so I’m going to start by showing you some images of my work and some feedback
some images of my work and some feedback
some images of my work and some feedback I’ve had over the years
I’ve had over the years
I’ve had over the years can you leave out the menstrual blood
can you leave out the menstrual blood
can you leave out the menstrual blood now this is a painting I made called
now this is a painting I made called
now this is a painting I made called matric with prides and as you can see
matric with prides and as you can see
matric with prides and as you can see people are crowded around looking
people are crowded around looking
people are crowded around looking shocked and appalled by the menstrual
shocked and appalled by the menstrual
shocked and appalled by the menstrual blood if there was no menstrual blood
blood if there was no menstrual blood
blood if there was no menstrual blood they’ll just be looking shocked and
they’ll just be looking shocked and
they’ll just be looking shocked and appalled for no reason thanks for the
appalled for no reason thanks for the
appalled for no reason thanks for the feedback mum that’s just unnatural as
feedback mum that’s just unnatural as
feedback mum that’s just unnatural as you can see here they are referring to
you can see here they are referring to
you can see here they are referring to my completely natural armpit hair which
my completely natural armpit hair which
my completely natural armpit hair which took me three months to grow fun fact if
took me three months to grow fun fact if
took me three months to grow fun fact if you think it’s okay to be a Muslim live
you think it’s okay to be a Muslim live
you think it’s okay to be a Muslim live a westernized life and rely on being a
a westernized life and rely on being a
a westernized life and rely on being a good person you are wrong you will burn
good person you are wrong you will burn
good person you are wrong you will burn in hell now this person was referring to
in hell now this person was referring to
in hell now this person was referring to a number of images that I’ve made for
a number of images that I’ve made for
a number of images that I’ve made for example this one which is called white
example this one which is called white
example this one which is called white girl and this one self-portrait with
girl and this one self-portrait with
girl and this one self-portrait with melons I will look for you I will find
melons I will look for you I will find
melons I will look for you I will find you and I will kill you some of the more
you and I will kill you some of the more
you and I will kill you some of the more observant here today may have noticed
observant here today may have noticed
observant here today may have noticed that was actually quite from the film
that was actually quite from the film
that was actually quite from the film taken but I did get similar comments on
taken but I did get similar comments on
taken but I did get similar comments on my work and I will come back to that in
my work and I will come back to that in
my work and I will come back to that in a minute
a minute
a minute so this work didn’t just come out of
so this work didn’t just come out of
so this work didn’t just come out of nowhere it came through from a
nowhere it came through from a
nowhere it came through from a breakthrough moment that I had when I
breakthrough moment that I had when I
breakthrough moment that I had when I was at art school I made a work where I
was at art school I made a work where I
was at art school I made a work where I thought yes this is the kind of artist
thought yes this is the kind of artist
thought yes this is the kind of artist that I want to be so when your article
that I want to be so when your article
that I want to be so when your article you have to do these terrifying crit
you have to do these terrifying crit
you have to do these terrifying crit sessions where as a group you go around
sessions where as a group you go around
sessions where as a group you go around and you show your work and you give
and you show your work and you give
and you show your work and you give feedback in everything to your
feedback in everything to your
feedback in everything to your classmates and on this particular
classmates and on this particular
classmates and on this particular occasion I noticed there was a pattern
occasion I noticed there was a pattern
occasion I noticed there was a pattern emerging I noticed every time the men
emerging I noticed every time the men
emerging I noticed every time the men got up to speak it seemed like we
got up to speak it seemed like we
got up to speak it seemed like we automatically kind of respected them and
automatically kind of respected them and
automatically kind of respected them and we really listened to them and when the
we really listened to them and when the
we really listened to them and when the women got up to speak we were so much
women got up to speak we were so much
women got up to speak we were so much harder on them I said it’s more
harder on them I said it’s more
harder on them I said it’s more dismissive of them and I was complicit
dismissive of them and I was complicit
dismissive of them and I was complicit in that and we were all complicit in
in that and we were all complicit in
in that and we were all complicit in that
that
that and so when I was driving home late I
and so when I was driving home late I
and so when I was driving home late I was thinking about it snow I was
was thinking about it snow I was
was thinking about it snow I was thinking how we kind of had this sort of
thinking how we kind of had this sort of
thinking how we kind of had this sort of unconscious positive bias towards the
unconscious positive bias towards the
unconscious positive bias towards the men and it was the first time in my life
men and it was the first time in my life
men and it was the first time in my life I really realized that I might be held
I really realized that I might be held
I really realized that I might be held back because of my gender and it wasn’t
back because of my gender and it wasn’t
back because of my gender and it wasn’t that I was a feminist I didn’t even know
that I was a feminist I didn’t even know
that I was a feminist I didn’t even know what feminism was it was just a feeling
what feminism was it was just a feeling
what feminism was it was just a feeling that I had that something wasn’t quite
that I had that something wasn’t quite
that I had that something wasn’t quite right so I was driving home was getting
right so I was driving home was getting
right so I was driving home was getting really annoyed and thinking oh I wish I
really annoyed and thinking oh I wish I
really annoyed and thinking oh I wish I was a man if I was a man people would
was a man if I was a man people would
was a man if I was a man people would take the things I have to say so much
take the things I have to say so much
take the things I have to say so much more seriously and then this work kind
more seriously and then this work kind
more seriously and then this work kind of came into my head it says I wish I
of came into my head it says I wish I
of came into my head it says I wish I had a penis
had a penis
had a penis because then I’d you then steal
because then I’d you then steal
because then I’d you then steal your job and this highly amused me so
your job and this highly amused me so
your job and this highly amused me so the next crit session that we had I
the next crit session that we had I
the next crit session that we had I plucked up the courage to show my tutor
plucked up the courage to show my tutor
plucked up the courage to show my tutor in class makes this image up until this
in class makes this image up until this
in class makes this image up until this point I had literally just been doing
point I had literally just been doing
point I had literally just been doing pictures of me rain berries so they were
pictures of me rain berries so they were
pictures of me rain berries so they were not expecting this so when I showed them
not expecting this so when I showed them
not expecting this so when I showed them they were like ah you can’t say this you
they were like ah you can’t say this you
they were like ah you can’t say this you can’t talk about this we don’t need
can’t talk about this we don’t need
can’t talk about this we don’t need feminism what do you mean and I realized
feminism what do you mean and I realized
feminism what do you mean and I realized they were talking like this because I
they were talking like this because I
they were talking like this because I attached on something they did not want
attached on something they did not want
attached on something they did not want to think about something they’d happily
to think about something they’d happily
to think about something they’d happily parked in the back of their minds
parked in the back of their minds
parked in the back of their minds I had unwittingly exposed that things
I had unwittingly exposed that things
I had unwittingly exposed that things that was my breakthrough and I thought
that was my breakthrough and I thought
that was my breakthrough and I thought at this point I have to say I’d always
at this point I have to say I’d always
at this point I have to say I’d always felt pretty powerless I had a lot to say
felt pretty powerless I had a lot to say
felt pretty powerless I had a lot to say but a lot of issues but I didn’t know
but a lot of issues but I didn’t know
but a lot of issues but I didn’t know how to express it or how to make sense
how to express it or how to make sense
how to express it or how to make sense of it when I made this work it gave me
of it when I made this work it gave me
of it when I made this work it gave me the power arts gave me a voice and as we
the power arts gave me a voice and as we
the power arts gave me a voice and as we all know there are so many unequal
all know there are so many unequal
all know there are so many unequal things in society and it’s almost like
things in society and it’s almost like
things in society and it’s almost like we’ve kind of gotten used to some of
we’ve kind of gotten used to some of
we’ve kind of gotten used to some of those things and that’s not our fault
those things and that’s not our fault
those things and that’s not our fault and I realized I could use art to call
and I realized I could use art to call
and I realized I could use art to call out those things and maybe I could be
out those things and maybe I could be
out those things and maybe I could be part of a movement to change things I
part of a movement to change things I
part of a movement to change things I could use art to say the unsayable so
could use art to say the unsayable so
could use art to say the unsayable so what happens when you do that this is a
what happens when you do that this is a
what happens when you do that this is a picture that I made in 2008
picture that I made in 2008
picture that I made in 2008 it’s called Haram and I’d like you to
it’s called Haram and I’d like you to
it’s called Haram and I’d like you to raise your hands if you find this image
raise your hands if you find this image
raise your hands if you find this image offensive
okay so I’ll be honest I was unsure
okay so I’ll be honest I was unsure whether to show this image because I
whether to show this image because I
whether to show this image because I know it’s a difficult one and I know
know it’s a difficult one and I know
know it’s a difficult one and I know that if I’ve seen it I think I’ll
that if I’ve seen it I think I’ll
that if I’ve seen it I think I’ll probably be offended by it so let me
probably be offended by it so let me
probably be offended by it so let me tell you a little bit more about this my
tell you a little bit more about this my
tell you a little bit more about this my mother is a Muslim she was born in Kenya
mother is a Muslim she was born in Kenya
mother is a Muslim she was born in Kenya and she married my non-muslim British
and she married my non-muslim British
and she married my non-muslim British father she raised me and my siblings as
father she raised me and my siblings as
father she raised me and my siblings as Muslims any spawn and sent us to a
Muslims any spawn and sent us to a
Muslims any spawn and sent us to a Catholic school so a lot of my work is
Catholic school so a lot of my work is
Catholic school so a lot of my work is about that duality my upbringing and the
about that duality my upbringing and the
about that duality my upbringing and the conflicts of identity amongst young
conflicts of identity amongst young
conflicts of identity amongst young British Muslims for those of you who
British Muslims for those of you who
British Muslims for those of you who don’t know eating pork is prohibited in
don’t know eating pork is prohibited in
don’t know eating pork is prohibited in the Koran and as a result of that for
the Koran and as a result of that for
the Koran and as a result of that for many Muslims pigs are an offensive
many Muslims pigs are an offensive
many Muslims pigs are an offensive things and I would say most Muslims who
things and I would say most Muslims who
things and I would say most Muslims who break the odd rule here and there would
break the odd rule here and there would
break the odd rule here and there would still not break that rule because it’s
still not break that rule because it’s
still not break that rule because it’s such a taboo and for me growing up pigs
such a taboo and for me growing up pigs
such a taboo and for me growing up pigs almost kind of became a symbol of the
almost kind of became a symbol of the
almost kind of became a symbol of the other of someone who was different to me
other of someone who was different to me
other of someone who was different to me but when I got older I realized that
but when I got older I realized that
but when I got older I realized that other is me as I’m a mix of various
other is me as I’m a mix of various
other is me as I’m a mix of various British Muslims living in the Western
British Muslims living in the Western
British Muslims living in the Western world and how does that parallel other
world and how does that parallel other
world and how does that parallel other British Muslims who may be feeling
British Muslims who may be feeling
British Muslims who may be feeling conflicts of identity and on a personal
conflicts of identity and on a personal
conflicts of identity and on a personal level I have to say the work was a
level I have to say the work was a
level I have to say the work was a deeply personal work for me looking at
deeply personal work for me looking at
deeply personal work for me looking at my upbringing and all the things that
my upbringing and all the things that
my upbringing and all the things that I’d experienced and it means a lot to me
I’d experienced and it means a lot to me
I’d experienced and it means a lot to me so it’s quite hard to summarize it in
so it’s quite hard to summarize it in
so it’s quite hard to summarize it in this talk but I will summarize its the
this talk but I will summarize its the
this talk but I will summarize its the idea was to bring these two things
idea was to bring these two things
idea was to bring these two things together to ask the question how can we
together to ask the question how can we
together to ask the question how can we embrace these two cultures so exhibited
embrace these two cultures so exhibited
embrace these two cultures so exhibited this work in 2008 in London during the
this work in 2008 in London during the
this work in 2008 in London during the show I get a phone call with telling me
show I get a phone call with telling me
show I get a phone call with telling me I need to come to the gallery right away
I need to come to the gallery right away
I need to come to the gallery right away because someone had thrown a brick
because someone had thrown a brick
because someone had thrown a brick through the gallery window the press got
through the gallery window the press got
through the gallery window the press got hold of this story and it went crazy the
hold of this story and it went crazy the
hold of this story and it went crazy the reason behind me making it had just
reason behind me making it had just
reason behind me making it had just gotten completely lost and it was all
gotten completely lost and it was all
gotten completely lost and it was all over the news I tried to keep it from my
over the news I tried to keep it from my
over the news I tried to keep it from my friends and family but it just wasn’t
friends and family but it just wasn’t
friends and family but it just wasn’t possible it got more serious when I
possible it got more serious when I
possible it got more serious when I started receiving death threats towards
started receiving death threats towards
started receiving death threats towards me and my family
me and my family
me and my family when the police came one of them said to
when the police came one of them said to
when the police came one of them said to me you knew this would happen
me you knew this would happen
me you knew this would happen you should never have
you should never have
you should never have it now thank you for the feedback
it now thank you for the feedback
it now thank you for the feedback officer greatly appreciated I knew I was
officer greatly appreciated I knew I was
officer greatly appreciated I knew I was doing something provocative but I was
doing something provocative but I was
doing something provocative but I was taking a risk
taking a risk
taking a risk I thought the risk was worth taking to
I thought the risk was worth taking to
I thought the risk was worth taking to say the thing I felt needed to be said
say the thing I felt needed to be said
say the thing I felt needed to be said now disclaimer I am NOT comparing myself
now disclaimer I am NOT comparing myself
now disclaimer I am NOT comparing myself to and he please people but imagine if
to and he please people but imagine if
to and he please people but imagine if he was right imagine if we applied that
he was right imagine if we applied that
he was right imagine if we applied that school of thoughts revolutionaries
school of thoughts revolutionaries
school of thoughts revolutionaries throughout history if they avoided doing
throughout history if they avoided doing
throughout history if they avoided doing something that may offend people what he
something that may offend people what he
something that may offend people what he was saying in fact was be quiet which is
was saying in fact was be quiet which is
was saying in fact was be quiet which is something a lot more serious so I have a
something a lot more serious so I have a
something a lot more serious so I have a confession to make I recently signed a
confession to make I recently signed a
confession to make I recently signed a petition to stop somebody from speaking
petition to stop somebody from speaking
petition to stop somebody from speaking in the UK I think it was like an
in the UK I think it was like an
in the UK I think it was like an anti-feminist speaker or something after
anti-feminist speaker or something after
anti-feminist speaker or something after I signed it I thought what have I done
I signed it I thought what have I done
I signed it I thought what have I done because that completely contradicts
because that completely contradicts
because that completely contradicts everything that I stand for as an artist
everything that I stand for as an artist
everything that I stand for as an artist because even if I disagree with that
because even if I disagree with that
because even if I disagree with that person they have the right to speak this
person they have the right to speak this
person they have the right to speak this is what got me thinking about the
is what got me thinking about the
is what got me thinking about the silencing of artists and activists in my
silencing of artists and activists in my
silencing of artists and activists in my work as we hear now more and more people
work as we hear now more and more people
work as we hear now more and more people on social media for example here are
on social media for example here are
on social media for example here are being trolled consistently online as
being trolled consistently online as
being trolled consistently online as well this is a way to silence their
well this is a way to silence their
well this is a way to silence their voices sorry mmm this is a way to
voices sorry mmm this is a way to
voices sorry mmm this is a way to silence their voices a lot of these
silence their voices a lot of these
silence their voices a lot of these activists actually said that they have
activists actually said that they have
activists actually said that they have stopped their work altogether and they
stopped their work altogether and they
stopped their work altogether and they began to self-censor I can relate to
began to self-censor I can relate to
began to self-censor I can relate to this
this
this I had always maintained that I was
I had always maintained that I was
I had always maintained that I was strong and I would never give in to any
strong and I would never give in to any
strong and I would never give in to any abuse and I would always make
abuse and I would always make
abuse and I would always make controversial work
controversial work
controversial work I made my haram painting in 2008 I
I made my haram painting in 2008 I
I made my haram painting in 2008 I realized I had not touched on Islam
realized I had not touched on Islam
realized I had not touched on Islam again in my work since that I’d always
again in my work since that I’d always
again in my work since that I’d always said I was strong and I would I would
said I was strong and I would I would
said I was strong and I would I would never I would never give in to abuse and
never I would never give in to abuse and
never I would never give in to abuse and that’s I didn’t need to talk about that
that’s I didn’t need to talk about that
that’s I didn’t need to talk about that subject anymore but how could I not need
subject anymore but how could I not need
subject anymore but how could I not need to talk about that anymore Islam is at
to talk about that anymore Islam is at
to talk about that anymore Islam is at the very core of my identity it’s
the very core of my identity it’s
the very core of my identity it’s incredulous when I think that I didn’t
incredulous when I think that I didn’t
incredulous when I think that I didn’t need to discuss that any
need to discuss that any
need to discuss that any the truth was they had one I’ve been
the truth was they had one I’ve been
the truth was they had one I’ve been self-censoring
self-censoring
self-censoring and I just hadn’t realized it but don’t
and I just hadn’t realized it but don’t
and I just hadn’t realized it but don’t food to story of me because I was still
food to story of me because I was still
food to story of me because I was still annoying people work just about
annoying people work just about
annoying people work just about something else and I have to say this is
something else and I have to say this is
something else and I have to say this is the piece that annoys people the most
the piece that annoys people the most
the piece that annoys people the most and I’m not sorry about that one bit
and I’m not sorry about that one bit
and I’m not sorry about that one bit people always say to me I know you don’t
people always say to me I know you don’t
people always say to me I know you don’t mean to offend and you want to provoke
mean to offend and you want to provoke
mean to offend and you want to provoke anyone but the thing is I do I don’t
anyone but the thing is I do I don’t
anyone but the thing is I do I don’t think you should provoke anyone just for
think you should provoke anyone just for
think you should provoke anyone just for the sake of it there’s no point in that
the sake of it there’s no point in that
the sake of it there’s no point in that but I think provocation can be used in a
but I think provocation can be used in a
but I think provocation can be used in a clever way and it can be used to make us
clever way and it can be used to make us
clever way and it can be used to make us think and that is the point of arts that
think and that is the point of arts that
think and that is the point of arts that is why I do what I do I recently saw a
is why I do what I do I recently saw a
is why I do what I do I recently saw a discussion where someone said you can
discussion where someone said you can
discussion where someone said you can have freedom of speech but there are
have freedom of speech but there are
have freedom of speech but there are limits but I think that conversation is
limits but I think that conversation is
limits but I think that conversation is a complete non-starter because an order
a complete non-starter because an order
a complete non-starter because an order of freedom of speech to be a thing there
of freedom of speech to be a thing there
of freedom of speech to be a thing there can be no limits if there are limits
can be no limits if there are limits
can be no limits if there are limits there isn’t it freedom of speech or with
there isn’t it freedom of speech or with
there isn’t it freedom of speech or with no freedom of speech we cannot progress
no freedom of speech we cannot progress
no freedom of speech we cannot progress as a society I always think we’re so
as a society I always think we’re so
as a society I always think we’re so lucky in this country we technically we
lucky in this country we technically we
lucky in this country we technically we can say what we wants and and we can be
can say what we wants and and we can be
can say what we wants and and we can be who we want to be but that’s certainly
who we want to be but that’s certainly
who we want to be but that’s certainly not the way it is all over the world we
not the way it is all over the world we
not the way it is all over the world we have a great gift and we need to use it
have a great gift and we need to use it
have a great gift and we need to use it I don’t have the answers I’m afraid I
I don’t have the answers I’m afraid I
I don’t have the answers I’m afraid I simply make the work and leave it up
simply make the work and leave it up
simply make the work and leave it up there for you to discuss I think we need
there for you to discuss I think we need
there for you to discuss I think we need to be challenged we need to hear
to be challenged we need to hear
to be challenged we need to hear challenging radical provocative things
challenging radical provocative things
challenging radical provocative things even if we don’t agree with them because
even if we don’t agree with them because
even if we don’t agree with them because it’s those things that make us react and
it’s those things that make us react and
it’s those things that make us react and make us want to bring about change we
make us want to bring about change we
make us want to bring about change we have the freedom to express ourselves
have the freedom to express ourselves
have the freedom to express ourselves but also to hear the thing we don’t want
but also to hear the thing we don’t want
but also to hear the thing we don’t want to hear and that is equally important
to hear and that is equally important
to hear and that is equally important the freedom to be challenged let’s
the freedom to be challenged let’s
the freedom to be challenged let’s embrace that let’s not squander our
embrace that let’s not squander our
embrace that let’s not squander our freedom thank you
freedom thank you
freedom thank you [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
”
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