oh I gotta be honest this is weird for me because like James said I’m a I’m a
me because like James said I’m a I’m a
me because like James said I’m a I’m a stand-up comedian so Wow fans of comedy
stand-up comedian so Wow fans of comedy
stand-up comedian so Wow fans of comedy here that’s good good start good start
here that’s good good start good start
here that’s good good start good start yeah I’m usually following like an
yeah I’m usually following like an
yeah I’m usually following like an unfunny comic who’s come out and he’s
unfunny comic who’s come out and he’s
unfunny comic who’s come out and he’s Bob instead I’m following an engineer
Bob instead I’m following an engineer
Bob instead I’m following an engineer from NASA who’s just like blown away the
from NASA who’s just like blown away the
from NASA who’s just like blown away the crowd and Mary Sue who just I believe
crowd and Mary Sue who just I believe
crowd and Mary Sue who just I believe pass around cookies okay how do I follow
pass around cookies okay how do I follow
pass around cookies okay how do I follow cookies
cookies
cookies thank you guys they’re all enjoying I
thank you guys they’re all enjoying I
thank you guys they’re all enjoying I feel like I should have brought milk
feel like I should have brought milk
feel like I should have brought milk I feel unprepared so yeah this will be
I feel unprepared so yeah this will be
I feel unprepared so yeah this will be interesting for me at this point usually
interesting for me at this point usually
interesting for me at this point usually when I’m on stage I’m at this point I’m
when I’m on stage I’m at this point I’m
when I’m on stage I’m at this point I’m like you know telling gay jokes and over
like you know telling gay jokes and over
like you know telling gay jokes and over explaining my gender but instead I’m
explaining my gender but instead I’m
explaining my gender but instead I’m here like googling things about space
here like googling things about space
here like googling things about space and trying to find like some
and trying to find like some
and trying to find like some inspirational quotes like Nelson Mandela
inspirational quotes like Nelson Mandela
inspirational quotes like Nelson Mandela or something you know so it should be
or something you know so it should be
or something you know so it should be interesting for me I’ll start with this
interesting for me I’ll start with this
interesting for me I’ll start with this my name is a be Cassidy I am a stand-up
my name is a be Cassidy I am a stand-up
my name is a be Cassidy I am a stand-up comedian based in Los Angeles and I have
comedian based in Los Angeles and I have
comedian based in Los Angeles and I have no idea what I’m doing here today
no idea what I’m doing here today
no idea what I’m doing here today I’m just gonna be honest with you
I’m just gonna be honest with you
I’m just gonna be honest with you throughout this whole thing okay because
throughout this whole thing okay because
throughout this whole thing okay because you’re gonna hear from a lot of people
you’re gonna hear from a lot of people
you’re gonna hear from a lot of people as we already have you know about
as we already have you know about
as we already have you know about whatever you know failure led to their
whatever you know failure led to their
whatever you know failure led to their now success but to be real
now success but to be real
now success but to be real I have no success okay this I’m still in
I have no success okay this I’m still in
I have no success okay this I’m still in the failure part I am I’m serious this
the failure part I am I’m serious this
the failure part I am I’m serious this is actually the most successful thing
is actually the most successful thing
is actually the most successful thing I’ve ever done like this thank you thank
I’ve ever done like this thank you thank
I’ve ever done like this thank you thank you
you
you yeah I’m like in the moment right now so
yeah I’m like in the moment right now so
yeah I’m like in the moment right now so like what am I gonna talk about great
like what am I gonna talk about great
like what am I gonna talk about great question I have no idea I’m so serious I
question I have no idea I’m so serious I
question I have no idea I’m so serious I don’t know why they called me but I’m
don’t know why they called me but I’m
don’t know why they called me but I’m excited about it
excited about it
excited about it I’ll tell you that because here’s the
I’ll tell you that because here’s the
I’ll tell you that because here’s the thing that I do feel educated enough to
thing that I do feel educated enough to
thing that I do feel educated enough to talk about is that failure is really
talk about is that failure is really
talk about is that failure is really really hard and I also know that every
really hard and I also know that every
really hard and I also know that every time that I fail as a comedian every
time that I fail as a comedian every
time that I fail as a comedian every time I bomb onstage or I fail that I get
time I bomb onstage or I fail that I get
time I bomb onstage or I fail that I get better so I remember the very first time
better so I remember the very first time
better so I remember the very first time I ever did comedy it was at college I
I ever did comedy it was at college I
I ever did comedy it was at college I went to the University of Redlands about
went to the University of Redlands about
went to the University of Redlands about an hour east of here and I was part of a
an hour east of here and I was part of a
an hour east of here and I was part of a really great program called the Johnson
really great program called the Johnson
really great program called the Johnson center for Integrative studies and they
center for Integrative studies and they
center for Integrative studies and they actually allowed me to study stand-up
actually allowed me to study stand-up
actually allowed me to study stand-up comedy which probably sounds like the
comedy which probably sounds like the
comedy which probably sounds like the craziest thing you’ve ever heard it was
craziest thing you’ve ever heard it was
craziest thing you’ve ever heard it was a program where you designed your major
a program where you designed your major
a program where you designed your major and my emphasis was the art of
and my emphasis was the art of
and my emphasis was the art of storytelling through comedy and feminism
storytelling through comedy and feminism
storytelling through comedy and feminism so I did study stand-up amongst other
so I did study stand-up amongst other
so I did study stand-up amongst other things
things
things I studied creative writing nonfiction I
I studied creative writing nonfiction I
I studied creative writing nonfiction I studied theater feminist film theory but
studied theater feminist film theory but
studied theater feminist film theory but they knew I had a passion for stand-up
they knew I had a passion for stand-up
they knew I had a passion for stand-up so they allowed me to study these fields
so they allowed me to study these fields
so they allowed me to study these fields through a comedic lens I really have to
through a comedic lens I really have to
through a comedic lens I really have to give them credit cuz I wouldn’t be where
give them credit cuz I wouldn’t be where
give them credit cuz I wouldn’t be where I’m at today
I’m at today
I’m at today you know without them it’s it was a
you know without them it’s it was a
you know without them it’s it was a pretty amazing opportunity and they
pretty amazing opportunity and they
pretty amazing opportunity and they allowed me to do other really great
allowed me to do other really great
allowed me to do other really great things like teach a class on women and
things like teach a class on women and
things like teach a class on women and comedy where I got to study the styles
comedy where I got to study the styles
comedy where I got to study the styles and techniques of a lot of really you
and techniques of a lot of really you
and techniques of a lot of really you know amazing women and I also got to
know amazing women and I also got to
know amazing women and I also got to produce comedy shows so I brought in
produce comedy shows so I brought in
produce comedy shows so I brought in Wanda Sykes and TIG Notaro
Wanda Sykes and TIG Notaro
Wanda Sykes and TIG Notaro and a lot of these women that I really
and a lot of these women that I really
and a lot of these women that I really respected but here’s the thing I wasn’t
respected but here’s the thing I wasn’t
respected but here’s the thing I wasn’t performing with them I was the producers
performing with them I was the producers
performing with them I was the producers the producer on the show so I was
the producer on the show so I was
the producer on the show so I was watching from the side
watching from the side
watching from the side from from the wings of the stage if you
from from the wings of the stage if you
from from the wings of the stage if you will and I would see them from afar and
will and I would see them from afar and
will and I would see them from afar and I think like wow that’s so amazing and I
I think like wow that’s so amazing and I
I think like wow that’s so amazing and I kind of got this bug it was like a
kind of got this bug it was like a
kind of got this bug it was like a little bite that kind of inspired like I
little bite that kind of inspired like I
little bite that kind of inspired like I want to do that but even though I had
want to do that but even though I had
want to do that but even though I had done theater my whole life I didn’t I
done theater my whole life I didn’t I
done theater my whole life I didn’t I didn’t think I was capable of doing
didn’t think I was capable of doing
didn’t think I was capable of doing stand-up I was like I don’t know what
stand-up I was like I don’t know what
stand-up I was like I don’t know what I’d have to say would I talk about so
I’d have to say would I talk about so
I’d have to say would I talk about so just watch them from afar but I got the
just watch them from afar but I got the
just watch them from afar but I got the bug okay so I had it planted in me like
bug okay so I had it planted in me like
bug okay so I had it planted in me like oh maybe I could try that one day so a
oh maybe I could try that one day so a
oh maybe I could try that one day so a few weeks after my show with Wanda Sykes
few weeks after my show with Wanda Sykes
few weeks after my show with Wanda Sykes the Johnson center was doing an open mic
the Johnson center was doing an open mic
the Johnson center was doing an open mic and I finally found the courage to try
and I finally found the courage to try
and I finally found the courage to try stand-up and by courage I mean vodka
stand-up and by courage I mean vodka
stand-up and by courage I mean vodka there was a lot of vodka involved okay
there was a lot of vodka involved okay
there was a lot of vodka involved okay but I got up there I did a set and it
but I got up there I did a set and it
but I got up there I did a set and it would really well what did I talk about
would really well what did I talk about
would really well what did I talk about okay that’s a great question I don’t
okay that’s a great question I don’t
okay that’s a great question I don’t actually know I blacked out not from the
actually know I blacked out not from the
actually know I blacked out not from the booze not from the booze from the fear
booze not from the booze from the fear
booze not from the booze from the fear okay just gone but I think I did well
okay just gone but I think I did well
okay just gone but I think I did well because people were coming up after and
because people were coming up after and
because people were coming up after and they were like wow that was amazing you
they were like wow that was amazing you
they were like wow that was amazing you know I’d do this more often I was so
know I’d do this more often I was so
know I’d do this more often I was so funny and I’ll tell you I felt
funny and I’ll tell you I felt
funny and I’ll tell you I felt incredible like oh my gosh I can do this
incredible like oh my gosh I can do this
incredible like oh my gosh I can do this this is something I’m really good at so
this is something I’m really good at so
this is something I’m really good at so I kind of got like in my head like all
I kind of got like in my head like all
I kind of got like in my head like all right this is great I’m gonna do this so
right this is great I’m gonna do this so
right this is great I’m gonna do this so the next open mic I got up again and I
the next open mic I got up again and I
the next open mic I got up again and I tried to pull from you know some of the
tried to pull from you know some of the
tried to pull from you know some of the material that I had remembered from the
material that I had remembered from the
material that I had remembered from the last time and this time I bombed like
last time and this time I bombed like
last time and this time I bombed like really bombed I was basically just
really bombed I was basically just
really bombed I was basically just saying words that didn’t make sense I
saying words that didn’t make sense I
saying words that didn’t make sense I was like apples and bananas it’s crazy
was like apples and bananas it’s crazy
was like apples and bananas it’s crazy Wow
Wow
Wow okay like it was it was just like
okay like it was it was just like
okay like it was it was just like nonsense people caught up and left okay
nonsense people caught up and left okay
nonsense people caught up and left okay they were they were out and I actually
they were they were out and I actually
they were they were out and I actually didn’t even end on a joke I didn’t even
didn’t even end on a joke I didn’t even
didn’t even end on a joke I didn’t even like wrap up my sad this was like okay
like wrap up my sad this was like okay
like wrap up my sad this was like okay enough I just got off stage like I
enough I just got off stage like I
enough I just got off stage like I couldn’t handle it it was humiliating
couldn’t handle it it was humiliating
couldn’t handle it it was humiliating and I actually remember hiding from
and I actually remember hiding from
and I actually remember hiding from people for days like I hid I was so
people for days like I hid I was so
people for days like I hid I was so embarrassed because it felt like public
embarrassed because it felt like public
embarrassed because it felt like public humiliation you know you’re up there and
humiliation you know you’re up there and
humiliation you know you’re up there and you’re being vulnerable and you know
you’re being vulnerable and you know
you’re being vulnerable and you know it’s hard to do that and I think that
it’s hard to do that and I think that
it’s hard to do that and I think that all you know can relate to that somehow
all you know can relate to that somehow
all you know can relate to that somehow because I think that we’ve either had
because I think that we’ve either had
because I think that we’ve either had public humiliation or we you know in one
public humiliation or we you know in one
public humiliation or we you know in one way or other it’s it’s mostly you know
way or other it’s it’s mostly you know
way or other it’s it’s mostly you know I’m not doctor Castel pastel but I don’t
I’m not doctor Castel pastel but I don’t
I’m not doctor Castel pastel but I don’t I don’t know much about the mind but I
I don’t know much about the mind but I
I don’t know much about the mind but I do know a lot of people have this fear
do know a lot of people have this fear
do know a lot of people have this fear of public humiliation you know that’s
of public humiliation you know that’s
of public humiliation you know that’s why people get scared when their public
why people get scared when their public
why people get scared when their public speaking they don’t think about people
speaking they don’t think about people
speaking they don’t think about people in their underwear or when you know you
in their underwear or when you know you
in their underwear or when you know you dream everyone has this common dream
dream everyone has this common dream
dream everyone has this common dream that the biggest fear is showing up
that the biggest fear is showing up
that the biggest fear is showing up somewhere naked like to work her to
somewhere naked like to work her to
somewhere naked like to work her to school which by the way I don’t get
school which by the way I don’t get
school which by the way I don’t get those dreams I know that’s like a thing
those dreams I know that’s like a thing
those dreams I know that’s like a thing for people so that’s why I’m bringing it
for people so that’s why I’m bringing it
for people so that’s why I’m bringing it up but I don’t have that like I feel
up but I don’t have that like I feel
up but I don’t have that like I feel like if I was naked in a dream it would
like if I was naked in a dream it would
like if I was naked in a dream it would be a nightmare you know let’s just say
be a nightmare you know let’s just say
be a nightmare you know let’s just say that be a nightmare but yeah that’s you
that be a nightmare but yeah that’s you
that be a nightmare but yeah that’s you know public humiliation we all have this
know public humiliation we all have this
know public humiliation we all have this beer so here’s the thing how do you come
beer so here’s the thing how do you come
beer so here’s the thing how do you come back from public failure well here’s the
back from public failure well here’s the
back from public failure well here’s the truth it was an open mic on a Saturday
truth it was an open mic on a Saturday
truth it was an open mic on a Saturday night people are drinking no one even
night people are drinking no one even
night people are drinking no one even really remembered it it wasn’t that big
really remembered it it wasn’t that big
really remembered it it wasn’t that big of a deal okay there was no need for me
of a deal okay there was no need for me
of a deal okay there was no need for me to be hiding but we are our own worst
to be hiding but we are our own worst
to be hiding but we are our own worst critics so to me this mistake was
critics so to me this mistake was
critics so to me this mistake was actually colossal and I was like I could
actually colossal and I was like I could
actually colossal and I was like I could never do that again so the next year I
never do that again so the next year I
never do that again so the next year I graduated I moved to Los Angeles and I
graduated I moved to Los Angeles and I
graduated I moved to Los Angeles and I moved with my friend Harry and Harry
moved with my friend Harry and Harry
moved with my friend Harry and Harry really wanted to do stand-up so he’s
really wanted to do stand-up so he’s
really wanted to do stand-up so he’s okay
okay
okay come with me to these shows and the
come with me to these shows and the
come with me to these shows and the thought of me getting back on stage made
thought of me getting back on stage made
thought of me getting back on stage made me actually want to vomit
me actually want to vomit
me actually want to vomit so I was like I’ll go with you and I’ll
so I was like I’ll go with you and I’ll
so I was like I’ll go with you and I’ll watch now keep in mind these are open
watch now keep in mind these are open
watch now keep in mind these are open mics in Los Angeles so you know it’s not
mics in Los Angeles so you know it’s not
mics in Los Angeles so you know it’s not like great comedy clubs like The Improv
like great comedy clubs like The Improv
like great comedy clubs like The Improv Laugh Factory this isn’t even where at
Laugh Factory this isn’t even where at
Laugh Factory this isn’t even where at places people don’t even want to see
places people don’t even want to see
places people don’t even want to see comedy you know I’m talking like sports
comedy you know I’m talking like sports
comedy you know I’m talking like sports bars and
by sports bars I mean Hooters okay at
by sports bars I mean Hooters okay at Elgin would be very honest throughout
Elgin would be very honest throughout
Elgin would be very honest throughout this well you know by the way I’m pretty
this well you know by the way I’m pretty
this well you know by the way I’m pretty sure that I am the last thing that
sure that I am the last thing that
sure that I am the last thing that people go to Hooters to see okay
people go to Hooters to see okay
people go to Hooters to see okay like I’m definitely not the top three
like I’m definitely not the top three
like I’m definitely not the top three most exciting things at Hooters
most exciting things at Hooters
most exciting things at Hooters so it cieariy go to these things that i
so it cieariy go to these things that i
so it cieariy go to these things that i think like you know this is cool but
think like you know this is cool but
think like you know this is cool but like what do I have to say that is
like what do I have to say that is
like what do I have to say that is important or funny enough that I could
important or funny enough that I could
important or funny enough that I could get up and distract someone from their
get up and distract someone from their
get up and distract someone from their game and beg pay attention like I didn’t
game and beg pay attention like I didn’t
game and beg pay attention like I didn’t I didn’t have that confidence but Harry
I didn’t have that confidence but Harry
I didn’t have that confidence but Harry did and Harry would get up and he’d get
did and Harry would get up and he’d get
did and Harry would get up and he’d get off the stage and he’d work out material
off the stage and he’d work out material
off the stage and he’d work out material with me I think this joke did well this
with me I think this joke did well this
with me I think this joke did well this time or maybe this and I could see him
time or maybe this and I could see him
time or maybe this and I could see him getting better and it was at that point
getting better and it was at that point
getting better and it was at that point that I realized that by not getting up
that I realized that by not getting up
that I realized that by not getting up at all I was failing that was failure
at all I was failing that was failure
at all I was failing that was failure because I wasn’t at least trying to do
because I wasn’t at least trying to do
because I wasn’t at least trying to do well I wasn’t trying to get better I had
well I wasn’t trying to get better I had
well I wasn’t trying to get better I had just failed that one time and it was
just failed that one time and it was
just failed that one time and it was hard to fail so I quit but that I then
hard to fail so I quit but that I then
hard to fail so I quit but that I then realized meant I couldn’t do comedy
realized meant I couldn’t do comedy
realized meant I couldn’t do comedy I could either just quit cuz failure is
I could either just quit cuz failure is
I could either just quit cuz failure is hard or I could at least try and try to
hard or I could at least try and try to
hard or I could at least try and try to get better I could you know go on fail
get better I could you know go on fail
get better I could you know go on fail on if you will so I told myself that the
on if you will so I told myself that the
on if you will so I told myself that the next open-mike Harry goes to I’m gonna
next open-mike Harry goes to I’m gonna
next open-mike Harry goes to I’m gonna get up and I remember it was actually
get up and I remember it was actually
get up and I remember it was actually the day that Joan Rivers died and I
the day that Joan Rivers died and I
the day that Joan Rivers died and I remember because I thought wow this
remember because I thought wow this
remember because I thought wow this would be a really iconic day to start
would be a really iconic day to start
would be a really iconic day to start comedy and I laugh about that now
comedy and I laugh about that now
comedy and I laugh about that now because it was not an iconic day to
because it was not an iconic day to
because it was not an iconic day to start comedy we went to this open mic it
start comedy we went to this open mic it
start comedy we went to this open mic it was about one microphone stand with a
was about one microphone stand with a
was about one microphone stand with a bunch of empty benches and it was in the
bunch of empty benches and it was in the
bunch of empty benches and it was in the back of a grocery store I’m not kidding
back of a grocery store I’m not kidding
back of a grocery store I’m not kidding you people were shopping okay they were
you people were shopping okay they were
you people were shopping okay they were literally shopping in the aisles
but I told myself I’m gonna get up I say
but I told myself I’m gonna get up I say I’m gonna do this and I had written a
I’m gonna do this and I had written a
I’m gonna do this and I had written a set I had done my material and
set I had done my material and
set I had done my material and everything and I’m like waiting to get
everything and I’m like waiting to get
everything and I’m like waiting to get called up on stage I look out I
called up on stage I look out I
called up on stage I look out I literally I saw a woman in Aisle 4
literally I saw a woman in Aisle 4
literally I saw a woman in Aisle 4 examining a soup label it’s just like
examining a soup label it’s just like
examining a soup label it’s just like this and I can hear the check I like
this and I can hear the check I like
this and I can hear the check I like beep beep I’m standing there like
beep beep I’m standing there like
beep beep I’m standing there like nervous like all right I got this if it
nervous like all right I got this if it
nervous like all right I got this if it were you guys do your thing I’m just
were you guys do your thing I’m just
were you guys do your thing I’m just trying to you know achieve my dreams
trying to you know achieve my dreams
trying to you know achieve my dreams over here paper or plastic pick one
over here paper or plastic pick one
over here paper or plastic pick one already I’m getting on the stage okay so
already I’m getting on the stage okay so
already I’m getting on the stage okay so I got up and I was really exciting like
I got up and I was really exciting like
I got up and I was really exciting like I said I was prepared this time you know
I said I was prepared this time you know
I said I was prepared this time you know no vodka for bro to set and I was really
no vodka for bro to set and I was really
no vodka for bro to set and I was really excited and I bombed even worse I was so
excited and I bombed even worse I was so
excited and I bombed even worse I was so awful and I’ll tell you something it
awful and I’ll tell you something it
awful and I’ll tell you something it wasn’t that easy to just accept that
wasn’t that easy to just accept that
wasn’t that easy to just accept that failure you know to Becca I like to just
failure you know to Becca I like to just
failure you know to Becca I like to just know it was it was soul sucking it was
know it was it was soul sucking it was
know it was it was soul sucking it was literally draining I was like that was
literally draining I was like that was
literally draining I was like that was mortifying and I was like I’m never ever
mortifying and I was like I’m never ever
mortifying and I was like I’m never ever ever doing this again it was the worst
ever doing this again it was the worst
ever doing this again it was the worst feeling so a few weeks passed and a good
feeling so a few weeks passed and a good
feeling so a few weeks passed and a good friend of mine invited me to a comedy
friend of mine invited me to a comedy
friend of mine invited me to a comedy show actually out here in Pasadena at
show actually out here in Pasadena at
show actually out here in Pasadena at the Ice House which is a very famous
the Ice House which is a very famous
the Ice House which is a very famous club it’s been around for a long time
club it’s been around for a long time
club it’s been around for a long time and she said I have a friend who’s
and she said I have a friend who’s
and she said I have a friend who’s performing is a really big headliner
performing is a really big headliner
performing is a really big headliner there’s a guy named Jeff Garcia it’s a
there’s a guy named Jeff Garcia it’s a
there’s a guy named Jeff Garcia it’s a big national touring headliner she said
big national touring headliner she said
big national touring headliner she said why don’t you come I can introduce you
why don’t you come I can introduce you
why don’t you come I can introduce you before the show and at that point I had
before the show and at that point I had
before the show and at that point I had kind of left comedy I wanted to start to
kind of left comedy I wanted to start to
kind of left comedy I wanted to start to and voiceovers and he’s a big voiceover
and voiceovers and he’s a big voiceover
and voiceovers and he’s a big voiceover guy he does you know Jimmy Neutron and
guy he does you know Jimmy Neutron and
guy he does you know Jimmy Neutron and Happy Feet so it’s okay well pick his
Happy Feet so it’s okay well pick his
Happy Feet so it’s okay well pick his brain so I went before the show and on
brain so I went before the show and on
brain so I went before the show and on that M&E turned out to be the nicest guy
that M&E turned out to be the nicest guy
that M&E turned out to be the nicest guy ever and we start talking and he says
ever and we start talking and he says
ever and we start talking and he says what are you doing in LA and I said
what are you doing in LA and I said
what are you doing in LA and I said comedy and he said how do you do
comedy and he said how do you do
comedy and he said how do you do stand-up they said yes
and then he said great how many minutes
and then he said great how many minutes do you have as in how long
do you have as in how long
do you have as in how long how much materially do you have how long
how much materially do you have how long
how much materially do you have how long can you do and here I’m all sudden
can you do and here I’m all sudden
can you do and here I’m all sudden feeling so silly for trying to tell this
feeling so silly for trying to tell this
feeling so silly for trying to tell this massive headliner sort of pass as a
massive headliner sort of pass as a
massive headliner sort of pass as a comedian when I’ve done two open mics
comedian when I’ve done two open mics
comedian when I’ve done two open mics for less than 30 seconds and it was just
for less than 30 seconds and it was just
for less than 30 seconds and it was just awful and so I said how many minutes
awful and so I said how many minutes
awful and so I said how many minutes five five minutes and then he said great
five five minutes and then he said great
five five minutes and then he said great I’ll put you up tonight you can do five
I’ll put you up tonight you can do five
I’ll put you up tonight you can do five okay yeah hear that whoo that’s how I
okay yeah hear that whoo that’s how I
okay yeah hear that whoo that’s how I felt
you telling me I literally was like I’ve
you telling me I literally was like I’ve made the worst mistake of my life
made the worst mistake of my life
made the worst mistake of my life and keep in mind this is no longer a
and keep in mind this is no longer a
and keep in mind this is no longer a grocery store or hooters this is a big
grocery store or hooters this is a big
grocery store or hooters this is a big club this is the ice house it’s a Friday
club this is the ice house it’s a Friday
club this is the ice house it’s a Friday night it’s packed 300 plus people sold
night it’s packed 300 plus people sold
night it’s packed 300 plus people sold out huge headliner and my last two shows
out huge headliner and my last two shows
out huge headliner and my last two shows worked just terrible so I was like I’ve
worked just terrible so I was like I’ve
worked just terrible so I was like I’ve made the worst mistake of my life and I
made the worst mistake of my life and I
made the worst mistake of my life and I need to get out of this and before I
need to get out of this and before I
need to get out of this and before I could say anything to him Jeff actually
could say anything to him Jeff actually
could say anything to him Jeff actually approached me and he said he came up to
approached me and he said he came up to
approached me and he said he came up to me and whispered he said hey I know
me and whispered he said hey I know
me and whispered he said hey I know you’re new I know this is one of your
you’re new I know this is one of your
you’re new I know this is one of your first times but this and he points to
first times but this and he points to
first times but this and he points to the stage this is how you get better and
the stage this is how you get better and
the stage this is how you get better and at that point I realized that he was
at that point I realized that he was
at that point I realized that he was right and if I hadn’t gotten up then I
right and if I hadn’t gotten up then I
right and if I hadn’t gotten up then I had already failed I had failed because
had already failed I had failed because
had already failed I had failed because I denied the opportunity to open for
I denied the opportunity to open for
I denied the opportunity to open for this big headliner I just been like no
this big headliner I just been like no
this big headliner I just been like no that’s gonna be hard but I realized that
that’s gonna be hard but I realized that
that’s gonna be hard but I realized that if I got up I at least had a chance of
if I got up I at least had a chance of
if I got up I at least had a chance of not failing I may be being okay and I
not failing I may be being okay and I
not failing I may be being okay and I know this sounds like really cheesy but
know this sounds like really cheesy but
know this sounds like really cheesy but it kind of mind to be like this is where
it kind of mind to be like this is where
it kind of mind to be like this is where I feel like I actually could use like
I feel like I actually could use like
I feel like I actually could use like like one slide with like an
like one slide with like an
like one slide with like an inspirational quote right now
inspirational quote right now
inspirational quote right now like I’m starting to get the whole slide
like I’m starting to get the whole slide
like I’m starting to get the whole slide thing like I feel like I feel like I
thing like I feel like I feel like I
thing like I feel like I feel like I need just like a picture of Wayne
need just like a picture of Wayne
need just like a picture of Wayne Gretzky that’s like you miss 100% of the
Gretzky that’s like you miss 100% of the
Gretzky that’s like you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take
shots you don’t take
shots you don’t take okay that’s how I felt I was like I’m
okay that’s how I felt I was like I’m
okay that’s how I felt I was like I’m gonna Wayne Gretzky this so I did it I
gonna Wayne Gretzky this so I did it I
gonna Wayne Gretzky this so I did it I got up
got up
got up sold sold out Joe and keep in mind this
sold sold out Joe and keep in mind this
sold sold out Joe and keep in mind this is Jeff Garcia he’s he’s Mexican
is Jeff Garcia he’s he’s Mexican
is Jeff Garcia he’s he’s Mexican you know Latino comic his whole audience
you know Latino comic his whole audience
you know Latino comic his whole audience all of his you know his whole fan base
all of his you know his whole fan base
all of his you know his whole fan base are Latinos and to put this in
are Latinos and to put this in
are Latinos and to put this in perspective the other comics did their
perspective the other comics did their
perspective the other comics did their sets in Spanish okay so not only was I
sets in Spanish okay so not only was I
sets in Spanish okay so not only was I the the only white girl there but I was
the the only white girl there but I was
the the only white girl there but I was definitely the only diesel Dyke okay hey
definitely the only diesel Dyke okay hey
definitely the only diesel Dyke okay hey I got on that stage and they did not
I got on that stage and they did not
I got on that stage and they did not know what I was a half of them thought I
know what I was a half of them thought I
know what I was a half of them thought I was a guy and by half I mean all of them
was a guy and by half I mean all of them
was a guy and by half I mean all of them it felt like going up and having a
it felt like going up and having a
it felt like going up and having a gender-reveal party I feel like I should
gender-reveal party I feel like I should
gender-reveal party I feel like I should have been like I should have done what
have been like I should have done what
have been like I should have done what Mary Sue didn’t pass around cupcakes you
Mary Sue didn’t pass around cupcakes you
Mary Sue didn’t pass around cupcakes you know I just put a little pink frosting
know I just put a little pink frosting
know I just put a little pink frosting in the middle so we all could just take
in the middle so we all could just take
in the middle so we all could just take a bite at the same time like oh it’s a
a bite at the same time like oh it’s a
a bite at the same time like oh it’s a girl
hey that would have been easier for me
hey that would have been easier for me but I think we can be honest with each
but I think we can be honest with each
but I think we can be honest with each other I think about half the people in
other I think about half the people in
other I think about half the people in this room also thought I was a dude
this room also thought I was a dude
this room also thought I was a dude until about a minute ago when I called
until about a minute ago when I called
until about a minute ago when I called myself a diesel take someone back
myself a diesel take someone back
myself a diesel take someone back there’s like I told you five bucks let’s
there’s like I told you five bucks let’s
there’s like I told you five bucks let’s go and it’s my dad
so I got up there and you know what I
so I got up there and you know what I didn’t actually do that bad I didn’t
didn’t actually do that bad I didn’t
didn’t actually do that bad I didn’t bomb I actually did okay I did all right
bomb I actually did okay I did all right
bomb I actually did okay I did all right I didn’t do my set in Spanish but I I
I didn’t do my set in Spanish but I I
I didn’t do my set in Spanish but I I did okay and I remember coming off like
did okay and I remember coming off like
did okay and I remember coming off like wow that wasn’t that bad and that’s when
wow that wasn’t that bad and that’s when
wow that wasn’t that bad and that’s when I realized that that’s kind of how it
I realized that that’s kind of how it
I realized that that’s kind of how it goes and stand-up you know like you
goes and stand-up you know like you
goes and stand-up you know like you never know like you could fail one time
never know like you could fail one time
never know like you could fail one time but then do great the other time doing
but then do great the other time doing
but then do great the other time doing the same set
the same set
the same set that’s what stand-up is it’s it’s about
that’s what stand-up is it’s it’s about
that’s what stand-up is it’s it’s about learning different venues and different
learning different venues and different
learning different venues and different crowds and so I started to welcome that
crowds and so I started to welcome that
crowds and so I started to welcome that failure I was like oh it’s actually a
failure I was like oh it’s actually a
failure I was like oh it’s actually a really good thing when I fail I know
really good thing when I fail I know
really good thing when I fail I know oh this joke doesn’t work here this
oh this joke doesn’t work here this
oh this joke doesn’t work here this doesn’t work in an auditorium or this
doesn’t work in an auditorium or this
doesn’t work in an auditorium or this works only in this kind of club or this
works only in this kind of club or this
works only in this kind of club or this works with this crowd so it my failure I
works with this crowd so it my failure I
works with this crowd so it my failure I started to grow from it I started to
started to grow from it I started to
started to grow from it I started to welcome that failure and the crazy thing
welcome that failure and the crazy thing
welcome that failure and the crazy thing is is Jeff Garcia actually became my
is is Jeff Garcia actually became my
is is Jeff Garcia actually became my mentor and I started featuring touring
mentor and I started featuring touring
mentor and I started featuring touring around the country for him and now my
around the country for him and now my
around the country for him and now my very small fan pace is ah Latinos okay
very small fan pace is ah Latinos okay
very small fan pace is ah Latinos okay I have I have no white fans and I love
I have I have no white fans and I love
I have I have no white fans and I love it it’s amazing so you know here’s the
it it’s amazing so you know here’s the
it it’s amazing so you know here’s the thing
thing
thing yes failure is really hard but you
yes failure is really hard but you
yes failure is really hard but you shouldn’t let that stop you you should
shouldn’t let that stop you you should
shouldn’t let that stop you you should let that start you whoo that was a good
let that start you whoo that was a good
let that start you whoo that was a good one
one
one that’s like I don’t even need Wayne
that’s like I don’t even need Wayne
that’s like I don’t even need Wayne Gretzky we’ve heard from a lot of people
Gretzky we’ve heard from a lot of people
Gretzky we’ve heard from a lot of people here today that failure apparently leads
here today that failure apparently leads
here today that failure apparently leads to success and I wish I could tell you I
to success and I wish I could tell you I
to success and I wish I could tell you I wish I really could say oh why you know
wish I really could say oh why you know
wish I really could say oh why you know bombed and then I got a Netflix special
bombed and then I got a Netflix special
bombed and then I got a Netflix special or I got to come a show on Comedy
or I got to come a show on Comedy
or I got to come a show on Comedy Central and I I’m not kidding I’m still
Central and I I’m not kidding I’m still
Central and I I’m not kidding I’m still in the failure part you know so I can’t
in the failure part you know so I can’t
in the failure part you know so I can’t attest to the Hat yet but I’m here
attest to the Hat yet but I’m here
attest to the Hat yet but I’m here aren’t I I’m doing a TEDx talk and I’m
aren’t I I’m doing a TEDx talk and I’m
aren’t I I’m doing a TEDx talk and I’m at this amazing school and sharing a
at this amazing school and sharing a
at this amazing school and sharing a stage with brilliant people so it’s like
stage with brilliant people so it’s like
stage with brilliant people so it’s like I’m here I’m doing this I’m telling
I’m here I’m doing this I’m telling
I’m here I’m doing this I’m telling diesel Dyke jokes something’s you know
diesel Dyke jokes something’s you know
diesel Dyke jokes something’s you know it’s gotta count for something right
it’s gotta count for something right
it’s gotta count for something right yeah thank you one person yes
follow me around please yes I like that
follow me around please yes I like that okay good yeah it counts for something
just because you have a chance of
just because you have a chance of failing doesn’t mean you should at least
failing doesn’t mean you should at least
failing doesn’t mean you should at least try if you just quit because it’s hard
try if you just quit because it’s hard
try if you just quit because it’s hard then you fail
then you fail
then you fail regardless you failed but if you at
regardless you failed but if you at
regardless you failed but if you at least try an attempt then there’s a
least try an attempt then there’s a
least try an attempt then there’s a chance you won’t fail and that’s a
chance you won’t fail and that’s a
chance you won’t fail and that’s a chance worth taking failure is hard but
chance worth taking failure is hard but
chance worth taking failure is hard but don’t let it stop you Thanks
don’t let it stop you Thanks
don’t let it stop you Thanks [Applause]
”
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