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Moving Questions | Christal Brown | TEDxMiddlebury


[Music]

[Music] [Applause]

but I guess he’ll be absurd thing is is

but I guess he’ll be absurd thing is is I never know what’s coming out or when

I never know what’s coming out or when

I never know what’s coming out or when it’s going to come out or what it’s

it’s going to come out or what it’s

it’s going to come out or what it’s about thing is if I did have that screen

about thing is if I did have that screen

about thing is if I did have that screen I may get fired if I did have that

I may get fired if I did have that

I may get fired if I did have that screen there’ll be things that you would

screen there’ll be things that you would

screen there’ll be things that you would know about me before I knew them about

know about me before I knew them about

know about me before I knew them about me we’re sum of all our parts questions

me we’re sum of all our parts questions

me we’re sum of all our parts questions come questions go information comes it

come questions go information comes it

come questions go information comes it goes every day you wake up there are

goes every day you wake up there are

goes every day you wake up there are sales that were a part of you the day

sales that were a part of you the day

sales that were a part of you the day before that are dead there are parts of

before that are dead there are parts of

before that are dead there are parts of you they have yet to begun you are never

you they have yet to begun you are never

you they have yet to begun you are never finished that’s what keeps me working I

finished that’s what keeps me working I

finished that’s what keeps me working I know that something about me has yet to

know that something about me has yet to

know that something about me has yet to come to fruition and although that may

come to fruition and although that may

come to fruition and although that may seem scary at least I know that I

seem scary at least I know that I

seem scary at least I know that I haven’t really messed it all up yet so I

haven’t really messed it all up yet so I

haven’t really messed it all up yet so I thought about curiosity thought about

thought about curiosity thought about

thought about curiosity thought about these questions we’re living in and

these questions we’re living in and

these questions we’re living in and we’re all living in them you’re living

we’re all living in them you’re living

we’re all living in them you’re living in them right now what am I going to say

in them right now what am I going to say

in them right now what am I going to say next we’re in these questions together

next we’re in these questions together

next we’re in these questions together and my goal as an artist is to engage in

and my goal as an artist is to engage in

and my goal as an artist is to engage in these dialogues with people so that we

these dialogues with people so that we

these dialogues with people so that we somehow get to the answers together this

somehow get to the answers together this

somehow get to the answers together this could mean anything to you that could be

could mean anything to you that could be

could mean anything to you that could be talking about sexuality

front I could be posing I could be doing

front I could be posing I could be doing anything why do I have on a white suit

anything why do I have on a white suit

anything why do I have on a white suit do I think I’m so pure what is this

do I think I’m so pure what is this

do I think I’m so pure what is this about what is the artistic choices that

about what is the artistic choices that

about what is the artistic choices that I make on a day-to-day basis come to

I make on a day-to-day basis come to

I make on a day-to-day basis come to bear on the opinions you have of my work

bear on the opinions you have of my work

bear on the opinions you have of my work and that becomes the question that I

and that becomes the question that I

and that becomes the question that I dwell in what are you seeing what are

dwell in what are you seeing what are

dwell in what are you seeing what are you hearing what am i communicating and

you hearing what am i communicating and

you hearing what am i communicating and for some people I’ve been doing a great

for some people I’ve been doing a great

for some people I’ve been doing a great job for other people like my mother who

job for other people like my mother who

job for other people like my mother who struggles to tell people what I do for a

struggles to tell people what I do for a

struggles to tell people what I do for a living maybe not so for me the question

living maybe not so for me the question

living maybe not so for me the question becomes what is it I want to convey

becomes what is it I want to convey

becomes what is it I want to convey whether you get it or not whether it

whether you get it or not whether it

whether you get it or not whether it becomes artistic enough or not whether

becomes artistic enough or not whether

becomes artistic enough or not whether people patronize it or not or whether

people patronize it or not or whether

people patronize it or not or whether it’s beautiful or not I often tell

it’s beautiful or not I often tell

it’s beautiful or not I often tell people when they say oh what do you do

people when they say oh what do you do

people when they say oh what do you do at the college I say I’m a dance

at the college I say I’m a dance

at the college I say I’m a dance professor and they go oh how fun they

professor and they go oh how fun they

professor and they go oh how fun they never say that to physicist

they never say that to biologists right

they never say that to biologists right why do they say that because we have

why do they say that because we have

why do they say that because we have somehow trivialize the body it’s

somehow trivialize the body it’s

somehow trivialize the body it’s something you dress up something you

something you dress up something you

something you dress up something you show off when you want to something you

show off when you want to something you

show off when you want to something you change if you’re financially able to

change if you’re financially able to

change if you’re financially able to there are things about this that contain

there are things about this that contain

there are things about this that contain history that contain culture that

history that contain culture that

history that contain culture that contain eons of legacies that I will

contain eons of legacies that I will

contain eons of legacies that I will never know unless I turn my gaze inward

never know unless I turn my gaze inward

never know unless I turn my gaze inward and to put that into academic terms i

and to put that into academic terms i

and to put that into academic terms i use my critical lens on myself the

use my critical lens on myself the

use my critical lens on myself the question becomes what am i holding on to

question becomes what am i holding on to

question becomes what am i holding on to and in moments of improvisation like

and in moments of improvisation like

and in moments of improvisation like you’ve just seen i have no idea what’s

you’ve just seen i have no idea what’s

you’ve just seen i have no idea what’s really in there i have no idea what’s

really in there i have no idea what’s

really in there i have no idea what’s coming next i have no idea what could be

coming next i have no idea what could be

coming next i have no idea what could be seething at the bottom of my

seething at the bottom of my

seething at the bottom of my consciousness what is able or asking to

consciousness what is able or asking to

consciousness what is able or asking to be revealed i created pieces now for the

be revealed i created pieces now for the

be revealed i created pieces now for the last 20 years i’m often in such a state

last 20 years i’m often in such a state

last 20 years i’m often in such a state of creation and questioning while i’m

of creation and questioning while i’m

of creation and questioning while i’m making those pieces that have no idea

making those pieces that have no idea

making those pieces that have no idea what they’re about I make them rapidly

what they’re about I make them rapidly

what they’re about I make them rapidly somehow people think that I’m prolific

somehow people think that I’m prolific

somehow people think that I’m prolific as an artist and it has nothing to do

as an artist and it has nothing to do

as an artist and it has nothing to do with me because I believe that the

with me because I believe that the

with me because I believe that the question really is where is it coming

question really is where is it coming

question really is where is it coming from and my process of unearthing where

from and my process of unearthing where

from and my process of unearthing where it’s coming from is to make sure that

it’s coming from is to make sure that

it’s coming from is to make sure that this thing that is conducting the

this thing that is conducting the

this thing that is conducting the material is as empty as possible there

material is as empty as possible there

material is as empty as possible there is something that can be done with an

is something that can be done with an

is something that can be done with an empty vessel that cannot be done with a

empty vessel that cannot be done with a

empty vessel that cannot be done with a full one right little Dallas quote there

full one right little Dallas quote there

full one right little Dallas quote there yeah so as an artist I’m constantly

yeah so as an artist I’m constantly

yeah so as an artist I’m constantly questioning am I empty enough or do I

questioning am I empty enough or do I

questioning am I empty enough or do I have room somewhere in here to take on

have room somewhere in here to take on

have room somewhere in here to take on more information and if I can take on

more information and if I can take on

more information and if I can take on more information how does it mix what’s

more information how does it mix what’s

more information how does it mix what’s the alchemy of what’s already happened

the alchemy of what’s already happened

the alchemy of what’s already happened to me ingested with

to me ingested with

to me ingested with taking into my perception right now and

taking into my perception right now and

taking into my perception right now and how do I become or how do i create a

how do I become or how do i create a

how do I become or how do i create a product that’s authentic from what I

product that’s authentic from what I

product that’s authentic from what I know I am right now which I will not be

know I am right now which I will not be

know I am right now which I will not be in the next moment which I have never

in the next moment which I have never

in the next moment which I have never been before we are all becoming

been before we are all becoming

been before we are all becoming something I’ve been working on a piece

something I’ve been working on a piece

something I’ve been working on a piece some that’s about Muhammad I leave for

some that’s about Muhammad I leave for

some that’s about Muhammad I leave for the last three years and he has a really

the last three years and he has a really

the last three years and he has a really wonderful quote that says I don’t always

wonderful quote that says I don’t always

wonderful quote that says I don’t always know what I’m talking about but I know

know what I’m talking about but I know

know what I’m talking about but I know that I’m right and that’s true that’s

that I’m right and that’s true that’s

that I’m right and that’s true that’s true for the languages that come out of

true for the languages that come out of

true for the languages that come out of my body I am NOT bilingual or trilingual

my body I am NOT bilingual or trilingual

my body I am NOT bilingual or trilingual in any traditional sense but there are

in any traditional sense but there are

in any traditional sense but there are so many things so many languages

so many things so many languages

so many things so many languages vernaculars that have gone into this

vernaculars that have gone into this

vernaculars that have gone into this body to create some kind of multiplicity

body to create some kind of multiplicity

body to create some kind of multiplicity of understanding that i speak volumes

of understanding that i speak volumes

of understanding that i speak volumes without saying anything and so do you

without saying anything and so do you

without saying anything and so do you the way you dress up this thing the

the way you dress up this thing the

the way you dress up this thing the costumes you choose the way that you

costumes you choose the way that you

costumes you choose the way that you assume the stage of life the steps you

assume the stage of life the steps you

assume the stage of life the steps you choreograph for yourself and the stages

choreograph for yourself and the stages

choreograph for yourself and the stages you find yourself on whether that be a

you find yourself on whether that be a

you find yourself on whether that be a classroom

classroom

classroom a first date an embarrassing moment your

a first date an embarrassing moment your

a first date an embarrassing moment your body speaks volumes about who you are

body speaks volumes about who you are

body speaks volumes about who you are where you’ve been and where you’re going

where you’ve been and where you’re going

where you’ve been and where you’re going so the next time you take a step out or

so the next time you take a step out or

so the next time you take a step out or into the next situation think about what

into the next situation think about what

into the next situation think about what questions lie ahead and be ready to

questions lie ahead and be ready to

questions lie ahead and be ready to answer them with anything you have at

answer them with anything you have at

answer them with anything you have at your disposal thanks

your disposal thanks

your disposal thanks [Applause]

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