it’s actually Tonya Gilley kailani I’m very proud of what my father talking it
very proud of what my father talking it
very proud of what my father talking it to I’m not just my husband my story
to I’m not just my husband my story
to I’m not just my husband my story begins when I was 12 years old we had
begins when I was 12 years old we had
begins when I was 12 years old we had come back to Iraq for a visit with
come back to Iraq for a visit with
come back to Iraq for a visit with family and during that visit an uncle of
family and during that visit an uncle of
family and during that visit an uncle of mine passed away so as it is customary
mine passed away so as it is customary
mine passed away so as it is customary in Kurdish fashion they lined the whole
in Kurdish fashion they lined the whole
in Kurdish fashion they lined the whole family up in a minibus and we had to go
family up in a minibus and we had to go
family up in a minibus and we had to go from Kirkuk to Erbil for my uncle’s
from Kirkuk to Erbil for my uncle’s
from Kirkuk to Erbil for my uncle’s funeral as we were on this journey what
funeral as we were on this journey what
funeral as we were on this journey what happened I started seeing villages that
happened I started seeing villages that
happened I started seeing villages that were in rubble and I was surprised
were in rubble and I was surprised
were in rubble and I was surprised because they seemed like fairly good
because they seemed like fairly good
because they seemed like fairly good villages some of the ones that were
villages some of the ones that were
villages some of the ones that were close to the street but even the ones
close to the street but even the ones
close to the street but even the ones that were further and I started seeing
that were further and I started seeing
that were further and I started seeing village after village after village that
village after village after village that
village after village after village that was destroyed now like every Kurdish
was destroyed now like every Kurdish
was destroyed now like every Kurdish person my story is not unique
person my story is not unique
person my story is not unique we all have suffered I have had two
we all have suffered I have had two
we all have suffered I have had two family members that were killed I’ve had
family members that were killed I’ve had
family members that were killed I’ve had family members that were tortured some
family members that were tortured some
family members that were tortured some that were put in prison some had to flee
that were put in prison some had to flee
that were put in prison some had to flee the country in order to save their lives
the country in order to save their lives
the country in order to save their lives but seeing those destroyed villages took
but seeing those destroyed villages took
but seeing those destroyed villages took my pain I my feeling of injustice to a
my pain I my feeling of injustice to a
my pain I my feeling of injustice to a different level because I knew like
different level because I knew like
different level because I knew like every Kurdish person does the the
every Kurdish person does the the
every Kurdish person does the the backbone of Kurdish society the the
backbone of Kurdish society the the
backbone of Kurdish society the the vitality of our society comes from our
vitality of our society comes from our
vitality of our society comes from our villages and when those are destroyed it
villages and when those are destroyed it
villages and when those are destroyed it means that the whole community is going
means that the whole community is going
means that the whole community is going to be destroyed it was at that moment
to be destroyed it was at that moment
to be destroyed it was at that moment that I knew my fight for human rights
that I knew my fight for human rights
that I knew my fight for human rights must start my fight for intolerance
must start my fight for intolerance
must start my fight for intolerance eradicating intolerance must start so I
eradicating intolerance must start so I
eradicating intolerance must start so I started going to rallies
started going to rallies
started going to rallies and I started going to hunger strikes
and I started going to hunger strikes
and I started going to hunger strikes and I started participating in marches I
and I started participating in marches I
and I started participating in marches I started the one of the pictures you see
started the one of the pictures you see
started the one of the pictures you see me in with my hunger strike with my
me in with my hunger strike with my
me in with my hunger strike with my father and the other one is at a rally
father and the other one is at a rally
father and the other one is at a rally so we started making signs I remember
so we started making signs I remember
so we started making signs I remember making a sign as a child that said I
making a sign as a child that said I
making a sign as a child that said I want to live it is my right with a
want to live it is my right with a
want to live it is my right with a picture of a Kurdish child next to it
picture of a Kurdish child next to it
picture of a Kurdish child next to it these are the kinds of things that you
these are the kinds of things that you
these are the kinds of things that you don’t forget and unfortunately these
don’t forget and unfortunately these
don’t forget and unfortunately these atrocities kept on coming and coming
atrocities kept on coming and coming
atrocities kept on coming and coming we had the Halabja massacre we had the
we had the Halabja massacre we had the
we had the Halabja massacre we had the mass graves the Anfal campaign continued
mass graves the Anfal campaign continued
mass graves the Anfal campaign continued and to this day our community and our
and to this day our community and our
and to this day our community and our society still suffers so I started going
society still suffers so I started going
society still suffers so I started going to more rallies I started participating
to more rallies I started participating
to more rallies I started participating in more marches I started organizing
in more marches I started organizing
in more marches I started organizing some of those marches and I started
some of those marches and I started
some of those marches and I started grabbing the megaphone and reading the
grabbing the megaphone and reading the
grabbing the megaphone and reading the slogans but then people started taking
slogans but then people started taking
slogans but then people started taking notice not because I was doing a good
notice not because I was doing a good
notice not because I was doing a good job it was because I was a young woman
job it was because I was a young woman
job it was because I was a young woman doing a good job and that’s when I
doing a good job and that’s when I
doing a good job and that’s when I started hearing comments I started
started hearing comments I started
started hearing comments I started hearing insinuations I’m sure every
hearing insinuations I’m sure every
hearing insinuations I’m sure every single Kurdish woman hears in her life
single Kurdish woman hears in her life
single Kurdish woman hears in her life and actually not just British women
and actually not just British women
and actually not just British women everybody in all societies hear these
everybody in all societies hear these
everybody in all societies hear these kinds of comments and insinuations and
kinds of comments and insinuations and
kinds of comments and insinuations and that’s when I realized there’s another
that’s when I realized there’s another
that’s when I realized there’s another battle that I must fight there’s another
battle that I must fight there’s another
battle that I must fight there’s another battle that I must take on and that was
battle that I must take on and that was
battle that I must take on and that was a much more difficult one because it was
a much more difficult one because it was
a much more difficult one because it was a battle that I was fighting I can
a battle that I was fighting I can
a battle that I was fighting I can against my comrades at cause it was
against my comrades at cause it was
against my comrades at cause it was against the people that are working with
against the people that are working with
against the people that are working with so closely so that we can we shared a
so closely so that we can we shared a
so closely so that we can we shared a vision to bring peace and tolerance to
vision to bring peace and tolerance to
vision to bring peace and tolerance to our region but this is when I realized
our region but this is when I realized
our region but this is when I realized again that it’s very important for us
again that it’s very important for us
again that it’s very important for us that we as women must participate in
that we as women must participate in
that we as women must participate in building the peace fighting for peace
building the peace fighting for peace
building the peace fighting for peace and waging the peace and not just
and waging the peace and not just
and waging the peace and not just waiting for it to happen so if you want
waiting for it to happen so if you want
waiting for it to happen so if you want to make change if you want to make real
to make change if you want to make real
to make change if you want to make real positive change everybody must be
positive change everybody must be
positive change everybody must be involved in that chain
involved in that chain
involved in that chain [Music]
[Music]
[Music] when we say women building peace there
when we say women building peace there
when we say women building peace there are three components to this the first
are three components to this the first
are three components to this the first one being why it matters what we do and
one being why it matters what we do and
one being why it matters what we do and how we do it
how we do it
how we do it so if we talk about why it matters we
so if we talk about why it matters we
so if we talk about why it matters we must realize that we live in a
must realize that we live in a
must realize that we live in a neighborhood that is quite tough
neighborhood that is quite tough
neighborhood that is quite tough unfortunately war is the norm and peace
unfortunately war is the norm and peace
unfortunately war is the norm and peace is the deviant in this region so what do
is the deviant in this region so what do
is the deviant in this region so what do we do according to the 207 to 2017 peace
we do according to the 207 to 2017 peace
we do according to the 207 to 2017 peace Global Peace Index Iraq actually was
Global Peace Index Iraq actually was
Global Peace Index Iraq actually was ranked a hundred and one hundred one
ranked a hundred and one hundred one
ranked a hundred and one hundred one hundred and sixty first country on that
hundred and sixty first country on that
hundred and sixty first country on that list of least peaceful countries
list of least peaceful countries
list of least peaceful countries followed by Syria and Afghanistan or I
followed by Syria and Afghanistan or I
followed by Syria and Afghanistan or I think was Afghanistan and Syria the MENA
think was Afghanistan and Syria the MENA
think was Afghanistan and Syria the MENA region or the Middle East and North
region or the Middle East and North
region or the Middle East and North Africa region for the fifth consecutive
Africa region for the fifth consecutive
Africa region for the fifth consecutive year they are still considered the least
year they are still considered the least
year they are still considered the least peaceful region in all of the world
studies have shown that the economic
studies have shown that the economic impact of violence on global economy was
impact of violence on global economy was
impact of violence on global economy was fourteen point three trillion dollars in
fourteen point three trillion dollars in
fourteen point three trillion dollars in 2016 alone so in order for us to have
2016 alone so in order for us to have
2016 alone so in order for us to have lasting peace and to prevent all these
lasting peace and to prevent all these
lasting peace and to prevent all these atrocities that happening I believe and
atrocities that happening I believe and
atrocities that happening I believe and studies have shown also that all
studies have shown also that all
studies have shown also that all components of society must participate
components of society must participate
components of society must participate in building that peace and when we hear
in building that peace and when we hear
in building that peace and when we hear we keep on hearing all the time they
we keep on hearing all the time they
we keep on hearing all the time they tell us women are 50% of society and
tell us women are 50% of society and
tell us women are 50% of society and they’re the mothers of the other 50%
they’re the mothers of the other 50%
they’re the mothers of the other 50% well then where’s our place at the table
well then where’s our place at the table
well then where’s our place at the table how come we’re not at 50% sitting at the
how come we’re not at 50% sitting at the
how come we’re not at 50% sitting at the negotiations table
one of my favorite quotes that I keep on
one of my favorite quotes that I keep on reading every once in a while every time
reading every once in a while every time
reading every once in a while every time I feel down or every time I feel that
I feel down or every time I feel that
I feel down or every time I feel that I’m really the fight is not going the
I’m really the fight is not going the
I’m really the fight is not going the way I wanted to go is this great quote
way I wanted to go is this great quote
way I wanted to go is this great quote by Mandela when he says freedom cannot
by Mandela when he says freedom cannot
by Mandela when he says freedom cannot be beat
be beat
be beat cannot be achieved unless the women have
cannot be achieved unless the women have
cannot be achieved unless the women have been emancipated emancipated from all
been emancipated emancipated from all
been emancipated emancipated from all forms of oppression what does that mean
forms of oppression what does that mean
forms of oppression what does that mean there are Empress there is oppression
there are Empress there is oppression
there are Empress there is oppression from within our communities from within
from within our communities from within
from within our communities from within ourselves from within our societies we
ourselves from within our societies we
ourselves from within our societies we must fight all of those and since we are
must fight all of those and since we are
must fight all of those and since we are the main caretakers of our families
the main caretakers of our families
the main caretakers of our families everyone suffers when we are oppressed
everyone suffers when we are oppressed
everyone suffers when we are oppressed our priorities as women tend to be
our priorities as women tend to be
our priorities as women tend to be different we actually feel and
different we actually feel and
different we actually feel and experience war and peace differently
experience war and peace differently
experience war and peace differently than the way men do the way we think
than the way men do the way we think
than the way men do the way we think about what we want what our vision is is
about what we want what our vision is is
about what we want what our vision is is very different from the way men do for
very different from the way men do for
very different from the way men do for example did you know that actually these
example did you know that actually these
example did you know that actually these treaties where women are actually
treaties where women are actually
treaties where women are actually signatories or they’ve participated
signatories or they’ve participated
signatories or they’ve participated there’s a 24% chance
there’s a 24% chance
there’s a 24% chance higher that they would actually last
higher that they would actually last
higher that they would actually last longer than if women were not
longer than if women were not
longer than if women were not participating and again we say that
participating and again we say that
participating and again we say that where are the women so if we look at
where are the women so if we look at
where are the women so if we look at these numbers here unfortunately even
these numbers here unfortunately even
these numbers here unfortunately even though women have been participating or
though women have been participating or
though women have been participating or have been trying to lobby for more
have been trying to lobby for more
have been trying to lobby for more participation in the peace building
participation in the peace building
participation in the peace building process only 2% of chief mediators I
process only 2% of chief mediators I
process only 2% of chief mediators I mean peace negotiations are women 4% of
mean peace negotiations are women 4% of
mean peace negotiations are women 4% of signatories are women and only 9% of all
signatories are women and only 9% of all
signatories are women and only 9% of all negotiators are women again where is
negotiators are women again where is
negotiators are women again where is that 50% what we do what we do
women tend to work differently studies
women tend to work differently studies have shown that we tend to be more
have shown that we tend to be more
have shown that we tend to be more inclusive whenever we are working on
inclusive whenever we are working on
inclusive whenever we are working on projects whenever we have an idea that
projects whenever we have an idea that
projects whenever we have an idea that we want to share that we want to spread
we want to share that we want to spread
we want to share that we want to spread we always try and find common ground we
we always try and find common ground we
we always try and find common ground we always try and build bridges and try and
always try and build bridges and try and
always try and build bridges and try and MIT each meet each other in the middle
MIT each meet each other in the middle
MIT each meet each other in the middle it’s not about scoring a goal against
it’s not about scoring a goal against
it’s not about scoring a goal against the other side for us it’s about finding
the other side for us it’s about finding
the other side for us it’s about finding a common ground a fun common ground
a common ground a fun common ground
a common ground a fun common ground where everybody’s a winner and there are
where everybody’s a winner and there are
where everybody’s a winner and there are no losers our priorities as mothers as
no losers our priorities as mothers as
no losers our priorities as mothers as daughters as wives as partners are very
daughters as wives as partners are very
daughters as wives as partners are very different for example as a mother when
different for example as a mother when
different for example as a mother when there is a war for me it’s important
there is a war for me it’s important
there is a war for me it’s important that my child still continues to go to
that my child still continues to go to
that my child still continues to go to school and he is safe when he goes to
school and he is safe when he goes to
school and he is safe when he goes to school and he comes home safe however
school and he comes home safe however
school and he comes home safe however the men tend to think about how we can
the men tend to think about how we can
the men tend to think about how we can win more territory how we can win more
win more territory how we can win more
win more territory how we can win more in terms of numbers in terms of killings
in terms of numbers in terms of killings
in terms of numbers in terms of killings unfortunately so that’s why it’s very
unfortunately so that’s why it’s very
unfortunately so that’s why it’s very important to realize that these
important to realize that these
important to realize that these differences really make the peace
differences really make the peace
differences really make the peace process between men and women make the
process between men and women make the
process between men and women make the peace process a lot more lasting and
peace process a lot more lasting and
peace process a lot more lasting and much better so how we why sorry how we
much better so how we why sorry how we
much better so how we why sorry how we do it by getting creative I just want to
do it by getting creative I just want to
do it by getting creative I just want to talk about some examples of in the near
talk about some examples of in the near
talk about some examples of in the near future now women being involved in the
future now women being involved in the
future now women being involved in the political process when we’re being
political process when we’re being
political process when we’re being involved in the peace building process
involved in the peace building process
involved in the peace building process is nothing new it’s actually we have
is nothing new it’s actually we have
is nothing new it’s actually we have some examples here from Kurdistan for
some examples here from Kurdistan for
some examples here from Kurdistan for example during the 1990s when there was
example during the 1990s when there was
example during the 1990s when there was the civil war the women marched from
the civil war the women marched from
the civil war the women marched from Slimani all the way to Erbil and they
Slimani all the way to Erbil and they
Slimani all the way to Erbil and they had a sit-in at Parliament now
had a sit-in at Parliament now
had a sit-in at Parliament now unfortunately they did not stop the war
unfortunately they did not stop the war
unfortunately they did not stop the war but they definitely pushed us for a
but they definitely pushed us for a
but they definitely pushed us for a ceasefire to be implemented and we
ceasefire to be implemented and we
ceasefire to be implemented and we actually have some live examples sitting
actually have some live examples sitting
actually have some live examples sitting with us here in this room today and I’m
with us here in this room today and I’m
with us here in this room today and I’m very proud that we have them here I also
very proud that we have them here I also
very proud that we have them here I also want to talk about the sex strike in
want to talk about the sex strike in
want to talk about the sex strike in 2003 in Liberia
2003 in Liberia
2003 in Liberia in Liberia country at war the Muslim and
in Liberia country at war the Muslim and
in Liberia country at war the Muslim and Christian women came together and they
Christian women came together and they
Christian women came together and they started the white t-shirt campaign where
started the white t-shirt campaign where
started the white t-shirt campaign where they decided that they wanted to stop
they decided that they wanted to stop
they decided that they wanted to stop stop the war and they said enough for
stop the war and they said enough for
stop the war and they said enough for the violence they stopped having sex
the violence they stopped having sex
the violence they stopped having sex with their partners and they said we
with their partners and they said we
with their partners and they said we will not be with you unless you stop the
will not be with you unless you stop the
will not be with you unless you stop the war and this continued on again until
war and this continued on again until
war and this continued on again until they pushed for a ceasefire and then
they pushed for a ceasefire and then
they pushed for a ceasefire and then they pushed the different sides to
they pushed the different sides to
they pushed the different sides to actually sit at the negotiations tables
actually sit at the negotiations tables
actually sit at the negotiations tables but they were smart about it what did
but they were smart about it what did
but they were smart about it what did the women do they didn’t just stop at
the women do they didn’t just stop at
the women do they didn’t just stop at them going and sitting at the
them going and sitting at the
them going and sitting at the negotiations tables 200 women came
negotiations tables 200 women came
negotiations tables 200 women came together and they barricaded the meeting
together and they barricaded the meeting
together and they barricaded the meeting room not allowing anybody to leave until
room not allowing anybody to leave until
room not allowing anybody to leave until they actually come to agreement some men
they actually come to agreement some men
they actually come to agreement some men actually tries to jump out of the window
actually tries to jump out of the window
actually tries to jump out of the window but the women threatened them that they
but the women threatened them that they
but the women threatened them that they were actually going to strip off their
were actually going to strip off their
were actually going to strip off their clothes and go naked and let the media
clothes and go naked and let the media
clothes and go naked and let the media take pictures so they were forced to go
take pictures so they were forced to go
take pictures so they were forced to go back in and they actually were able to
back in and they actually were able to
back in and they actually were able to come out with an agreement I also want
come out with an agreement I also want
come out with an agreement I also want to talk about another example that I was
to talk about another example that I was
to talk about another example that I was actually very very proud and honored to
actually very very proud and honored to
actually very very proud and honored to be a part of and that’s the ash T
be a part of and that’s the ash T
be a part of and that’s the ash T women’s group that was he that was
women’s group that was he that was
women’s group that was he that was formed in 2011 here in Kurdistan a group
formed in 2011 here in Kurdistan a group
formed in 2011 here in Kurdistan a group of us pradesh women came together
of us pradesh women came together
of us pradesh women came together actually Kurdish could the Stanny women
actually Kurdish could the Stanny women
actually Kurdish could the Stanny women not just British women but from all
not just British women but from all
not just British women but from all different factions as well we came from
different factions as well we came from
different factions as well we came from different political backgrounds
different political backgrounds
different political backgrounds different ideologies different even ways
different ideologies different even ways
different ideologies different even ways of life but we shed all of this because
of life but we shed all of this because
of life but we shed all of this because we shared one common goal and that goal
we shared one common goal and that goal
we shared one common goal and that goal was peace and Kurdistan we decided that
was peace and Kurdistan we decided that
was peace and Kurdistan we decided that it was very important that we have to go
it was very important that we have to go
it was very important that we have to go and talk to the different factions that
and talk to the different factions that
and talk to the different factions that are fighting together because we knew
are fighting together because we knew
are fighting together because we knew that there sitting too with each other
that there sitting too with each other
that there sitting too with each other they were listening but they’re not
they were listening but they’re not
they were listening but they’re not hearing each other what did we do we
hearing each other what did we do we
hearing each other what did we do we actually met with all the different
actually met with all the different
actually met with all the different fractions that were involved in the
fractions that were involved in the
fractions that were involved in the unrest in 2011 we took all their
unrest in 2011 we took all their
unrest in 2011 we took all their projects all their proposals and we sat
projects all their proposals and we sat
projects all their proposals and we sat down in a couple of days at a friend’s
down in a couple of days at a friend’s
down in a couple of days at a friend’s office and we compiled them together
office and we compiled them together
office and we compiled them together there were only three points of
there were only three points of
there were only three points of contention three and the men kept on
contention three and the men kept on
contention three and the men kept on saying oh we cannot sit because there’s
saying oh we cannot sit because there’s
saying oh we cannot sit because there’s a forty point of forty point
a forty point of forty point
a forty point of forty point Tyr sixty point project there but it was
Tyr sixty point project there but it was
Tyr sixty point project there but it was three and then when we told them this we
three and then when we told them this we
three and then when we told them this we were actually able to get the men to sit
were actually able to get the men to sit
were actually able to get the men to sit at the table and start negotiating now
at the table and start negotiating now
at the table and start negotiating now unfortunately we did not get a seat at
unfortunately we did not get a seat at
unfortunately we did not get a seat at the table but nevertheless it’s
the table but nevertheless it’s
the table but nevertheless it’s important that we tried for the piece
important that we tried for the piece
important that we tried for the piece and were able to maintain the peace in
and were able to maintain the peace in
and were able to maintain the peace in Kurdistan so how we should all do it the
Kurdistan so how we should all do it the
Kurdistan so how we should all do it the way I can tell you from my experience
way I can tell you from my experience
way I can tell you from my experience and I’m going to be very quick here it’s
and I’m going to be very quick here it’s
and I’m going to be very quick here it’s very important if you have a vision if
very important if you have a vision if
very important if you have a vision if you have an idea to start small you
you have an idea to start small you
you have an idea to start small you start at home you start within your
start at home you start within your
start at home you start within your community you start within your school
community you start within your school
community you start within your school you start within your family and then
you start within your family and then
you start within your family and then you try and sell that idea and then you
you try and sell that idea and then you
you try and sell that idea and then you get buy-in from everybody from your
get buy-in from everybody from your
get buy-in from everybody from your community just because we’re fighting
community just because we’re fighting
community just because we’re fighting for women’s rights or women’s
for women’s rights or women’s
for women’s rights or women’s participation it doesn’t mean that it’s
participation it doesn’t mean that it’s
participation it doesn’t mean that it’s only our job to do so everybody must
only our job to do so everybody must
only our job to do so everybody must actually participate in it whether
actually participate in it whether
actually participate in it whether they’re men women children old young
they’re men women children old young
they’re men women children old young everybody must participate because as
everybody must participate because as
everybody must participate because as Hillary Clinton says women’s rights are
Hillary Clinton says women’s rights are
Hillary Clinton says women’s rights are human rights and of course it’s very
human rights and of course it’s very
human rights and of course it’s very important that you actually utilize all
important that you actually utilize all
important that you actually utilize all the of the tools that are in front of
the of the tools that are in front of
the of the tools that are in front of you whether it’s the media the social
you whether it’s the media the social
you whether it’s the media the social media whether it’s group meetings
media whether it’s group meetings
media whether it’s group meetings whether it’s actually doing lobbying
whether it’s actually doing lobbying
whether it’s actually doing lobbying with your local officials whether you’re
with your local officials whether you’re
with your local officials whether you’re meeting your elected officials these are
meeting your elected officials these are
meeting your elected officials these are all tools that you can utilize to try
all tools that you can utilize to try
all tools that you can utilize to try and push your vision and to try and push
and push your vision and to try and push
and push your vision and to try and push your want and of course there are you
your want and of course there are you
your want and of course there are you international mechanisms to promote the
international mechanisms to promote the
international mechanisms to promote the participation of women and peacebuilding
participation of women and peacebuilding
participation of women and peacebuilding let’s not forget those it’s very
let’s not forget those it’s very
let’s not forget those it’s very important that we actually it’s a it’s a
important that we actually it’s a it’s a
important that we actually it’s a it’s a good it’s a very good lobbying tool and
good it’s a very good lobbying tool and
good it’s a very good lobbying tool and we can actually hold our government
we can actually hold our government
we can actually hold our government accountable if they do not allow for me
accountable if they do not allow for me
accountable if they do not allow for me to participate and closing ladies and
to participate and closing ladies and
to participate and closing ladies and gentlemen let’s go out and wage the
gentlemen let’s go out and wage the
gentlemen let’s go out and wage the piece thank you
”
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