone

work on a Monday without telling anyone where I was going to meet with Lyla my

where I was going to meet with Lyla my

where I was going to meet with Lyla my new therapist her first I fed her the

new therapist her first I fed her the

new therapist her first I fed her the sanitized version crazy job to teenagers

sanitized version crazy job to teenagers

sanitized version crazy job to teenagers I just need some strategies I got to get

I just need some strategies I got to get

I just need some strategies I got to get back to work and Lyla was like

back to work and Lyla was like

back to work and Lyla was like it sounds to me like you’re a

it sounds to me like you’re a

it sounds to me like you’re a perfectionist I nodded so she wouldn’t

perfectionist I nodded so she wouldn’t

perfectionist I nodded so she wouldn’t think bad at me and then I swore at

think bad at me and then I swore at

think bad at me and then I swore at myself on the way out of her office I

myself on the way out of her office I

myself on the way out of her office I didn’t want to go back there it’s too

didn’t want to go back there it’s too

didn’t want to go back there it’s too much work but I did and it was hard but

much work but I did and it was hard but

much work but I did and it was hard but Lila helped me realize I couldn’t keep

Lila helped me realize I couldn’t keep

Lila helped me realize I couldn’t keep showing up airbrushed if I was asking my

showing up airbrushed if I was asking my

showing up airbrushed if I was asking my students not to so I started to talk

students not to so I started to talk

students not to so I started to talk publicly about my lifelong battle with

publicly about my lifelong battle with

publicly about my lifelong battle with anxiety the first time I did it was at

anxiety the first time I did it was at

anxiety the first time I did it was at work in front of everyone that I never

work in front of everyone that I never

work in front of everyone that I never feel like I’m enough that I’m always

feel like I’m enough that I’m always

feel like I’m enough that I’m always letting someone down that my smile and

letting someone down that my smile and

letting someone down that my smile and mani/pedi and letters after my name tell

mani/pedi and letters after my name tell

mani/pedi and letters after my name tell you nothing about my self sabotaging

you nothing about my self sabotaging

you nothing about my self sabotaging brain it never shuts down I have really

brain it never shuts down I have really

brain it never shuts down I have really low Mouse and part of the reason I

low Mouse and part of the reason I

low Mouse and part of the reason I became a therapist was because I know

became a therapist was because I know

became a therapist was because I know firsthand about dark emotions and

firsthand about dark emotions and

firsthand about dark emotions and balance the only balance in my life is

balance the only balance in my life is

balance the only balance in my life is that I try to do everything perfect when

that I try to do everything perfect when

that I try to do everything perfect when I was done I thought I had committed

I was done I thought I had committed

I was done I thought I had committed professional suicide

professional suicide

professional suicide now I’d help them find me out and when I

now I’d help them find me out and when I

now I’d help them find me out and when I went back to work my colleagues were

went back to work my colleagues were

went back to work my colleagues were like that’s exactly how I feel but I was

like that’s exactly how I feel but I was

like that’s exactly how I feel but I was afraid to say it I thought it was just

afraid to say it I thought it was just

afraid to say it I thought it was just me thank you for saying

being real doesn’t mean I never care

being real doesn’t mean I never care what people think

what people think

what people think I still wear makeup and sometimes take

I still wear makeup and sometimes take

I still wear makeup and sometimes take selfies it also doesn’t mean that I have

selfies it also doesn’t mean that I have

selfies it also doesn’t mean that I have to wear all my emotions on my sleeve or

to wear all my emotions on my sleeve or

to wear all my emotions on my sleeve or broadcast all of my ruminations that

broadcast all of my ruminations that

broadcast all of my ruminations that wouldn’t be safe and trust me it would

wouldn’t be safe and trust me it would

wouldn’t be safe and trust me it would be annoying it’s more than that being

be annoying it’s more than that being

be annoying it’s more than that being real is about kicking your asses out so

real is about kicking your asses out so

real is about kicking your asses out so you don’t risk the chance to live an

you don’t risk the chance to live an

you don’t risk the chance to live an authentic life you’ve asked yourself

authentic life you’ve asked yourself

authentic life you’ve asked yourself this before right what’s the point of

this before right what’s the point of

this before right what’s the point of living a fake life who is it for

after all my talks with Lila and my

after all my talks with Lila and my students I was thinking about my humble

students I was thinking about my humble

students I was thinking about my humble bragger for my first class my boss’s

bragger for my first class my boss’s

bragger for my first class my boss’s boss called to tell me he’d applied for

boss called to tell me he’d applied for

boss called to tell me he’d applied for a job where I work but when they went to

a job where I work but when they went to

a job where I work but when they went to check out his references they found out

check out his references they found out

check out his references they found out that the companies he worked the

that the companies he worked the

that the companies he worked the trophy’s the people he knew the places

trophy’s the people he knew the places

trophy’s the people he knew the places he’d went it was all a lie none of it

he’d went it was all a lie none of it

he’d went it was all a lie none of it was true so sad he’d wasted all this

was true so sad he’d wasted all this

was true so sad he’d wasted all this time promoting his fake self and we

time promoting his fake self and we

time promoting his fake self and we never got to know the real guy the one

never got to know the real guy the one

never got to know the real guy the one we would have loved to have known the

we would have loved to have known the

we would have loved to have known the one who could have made a real

one who could have made a real

one who could have made a real difference with all of his talents our

difference with all of his talents our

difference with all of his talents our bumps and bruises and wrinkles and scars

bumps and bruises and wrinkles and scars

bumps and bruises and wrinkles and scars are not meant to be airbrushed this is

are not meant to be airbrushed this is

are not meant to be airbrushed this is the risk you must take showing up has to

the risk you must take showing up has to

the risk you must take showing up has to reel you it might feel raw and

reel you it might feel raw and

reel you it might feel raw and terrifying and counterintuitive and like

terrifying and counterintuitive and like

terrifying and counterintuitive and like it’s the biggest risk you’ve ever taken

it’s the biggest risk you’ve ever taken

it’s the biggest risk you’ve ever taken but the risk of not doing so is greater

because just like I once told my humble

because just like I once told my humble bragger

bragger

bragger it’s kind of not really about you it’s

it’s kind of not really about you it’s

it’s kind of not really about you it’s more than that

”

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