[Applause] for as long as I can remember I’ve loved
for as long as I can remember I’ve loved
for as long as I can remember I’ve loved words when I was 9 I found Kent 10 in
words when I was 9 I found Kent 10 in
words when I was 9 I found Kent 10 in China for the final round in every show
China for the final round in every show
China for the final round in every show is the countdown conundrum a nine-letter
is the countdown conundrum a nine-letter
is the countdown conundrum a nine-letter anagram to be solved on the buzzer
anagram to be solved on the buzzer
anagram to be solved on the buzzer inside 30 seconds as the years pass
inside 30 seconds as the years pass
inside 30 seconds as the years pass watching this every week I became
watching this every week I became
watching this every week I became fascinated by the sheer number of these
fascinated by the sheer number of these
fascinated by the sheer number of these nine letter words in the English
nine letter words in the English
nine letter words in the English language prototype landscape tarantula
language prototype landscape tarantula
language prototype landscape tarantula marmalade tonight I want to talk about
marmalade tonight I want to talk about
marmalade tonight I want to talk about possibly the biggest 9 that a word of
possibly the biggest 9 that a word of
possibly the biggest 9 that a word of all happiness happiness is a concept
all happiness happiness is a concept
all happiness happiness is a concept that has occupied the minds of our
that has occupied the minds of our
that has occupied the minds of our greatest thinkers for thousands of years
greatest thinkers for thousands of years
greatest thinkers for thousands of years everyone from Aristotle to Gandhi it
everyone from Aristotle to Gandhi it
everyone from Aristotle to Gandhi it made the code for the American
made the code for the American
made the code for the American Declaration of Independence but even
Declaration of Independence but even
Declaration of Independence but even there it’s frustratingly out of reach
there it’s frustratingly out of reach
there it’s frustratingly out of reach the pursuit of happiness who am I to
the pursuit of happiness who am I to
the pursuit of happiness who am I to talk about happiness I’m not a doctor
talk about happiness I’m not a doctor
talk about happiness I’m not a doctor psychologist or scientist but for years
psychologist or scientist but for years
psychologist or scientist but for years I had no idea of what happiness was I
I had no idea of what happiness was I
I had no idea of what happiness was I lived every day between a past I
lived every day between a past I
lived every day between a past I couldn’t change and a future I couldn’t
couldn’t change and a future I couldn’t
couldn’t change and a future I couldn’t control eventually this mentality sucked
control eventually this mentality sucked
control eventually this mentality sucked me into darkness while outwardly I
me into darkness while outwardly I
me into darkness while outwardly I presented a happy exterior everywhere
presented a happy exterior everywhere
presented a happy exterior everywhere from empty churches to Starbucks toilets
from empty churches to Starbucks toilets
from empty churches to Starbucks toilets became a refuge for my tears I was
became a refuge for my tears I was
became a refuge for my tears I was diagnosed with depression three years
diagnosed with depression three years
diagnosed with depression three years ago what is depression to me depression
ago what is depression to me depression
ago what is depression to me depression was a dense gray fog that settled over
was a dense gray fog that settled over
was a dense gray fog that settled over every single thing every single day
every single thing every single day
every single thing every single day it brought a complete lack of clarity
it brought a complete lack of clarity
it brought a complete lack of clarity direction energy motivation eventually
direction energy motivation eventually
direction energy motivation eventually that could predict a very posh and a
that could predict a very posh and a
that could predict a very posh and a complete lack of self-worth and in a
complete lack of self-worth and in a
complete lack of self-worth and in a country where 1 in 12 people deal with
country where 1 in 12 people deal with
country where 1 in 12 people deal with depression at any one time where there
depression at any one time where there
depression at any one time where there are 2 million prescriptions for
are 2 million prescriptions for
are 2 million prescriptions for antidepressants written every year I
antidepressants written every year I
antidepressants written every year I felt so alone talking to doctors and
felt so alone talking to doctors and
felt so alone talking to doctors and counselors helped but when I left those
counselors helped but when I left those
counselors helped but when I left those rooms I reacted the veneer for ones bad
rooms I reacted the veneer for ones bad
rooms I reacted the veneer for ones bad off work the doctor sir tread gas
off work the doctor sir tread gas
off work the doctor sir tread gas stroe enteritis because he said no one
stroe enteritis because he said no one
stroe enteritis because he said no one would question gastroenteritis I had
would question gastroenteritis I had
would question gastroenteritis I had agreed to – it was essential to me that
agreed to – it was essential to me that
agreed to – it was essential to me that no one knew antidepressants were
no one knew antidepressants were
no one knew antidepressants were recommended but they didn’t feel right
recommended but they didn’t feel right
recommended but they didn’t feel right for me for one it felt much too quick
for me for one it felt much too quick
for me for one it felt much too quick the prescription was written inside 10
the prescription was written inside 10
the prescription was written inside 10 minutes for another while there were
minutes for another while there were
minutes for another while there were many many days I felt that the world was
many many days I felt that the world was
many many days I felt that the world was certainly no better off for having me in
certainly no better off for having me in
certainly no better off for having me in it I wasn’t actively suicidal no
it I wasn’t actively suicidal no
it I wasn’t actively suicidal no antidepressants might treat the symptoms
antidepressants might treat the symptoms
antidepressants might treat the symptoms but I needed to find a cause my
but I needed to find a cause my
but I needed to find a cause my breakthrough came with one small
breakthrough came with one small
breakthrough came with one small positive step a challenge from my wife
positive step a challenge from my wife
positive step a challenge from my wife Lorraine during one extended depressive
Lorraine during one extended depressive
Lorraine during one extended depressive episode to do one thing to take a shower
episode to do one thing to take a shower
episode to do one thing to take a shower every morning for a week I managed it
every morning for a week I managed it
every morning for a week I managed it this showed me that action was possible
this showed me that action was possible
this showed me that action was possible and that action got results so I decided
and that action got results so I decided
and that action got results so I decided to examine all the actions of my life
to examine all the actions of my life
to examine all the actions of my life and all the choices choices that lay
and all the choices choices that lay
and all the choices choices that lay behind those actions I believe that it’s
behind those actions I believe that it’s
behind those actions I believe that it’s very difficult for us when we’re feeling
very difficult for us when we’re feeling
very difficult for us when we’re feeling low to get up in the morning and just
low to get up in the morning and just
low to get up in the morning and just choose to be happy but I also feel that
choose to be happy but I also feel that
choose to be happy but I also feel that our choices have a massive bearing on
our choices have a massive bearing on
our choices have a massive bearing on our happiness one of my choices was
our happiness one of my choices was
our happiness one of my choices was about depression that I must be hidden
about depression that I must be hidden
about depression that I must be hidden but I realized that hiding the problem
but I realized that hiding the problem
but I realized that hiding the problem was doing very little to solve it so I
was doing very little to solve it so I
was doing very little to solve it so I started to talk a strange thing happened
started to talk a strange thing happened
started to talk a strange thing happened suddenly I wasn’t alone suddenly
suddenly I wasn’t alone suddenly
suddenly I wasn’t alone suddenly conversations were happening everywhere
conversations were happening everywhere
conversations were happening everywhere many of them weren’t men who had felt
many of them weren’t men who had felt
many of them weren’t men who had felt the same way as I had and like me hadn’t
the same way as I had and like me hadn’t
the same way as I had and like me hadn’t been able to express it and I found in
been able to express it and I found in
been able to express it and I found in these honest conversations the most
these honest conversations the most
these honest conversations the most powerful drug I’ve ever known now I’m
powerful drug I’ve ever known now I’m
powerful drug I’ve ever known now I’m grateful every single day I’m grateful
grateful every single day I’m grateful
grateful every single day I’m grateful to have found new friendships all over
to have found new friendships all over
to have found new friendships all over the world I’m grateful to have the
the world I’m grateful to have the
the world I’m grateful to have the strength in my legs to stand here and
strength in my legs to stand here and
strength in my legs to stand here and strengthen my lungs to speak and I
strengthen my lungs to speak and I
strengthen my lungs to speak and I realized that happiness is so much less
realized that happiness is so much less
realized that happiness is so much less about having and so much more about
about having and so much more about
about having and so much more about doing and being and every day what we do
doing and being and every day what we do
doing and being and every day what we do and who we are our choices Netflix or
and who we are our choices Netflix or
and who we are our choices Netflix or one extra hour of sleep
one extra hour of sleep
one extra hour of sleep worrying about tomorrow or committing
worrying about tomorrow or committing
worrying about tomorrow or committing 100% to be in the moment today being the
100% to be in the moment today being the
100% to be in the moment today being the person that people expect you to be or
person that people expect you to be or
person that people expect you to be or finding out who you really are and being
finding out who you really are and being
finding out who you really are and being yourself
yourself
yourself and I think if we can just commit to a
and I think if we can just commit to a
and I think if we can just commit to a series of small positive choices we
series of small positive choices we
series of small positive choices we might find some more 9 that are words we
might find some more 9 that are words we
might find some more 9 that are words we might find that we can be more authentic
might find that we can be more authentic
might find that we can be more authentic that we can have more integrity that we
that we can have more integrity that we
that we can have more integrity that we can give more enjoyment and maybe
can give more enjoyment and maybe
can give more enjoyment and maybe experience happiness thank you
experience happiness thank you
experience happiness thank you [Applause]
”
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