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Smart Risk | Maili Wong | TEDxGastownWomen


all my life I played it safe and follow

all my life I played it safe and follow the path that always expected of me

the path that always expected of me

the path that always expected of me growing up in a small town as the eldest

growing up in a small town as the eldest

growing up in a small town as the eldest child and the Chinese family I worked

child and the Chinese family I worked

child and the Chinese family I worked hard to get those straight A’s you know

hard to get those straight A’s you know

hard to get those straight A’s you know I enjoy creative writing in the arts but

I enjoy creative writing in the arts but

I enjoy creative writing in the arts but instead focus my energy excelling in

instead focus my energy excelling in

instead focus my energy excelling in math sciences classical piano and when I

math sciences classical piano and when I

math sciences classical piano and when I turned 21 I felt like I finally arrived

turned 21 I felt like I finally arrived

turned 21 I felt like I finally arrived I had finally graduated from University

I had finally graduated from University

I had finally graduated from University with my business degree Chang

with my business degree Chang

with my business degree Chang top of my class check and landed the job

top of my class check and landed the job

top of my class check and landed the job my dreams as a financial analyst on Wall

my dreams as a financial analyst on Wall

my dreams as a financial analyst on Wall Street in New York the year was 2001 and

Street in New York the year was 2001 and

Street in New York the year was 2001 and I was so excited you know my heart was

I was so excited you know my heart was

I was so excited you know my heart was full of these big dreams and excitement

full of these big dreams and excitement

full of these big dreams and excitement and I was ready to take a bite out of

and I was ready to take a bite out of

and I was ready to take a bite out of that Big Apple then on my second day on

that Big Apple then on my second day on

that Big Apple then on my second day on the job September 11th 2001 everything

the job September 11th 2001 everything

the job September 11th 2001 everything changed

changed

changed two planes struck the World Trade Center

two planes struck the World Trade Center

two planes struck the World Trade Center connected to the building I was in it

connected to the building I was in it

connected to the building I was in it was 8:30 in the morning when the first

was 8:30 in the morning when the first

was 8:30 in the morning when the first plane hit the building I was coming out

plane hit the building I was coming out

plane hit the building I was coming out of a morning meeting and the entire

of a morning meeting and the entire

of a morning meeting and the entire office shook you know my hot coffee

office shook you know my hot coffee

office shook you know my hot coffee splashed all over my new black dress and

splashed all over my new black dress and

splashed all over my new black dress and shiny high heels as I scanned across the

shiny high heels as I scanned across the

shiny high heels as I scanned across the trading floor I noticed everybody was

trading floor I noticed everybody was

trading floor I noticed everybody was looking up with the big television

looking up with the big television

looking up with the big television screens and on the screens it showed a

screens and on the screens it showed a

screens and on the screens it showed a picture of one of the Twin Towers on

picture of one of the Twin Towers on

picture of one of the Twin Towers on fire with a plane sticking out of it so

fire with a plane sticking out of it so

fire with a plane sticking out of it so I asked one of the traders what happened

I asked one of the traders what happened

I asked one of the traders what happened and he casually responded looks like

and he casually responded looks like

and he casually responded looks like some pilot accidentally flew a small

some pilot accidentally flew a small

some pilot accidentally flew a small Cessna train into the side of the World

Cessna train into the side of the World

Cessna train into the side of the World Trade Center he must have been drunk

well I felt those hairs of intuition

well I felt those hairs of intuition kind of prick up on the back of my neck

kind of prick up on the back of my neck

kind of prick up on the back of my neck I had a sense that something was really

I had a sense that something was really

I had a sense that something was really wrong but not wanting to look like the

wrong but not wanting to look like the

wrong but not wanting to look like the nervous new girl on the trading floor I

nervous new girl on the trading floor I

nervous new girl on the trading floor I went back to my desk but ten minutes

went back to my desk but ten minutes

went back to my desk but ten minutes later the second plane hit the building

later the second plane hit the building

later the second plane hit the building and this time it was like a massive

and this time it was like a massive

and this time it was like a massive earthquake struck right beneath my feet

earthquake struck right beneath my feet

earthquake struck right beneath my feet and phones and computer screens went

and phones and computer screens went

and phones and computer screens went flying and then my manager shows hold on

flying and then my manager shows hold on

flying and then my manager shows hold on stay put everyone don’t go anywhere

stay put everyone don’t go anywhere

stay put everyone don’t go anywhere stock markets gonna open up in 45

stock markets gonna open up in 45

stock markets gonna open up in 45 minutes

minutes

minutes don’t leave the building I didn’t know

don’t leave the building I didn’t know

don’t leave the building I didn’t know what to do you know do I stay and follow

what to do you know do I stay and follow

what to do you know do I stay and follow my boss’s orders or do I leave and risk

my boss’s orders or do I leave and risk

my boss’s orders or do I leave and risk losing my new job I didn’t want to

losing my new job I didn’t want to

losing my new job I didn’t want to disappoint disobey and disappoint him

disappoint disobey and disappoint him

disappoint disobey and disappoint him but deep down I had the sense that

but deep down I had the sense that

but deep down I had the sense that something was very wrong

something was very wrong

something was very wrong and then I heard my mother’s voice boom

and then I heard my mother’s voice boom

and then I heard my mother’s voice boom inside my head from miles away and she

inside my head from miles away and she

inside my head from miles away and she said go and so I walked out that door

said go and so I walked out that door

said go and so I walked out that door and I ran down five flights of stairs

and I ran down five flights of stairs

and I ran down five flights of stairs and stepped out into the bright morning

and stepped out into the bright morning

and stepped out into the bright morning sunshine it was like this wall hit me

sunshine it was like this wall hit me

sunshine it was like this wall hit me this stench of burning flesh and melting

this stench of burning flesh and melting

this stench of burning flesh and melting steel it hit me and then my colleagues

steel it hit me and then my colleagues

steel it hit me and then my colleagues started screaming she said I just saw a

started screaming she said I just saw a

started screaming she said I just saw a man and a woman falling from the towers

man and a woman falling from the towers

man and a woman falling from the towers above holding hands and they were on

above holding hands and they were on

above holding hands and they were on fire I couldn’t look I had to turn away

fire I couldn’t look I had to turn away

fire I couldn’t look I had to turn away but it was too late an image burned in

but it was too late an image burned in

but it was too late an image burned in my mind imagine being those people 100

my mind imagine being those people 100

my mind imagine being those people 100 stories above ground and having to face

stories above ground and having to face

stories above ground and having to face that terrible choice and the next thing

that terrible choice and the next thing

that terrible choice and the next thing I knew I was running running as fast as

I knew I was running running as fast as

I knew I was running running as fast as I could away from those burning towers

I could away from those burning towers

I could away from those burning towers running and just streams of paper and

running and just streams of paper and

running and just streams of paper and smoke and dusts and shards of glass

smoke and dusts and shards of glass

smoke and dusts and shards of glass falling from the sky and hearing screams

falling from the sky and hearing screams

falling from the sky and hearing screams of shouts of fear and panic and blaring

of shouts of fear and panic and blaring

of shouts of fear and panic and blaring sirens from every direction and then I

sirens from every direction and then I

sirens from every direction and then I had to stop and catch my breath my

had to stop and catch my breath my

had to stop and catch my breath my throat burning from the smoke and dust

throat burning from the smoke and dust

throat burning from the smoke and dust my feet bleeding and blistered from

my feet bleeding and blistered from

my feet bleeding and blistered from running in high heels and I just started

running in high heels and I just started

running in high heels and I just started crying and I felt myself crumble onto

crying and I felt myself crumble onto

crying and I felt myself crumble onto the street corner and found myself in a

the street corner and found myself in a

the street corner and found myself in a ball feeling just so scared

ball feeling just so scared

ball feeling just so scared vulnerable and alone I felt powerless

vulnerable and alone I felt powerless

vulnerable and alone I felt powerless and as I buried my face in my hands that

and as I buried my face in my hands that

and as I buried my face in my hands that image of those burning people just kept

image of those burning people just kept

image of those burning people just kept flashing before my eyes

flashing before my eyes

flashing before my eyes and I realized that I did have something

and I realized that I did have something

and I realized that I did have something I had my life and I just felt grateful

I had my life and I just felt grateful

I had my life and I just felt grateful to be alive but then I felt guilty you

to be alive but then I felt guilty you

to be alive but then I felt guilty you know why did those people suffer that

know why did those people suffer that

know why did those people suffer that tragic early death well I was spared and

tragic early death well I was spared and

tragic early death well I was spared and I had his overwhelming sense that there

I had his overwhelming sense that there

I had his overwhelming sense that there had to be a greater purpose and so in

had to be a greater purpose and so in

had to be a greater purpose and so in that moment I realized that life can be

that moment I realized that life can be

that moment I realized that life can be so short and we have limited time to

so short and we have limited time to

so short and we have limited time to make our lives really matter and so I

make our lives really matter and so I

make our lives really matter and so I slowly picked myself up off the ground

slowly picked myself up off the ground

slowly picked myself up off the ground and put one foot in front of the other

and put one foot in front of the other

and put one foot in front of the other and started walking and I walked for

and started walking and I walked for

and started walking and I walked for hours into the evening utilizing that

hours into the evening utilizing that

hours into the evening utilizing that everything I needed to survive was

everything I needed to survive was

everything I needed to survive was already within me I had the power to

already within me I had the power to

already within me I had the power to make choices to find a way forward and

make choices to find a way forward and

make choices to find a way forward and that evening as I walked I realized that

that evening as I walked I realized that

that evening as I walked I realized that all my life you know I’ve been

all my life you know I’ve been

all my life you know I’ve been conforming to what I was conditioned to

conforming to what I was conditioned to

conforming to what I was conditioned to believe was safe all to have everything

believe was safe all to have everything

believe was safe all to have everything perfectly lined up I mean how did I get

perfectly lined up I mean how did I get

perfectly lined up I mean how did I get it all right got in the grades gotten

it all right got in the grades gotten

it all right got in the grades gotten the job the apartment close to the

the job the apartment close to the

the job the apartment close to the office just so I can have everything

office just so I can have everything

office just so I can have everything under my complete control and yet it was

under my complete control and yet it was

under my complete control and yet it was the shock of the unexpected they

the shock of the unexpected they

the shock of the unexpected they completely destroyed the entire

completely destroyed the entire

completely destroyed the entire foundation of my sense of safety and so

foundation of my sense of safety and so

foundation of my sense of safety and so I asked myself if playing it safe still

I asked myself if playing it safe still

I asked myself if playing it safe still left me exposed to all these risks could

left me exposed to all these risks could

left me exposed to all these risks could taking risk actually give me greater

taking risk actually give me greater

taking risk actually give me greater strength I had to find out so I spent

strength I had to find out so I spent

strength I had to find out so I spent the next five years of my career living

the next five years of my career living

the next five years of my career living and working in New York City carving out

and working in New York City carving out

and working in New York City carving out a career studying of all things risk I

a career studying of all things risk I

a career studying of all things risk I became an expert on how to manage and

became an expert on how to manage and

became an expert on how to manage and evaluate risk and in that process

evaluate risk and in that process

evaluate risk and in that process discovered a roadmap for taking better

discovered a roadmap for taking better

discovered a roadmap for taking better risks in life and in business that

risks in life and in business that

risks in life and in business that stacked the odds in your favor and this

stacked the odds in your favor and this

stacked the odds in your favor and this rule map consists of three important

rule map consists of three important

rule map consists of three important guideposts I’d like to share with you

guideposts I’d like to share with you

guideposts I’d like to share with you today

today

today those guideposts are purpose people and

those guideposts are purpose people and

those guideposts are purpose people and perspective so that first guy poses

perspective so that first guy poses

perspective so that first guy poses purpose

purpose

purpose have you ever thought to yourself that

have you ever thought to yourself that

have you ever thought to yourself that you’re here on this verse today to serve

you’re here on this verse today to serve

you’re here on this verse today to serve a greater purpose

a greater purpose

a greater purpose well as my career progressed I realized

well as my career progressed I realized

well as my career progressed I realized that my purpose was no longer about

that my purpose was no longer about

that my purpose was no longer about making it to that executive suite no

making it to that executive suite no

making it to that executive suite no longer did that even seem relevant

longer did that even seem relevant

longer did that even seem relevant instead I felt so grateful to have

instead I felt so grateful to have

instead I felt so grateful to have survived at fateful day of 9/11 then I

survived at fateful day of 9/11 then I

survived at fateful day of 9/11 then I felt I had the chance now actually the

felt I had the chance now actually the

felt I had the chance now actually the responsibility really to put my skills

responsibility really to put my skills

responsibility really to put my skills knowledge and gifts to work in a way

knowledge and gifts to work in a way

knowledge and gifts to work in a way that helps others it makes a positive

that helps others it makes a positive

that helps others it makes a positive impact the second guideposts is people I

impact the second guideposts is people I

impact the second guideposts is people I learned how important it is to reach out

learned how important it is to reach out

learned how important it is to reach out and ask for help even when you don’t

and ask for help even when you don’t

and ask for help even when you don’t think you want or deserve it in my most

think you want or deserve it in my most

think you want or deserve it in my most vulnerable moment I felt alone amongst

vulnerable moment I felt alone amongst

vulnerable moment I felt alone amongst the crowds of strangers running past me

the crowds of strangers running past me

the crowds of strangers running past me in the chaos and I was terrified to ask

in the chaos and I was terrified to ask

in the chaos and I was terrified to ask for help

for help

for help afraid of looking weak or needy but it

afraid of looking weak or needy but it

afraid of looking weak or needy but it was a stranger who gave me a helping

was a stranger who gave me a helping

was a stranger who gave me a helping hand the evening of 9/11 as I knocked on

hand the evening of 9/11 as I knocked on

hand the evening of 9/11 as I knocked on her door with nowhere else to stay

her door with nowhere else to stay

her door with nowhere else to stay someone I barely knew who let me in and

someone I barely knew who let me in and

someone I barely knew who let me in and gave me shelter and in the years that

gave me shelter and in the years that

gave me shelter and in the years that followed it was the love of the people

followed it was the love of the people

followed it was the love of the people who matter to me most my closest friends

who matter to me most my closest friends

who matter to me most my closest friends and family who supported me and helped

and family who supported me and helped

and family who supported me and helped me find my power again and that third

me find my power again and that third

me find my power again and that third perspective is really the key I slowly

perspective is really the key I slowly

perspective is really the key I slowly gained a new perspective on taking risk

gained a new perspective on taking risk

gained a new perspective on taking risk a willingness really to take a risk and

a willingness really to take a risk and

a willingness really to take a risk and not be afraid of failing because I

not be afraid of failing because I

not be afraid of failing because I realized that all my life it was fear

realized that all my life it was fear

realized that all my life it was fear that kept me choosing the safe path fear

that kept me choosing the safe path fear

that kept me choosing the safe path fear of failure fear of not being smart

of failure fear of not being smart

of failure fear of not being smart enough not tough enough to Asian or to

enough not tough enough to Asian or to

enough not tough enough to Asian or to female and I buried all those fears

female and I buried all those fears

female and I buried all those fears under layers and layers of mental

under layers and layers of mental

under layers and layers of mental toughness of telling myself you can do

toughness of telling myself you can do

toughness of telling myself you can do this suck it up you got this and

this suck it up you got this and

this suck it up you got this and soldiering on all in an attempt to keep

soldiering on all in an attempt to keep

soldiering on all in an attempt to keep everything under my control I mean kind

everything under my control I mean kind

everything under my control I mean kind of worked from a career perspective in

of worked from a career perspective in

of worked from a career perspective in New York because that behavior was

New York because that behavior was

New York because that behavior was rewarded with promotions rewards

rewarded with promotions rewards

rewarded with promotions rewards accolades

accolades

accolades I knew we could get results but at the

I knew we could get results but at the

I knew we could get results but at the same time it still felt so deeply on

same time it still felt so deeply on

same time it still felt so deeply on filling what I needed to do instead was

filling what I needed to do instead was

filling what I needed to do instead was build those inner muscles of courage and

build those inner muscles of courage and

build those inner muscles of courage and resilience they come from taking a risk

resilience they come from taking a risk

resilience they come from taking a risk and feeling the pain of failure and

and feeling the pain of failure and

and feeling the pain of failure and learning to reach out for help and

learning to reach out for help and

learning to reach out for help and getting back up again and doing that

getting back up again and doing that

getting back up again and doing that again and again until the risk pays off

again and again until the risk pays off

again and again until the risk pays off and so I did it I took a risk I quit my

and so I did it I took a risk I quit my

and so I did it I took a risk I quit my job and left New York City gave up the

job and left New York City gave up the

job and left New York City gave up the title the prestige the big city salary

title the prestige the big city salary

title the prestige the big city salary and walked away from it all all to move

and walked away from it all all to move

and walked away from it all all to move back to my hometown to start working on

back to my hometown to start working on

back to my hometown to start working on making my new purpose a reality well

making my new purpose a reality well

making my new purpose a reality well that was more than 10 years ago looking

that was more than 10 years ago looking

that was more than 10 years ago looking back was that risk worth it absolutely

back was that risk worth it absolutely

back was that risk worth it absolutely by facing my fears and taking more risks

by facing my fears and taking more risks

by facing my fears and taking more risks I continue to build that muscle of

I continue to build that muscle of

I continue to build that muscle of resilience and I feel stronger than ever

resilience and I feel stronger than ever

resilience and I feel stronger than ever and by allowing that emotional feminine

and by allowing that emotional feminine

and by allowing that emotional feminine intuitive energy bubble up above those

intuitive energy bubble up above those

intuitive energy bubble up above those layers and work together with my

layers and work together with my

layers and work together with my scientific logical mind is magnified my

scientific logical mind is magnified my

scientific logical mind is magnified my energy and it’s allowed me to help more

energy and it’s allowed me to help more

energy and it’s allowed me to help more people take purposeful action at a whole

people take purposeful action at a whole

people take purposeful action at a whole new level and I’ve never felt more

new level and I’ve never felt more

new level and I’ve never felt more powerful in my life

but until today I’ve never shared so

but until today I’ve never shared so much about my 9/11 story why now because

much about my 9/11 story why now because

much about my 9/11 story why now because almost every day I end up meeting people

almost every day I end up meeting people

almost every day I end up meeting people who have suffered their own version of

who have suffered their own version of

who have suffered their own version of 9/11 their own shock of the unexpected

9/11 their own shock of the unexpected

9/11 their own shock of the unexpected be a divorce loss of a loved one or even

be a divorce loss of a loved one or even

be a divorce loss of a loved one or even a major some financial setback

a major some financial setback

a major some financial setback especially a woman why is it so many of

especially a woman why is it so many of

especially a woman why is it so many of us avoid making important financial

us avoid making important financial

us avoid making important financial decisions in a facade of financially

decisions in a facade of financially

decisions in a facade of financially playing it safe due to fear and we end

playing it safe due to fear and we end

playing it safe due to fear and we end up giving away our power so instead of

up giving away our power so instead of

up giving away our power so instead of playing it safe I’m an advocate for

playing it safe I’m an advocate for

playing it safe I’m an advocate for taking smart risk feel the fear and do

taking smart risk feel the fear and do

taking smart risk feel the fear and do it anyway because true power is

it anyway because true power is

it anyway because true power is highlighted in times of challenge

highlighted in times of challenge

highlighted in times of challenge ironically it was the shock of the

ironically it was the shock of the

ironically it was the shock of the unexpected that helped me find my power

unexpected that helped me find my power

unexpected that helped me find my power within and give it life and it’s those

within and give it life and it’s those

within and give it life and it’s those unexpected challenges that shape us and

unexpected challenges that shape us and

unexpected challenges that shape us and stretch us and ultimately show us what

stretch us and ultimately show us what

stretch us and ultimately show us what we’re really made of so how about you

we’re really made of so how about you

we’re really made of so how about you how are you still playing it safe what

how are you still playing it safe what

how are you still playing it safe what might your world look like if you

might your world look like if you

might your world look like if you actually took a smart risk and it paid

actually took a smart risk and it paid

actually took a smart risk and it paid off how would it feel to stand

off how would it feel to stand

off how would it feel to stand powerfully facing the future confident

powerfully facing the future confident

powerfully facing the future confident in your purpose what might your life

in your purpose what might your life

in your purpose what might your life look like 10 20 30 years from now if the

look like 10 20 30 years from now if the

look like 10 20 30 years from now if the infinite power within you was ignited

infinite power within you was ignited

infinite power within you was ignited and nurtured to grow I dare you to take

and nurtured to grow I dare you to take

and nurtured to grow I dare you to take a smart risk and find out thank you

”

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