I have a question for everyone that question is what defines you as a person
question is what defines you as a person
question is what defines you as a person what makes you you a lot of us tend to
what makes you you a lot of us tend to
what makes you you a lot of us tend to define ourselves through our physical
define ourselves through our physical
define ourselves through our physical image of jobs or bank balance and a lot
image of jobs or bank balance and a lot
image of jobs or bank balance and a lot of the time to what others have to say
of the time to what others have to say
of the time to what others have to say about us I used to find myself through
about us I used to find myself through
about us I used to find myself through three things in high school I was quite
three things in high school I was quite
three things in high school I was quite the people pleaser I wanted everyone to
the people pleaser I wanted everyone to
the people pleaser I wanted everyone to like me because I thought that the more
like me because I thought that the more
like me because I thought that the more likeable I was the further that I would
likeable I was the further that I would
likeable I was the further that I would get in life because being popular was so
get in life because being popular was so
get in life because being popular was so cool and I tried so hard to become this
cool and I tried so hard to become this
cool and I tried so hard to become this person that everyone would like a
person that everyone would like a
person that everyone would like a majority of the time I was living my
majority of the time I was living my
majority of the time I was living my life through other people’s opinions of
life through other people’s opinions of
life through other people’s opinions of me from the age of 16 I started to
me from the age of 16 I started to
me from the age of 16 I started to obsess over my weight so I wanted to
obsess over my weight so I wanted to
obsess over my weight so I wanted to look like the cover girl in Cosmo
look like the cover girl in Cosmo
look like the cover girl in Cosmo magazine you know the Photoshop one my
magazine you know the Photoshop one my
magazine you know the Photoshop one my diet consisted of just salads and used
diet consisted of just salads and used
diet consisted of just salads and used to look chic on every single calorie
to look chic on every single calorie
to look chic on every single calorie that my body was consuming I even went
that my body was consuming I even went
that my body was consuming I even went to the extreme of harming my body for
to the extreme of harming my body for
to the extreme of harming my body for many years to try and get rid of the
many years to try and get rid of the
many years to try and get rid of the food that I’d eaten because I needed the
food that I’d eaten because I needed the
food that I’d eaten because I needed the thigh gap and I needed the thin waist I
thigh gap and I needed the thin waist I
thigh gap and I needed the thin waist I was in a relationship for the last two
was in a relationship for the last two
was in a relationship for the last two years of school
years of school
years of school and I truly believe that my happiness
and I truly believe that my happiness
and I truly believe that my happiness came from someone else giving it to me I
came from someone else giving it to me I
came from someone else giving it to me I had put so much pressure on this other
had put so much pressure on this other
had put so much pressure on this other person to be everything to me to make me
person to be everything to me to make me
person to be everything to me to make me feel worthy and make me feel like I was
feel worthy and make me feel like I was
feel worthy and make me feel like I was enough and then when the relationship
enough and then when the relationship
enough and then when the relationship ended I was completely broken I didn’t
ended I was completely broken I didn’t
ended I was completely broken I didn’t know how I was gonna stand on my own and
know how I was gonna stand on my own and
know how I was gonna stand on my own and I felt like I lost a little sense of
I felt like I lost a little sense of
I felt like I lost a little sense of identity that I had and I was terrified
identity that I had and I was terrified
identity that I had and I was terrified of being alone I know today that the
of being alone I know today that the
of being alone I know today that the only reason I felt so empty and broken
only reason I felt so empty and broken
only reason I felt so empty and broken inside was because I didn’t know myself
inside was because I didn’t know myself
inside was because I didn’t know myself at all so it was the hardest five months
at all so it was the hardest five months
at all so it was the hardest five months hardest and most emotional five months
hardest and most emotional five months
hardest and most emotional five months of my life and I didn’t know how to deal
of my life and I didn’t know how to deal
of my life and I didn’t know how to deal with how I was feeling all this pain or
with how I was feeling all this pain or
with how I was feeling all this pain or this emotion and one day I called the
this emotion and one day I called the
this emotion and one day I called the person that I used to be with and I
person that I used to be with and I
person that I used to be with and I asked are you happy and he said yes and
asked are you happy and he said yes and
asked are you happy and he said yes and it was from that moment that I decided
it was from that moment that I decided
it was from that moment that I decided that I was going to be happy
that I was going to be happy
that I was going to be happy you and that I was gonna find a
you and that I was gonna find a
you and that I was gonna find a happiness that worked for me that I
happiness that worked for me that I
happiness that worked for me that I wasn’t going to deal with this pain and
wasn’t going to deal with this pain and
wasn’t going to deal with this pain and these waves of emotion anymore so I
these waves of emotion anymore so I
these waves of emotion anymore so I started journaling my breakup I wrote
started journaling my breakup I wrote
started journaling my breakup I wrote down my feelings and my thoughts and
down my feelings and my thoughts and
down my feelings and my thoughts and recently looking back on my journal I
recently looking back on my journal I
recently looking back on my journal I realized how would end my writing off
realized how would end my writing off
realized how would end my writing off with positive affirmations towards
with positive affirmations towards
with positive affirmations towards myself things like you can do this kids
myself things like you can do this kids
myself things like you can do this kids and I’m a huge fan of quotes so I was
and I’m a huge fan of quotes so I was
and I’m a huge fan of quotes so I was putting quotes all around my room in
putting quotes all around my room in
putting quotes all around my room in places that I could see is the and I
places that I could see is the and I
places that I could see is the and I started reading motivational books and
started reading motivational books and
started reading motivational books and positivity and powerful thoughts and how
positivity and powerful thoughts and how
positivity and powerful thoughts and how to change your mind I was trying
to change your mind I was trying
to change your mind I was trying everything to get through how I was
everything to get through how I was
everything to get through how I was feeling something that seemed so
feeling something that seemed so
feeling something that seemed so impossible but just like there’s
impossible but just like there’s
impossible but just like there’s positive affirmations that I was writing
positive affirmations that I was writing
positive affirmations that I was writing towards myself I knew that I had the
towards myself I knew that I had the
towards myself I knew that I had the strength to move on I just didn’t know
strength to move on I just didn’t know
strength to move on I just didn’t know how strong actually was so I had to pick
how strong actually was so I had to pick
how strong actually was so I had to pick myself up in some way and I did I slowly
myself up in some way and I did I slowly
myself up in some way and I did I slowly started to and for the first time in my
started to and for the first time in my
started to and for the first time in my life I realized just how capable I
life I realized just how capable I
life I realized just how capable I actually was of standing on my own and
actually was of standing on my own and
actually was of standing on my own and being my own person I just had to learn
being my own person I just had to learn
being my own person I just had to learn through loss that all I needed to have
through loss that all I needed to have
through loss that all I needed to have was me so for the whole of high school I
was me so for the whole of high school I
was me so for the whole of high school I laid those three things define me other
laid those three things define me other
laid those three things define me other people’s opinions of me my weights a
people’s opinions of me my weights a
people’s opinions of me my weights a relationship and by allowing these
relationship and by allowing these
relationship and by allowing these things to define me I let them control
things to define me I let them control
things to define me I let them control and consume my life and I was looking
and consume my life and I was looking
and consume my life and I was looking for happiness in those three places but
for happiness in those three places but
for happiness in those three places but I could never ever seem to quite find it
I could never ever seem to quite find it
I could never ever seem to quite find it I believe that happiness is something
I believe that happiness is something
I believe that happiness is something that you create for yourself by yourself
that you create for yourself by yourself
that you create for yourself by yourself on your own terms the world that we live
on your own terms the world that we live
on your own terms the world that we live in is something that we create for
in is something that we create for
in is something that we create for ourselves and I’m not talking about
ourselves and I’m not talking about
ourselves and I’m not talking about society’s world I’m talking about the
society’s world I’m talking about the
society’s world I’m talking about the individual world that each and every one
individual world that each and every one
individual world that each and every one of us experience because as we shape our
of us experience because as we shape our
of us experience because as we shape our world and our lives we shape ourselves
world and our lives we shape ourselves
world and our lives we shape ourselves too so I’ve learned through picking
too so I’ve learned through picking
too so I’ve learned through picking myself up through a breakup and letting
myself up through a breakup and letting
myself up through a breakup and letting go of the things that I thought to find
go of the things that I thought to find
go of the things that I thought to find me just how important it was for me to
me just how important it was for me to
me just how important it was for me to take the time out to figure myself out
take the time out to figure myself out
take the time out to figure myself out get inside my own mind and understand
get inside my own mind and understand
get inside my own mind and understand myself and there’s only one part of the
myself and there’s only one part of the
myself and there’s only one part of the universe we can all be certain about
universe we can all be certain about
universe we can all be certain about improving and that’s ourselves I’m
improving and that’s ourselves I’m
improving and that’s ourselves I’m currently reading a book called the 15
currently reading a book called the 15
currently reading a book called the 15 invaluable laws but John Maxwell and in
invaluable laws but John Maxwell and in
invaluable laws but John Maxwell and in this book he says something that really
this book he says something that really
this book he says something that really made me think he says as children our
made me think he says as children our
made me think he says as children our bodies
bodies
bodies automatically a year goes by we get
automatically a year goes by we get
automatically a year goes by we get taller we become stronger become capable
taller we become stronger become capable
taller we become stronger become capable of doing more things facing new
of doing more things facing new
of doing more things facing new challenges but a lot of people carry
challenges but a lot of people carry
challenges but a lot of people carry with them a subconscious belief into
with them a subconscious belief into
with them a subconscious belief into adulthood that spiritual mental and
adulthood that spiritual mental and
adulthood that spiritual mental and emotional growth occurs automatically to
emotional growth occurs automatically to
emotional growth occurs automatically to now just think about that for a second
now just think about that for a second
now just think about that for a second because I was one of those people that
because I was one of those people that
because I was one of those people that believed that those things occur
believed that those things occur
believed that those things occur automatically but it’s not personal
automatically but it’s not personal
automatically but it’s not personal growth has to be intentional we have to
growth has to be intentional we have to
growth has to be intentional we have to take ownership of our growth process
take ownership of our growth process
take ownership of our growth process because we do not simply improve by
because we do not simply improve by
because we do not simply improve by accidents think about a close friend of
accidents think about a close friend of
accidents think about a close friend of yours the longer you spend time with
yours the longer you spend time with
yours the longer you spend time with them the more you learn about them and
them the more you learn about them and
them the more you learn about them and the closer you become and it’s exactly
the closer you become and it’s exactly
the closer you become and it’s exactly the same with yourself the more you
the same with yourself the more you
the same with yourself the more you focus your energy on getting to know
focus your energy on getting to know
focus your energy on getting to know yourself spending time by yourself the
yourself spending time by yourself the
yourself spending time by yourself the more you will learn about yourself and
more you will learn about yourself and
more you will learn about yourself and the closely who becomes yourself and let
the closely who becomes yourself and let
the closely who becomes yourself and let me tell you that is such a beautiful
me tell you that is such a beautiful
me tell you that is such a beautiful feeling when you realize how close you
feeling when you realize how close you
feeling when you realize how close you are becoming to yourself I’ve decided to
are becoming to yourself I’ve decided to
are becoming to yourself I’ve decided to make myself a priority in my life and
make myself a priority in my life and
make myself a priority in my life and self discovery is the best gift that I’m
self discovery is the best gift that I’m
self discovery is the best gift that I’m giving myself and it’s the one gift I
giving myself and it’s the one gift I
giving myself and it’s the one gift I wish I could get each and every one of
wish I could get each and every one of
wish I could get each and every one of you you don’t have it already it has
you you don’t have it already it has
you you don’t have it already it has allowed me to grow in my own terms
allowed me to grow in my own terms
allowed me to grow in my own terms without someone else telling me how to
without someone else telling me how to
without someone else telling me how to and by doing this I’m becoming the
and by doing this I’m becoming the
and by doing this I’m becoming the person who wants to be rather than the
person who wants to be rather than the
person who wants to be rather than the person I was told to be and a lot of
person I was told to be and a lot of
person I was told to be and a lot of people think that putting herself first
people think that putting herself first
people think that putting herself first is selfish but putting yourself first
is selfish but putting yourself first
is selfish but putting yourself first simply means taking for me it simply
simply means taking for me it simply
simply means taking for me it simply means taking a stand looking at yourself
means taking a stand looking at yourself
means taking a stand looking at yourself and saying that I’m going to do
and saying that I’m going to do
and saying that I’m going to do everything in my power to see myself
everything in my power to see myself
everything in my power to see myself succeed and reach my dreams I’m gonna
succeed and reach my dreams I’m gonna
succeed and reach my dreams I’m gonna make the best choices in my life
make the best choices in my life
make the best choices in my life including the people that I surround
including the people that I surround
including the people that I surround myself with people that add nothing but
myself with people that add nothing but
myself with people that add nothing but value to me and once you decide to love
value to me and once you decide to love
value to me and once you decide to love who you are you can then take that love
who you are you can then take that love
who you are you can then take that love that you have for yourself and spread it
that you have for yourself and spread it
that you have for yourself and spread it to other people because without that
to other people because without that
to other people because without that self-love you limit your ability to pour
self-love you limit your ability to pour
self-love you limit your ability to pour into the lives of other people and add
into the lives of other people and add
into the lives of other people and add value to them living the best version of
value to them living the best version of
value to them living the best version of yourself inspires other people to live
yourself inspires other people to live
yourself inspires other people to live the best version of themselves – I was
the best version of themselves – I was
the best version of themselves – I was speaking to one of my friends the other
speaking to one of my friends the other
speaking to one of my friends the other day and she asked me two questions she
day and she asked me two questions she
day and she asked me two questions she said katelynn how did you decide that
said katelynn how did you decide that
said katelynn how did you decide that you wanted to make a change in your life
you wanted to make a change in your life
you wanted to make a change in your life within yourself and your mindset and
within yourself and your mindset and
within yourself and your mindset and secondly
secondly
secondly how did you make it stick so I had to
how did you make it stick so I had to
how did you make it stick so I had to think quite hard about what she asked me
think quite hard about what she asked me
think quite hard about what she asked me but I said to her I knew that I wanted
but I said to her I knew that I wanted
but I said to her I knew that I wanted to make a change in my life the moment
to make a change in my life the moment
to make a change in my life the moment that I decided that I was going to be
that I decided that I was going to be
that I decided that I was going to be the only person that was going to Turman
the only person that was going to Turman
the only person that was going to Turman my happiness that I was going to be the
my happiness that I was going to be the
my happiness that I was going to be the only person I was going to define me not
only person I was going to define me not
only person I was going to define me not those three things and how I made a
those three things and how I made a
those three things and how I made a stick
stick
stick I pushed I pushed through all the
I pushed I pushed through all the
I pushed I pushed through all the negative thoughts I pushed through all
negative thoughts I pushed through all
negative thoughts I pushed through all the negative self-talk and it wasn’t
the negative self-talk and it wasn’t
the negative self-talk and it wasn’t easy easy
easy easy
easy easy it’s never easy but I always had a
it’s never easy but I always had a
it’s never easy but I always had a craving to know myself deep and if you
craving to know myself deep and if you
craving to know myself deep and if you want anything that badly anything is
want anything that badly anything is
want anything that badly anything is possible
possible
possible I know that the relationship that I have
I know that the relationship that I have
I know that the relationship that I have with myself is the most important
with myself is the most important
with myself is the most important relationship the relationship that you
relationship the relationship that you
relationship the relationship that you have with yourself is the most important
have with yourself is the most important
have with yourself is the most important relationship and how you see yourself
relationship and how you see yourself
relationship and how you see yourself and how you treat yourself is how you
and how you treat yourself is how you
and how you treat yourself is how you see and how you treat other people how
see and how you treat other people how
see and how you treat other people how can you expect to give love if you can’t
can you expect to give love if you can’t
can you expect to give love if you can’t give love to yourself first ask yourself
give love to yourself first ask yourself
give love to yourself first ask yourself the day if the relationships you have in
the day if the relationships you have in
the day if the relationships you have in your life by adding value to you or they
your life by adding value to you or they
your life by adding value to you or they help you grow into the person you want
help you grow into the person you want
help you grow into the person you want to become and then ask yourself but am i
to become and then ask yourself but am i
to become and then ask yourself but am i adding value to me and these two
adding value to me and these two
adding value to me and these two questions are very important because the
questions are very important because the
questions are very important because the people that you surround yourself with
people that you surround yourself with
people that you surround yourself with in life have a very big impact and
in life have a very big impact and
in life have a very big impact and influence on you and your growth but you
influence on you and your growth but you
influence on you and your growth but you have the biggest impact and influence on
have the biggest impact and influence on
have the biggest impact and influence on you so if the answer to these questions
you so if the answer to these questions
you so if the answer to these questions are no then decide today it’s maybe make
are no then decide today it’s maybe make
are no then decide today it’s maybe make a change and if you decide to make that
a change and if you decide to make that
a change and if you decide to make that change don’t just place a small amount
change don’t just place a small amount
change don’t just place a small amount of value on yourself because rest
of value on yourself because rest
of value on yourself because rest assured the world will not raise your
assured the world will not raise your
assured the world will not raise your price know your worth
price know your worth
price know your worth start focusing yourself developing
start focusing yourself developing
start focusing yourself developing yourself improving yourself good things
yourself improving yourself good things
yourself improving yourself good things will come and know that the space
will come and know that the space
will come and know that the space between where you are now currently and
between where you are now currently and
between where you are now currently and where you want to be is growth and the
where you want to be is growth and the
where you want to be is growth and the thing called life that happens in
thing called life that happens in
thing called life that happens in between is hard but it’s really really
between is hard but it’s really really
between is hard but it’s really really beautiful thank you
beautiful thank you
beautiful thank you [Applause]
”
Be First to Comment