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Ignorance is not Bliss – What You Don’t Know can Cost You | Timothy Lee | TEDxTurtleCove


I want to shave with you tonight about

I want to shave with you tonight about part of my journey and what life is all

part of my journey and what life is all

part of my journey and what life is all about for me and and what I think I am

about for me and and what I think I am

about for me and and what I think I am and I want to share with you some of my

and I want to share with you some of my

and I want to share with you some of my journeys that are painful and some of my

journeys that are painful and some of my

journeys that are painful and some of my journeys that are quite fun so it’s a

journeys that are quite fun so it’s a

journeys that are quite fun so it’s a little bit of a roller coaster ride and

little bit of a roller coaster ride and

little bit of a roller coaster ride and so my topic is ignorance is not bliss

so my topic is ignorance is not bliss

so my topic is ignorance is not bliss what you don’t know about yourself can

what you don’t know about yourself can

what you don’t know about yourself can cost you now we’re bombarded with tons

cost you now we’re bombarded with tons

cost you now we’re bombarded with tons of decision makings to do everyday many

of decision makings to do everyday many

of decision makings to do everyday many things matters compete for our attention

things matters compete for our attention

things matters compete for our attention so what do we have to do we have to make

so what do we have to do we have to make

so what do we have to do we have to make decisions about what to address what to

decisions about what to address what to

decisions about what to address what to pay attention to what to know more about

pay attention to what to know more about

pay attention to what to know more about and what to ignore and this is a very

and what to ignore and this is a very

and what to ignore and this is a very normal part of our life so the things

normal part of our life so the things

normal part of our life so the things that matter to us the things that’s

that matter to us the things that’s

that matter to us the things that’s going to be consequential the things

going to be consequential the things

going to be consequential the things that will bring good are our eyes we

that will bring good are our eyes we

that will bring good are our eyes we take care of in fact

take care of in fact

take care of in fact we search the web and we enhance

we search the web and we enhance

we search the web and we enhance ourselves and we get to know more and

ourselves and we get to know more and

ourselves and we get to know more and more so that we can get the best return

more so that we can get the best return

more so that we can get the best return and there’s absolutely nothing wrong

and there’s absolutely nothing wrong

and there’s absolutely nothing wrong about that and those that are

about that and those that are

about that and those that are inconsequential those that we think now

inconsequential those that we think now

inconsequential those that we think now it’s not important those that we think I

it’s not important those that we think I

it’s not important those that we think I will leave it alone for a while it’s not

will leave it alone for a while it’s not

will leave it alone for a while it’s not going to explode

going to explode

going to explode we don’t pay much attention to it that’s

we don’t pay much attention to it that’s

we don’t pay much attention to it that’s good resource management and I think

good resource management and I think

good resource management and I think that’s pretty good optimization of

that’s pretty good optimization of

that’s pretty good optimization of productivity and efficiency and that’s

productivity and efficiency and that’s

productivity and efficiency and that’s we all do but what is what are in the

we all do but what is what are in the

we all do but what is what are in the course of our decision-making about

course of our decision-making about

course of our decision-making about what’s important what’s consequential

what’s important what’s consequential

what’s important what’s consequential and what’s not what if we made a mistake

and what’s not what if we made a mistake

and what’s not what if we made a mistake what if somewhere on the line we got all

what if somewhere on the line we got all

what if somewhere on the line we got all important stuff now what if some of the

important stuff now what if some of the

important stuff now what if some of the nest becomes Wow and so I think it’s

nest becomes Wow and so I think it’s

nest becomes Wow and so I think it’s quite important the thing about you know

quite important the thing about you know

quite important the thing about you know artisan making what we choose to ignore

artisan making what we choose to ignore

artisan making what we choose to ignore or even become ignorant of and what we

or even become ignorant of and what we

or even become ignorant of and what we choose to pay attention to and so let’s

choose to pay attention to and so let’s

choose to pay attention to and so let’s talk about ink there is a little bit the

talk about ink there is a little bit the

talk about ink there is a little bit the two aspects of ignorance

two aspects of ignorance

two aspects of ignorance share with you it’s part of my own

share with you it’s part of my own

share with you it’s part of my own realization one is in our own

realization one is in our own

realization one is in our own deficiencies now if there’s one category

deficiencies now if there’s one category

deficiencies now if there’s one category of matters that we decide is the part

of matters that we decide is the part

of matters that we decide is the part that will be our deficiencies nobody

that will be our deficiencies nobody

that will be our deficiencies nobody likes to talk about what they’re not

likes to talk about what they’re not

likes to talk about what they’re not good at nobody it’s not good looking

good at nobody it’s not good looking

good at nobody it’s not good looking it doesn’t feel good talking about it we

it doesn’t feel good talking about it we

it doesn’t feel good talking about it we just tend to cover it and it’s human

just tend to cover it and it’s human

just tend to cover it and it’s human nature to do that and that’s nothing

nature to do that and that’s nothing

nature to do that and that’s nothing wrong with it

wrong with it

wrong with it but what if it blows up in your face

but what if it blows up in your face

but what if it blows up in your face what is that that inconspicuous tear one

what is that that inconspicuous tear one

what is that that inconspicuous tear one day becomes a chasm in a relationship

day becomes a chasm in a relationship

day becomes a chasm in a relationship that you really treasure what if that

that you really treasure what if that

that you really treasure what if that happens what is that unnoticeable

happens what is that unnoticeable

happens what is that unnoticeable blemish later became the cause of a

blemish later became the cause of a

blemish later became the cause of a career disaster that ends in a scandal

career disaster that ends in a scandal

career disaster that ends in a scandal those things could happen and so it

those things could happen and so it

those things could happen and so it seems to me that looking at our own

seems to me that looking at our own

seems to me that looking at our own deficiencies become quite important but

deficiencies become quite important but

deficiencies become quite important but we are very good and not doing that in

we are very good and not doing that in

we are very good and not doing that in fact we invent positive words to

fact we invent positive words to

fact we invent positive words to describe negative things and look at CDs

describe negative things and look at CDs

describe negative things and look at CDs all the time we are constantly hiring

all the time we are constantly hiring

all the time we are constantly hiring teachers and consultants and do that and

teachers and consultants and do that and

teachers and consultants and do that and so I’m looking at CVS almost every week

so I’m looking at CVS almost every week

so I’m looking at CVS almost every week and you know when it comes to skills you

and you know when it comes to skills you

and you know when it comes to skills you know Excel Microsoft Office then we use

know Excel Microsoft Office then we use

know Excel Microsoft Office then we use words like mastery over that means the

words like mastery over that means the

words like mastery over that means the guy is good sometimes people use

guy is good sometimes people use

guy is good sometimes people use proficient act and you know something is

proficient act and you know something is

proficient act and you know something is not quite right when people use

not quite right when people use

not quite right when people use proficient ad because maybe they’re good

proficient ad because maybe they’re good

proficient ad because maybe they’re good at it but there are some things about

at it but there are some things about

at it but there are some things about the office Microsoft Office that they’re

the office Microsoft Office that they’re

the office Microsoft Office that they’re very good at so the use of positive word

very good at so the use of positive word

very good at so the use of positive word maybe a lower grade positive word to

maybe a lower grade positive word to

maybe a lower grade positive word to imply there’s some great area of

imply there’s some great area of

imply there’s some great area of deficiency well what’s the next level

deficiency well what’s the next level

deficiency well what’s the next level down I’ve seen the resume that says I am

down I’ve seen the resume that says I am

down I’ve seen the resume that says I am knowledgeable about well I know about

knowledgeable about well I know about

knowledgeable about well I know about Microsoft Office I may not know what to

Microsoft Office I may not know what to

Microsoft Office I may not know what to do good if I know about it so we are

do good if I know about it so we are

do good if I know about it so we are very

very

very in using positive words to cover up and

in using positive words to cover up and

in using positive words to cover up and what’s more interesting is that when we

what’s more interesting is that when we

what’s more interesting is that when we do the series and hopefully after this

do the series and hopefully after this

do the series and hopefully after this talk when you look at your own CV or

talk when you look at your own CV or

talk when you look at your own CV or when you look at other people’s CV you

when you look at other people’s CV you

when you look at other people’s CV you have a different perspective what is the

have a different perspective what is the

have a different perspective what is the CD anyway is curriculum vitae course of

CD anyway is curriculum vitae course of

CD anyway is curriculum vitae course of life now how come everybody’s course or

life now how come everybody’s course or

life now how come everybody’s course or lab is positive how come everybody’s

lab is positive how come everybody’s

lab is positive how come everybody’s perfect I have no understanding of that

perfect I have no understanding of that

perfect I have no understanding of that I’ve never seen a CD that goes well I am

I’ve never seen a CD that goes well I am

I’ve never seen a CD that goes well I am a borderline team player you know I

a borderline team player you know I

a borderline team player you know I don’t follow instructions well I’ve

don’t follow instructions well I’ve

don’t follow instructions well I’ve erratic mood swing and I have no control

erratic mood swing and I have no control

erratic mood swing and I have no control over spending you never see that but it

over spending you never see that but it

over spending you never see that but it seems to me that you know we have turned

seems to me that you know we have turned

seems to me that you know we have turned many many things around we do everything

many many things around we do everything

many many things around we do everything we can we even rename CV so they has a

we can we even rename CV so they has a

we can we even rename CV so they has a different meaning if a CV is supposed to

different meaning if a CV is supposed to

different meaning if a CV is supposed to be a CV then it has to be the course of

be a CV then it has to be the course of

be a CV then it has to be the course of your life both the good and the bad well

your life both the good and the bad well

your life both the good and the bad well maybe we should have a curriculum bit

maybe we should have a curriculum bit

maybe we should have a curriculum bit high and curriculum mortis positive and

high and curriculum mortis positive and

high and curriculum mortis positive and negative to show me both in fact as an

negative to show me both in fact as an

negative to show me both in fact as an employer I really want to see what

employer I really want to see what

employer I really want to see what people are not good at so you know we do

people are not good at so you know we do

people are not good at so you know we do all sorts of things so what are the

all sorts of things so what are the

all sorts of things so what are the things we do is we kind of cover up our

things we do is we kind of cover up our

things we do is we kind of cover up our own deficiencies now you may say that’s

own deficiencies now you may say that’s

own deficiencies now you may say that’s my life that’s how I run my life

my life that’s how I run my life

my life that’s how I run my life bug off okay fun right and sometimes we

bug off okay fun right and sometimes we

bug off okay fun right and sometimes we choose to do that we know things are not

choose to do that we know things are not

choose to do that we know things are not quite right but there are other matters

quite right but there are other matters

quite right but there are other matters that are more urgent and so we cover up

that are more urgent and so we cover up

that are more urgent and so we cover up sometimes we ignore sometimes we tend to

sometimes we ignore sometimes we tend to

sometimes we ignore sometimes we tend to be ignorant about and what the tragedy

be ignorant about and what the tragedy

be ignorant about and what the tragedy is number two you know ignorance is not

is number two you know ignorance is not

is number two you know ignorance is not bliss when we experience the

bliss when we experience the

bliss when we experience the inevitability of the horrendous

inevitability of the horrendous

inevitability of the horrendous of deficiency unaddressed that’s a

of deficiency unaddressed that’s a

of deficiency unaddressed that’s a problem now let me share with you

problem now let me share with you

problem now let me share with you something that happened to me so it

something that happened to me so it

something that happened to me so it starts pretty bad but it will end well

starts pretty bad but it will end well

starts pretty bad but it will end well don’t worry you will end quite well I

never knew that I had an issue of

never knew that I had an issue of abandonment that I felt abandoned and

abandonment that I felt abandoned and

abandonment that I felt abandoned and out of that there was sense of

out of that there was sense of

out of that there was sense of insecurity deeply rooted and a sense of

insecurity deeply rooted and a sense of

insecurity deeply rooted and a sense of inferiority complex you know these are

inferiority complex you know these are

inferiority complex you know these are pretty bad things I never knew that I

pretty bad things I never knew that I

pretty bad things I never knew that I thought I was fine I realized that I had

thought I was fine I realized that I had

thought I was fine I realized that I had some emotional problems of insecurity of

some emotional problems of insecurity of

some emotional problems of insecurity of blurring of personal boundaries when I

blurring of personal boundaries when I

blurring of personal boundaries when I became kind of ill and I went to see a

became kind of ill and I went to see a

became kind of ill and I went to see a counselor and I went through some

counselor and I went through some

counselor and I went through some intensive counseling you say a lot that

intensive counseling you say a lot that

intensive counseling you say a lot that happens all the time you know that’s

happens all the time you know that’s

happens all the time you know that’s good job your job is to dig up dirt you

good job your job is to dig up dirt you

good job your job is to dig up dirt you know that’s how they justify you paying

know that’s how they justify you paying

know that’s how they justify you paying them to dig up your dirt but that

them to dig up your dirt but that

them to dig up your dirt but that shouldn’t have happened to me not

shouldn’t have happened to me not

shouldn’t have happened to me not because I was perfect by any means but

because I was perfect by any means but

because I was perfect by any means but that should happen to a person with a

that should happen to a person with a

that should happen to a person with a graduate training in counseling and

graduate training in counseling and

graduate training in counseling and ministry that should happen to a person

ministry that should happen to a person

ministry that should happen to a person who does life coaching to business

who does life coaching to business

who does life coaching to business leaders in Silicon Valley that shouldn’t

leaders in Silicon Valley that shouldn’t

leaders in Silicon Valley that shouldn’t be happening to people people to a

be happening to people people to a

be happening to people people to a person who does career counseling to

person who does career counseling to

person who does career counseling to executives who does marital counseling

executives who does marital counseling

executives who does marital counseling to families and into generations that

to families and into generations that

to families and into generations that shouldn’t happen to that person because

shouldn’t happen to that person because

shouldn’t happen to that person because that person is equipped to tank knows to

that person is equipped to tank knows to

that person is equipped to tank knows to dig up to analyze to cancel and to help

dig up to analyze to cancel and to help

dig up to analyze to cancel and to help heal I’m telling you this I knew every

heal I’m telling you this I knew every

heal I’m telling you this I knew every problem that people have I’ve seen it

problem that people have I’ve seen it

problem that people have I’ve seen it all you know the pre IPO jitters the

all you know the pre IPO jitters the

all you know the pre IPO jitters the post IPO

post IPO

post IPO letäôs midlife crisis empty nest

letäôs midlife crisis empty nest

letäôs midlife crisis empty nest dysfunction relationships suicidal

dysfunction relationships suicidal

dysfunction relationships suicidal tendencies depressions you name it I’ve

tendencies depressions you name it I’ve

tendencies depressions you name it I’ve seen it all and I knew it all and I had

seen it all and I knew it all and I had

seen it all and I knew it all and I had a good head on my shoulders

a good head on my shoulders

a good head on my shoulders you know being trainer MIT with

you know being trainer MIT with

you know being trainer MIT with engineering I was rational

engineering I was rational

engineering I was rational I was totally equipped I was like the

I was totally equipped I was like the

I was totally equipped I was like the almost perfect robot to be the doctor to

almost perfect robot to be the doctor to

almost perfect robot to be the doctor to heal so I knew everything about what

heal so I knew everything about what

heal so I knew everything about what people are dealing with except my own I

people are dealing with except my own I

people are dealing with except my own I never knew that and two things come into

never knew that and two things come into

never knew that and two things come into trouble I ended up having some

trouble I ended up having some

trouble I ended up having some behavioral issues bad habits

behavioral issues bad habits

behavioral issues bad habits character issues then I realize

character issues then I realize

character issues then I realize something is deeply wrong and that’s

something is deeply wrong and that’s

something is deeply wrong and that’s when I discovered the wait a minute this

when I discovered the wait a minute this

when I discovered the wait a minute this is not funny

is not funny

is not funny and what happened was that it didn’t go

and what happened was that it didn’t go

and what happened was that it didn’t go addressed on time and I ended up having

addressed on time and I ended up having

addressed on time and I ended up having a broken marriage and of more than 20

a broken marriage and of more than 20

a broken marriage and of more than 20 years and aesthetic career that is

years and aesthetic career that is

years and aesthetic career that is internationally rooted both collapse so

internationally rooted both collapse so

internationally rooted both collapse so I was riding high one at one moment and

I was riding high one at one moment and

I was riding high one at one moment and the next moment I was kind of crawling

the next moment I was kind of crawling

the next moment I was kind of crawling low so irrational about my background is

low so irrational about my background is

low so irrational about my background is because if it hadn’t happened to me it

because if it hadn’t happened to me it

because if it hadn’t happened to me it could happen to anyone I mean if it

could happen to anyone I mean if it

could happen to anyone I mean if it could happen to a trained professional

could happen to a trained professional

could happen to a trained professional somebody who is the eye and the heart

somebody who is the eye and the heart

somebody who is the eye and the heart and the mind to see through things to

and the mind to see through things to

and the mind to see through things to diagnose to look at the efficiencies and

diagnose to look at the efficiencies and

diagnose to look at the efficiencies and yet he himself fell into the trap if

yet he himself fell into the trap if

yet he himself fell into the trap if that could happen to me and that did

that could happen to me and that did

that could happen to me and that did happen to anyone

happen to anyone

happen to anyone and it’s always there in the ability of

things that we don’t know about

things that we don’t know about ourselves that we should have addressed

ourselves that we should have addressed

ourselves that we should have addressed well this is lower nature we are all

well this is lower nature we are all

well this is lower nature we are all human being so we come with the package

human being so we come with the package

human being so we come with the package to you right you cannot select it good

to you right you cannot select it good

to you right you cannot select it good and don’t have too bad

and don’t have too bad

and don’t have too bad so let’s not feel bad about it we all

so let’s not feel bad about it we all

so let’s not feel bad about it we all come to the package with the positives

come to the package with the positives

come to the package with the positives there is some negatives take it or leave

there is some negatives take it or leave

there is some negatives take it or leave it

it

it so that’s

so that’s

so that’s we are we are have some sort of

we are we are have some sort of

we are we are have some sort of woundedness we all have some sense of

woundedness we all have some sense of

woundedness we all have some sense of you know unfulfilled in relationships we

you know unfulfilled in relationships we

you know unfulfilled in relationships we all have some things that we know we

all have some things that we know we

all have some things that we know we should have done and that we’re not

should have done and that we’re not

should have done and that we’re not doing well but we’re just paying

doing well but we’re just paying

doing well but we’re just paying attention to it and so that’s what

attention to it and so that’s what

attention to it and so that’s what happened to me and so after the collapse

happened to me and so after the collapse

happened to me and so after the collapse of my career and my marriage all at the

of my career and my marriage all at the

of my career and my marriage all at the same time I mean talk about stress in

same time I mean talk about stress in

same time I mean talk about stress in life those are the two major stressors

life those are the two major stressors

life those are the two major stressors in life I was lucky I didn’t go crazy

in life I was lucky I didn’t go crazy

in life I was lucky I didn’t go crazy after that I realized that wait a minute

after that I realized that wait a minute

after that I realized that wait a minute I better take inventory I better take a

I better take inventory I better take a

I better take inventory I better take a closer look at what’s going on and so I

closer look at what’s going on and so I

closer look at what’s going on and so I began to think about want to think about

you know now once a while we may do

you know now once a while we may do things that we think all right is the

things that we think all right is the

things that we think all right is the demonstration of fundamental now once a

demonstration of fundamental now once a

demonstration of fundamental now once a while was short well I’m great

while was short well I’m great

while was short well I’m great and when I want my juicy hamburger

and when I want my juicy hamburger

and when I want my juicy hamburger cheeseburger with the right amount of

cheeseburger with the right amount of

cheeseburger with the right amount of child and the right amount of cheese and

child and the right amount of cheese and

child and the right amount of cheese and with the bridge just nicely grilled you

with the bridge just nicely grilled you

with the bridge just nicely grilled you know washed out with a special you know

know washed out with a special you know

know washed out with a special you know milk with the white disgustedly

milk with the white disgustedly

milk with the white disgustedly that comes with a spoon as a standing

that comes with a spoon as a standing

that comes with a spoon as a standing issue and after the night we have an

issue and after the night we have an

issue and after the night we have an advocate animal at the apple pie has to

advocate animal at the apple pie has to

advocate animal at the apple pie has to be made with green apples when I prayed

be made with green apples when I prayed

be made with green apples when I prayed for that at the moment I didn’t I was

for that at the moment I didn’t I was

for that at the moment I didn’t I was like 5 minutes and so the question we

like 5 minutes and so the question we

like 5 minutes and so the question we have to ask ourselves if you want to

have to ask ourselves if you want to

have to ask ourselves if you want to think what I did and I Know Who am I

think what I did and I Know Who am I

think what I did and I Know Who am I really

really

really who are you really what defines you how

who are you really what defines you how

who are you really what defines you how we serve about who we are the answer is

we serve about who we are the answer is

we serve about who we are the answer is what do you what is it a horror movie

what do you what is it a horror movie

what do you what is it a horror movie what would he turn to move on in terms

what would he turn to move on in terms

what would he turn to move on in terms of excitement fulfillment realize when I

of excitement fulfillment realize when I

of excitement fulfillment realize when I started looking at my truth or my

started looking at my truth or my

started looking at my truth or my balance then I’ve been living like a

balance then I’ve been living like a

balance then I’ve been living like a tick and my deficiency in our life

tick and my deficiency in our life

tick and my deficiency in our life landmarks connected tofu well one of

landmarks connected tofu well one of

landmarks connected tofu well one of those days so to me was better home time

those days so to me was better home time

those days so to me was better home time when I had looked into my family but I

when I had looked into my family but I

when I had looked into my family but I really want but I’m going to desire he

really want but I’m going to desire he

really want but I’m going to desire he was not coming home

was not coming home

was not coming home he was not being true to myself I mean I

he was not being true to myself I mean I

he was not being true to myself I mean I can talk of my home the humanistic

can talk of my home the humanistic

can talk of my home the humanistic all but I think for me now true home is

all but I think for me now true home is

all but I think for me now true home is where I live

where I live

where I live being true to myself and according to

being true to myself and according to

being true to myself and according to the banner that I think is one and so I

the banner that I think is one and so I

the banner that I think is one and so I invite you also tonight to think about

invite you also tonight to think about

invite you also tonight to think about what is the matter but it’s a tutorial

what is the matter but it’s a tutorial

what is the matter but it’s a tutorial because they realize the fulfillment of

because they realize the fulfillment of

because they realize the fulfillment of life and now I’m very happy I’m

life and now I’m very happy I’m

life and now I’m very happy I’m indicating my teaching stem experiences

indicating my teaching stem experiences

indicating my teaching stem experiences I told you leveraging that in career

I told you leveraging that in career

I told you leveraging that in career coaching in counseling and working with

coaching in counseling and working with

coaching in counseling and working with young people and adults alike if you

young people and adults alike if you

young people and adults alike if you mentoring them working with them

mentoring them working with them

mentoring them working with them motivating them and encouraging them to

motivating them and encouraging them to

motivating them and encouraging them to find out true north and not be ashamed

find out true north and not be ashamed

find out true north and not be ashamed about their own deficiencies because at

about their own deficiencies because at

about their own deficiencies because at the very discovery of deficiencies we

the very discovery of deficiencies we

the very discovery of deficiencies we begin to find our true home so

”

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