[Music] so I’ve always said that I wasn’t going
so I’ve always said that I wasn’t going
so I’ve always said that I wasn’t going to start a poem with an introduction but
to start a poem with an introduction but
to start a poem with an introduction but hi my name is area where I’m 18 years
hi my name is area where I’m 18 years
hi my name is area where I’m 18 years old and from the first time I heard that
old and from the first time I heard that
old and from the first time I heard that I was going to be speaking I’ve been
I was going to be speaking I’ve been
I was going to be speaking I’ve been racking my brain trying to figure out
racking my brain trying to figure out
racking my brain trying to figure out how to put a salt obsession and
how to put a salt obsession and
how to put a salt obsession and self-hatred into words so forgive me for
self-hatred into words so forgive me for
self-hatred into words so forgive me for the paper but this is a very new piece
the paper but this is a very new piece
the paper but this is a very new piece for me and it’s too important to mess up
for me and it’s too important to mess up
for me and it’s too important to mess up you are unclean but you will be wholly
you are unclean but you will be wholly
you are unclean but you will be wholly baptized in the water of womanhood so
baptized in the water of womanhood so
baptized in the water of womanhood so thick so measured you will no longer
thick so measured you will no longer
thick so measured you will no longer remember your time before it you are a
remember your time before it you are a
remember your time before it you are a girl you do not understand when the line
girl you do not understand when the line
girl you do not understand when the line blurs and can finally crush your open
blurs and can finally crush your open
blurs and can finally crush your open lips as woman you are not sure if you
lips as woman you are not sure if you
lips as woman you are not sure if you would like to cross that line not sure
would like to cross that line not sure
would like to cross that line not sure if the label fits your tongue if you can
if the label fits your tongue if you can
if the label fits your tongue if you can swallow it whole let it rest inside your
swallow it whole let it rest inside your
swallow it whole let it rest inside your belly we teach young women to look
belly we teach young women to look
belly we teach young women to look towards everyone but themselves for
towards everyone but themselves for
towards everyone but themselves for self-worth so when your first boyfriend
self-worth so when your first boyfriend
self-worth so when your first boyfriend asks you why you are distant you will
asks you why you are distant you will
asks you why you are distant you will say that you cannot love him because you
say that you cannot love him because you
say that you cannot love him because you do not love yourself you tell this to
do not love yourself you tell this to
do not love yourself you tell this to the second his name is mirror he does
the second his name is mirror he does
the second his name is mirror he does not agree with you but that is only
not agree with you but that is only
not agree with you but that is only because he is guilty on all counts he
because he is guilty on all counts he
because he is guilty on all counts he has snatched out your vocal chords every
has snatched out your vocal chords every
has snatched out your vocal chords every morning he slips a scale underneath your
morning he slips a scale underneath your
morning he slips a scale underneath your feet and that every night he feeds you
feet and that every night he feeds you
feet and that every night he feeds you fat he likes to keep you in this
fat he likes to keep you in this
fat he likes to keep you in this perpetual circle of hatred until your
perpetual circle of hatred until your
perpetual circle of hatred until your name is if you could only lose one more
name is if you could only lose one more
name is if you could only lose one more pound the third asks what does it feel
pound the third asks what does it feel
pound the third asks what does it feel like to be full of so much hate you say
like to be full of so much hate you say
like to be full of so much hate you say it is like a war that you never win my
it is like a war that you never win my
it is like a war that you never win my mother and father taught me better than
mother and father taught me better than
mother and father taught me better than this but that girl in the picture the
this but that girl in the picture the
this but that girl in the picture the one whose skin is lighter than mine the
one whose skin is lighter than mine the
one whose skin is lighter than mine the one whose body is thinner than mine she
one whose body is thinner than mine she
one whose body is thinner than mine she is who I have been taught to want to be
is who I have been taught to want to be
is who I have been taught to want to be your fourth boyfriend will not be your
your fourth boyfriend will not be your
your fourth boyfriend will not be your boyfriend at all but a man who has
boyfriend at all but a man who has
boyfriend at all but a man who has decided that to defile is to be a martyr
decided that to defile is to be a martyr
decided that to defile is to be a martyr for full male masculinity he will grab
for full male masculinity he will grab
for full male masculinity he will grab you by the waist and say that you asked
you by the waist and say that you asked
you by the waist and say that you asked for it this is not what you agreed to
for it this is not what you agreed to
for it this is not what you agreed to when you let yourself go to the waters
when you let yourself go to the waters
when you let yourself go to the waters hands on your neck you are unclean you
hands on your neck you are unclean you
hands on your neck you are unclean you are a woman you are walking home from a
are a woman you are walking home from a
are a woman you are walking home from a party fingers hovering over your iPhone
party fingers hovering over your iPhone
party fingers hovering over your iPhone screen already dialed to 9-1-1 this is
screen already dialed to 9-1-1 this is
screen already dialed to 9-1-1 this is what they said would work but in the
what they said would work but in the
what they said would work but in the moment you are not quick enough this is
moment you are not quick enough this is
moment you are not quick enough this is not what you agreed to
not what you agreed to
not what you agreed to you are unclean when you are finally
you are unclean when you are finally
you are unclean when you are finally willing to speak instead of asking about
willing to speak instead of asking about
willing to speak instead of asking about the boys name they will ask for the
the boys name they will ask for the
the boys name they will ask for the number of his football jersey on
number of his football jersey on
number of his football jersey on television you are raped again and again
television you are raped again and again
television you are raped again and again and blamed in the same sentence your
and blamed in the same sentence your
and blamed in the same sentence your skirt was three inches too short you
skirt was three inches too short you
skirt was three inches too short you shouldn’t have walked home alone it was
shouldn’t have walked home alone it was
shouldn’t have walked home alone it was your fault it is all your fault but the
your fault it is all your fault but the
your fault it is all your fault but the boy who assaulted you can’t sleep and
boy who assaulted you can’t sleep and
boy who assaulted you can’t sleep and eat his steak in peace but you can’t
eat his steak in peace but you can’t
eat his steak in peace but you can’t sleep and eat either not after the idea
sleep and eat either not after the idea
sleep and eat either not after the idea of you something so intimate has run off
of you something so intimate has run off
of you something so intimate has run off lost and will not come back but boys
lost and will not come back but boys
lost and will not come back but boys will be boys college security will be
will be boys college security will be
will be boys college security will be launching a formal investigation
launching a formal investigation
launching a formal investigation he is so sorry well you are sorry too
he is so sorry well you are sorry too
he is so sorry well you are sorry too you are sorry that colleges raise money
you are sorry that colleges raise money
you are sorry that colleges raise money for self-defense classes instead of a
for self-defense classes instead of a
for self-defense classes instead of a class called you do not own this body
class called you do not own this body
class called you do not own this body you are sorry that we teach young men
you are sorry that we teach young men
you are sorry that we teach young men unaccountability that disrespecting
unaccountability that disrespecting
unaccountability that disrespecting women is manliness at its fullest
women is manliness at its fullest
women is manliness at its fullest potential if you are heavier curvy and
potential if you are heavier curvy and
potential if you are heavier curvy and have a big butt you are fat on your walk
have a big butt you are fat on your walk
have a big butt you are fat on your walk home your whistled at if you are
home your whistled at if you are
home your whistled at if you are comfortable with your sexuality you are
comfortable with your sexuality you are
comfortable with your sexuality you are a and if you don’t know how to
a and if you don’t know how to
a and if you don’t know how to please a man
please a man
please a man you are not knowledgeable enough if you
you are not knowledgeable enough if you
you are not knowledgeable enough if you wear no makeup you should try to dress
wear no makeup you should try to dress
wear no makeup you should try to dress up and if you’re wearing any you are
up and if you’re wearing any you are
up and if you’re wearing any you are wearing too much you are shoulders are
wearing too much you are shoulders are
wearing too much you are shoulders are not in the dress code put on a sweater
not in the dress code put on a sweater
not in the dress code put on a sweater you are hey girl what’s your name your
you are hey girl what’s your name your
you are hey girl what’s your name your body is a shackled shrine that millions
body is a shackled shrine that millions
body is a shackled shrine that millions pray to but never give back Oh Goddess
pray to but never give back Oh Goddess
pray to but never give back Oh Goddess hear my prayer they say I will baptize
hear my prayer they say I will baptize
hear my prayer they say I will baptize myself for you you have made nations I
myself for you you have made nations I
myself for you you have made nations I am your son and your daughter and still
am your son and your daughter and still
am your son and your daughter and still they take so tell them I do not want
they take so tell them I do not want
they take so tell them I do not want your clean nor your holy I will not dip
your clean nor your holy I will not dip
your clean nor your holy I will not dip my head inside of water tainted by a
my head inside of water tainted by a
my head inside of water tainted by a sword of anger that cannot be written
sword of anger that cannot be written
sword of anger that cannot be written about it is the knowledge that you have
about it is the knowledge that you have
about it is the knowledge that you have been born in a world that will hate you
been born in a world that will hate you
been born in a world that will hate you for everything that creates you it is
for everything that creates you it is
for everything that creates you it is the day you realize that you also
the day you realize that you also
the day you realize that you also believe it tell them
believe it tell them
believe it tell them I will not be your sacrifice America
I will not be your sacrifice America
I will not be your sacrifice America continues to act as if feminism is so
continues to act as if feminism is so
continues to act as if feminism is so radical when this entire country
radical when this entire country
radical when this entire country relocated enslaved and murdered millions
relocated enslaved and murdered millions
relocated enslaved and murdered millions America acts as if our rape culture is a
America acts as if our rape culture is a
America acts as if our rape culture is a side effect as if our girls self-esteem
side effect as if our girls self-esteem
side effect as if our girls self-esteem problems are a side effect as if teen
problems are a side effect as if teen
problems are a side effect as if teen pregnancy is a side effect as if women’s
pregnancy is a side effect as if women’s
pregnancy is a side effect as if women’s issues are just side effects as if
issues are just side effects as if
issues are just side effects as if violent men are side effects as if women
violent men are side effects as if women
violent men are side effects as if women are always meant to be just on the side
are always meant to be just on the side
are always meant to be just on the side so tell them you do not own this body
so tell them you do not own this body
so tell them you do not own this body [Applause]
”
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