about three years ago today during my senior year of high school I stood on
senior year of high school I stood on
senior year of high school I stood on this exact stage and I came out to my
this exact stage and I came out to my
this exact stage and I came out to my teachers and peers as trans male I was
teachers and peers as trans male I was
teachers and peers as trans male I was overwhelmed with joy because I got to
overwhelmed with joy because I got to
overwhelmed with joy because I got to claim who I was there’s something
claim who I was there’s something
claim who I was there’s something incredibly liberating about being able
incredibly liberating about being able
incredibly liberating about being able to be your authentic self I continued to
to be your authentic self I continued to
to be your authentic self I continued to come out to other people and with every
come out to other people and with every
come out to other people and with every coming out story my life got better I
coming out story my life got better I
coming out story my life got better I found a profound sense of joy and
found a profound sense of joy and
found a profound sense of joy and freedom and being able to be myself
freedom and being able to be myself
freedom and being able to be myself around my family and friends looking
around my family and friends looking
around my family and friends looking back I now realized that accepting and
back I now realized that accepting and
back I now realized that accepting and expressing my trans identity really
expressing my trans identity really
expressing my trans identity really saves me I didn’t realize it at the time
saves me I didn’t realize it at the time
saves me I didn’t realize it at the time but claiming my trans identity was a
but claiming my trans identity was a
but claiming my trans identity was a huge part of not only surviving but
huge part of not only surviving but
huge part of not only surviving but allowing myself to flourish coming out
allowing myself to flourish coming out
allowing myself to flourish coming out on the stage was a pivotal point and
on the stage was a pivotal point and
on the stage was a pivotal point and learning to love and accept myself
learning to love and accept myself
learning to love and accept myself though I wouldn’t have been able to
though I wouldn’t have been able to
though I wouldn’t have been able to admit it at the time I felt like a big
admit it at the time I felt like a big
admit it at the time I felt like a big hypocrite because while I was boldly
hypocrite because while I was boldly
hypocrite because while I was boldly declaring who I was on this stage and
declaring who I was on this stage and
declaring who I was on this stage and even mentoring younger trans youth about
even mentoring younger trans youth about
even mentoring younger trans youth about how there was this whole community out
how there was this whole community out
how there was this whole community out there supporting them and how they
there supporting them and how they
there supporting them and how they should be proud of who they were
should be proud of who they were
should be proud of who they were underneath it all I really resented my
underneath it all I really resented my
underneath it all I really resented my trans identity despite what most people
trans identity despite what most people
trans identity despite what most people might have seen the beginning of high
might have seen the beginning of high
might have seen the beginning of high school was really rough for me I hated
school was really rough for me I hated
school was really rough for me I hated my anatomy and I had a lot of gender
my anatomy and I had a lot of gender
my anatomy and I had a lot of gender dysphoria which can be described as the
dysphoria which can be described as the
dysphoria which can be described as the discomfort one feels with their
discomfort one feels with their
discomfort one feels with their biological sex the guy that I am wasn’t
biological sex the guy that I am wasn’t
biological sex the guy that I am wasn’t reflected by my anatomy and I felt like
reflected by my anatomy and I felt like
reflected by my anatomy and I felt like I had no control over my body I remember
I had no control over my body I remember
I had no control over my body I remember thinking that whatever spiritual being
thinking that whatever spiritual being
thinking that whatever spiritual being was in charge of making me got the wrong
was in charge of making me got the wrong
was in charge of making me got the wrong instructions when assembling me I began
instructions when assembling me I began
instructions when assembling me I began to self-harm and I became very depressed
to self-harm and I became very depressed
to self-harm and I became very depressed I had this deep belief that no one would
I had this deep belief that no one would
I had this deep belief that no one would ever love me I thought that I would
ever love me I thought that I would
ever love me I thought that I would never be able to be in a romantic
never be able to be in a romantic
never be able to be in a romantic relationship because no one would ever
relationship because no one would ever
relationship because no one would ever accept me that potential partners would
accept me that potential partners would
accept me that potential partners would be disgusted by my mismatch and want
be disgusted by my mismatch and want
be disgusted by my mismatch and want nothing to do with me and a lot of ways
nothing to do with me and a lot of ways
nothing to do with me and a lot of ways my trans identity was a source of pain
my trans identity was a source of pain
my trans identity was a source of pain fear and insecurity I found refuge from
fear and insecurity I found refuge from
fear and insecurity I found refuge from my depression in dysphoria through
my depression in dysphoria through
my depression in dysphoria through community I became very close with a
community I became very close with a
community I became very close with a science teacher in high school who
science teacher in high school who
science teacher in high school who provided me with the emotional and
provided me with the emotional and
provided me with the emotional and physical space de positively cope with
physical space de positively cope with
physical space de positively cope with my emotions I was in her office
my emotions I was in her office
my emotions I was in her office countless
countless
countless venting about my dysphoria or conflicts
venting about my dysphoria or conflicts
venting about my dysphoria or conflicts at home countless other teachers in my
at home countless other teachers in my
at home countless other teachers in my high school never cease to amaze me with
high school never cease to amaze me with
high school never cease to amaze me with their constant love and support I was
their constant love and support I was
their constant love and support I was also referred to an organization called
also referred to an organization called
also referred to an organization called side by side in high school side by side
side by side in high school side by side
side by side in high school side by side is a youth organization in Richmond that
is a youth organization in Richmond that
is a youth organization in Richmond that provides LGBTQ kids with support through
provides LGBTQ kids with support through
provides LGBTQ kids with support through side by side I was able to meet other
side by side I was able to meet other
side by side I was able to meet other LGBTQ people and learn more about the
LGBTQ people and learn more about the
LGBTQ people and learn more about the LGBTQ community side by side also
LGBTQ community side by side also
LGBTQ community side by side also provided me with two awesome mentors who
provided me with two awesome mentors who
provided me with two awesome mentors who became my own personal superheroes they
became my own personal superheroes they
became my own personal superheroes they were and still are pillars of guidance
were and still are pillars of guidance
were and still are pillars of guidance and encouragement for me I had all these
and encouragement for me I had all these
and encouragement for me I had all these feelings about my gender but I had no
feelings about my gender but I had no
feelings about my gender but I had no way of putting them into words the trans
way of putting them into words the trans
way of putting them into words the trans youth I met through side by side really
youth I met through side by side really
youth I met through side by side really helped me discover my trans identity I
helped me discover my trans identity I
helped me discover my trans identity I remember hearing their stories and
remember hearing their stories and
remember hearing their stories and thinking I got it I finally know who i
thinking I got it I finally know who i
thinking I got it I finally know who i am now I can finally put what I’m
am now I can finally put what I’m
am now I can finally put what I’m thinking and feeling into words there
thinking and feeling into words there
thinking and feeling into words there are other people out there who can
are other people out there who can
are other people out there who can relate to what I’m feeling I was able to
relate to what I’m feeling I was able to
relate to what I’m feeling I was able to not only find a community but my own
not only find a community but my own
not only find a community but my own voice through this community the trans
voice through this community the trans
voice through this community the trans youth I met really empowered me I used
youth I met really empowered me I used
youth I met really empowered me I used all these resources to create a second
all these resources to create a second
all these resources to create a second family I used to say that if I could go
family I used to say that if I could go
family I used to say that if I could go back in time and change my biological
back in time and change my biological
back in time and change my biological sex I wouldn’t a heartbeat today I can
sex I wouldn’t a heartbeat today I can
sex I wouldn’t a heartbeat today I can say without hesitation but if I could go
say without hesitation but if I could go
say without hesitation but if I could go back in time and change things I
back in time and change things I
back in time and change things I wouldn’t that if I could choose to be
wouldn’t that if I could choose to be
wouldn’t that if I could choose to be trans I would every single time
trans I would every single time
trans I would every single time ironically the thing i want to despise
ironically the thing i want to despise
ironically the thing i want to despise most about myself became my salvation
most about myself became my salvation
most about myself became my salvation without my trans identity I wouldn’t be
without my trans identity I wouldn’t be
without my trans identity I wouldn’t be nearly as empathetic as I am today and I
nearly as empathetic as I am today and I
nearly as empathetic as I am today and I wouldn’t have the incredible family that
wouldn’t have the incredible family that
wouldn’t have the incredible family that I do today I also wouldn’t know the
I do today I also wouldn’t know the
I do today I also wouldn’t know the value of community in the way that I do
value of community in the way that I do
value of community in the way that I do today my transition has created some
today my transition has created some
today my transition has created some awkward and funny moments that are
awkward and funny moments that are
awkward and funny moments that are brought my life joy in ways I wouldn’t
brought my life joy in ways I wouldn’t
brought my life joy in ways I wouldn’t have otherwise experienced the trans
have otherwise experienced the trans
have otherwise experienced the trans community is one of the most vibrant
community is one of the most vibrant
community is one of the most vibrant resilient and courageous communities out
resilient and courageous communities out
resilient and courageous communities out there I’m so proud and glad that I have
there I’m so proud and glad that I have
there I’m so proud and glad that I have the opportunity to be a part of it one
the opportunity to be a part of it one
the opportunity to be a part of it one of my favorite quotes for my senior
of my favorite quotes for my senior
of my favorite quotes for my senior speech was I am a boy I was just made a
speech was I am a boy I was just made a
speech was I am a boy I was just made a little differently the most they’re
little differently the most they’re
little differently the most they’re claiming our identities trans people
claiming our identities trans people
claiming our identities trans people continually show society that not all
continually show society that not all
continually show society that not all boys and girls are made in the same
boys and girls are made in the same
boys and girls are made in the same respective ways we also break down
respective ways we also break down
respective ways we also break down societal expectation
societal expectation
societal expectation and norms about gender and ways that
and norms about gender and ways that
and norms about gender and ways that benefit all people trains are not I like
benefit all people trains are not I like
benefit all people trains are not I like to think that we were leaders daringly
to think that we were leaders daringly
to think that we were leaders daringly redefining what gender is and how to
redefining what gender is and how to
redefining what gender is and how to express it through this reconstruction
express it through this reconstruction
express it through this reconstruction we create something inspiring nothing
we create something inspiring nothing
we create something inspiring nothing short of magnificent
”
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