Quitters never win, and winners never quit, right?
That’s what we are told as kids;
that’s what we get drilled into us, that if you quit, you failed,
and if you failed, you are a failure.
It’s quite defining.
But I want you to consider an alternative.
What if instead of dropping out
or giving up,
quitting was the only way to win,
or at least the better way to win.
I am Jazmin, and quitting saved my career.
Have a think about the last time that someone you respect
recommended a book or a film to you,
but you didn’t think you are going to like it.
So they come to you, and they say, “Look, you are going to love it,
it’s amazing, everyone loves it, this film is my favorite,
please, will you watch it?”
You think, “This isn’t really me, but you know what, I respect you,
everyone says it’s great, I am going to watch it,
I am going to read it.”
You get started,
you’re a few pages, a few minutes in, and you are not feeling it,
but it could be a slow starter, so you carry on.
Halfway through.
You do not like this; you are certain.
So what do you do?
Do you put the book down, you turn the film off?
Or do you keep going?
You know, one voice in your head saying, “Am I the weird one?
Is something wrong with me if I don’t like this?
Everyone else likes it, it’s got great reviews.
What’s the problem with me?
But, end of the day, whatever you choose,
it’s a book; it’s a film;
that’s time you can afford to waste.
I was in danger of that being my whole life.
It needs some context.
I am a long jumper.
I have been competing internationally since I was 14 years old.
And the plan when I went to uni was always to join a group
that had a world-class coach, had an Olympic champion in the group,
and several other international athletes.
I’d have world-class facilities; it was everything I needed.
I was so excited to go.
When I got there, I got stronger;
I got faster; I got fitter; I got more powerful;
I was in peak physical condition,
but the results didn’t come.
In fact, I started to go backward.
I went from being the second best junior in the world the year before
to not even making the UK junior team.
I was devastated.
I couldn’t figure it out: I had everything that I supposedly needed right there.
This was everything that I had worked for, and it wasn’t working for me.
I couldn’t understand.
So, I was torn; I didn’t know what to do.
One part of me wanted to leave, try something else,
but another part was thinking,
“You push through no matter what,
this is supposed to be hard.
But I just couldn’t shake it, something wasn’t right.
I was unhappy, and it showed in my performance.
So I bit the bullet, and I left.
I dropped out of uni.
I left my coach in the middle of the season,
which was risky,
but I was unhappy to the point where I figured out
that without happiness the success wasn’t coming.
And I was miserable; I was ready to dropout of sport all together.
So instead, I went back to where I trained when I was at school,
I went back to my school coach.
I think this was the first time that I’d really stopped,
and instead of just listening to what everyone says –
this is how you achieve success; this is how you are happy;
this is exactly what you need.” –
I stopped and thought: what do I need?
And the answer was something different.
It wasn’t the same as what everyone had been telling me,
and that had surprised me.
You see,
I was so ready to retire from sport at 19 years old,
and I think if I hadn’t managed to find a way to reframe quitting,
to say to myself, “OK.
Is quitting losing?
Because that’s how I had always seen it –
and I hate losing, I am a terrible loser,
so bad at losing.
So when I bundled those two things together,
I have got quitting and losing,
this is something that I didn’t want to associate myself with.
But it came to a point where I went:
“This has to be the best thing for your career.”
And so,
before I quit at 19, I was ready to drop out;
instead, between the ages of 19 and 22,
I won five international medals, two national titles,
finished my law degree,
I made the Olympic final.
(Applause) (Cheering)
Thanks.
I was about to say, you know, I couldn’t finish that with:
“I won the Olympics”; the story is not like that.
Luckily, I am not talking to you from the end of a success story.
I am speaking to you from smack bang in the middle of it,
and quitting meant that I now have the chance to win in the future,
because if I’d stayed put, I wouldn’t be standing here talking to you.
I would be at home, on the phone to my mum, saying,
“Mum, remember when I was younger,
and I could have been good enough to go to the Olympics.”
So it was everything that I needed.
And I found that once I’d reframed my mindset like this,
I started to notice people;
people that I admired had done the same thing.
One of my favorite authors, Gretchen Rubin,
she’s written so many books,
she is an expert on happiness and habits,
and she runs a successful blog, podcast, and App,
and she is only able to be and do all these things because she quit.
She quit a prestigious career in law to take on writing
because she knew that law wasn’t right for her,
and she quit.
Now she is a New York Times bestselling author.
She looks like she is winning to me.
We live in an environment that a lot of things are temporary,
we’re able to change so much,
and that can be a great thing,
but it doesn’t mean the fundamental rules have changed.
Long-term commitment to one thing is still the way to get success,
but we have the opportunity to try and try and try
until we find that one thing that’s the right thing for us.
So if you need to,
I encourage you to quit with purpose.
Whether that’s making yourself happier,
making room for something or someone else in your life,
or doing a full 180
and pursuing something totally different,
know why you are quitting, and head off in the direction of winning.
So winners never quit, and quitters never win, right?
Well, not exactly.
Thank you.
(Applause) (Cheering)
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