I am sometimes being described as being quietly confident I often get described
quietly confident I often get described
quietly confident I often get described as being determined my family will tell
as being determined my family will tell
as being determined my family will tell you that I’m stubborn my good friends
you that I’m stubborn my good friends
you that I’m stubborn my good friends sighs barks often tells me that I am a
sighs barks often tells me that I am a
sighs barks often tells me that I am a stunning little another good friend full
stunning little another good friend full
stunning little another good friend full range short once told me that the only
range short once told me that the only
range short once told me that the only reason I’m here today is because I am
reason I’m here today is because I am
reason I’m here today is because I am the most belligerent he knows so this is
the most belligerent he knows so this is
the most belligerent he knows so this is how my good friends and family think of
how my good friends and family think of
how my good friends and family think of me thanks I guess but I’ll be honest I
me thanks I guess but I’ll be honest I
me thanks I guess but I’ll be honest I feel slightly misunderstood and I was
feel slightly misunderstood and I was
feel slightly misunderstood and I was chatting to another friend about this
chatting to another friend about this
chatting to another friend about this just the other week and he said John how
just the other week and he said John how
just the other week and he said John how can anyone misunderstand someone that is
can anyone misunderstand someone that is
can anyone misunderstand someone that is blunt with you but they do the current
blunt with you but they do the current
blunt with you but they do the current recruiting slogan for the Wolverines is
recruiting slogan for the Wolverines is
recruiting slogan for the Wolverines is it’s a state of mind but 15 years ago
it’s a state of mind but 15 years ago
it’s a state of mind but 15 years ago when I joined it was 99.9% need not
when I joined it was 99.9% need not
when I joined it was 99.9% need not apply and people regularly used to tell
apply and people regularly used to tell
apply and people regularly used to tell me why I need not apply but I stand here
me why I need not apply but I stand here
me why I need not apply but I stand here today having successfully completed rule
today having successfully completed rule
today having successfully completed rule Marines commando young officer training
Marines commando young officer training
Marines commando young officer training when I was 19 having passed the rule
when I was 19 having passed the rule
when I was 19 having passed the rule Marines Mountain leader course which
Marines Mountain leader course which
Marines Mountain leader course which Stephen tougher than commando training
Stephen tougher than commando training
Stephen tougher than commando training when I was 23 having survived Stanley on
when I was 23 having survived Stanley on
when I was 23 having survived Stanley on bomb and losing three limbs having built
bomb and losing three limbs having built
bomb and losing three limbs having built my own house having completed the
my own house having completed the
my own house having completed the advisors Westminster cadres with only
advisors Westminster cadres with only
advisors Westminster cadres with only one arm having kept myself successfully
one arm having kept myself successfully
one arm having kept myself successfully self-employed for the last four years
self-employed for the last four years
self-employed for the last four years having got through 17 surgeries in the
having got through 17 surgeries in the
having got through 17 surgeries in the past three years and over the past five
past three years and over the past five
past three years and over the past five years having twice being instrument
years having twice being instrument
years having twice being instrument in changing government policy so what’s
in changing government policy so what’s
in changing government policy so what’s the secret how do you force your heart
the secret how do you force your heart
the secret how do you force your heart and nerve and sinew to do that turn them
and nerve and sinew to do that turn them
and nerve and sinew to do that turn them after you’ve gone and so hold on when
after you’ve gone and so hold on when
after you’ve gone and so hold on when there was nothing that in you except the
there was nothing that in you except the
there was nothing that in you except the will which says to them hold on that’s
will which says to them hold on that’s
will which says to them hold on that’s something we’re going to explore now
something we’re going to explore now
something we’re going to explore now because you’re probably all sitting
because you’re probably all sitting
because you’re probably all sitting there thinking wow this guy is pretty
there thinking wow this guy is pretty
there thinking wow this guy is pretty arrogant giving that list but actually
arrogant giving that list but actually
arrogant giving that list but actually the reality is I’m not I suffer a lot
the reality is I’m not I suffer a lot
the reality is I’m not I suffer a lot from that lack of self-confidence the
from that lack of self-confidence the
from that lack of self-confidence the reason I tell you all of those things
reason I tell you all of those things
reason I tell you all of those things actually to make you realize what is
actually to make you realize what is
actually to make you realize what is possible you see I have very little in
possible you see I have very little in
possible you see I have very little in the way of a natural talent and that’s
the way of a natural talent and that’s
the way of a natural talent and that’s why for all of that list and this one
why for all of that list and this one
why for all of that list and this one person and in most cases many people
person and in most cases many people
person and in most cases many people would tell me that it wouldn’t be able
would tell me that it wouldn’t be able
would tell me that it wouldn’t be able to achieve it you know did I did have
to achieve it you know did I did have
to achieve it you know did I did have one Talent and that’s a talent they all
one Talent and that’s a talent they all
one Talent and that’s a talent they all knew about but they don’t massively
knew about but they don’t massively
knew about but they don’t massively misunderstood as anyone in the room got
misunderstood as anyone in the room got
misunderstood as anyone in the room got any clue what that might be it was being
any clue what that might be it was being
any clue what that might be it was being stubborn so what is being stubborn the
stubborn so what is being stubborn the
stubborn so what is being stubborn the Oxford Dictionary tells us that it’s
Oxford Dictionary tells us that it’s
Oxford Dictionary tells us that it’s having or showing don’t get
having or showing don’t get
having or showing don’t get determination not to change one’s
determination not to change one’s
determination not to change one’s attitude or position on something
attitude or position on something
attitude or position on something especially in spite of good reasons to
especially in spite of good reasons to
especially in spite of good reasons to do so now for me that position is my
do so now for me that position is my
do so now for me that position is my ability to achieve whatever it is and
ability to achieve whatever it is and
ability to achieve whatever it is and I’ve set my mind to but the most
I’ve set my mind to but the most
I’ve set my mind to but the most important part I think about that
important part I think about that
important part I think about that definition is the in spite of good
definition is the in spite of good
definition is the in spite of good reasons to do so there will always be
reasons to do so there will always be
reasons to do so there will always be people who give you good reasons to
people who give you good reasons to
people who give you good reasons to change your position or in other words
change your position or in other words
change your position or in other words give up
so I’ll ask what’s the secret for me I
so I’ll ask what’s the secret for me I compose that that secret is belief
compose that that secret is belief
compose that that secret is belief running stop for minute miles it’s now
running stop for minute miles it’s now
running stop for minute miles it’s now standard in international middle
standard in international middle
standard in international middle distance running
distance running
distance running but 64 years ago for most people it was
but 64 years ago for most people it was
but 64 years ago for most people it was seen as an upgrade or barrier and it’s
seen as an upgrade or barrier and it’s
seen as an upgrade or barrier and it’s the same in
the same in
the same in athletic record for human achievements
athletic record for human achievements
athletic record for human achievements once people know that something is
once people know that something is
once people know that something is possible and it was simply able to go
possible and it was simply able to go
possible and it was simply able to go and do it but what is it that sets the
and do it but what is it that sets the
and do it but what is it that sets the Trailblazers and record breakers apart
Trailblazers and record breakers apart
Trailblazers and record breakers apart when did they get there for me from I
when did they get there for me from I
when did they get there for me from I wonder if it’s down to meticulous
wonder if it’s down to meticulous
wonder if it’s down to meticulous planning
planning
planning I wonder if Sir David Bradford’s remarks
I wonder if Sir David Bradford’s remarks
I wonder if Sir David Bradford’s remarks about the British Cycling team success
about the British Cycling team success
about the British Cycling team success where he said that it was due to
where he said that it was due to
where he said that it was due to specially round wheels on their bikes
specially round wheels on their bikes
specially round wheels on their bikes was actually less of a joke and more of
was actually less of a joke and more of
was actually less of a joke and more of a reference to the level of detail in
a reference to the level of detail in
a reference to the level of detail in perfection he was willing to go to in
perfection he was willing to go to in
perfection he was willing to go to in every aspect of his team’s performance
every aspect of his team’s performance
every aspect of his team’s performance you see I think what turn breaker speed
you see I think what turn breaker speed
you see I think what turn breaker speed is a see their targets and they break
is a see their targets and they break
is a see their targets and they break them down into small achievable steps
them down into small achievable steps
them down into small achievable steps and then once they’ve seen those steps
and then once they’ve seen those steps
and then once they’ve seen those steps laid out in front of them it simply
laid out in front of them it simply
laid out in front of them it simply doesn’t make sense for them to give up
this is something that I’ve always done
this is something that I’ve always done but on that way there’s always going to
but on that way there’s always going to
but on that way there’s always going to be some pain and discomfort I’m sure
be some pain and discomfort I’m sure
be some pain and discomfort I’m sure you’ve all had endeavors like this in
you’ve all had endeavors like this in
you’ve all had endeavors like this in the past where you’re testing yourself
the past where you’re testing yourself
the past where you’re testing yourself and the way that I’ve always dealt with
and the way that I’ve always dealt with
and the way that I’ve always dealt with that pain and discomfort is actually to
that pain and discomfort is actually to
that pain and discomfort is actually to plan for it I plan for it and then I
plan for it I plan for it and then I
plan for it I plan for it and then I embrace it because I know that when I
embrace it because I know that when I
embrace it because I know that when I feel that pain it’s given me confidence
feel that pain it’s given me confidence
feel that pain it’s given me confidence that I am actually on track so what am I
that I am actually on track so what am I
that I am actually on track so what am I saying I’m saying don’t just be stubborn
saying I’m saying don’t just be stubborn
saying I’m saying don’t just be stubborn like a mule
like a mule
like a mule be smart like a human set yourself
be smart like a human set yourself
be smart like a human set yourself targets break them down into achievable
targets break them down into achievable
targets break them down into achievable steps plan for where the pain and
steps plan for where the pain and
steps plan for where the pain and discomfort will be and go for it in full
discomfort will be and go for it in full
discomfort will be and go for it in full confidence this is what I’ve always done
confidence this is what I’ve always done
confidence this is what I’ve always done and it’s what I love having other people
and it’s what I love having other people
and it’s what I love having other people achieve now so I’ve talked about how I
achieve now so I’ve talked about how I
achieve now so I’ve talked about how I go about being stubborn
go about being stubborn
go about being stubborn it’s very methodical process there but
it’s very methodical process there but
it’s very methodical process there but actually what I want to do now is
actually what I want to do now is
actually what I want to do now is how that stubbornness has helped me over
how that stubbornness has helped me over
how that stubbornness has helped me over the years you see how young I meet
the years you see how young I meet
the years you see how young I meet people all the time and I tell them what
people all the time and I tell them what
people all the time and I tell them what I’ve been through
I’ve been through
I’ve been through and they always ask you know how do you
and they always ask you know how do you
and they always ask you know how do you cope with post-traumatic stress disorder
cope with post-traumatic stress disorder
cope with post-traumatic stress disorder and when I say to them well actually
and when I say to them well actually
and when I say to them well actually I’ve never suffered with PTSD they
I’ve never suffered with PTSD they
I’ve never suffered with PTSD they always looked at me in disbelief and
always looked at me in disbelief and
always looked at me in disbelief and just say oh I can’t believe that it
just say oh I can’t believe that it
just say oh I can’t believe that it can’t be possible now I can’t say with
can’t be possible now I can’t say with
can’t be possible now I can’t say with any certainty what it is that has
any certainty what it is that has
any certainty what it is that has protected me from PTSD but I do have a
protected me from PTSD but I do have a
protected me from PTSD but I do have a couple of theories the first is to do
couple of theories the first is to do
couple of theories the first is to do with my memory I’ve I’ve recreated the
with my memory I’ve I’ve recreated the
with my memory I’ve I’ve recreated the memory of those events into something
memory of those events into something
memory of those events into something that I’m comfortable with and the memory
that I’m comfortable with and the memory
that I’m comfortable with and the memory I use of being blown up and the
I use of being blown up and the
I use of being blown up and the subsequent 40 minutes of consciousness I
subsequent 40 minutes of consciousness I
subsequent 40 minutes of consciousness I have no idea whether it’s accurate or
have no idea whether it’s accurate or
have no idea whether it’s accurate or not what I’ve done is I’ve taken some
not what I’ve done is I’ve taken some
not what I’ve done is I’ve taken some images in my head and I’ve mixed them
images in my head and I’ve mixed them
images in my head and I’ve mixed them with the stories that the men on the
with the stories that the men on the
with the stories that the men on the ground with me have told me and I’ve
ground with me have told me and I’ve
ground with me have told me and I’ve created what I described as a kind of
created what I described as a kind of
created what I described as a kind of storyboard
storyboard
storyboard this mixture of images and silent movies
this mixture of images and silent movies
this mixture of images and silent movies and then next to that I have my voice as
and then next to that I have my voice as
and then next to that I have my voice as a narrative explaining what’s going
a narrative explaining what’s going
a narrative explaining what’s going what’s going on and ivory told this
what’s going on and ivory told this
what’s going on and ivory told this story this this memory over and over
story this this memory over and over
story this this memory over and over again in many talks and so what’s
again in many talks and so what’s
again in many talks and so what’s happened now is that is absolutely well
happened now is that is absolutely well
happened now is that is absolutely well entrenched into my mind and that’s what
entrenched into my mind and that’s what
entrenched into my mind and that’s what I feel comfortable with secondly my
I feel comfortable with secondly my
I feel comfortable with secondly my determination to prove to other people
determination to prove to other people
determination to prove to other people and myself that I was able to physically
and myself that I was able to physically
and myself that I was able to physically cope with these injuries meant that what
cope with these injuries meant that what
cope with these injuries meant that what I needed to do was plan my own recovery
I needed to do was plan my own recovery
I needed to do was plan my own recovery meticulously
meticulously
meticulously and after as I set myself ever more
and after as I set myself ever more
and after as I set myself ever more challenging targets and then applied
challenging targets and then applied
challenging targets and then applied myself to achieving them what I found is
myself to achieving them what I found is
myself to achieving them what I found is all too busy to actually sit back and
all too busy to actually sit back and
all too busy to actually sit back and dwell on what would have been at the
dwell on what would have been at the
dwell on what would have been at the time probably more accurate
time probably more accurate
time probably more accurate and possibly far more horrific memories
and possibly far more horrific memories
and possibly far more horrific memories and then eventually those memories were
and then eventually those memories were
and then eventually those memories were just forgotten and also what happened
just forgotten and also what happened
just forgotten and also what happened was in having all those small
was in having all those small
was in having all those small achievements I’ve got to the stage where
achievements I’ve got to the stage where
achievements I’ve got to the stage where all over southern pine my life was back
all over southern pine my life was back
all over southern pine my life was back to normal again and in fact it wasn’t
to normal again and in fact it wasn’t
to normal again and in fact it wasn’t just back to normal my life was great
just back to normal my life was great
just back to normal my life was great and I still really clearly remember the
and I still really clearly remember the
and I still really clearly remember the moment in 2012 two years after the
moment in 2012 two years after the
moment in 2012 two years after the explosion I was sitting by a turquoise
explosion I was sitting by a turquoise
explosion I was sitting by a turquoise River in the mountains of Montenegro do
River in the mountains of Montenegro do
River in the mountains of Montenegro do some anchoring work and I was asked the
some anchoring work and I was asked the
some anchoring work and I was asked the question you remember a time when you
question you remember a time when you
question you remember a time when you felt really powerful and I don’t work
felt really powerful and I don’t work
felt really powerful and I don’t work like this before
like this before
like this before but in this moment it was the first time
but in this moment it was the first time
but in this moment it was the first time I ever thought of myself
I ever thought of myself
I ever thought of myself post-injury and that was the moment
post-injury and that was the moment
post-injury and that was the moment where I realized that I no longer needed
where I realized that I no longer needed
where I realized that I no longer needed to regret my past and because I didn’t
to regret my past and because I didn’t
to regret my past and because I didn’t need to regret it I no longer needed to
need to regret it I no longer needed to
need to regret it I no longer needed to dwell on it too so again it just helped
dwell on it too so again it just helped
dwell on it too so again it just helped me forget those worst memories here’s
me forget those worst memories here’s
me forget those worst memories here’s one warning about all of this though we
one warning about all of this though we
one warning about all of this though we need to find empathy for those around us
need to find empathy for those around us
need to find empathy for those around us because what everyone will understand
because what everyone will understand
because what everyone will understand what it is you’re doing they won’t
what it is you’re doing they won’t
what it is you’re doing they won’t understand your plan and this is
understand your plan and this is
understand your plan and this is something I’ve learned from personal
something I’ve learned from personal
something I’ve learned from personal experience you see I didn’t think that
experience you see I didn’t think that
experience you see I didn’t think that anyone else was allowed to be affected
anyone else was allowed to be affected
anyone else was allowed to be affected by my injuries they were mines work and
by my injuries they were mines work and
by my injuries they were mines work and so when my family when friends my wife
so when my family when friends my wife
so when my family when friends my wife were struggling to deal with my injuries
were struggling to deal with my injuries
were struggling to deal with my injuries or than I was I couldn’t understand this
or than I was I couldn’t understand this
or than I was I couldn’t understand this and it made me really angry not
and it made me really angry not
and it made me really angry not explosively angry that’s not really in
explosively angry that’s not really in
explosively angry that’s not really in my nature but what I did is I tended to
my nature but what I did is I tended to
my nature but what I did is I tended to shut down some of those relationships a
shut down some of those relationships a
shut down some of those relationships a bit and ended up doing quite a lot of
bit and ended up doing quite a lot of
bit and ended up doing quite a lot of damage to them and that’s something that
damage to them and that’s something that
damage to them and that’s something that I’m really trying to repair now so I’m
I’m really trying to repair now so I’m
I’m really trying to repair now so I’m deeply sorry about so you’re probably
deeply sorry about so you’re probably
deeply sorry about so you’re probably sitting there thinking well that’s all
sitting there thinking well that’s all
sitting there thinking well that’s all grateful but it’s easier said than done
grateful but it’s easier said than done
grateful but it’s easier said than done and you’re right it’s not easy and it’s
and you’re right it’s not easy and it’s
and you’re right it’s not easy and it’s not for everyone not everyone can just
not for everyone not everyone can just
not for everyone not everyone can just be stubborn and determined in the way
be stubborn and determined in the way
be stubborn and determined in the way they go about dealing with mental health
they go about dealing with mental health
they go about dealing with mental health issues there’s lots of other options out
issues there’s lots of other options out
issues there’s lots of other options out there and I prefer tonight whether it be
there and I prefer tonight whether it be
there and I prefer tonight whether it be seeing counselors talking to friends
seeing counselors talking to friends
seeing counselors talking to friends meditation or sport the point is you
meditation or sport the point is you
meditation or sport the point is you need to find something that works for
need to find something that works for
need to find something that works for you so for things to finish with firstly
you so for things to finish with firstly
you so for things to finish with firstly what we need to do is decide that we
what we need to do is decide that we
what we need to do is decide that we want to have positive intentions and
want to have positive intentions and
want to have positive intentions and when you made that decision you need to
when you made that decision you need to
when you made that decision you need to vanquish negative thoughts and this is
vanquish negative thoughts and this is
vanquish negative thoughts and this is something that took me real conscious
something that took me real conscious
something that took me real conscious effort to do at first but then it became
effort to do at first but then it became
effort to do at first but then it became habit and now I’m happy to say it is my
habit and now I’m happy to say it is my
habit and now I’m happy to say it is my nature secondly we need to see ourselves
nature secondly we need to see ourselves
nature secondly we need to see ourselves challenging targets reverse-engineer
challenging targets reverse-engineer
challenging targets reverse-engineer them into achievable steps plan where
them into achievable steps plan where
them into achievable steps plan where the pain is and go for it with
the pain is and go for it with
the pain is and go for it with confidence thirdly
confidence thirdly
confidence thirdly don’t get mad when people can’t see your
don’t get mad when people can’t see your
don’t get mad when people can’t see your plan and don’t understand what it is
plan and don’t understand what it is
plan and don’t understand what it is you’re going through they’re just trying
you’re going through they’re just trying
you’re going through they’re just trying to work it all all out too and equally
to work it all all out too and equally
to work it all all out too and equally if you think that someone’s just being
if you think that someone’s just being
if you think that someone’s just being stubborn maybe sit back and wonder
stubborn maybe sit back and wonder
stubborn maybe sit back and wonder whether you’re just not understanding
whether you’re just not understanding
whether you’re just not understanding their plan fully and then finally the
their plan fully and then finally the
their plan fully and then finally the next time someone calls you stubborn
next time someone calls you stubborn
next time someone calls you stubborn maybe try taking as a compliment instead
maybe try taking as a compliment instead
maybe try taking as a compliment instead thank you
thank you
thank you [Applause]
”
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