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Kindness and the Aetheist Case for Karma | Christopher Willard | TEDxYouth@GDRHS


well thank you all very much for being

well thank you all very much for being here so I’m a guy who’s interested in

here so I’m a guy who’s interested in

here so I’m a guy who’s interested in science

science

science interested in creativity but as the

interested in creativity but as the

interested in creativity but as the Science Guy thing’s actually brought me

Science Guy thing’s actually brought me

Science Guy thing’s actually brought me to meditation which is really

to meditation which is really

to meditation which is really interesting to me but not to some of the

interesting to me but not to some of the

interesting to me but not to some of the you know kind of someone in traffic

you know kind of someone in traffic

you know kind of someone in traffic means you’ll never get a good parking

means you’ll never get a good parking

means you’ll never get a good parking spot

spot

spot it’s more kind of complicated than that

it’s more kind of complicated than that

it’s more kind of complicated than that and that made sense to me but as I kind

and that made sense to me but as I kind

and that made sense to me but as I kind of studied neuroscience a little bit

of studied neuroscience a little bit

of studied neuroscience a little bit more and studied things like social

more and studied things like social

more and studied things like social science as a psychologist actually came

science as a psychologist actually came

science as a psychologist actually came to disagree at least that part about

to disagree at least that part about

to disagree at least that part about kind of how we drive affecting whether

kind of how we drive affecting whether

kind of how we drive affecting whether we get a good parking spot so I’ll

we get a good parking spot so I’ll

we get a good parking spot so I’ll explain to you how this kind of works

explain to you how this kind of works

explain to you how this kind of works now we’ve probably all had that

now we’ve probably all had that

now we’ve probably all had that experience where we’re driving in rush

experience where we’re driving in rush

experience where we’re driving in rush hour traffic and you know we’re kind of

hour traffic and you know we’re kind of

hour traffic and you know we’re kind of going so slowly and then we see someone

going so slowly and then we see someone

going so slowly and then we see someone kind of in the distance just trying to

kind of in the distance just trying to

kind of in the distance just trying to cut us off right that you know we can

cut us off right that you know we can

cut us off right that you know we can think of a creative adjective for how

think of a creative adjective for how

think of a creative adjective for how you might describe them right but we

you might describe them right but we

you might describe them right but we have a dilemma in that moment right do

have a dilemma in that moment right do

have a dilemma in that moment right do we listen to the kinder angel on our

we listen to the kinder angel on our

we listen to the kinder angel on our shoulder and wave them in order listen

shoulder and wave them in order listen

shoulder and wave them in order listen to that devil on our shoulder and just

to that devil on our shoulder and just

to that devil on our shoulder and just like do the thousand-yard stare like I’m

like do the thousand-yard stare like I’m

like do the thousand-yard stare like I’m never going to let them in person

never going to let them in person

never going to let them in person doesn’t exist right and so before I kind

doesn’t exist right and so before I kind

doesn’t exist right and so before I kind of get into what the parking gods or

of get into what the parking gods or

of get into what the parking gods or karma or whoever decides what happens

karma or whoever decides what happens

karma or whoever decides what happens whether we let them in or not let’s look

whether we let them in or not let’s look

whether we let them in or not let’s look at like why we might let them in or not

at like why we might let them in or not

at like why we might let them in or not let them in now we know about human

let them in now we know about human

let them in now we know about human behavior that it’s based on two things

behavior that it’s based on two things

behavior that it’s based on two things right nature and nurture biology and

right nature and nurture biology and

right nature and nurture biology and like our social experiences and the kind

like our social experiences and the kind

like our social experiences and the kind of events that happen in our lives

of events that happen in our lives

of events that happen in our lives nature is like our DNA and our biology

nature is like our DNA and our biology

nature is like our DNA and our biology and you know other things you see up on

and you know other things you see up on

and you know other things you see up on this list here nurture is like our

this list here nurture is like our

this list here nurture is like our childhood experiences our parents the

childhood experiences our parents the

childhood experiences our parents the friendships that we have like they say

friendships that we have like they say

friendships that we have like they say are the average of the five people you

are the average of the five people you

are the average of the five people you spend the most time with right these

spend the most time with right these

spend the most time with right these kinds of things influence us and even

kinds of things influence us and even

kinds of things influence us and even our driver’s ed teacher to some extent

our driver’s ed teacher to some extent

our driver’s ed teacher to some extent so we start out with this blueprint of

so we start out with this blueprint of

so we start out with this blueprint of DNA and then

DNA and then

DNA and then kind of combines with with our nurture

kind of combines with with our nurture

kind of combines with with our nurture experiences that we have but where does

experiences that we have but where does

experiences that we have but where does that kind of DNA even come from in the

that kind of DNA even come from in the

that kind of DNA even come from in the first place and one thing that’s

first place and one thing that’s

first place and one thing that’s interesting is that kind of over the

interesting is that kind of over the

interesting is that kind of over the last few years there’s a new aspect of

last few years there’s a new aspect of

last few years there’s a new aspect of genetic science that’s actually

genetic science that’s actually

genetic science that’s actually overturned decades of understanding and

overturned decades of understanding and

overturned decades of understanding and this is called epigenetics and it’s

this is called epigenetics and it’s

this is called epigenetics and it’s actually how our nurture experiences

actually how our nurture experiences

actually how our nurture experiences actually affect our nature they affect

actually affect our nature they affect

actually affect our nature they affect our DNA so these scientists basically

our DNA so these scientists basically

our DNA so these scientists basically what they did was they found some

what they did was they found some

what they did was they found some genetically identical mice and they

genetically identical mice and they

genetically identical mice and they basically just like stressed out half of

basically just like stressed out half of

basically just like stressed out half of them right and what they found compared

them right and what they found compared

them right and what they found compared to their genetically identical brothers

to their genetically identical brothers

to their genetically identical brothers and sisters was that a few months later

and sisters was that a few months later

and sisters was that a few months later those mice were acting differently no

those mice were acting differently no

those mice were acting differently no big surprise because they were stressed

big surprise because they were stressed

big surprise because they were stressed out but they they did a blood test and

out but they they did a blood test and

out but they they did a blood test and they found that their genes had actually

they found that their genes had actually

they found that their genes had actually kind of turned on and off in certain

kind of turned on and off in certain

kind of turned on and off in certain ways that were different than the mice

ways that were different than the mice

ways that were different than the mice that had the low stress life of like you

that had the low stress life of like you

that had the low stress life of like you know hamster wheel workouts and sleeping

know hamster wheel workouts and sleeping

know hamster wheel workouts and sleeping in sawdust and all that kind of stuff

in sawdust and all that kind of stuff

in sawdust and all that kind of stuff and what they found that was even more

and what they found that was even more

and what they found that was even more interesting was that those mice that

interesting was that those mice that

interesting was that those mice that experienced the stress these kind of

experienced the stress these kind of

experienced the stress these kind of genetic changes that they saw they saw

genetic changes that they saw they saw

genetic changes that they saw they saw them in those mice as children and in

them in those mice as children and in

them in those mice as children and in their grandchildren as well so that some

their grandchildren as well so that some

their grandchildren as well so that some of the genetic information that was

of the genetic information that was

of the genetic information that was being passed down was actually starting

being passed down was actually starting

being passed down was actually starting to change just based on their experience

to change just based on their experience

to change just based on their experience so what does this mean for us well for a

so what does this mean for us well for a

so what does this mean for us well for a lot of us if we look at our family tree

lot of us if we look at our family tree

lot of us if we look at our family tree maybe we’ve had our grandparents or our

maybe we’ve had our grandparents or our

maybe we’ve had our grandparents or our ancestors have had some traumatic

ancestors have had some traumatic

ancestors have had some traumatic experiences right War slavery genocide

experiences right War slavery genocide

experiences right War slavery genocide poverty all of these things may have

poverty all of these things may have

poverty all of these things may have affected the way your grandparents

affected the way your grandparents

affected the way your grandparents Gene’s started to express themselves and

Gene’s started to express themselves and

Gene’s started to express themselves and that actually affects the DNA that

that actually affects the DNA that

that actually affects the DNA that you’re walking around with today in

you’re walking around with today in

you’re walking around with today in terms of what’s kind of turned on and

terms of what’s kind of turned on and

terms of what’s kind of turned on and off in that DNA and so we kind of think

off in that DNA and so we kind of think

off in that DNA and so we kind of think about we have this genetic setup and

about we have this genetic setup and

about we have this genetic setup and then we think about our experiences on

then we think about our experiences on

then we think about our experiences on that day that we drive home in rush hour

that day that we drive home in rush hour

that day that we drive home in rush hour traffic and you know maybe we had a bad

traffic and you know maybe we had a bad

traffic and you know maybe we had a bad night’s sleep and we ate some junk food

night’s sleep and we ate some junk food

night’s sleep and we ate some junk food or nothing at all we got in a fight with

or nothing at all we got in a fight with

or nothing at all we got in a fight with our best friend or our partner or

our best friend or our partner or

our best friend or our partner or something like that and we’re in a bad

something like that and we’re in a bad

something like that and we’re in a bad mood and we get into traffic and we’re

mood and we get into traffic and we’re

mood and we get into traffic and we’re kind of in that fight-or-flight mode

kind of in that fight-or-flight mode

kind of in that fight-or-flight mode because the world doesn’t seem like a

because the world doesn’t seem like a

because the world doesn’t seem like a safe place

safe place

safe place you know it’s kill or be killed it’s cut

you know it’s kill or be killed it’s cut

you know it’s kill or be killed it’s cut off in traffic or cut that person off in

off in traffic or cut that person off in

off in traffic or cut that person off in traffic and we decide to cut them off

traffic and we decide to cut them off

traffic and we decide to cut them off and a few things actually happen when we

and a few things actually happen when we

and a few things actually happen when we do that we actually rewire our brain we

do that we actually rewire our brain we

do that we actually rewire our brain we know that actually forming a habit

know that actually forming a habit

know that actually forming a habit we do something today we do it tomorrow

we do something today we do it tomorrow

we do something today we do it tomorrow in our brain we do something today it

in our brain we do something today it

in our brain we do something today it creates a neural pathway and we’re more

creates a neural pathway and we’re more

creates a neural pathway and we’re more likely to do that tomorrow and a few

likely to do that tomorrow and a few

likely to do that tomorrow and a few things also happen in different parts of

things also happen in different parts of

things also happen in different parts of our brain so when we’re stressed

our brain so when we’re stressed

our brain so when we’re stressed cortisol is the stress hormone that

cortisol is the stress hormone that

cortisol is the stress hormone that blocks our ability to feel kind of

blocks our ability to feel kind of

blocks our ability to feel kind of compassionate with oxytocin the love

compassionate with oxytocin the love

compassionate with oxytocin the love hormone the limbic system which is where

hormone the limbic system which is where

hormone the limbic system which is where we feel strong emotions that shuts down

we feel strong emotions that shuts down

we feel strong emotions that shuts down our ability to think clearly and take

our ability to think clearly and take

our ability to think clearly and take perspective on this situation and then

perspective on this situation and then

perspective on this situation and then we cut that person off and then we’re

we cut that person off and then we’re

we cut that person off and then we’re kind of a nasty person people that gets

kind of a nasty person people that gets

kind of a nasty person people that gets reinforced people don’t like us so much

reinforced people don’t like us so much

reinforced people don’t like us so much we keep seeing the world as a dangerous

we keep seeing the world as a dangerous

we keep seeing the world as a dangerous place where we should only fight and

place where we should only fight and

place where we should only fight and flee from situations and that gets

flee from situations and that gets

flee from situations and that gets reinforced day by day as well and so we

reinforced day by day as well and so we

reinforced day by day as well and so we go ahead and we just cut that person off

go ahead and we just cut that person off

go ahead and we just cut that person off in traffic and then kind of what happens

in traffic and then kind of what happens

in traffic and then kind of what happens over time is the neurons that fire

over time is the neurons that fire

over time is the neurons that fire together wire together with

together wire together with

together wire together with neuroplasticity and then even in terms

neuroplasticity and then even in terms

neuroplasticity and then even in terms of our genes they start to change I’ve

of our genes they start to change I’ve

of our genes they start to change I’ve got this quote up here it says if you

got this quote up here it says if you

got this quote up here it says if you think of the stress system as preparing

think of the stress system as preparing

think of the stress system as preparing you for fight or flight you might

you for fight or flight you might

you for fight or flight you might imagine these epigenetic changes prepare

imagine these epigenetic changes prepare

imagine these epigenetic changes prepare you to fight harder and flee faster the

you to fight harder and flee faster the

you to fight harder and flee faster the next time you encounter something

next time you encounter something

next time you encounter something stressful like rush-hour traffic

stressful like rush-hour traffic

stressful like rush-hour traffic alright changing our change in this way

alright changing our change in this way

alright changing our change in this way and this thing is that it doesn’t

and this thing is that it doesn’t

and this thing is that it doesn’t actually stop with us it actually starts

actually stop with us it actually starts

actually stop with us it actually starts to trickle outward so that how I act

to trickle outward so that how I act

to trickle outward so that how I act affects other people it doesn’t just

affects other people it doesn’t just

affects other people it doesn’t just affect me and how I feel but I cut that

affect me and how I feel but I cut that

affect me and how I feel but I cut that person off in traffic they’re actually

person off in traffic they’re actually

person off in traffic they’re actually more likely to then go home and snap at

more likely to then go home and snap at

more likely to then go home and snap at their kids send them up to bed without

their kids send them up to bed without

their kids send them up to bed without any dessert and then those kids start to

any dessert and then those kids start to

any dessert and then those kids start to do something different they kick the dog

do something different they kick the dog

do something different they kick the dog on the way up the stairs they go to bed

on the way up the stairs they go to bed

on the way up the stairs they go to bed unhappy they wake up unhappy their gene

unhappy they wake up unhappy their gene

unhappy they wake up unhappy their gene expression starts to change itself so

expression starts to change itself so

expression starts to change itself so that those genetic materials get passed

that those genetic materials get passed

that those genetic materials get passed on to their kids and their grandkids

on to their kids and their grandkids

on to their kids and their grandkids that say you should fight and flee from

that say you should fight and flee from

that say you should fight and flee from all these just mildly stressful

all these just mildly stressful

all these just mildly stressful situations like rush hour traffic but

situations like rush hour traffic but

situations like rush hour traffic but let’s pause there and think about what

let’s pause there and think about what

let’s pause there and think about what happens when we do decide to listen to

happens when we do decide to listen to

happens when we do decide to listen to the kinder angels of our nature and just

the kinder angels of our nature and just

the kinder angels of our nature and just let that person go in traffic what

let that person go in traffic what

let that person go in traffic what happens and why and so again there’s

happens and why and so again there’s

happens and why and so again there’s some of that nature there’s some of that

some of that nature there’s some of that

some of that nature there’s some of that nurture that’s part of it right maybe

nurture that’s part of it right maybe

nurture that’s part of it right maybe even in our family tree our grandparents

even in our family tree our grandparents

even in our family tree our grandparents did experience some difficult things but

did experience some difficult things but

did experience some difficult things but maybe they went to therapy or they got

maybe they went to therapy or they got

maybe they went to therapy or they got help or they you know work

help or they you know work

help or they you know work their issues and their genetic material

their issues and their genetic material

their issues and their genetic material didn’t actually change to kind of send

didn’t actually change to kind of send

didn’t actually change to kind of send these messages on down to your parents

these messages on down to your parents

these messages on down to your parents and on to you eventually and maybe even

and on to you eventually and maybe even

and on to you eventually and maybe even they did or they didn’t but maybe you

they did or they didn’t but maybe you

they did or they didn’t but maybe you had a pretty good day right you got a

had a pretty good day right you got a

had a pretty good day right you got a good night’s sleep you ate a healthy

good night’s sleep you ate a healthy

good night’s sleep you ate a healthy meal that day you laughed with your

meal that day you laughed with your

meal that day you laughed with your friends the Sun was shining you weren’t

friends the Sun was shining you weren’t

friends the Sun was shining you weren’t in a rush you’re in a good mood the

in a rush you’re in a good mood the

in a rush you’re in a good mood the world seems like a safe place and

world seems like a safe place and

world seems like a safe place and letting someone go in traffic doesn’t

letting someone go in traffic doesn’t

letting someone go in traffic doesn’t seem like a big deal right so you go

seem like a big deal right so you go

seem like a big deal right so you go ahead and you’re able to let them in

ahead and you’re able to let them in

ahead and you’re able to let them in because you’re not in fight or flight

because you’re not in fight or flight

because you’re not in fight or flight you’re in that kind of mode where you’re

you’re in that kind of mode where you’re

you’re in that kind of mode where you’re able to kind of think use your whole

able to kind of think use your whole

able to kind of think use your whole brain see the whole big picture and

brain see the whole big picture and

brain see the whole big picture and think oh maybe they’re just rushing

think oh maybe they’re just rushing

think oh maybe they’re just rushing their sick kid to the hospital today

their sick kid to the hospital today

their sick kid to the hospital today right and then your your your brains

right and then your your your brains

right and then your your your brains actually also you’re kind of able to be

actually also you’re kind of able to be

actually also you’re kind of able to be compassionate with the oxytocin flowing

compassionate with the oxytocin flowing

compassionate with the oxytocin flowing and you think I’m going to do something

and you think I’m going to do something

and you think I’m going to do something kind because that feels good and you go

kind because that feels good and you go

kind because that feels good and you go ahead and you wave them in and we know

ahead and you wave them in and we know

ahead and you wave them in and we know when we do nice things right people tend

when we do nice things right people tend

when we do nice things right people tend to like us so that gets reinforced again

to like us so that gets reinforced again

to like us so that gets reinforced again and again and so I keep doing nice

and again and so I keep doing nice

and again and so I keep doing nice things it becomes a habit to do those

things it becomes a habit to do those

things it becomes a habit to do those nice things when I waive them in in

nice things when I waive them in in

nice things when I waive them in in traffic like the you know nice guy that

traffic like the you know nice guy that

traffic like the you know nice guy that I am or whatever and then that changes

I am or whatever and then that changes

I am or whatever and then that changes my brain so I have the habit of doing

my brain so I have the habit of doing

my brain so I have the habit of doing nice things and driving like a nice guy

nice things and driving like a nice guy

nice things and driving like a nice guy every day in traffic and they also have

every day in traffic and they also have

every day in traffic and they also have a few hits of some different

a few hits of some different

a few hits of some different neurotransmitters so I get serotonin

neurotransmitters so I get serotonin

neurotransmitters so I get serotonin which regulates mood and anxiety I get a

which regulates mood and anxiety I get a

which regulates mood and anxiety I get a hit of oxytocin which makes me feel kind

hit of oxytocin which makes me feel kind

hit of oxytocin which makes me feel kind of all warm and fuzzy for the next few

of all warm and fuzzy for the next few

of all warm and fuzzy for the next few hours and I get dopamine which is a

hours and I get dopamine which is a

hours and I get dopamine which is a reward transmitter that actually makes

reward transmitter that actually makes

reward transmitter that actually makes me feel good and positive as well and

me feel good and positive as well and

me feel good and positive as well and when we do good we feel good because

when we do good we feel good because

when we do good we feel good because we’re actually strengthening the parts

we’re actually strengthening the parts

we’re actually strengthening the parts of our brain that are associated with

of our brain that are associated with

of our brain that are associated with with connection and Trust with other

with connection and Trust with other

with connection and Trust with other people and then my genes don’t change to

people and then my genes don’t change to

people and then my genes don’t change to kind of send that genetic material

kind of send that genetic material

kind of send that genetic material onward either but also this same social

onward either but also this same social

onward either but also this same social contagion thing happens so these

contagion thing happens so these

contagion thing happens so these researchers James Fowler and Nick

researchers James Fowler and Nick

researchers James Fowler and Nick Christie aqus they’re at Emory and at

Christie aqus they’re at Emory and at

Christie aqus they’re at Emory and at Yale and they’ve studied social

Yale and they’ve studied social

Yale and they’ve studied social contagions and they found that even just

contagions and they found that even just

contagions and they found that even just witnessing one act of generosity

witnessing one act of generosity

witnessing one act of generosity actually leads to people kind of being

actually leads to people kind of being

actually leads to people kind of being kinder three degrees of separation away

kinder three degrees of separation away

kinder three degrees of separation away so I go ahead and I wave that person in

so I go ahead and I wave that person in

so I go ahead and I wave that person in in traffic and they maybe you know make

in traffic and they maybe you know make

in traffic and they maybe you know make extra cookies for the kids before bed

extra cookies for the kids before bed

extra cookies for the kids before bed the kids go to bed happy they scratch

the kids go to bed happy they scratch

the kids go to bed happy they scratch the dogs tummy on the way

the dogs tummy on the way

the dogs tummy on the way upstairs the kids wake up happy they

upstairs the kids wake up happy they

upstairs the kids wake up happy they wake up happier and more resilient they

wake up happier and more resilient they

wake up happier and more resilient they grow up more resilient they pass new

grow up more resilient they pass new

grow up more resilient they pass new more resilient genetic material on to

more resilient genetic material on to

more resilient genetic material on to their kids and their grandkids going

their kids and their grandkids going

their kids and their grandkids going forward right and so one of the things

forward right and so one of the things

forward right and so one of the things that’s amazing about generosity and

that’s amazing about generosity and

that’s amazing about generosity and kindness is that the research is finding

kindness is that the research is finding

kindness is that the research is finding and we all know that it feels good when

and we all know that it feels good when

and we all know that it feels good when we get something right but the research

we get something right but the research

we get something right but the research is finding that we actually feel better

is finding that we actually feel better

is finding that we actually feel better when we give something away so there’s a

when we give something away so there’s a

when we give something away so there’s a study that that basically gave people a

study that that basically gave people a

study that that basically gave people a $5 bill and they said you can either

$5 bill and they said you can either

$5 bill and they said you can either keep this or you can give it away now

keep this or you can give it away now

keep this or you can give it away now what happened that surprised the

what happened that surprised the

what happened that surprised the researchers as well as the kind of

researchers as well as the kind of

researchers as well as the kind of subjects in the research study was the

subjects in the research study was the

subjects in the research study was the people that gave away the $5 bill there

people that gave away the $5 bill there

people that gave away the $5 bill there you go give it away if you like or keep

you go give it away if you like or keep

you go give it away if you like or keep it but they felt better than the people

it but they felt better than the people

it but they felt better than the people who kept it so there’s a guy named

who kept it so there’s a guy named

who kept it so there’s a guy named Richie Davidson who studies this stuff

Richie Davidson who studies this stuff

Richie Davidson who studies this stuff and what he says is that the best way to

and what he says is that the best way to

and what he says is that the best way to activate positive emotion circuits in

activate positive emotion circuits in

activate positive emotion circuits in the brain is through acts of generosity

the brain is through acts of generosity

the brain is through acts of generosity and so what we know is when we kind in

and so what we know is when we kind in

and so what we know is when we kind in traffic or whatever situation I’m

traffic or whatever situation I’m

traffic or whatever situation I’m happier more optimistic the people

happier more optimistic the people

happier more optimistic the people around me are happier my kids even my

around me are happier my kids even my

around me are happier my kids even my grandkids are happier wired for more

grandkids are happier wired for more

grandkids are happier wired for more resilience kind of going forward into

resilience kind of going forward into

resilience kind of going forward into the generations right okay Chris this is

the generations right okay Chris this is

the generations right okay Chris this is all interesting but where’s my parking

all interesting but where’s my parking

all interesting but where’s my parking spot okay I’m getting there I’ve got one

spot okay I’m getting there I’ve got one

spot okay I’m getting there I’ve got one last study that I want to share with you

last study that I want to share with you

last study that I want to share with you that I find really interesting it’s by a

that I find really interesting it’s by a

that I find really interesting it’s by a guy with the greatest name for a

guy with the greatest name for a

guy with the greatest name for a scientist ever his name is Richard

scientist ever his name is Richard

scientist ever his name is Richard Wiseman okay so he did this study where

Wiseman okay so he did this study where

Wiseman okay so he did this study where he wanted to kind of see how optimists

he wanted to kind of see how optimists

he wanted to kind of see how optimists and pessimists happy people and unhappy

and pessimists happy people and unhappy

and pessimists happy people and unhappy people perceived the world in different

people perceived the world in different

people perceived the world in different ways what kinds of things they see so he

ways what kinds of things they see so he

ways what kinds of things they see so he gave them all on newspaper and he said I

gave them all on newspaper and he said I

gave them all on newspaper and he said I want you to count the number of

want you to count the number of

want you to count the number of photographs in the newspaper now what

photographs in the newspaper now what

photographs in the newspaper now what happened the optimists finished the job

happened the optimists finished the job

happened the optimists finished the job in just a few seconds the pessimists

in just a few seconds the pessimists

in just a few seconds the pessimists they took actually a few minutes they

they took actually a few minutes they

they took actually a few minutes they took much longer but he did a little bit

took much longer but he did a little bit

took much longer but he did a little bit of a trick when he did this experiment

of a trick when he did this experiment

of a trick when he did this experiment which was in the second page of the

which was in the second page of the

which was in the second page of the newspaper there was an ad that said stop

newspaper there was an ad that said stop

newspaper there was an ad that said stop counting there are 43 photographs in the

counting there are 43 photographs in the

counting there are 43 photographs in the newspaper

newspaper

newspaper now the optimists were able to tune into

now the optimists were able to tune into

now the optimists were able to tune into this kind of creative opportunity right

this kind of creative opportunity right

this kind of creative opportunity right in front of them but the pessimists just

in front of them but the pessimists just

in front of them but the pessimists just looked right past it they both had the

looked right past it they both had the

looked right past it they both had the same

same

same opportunity right there but it was only

opportunity right there but it was only

opportunity right there but it was only the people that were happy and

the people that were happy and

the people that were happy and optimistic that we’re really able to

optimistic that we’re really able to

optimistic that we’re really able to kind of tune into these different

kind of tune into these different

kind of tune into these different chances that were right there in front

chances that were right there in front

chances that were right there in front of everybody we’re the pessimists just

of everybody we’re the pessimists just

of everybody we’re the pessimists just kind of tuned it back out so what does

kind of tuned it back out so what does

kind of tuned it back out so what does this mean to me well to me it means that

this mean to me well to me it means that

this mean to me well to me it means that maybe my meditation teacher and my

maybe my meditation teacher and my

maybe my meditation teacher and my driver’s ed teacher were kind of on the

driver’s ed teacher were kind of on the

driver’s ed teacher were kind of on the same page and maybe they should have

same page and maybe they should have

same page and maybe they should have taught me you know that like when the

taught me you know that like when the

taught me you know that like when the driver is ready the parking spot appears

driver is ready the parking spot appears

driver is ready the parking spot appears or something you know kind of wise and

or something you know kind of wise and

or something you know kind of wise and sage like that because when we’re

sage like that because when we’re

sage like that because when we’re feeling happy and optimistic and that

feeling happy and optimistic and that

feeling happy and optimistic and that parking spot opens up were able to see

parking spot opens up were able to see

parking spot opens up were able to see it when we’re in that kind of good mood

it when we’re in that kind of good mood

it when we’re in that kind of good mood from how we’ve acted before in traffic

from how we’ve acted before in traffic

from how we’ve acted before in traffic on that day so here’s what I encourage

on that day so here’s what I encourage

on that day so here’s what I encourage you to do I encourage you to take a page

you to do I encourage you to take a page

you to do I encourage you to take a page from the PlayBook of my good friend

from the PlayBook of my good friend

from the PlayBook of my good friend Shireen now Shireen sounds like a person

Shireen now Shireen sounds like a person

Shireen now Shireen sounds like a person I’m making up but I swear to god she’s

I’m making up but I swear to god she’s

I’m making up but I swear to god she’s real I just happened to change her name

real I just happened to change her name

real I just happened to change her name Shireen grew up in Pakistan Muslim she

Shireen grew up in Pakistan Muslim she

Shireen grew up in Pakistan Muslim she went to Catholic school she’s now an

went to Catholic school she’s now an

went to Catholic school she’s now an atheist she’s actually in 12-step

atheist she’s actually in 12-step

atheist she’s actually in 12-step recovery from alcoholism and she

recovery from alcoholism and she

recovery from alcoholism and she practices Buddhist meditation she kind

practices Buddhist meditation she kind

practices Buddhist meditation she kind of believes in everything and she kind

of believes in everything and she kind

of believes in everything and she kind of believes in nothing but what she does

of believes in nothing but what she does

of believes in nothing but what she does believe in and she inspired this talk

believe in and she inspired this talk

believe in and she inspired this talk actually is acts of kindness and what

actually is acts of kindness and what

actually is acts of kindness and what she does her act of kindness is actually

she does her act of kindness is actually

she does her act of kindness is actually just everyday she lets one person go in

just everyday she lets one person go in

just everyday she lets one person go in front of her in traffic now around where

front of her in traffic now around where

front of her in traffic now around where we live whatever you believe that

we live whatever you believe that

we live whatever you believe that probably khalaf eyes for like sainthood

probably khalaf eyes for like sainthood

probably khalaf eyes for like sainthood or some kind of incredible afterlife or

or some kind of incredible afterlife or

or some kind of incredible afterlife or heavenly realm or rebirth or something

heavenly realm or rebirth or something

heavenly realm or rebirth or something like that right but what we do know at

like that right but what we do know at

like that right but what we do know at least from the science is what that

least from the science is what that

least from the science is what that definitely qualifies her for is more

definitely qualifies her for is more

definitely qualifies her for is more happiness more resilience more happiness

happiness more resilience more happiness

happiness more resilience more happiness for herself her family maybe even some

for herself her family maybe even some

for herself her family maybe even some stranger’s too right more resilience for

stranger’s too right more resilience for

stranger’s too right more resilience for her kids going forward and maybe better

her kids going forward and maybe better

her kids going forward and maybe better odds of a good parking spot so what I

odds of a good parking spot so what I

odds of a good parking spot so what I encourage you to do as well going

encourage you to do as well going

encourage you to do as well going forward if you want more happiness

forward if you want more happiness

forward if you want more happiness optimism resilience and creativity in

optimism resilience and creativity in

optimism resilience and creativity in your life is to consider just one act of

your life is to consider just one act of

your life is to consider just one act of kindness a day whatever you want that to

kindness a day whatever you want that to

kindness a day whatever you want that to be and in that way you’ll make yourself

be and in that way you’ll make yourself

be and in that way you’ll make yourself happier more optimistic and resilient

happier more optimistic and resilient

happier more optimistic and resilient your friends some strangers your own

your friends some strangers your own

your friends some strangers your own kids and grandchildren and so on and so

kids and grandchildren and so on and so

kids and grandchildren and so on and so on and maybe even changing the course of

on and maybe even changing the course of

on and maybe even changing the course of human evolution toward greater kindness

human evolution toward greater kindness

human evolution toward greater kindness greater generosity and greater

greater generosity and greater

greater generosity and greater compassion going forward thank you so

compassion going forward thank you so

compassion going forward thank you so much

”

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