thank you and thank you for inviting me to speak
and thank you for inviting me to speak
and thank you for inviting me to speak this morning so I’m gonna pose a
this morning so I’m gonna pose a
this morning so I’m gonna pose a question this morning and the question
question this morning and the question
question this morning and the question is how do i define successful mentoring
is how do i define successful mentoring
is how do i define successful mentoring let me start by giving you a short
let me start by giving you a short
let me start by giving you a short answer to that question the short answer
answer to that question the short answer
answer to that question the short answer is successful mentoring to me is making
is successful mentoring to me is making
is successful mentoring to me is making a commitment to help someone that will
a commitment to help someone that will
a commitment to help someone that will be translated into a help for others
be translated into a help for others
be translated into a help for others down the line and what I want to do is I
down the line and what I want to do is I
down the line and what I want to do is I want to tell you ten short stories about
want to tell you ten short stories about
want to tell you ten short stories about people that I’ve mentored to illustrate
people that I’ve mentored to illustrate
people that I’ve mentored to illustrate how this occurs some of my words some of
how this occurs some of my words some of
how this occurs some of my words some of their words sometimes the words of
their words sometimes the words of
their words sometimes the words of others to tell these stories and then
others to tell these stories and then
others to tell these stories and then tie it together with what this all means
tie it together with what this all means
tie it together with what this all means so let me begin since I’m the vice dean
so let me begin since I’m the vice dean
so let me begin since I’m the vice dean for education at the Carey Business
for education at the Carey Business
for education at the Carey Business School I wanted to start by talking
School I wanted to start by talking
School I wanted to start by talking about an MBA student am i mentoring with
about an MBA student am i mentoring with
about an MBA student am i mentoring with this MBA student emerged organically
this MBA student emerged organically
this MBA student emerged organically over time and it wasn’t even planned
over time and it wasn’t even planned
over time and it wasn’t even planned Taylor was a full-time MBA student in
Taylor was a full-time MBA student in
Taylor was a full-time MBA student in our program and she was the student of
our program and she was the student of
our program and she was the student of my health care financing class she also
my health care financing class she also
my health care financing class she also helped to run a one-day activity for
helped to run a one-day activity for
helped to run a one-day activity for middle school and high school students
middle school and high school students
middle school and high school students through the University’s Center for
through the University’s Center for
through the University’s Center for talented youth and those students might
talented youth and those students might
talented youth and those students might be interested in business so a year ago
be interested in business so a year ago
be interested in business so a year ago she finally landed her dream job and at
she finally landed her dream job and at
she finally landed her dream job and at the end of the year I was sending notes
the end of the year I was sending notes
the end of the year I was sending notes to people about my most memorable
to people about my most memorable
to people about my most memorable experience with them during 2016 and I
experience with them during 2016 and I
experience with them during 2016 and I said to Taylor the most memorable thing
said to Taylor the most memorable thing
said to Taylor the most memorable thing with you this year was being invited to
with you this year was being invited to
with you this year was being invited to your departure dinner from Baltimore she
your departure dinner from Baltimore she
your departure dinner from Baltimore she wrote back telling me that that was one
wrote back telling me that that was one
wrote back telling me that that was one of the most thoughtful notes anyone had
of the most thoughtful notes anyone had
of the most thoughtful notes anyone had ever written to her and she said that’s
ever written to her and she said that’s
ever written to her and she said that’s not all in my experience when I was
not all in my experience when I was
not all in my experience when I was looking for a job and I had turned one
looking for a job and I had turned one
looking for a job and I had turned one position down and having a hard time you
position down and having a hard time you
position down and having a hard time you not only invited me to networking
not only invited me to networking
not only invited me to networking breakfasts
breakfasts
breakfasts like what you see here but you also
like what you see here but you also
like what you see here but you also stayed on top of my job search process
stayed on top of my job search process
stayed on top of my job search process and really helped me you offered me
and really helped me you offered me
and really helped me you offered me advice one piece of advice I offered was
advice one piece of advice I offered was
advice one piece of advice I offered was you know Taylor I’ve known lots of
you know Taylor I’ve known lots of
you know Taylor I’ve known lots of people who have taken a long time to
people who have taken a long time to
people who have taken a long time to find their first job and usually when
find their first job and usually when
find their first job and usually when they finally find it after that waiting
they finally find it after that waiting
they finally find it after that waiting they’re happy because they love the job
they’re happy because they love the job
they’re happy because they love the job that they found so it’s okay and she
that they found so it’s okay and she
that they found so it’s okay and she said that I had made her feel like she
said that I had made her feel like she
said that I had made her feel like she wasn’t a loser which was how she was
wasn’t a loser which was how she was
wasn’t a loser which was how she was feeling at the time and they had given
feeling at the time and they had given
feeling at the time and they had given her confidence back now I know whether I
her confidence back now I know whether I
her confidence back now I know whether I deserve all that much credit for what I
deserve all that much credit for what I
deserve all that much credit for what I did which just seemed like it was
did which just seemed like it was
did which just seemed like it was natural thing to do
natural thing to do
natural thing to do but I appreciated her recognition of the
but I appreciated her recognition of the
but I appreciated her recognition of the difference that I’d made for her when I
difference that I’d made for her when I
difference that I’d made for her when I was talking with Taylor about giving
was talking with Taylor about giving
was talking with Taylor about giving this
this
this today she said you also have to tell
today she said you also have to tell
today she said you also have to tell them about what you’ve done for Lauren
them about what you’ve done for Lauren
them about what you’ve done for Lauren it’s not any much encouragement to talk
it’s not any much encouragement to talk
it’s not any much encouragement to talk about Lauren Lauren is a young attorney
about Lauren Lauren is a young attorney
about Lauren Lauren is a young attorney I met Lauren a number of years ago and
I met Lauren a number of years ago and
I met Lauren a number of years ago and for the past four years week in and week
for the past four years week in and week
for the past four years week in and week out we’ve run together almost every week
out we’ve run together almost every week
out we’ve run together almost every week for an hour at a time
for an hour at a time
for an hour at a time and during that time we spend a whole
and during that time we spend a whole
and during that time we spend a whole lot of time talking about all kinds of
lot of time talking about all kinds of
lot of time talking about all kinds of things in life and what started out as
things in life and what started out as
things in life and what started out as just a fun running friendship has turned
just a fun running friendship has turned
just a fun running friendship has turned into true mentorship I’ve invited her to
into true mentorship I’ve invited her to
into true mentorship I’ve invited her to networking breakfasts she’s come and
networking breakfasts she’s come and
networking breakfasts she’s come and seen how I’ve just Liat led my life and
seen how I’ve just Liat led my life and
seen how I’ve just Liat led my life and as a parent as a professor as someone in
as a parent as a professor as someone in
as a parent as a professor as someone in the community and I’ve had the
the community and I’ve had the
the community and I’ve had the opportunity to introduce her to people
opportunity to introduce her to people
opportunity to introduce her to people like say another parent on the hockey
like say another parent on the hockey
like say another parent on the hockey team who’s also an attorney and help
team who’s also an attorney and help
team who’s also an attorney and help Lauren see what might come next so
Lauren see what might come next so
Lauren see what might come next so Taylor is not the only one who’s told me
Taylor is not the only one who’s told me
Taylor is not the only one who’s told me how important I am in helping Lauren I
how important I am in helping Lauren I
how important I am in helping Lauren I introduced Lauren to a colleague they
introduced Lauren to a colleague they
introduced Lauren to a colleague they went out to one of the best ice cream
went out to one of the best ice cream
went out to one of the best ice cream shops and Baltimore and had a
shops and Baltimore and had a
shops and Baltimore and had a conversation colleague tells me
conversation colleague tells me
conversation colleague tells me afterwards it’s clear how much your
afterwards it’s clear how much your
afterwards it’s clear how much your relationship matters to learn and it’s a
relationship matters to learn and it’s a
relationship matters to learn and it’s a gift
gift
gift Carlin mother said that she appreciated
Carlin mother said that she appreciated
Carlin mother said that she appreciated how much I was there for Lauren and how
how much I was there for Lauren and how
how much I was there for Lauren and how Lauren appreciated my coming to see her
Lauren appreciated my coming to see her
Lauren appreciated my coming to see her law school graduation and being sworn in
law school graduation and being sworn in
law school graduation and being sworn in to the State Bar Lauren herself when I
to the State Bar Lauren herself when I
to the State Bar Lauren herself when I introduced her to someone is someone
introduced her to someone is someone
introduced her to someone is someone with whom I run she quickly added and on
with whom I run she quickly added and on
with whom I run she quickly added and on someone who Kevin Mentors
someone who Kevin Mentors
someone who Kevin Mentors and on the day she got sworn in to the
and on the day she got sworn in to the
and on the day she got sworn in to the bar she introduced me to the judge for
bar she introduced me to the judge for
bar she introduced me to the judge for whom she’s clerking and said this is one
whom she’s clerking and said this is one
whom she’s clerking and said this is one of my mentors that repeated introduction
of my mentors that repeated introduction
of my mentors that repeated introduction as mentor meant an awful lot to me to
as mentor meant an awful lot to me to
as mentor meant an awful lot to me to hear how important that was and it
hear how important that was and it
hear how important that was and it really made true that it’s in giving
really made true that it’s in giving
really made true that it’s in giving that I received something back now
that I received something back now
that I received something back now Lara’s not the only one who’s introduced
Lara’s not the only one who’s introduced
Lara’s not the only one who’s introduced me as mentor in a way that meant a lot
me as mentor in a way that meant a lot
me as mentor in a way that meant a lot to me
to me
to me this is Kelsey I met Kelsey when she was
this is Kelsey I met Kelsey when she was
this is Kelsey I met Kelsey when she was in high school she’s a flute player she
in high school she’s a flute player she
in high school she’s a flute player she left for college in the fall of 2014 and
left for college in the fall of 2014 and
left for college in the fall of 2014 and I’ve seen her just twice since then most
I’ve seen her just twice since then most
I’ve seen her just twice since then most recent time just before the new year
recent time just before the new year
recent time just before the new year this year and I saw her play at a
this year and I saw her play at a
this year and I saw her play at a benefit concert I went up to talk Terry
benefit concert I went up to talk Terry
benefit concert I went up to talk Terry afterwards and she introduced me saying
afterwards and she introduced me saying
afterwards and she introduced me saying Kevin is one of the biggest mentors I’ve
Kevin is one of the biggest mentors I’ve
Kevin is one of the biggest mentors I’ve ever had again that wasn’t how I got to
ever had again that wasn’t how I got to
ever had again that wasn’t how I got to know her originally so that was very
know her originally so that was very
know her originally so that was very meaningful to me and I responded with
meaningful to me and I responded with
meaningful to me and I responded with her by email afterwards as she said you
her by email afterwards as she said you
her by email afterwards as she said you know you’ve always supported me you’ve
know you’ve always supported me you’ve
know you’ve always supported me you’ve been a great help and even though we
been a great help and even though we
been a great help and even though we don’t see each other in person all it
don’t see each other in person all it
don’t see each other in person all it often you still a very positive
often you still a very positive
often you still a very positive influence on my life so that meant a lot
influence on my life so that meant a lot
influence on my life so that meant a lot now it’s not only in my
now it’s not only in my
now it’s not only in my personal life that I end up with
personal life that I end up with
personal life that I end up with unplanned mentoring some of the people
unplanned mentoring some of the people
unplanned mentoring some of the people who report directly to me I just manage
who report directly to me I just manage
who report directly to me I just manage but this is Mindy and Mindy is someone
but this is Mindy and Mindy is someone
but this is Mindy and Mindy is someone who I truly had a chance to mentor we’ve
who I truly had a chance to mentor we’ve
who I truly had a chance to mentor we’ve each had numerous serendipitous turns in
each had numerous serendipitous turns in
each had numerous serendipitous turns in our career that turned out for the
our career that turned out for the
our career that turned out for the better and one of those turns brought us
better and one of those turns brought us
better and one of those turns brought us together to work on the school’s
together to work on the school’s
together to work on the school’s accreditation so two years day in and
accreditation so two years day in and
accreditation so two years day in and day out we worked to get the school
day out we worked to get the school
day out we worked to get the school ready for accreditation and we were
ready for accreditation and we were
ready for accreditation and we were successful and at the end of that set of
successful and at the end of that set of
successful and at the end of that set of activities I said to her you know Mindy
activities I said to her you know Mindy
activities I said to her you know Mindy I’m glad I had a chance to work with you
I’m glad I had a chance to work with you
I’m glad I had a chance to work with you and open up your eyes to all kinds of
and open up your eyes to all kinds of
and open up your eyes to all kinds of things you might not have even seen in
things you might not have even seen in
things you might not have even seen in your career before his new possibilities
your career before his new possibilities
your career before his new possibilities and she appreciated the mentoring that
and she appreciated the mentoring that
and she appreciated the mentoring that I’d provided as well one of the things
I’d provided as well one of the things
I’d provided as well one of the things that I did was I forced a meeting with
that I did was I forced a meeting with
that I did was I forced a meeting with someone who has a job similar to hers
someone who has a job similar to hers
someone who has a job similar to hers but at the university level rather than
but at the university level rather than
but at the university level rather than the school level and it wasn’t the first
the school level and it wasn’t the first
the school level and it wasn’t the first time she met this person but we’ve got
time she met this person but we’ve got
time she met this person but we’ve got to talk about big picture strategy what
to talk about big picture strategy what
to talk about big picture strategy what might come next and we at least alluded
might come next and we at least alluded
might come next and we at least alluded to mentoring now this other person
to mentoring now this other person
to mentoring now this other person didn’t say of course I’ll mentor you
didn’t say of course I’ll mentor you
didn’t say of course I’ll mentor you Mindy but afterwards I talked with Mindy
Mindy but afterwards I talked with Mindy
Mindy but afterwards I talked with Mindy and I said you know go meet her a few
and I said you know go meet her a few
and I said you know go meet her a few more times
more times
more times see if she offers you advice see if what
see if she offers you advice see if what
see if she offers you advice see if what might begin as an informal mentoring
might begin as an informal mentoring
might begin as an informal mentoring could evolve into something as you go
could evolve into something as you go
could evolve into something as you go along and Mindy appreciated getting that
along and Mindy appreciated getting that
along and Mindy appreciated getting that advice recognizing that people don’t
advice recognizing that people don’t
advice recognizing that people don’t always jump at the first opportunity to
always jump at the first opportunity to
always jump at the first opportunity to mentor someone else I just hope I get to
mentor someone else I just hope I get to
mentor someone else I just hope I get to continue working with her continuing
continue working with her continuing
continue working with her continuing mentoring her and continue to find other
mentoring her and continue to find other
mentoring her and continue to find other people who might meant to her so she can
people who might meant to her so she can
people who might meant to her so she can be all that she aspires to be in her
be all that she aspires to be in her
be all that she aspires to be in her career this is Elizabeth another
career this is Elizabeth another
career this is Elizabeth another workplace example when I got promoted to
workplace example when I got promoted to
workplace example when I got promoted to full professor when I was back at the
full professor when I was back at the
full professor when I was back at the Bloomberg School of Public Health
Bloomberg School of Public Health
Bloomberg School of Public Health I recognized they gave me great
I recognized they gave me great
I recognized they gave me great mentoring when I was an assistant
mentoring when I was an assistant
mentoring when I was an assistant professor great mentoring as an
professor great mentoring as an
professor great mentoring as an associate professor but no mentoring
associate professor but no mentoring
associate professor but no mentoring when you’re a full professor and so
when you’re a full professor and so
when you’re a full professor and so Elizabeth and I talked to each other and
Elizabeth and I talked to each other and
Elizabeth and I talked to each other and she was a couple years ahead of me in
she was a couple years ahead of me in
she was a couple years ahead of me in her career he said you know maybe we
her career he said you know maybe we
her career he said you know maybe we should be peer mentors so now we see
should be peer mentors so now we see
should be peer mentors so now we see each other maybe just once or twice a
each other maybe just once or twice a
each other maybe just once or twice a year in person for coffee or lunch but
year in person for coffee or lunch but
year in person for coffee or lunch but we recognize that the other is no more
we recognize that the other is no more
we recognize that the other is no more than a phone call away if we need advice
than a phone call away if we need advice
than a phone call away if we need advice on something and we’ve done that
on something and we’ve done that
on something and we’ve done that multiple times she’s helped me think
multiple times she’s helped me think
multiple times she’s helped me think about what might be my next step after
about what might be my next step after
about what might be my next step after vice dean and how might I get there and
vice dean and how might I get there and
vice dean and how might I get there and I’ve helped her think about maybe she
I’ve helped her think about maybe she
I’ve helped her think about maybe she doesn’t need to become the next thing
doesn’t need to become the next thing
doesn’t need to become the next thing maybe she can just keep doing what she’s
maybe she can just keep doing what she’s
maybe she can just keep doing what she’s doing now but do it better and in new
doing now but do it better and in new
doing now but do it better and in new ways mentor more PhD students mentor
ways mentor more PhD students mentor
ways mentor more PhD students mentor more junior faculty bring together
more junior faculty bring together
more junior faculty bring together research
research
research in different areas to make connections
in different areas to make connections
in different areas to make connections that wouldn’t have been made before and
that wouldn’t have been made before and
that wouldn’t have been made before and have her impact that way so those are
have her impact that way so those are
have her impact that way so those are interesting relationships that emerged
interesting relationships that emerged
interesting relationships that emerged organically sometimes relationships are
organically sometimes relationships are
organically sometimes relationships are set up to be mentoring in the first
set up to be mentoring in the first
set up to be mentoring in the first place this is Molly
place this is Molly
place this is Molly Molly’s an undergraduate senior in the
Molly’s an undergraduate senior in the
Molly’s an undergraduate senior in the economics department at Johns Hopkins
economics department at Johns Hopkins
economics department at Johns Hopkins she was introduced to me by one of her
she was introduced to me by one of her
she was introduced to me by one of her friends with a phrase like Kevin’s
friends with a phrase like Kevin’s
friends with a phrase like Kevin’s somebody who’s always great to talk to
somebody who’s always great to talk to
somebody who’s always great to talk to again a flattering way to be introduced
again a flattering way to be introduced
again a flattering way to be introduced to someone and Molly and I have had a
to someone and Molly and I have had a
to someone and Molly and I have had a couple in-person conversations the first
couple in-person conversations the first
couple in-person conversations the first one was an hour she said here’s my set
one was an hour she said here’s my set
one was an hour she said here’s my set of interest helped me think about this
of interest helped me think about this
of interest helped me think about this and I did and then a couple months later
and I did and then a couple months later
and I did and then a couple months later so I’m having an existential crisis I
so I’m having an existential crisis I
so I’m having an existential crisis I don’t know what I’m gonna do after I
don’t know what I’m gonna do after I
don’t know what I’m gonna do after I graduate we probably all felt that way
graduate we probably all felt that way
graduate we probably all felt that way at some point and we talked and I set
at some point and we talked and I set
at some point and we talked and I set her up to talk to one of my former PhD
her up to talk to one of my former PhD
her up to talk to one of my former PhD students who is an economist working in
students who is an economist working in
students who is an economist working in the real world and that helps her to get
the real world and that helps her to get
the real world and that helps her to get an understanding of what do economists
an understanding of what do economists
an understanding of what do economists really do once they have their degrees
really do once they have their degrees
really do once they have their degrees recently she had a opportunity to
recently she had a opportunity to
recently she had a opportunity to interview with a firm that actually
interview with a firm that actually
interview with a firm that actually works in health economics she got the
works in health economics she got the
works in health economics she got the job offer and it’s looking like she’s
job offer and it’s looking like she’s
job offer and it’s looking like she’s going to move to Denver to take the job
going to move to Denver to take the job
going to move to Denver to take the job so it was nice to be able to have that
so it was nice to be able to have that
so it was nice to be able to have that impact now she’s not the only
impact now she’s not the only
impact now she’s not the only undergraduate I mentor I mentor to
undergraduate I mentor I mentor to
undergraduate I mentor I mentor to undergraduates at Penn State my
undergraduates at Penn State my
undergraduates at Penn State my undergraduate alma mater
undergraduate alma mater
undergraduate alma mater this is ramesha I first met Maurice at
this is ramesha I first met Maurice at
this is ramesha I first met Maurice at Rome ISA when she was introduced on the
Rome ISA when she was introduced on the
Rome ISA when she was introduced on the old Schreyer Honors College Dean’s
old Schreyer Honors College Dean’s
old Schreyer Honors College Dean’s Facebook page started in Bangladesh came
Facebook page started in Bangladesh came
Facebook page started in Bangladesh came to Penn State at one of their branch
to Penn State at one of their branch
to Penn State at one of their branch campuses eventually moved to their main
campuses eventually moved to their main
campuses eventually moved to their main campus she’s a biomedical engineering
campus she’s a biomedical engineering
campus she’s a biomedical engineering major and I wrote her I found her in the
major and I wrote her I found her in the
major and I wrote her I found her in the Penn State directory wrote a little
Penn State directory wrote a little
Penn State directory wrote a little email to her said how are you doing now
email to her said how are you doing now
email to her said how are you doing now that you’ve you know gotten all this
that you’ve you know gotten all this
that you’ve you know gotten all this attention she said you know I’m still
attention she said you know I’m still
attention she said you know I’m still having my ups and downs I said okay well
having my ups and downs I said okay well
having my ups and downs I said okay well you know I can try to be an informal
you know I can try to be an informal
you know I can try to be an informal mentor for you so for the last year
mentor for you so for the last year
mentor for you so for the last year we’ve corresponded you know I’ve helped
we’ve corresponded you know I’ve helped
we’ve corresponded you know I’ve helped her to remain confident about what’s
her to remain confident about what’s
her to remain confident about what’s going to come next
going to come next
going to come next I’ve helped her to see what
I’ve helped her to see what
I’ve helped her to see what opportunities there may be with her
opportunities there may be with her
opportunities there may be with her degree and she’s you know very happy to
degree and she’s you know very happy to
degree and she’s you know very happy to have someone just bounce ideas off of
have someone just bounce ideas off of
have someone just bounce ideas off of I’ve also introduced her to my other
I’ve also introduced her to my other
I’ve also introduced her to my other undergraduate personal mentor and this
undergraduate personal mentor and this
undergraduate personal mentor and this is marine marine was introduced to me
is marine marine was introduced to me
is marine marine was introduced to me through a formal Honors College
through a formal Honors College
through a formal Honors College mentoring process as an alumnus of the
mentoring process as an alumnus of the
mentoring process as an alumnus of the Honors College and the first time I
Honors College and the first time I
Honors College and the first time I talked to the range said you just make
talked to the range said you just make
talked to the range said you just make me feel completely comfortable when I’m
me feel completely comfortable when I’m
me feel completely comfortable when I’m talking to you again that’s a very
talking to you again that’s a very
talking to you again that’s a very flattering statement to hear about
flattering statement to hear about
flattering statement to hear about myself and I
myself and I
myself and I she ate that feed back and she said she
she ate that feed back and she said she
she ate that feed back and she said she had other mentors who hadn’t made her
had other mentors who hadn’t made her
had other mentors who hadn’t made her feel that way in the six months or so
feel that way in the six months or so
feel that way in the six months or so that we’ve been corresponding back and
that we’ve been corresponding back and
that we’ve been corresponding back and forth I also did a Skype session with
forth I also did a Skype session with
forth I also did a Skype session with her where I helped her anticipate what
her where I helped her anticipate what
her where I helped her anticipate what types of questions she might get in her
types of questions she might get in her
types of questions she might get in her interviews for her summer internships
interviews for her summer internships
interviews for her summer internships that she’s gotten a couple offers from
that she’s gotten a couple offers from
that she’s gotten a couple offers from those so again I am very glad that I was
those so again I am very glad that I was
those so again I am very glad that I was able to make that difference now I have
able to make that difference now I have
able to make that difference now I have a history of mentoring people in the
a history of mentoring people in the
a history of mentoring people in the Schreyer Honors College and this is
Schreyer Honors College and this is
Schreyer Honors College and this is Rachel Rachel is one of the first people
Rachel Rachel is one of the first people
Rachel Rachel is one of the first people I ever mentored in the Schreyer Honors
I ever mentored in the Schreyer Honors
I ever mentored in the Schreyer Honors College introduced to her in the fall of
College introduced to her in the fall of
College introduced to her in the fall of 2009 first time I met her in person I
2009 first time I met her in person I
2009 first time I met her in person I was up at Penn State met her after a
was up at Penn State met her after a
was up at Penn State met her after a class we’re walking to the ice cream
class we’re walking to the ice cream
class we’re walking to the ice cream store on campus and she tells me I want
store on campus and she tells me I want
store on campus and she tells me I want to be a bio behavioral health and music
to be a bio behavioral health and music
to be a bio behavioral health and music composition double major and become a
composition double major and become a
composition double major and become a physician so I have to admit I scratched
physician so I have to admit I scratched
physician so I have to admit I scratched my head for a moment on that one and I
my head for a moment on that one and I
my head for a moment on that one and I said so what do you want to do open up a
said so what do you want to do open up a
said so what do you want to do open up a music therapy practice someday she kind
music therapy practice someday she kind
music therapy practice someday she kind of chuckled at that and I said you know
of chuckled at that and I said you know
of chuckled at that and I said you know I’m just trying to open your eyes to how
I’m just trying to open your eyes to how
I’m just trying to open your eyes to how you might make connections in ways you
you might make connections in ways you
you might make connections in ways you hadn’t thought about otherwise she
hadn’t thought about otherwise she
hadn’t thought about otherwise she appreciated that and after many
appreciated that and after many
appreciated that and after many discussions and many decisions she
discussions and many decisions she
discussions and many decisions she actually evolved over time to take a job
actually evolved over time to take a job
actually evolved over time to take a job at a professional organization that does
at a professional organization that does
at a professional organization that does Health Services Research and policy
Health Services Research and policy
Health Services Research and policy which is what I was doing when I met her
which is what I was doing when I met her
which is what I was doing when I met her I didn’t force her down that path but I
I didn’t force her down that path but I
I didn’t force her down that path but I was honored to serve as a guide as she
was honored to serve as a guide as she
was honored to serve as a guide as she went down that path and evolved over
went down that path and evolved over
went down that path and evolved over time and she appreciates the almost
time and she appreciates the almost
time and she appreciates the almost eight years now that we’ve known each
eight years now that we’ve known each
eight years now that we’ve known each other and the fact that I share back
other and the fact that I share back
other and the fact that I share back with her all the things that I’ve
with her all the things that I’ve
with her all the things that I’ve learned from her along the way as well
learned from her along the way as well
learned from her along the way as well as helping to guide her in her decisions
as helping to guide her in her decisions
as helping to guide her in her decisions I also want to talk about a one-off
I also want to talk about a one-off
I also want to talk about a one-off mentoring relationship so I decided late
mentoring relationship so I decided late
mentoring relationship so I decided late to run the Baltimore marathon in the
to run the Baltimore marathon in the
to run the Baltimore marathon in the fall of 2016 I wanted one of these cool
fall of 2016 I wanted one of these cool
fall of 2016 I wanted one of these cool crab medals that they were handing out
crab medals that they were handing out
crab medals that they were handing out and so it was late enough in the process
and so it was late enough in the process
and so it was late enough in the process that I wasn’t gonna train much harder
that I wasn’t gonna train much harder
that I wasn’t gonna train much harder and I said I could probably run about
and I said I could probably run about
and I said I could probably run about three hours and 30 minutes it was my
three hours and 30 minutes it was my
three hours and 30 minutes it was my ninth marathon so Elizabeth is in a
ninth marathon so Elizabeth is in a
ninth marathon so Elizabeth is in a running group that I’m in I knew it was
running group that I’m in I knew it was
running group that I’m in I knew it was going to be her first I said Elizabeth
going to be her first I said Elizabeth
going to be her first I said Elizabeth what time do you want to run she said
what time do you want to run she said
what time do you want to run she said about 3:30 I said great I’m planning to
about 3:30 I said great I’m planning to
about 3:30 I said great I’m planning to run that time do you want to run with me
run that time do you want to run with me
run that time do you want to run with me and she said sure I’d love to have the
and she said sure I’d love to have the
and she said sure I’d love to have the company so for three hours 28 minutes
company so for three hours 28 minutes
company so for three hours 28 minutes and 26 seconds we ran side-by-side and
and 26 seconds we ran side-by-side and
and 26 seconds we ran side-by-side and finished the marathon together and it
finished the marathon together and it
finished the marathon together and it was humbling to think that I had helped
was humbling to think that I had helped
was humbling to think that I had helped her not only to achieve her goal but
her not only to achieve her goal but
her not only to achieve her goal but her goal that I’d haven’t done much
her goal that I’d haven’t done much
her goal that I’d haven’t done much mentoring for her other net but I did
mentoring for her other net but I did
mentoring for her other net but I did offer a four pieces of advice for the
offer a four pieces of advice for the
offer a four pieces of advice for the race that I think are good pieces of
race that I think are good pieces of
race that I think are good pieces of advice for mentoring in general don’t
advice for mentoring in general don’t
advice for mentoring in general don’t start too fast once you’re comfortable
start too fast once you’re comfortable
start too fast once you’re comfortable it’s okay to speed up work through those
it’s okay to speed up work through those
it’s okay to speed up work through those hills in the middle of the race and when
hills in the middle of the race and when
hills in the middle of the race and when you’re close to the finish you can’t
you’re close to the finish you can’t
you’re close to the finish you can’t give up she appreciated both the advice
give up she appreciated both the advice
give up she appreciated both the advice and the companionship during the run and
and the companionship during the run and
and the companionship during the run and I said well do one thing for me then I
I said well do one thing for me then I
I said well do one thing for me then I was paying forward somebody two years
was paying forward somebody two years
was paying forward somebody two years earlier running with me for my best
earlier running with me for my best
earlier running with me for my best marathon anybody ever asks you to run a
marathon anybody ever asks you to run a
marathon anybody ever asks you to run a marathon with him return the favor so
marathon with him return the favor so
marathon with him return the favor so I’d also like to share just a couple of
I’d also like to share just a couple of
I’d also like to share just a couple of other facts about mentoring this is a
other facts about mentoring this is a
other facts about mentoring this is a thank-you note from one of my last mph
thank-you note from one of my last mph
thank-you note from one of my last mph students I shared with her five words
students I shared with her five words
students I shared with her five words that were really motivating in my life
that were really motivating in my life
that were really motivating in my life she bought me the stones with the words
she bought me the stones with the words
she bought me the stones with the words on them and sent me a thank-you note
on them and sent me a thank-you note
on them and sent me a thank-you note describing how she saw me live out each
describing how she saw me live out each
describing how she saw me live out each of those words it was really touching to
of those words it was really touching to
of those words it was really touching to have someone do that for me and reflect
have someone do that for me and reflect
have someone do that for me and reflect on how she could see those words in her
on how she could see those words in her
on how she could see those words in her own life I’ve also had a couple MBA
own life I’ve also had a couple MBA
own life I’ve also had a couple MBA students tell me amazing things like you
students tell me amazing things like you
students tell me amazing things like you said an example for me as I go on to
said an example for me as I go on to
said an example for me as I go on to pursue my PhD or you’re a great
pursue my PhD or you’re a great
pursue my PhD or you’re a great connector and clearly that’s helped you
connector and clearly that’s helped you
connector and clearly that’s helped you in your career
in your career
in your career and I have a junior research colleague
and I have a junior research colleague
and I have a junior research colleague who told me that my support during her
who told me that my support during her
who told me that my support during her time of uncertainty was sustaining for
time of uncertainty was sustaining for
time of uncertainty was sustaining for her these are all just comments that you
her these are all just comments that you
her these are all just comments that you know it’s helped me understand what it
know it’s helped me understand what it
know it’s helped me understand what it means to be perceived as a good mentor
means to be perceived as a good mentor
means to be perceived as a good mentor to others so how do I tie this all
to others so how do I tie this all
to others so how do I tie this all together in a meaningful way
together in a meaningful way
together in a meaningful way first thing is enthusiasm I think my
first thing is enthusiasm I think my
first thing is enthusiasm I think my enthusiasm makes me more approachable as
enthusiasm makes me more approachable as
enthusiasm makes me more approachable as a mentor I don’t just get excited about
a mentor I don’t just get excited about
a mentor I don’t just get excited about mentoring when I’m up here giving a TEDx
mentoring when I’m up here giving a TEDx
mentoring when I’m up here giving a TEDx talk I get excited about mentoring
talk I get excited about mentoring
talk I get excited about mentoring whenever I talk about it it’s so
whenever I talk about it it’s so
whenever I talk about it it’s so essential in my life that when I ran a
essential in my life that when I ran a
essential in my life that when I ran a 2-person marathon relay one time with
2-person marathon relay one time with
2-person marathon relay one time with that last MPH student of mine we named
that last MPH student of mine we named
that last MPH student of mine we named our team who’s the mentor because I had
our team who’s the mentor because I had
our team who’s the mentor because I had mentored her in public health and she
mentored her in public health and she
mentored her in public health and she had mentioned me about running I love it
had mentioned me about running I love it
had mentioned me about running I love it when my mentees get a chance to meet
when my mentees get a chance to meet
when my mentees get a chance to meet each other especially having introduced
each other especially having introduced
each other especially having introduced from ISA and Noreen they sent me this
from ISA and Noreen they sent me this
from ISA and Noreen they sent me this great picture of the two of them it’s
great picture of the two of them it’s
great picture of the two of them it’s like probably exchanging notes about me
like probably exchanging notes about me
like probably exchanging notes about me I’m not sure what they said but
I’m not sure what they said but
I’m not sure what they said but hopefully good things and it’s just
hopefully good things and it’s just
hopefully good things and it’s just really exciting to think about what
really exciting to think about what
really exciting to think about what enthusiasm can do because I was at a
enthusiasm can do because I was at a
enthusiasm can do because I was at a Carey women in business conversation
Carey women in business conversation
Carey women in business conversation where somebody said well I actually had
where somebody said well I actually had
where somebody said well I actually had to ask somebody to mention me one time
to ask somebody to mention me one time
to ask somebody to mention me one time and it felt like asking somebody to prom
and it felt like asking somebody to prom
and it felt like asking somebody to prom it shouldn’t feel that hard
it shouldn’t feel that hard
it shouldn’t feel that hard if the person is really excited and
if the person is really excited and
if the person is really excited and enthusiastic about mentoring second
enthusiastic about mentoring second
enthusiastic about mentoring second characteristic and my successful
characteristic and my successful
characteristic and my successful mentoring relationships is empathy I
mentoring relationships is empathy I
mentoring relationships is empathy I think that empathy also helps to make me
think that empathy also helps to make me
think that empathy also helps to make me approachable because I have a former
approachable because I have a former
approachable because I have a former direct report to me who said you’re the
direct report to me who said you’re the
direct report to me who said you’re the most empathetic supervisor I’ve ever had
most empathetic supervisor I’ve ever had
most empathetic supervisor I’ve ever had don’t lose that characteristic and I
don’t lose that characteristic and I
don’t lose that characteristic and I take that advice and that recognition to
take that advice and that recognition to
take that advice and that recognition to heart empathy is something again makes
heart empathy is something again makes
heart empathy is something again makes me more approachable because I’ve had my
me more approachable because I’ve had my
me more approachable because I’ve had my own ups and downs I had and still have
own ups and downs I had and still have
own ups and downs I had and still have massive uncertainties in my life and I’m
massive uncertainties in my life and I’m
massive uncertainties in my life and I’m just human and I let my mentees know
just human and I let my mentees know
just human and I let my mentees know that the third thing is curiosity okay
that the third thing is curiosity okay
that the third thing is curiosity okay until I’m entered Lauren I didn’t know a
until I’m entered Lauren I didn’t know a
until I’m entered Lauren I didn’t know a thing about being a law student or
thing about being a law student or
thing about being a law student or taking the bar or being an attorney but
taking the bar or being an attorney but
taking the bar or being an attorney but when you run with somebody every week
when you run with somebody every week
when you run with somebody every week for their three years of law school you
for their three years of law school you
for their three years of law school you learn an awful lot about being a law
learn an awful lot about being a law
learn an awful lot about being a law student I didn’t know the first thing
student I didn’t know the first thing
student I didn’t know the first thing about baroque flute until I mentored
about baroque flute until I mentored
about baroque flute until I mentored Kelsey and I’ve learned things about
Kelsey and I’ve learned things about
Kelsey and I’ve learned things about flute as well curiosity is key because
flute as well curiosity is key because
flute as well curiosity is key because I’m not an expert in everything but I
I’m not an expert in everything but I
I’m not an expert in everything but I think I can mentor pretty people pretty
think I can mentor pretty people pretty
think I can mentor pretty people pretty well no matter what they’re doing but my
well no matter what they’re doing but my
well no matter what they’re doing but my lifelong love of learning and my
lifelong love of learning and my
lifelong love of learning and my curiosity gives me the opportunity to
curiosity gives me the opportunity to
curiosity gives me the opportunity to learn about their passions and offer
learn about their passions and offer
learn about their passions and offer them useful advice back then there’s
them useful advice back then there’s
them useful advice back then there’s connections of course it helps to have
connections of course it helps to have
connections of course it helps to have connections I gave the example of
connections I gave the example of
connections I gave the example of setting Lauren up to talk with another
setting Lauren up to talk with another
setting Lauren up to talk with another attorney who I know but I also like
attorney who I know but I also like
attorney who I know but I also like dreaming up in making new connections
dreaming up in making new connections
dreaming up in making new connections one of those networking breakfasts one
one of those networking breakfasts one
one of those networking breakfasts one side of me I’ve got the student who said
side of me I’ve got the student who said
side of me I’ve got the student who said you’re a great connector the other side
you’re a great connector the other side
you’re a great connector the other side of me across the table I’ve got a
of me across the table I’ve got a
of me across the table I’ve got a gentleman who’s working in a family
gentleman who’s working in a family
gentleman who’s working in a family stabilization organization working with
stabilization organization working with
stabilization organization working with Baltimore City Public Schools he says
Baltimore City Public Schools he says
Baltimore City Public Schools he says you know I need some more managerial
you know I need some more managerial
you know I need some more managerial skills maybe I should get an MBA well
skills maybe I should get an MBA well
skills maybe I should get an MBA well just so happens that that former MBA
just so happens that that former MBA
just so happens that that former MBA student is working for a local
student is working for a local
student is working for a local not-for-profit that finds talent and
not-for-profit that finds talent and
not-for-profit that finds talent and places it in other local not-for-profits
places it in other local not-for-profits
places it in other local not-for-profits and she earned her MBA along the way I
and she earned her MBA along the way I
and she earned her MBA along the way I said you two really ought to talk to
said you two really ought to talk to
said you two really ought to talk to each other and so I can’t always finish
each other and so I can’t always finish
each other and so I can’t always finish building the bridge but anytime there’s
building the bridge but anytime there’s
building the bridge but anytime there’s an opportunity to build a bridge I like
an opportunity to build a bridge I like
an opportunity to build a bridge I like to make sure I start and finally there’s
to make sure I start and finally there’s
to make sure I start and finally there’s vulnerability I have to let myself be
vulnerability I have to let myself be
vulnerability I have to let myself be vulnerable to be a good mentor I don’t
vulnerable to be a good mentor I don’t
vulnerable to be a good mentor I don’t know whether everybody’s gonna like my
know whether everybody’s gonna like my
know whether everybody’s gonna like my type of mentoring they might or might
type of mentoring they might or might
type of mentoring they might or might not those who do are they going to take
not those who do are they going to take
not those who do are they going to take every piece of advice I offer probably
every piece of advice I offer probably
every piece of advice I offer probably not if they do is that always going to
not if they do is that always going to
not if they do is that always going to work I can assure you it’s not
work I can assure you it’s not
work I can assure you it’s not and even if it does work are they always
and even if it does work are they always
and even if it does work are they always going to go to the direction that I
going to go to the direction that I
going to go to the direction that I would have suggested again probably not
would have suggested again probably not
would have suggested again probably not all of those things I can’t let bother
all of those things I can’t let bother
all of those things I can’t let bother me the joy is in developing the
me the joy is in developing the
me the joy is in developing the relationship the joy is in seeing that
relationship the joy is in seeing that
relationship the joy is in seeing that they’re trying and the joy isn’t seeing
they’re trying and the joy isn’t seeing
they’re trying and the joy isn’t seeing their success whatever that means
their success whatever that means
their success whatever that means how do I tie this all together okay I
how do I tie this all together okay I
how do I tie this all together okay I tie it all together with this statement
tie it all together with this statement
tie it all together with this statement my successful mentoring experiences are
my successful mentoring experiences are
my successful mentoring experiences are ones in which I commit myself to be
ones in which I commit myself to be
ones in which I commit myself to be vulnerable and use my enthusiasm and
vulnerable and use my enthusiasm and
vulnerable and use my enthusiasm and empathy as well as my curiosity and
empathy as well as my curiosity and
empathy as well as my curiosity and connections to facilitate my mentees
connections to facilitate my mentees
connections to facilitate my mentees development in the hope that she will do
development in the hope that she will do
development in the hope that she will do the same for someone else in the future
the same for someone else in the future
the same for someone else in the future or a lot more simply and where I began
or a lot more simply and where I began
or a lot more simply and where I began commit to make a difference for one that
commit to make a difference for one that
commit to make a difference for one that will be translated into a difference for
will be translated into a difference for
will be translated into a difference for others what I want you to do with all
others what I want you to do with all
others what I want you to do with all this couple things I’ve given you my
this couple things I’ve given you my
this couple things I’ve given you my model for mentoring but I’m not saying
model for mentoring but I’m not saying
model for mentoring but I’m not saying this is the model that’s going to work
this is the model that’s going to work
this is the model that’s going to work for everybody but if you’re looking to
for everybody but if you’re looking to
for everybody but if you’re looking to be a mentor or need mentoring think
be a mentor or need mentoring think
be a mentor or need mentoring think about what is the model that works for
about what is the model that works for
about what is the model that works for you when you figured out that model
you when you figured out that model
you when you figured out that model recognize that not all mentoring
recognize that not all mentoring
recognize that not all mentoring relationships need to be formal some of
relationships need to be formal some of
relationships need to be formal some of the most exciting ones that I described
the most exciting ones that I described
the most exciting ones that I described to you were the informal mentoring
to you were the informal mentoring
to you were the informal mentoring relationships you’re at least ones who
relationships you’re at least ones who
relationships you’re at least ones who started informally and recognized there
started informally and recognized there
started informally and recognized there might be all kinds of people out there
might be all kinds of people out there
might be all kinds of people out there who can help you even if you don’t label
who can help you even if you don’t label
who can help you even if you don’t label them mentor sometimes you need to make
them mentor sometimes you need to make
them mentor sometimes you need to make that transition from informal to formal
that transition from informal to formal
that transition from informal to formal to make the mentoring more meaningful
to make the mentoring more meaningful
to make the mentoring more meaningful and if you need to do that don’t be
and if you need to do that don’t be
and if you need to do that don’t be afraid to ask somebody to take that next
afraid to ask somebody to take that next
afraid to ask somebody to take that next step and formalize it and hopefully it
step and formalize it and hopefully it
step and formalize it and hopefully it is easier than asking somebody to prom
is easier than asking somebody to prom
is easier than asking somebody to prom and then finally whether it’s formal or
and then finally whether it’s formal or
and then finally whether it’s formal or informal if you have people who have
informal if you have people who have
informal if you have people who have helped to in your development and
helped to in your development and
helped to in your development and advance your development tell them what
advance your development tell them what
advance your development tell them what it means to you
it means to you
it means to you because I can assure you it will be as
because I can assure you it will be as
because I can assure you it will be as meaningful for them and they will feel
meaningful for them and they will feel
meaningful for them and they will feel like they have received a gift as a gift
like they have received a gift as a gift
like they have received a gift as a gift that they’ve given you through mentoring
that they’ve given you through mentoring
that they’ve given you through mentoring thank you
thank you
thank you [Applause]
”
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