Lost in the maze | Alex Kariuki | TEDxRidgeways

now I know you might all be wondering

now I know you might all be wondering what does a 12 year old boy know about

what does a 12 year old boy know about

what does a 12 year old boy know about the boy child crisis I present the boy

the boy child crisis I present the boy

the boy child crisis I present the boy child crisis in three different stories

child crisis in three different stories

child crisis in three different stories which are also my personal experiences

which are also my personal experiences

which are also my personal experiences first and foremost my thoughts about the

first and foremost my thoughts about the

first and foremost my thoughts about the boy child go three years back when our

boy child go three years back when our

boy child go three years back when our guidance and counseling teacher took all

guidance and counseling teacher took all

guidance and counseling teacher took all girls to a separate room us being young

girls to a separate room us being young

girls to a separate room us being young and nosey boys decided to eavesdrop on

and nosey boys decided to eavesdrop on

and nosey boys decided to eavesdrop on the conversation most of it held on how

the conversation most of it held on how

the conversation most of it held on how girls should not interact with boys

girls should not interact with boys

girls should not interact with boys inappropriately the other half was about

inappropriately the other half was about

inappropriately the other half was about adolescence and the like but as we

adolescence and the like but as we

adolescence and the like but as we headed back to class we first felt

headed back to class we first felt

headed back to class we first felt marginalized and left out and we started

marginalized and left out and we started

marginalized and left out and we started asking ourselves questions why didn’t

asking ourselves questions why didn’t

asking ourselves questions why didn’t the guidance and counseling teacher do

the guidance and counseling teacher do

the guidance and counseling teacher do the same thing for us boys don’t we go

the same thing for us boys don’t we go

the same thing for us boys don’t we go through these same physical and

through these same physical and

through these same physical and emotional changes we have to stop the

emotional changes we have to stop the

emotional changes we have to stop the assumption that the boy child knows the

assumption that the boy child knows the

assumption that the boy child knows the way globally there has been an over

way globally there has been an over

way globally there has been an over emphasis on girl child empowerment and

emphasis on girl child empowerment and

emphasis on girl child empowerment and this is rapidly suffocating the boy

this is rapidly suffocating the boy

this is rapidly suffocating the boy child because we are just as vulnerable

child because we are just as vulnerable

child because we are just as vulnerable as the girl child most of the time I

as the girl child most of the time I

as the girl child most of the time I hear my parents and grandparents discuss

hear my parents and grandparents discuss

hear my parents and grandparents discuss how boys in our rural community have

how boys in our rural community have

how boys in our rural community have become a social misfit I know you might

become a social misfit I know you might

become a social misfit I know you might all be wondering which community do I

all be wondering which community do I

all be wondering which community do I come from actually most of my ancestors

come from actually most of my ancestors

come from actually most of my ancestors happen to come from near County

happen to come from near County

happen to come from near County specifically or dire anyway moving on

specifically or dire anyway moving on

specifically or dire anyway moving on with my story apparently these boys are

with my story apparently these boys are

with my story apparently these boys are rarely sober and they spend the better

rarely sober and they spend the better

rarely sober and they spend the better part of their day drinking and hanging

part of their day drinking and hanging

part of their day drinking and hanging out their peers in shopping centers this

out their peers in shopping centers this

out their peers in shopping centers this behavior in the community seems to have

behavior in the community seems to have

behavior in the community seems to have trickled down from the fathers to their

trickled down from the fathers to their

trickled down from the fathers to their sons as such their mothers and wives

sons as such their mothers and wives

sons as such their mothers and wives have become the sole breadwinners of the

have become the sole breadwinners of the

have become the sole breadwinners of the family

I happen to have also come across a few

I happen to have also come across a few articles in our local daily that suggest

articles in our local daily that suggest

articles in our local daily that suggest a high percentage of men in the rural

a high percentage of men in the rural

a high percentage of men in the rural part of central Kenya are now alcoholics

part of central Kenya are now alcoholics

part of central Kenya are now alcoholics you see the girls see their hard-working

you see the girls see their hard-working

you see the girls see their hard-working mother’s going to the shamba every day

mother’s going to the shamba every day

mother’s going to the shamba every day therefore they know the only way to be

therefore they know the only way to be

therefore they know the only way to be successful is by working hard they’re

successful is by working hard they’re

successful is by working hard they’re hard working mothers are the girls role

hard working mothers are the girls role

hard working mothers are the girls role models on the other hand the boys see

models on the other hand the boys see

models on the other hand the boys see their fathers drunk and eating off the

their fathers drunk and eating off the

their fathers drunk and eating off the sweat of their mothers some emulate this

sweat of their mothers some emulate this

sweat of their mothers some emulate this from my young age because they have no

from my young age because they have no

from my young age because they have no milk we got meat on them this then poses

milk we got meat on them this then poses

milk we got meat on them this then poses the question who guides the boy child

the question who guides the boy child

the question who guides the boy child looking at the trend in most Kenyan

looking at the trend in most Kenyan

looking at the trend in most Kenyan homes today we see that our fathers are

homes today we see that our fathers are

homes today we see that our fathers are so engrossed in their work they leave

so engrossed in their work they leave

so engrossed in their work they leave the house quite early and come back very

the house quite early and come back very

the house quite early and come back very late and when they have some spare time

late and when they have some spare time

late and when they have some spare time during the weekend you will find them

during the weekend you will find them

during the weekend you will find them going out for social activities with

going out for social activities with

going out for social activities with their peers as such the upbringing of

their peers as such the upbringing of

their peers as such the upbringing of children has been left to moms and

children has been left to moms and

children has been left to moms and nannies this means that us boys develop

nannies this means that us boys develop

nannies this means that us boys develop a closer relationship with our moms

a closer relationship with our moms

a closer relationship with our moms because it is they who are there most of

because it is they who are there most of

because it is they who are there most of the time in my observation I see that us

the time in my observation I see that us

the time in my observation I see that us boys see our fathers as disciplinarians

boys see our fathers as disciplinarians

boys see our fathers as disciplinarians because they are more keen on instilling

because they are more keen on instilling

because they are more keen on instilling discipline rather than building up a

discipline rather than building up a

discipline rather than building up a closer relationship

closer relationship

closer relationship this means that society is left without

this means that society is left without

this means that society is left without a male figure to mentor them and this

a male figure to mentor them and this

a male figure to mentor them and this impacts us by having boys dropping out

impacts us by having boys dropping out

impacts us by having boys dropping out of school high rates of drug and alcohol

of school high rates of drug and alcohol

of school high rates of drug and alcohol abuse and sadly the high cases of young

abuse and sadly the high cases of young

abuse and sadly the high cases of young boys looking for older women to support

boys looking for older women to support

boys looking for older women to support them financially mine today was not to

them financially mine today was not to

them financially mine today was not to castigate or undermined the efforts put

castigate or undermined the efforts put

castigate or undermined the efforts put to impart the girl child no mine was a

to impart the girl child no mine was a

to impart the girl child no mine was a plea rather a cry for the boy child who

plea rather a cry for the boy child who

plea rather a cry for the boy child who seems forgotten

seems forgotten

seems forgotten as I conclude but before I do so

as I conclude but before I do so

as I conclude but before I do so remember what they say in chess there is

remember what they say in chess there is

remember what they say in chess there is no question without an answer

no question without an answer

no question without an answer I challenge governmental organizations

I challenge governmental organizations

I challenge governmental organizations nongovernmental organizations because if

nongovernmental organizations because if

nongovernmental organizations because if one um of the society does not work the

one um of the society does not work the

one um of the society does not work the society at large cannot function thank

society at large cannot function thank

society at large cannot function thank you