I’m Julia Montano and I am the only child of two protective well-intentioned
child of two protective well-intentioned
child of two protective well-intentioned parents so when the house is boarded up
parents so when the house is boarded up
parents so when the house is boarded up for the summer it’s almost impossible to
for the summer it’s almost impossible to
for the summer it’s almost impossible to go hang out with friends so you have to
go hang out with friends so you have to
go hang out with friends so you have to make new ones next slide
make new ones next slide
make new ones next slide these friends to be exact the 90s sitcom
these friends to be exact the 90s sitcom
these friends to be exact the 90s sitcom friends is not only the greatest Netflix
friends is not only the greatest Netflix
friends is not only the greatest Netflix binge ever but it’s also a staple to pop
binge ever but it’s also a staple to pop
binge ever but it’s also a staple to pop culture for even kids my age despite
culture for even kids my age despite
culture for even kids my age despite that some of us weren’t even mentally
that some of us weren’t even mentally
that some of us weren’t even mentally capable of comprehending the adult
capable of comprehending the adult
capable of comprehending the adult comedy when the last episode aired in
comedy when the last episode aired in
comedy when the last episode aired in 2004 the TV treasure is subject to
2004 the TV treasure is subject to
2004 the TV treasure is subject to millions upon millions of those annoying
millions upon millions of those annoying
millions upon millions of those annoying pandering quizzes that you find on
pandering quizzes that you find on
pandering quizzes that you find on social media hit next six times please I
don’t think we need 74 million results
don’t think we need 74 million results for you to determine whether or not you
for you to determine whether or not you
for you to determine whether or not you like meatball subs just as much as Joey
like meatball subs just as much as Joey
like meatball subs just as much as Joey Tribbiani with that said I’ll spare you
Tribbiani with that said I’ll spare you
Tribbiani with that said I’ll spare you the personality enquiries but I want you
the personality enquiries but I want you
the personality enquiries but I want you to determine for yourself which friend
to determine for yourself which friend
to determine for yourself which friend are you you may be unfamiliar with the
are you you may be unfamiliar with the
are you you may be unfamiliar with the show itself but with the given
show itself but with the given
show itself but with the given attributes you may find them resonating
attributes you may find them resonating
attributes you may find them resonating within yourself or your own social
within yourself or your own social
within yourself or your own social groups next slide please
groups next slide please
groups next slide please next slide meatball subs amazing so
next slide meatball subs amazing so
next slide meatball subs amazing so let’s start off with Monica Monica is
let’s start off with Monica Monica is
let’s start off with Monica Monica is the bossy uptight mom friend though she
the bossy uptight mom friend though she
the bossy uptight mom friend though she is the most accountable and she’s always
is the most accountable and she’s always
is the most accountable and she’s always there to extinguish all of your fires
there to extinguish all of your fires
there to extinguish all of your fires Rachel on the other hand is your typical
Rachel on the other hand is your typical
Rachel on the other hand is your typical girl next door she’s presumed to be a
girl next door she’s presumed to be a
girl next door she’s presumed to be a trophy wife but will prove you wrong at
trophy wife but will prove you wrong at
trophy wife but will prove you wrong at the end of the day with her
the end of the day with her
the end of the day with her determination boldness and confidence
determination boldness and confidence
determination boldness and confidence Phoebe is way on the other end of the
Phoebe is way on the other end of the
Phoebe is way on the other end of the spectrum
spectrum
spectrum she is the charismatic loon that we all
she is the charismatic loon that we all
she is the charismatic loon that we all find extremely endearing motivated by a
find extremely endearing motivated by a
find extremely endearing motivated by a tragic backstory she has a big heart and
tragic backstory she has a big heart and
tragic backstory she has a big heart and embraces her eccentric
embraces her eccentric
embraces her eccentric the guys on the other hand like Ross is
the guys on the other hand like Ross is
the guys on the other hand like Ross is your typical geek he’ll discover later
your typical geek he’ll discover later
your typical geek he’ll discover later in life that there’s more to living than
in life that there’s more to living than
in life that there’s more to living than just intelligence Chandler
just intelligence Chandler
just intelligence Chandler is the receiving and giving end of every
is the receiving and giving end of every
is the receiving and giving end of every punch line his extreme sarcasm is there
punch line his extreme sarcasm is there
punch line his extreme sarcasm is there to mask his big softy interior and
to mask his big softy interior and
to mask his big softy interior and lastly lustful and trustful joey
lastly lustful and trustful joey
lastly lustful and trustful joey tribianni is not exactly the most
tribianni is not exactly the most
tribianni is not exactly the most intelligent but is definitely the
intelligent but is definitely the
intelligent but is definitely the charming heartthrob that we all fall in
charming heartthrob that we all fall in
charming heartthrob that we all fall in love with now with that said do any of
love with now with that said do any of
love with now with that said do any of these characteristics feel like yourself
these characteristics feel like yourself
these characteristics feel like yourself I personally get the Monica Card a lot
I personally get the Monica Card a lot
I personally get the Monica Card a lot which I don’t really understand because
which I don’t really understand because
which I don’t really understand because I’m not a perfectionist at all next
I’m not a perfectionist at all next
I’m not a perfectionist at all next slide oh right
slide oh right
slide oh right so the real answer is none of you you
so the real answer is none of you you
so the real answer is none of you you aren’t a Chandler or a Monica you are
aren’t a Chandler or a Monica you are
aren’t a Chandler or a Monica you are you and while that is extremely cliche
you and while that is extremely cliche
you and while that is extremely cliche you’ll find it shocking that a lot of
you’ll find it shocking that a lot of
you’ll find it shocking that a lot of teenagers don’t fully believe in this in
teenagers don’t fully believe in this in
teenagers don’t fully believe in this in my personal experience I felt obligated
my personal experience I felt obligated
my personal experience I felt obligated to be the mature humorless one the one
to be the mature humorless one the one
to be the mature humorless one the one who always has to confront another when
who always has to confront another when
who always has to confront another when they’ve made a mistake when I only ever
they’ve made a mistake when I only ever
they’ve made a mistake when I only ever wanted to be the antithesis of that and
wanted to be the antithesis of that and
wanted to be the antithesis of that and I was fully confirmed in my own
I was fully confirmed in my own
I was fully confirmed in my own self-expression that I had an eccentric
self-expression that I had an eccentric
self-expression that I had an eccentric and extroverted side to me but that is
and extroverted side to me but that is
and extroverted side to me but that is the very struggle of adolescent identity
the very struggle of adolescent identity
the very struggle of adolescent identity you see in an age of internet
you see in an age of internet
you see in an age of internet personalities faceless critics and
personalities faceless critics and
personalities faceless critics and infinite phone screens the desire to be
infinite phone screens the desire to be
infinite phone screens the desire to be someone is prevalent and with that
someone is prevalent and with that
someone is prevalent and with that desire we turn to these TV show
desire we turn to these TV show
desire we turn to these TV show archetypes and adapt to their
archetypes and adapt to their
archetypes and adapt to their characteristics hoping that we perform a
characteristics hoping that we perform a
characteristics hoping that we perform a viable role not only in our friendships
viable role not only in our friendships
viable role not only in our friendships but also for our viewers I know that
but also for our viewers I know that
but also for our viewers I know that sounds strange but an applicable quote
sounds strange but an applicable quote
sounds strange but an applicable quote by comedian Bo Burnham is if you can
by comedian Bo Burnham is if you can
by comedian Bo Burnham is if you can live without an audience you should do
live without an audience you should do
live without an audience you should do it when we’re not chasing each other
it when we’re not chasing each other
it when we’re not chasing each other around with open snapchat stories
around with open snapchat stories
around with open snapchat stories word-of-mouth becomes its own form of
word-of-mouth becomes its own form of
word-of-mouth becomes its own form of documentation who said this and who did
documentation who said this and who did
documentation who said this and who did what is a great influence in the
what is a great influence in the
what is a great influence in the decisions we make especially at an age
decisions we make especially at an age
decisions we make especially at an age where self deprecation is very very
where self deprecation is very very
where self deprecation is very very popular
popular
popular so with that
so with that
so with that the problem isn’t as much to deal with
the problem isn’t as much to deal with
the problem isn’t as much to deal with acceptance in fact in an activity where
acceptance in fact in an activity where
acceptance in fact in an activity where students had to rate virtues like
students had to rate virtues like
students had to rate virtues like friendship self-respect family values in
friendship self-respect family values in
friendship self-respect family values in order of importance fitting in was the
order of importance fitting in was the
order of importance fitting in was the least of our concerns with that said we
least of our concerns with that said we
least of our concerns with that said we do not fear to stand out we fear that
do not fear to stand out we fear that
do not fear to stand out we fear that we’re the ones that don’t that’s a
we’re the ones that don’t that’s a
we’re the ones that don’t that’s a little bit ironic right that’s why we’re
little bit ironic right that’s why we’re
little bit ironic right that’s why we’re always beating each other to punchlines
always beating each other to punchlines
always beating each other to punchlines that’s why we’re always creating new
that’s why we’re always creating new
that’s why we’re always creating new labels I’m this I’m that as if that adds
labels I’m this I’m that as if that adds
labels I’m this I’m that as if that adds to our own personal value but in reality
to our own personal value but in reality
to our own personal value but in reality this character you’re making only makes
this character you’re making only makes
this character you’re making only makes you less of yourself in the connection
you less of yourself in the connection
you less of yourself in the connection with friends yes friends should love and
with friends yes friends should love and
with friends yes friends should love and appreciate you for what you are and not
appreciate you for what you are and not
appreciate you for what you are and not what you can give per se that’s why we
what you can give per se that’s why we
what you can give per se that’s why we may not always be the kindness but we
may not always be the kindness but we
may not always be the kindness but we may be the more reliable one we all have
may be the more reliable one we all have
may be the more reliable one we all have these different roles to play but it’s
these different roles to play but it’s
these different roles to play but it’s not staple it’s not written in a book
not staple it’s not written in a book
not staple it’s not written in a book there’s no definition for a good friend
there’s no definition for a good friend
there’s no definition for a good friend a bad friend or so forth and this is why
a bad friend or so forth and this is why
a bad friend or so forth and this is why we need to put ourselves first I have a
we need to put ourselves first I have a
we need to put ourselves first I have a big problem with being myself for myself
big problem with being myself for myself
big problem with being myself for myself rather than others I’m not here to tell
rather than others I’m not here to tell
rather than others I’m not here to tell you how to be the best version of you in
you how to be the best version of you in
you how to be the best version of you in fact that’s the very reason why I wanted
fact that’s the very reason why I wanted
fact that’s the very reason why I wanted to do this talk because I was tired of
to do this talk because I was tired of
to do this talk because I was tired of receiving advice on self-expression that
receiving advice on self-expression that
receiving advice on self-expression that was just like be nicer be out there be
was just like be nicer be out there be
was just like be nicer be out there be more friendly because for some of us
more friendly because for some of us
more friendly because for some of us that’s kind of hard I mean there’s
that’s kind of hard I mean there’s
that’s kind of hard I mean there’s billions of people here and you can’t
billions of people here and you can’t
billions of people here and you can’t expect us to be all connected with one
expect us to be all connected with one
expect us to be all connected with one another in that sense so take this with
another in that sense so take this with
another in that sense so take this with a grain of sand you are the only person
a grain of sand you are the only person
a grain of sand you are the only person in a room you have a name you have
in a room you have a name you have
in a room you have a name you have interests but without that what is left
interests but without that what is left
interests but without that what is left what characters define you
what characters define you
what characters define you you see we can’t always look to Rachel
you see we can’t always look to Rachel
you see we can’t always look to Rachel and say she’s what’s driving my life
and say she’s what’s driving my life
and say she’s what’s driving my life right now this is what I’m going to be
right now this is what I’m going to be
right now this is what I’m going to be and this is what I aspire to be because
and this is what I aspire to be because
and this is what I aspire to be because she’s not you in fact that’s not even
she’s not you in fact that’s not even
she’s not you in fact that’s not even Rachel that’s Jennifer Aniston
Rachel that’s Jennifer Aniston
Rachel that’s Jennifer Aniston so maybe the struggle to find new labels
so maybe the struggle to find new labels
so maybe the struggle to find new labels and terms is the very thing that’s
and terms is the very thing that’s
and terms is the very thing that’s preventing us from finding our own
preventing us from finding our own
preventing us from finding our own status and our own name thank you
status and our own name thank you
status and our own name thank you [Applause]
”
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