“You know, I love my husband.
We built a beautiful family, we get along very well.
In fact, there is only one thing that has never really worked between us,
it’s sex.
I do not want it.
My husband thinks I have a problem, I’m stuck,
that it is absolutely necessary that I go to consult.
I just think it’s not my thing.
There are women for whom it is important,
and for other women, and I’m in that category.
Well, that’s what I thought.
The years have passed,
we have more or less accommodated,
until the day where…
until the day I met a man.
A man with whom I get along extremely well.
A man I admire.
A man for whom I have a mad desire.
A man with whom I feel so much woman. “
Hey, I’m fine, I’m not telling you my life.
There are some who are freaking out.
Do not worry,
I’m not telling you my life, though,
just, what am I telling you tonight,
it’s word for word,
what women have entrusted to me most in the secret of my cabinet.
Yes, I see unfaithful women.
And there you say to yourself, “How! But it’s a man thing, infidelity.
It’s well known, they have it in their blood,
it’s in their genes,
they are much more unfaithful than women. “
Absolutely not.
Because women are the champion of all categories of guilt.
They think that when there is a problem in their relationship, it’s their fault.
They think
that if they do not feel sexual desire towards their beloved husband,
or for whom they should have desire, by definition,
Well, it’s because of them, it’s because they’re stuck.
So, they do not dare – compared to guilt –
tell their husband what is wrong with fear of hurting.
They are afraid of hurting each other,
they prefer the little lies,
rather than tell a hurtful truth.
In fact, in reality,
they are afraid of feeling responsible for the misfortune of the one they love.
There is no better field
to develop an extramarital relationship.
Because this is first and foremost a story of lies.
But the truth, the truth of these women that they dare not tell their husbands,
it is very simple, and I will tell you:
“Honey, you do not make me dream. “
(Laughter)
But it’s horrible to say something like the man we love.
I am going to tell you,
it will always be less terrible or painful for him,
only the day he surprises you while enjoying in the arms of another.
No common measure.
Really, believe me.
Why do I tell you about women’s infidelity?
A certain cause of the infidelity that I see in my cabinet,
because I have only unfaithful women.
I had to have five unfaithful men to break everything,
otherwise, I only had women.
Why am I talking to you today?
It seems to me that this experience says something about our society.
For more than half a century,
the feminists sent to walk
the Snow White and Sleeping Beauty,
to encourage us, women, to become actresses of our own lives.
I completely adhere to the project.
But, when you think about it a little bit,
these princesses, they were awakened to desire by the kiss of a prince.
Of a good knight.
A man who had braved all the dangers, who had killed the dragon.
A man who is invested with a place in our society.
A man who fights for a noble cause.
A man who rides horseback, who is courageous, who is an adventurer,
and who certainly has sublime abs. (Laughter)
They never showed them to me at Disney, but I’m sure.
Male solidarity in my opinion.
A small parenthesis on the abs, must I tell you,
because we still believe, in our time,
that for us women, the most important is the charm.
Not especially. Okay ?
A beautiful body, it can help too.
Sometimes I have women saying to me, “Well, I do not want my husband. “
I say, “But bring me your husband. “
(Laughter)
The husband arrives.
“But ma’am, I understand. “
(Laughs) (Applause)
That’s not what I say.
It’s not good to say that, but hey, it’s the truth, what?
I can say, “Madam, ok, you do not want your husband,
I hear well,
but do other women want your husband? “
(Laughter)
White.
(Laughter)
“How do you want to desire it if nobody wants it? “
No, but you have to understand something,
is that we want a person,
when other people that we value, that we admire,
shows us that this person is someone desirable.
But the problem, when we get married,
you are proud, you dress very well, you and your husband are beautiful.
Why ? You say to everyone, “Hey, the man who is there, sublime?
Well, it’s over, you can not desire it anymore.
Why ? Because he is mine. “
And the same for the man:
“I tell my whole community that I am coming out of the field of seduction.
That now I am the husband of, the wife of,
and the future father of my children. “
And suddenly, the other loses its power of attraction.
If I’m seen that way,
I no longer become a man seen in its own right.
It’s an important thing. Closed parenthesis.
Wait, where was I with my princesses?
I come back to my princesses at the con.
Princesses to the con,
but still, they are typing guys who have the mouth, they. (Laughter)
While we, how to say,
the idea is that they are typing guys who have mouths,
and not nice little husbands …
(Laughter)
who change their baby’s diapers,
who vacuum at five o’clock in the afternoon,
who go to the market and say:
“Honey, I’m going to buy vegetables to cook good meals.
But especially no meat, because killing animals, it hurts them. “
(Laughter)
Dragons, whom they killed, our princes.
No, worse, finally me, in any case, I find worse,
men who wear their babies in slings.
(Laughter)
We have never seen so far in the human species,
women being exhilarated by men who are fathers at home.
It does not work like that. Okay.
The problem in this representation:
the desire does not work that way,
but you know, the drama in this story,
and I think so for all the men present,
it is we who wanted it.
(Laughter)
The baby’s blow in a sling: “Ah, that’s so cute. “
(Laughter)
It is we who ask them, and we regret it.
(Laughter)
These princesses are not awakened by the kiss of a macho husband
who violates and despises a woman for lack of self-confidence.
But the problem,
it is because today’s men often fall into these two pitfalls.
Between the nice husband and the macho husband,
they do not always know very well how to be.
The problem is that women suffer.
We wanted equality, but we often learned about undifferentiation.
We became virilized and destabilized.
They do not make us dream anymore,
and the sexual union between a man and a woman is threatened.
And it’s still stupid, it’s the best thing to live on Earth.
(Laughter)
For a sexual union
– why do I talk to you about that, sexual intimacy,
it’s because it seems to me that we see there,
the illustration may be the most perfect of a happy mix.
For this communion of people to exist,
so that this agreement between two so different beings is possible,
two prior identities must first be
constructed, assumed and affirmed.
Otherwise, we take the risk of the merger.
The merger is extremely comforting.
It’s one and one is one. It is too beautiful.
Yes, but which of the two?
Who says fusion always says destruction.
One sucks the other, the other is asphyxiated, we can breathe more,
and one day, we wake up, we do not know who we are,
but because we never knew who we were.
Because instead of wondering, we started as a couple
in the hope that the couple gives me a reason to exist,
gives meaning to my existence.
It’s a dead end.
If I do not have a constructed identity,
this relationship, this mix, it is dangerous.
Because I can not affirm myself in front of the other.
And here I become the nice girl who does not want to hurt her husband,
and the kind boy who does everything to please his wife.
Because I do all this
in the hope that the other confirms to me that I am someone of kindness.
I lose my freedom.
In the fusion, this face to face is no longer possible,
and the desire goes out.
In order to build one’s identity one must first take a time.
A particular time when one asks oneself great questions about one’s own life.
Building an identity requires knowing what has been passed on to me.
What is the legacy I received?
What values did I receive?
What are the pillars in my life?
The inheritance, the transmission of knowing who I am.
If I do not know where I come from, I can not know where I’m going.
First stage.
A second step in the construction in his identity,
it is the confrontation with oneself.
It can only be lived in the experience of loneliness.
Solitude is not isolation.
Solitude is to be in dialogue with oneself.
What are my big dreams?
What are my passions?
My sources of enthusiasm?
What do I want to achieve on this Earth?
What do I have of unique to offer to the world?
But also, what are the injuries in my life?
And how can I convert them to be forces,
and that they bear fruit where I am?
Finally, we also need
of someone’s confirmation in who we are.
It will not come from a boyfriend, a girlfriend,
it will come from someone who is already well established in his adult life,
and who says to you, “You are a beautiful person.
Go ahead, get started. “
” Which program ! “, you will tell me.
It’s a wonderful program, it’s important to live.
There is a particular, privileged time to get to know each other,
then to know how to serve, how to better love the other.
It can be assumed that the time of adolescence is the ideal time.
So, if it’s the ideal time,
and if we wish in our society a happy mix,
and that we know that for this diversity to exist,
everyone must be able to build their identity,
what are we waiting for to put in schools
personal development workshops
where teenagers and children can get to know each other?
But also…
(Applause)
But also, when are we going to offer other experiences to young people
that get drunk and get a blowjob from their girlfriend
to become an adult.
We must propose strong experiences: world tours, trips, summits,
who build and who make it possible to get to know each other.
What experiences are proposed to achieve this?
And the third thing too,
when are we going to finally offer in schools,
from an early age philosophy classes
to make young people love truth and wisdom?
It is high time to put this in place if we want a happy mix.
(Applause)
The light comes on, and I see your head,
and you do not look exactly like teenagers,
and maybe some say to themselves:
” She’s cute. Why not, that’s right,
there may be some questions that I did not ask too much.
So how to do ? “
No stress.
Our company has invented a great thing,
whose name is –
before I tell you what it’s called, there’s a great thing, great,
it’s a catch-up session
for all those who would have dried up the program as a teenager.
It’s called the midlife crisis. (Laughter)
It’s the same with a blue card, as Foresti says.
Adolescence with a blue card, great, but I would add,
with three kids and a husband and more.
It’s a bit more complex to ask yourself these questions,
and we realize that it’s risky. That’s the case, but it’s worth it.
The main thing is not to be in a relationship for the couple,
but it’s learning to gain inner freedom
and to live that wisdom too.
We do not run away forever.
Take the risk of asking yourself these questions and building yourself.
You hear well in all that I say to you,
that this happy mix,
and all the speeches that have been advocated on feminism, equality,
it supposes first that the question of identity is constructed.
Otherwise, all these speeches sound hollow.
Another really important thing that I want to tell you tonight.
If I say it with conviction,
is that for quite a few years now
I live to my full vocation as a woman,
talk about love, sexuality, everywhere, I give a lot of lectures,
and each time, people ask me the same question:
“What about your husband? “
(Laughter)
I do not really know how to take it,
but I will answer you one thing.
Well, it’s not easy every day.
It’s not easy every day to face a woman
who tries to live this freedom and lives his vocation to the full.
And I have one thing that comes to mind after listening to you.
Freedom is beautiful, equality is good, we all agree,
but if it is not to love and to be loved, it is useless.
What we want deep inside us is love,
and this freedom, this equality must be at the service of our loves.
May we finally love and be loved.
And if at last, we took that time too with men,
because they have the same challenges,
to be able to build,
to be assumed in a beautiful virility in the good sense of the term:
the manhood to know who we are, to know where we are going,
to have confidence in oneself and to be assumed,
if we attacked men on these issues,
finally, they will perhaps stop trying to dominate us,
and they will finally sublimate us.
Thank you.
(Applause)
”
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