I have a job you don’t want to have I evaluate and treat serious sex offenders
evaluate and treat serious sex offenders
evaluate and treat serious sex offenders as part of my practice if it’s a
as part of my practice if it’s a
as part of my practice if it’s a psychologist that includes serial child
psychologist that includes serial child
psychologist that includes serial child rapists adult sexual abusers and people
rapists adult sexual abusers and people
rapists adult sexual abusers and people designated by the state of Washington as
designated by the state of Washington as
designated by the state of Washington as sexually violent predators
sexually violent predators
sexually violent predators nobody likes sex offenders even gang
nobody likes sex offenders even gang
nobody likes sex offenders even gang members and murderers don’t like sex
members and murderers don’t like sex
members and murderers don’t like sex offenders sex offenders are the people
offenders sex offenders are the people
offenders sex offenders are the people who are most likely to be physically and
who are most likely to be physically and
who are most likely to be physically and sexually abused in incarceration they’re
sexually abused in incarceration they’re
sexually abused in incarceration they’re the last people you want in your
the last people you want in your
the last people you want in your community and that is exactly why I
community and that is exactly why I
community and that is exactly why I think we need to talk about them because
think we need to talk about them because
think we need to talk about them because the way that we think and act toward the
the way that we think and act toward the
the way that we think and act toward the people that we fear and dislike the most
people that we fear and dislike the most
people that we fear and dislike the most says something about us as a society so
says something about us as a society so
says something about us as a society so I’d like to talk about some of our fears
I’d like to talk about some of our fears
I’d like to talk about some of our fears and which ones are true and which ones
and which ones are true and which ones
and which ones are true and which ones aren’t because fear has a tremendous
aren’t because fear has a tremendous
aren’t because fear has a tremendous amount to do with how we live our daily
amount to do with how we live our daily
amount to do with how we live our daily lives the thing that I think causes us
lives the thing that I think causes us
lives the thing that I think causes us the most fear and distress when we think
the most fear and distress when we think
the most fear and distress when we think about child sexual abuse is the idea of
about child sexual abuse is the idea of
about child sexual abuse is the idea of a child being abducted by a stranger and
a child being abducted by a stranger and
a child being abducted by a stranger and abused and rightly so from invoking that
abused and rightly so from invoking that
abused and rightly so from invoking that fear we have about seventy four million
fear we have about seventy four million
fear we have about seventy four million minors in the United States and I’d like
minors in the United States and I’d like
minors in the United States and I’d like you to just take a guess for how many
you to just take a guess for how many
you to just take a guess for how many child abductors by strangers there are
child abductors by strangers there are
child abductors by strangers there are each year I’m guessing you said probably
each year I’m guessing you said probably
each year I’m guessing you said probably several thousand or tens of thousand and
several thousand or tens of thousand and
several thousand or tens of thousand and here’s the real number it’s about a
here’s the real number it’s about a
here’s the real number it’s about a hundred when we think about child sexual
hundred when we think about child sexual
hundred when we think about child sexual abuse we automatically go to the
abuse we automatically go to the
abuse we automatically go to the stranger danger scenario we spend a
stranger danger scenario we spend a
stranger danger scenario we spend a tremendous amount of time taking care of
tremendous amount of time taking care of
tremendous amount of time taking care of our children and keeping them from for
our children and keeping them from for
our children and keeping them from for direct physical harm we escort them to
direct physical harm we escort them to
direct physical harm we escort them to the school bus station stop and we stay
the school bus station stop and we stay
the school bus station stop and we stay there until the bus arrives we plan
there until the bus arrives we plan
there until the bus arrives we plan playdates and so that they know where
playdates and so that they know where
playdates and so that they know where they’re going and we drop them off but
they’re going and we drop them off but
they’re going and we drop them off but we don’t give our children the chance to
we don’t give our children the chance to
we don’t give our children the chance to go down the street to see if their
go down the street to see if their
go down the street to see if their friends Emily and Jacob are free to play
friends Emily and Jacob are free to play
friends Emily and Jacob are free to play this is not what happens in a lot of the
this is not what happens in a lot of the
this is not what happens in a lot of the rest of the world and much of the rest
rest of the world and much of the rest
rest of the world and much of the rest of the world they raised their children
of the world they raised their children
of the world they raised their children like we did in the American in America
like we did in the American in America
like we did in the American in America in the 60s and 70s using what we would
in the 60s and 70s using what we would
in the 60s and 70s using what we would think of as free range parenting
think of as free range parenting
think of as free range parenting techniques when you look at this
techniques when you look at this
techniques when you look at this mystics of children who are declared
mystics of children who are declared
mystics of children who are declared missing by law enforcement less than 1%
missing by law enforcement less than 1%
missing by law enforcement less than 1% of those children have been abducted by
of those children have been abducted by
of those children have been abducted by strangers the vast majority of child
strangers the vast majority of child
strangers the vast majority of child abductions are done by parents who have
abductions are done by parents who have
abductions are done by parents who have lost custody of their children and want
lost custody of their children and want
lost custody of their children and want the possession back I don’t want to
the possession back I don’t want to
the possession back I don’t want to underestimate how horrible child
underestimate how horrible child
underestimate how horrible child abduction by stranger is I can’t think
abduction by stranger is I can’t think
abduction by stranger is I can’t think of anything worse that could possibly
of anything worse that could possibly
of anything worse that could possibly have to a family happen to a family or
have to a family happen to a family or
have to a family happen to a family or child but the branch of the US
child but the branch of the US
child but the branch of the US Department of Justice that keeps
Department of Justice that keeps
Department of Justice that keeps statistics on sex offenders will tell
statistics on sex offenders will tell
statistics on sex offenders will tell you that the perpetrator of the
you that the perpetrator of the
you that the perpetrator of the perpetrators of sexual abuse 90% of them
perpetrators of sexual abuse 90% of them
perpetrators of sexual abuse 90% of them are known to the child before the abuse
are known to the child before the abuse
are known to the child before the abuse happens 30% of them are family 60% are
happens 30% of them are family 60% are
happens 30% of them are family 60% are friends and neighbors only 10% of them
friends and neighbors only 10% of them
friends and neighbors only 10% of them are strangers this tells us that the
are strangers this tells us that the
are strangers this tells us that the model of stranger danger
model of stranger danger
model of stranger danger doesn’t hold up you have far more to be
doesn’t hold up you have far more to be
doesn’t hold up you have far more to be concerned about with the other people
concerned about with the other people
concerned about with the other people who are in your children’s lives if you
who are in your children’s lives if you
who are in your children’s lives if you don’t know them well then you have from
don’t know them well then you have from
don’t know them well then you have from strangers this brings up a question to
strangers this brings up a question to
strangers this brings up a question to me are cui catastrophizing with the
me are cui catastrophizing with the
me are cui catastrophizing with the worst case but extraordinarily rare
worst case but extraordinarily rare
worst case but extraordinarily rare scenario rather than letting our
scenario rather than letting our
scenario rather than letting our children learn a lot of lessons of
children learn a lot of lessons of
children learn a lot of lessons of Independence what is the choice that we
Independence what is the choice that we
Independence what is the choice that we are making a society about this issue
the internet is changing the way that we
the internet is changing the way that we also think about sex offenses one of the
also think about sex offenses one of the
also think about sex offenses one of the biggest issue that I and other treatment
biggest issue that I and other treatment
biggest issue that I and other treatment providers are running into is that about
providers are running into is that about
providers are running into is that about 20% of teenagers are sending nude
20% of teenagers are sending nude
20% of teenagers are sending nude selfies to each other that’s actually
selfies to each other that’s actually
selfies to each other that’s actually one of the first steps they have in
one of the first steps they have in
one of the first steps they have in getting to know each other in hookup
getting to know each other in hookup
getting to know each other in hookup culture so the way it typically works is
culture so the way it typically works is
culture so the way it typically works is that a young teenage male is going to
that a young teenage male is going to
that a young teenage male is going to send a nude picture of themselves to
send a nude picture of themselves to
send a nude picture of themselves to someone and then request a picture back
someone and then request a picture back
someone and then request a picture back and sometimes they will get one back and
and sometimes they will get one back and
and sometimes they will get one back and sometimes they won’t but that means that
sometimes they won’t but that means that
sometimes they won’t but that means that they are now involved in production of
they are now involved in production of
they are now involved in production of child pornography transmission of child
child pornography transmission of child
child pornography transmission of child pornography and possession of child
pornography and possession of child
pornography and possession of child pornography and furthermore if one
pornography and furthermore if one
pornography and furthermore if one person is in Vancouver Washington and
person is in Vancouver Washington and
person is in Vancouver Washington and their friend is across the Columbia
their friend is across the Columbia
their friend is across the Columbia River in
River in
River in Rutland Oregon it’s now interstate and
Rutland Oregon it’s now interstate and
Rutland Oregon it’s now interstate and you’ve got federal charges now if you
you’ve got federal charges now if you
you’ve got federal charges now if you talk to one of these teenagers and say
talk to one of these teenagers and say
talk to one of these teenagers and say would you drop your pants in public and
would you drop your pants in public and
would you drop your pants in public and let everybody see your but you’ve got
let everybody see your but you’ve got
let everybody see your but you’ve got they probably say no of course not and
they probably say no of course not and
they probably say no of course not and they get really confused when you say
they get really confused when you say
they get really confused when you say okay well then why is this okay to do
okay well then why is this okay to do
okay well then why is this okay to do electronically so the thing is that the
electronically so the thing is that the
electronically so the thing is that the nature of what we’re now thinking about
nature of what we’re now thinking about
nature of what we’re now thinking about as sex offenses is changing rapidly in
as sex offenses is changing rapidly in
as sex offenses is changing rapidly in the past 20 years because of the advent
the past 20 years because of the advent
the past 20 years because of the advent of the Internet so why do sex offenses
of the Internet so why do sex offenses
of the Internet so why do sex offenses matter to us as a community the answer
matter to us as a community the answer
matter to us as a community the answer is the numbers themselves these numbers
is the numbers themselves these numbers
is the numbers themselves these numbers are from the Centers of Disease Control
are from the Centers of Disease Control
are from the Centers of Disease Control their estimation is that by the age of
their estimation is that by the age of
their estimation is that by the age of 18 one in six boys and one of four girls
18 one in six boys and one of four girls
18 one in six boys and one of four girls have somehow been sexually abused they
have somehow been sexually abused they
have somehow been sexually abused they also estimate that 18 percent of all
also estimate that 18 percent of all
also estimate that 18 percent of all adult women have been raped and only 16
adult women have been raped and only 16
adult women have been raped and only 16 percent of rapes are actually reported
percent of rapes are actually reported
percent of rapes are actually reported to law enforcement seventy-five percent
to law enforcement seventy-five percent
to law enforcement seventy-five percent of rapists are known to the adult women
of rapists are known to the adult women
of rapists are known to the adult women who are raped and what this says is that
who are raped and what this says is that
who are raped and what this says is that a lot of our conceptualizations of how
a lot of our conceptualizations of how
a lot of our conceptualizations of how sexual abuse happens in our society are
sexual abuse happens in our society are
sexual abuse happens in our society are inadequate they are not accurate so the
inadequate they are not accurate so the
inadequate they are not accurate so the numbers are staggering and it means that
numbers are staggering and it means that
numbers are staggering and it means that we really need to rethink about the way
we really need to rethink about the way
we really need to rethink about the way that we think about sexual assault and
that we think about sexual assault and
that we think about sexual assault and sexual abuse in our community but I’d
sexual abuse in our community but I’d
sexual abuse in our community but I’d like to give you some good news which is
like to give you some good news which is
like to give you some good news which is that between 1992 and 2010 child
that between 1992 and 2010 child
that between 1992 and 2010 child physical abuse seems to have gone down
physical abuse seems to have gone down
physical abuse seems to have gone down 56 percent and child sexual abuse went
56 percent and child sexual abuse went
56 percent and child sexual abuse went down 62 percent so there is hope that
down 62 percent so there is hope that
down 62 percent so there is hope that change can happen I’d like you to
change can happen I’d like you to
change can happen I’d like you to consider the offender’s themselves
consider the offender’s themselves
consider the offender’s themselves because if 90% of people who are who
because if 90% of people who are who
because if 90% of people who are who have sexually abused a child were known
have sexually abused a child were known
have sexually abused a child were known to the child and 75 percent of all women
to the child and 75 percent of all women
to the child and 75 percent of all women who were raped know they’re rapists it
who were raped know they’re rapists it
who were raped know they’re rapists it means that the the idea that we have
means that the the idea that we have
means that the the idea that we have that it’s the creepy drooling guy in the
that it’s the creepy drooling guy in the
that it’s the creepy drooling guy in the bushes is not most the most accurate
bushes is not most the most accurate
bushes is not most the most accurate idea there are very few generalizations
idea there are very few generalizations
idea there are very few generalizations that we can make about sex offenders but
that we can make about sex offenders but
that we can make about sex offenders but the only one that I can make with any
the only one that I can make with any
the only one that I can make with any degree of certainty is they’re
degree of certainty is they’re
degree of certainty is they’re overwhelmingly male we actually have
overwhelmingly male we actually have
overwhelmingly male we actually have very little information about female sex
very little information about female sex
very little information about female sex offenders because they are so rare and
offenders because they are so rare and
offenders because they are so rare and beyond that
beyond that
beyond that it’s any demographic it doesn’t matter
it’s any demographic it doesn’t matter
it’s any demographic it doesn’t matter what race you are doesn’t matter age you
what race you are doesn’t matter age you
what race you are doesn’t matter age you are doesn’t matter your income doesn’t
are doesn’t matter your income doesn’t
are doesn’t matter your income doesn’t matter your education I have worked with
matter your education I have worked with
matter your education I have worked with people with developmental disabilities
people with developmental disabilities
people with developmental disabilities I’ve worked with people with who are
I’ve worked with people with who are
I’ve worked with people with who are hourly day laborers I have worked with
hourly day laborers I have worked with
hourly day laborers I have worked with people with graduate degrees I’ve worked
people with graduate degrees I’ve worked
people with graduate degrees I’ve worked with people or senior military officers
with people or senior military officers
with people or senior military officers there really isn’t a set pattern so
there really isn’t a set pattern so
there really isn’t a set pattern so again the concepts we have about how
again the concepts we have about how
again the concepts we have about how sexual abuse is happening are in our
sexual abuse is happening are in our
sexual abuse is happening are in our community are not largely accurate when
community are not largely accurate when
community are not largely accurate when I think about the biggest surprise that
I think about the biggest surprise that
I think about the biggest surprise that I have had in learn and doing this work
I have had in learn and doing this work
I have had in learn and doing this work it’s this many sex offenders can change
it’s this many sex offenders can change
it’s this many sex offenders can change that was not at all what I was expecting
that was not at all what I was expecting
that was not at all what I was expecting and if you ask me what keeps me doing
and if you ask me what keeps me doing
and if you ask me what keeps me doing this work that’s it right there
this work that’s it right there
this work that’s it right there in the state of Washington there are
in the state of Washington there are
in the state of Washington there are typically three paths that I see people
typically three paths that I see people
typically three paths that I see people go down the first one is the wake-up
go down the first one is the wake-up
go down the first one is the wake-up call and these are the people who have
call and these are the people who have
call and these are the people who have known for some time that there is
known for some time that there is
known for some time that there is something wrong with their lives but
something wrong with their lives but
something wrong with their lives but they haven’t really known quite what and
they haven’t really known quite what and
they haven’t really known quite what and then suddenly their involvement with the
then suddenly their involvement with the
then suddenly their involvement with the criminal justice system makes them
criminal justice system makes them
criminal justice system makes them realize they’re now in the worst case
realize they’re now in the worst case
realize they’re now in the worst case scenario and they need to change and
scenario and they need to change and
scenario and they need to change and they tend to be pretty responsive to
they tend to be pretty responsive to
they tend to be pretty responsive to treatment because they realize that they
treatment because they realize that they
treatment because they realize that they want their life to go in a different
want their life to go in a different
want their life to go in a different direction and I’ve been very happy to
direction and I’ve been very happy to
direction and I’ve been very happy to see a number of people completely turn
see a number of people completely turn
see a number of people completely turn their lives around
their lives around
their lives around the second group that tends to happen or
the second group that tends to happen or
the second group that tends to happen or the people that minimize their offenses
the people that minimize their offenses
the people that minimize their offenses and these are the ones who come into
and these are the ones who come into
and these are the ones who come into treatment and they know they don’t
treatment and they know they don’t
treatment and they know they don’t belong there and they know they didn’t
belong there and they know they didn’t
belong there and they know they didn’t really have anything to do with their
really have anything to do with their
really have anything to do with their offense and they’re just not engaging
offense and they’re just not engaging
offense and they’re just not engaging and this is where we as a society are
and this is where we as a society are
and this is where we as a society are doing something to which I am profoundly
doing something to which I am profoundly
doing something to which I am profoundly glad to the State of Washington’s
glad to the State of Washington’s
glad to the State of Washington’s legislature which is that in the state
legislature which is that in the state
legislature which is that in the state of Washington we are not a three-strike
of Washington we are not a three-strike
of Washington we are not a three-strike state we are a two-strike state if you
state we are a two-strike state if you
state we are a two-strike state if you commit a second felony sex offense in
commit a second felony sex offense in
commit a second felony sex offense in the state of Washington you will be
the state of Washington you will be
the state of Washington you will be incarcerated for the rest of your life
incarcerated for the rest of your life
incarcerated for the rest of your life without possibility of release that’s
without possibility of release that’s
without possibility of release that’s how seriously we take sex offenses in
how seriously we take sex offenses in
how seriously we take sex offenses in the state of law
the state of law
the state of law there is no other category of crimes
there is no other category of crimes
there is no other category of crimes where that is the case so when I have
where that is the case so when I have
where that is the case so when I have somebody in the second group come to
somebody in the second group come to
somebody in the second group come to therapy and after four to six weeks they
therapy and after four to six weeks they
therapy and after four to six weeks they still haven’t engaged and they’re
still haven’t engaged and they’re
still haven’t engaged and they’re rolling it on their eyes at some point I
rolling it on their eyes at some point I
rolling it on their eyes at some point I may need to say something like look you
may need to say something like look you
may need to say something like look you don’t have to listen to me if you don’t
don’t have to listen to me if you don’t
don’t have to listen to me if you don’t want to but what I can tell you is that
want to but what I can tell you is that
want to but what I can tell you is that I can help can help you from not
I can help can help you from not
I can help can help you from not reoffending and if you didn’t like
reoffending and if you didn’t like
reoffending and if you didn’t like prison the first time you’re going to
prison the first time you’re going to
prison the first time you’re going to like it a whole lot less the second time
like it a whole lot less the second time
like it a whole lot less the second time because you are not getting out and it’s
because you are not getting out and it’s
because you are not getting out and it’s amazing how quickly that will engage
amazing how quickly that will engage
amazing how quickly that will engage somebody in treatment
somebody in treatment
somebody in treatment so these this group will not typically
so these this group will not typically
so these this group will not typically respond nearly as well as the first
respond nearly as well as the first
respond nearly as well as the first group but they still do make some
group but they still do make some
group but they still do make some changes the third group is in many ways
changes the third group is in many ways
changes the third group is in many ways the most controversial because there’s
the most controversial because there’s
the most controversial because there’s the questions of victims rights and
the questions of victims rights and
the questions of victims rights and there’s the question of civil rights and
there’s the question of civil rights and
there’s the question of civil rights and in Washington state victims rights went
in Washington state victims rights went
in Washington state victims rights went out so there’s a process that happens
out so there’s a process that happens
out so there’s a process that happens when we have someone who’s committed a
when we have someone who’s committed a
when we have someone who’s committed a particularly heinous sex crime when they
particularly heinous sex crime when they
particularly heinous sex crime when they have gotten to the end of their prison
have gotten to the end of their prison
have gotten to the end of their prison sentence they will undergo a very
sentence they will undergo a very
sentence they will undergo a very thorough psychological evaluation and it
thorough psychological evaluation and it
thorough psychological evaluation and it reads something called a risk assessment
reads something called a risk assessment
reads something called a risk assessment we have actuarial tables where we can
we have actuarial tables where we can
we have actuarial tables where we can estimate somebody’s probability of
estimate somebody’s probability of
estimate somebody’s probability of reoffending and so we can determine
reoffending and so we can determine
reoffending and so we can determine somebody’s risk and if we think somebody
somebody’s risk and if we think somebody
somebody’s risk and if we think somebody is too high of a risk to be returned to
is too high of a risk to be returned to
is too high of a risk to be returned to the community we will do something
the community we will do something
the community we will do something called civil commitment and this means
called civil commitment and this means
called civil commitment and this means that they are going to be sent to a
that they are going to be sent to a
that they are going to be sent to a special treatment center for an
special treatment center for an
special treatment center for an indefinite amount of time until their
indefinite amount of time until their
indefinite amount of time until their psyche and go through intensive
psyche and go through intensive
psyche and go through intensive treatment until it is believed that they
treatment until it is believed that they
treatment until it is believed that they can be safely returned to the community
can be safely returned to the community
can be safely returned to the community this process can last for decades and
this process can last for decades and
this process can last for decades and there is no specific end date for when
there is no specific end date for when
there is no specific end date for when this happens this means that we are
this happens this means that we are
this happens this means that we are willing to commit somebody without their
willing to commit somebody without their
willing to commit somebody without their having necessarily committed a crime
having necessarily committed a crime
having necessarily committed a crime it means that we turn into the thought
it means that we turn into the thought
it means that we turn into the thought police like in the movie Minority Report
this is McNeil Island which may look
this is McNeil Island which may look like a lovely vacation spot on this
like a lovely vacation spot on this
like a lovely vacation spot on this picture but this is where the special
picture but this is where the special
picture but this is where the special couldn’t centre is it’s the Washington
couldn’t centre is it’s the Washington
couldn’t centre is it’s the Washington State equivalent of Alcatraz so where we
State equivalent of Alcatraz so where we
State equivalent of Alcatraz so where we send the worst of the worst so these
send the worst of the worst so these
send the worst of the worst so these buildings are all surrounded by fences
buildings are all surrounded by fences
buildings are all surrounded by fences that are capped with double razors of
that are capped with double razors of
that are capped with double razors of layers of razor wire there’s really only
layers of razor wire there’s really only
layers of razor wire there’s really only two ways to get off of McNeil Island the
two ways to get off of McNeil Island the
two ways to get off of McNeil Island the first way is that you would realize what
first way is that you would realize what
first way is that you would realize what you’re missing and you decide that
you’re missing and you decide that
you’re missing and you decide that you’re going to make the changes that
you’re going to make the changes that
you’re going to make the changes that you need in your life and you undergo
you need in your life and you undergo
you need in your life and you undergo intensive treatment for years you’re
intensive treatment for years you’re
intensive treatment for years you’re then given psychological evaluations and
then given psychological evaluations and
then given psychological evaluations and when it looks like you finally have
when it looks like you finally have
when it looks like you finally have changed enough to be able to rejoin
changed enough to be able to rejoin
changed enough to be able to rejoin society you’re then put through a
society you’re then put through a
society you’re then put through a transition process and you are returned
transition process and you are returned
transition process and you are returned the second thing that could happen is
the second thing that could happen is
the second thing that could happen is that you decide that you don’t want to
that you decide that you don’t want to
that you decide that you don’t want to change or that you can’t change and you
change or that you can’t change and you
change or that you can’t change and you decide not to engage in treatment and
decide not to engage in treatment and
decide not to engage in treatment and you end up remaining alone you leave
you end up remaining alone you leave
you end up remaining alone you leave McNeil Island in a body bag if you want
McNeil Island in a body bag if you want
McNeil Island in a body bag if you want to find out where sex offenders are
to find out where sex offenders are
to find out where sex offenders are located you can look them up in the
located you can look them up in the
located you can look them up in the online national sex offender database
online national sex offender database
online national sex offender database you’ll find them by name you will find
you’ll find them by name you will find
you’ll find them by name you will find them by location and you will find the
them by location and you will find the
them by location and you will find the fence that they have been convicted of
fence that they have been convicted of
fence that they have been convicted of you will be able to find out the worst
you will be able to find out the worst
you will be able to find out the worst thing that they have ever done to
thing that they have ever done to
thing that they have ever done to another person but that leads me to a
another person but that leads me to a
another person but that leads me to a big question what if there was an online
big question what if there was an online
big question what if there was an online database where the worst thing any of us
database where the worst thing any of us
database where the worst thing any of us had ever done was listed and anyone
had ever done was listed and anyone
had ever done was listed and anyone could look it up how would you want
could look it up how would you want
could look it up how would you want people to think about an act toward you
people to think about an act toward you
people to think about an act toward you if they knew the worst thing you had
if they knew the worst thing you had
if they knew the worst thing you had ever done how would you think about and
ever done how would you think about and
ever done how would you think about and act toward your friends and loved ones
act toward your friends and loved ones
act toward your friends and loved ones if you knew that about them this
if you knew that about them this
if you knew that about them this difference between how you would want
difference between how you would want
difference between how you would want other people to act and think about you
other people to act and think about you
other people to act and think about you and if they knew the worst thing about
and if they knew the worst thing about
and if they knew the worst thing about you and how you would act and think
you and how you would act and think
you and how you would act and think about a sex offender if you met them
about a sex offender if you met them
about a sex offender if you met them because if you did you would know the
because if you did you would know the
because if you did you would know the worst thing they have ever done is what
worst thing they have ever done is what
worst thing they have ever done is what I think is the compassion differential
I have to work on my compassion
I have to work on my compassion differential every single day or I can’t
differential every single day or I can’t
differential every single day or I can’t do my job and some days it’s worse than
do my job and some days it’s worse than
do my job and some days it’s worse than others and some days that’s easier than
others and some days that’s easier than
others and some days that’s easier than others the people that I think of that
others the people that I think of that
others the people that I think of that are able to engage the best in their
are able to engage the best in their
are able to engage the best in their community are the ones who are
community are the ones who are
community are the ones who are constantly minimizing that compassion
constantly minimizing that compassion
constantly minimizing that compassion differential there’s a way in which I
differential there’s a way in which I
differential there’s a way in which I think we’re actually not that different
think we’re actually not that different
think we’re actually not that different than the men on McNeil Island we can
than the men on McNeil Island we can
than the men on McNeil Island we can decide that we don’t want to fully
decide that we don’t want to fully
decide that we don’t want to fully engage in our community and we’re going
engage in our community and we’re going
engage in our community and we’re going to be arraigned alone and look at the
to be arraigned alone and look at the
to be arraigned alone and look at the worst part of ourselves or we can look
worst part of ourselves or we can look
worst part of ourselves or we can look at the worst part of ourselves and put
at the worst part of ourselves and put
at the worst part of ourselves and put in the difficult work of changing
in the difficult work of changing
in the difficult work of changing ourselves but eventually learn to teach
ourselves but eventually learn to teach
ourselves but eventually learn to teach ourselves the compassion and show it to
ourselves the compassion and show it to
ourselves the compassion and show it to ourselves which we can then share with
ourselves which we can then share with
ourselves which we can then share with other people and fully engage in the
other people and fully engage in the
other people and fully engage in the community thank you for listening
community thank you for listening
community thank you for listening [Applause]
”
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