I’d like to take a minute at the top of this talk to ask you to think about an
this talk to ask you to think about an
this talk to ask you to think about an opportunity that you have not taken or a
opportunity that you have not taken or a
opportunity that you have not taken or a goal that you haven’t started working on
you have it so why haven’t you started
you have it so why haven’t you started working towards that have you been
working towards that have you been
working towards that have you been thinking that right now just isn’t the
thinking that right now just isn’t the
thinking that right now just isn’t the right time and if you have been thinking
right time and if you have been thinking
right time and if you have been thinking that are you thinking that tomorrow or
that are you thinking that tomorrow or
that are you thinking that tomorrow or maybe next year will be the time that
maybe next year will be the time that
maybe next year will be the time that you’re going to get started since I
you’re going to get started since I
you’re going to get started since I can’t go around the room and ask all of
can’t go around the room and ask all of
can’t go around the room and ask all of these people they are own answers to
these people they are own answers to
these people they are own answers to this question I’ll give you an example
this question I’ll give you an example
this question I’ll give you an example from my life when I was coming out here
from my life when I was coming out here
from my life when I was coming out here to Shanghai it was arguably a really bad
to Shanghai it was arguably a really bad
to Shanghai it was arguably a really bad time to be doing it I had just given
time to be doing it I had just given
time to be doing it I had just given birth to my second baby in three years
birth to my second baby in three years
birth to my second baby in three years and my husband could not work here in
and my husband could not work here in
and my husband could not work here in China the idea of coming out here and
China the idea of coming out here and
China the idea of coming out here and being basically a single mom just really
being basically a single mom just really
being basically a single mom just really didn’t appeal to me but the job oh my
didn’t appeal to me but the job oh my
didn’t appeal to me but the job oh my gosh the job was a chance of a lifetime
gosh the job was a chance of a lifetime
gosh the job was a chance of a lifetime I could lead early on in my career I had
I could lead early on in my career I had
I could lead early on in my career I had a chance to have an influence on one of
a chance to have an influence on one of
a chance to have an influence on one of the most important international
the most important international
the most important international relationships in the world and so we
relationships in the world and so we
relationships in the world and so we decided that I just could not pass it up
decided that I just could not pass it up
decided that I just could not pass it up my husband found a job as close as he
my husband found a job as close as he
my husband found a job as close as he could get and my kids well I got a lot
could get and my kids well I got a lot
could get and my kids well I got a lot of help with taking care of my kids so
of help with taking care of my kids so
of help with taking care of my kids so that’s what I want to talk to you about
that’s what I want to talk to you about
that’s what I want to talk to you about today I want to make sure that people
today I want to make sure that people
today I want to make sure that people think about the fact that there is never
think about the fact that there is never
think about the fact that there is never a perfect time generally when people say
a perfect time generally when people say
a perfect time generally when people say something isn’t right that the time
something isn’t right that the time
something isn’t right that the time isn’t right what they’re talking about
isn’t right what they’re talking about
isn’t right what they’re talking about is that they have barriers but when you
is that they have barriers but when you
is that they have barriers but when you say oh the time just isn’t right it
say oh the time just isn’t right it
say oh the time just isn’t right it makes it a lot easier to ignore those
makes it a lot easier to ignore those
makes it a lot easier to ignore those things that you want to do
things that you want to do
things that you want to do so confession time how many of you have
so confession time how many of you have
so confession time how many of you have used excuses like well you know I’d love
used excuses like well you know I’d love
used excuses like well you know I’d love to do that but I have small kids or I’d
to do that but I have small kids or I’d
to do that but I have small kids or I’d love to do that but I’m really busy
love to do that but I’m really busy
love to do that but I’m really busy right now or my mom tells me that this
right now or my mom tells me that this
right now or my mom tells me that this isn’t a good time to do this I know that
isn’t a good time to do this I know that
isn’t a good time to do this I know that I have and so I want to make sure that I
I have and so I want to make sure that I
I have and so I want to make sure that I tell you some stories today that
tell you some stories today that
tell you some stories today that hopefully will make you go out there and
hopefully will make you go out there and
hopefully will make you go out there and decide that you really want to do these
decide that you really want to do these
decide that you really want to do these things and when you face those barriers
things and when you face those barriers
things and when you face those barriers I want you to use your courage and your
I want you to use your courage and your
I want you to use your courage and your perseverance and your creativity to
perseverance and your creativity to
perseverance and your creativity to overcome any barriers you come across
overcome any barriers you come across
overcome any barriers you come across I’ve come across the stories that I’m
I’ve come across the stories that I’m
I’ve come across the stories that I’m going to tell you during a 17-year
going to tell you during a 17-year
going to tell you during a 17-year career as a diplomat this is me 17 years
career as a diplomat this is me 17 years
career as a diplomat this is me 17 years ago wearing black and white again that
ago wearing black and white again that
ago wearing black and white again that that wasn’t actually a plan and so I
that wasn’t actually a plan and so I
that wasn’t actually a plan and so I have this really great really cool job I
have this really great really cool job I
have this really great really cool job I get to move around the world I get to
get to move around the world I get to
get to move around the world I get to see these places that you read about in
see these places that you read about in
see these places that you read about in the news so I’ve been to Kabul and I’ve
the news so I’ve been to Kabul and I’ve
the news so I’ve been to Kabul and I’ve been to Baghdad and I’ve worked in the
been to Baghdad and I’ve worked in the
been to Baghdad and I’ve worked in the White House and it’s really been an
White House and it’s really been an
White House and it’s really been an amazing experience and one of the things
amazing experience and one of the things
amazing experience and one of the things I do for my job is I go out and I talk
I do for my job is I go out and I talk
I do for my job is I go out and I talk about American values and American
about American values and American
about American values and American policies with all sorts of people so I
policies with all sorts of people so I
policies with all sorts of people so I get to meet students and I get to meet
get to meet students and I get to meet
get to meet students and I get to meet refugees and I get to meet business
refugees and I get to meet business
refugees and I get to meet business people and government people and you
people and government people and you
people and government people and you know what the most successful people
know what the most successful people
know what the most successful people I’ve ever met all have a story about
I’ve ever met all have a story about
I’ve ever met all have a story about overcoming a barrier that you could say
overcoming a barrier that you could say
overcoming a barrier that you could say was in perfect timing take motherhood
was in perfect timing take motherhood
was in perfect timing take motherhood for example there are a lot of people
for example there are a lot of people
for example there are a lot of people who are going to tell you that being a
who are going to tell you that being a
who are going to tell you that being a mother means that you can’t take
mother means that you can’t take
mother means that you can’t take whatever opportunity in your life I want
whatever opportunity in your life I want
whatever opportunity in your life I want to tell you about somebody who has taken
to tell you about somebody who has taken
to tell you about somebody who has taken motherhood who is a single mother in
motherhood who is a single mother in
motherhood who is a single mother in fact and who has an incredibly
fact and who has an incredibly
fact and who has an incredibly high-powered job this woman not only
high-powered job this woman not only
high-powered job this woman not only managed to figure out how she was going
managed to figure out how she was going
managed to figure out how she was going to spend time with her daughter
to spend time with her daughter
to spend time with her daughter she also worked out a way to pay it
she also worked out a way to pay it
she also worked out a way to pay it forward to the people who work for her
forward to the people who work for her
forward to the people who work for her so she decided that every Sunday she
so she decided that every Sunday she
so she decided that every Sunday she would not work she would spend that time
would not work she would spend that time
would not work she would spend that time with her daughter and when people came
with her daughter and when people came
with her daughter and when people came to her concerned about taking jobs in
to her concerned about taking jobs in
to her concerned about taking jobs in her organization because they thought
her organization because they thought
her organization because they thought they wouldn’t be able to be there for
they wouldn’t be able to be there for
they wouldn’t be able to be there for her kids she worked out a way to help
her kids she worked out a way to help
her kids she worked out a way to help them not only do the job but also to
them not only do the job but also to
them not only do the job but also to spend time with their kids when their
spend time with their kids when their
spend time with their kids when their kids had important things going on in
kids had important things going on in
kids had important things going on in their lives I think this last point is
their lives I think this last point is
their lives I think this last point is very important you’ll notice I didn’t
very important you’ll notice I didn’t
very important you’ll notice I didn’t say she worked out a way to find
say she worked out a way to find
say she worked out a way to find work/life balance there are a lot of
work/life balance there are a lot of
work/life balance there are a lot of things that you will have to sacrifice
things that you will have to sacrifice
things that you will have to sacrifice on the road to goals but my point today
on the road to goals but my point today
on the road to goals but my point today is that I want you to decide what you
is that I want you to decide what you
is that I want you to decide what you really want and have the courage to go
really want and have the courage to go
really want and have the courage to go out and get them this woman who by the
out and get them this woman who by the
out and get them this woman who by the way is Valerie Jarrett the special
way is Valerie Jarrett the special
way is Valerie Jarrett the special advisor to the President of the United
advisor to the President of the United
advisor to the President of the United States had the courage to tell the
States had the courage to tell the
States had the courage to tell the President of the United States look I
President of the United States look I
President of the United States look I need sunday off I just I need to spend
need sunday off I just I need to spend
need sunday off I just I need to spend it with my daughter if she can do that
it with my daughter if she can do that
it with my daughter if she can do that then I think all of us in this room can
then I think all of us in this room can
then I think all of us in this room can find the courage to ask for what we need
find the courage to ask for what we need
find the courage to ask for what we need to make it to our goals now you may be
to make it to our goals now you may be
to make it to our goals now you may be thinking now well when that’s all very
thinking now well when that’s all very
thinking now well when that’s all very well and good look you’re a mid career
well and good look you’re a mid career
well and good look you’re a mid career diplomat Valerie Jarrett is a very
diplomat Valerie Jarrett is a very
diplomat Valerie Jarrett is a very powerful woman but what about me I don’t
powerful woman but what about me I don’t
powerful woman but what about me I don’t have power I’m early on in my career I
have power I’m early on in my career I
have power I’m early on in my career I want to tell you that this is possible
want to tell you that this is possible
want to tell you that this is possible for everybody I want to tell you a story
for everybody I want to tell you a story
for everybody I want to tell you a story about a woman I met when I was serving
about a woman I met when I was serving
about a woman I met when I was serving in Alexandria Egypt she was an amazing
in Alexandria Egypt she was an amazing
in Alexandria Egypt she was an amazing woman she was a high school student who
woman she was a high school student who
woman she was a high school student who had great grades who had great English
had great grades who had great English
had great grades who had great English and even more important was a really
and even more important was a really
and even more important was a really great person and who gave back to her
great person and who gave back to her
great person and who gave back to her community through volunteering this
community through volunteering this
community through volunteering this woman made it into Harvard University it
woman made it into Harvard University it
woman made it into Harvard University it was something that most of her friends
was something that most of her friends
was something that most of her friends couldn’t even dream of and you might
couldn’t even dream of and you might
couldn’t even dream of and you might think that was where the story ended but
think that was where the story ended but
think that was where the story ended but she living in
she living in
she living in via Egypt where frankly families were
via Egypt where frankly families were
via Egypt where frankly families were not really sure that they wanted to send
not really sure that they wanted to send
not really sure that they wanted to send their especially their girls to the
their especially their girls to the
their especially their girls to the United States because they were afraid
United States because they were afraid
United States because they were afraid they would be morally corrupted there
they would be morally corrupted there
they would be morally corrupted there this was such a trend that many American
this was such a trend that many American
this was such a trend that many American universities were starting up campuses
universities were starting up campuses
universities were starting up campuses in Dubai so that parents from the Middle
in Dubai so that parents from the Middle
in Dubai so that parents from the Middle East could send their girls to a place
East could send their girls to a place
East could send their girls to a place where at least they knew the society had
where at least they knew the society had
where at least they knew the society had the same values as the parents did but
the same values as the parents did but
the same values as the parents did but Harvard doesn’t have a campus in Dubai
Harvard doesn’t have a campus in Dubai
Harvard doesn’t have a campus in Dubai and this woman knew that she really
and this woman knew that she really
and this woman knew that she really couldn’t afford to wait for attitudes
couldn’t afford to wait for attitudes
couldn’t afford to wait for attitudes towards going to the United States to
towards going to the United States to
towards going to the United States to change so she had to change her parents
change so she had to change her parents
change so she had to change her parents minds she had to change the community’s
minds she had to change the community’s
minds she had to change the community’s minds and she managed to do that and she
minds and she managed to do that and she
minds and she managed to do that and she went to Harvard again you might think
went to Harvard again you might think
went to Harvard again you might think that was the end of the story but when
that was the end of the story but when
that was the end of the story but when she got to Boston just as her parents
she got to Boston just as her parents
she got to Boston just as her parents had predicted she was miserable she ran
had predicted she was miserable she ran
had predicted she was miserable she ran into a lot of women who were dressed
into a lot of women who were dressed
into a lot of women who were dressed sort of like me and in the Middle East
sort of like me and in the Middle East
sort of like me and in the Middle East if you’re dressed like this this would
if you’re dressed like this this would
if you’re dressed like this this would be like wearing my bikini up on stage
be like wearing my bikini up on stage
be like wearing my bikini up on stage which thankfully for all of us I chose
which thankfully for all of us I chose
which thankfully for all of us I chose not to do she also had trouble because
not to do she also had trouble because
not to do she also had trouble because she had all of these brilliant
she had all of these brilliant
she had all of these brilliant classmates who were talking about topics
classmates who were talking about topics
classmates who were talking about topics she had never heard of before because
she had never heard of before because
she had never heard of before because she had lived a very very sort of a
she had lived a very very sort of a
she had lived a very very sort of a sheltered life up until then and
sheltered life up until then and
sheltered life up until then and probably the worst part was that it was
probably the worst part was that it was
probably the worst part was that it was difficult for her to find things to eat
difficult for her to find things to eat
difficult for her to find things to eat because she was Muslim and she needed to
because she was Muslim and she needed to
because she was Muslim and she needed to find halal food but she persevered she
find halal food but she persevered she
find halal food but she persevered she made her way to the second term she
made her way to the second term she
made her way to the second term she found friends who helped her navigate
found friends who helped her navigate
found friends who helped her navigate her way through this experience and in
her way through this experience and in
her way through this experience and in the end she graduated with honors from
the end she graduated with honors from
the end she graduated with honors from Harvard now I don’t know what she’s
Harvard now I don’t know what she’s
Harvard now I don’t know what she’s going to do with her life because her
going to do with her life because her
going to do with her life because her graduation is pretty recent but I know
graduation is pretty recent but I know
graduation is pretty recent but I know she’s going to go out there
she’s going to go out there
she’s going to go out there and she’s going to bring people together
and she’s going to bring people together
and she’s going to bring people together because that’s the sort of person she is
because that’s the sort of person she is
because that’s the sort of person she is and when I have a time when I think I’ve
and when I have a time when I think I’ve
and when I have a time when I think I’ve run into a terrible day or a terrible
run into a terrible day or a terrible
run into a terrible day or a terrible month or a terrible year I think about
month or a terrible year I think about
month or a terrible year I think about her and I realize that I can persevere
her and I realize that I can persevere
her and I realize that I can persevere and get through this difficult period
and get through this difficult period
and get through this difficult period there are women in the world who you
there are women in the world who you
there are women in the world who you could argue their entire lives are a
could argue their entire lives are a
could argue their entire lives are a difficult period take for instance the
difficult period take for instance the
difficult period take for instance the women I worked with in Afghanistan these
women I worked with in Afghanistan these
women I worked with in Afghanistan these women were refugees so not only were
women were refugees so not only were
women were refugees so not only were they dealing with the fact that their
they dealing with the fact that their
they dealing with the fact that their society saw them as second-class
society saw them as second-class
society saw them as second-class citizens they were also very poor and
citizens they were also very poor and
citizens they were also very poor and they were returning back to a country
they were returning back to a country
they were returning back to a country that they hadn’t lived in for years
that they hadn’t lived in for years
that they hadn’t lived in for years sometimes even decades against this
sometimes even decades against this
sometimes even decades against this backdrop we started offering programs
backdrop we started offering programs
backdrop we started offering programs for women to teach them how to make a
for women to teach them how to make a
for women to teach them how to make a little bit of money so that they could
little bit of money so that they could
little bit of money so that they could raise their status in the household in
raise their status in the household in
raise their status in the household in addition we also taught them other
addition we also taught them other
addition we also taught them other skills now these women could have stayed
skills now these women could have stayed
skills now these women could have stayed home they could have continued to walk
home they could have continued to walk
home they could have continued to walk two kilometres to get dirty water and
two kilometres to get dirty water and
two kilometres to get dirty water and let their husbands speak for them and
let their husbands speak for them and
let their husbands speak for them and spent their lives living the status quo
spent their lives living the status quo
spent their lives living the status quo but they didn’t they came to these
but they didn’t they came to these
but they didn’t they came to these programs and some of them found making a
programs and some of them found making a
programs and some of them found making a little bit of money was enough and some
little bit of money was enough and some
little bit of money was enough and some of them were very excited about the
of them were very excited about the
of them were very excited about the other things we were teaching bear in
other things we were teaching bear in
other things we were teaching bear in mind that Afghanistan is one of those
mind that Afghanistan is one of those
mind that Afghanistan is one of those places where one in ten children will
places where one in ten children will
places where one in ten children will die before the age of ten of diseases
die before the age of ten of diseases
die before the age of ten of diseases that are preventable by very simple
that are preventable by very simple
that are preventable by very simple methods one of the things we did in one
methods one of the things we did in one
methods one of the things we did in one of our programs was to teach women how
of our programs was to teach women how
of our programs was to teach women how to strain and boil water one of the
to strain and boil water one of the
to strain and boil water one of the women went home to tell her husband very
women went home to tell her husband very
women went home to tell her husband very excitedly about what she’d learned that
excitedly about what she’d learned that
excitedly about what she’d learned that day and her husband said what what are
day and her husband said what what are
day and her husband said what what are you talking about you’re listening to
you talking about you’re listening to
you talking about you’re listening to these foreigners you’re wasting your
these foreigners you’re wasting your
these foreigners you’re wasting your time what are you doing and so this
time what are you doing and so this
time what are you doing and so this woman could have decided okay well you
woman could have decided okay well you
woman could have decided okay well you know my husband doesn’t want me to do
know my husband doesn’t want me to do
know my husband doesn’t want me to do this
this
this but she didn’t want to wait until one of
but she didn’t want to wait until one of
but she didn’t want to wait until one of her kids got sick to tell him see I told
her kids got sick to tell him see I told
her kids got sick to tell him see I told you so she wanted to change their lives
you so she wanted to change their lives
you so she wanted to change their lives right then so what she did was she went
right then so what she did was she went
right then so what she did was she went down to the river and she got a glass of
down to the river and she got a glass of
down to the river and she got a glass of the water there it looked kind of like
the water there it looked kind of like
the water there it looked kind of like this it was brown it had things floating
this it was brown it had things floating
this it was brown it had things floating in it and she presented her husband with
in it and she presented her husband with
in it and she presented her husband with a glass with the river water and a glass
a glass with the river water and a glass
a glass with the river water and a glass with treated water and she asked him
with treated water and she asked him
with treated water and she asked him which of these would you like to drink
which of these would you like to drink
which of these would you like to drink he told me from that day forward he
he told me from that day forward he
he told me from that day forward he never again criticized her for doing the
never again criticized her for doing the
never again criticized her for doing the straining and the boiling and as a
straining and the boiling and as a
straining and the boiling and as a result her family’s life got better and
result her family’s life got better and
result her family’s life got better and her family’s health got better now I
her family’s health got better now I
her family’s health got better now I think this kind of creative framing of a
think this kind of creative framing of a
think this kind of creative framing of a problem is something we could probably
problem is something we could probably
problem is something we could probably all learn something from but it is one
all learn something from but it is one
all learn something from but it is one of those things that is also very very
of those things that is also very very
of those things that is also very very extreme I understand that most of us in
extreme I understand that most of us in
extreme I understand that most of us in this room do not have to walk many many
this room do not have to walk many many
this room do not have to walk many many hours to get water and we don’t get
hours to get water and we don’t get
hours to get water and we don’t get dirty water when we go there but I bring
dirty water when we go there but I bring
dirty water when we go there but I bring up the point because I want us to
up the point because I want us to
up the point because I want us to remember when we face our incredibly
remember when we face our incredibly
remember when we face our incredibly complicated lives that there is always
complicated lives that there is always
complicated lives that there is always somebody out there in more dire straits
somebody out there in more dire straits
somebody out there in more dire straits doing something amazing overcoming
doing something amazing overcoming
doing something amazing overcoming barriers with creativity like this woman
barriers with creativity like this woman
barriers with creativity like this woman did what I want you to come away from
did what I want you to come away from
did what I want you to come away from today with is that I want you to think
today with is that I want you to think
today with is that I want you to think about what you thought about at the
about what you thought about at the
about what you thought about at the beginning of this I want you to stop
beginning of this I want you to stop
beginning of this I want you to stop waiting on the perfect someday to go out
waiting on the perfect someday to go out
waiting on the perfect someday to go out and achieve your goals or to take an
and achieve your goals or to take an
and achieve your goals or to take an opportunity I want you to look at the
opportunity I want you to look at the
opportunity I want you to look at the barriers that you face and use your
barriers that you face and use your
barriers that you face and use your creativity and your courage and your
creativity and your courage and your
creativity and your courage and your perseverance to overcome those barriers
perseverance to overcome those barriers
perseverance to overcome those barriers I want you to think about these women
I want you to think about these women
I want you to think about these women and go and chase after your dreams
and go and chase after your dreams
and go and chase after your dreams because I believe if we all start to
because I believe if we all start to
because I believe if we all start to overcome the barriers around time that
overcome the barriers around time that
overcome the barriers around time that we can go out and change the world thank
we can go out and change the world thank
we can go out and change the world thank [Applause]
”
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