people with very different ideological viewpoints founded this country they
viewpoints founded this country they
viewpoints founded this country they approach the American experiment hoping
approach the American experiment hoping
approach the American experiment hoping for different outcomes as you know some
for different outcomes as you know some
for different outcomes as you know some of them wanted to go back to what was
of them wanted to go back to what was
of them wanted to go back to what was going on in Britain others wanted what
going on in Britain others wanted what
going on in Britain others wanted what we call one-man one-vote some of them
we call one-man one-vote some of them
we call one-man one-vote some of them wanted to keep slavery and others wanted
wanted to keep slavery and others wanted
wanted to keep slavery and others wanted to abolish it these ideas eventually
to abolish it these ideas eventually
to abolish it these ideas eventually converged in what we know as America
converged in what we know as America
converged in what we know as America Civil War the blood is war in our
Civil War the blood is war in our
Civil War the blood is war in our history and while that war officially
history and while that war officially
history and while that war officially ended in 1865 it has continued to be
ended in 1865 it has continued to be
ended in 1865 it has continued to be litigated by each succeeding generation
litigated by each succeeding generation
litigated by each succeeding generation since then through the means of politics
since then through the means of politics
since then through the means of politics up into our time for example today we
up into our time for example today we
up into our time for example today we have gay straight pro-life pro-choice 1%
have gay straight pro-life pro-choice 1%
have gay straight pro-life pro-choice 1% 99% black lives matter all lives matter
99% black lives matter all lives matter
99% black lives matter all lives matter saved lost red state blue state this is
saved lost red state blue state this is
saved lost red state blue state this is the difference divided and as you know
the difference divided and as you know
the difference divided and as you know it’s expanding by the moment
it’s expanding by the moment
it’s expanding by the moment authorization which is the minimization
authorization which is the minimization
authorization which is the minimization denigration and categorization of people
denigration and categorization of people
denigration and categorization of people who happen to disagree with me has
who happen to disagree with me has
who happen to disagree with me has become a national habit there is one
become a national habit there is one
become a national habit there is one point upon which we all agree however
point upon which we all agree however
point upon which we all agree however according to a recent CNN survey eighty
according to a recent CNN survey eighty
according to a recent CNN survey eighty five percent of us Democrats Republicans
five percent of us Democrats Republicans
five percent of us Democrats Republicans and independents believe that our
and independents believe that our
and independents believe that our country is more divided than ever here’s
country is more divided than ever here’s
country is more divided than ever here’s something I know for sure this is a
something I know for sure this is a
something I know for sure this is a picture of an old woman now some of you
picture of an old woman now some of you
picture of an old woman now some of you have alternative facts and so you are
have alternative facts and so you are
have alternative facts and so you are seeing something different and some of
seeing something different and some of
seeing something different and some of you are fair and balanced so you see
you are fair and balanced so you see
you are fair and balanced so you see both this is the question how is it that
both this is the question how is it that
both this is the question how is it that two people can look at the same thing
two people can look at the same thing
two people can look at the same thing and come to two different conclusions it
and come to two different conclusions it
and come to two different conclusions it was in search of an answer to that
was in search of an answer to that
was in search of an answer to that question that initially launched me into
question that initially launched me into
question that initially launched me into the difference divide I was a pastor for
the difference divide I was a pastor for
the difference divide I was a pastor for 25 years and in that business
25 years and in that business
25 years and in that business we measure success by counting the
we measure success by counting the
we measure success by counting the number of people that sit opposite us on
number of people that sit opposite us on
number of people that sit opposite us on a Sunday morning at 11 o’clock and in
a Sunday morning at 11 o’clock and in
a Sunday morning at 11 o’clock and in that regards I was failures so I decided
that regards I was failures so I decided
that regards I was failures so I decided to
to
to start reading about how people did
start reading about how people did
start reading about how people did succeed and I began reading war books
succeed and I began reading war books
succeed and I began reading war books and business books and for more books I
and business books and for more books I
and business books and for more books I learned that if you want to win you have
learned that if you want to win you have
learned that if you want to win you have to study your enemy almost to the point
to study your enemy almost to the point
to study your enemy almost to the point of admiration and from business I
of admiration and from business I
of admiration and from business I learned that ultimately all paths lead
learned that ultimately all paths lead
learned that ultimately all paths lead to directly talking to the customer and
to directly talking to the customer and
to directly talking to the customer and so I decided to apply that in my own
so I decided to apply that in my own
so I decided to apply that in my own context and I formed my own secret
context and I formed my own secret
context and I formed my own secret shoppers and focus groups and I paid
shoppers and focus groups and I paid
shoppers and focus groups and I paid people to come to church because I
people to come to church because I
people to come to church because I couldn’t get him to come for free and I
couldn’t get him to come for free and I
couldn’t get him to come for free and I thought fine come I’ll pay you to come
thought fine come I’ll pay you to come
thought fine come I’ll pay you to come and critique me critique my sermon tell
and critique me critique my sermon tell
and critique me critique my sermon tell me everything about it that you don’t
me everything about it that you don’t
me everything about it that you don’t like I was trying to get a lay of the
like I was trying to get a lay of the
like I was trying to get a lay of the land on the difference divide I was
land on the difference divide I was
land on the difference divide I was trying to get a feel for the contour in
trying to get a feel for the contour in
trying to get a feel for the contour in the shape of them in me or us and them
the shape of them in me or us and them
the shape of them in me or us and them or all that that we do in our lives I
or all that that we do in our lives I
or all that that we do in our lives I wanted to take this research public so
wanted to take this research public so
wanted to take this research public so because I knew that 85% of pastors were
because I knew that 85% of pastors were
because I knew that 85% of pastors were suffering from the same dilemma I was
suffering from the same dilemma I was
suffering from the same dilemma I was and basically feeling like chronic
and basically feeling like chronic
and basically feeling like chronic failures and so I decided I want to
failures and so I decided I want to
failures and so I decided I want to gather them together and share this
gather them together and share this
gather them together and share this information with them now I don’t know
information with them now I don’t know
information with them now I don’t know about you but in our business we have a
about you but in our business we have a
about you but in our business we have a name we call people who don’t agree with
name we call people who don’t agree with
name we call people who don’t agree with us and we call them lost and in fact we
us and we call them lost and in fact we
us and we call them lost and in fact we call them the lost and so I was curious
call them the lost and so I was curious
call them the lost and so I was curious how the loss felt about the fact we were
how the loss felt about the fact we were
how the loss felt about the fact we were calling them this name you know of
calling them this name you know of
calling them this name you know of course we wouldn’t say this to their
course we wouldn’t say this to their
course we wouldn’t say this to their face because I would be rude but we use
face because I would be rude but we use
face because I would be rude but we use the term quite casually behind their
the term quite casually behind their
the term quite casually behind their backs maybe you have you know something
backs maybe you have you know something
backs maybe you have you know something in your domain that is similar and and
in your domain that is similar and and
in your domain that is similar and and so I put together an event with 500
so I put together an event with 500
so I put together an event with 500 pastors and three loss people I paid
pastors and three loss people I paid
pastors and three loss people I paid them and you can do a lot with money
them and you can do a lot with money
them and you can do a lot with money it’s awesome actually it’s really cheap
it’s awesome actually it’s really cheap
it’s awesome actually it’s really cheap you know it really pencils out and so I
you know it really pencils out and so I
you know it really pencils out and so I and I asked these three lost people in
and I asked these three lost people in
and I asked these three lost people in front of 500 pastors these questions do
front of 500 pastors these questions do
front of 500 pastors these questions do you feel lost no how does it feel when
you feel lost no how does it feel when
you feel lost no how does it feel when we call you lost not good not good and
we call you lost not good not good and
we call you lost not good not good and how could we improve you could stop
how could we improve you could stop
how could we improve you could stop talking as much and start list any more
talking as much and start list any more
talking as much and start list any more that would help okay what was I doing I
that would help okay what was I doing I
that would help okay what was I doing I was trying to give them the pastor’s a
was trying to give them the pastor’s a
was trying to give them the pastor’s a sense of the difference divide because
sense of the difference divide because
sense of the difference divide because in our business we’re trying to reach
in our business we’re trying to reach
in our business we’re trying to reach those people but we’re calling them a
those people but we’re calling them a
those people but we’re calling them a name can you imagine
name can you imagine
name can you imagine I’m sure you can I’m sure you can so as
I’m sure you can I’m sure you can so as
I’m sure you can I’m sure you can so as fate would have it about this time a
fate would have it about this time a
fate would have it about this time a young man an atheist was selling a soul
young man an atheist was selling a soul
young man an atheist was selling a soul in Chicago on eBay this happens all the
in Chicago on eBay this happens all the
in Chicago on eBay this happens all the time as you know and because I happen to
time as you know and because I happen to
time as you know and because I happen to be in the business of buying people and
be in the business of buying people and
be in the business of buying people and all that kind of thing I got wind to
all that kind of thing I got wind to
all that kind of thing I got wind to this offer and decided to bid and and
this offer and decided to bid and and
this offer and decided to bid and and the deal was for every ten dollars you
the deal was for every ten dollars you
the deal was for every ten dollars you bid he’d go to a church service I that’s
bid he’d go to a church service I that’s
bid he’d go to a church service I that’s really inexpensive the way that I count
really inexpensive the way that I count
really inexpensive the way that I count things so I got involved the bidding and
things so I got involved the bidding and
things so I got involved the bidding and won and I’m sure you’re curious about
won and I’m sure you’re curious about
won and I’m sure you’re curious about how much I paid is five hundred and four
how much I paid is five hundred and four
how much I paid is five hundred and four dollars and I’m sure you’re doing the
dollars and I’m sure you’re doing the
dollars and I’m sure you’re doing the math now that means that many owe me
math now that means that many owe me
math now that means that many owe me fifty church services okay I jumped on a
fifty church services okay I jumped on a
fifty church services okay I jumped on a plane went to Chicago to put the deal
plane went to Chicago to put the deal
plane went to Chicago to put the deal together on the meantime the Wall Street
together on the meantime the Wall Street
together on the meantime the Wall Street Journal got a hold of the story sent a
Journal got a hold of the story sent a
Journal got a hold of the story sent a reporter we all converge in Chicago at
reporter we all converge in Chicago at
reporter we all converge in Chicago at which point I reset the terms of the
which point I reset the terms of the
which point I reset the terms of the agreement I said to Hemet I said if I
agreement I said to Hemet I said if I
agreement I said to Hemet I said if I send you to 50 church services you’re
send you to 50 church services you’re
send you to 50 church services you’re going to hate me and so how about going
going to hate me and so how about going
going to hate me and so how about going to Chen tenter services and and will
to Chen tenter services and and will
to Chen tenter services and and will write for 50,000 people deal let’s do
write for 50,000 people deal let’s do
write for 50,000 people deal let’s do that so we formed an online community of
that so we formed an online community of
that so we formed an online community of people atheist Christians non-christians
people atheist Christians non-christians
people atheist Christians non-christians everybody in between
everybody in between
everybody in between and the we set the rules that we don’t
and the we set the rules that we don’t
and the we set the rules that we don’t allow debate we just were not interested
allow debate we just were not interested
allow debate we just were not interested in debate that’s been done it’s over go
in debate that’s been done it’s over go
in debate that’s been done it’s over go read a book about what we’re not doing
read a book about what we’re not doing
read a book about what we’re not doing is we don’t have to talk with each other
is we don’t have to talk with each other
is we don’t have to talk with each other we know how to be curious so again I’m
we know how to be curious so again I’m
we know how to be curious so again I’m trying to measure the space of the
trying to measure the space of the
trying to measure the space of the difference get the contour the lay of
difference get the contour the lay of
difference get the contour the lay of the land what can we do when you can’t
the land what can we do when you can’t
the land what can we do when you can’t do that when you’ve done what everybody
do that when you’ve done what everybody
do that when you’ve done what everybody else is trying on stein said that the
else is trying on stein said that the
else is trying on stein said that the the formulation of problem is often more
the formulation of problem is often more
the formulation of problem is often more important than its solution you know we
important than its solution you know we
important than its solution you know we have to think about this problem
have to think about this problem
have to think about this problem differently to get different results PR
differently to get different results PR
differently to get different results PR is very helpful because when this story
is very helpful because when this story
is very helpful because when this story got in the media for a while then I was
got in the media for a while then I was
got in the media for a while then I was contacted by a publisher who asked me if
contacted by a publisher who asked me if
contacted by a publisher who asked me if I’d be interested in writing a book with
I’d be interested in writing a book with
I’d be interested in writing a book with another atheist as an explorer you’re
another atheist as an explorer you’re
another atheist as an explorer you’re basically going from one island to
basically going from one island to
basically going from one island to another you don’t know where you’re
another you don’t know where you’re
another you don’t know where you’re going to end up next it’s just what how
going to end up next it’s just what how
going to end up next it’s just what how it works sorry so I was just wandering
it works sorry so I was just wandering
it works sorry so I was just wandering around not knowing what the next thing
around not knowing what the next thing
around not knowing what the next thing would be not even know there was a next
would be not even know there was a next
would be not even know there was a next thing and so I got got contacted with
thing and so I got got contacted with
thing and so I got got contacted with the publisher and they asked me if
the publisher and they asked me if
the publisher and they asked me if would write with an atheist I said yes
would write with an atheist I said yes
would write with an atheist I said yes so I hired another atheist out of San
so I hired another atheist out of San
so I hired another atheist out of San Diego named Matt Casper and together he
Diego named Matt Casper and together he
Diego named Matt Casper and together he and I wrote a book called Jimmy Kasper
and I wrote a book called Jimmy Kasper
and I wrote a book called Jimmy Kasper go to church where we wrote reviews of
go to church where we wrote reviews of
go to church where we wrote reviews of churches serve tisha Slee now there is
churches serve tisha Slee now there is
churches serve tisha Slee now there is nobody else doing this that I know of
nobody else doing this that I know of
nobody else doing this that I know of and it wasn’t picked up it was become a
and it wasn’t picked up it was become a
and it wasn’t picked up it was become a trend and nobody cared that we were
trend and nobody cared that we were
trend and nobody cared that we were there because who cares when you’re in a
there because who cares when you’re in a
there because who cares when you’re in a church of like 5,000 10,000 people just
church of like 5,000 10,000 people just
church of like 5,000 10,000 people just another face in the crowd so we were
another face in the crowd so we were
another face in the crowd so we were like Siskel and Ebert go to church think
like Siskel and Ebert go to church think
like Siskel and Ebert go to church think of it that way you know and we wrote the
of it that way you know and we wrote the
of it that way you know and we wrote the book it did fairly well and it found the
book it did fairly well and it found the
book it did fairly well and it found the hands it surprisingly of mega church
hands it surprisingly of mega church
hands it surprisingly of mega church pastors some of whom we wrote about we
pastors some of whom we wrote about we
pastors some of whom we wrote about we think what would they care about these
think what would they care about these
think what would they care about these two dumb guys are writing about them one
two dumb guys are writing about them one
two dumb guys are writing about them one of those pastors is a gentleman named
of those pastors is a gentleman named
of those pastors is a gentleman named Jim Powell and he got in touch with me
Jim Powell and he got in touch with me
Jim Powell and he got in touch with me the last summer to tell me about a
the last summer to tell me about a
the last summer to tell me about a friendship that he had gotten involved
friendship that he had gotten involved
friendship that he had gotten involved in with a Muslim Imam and a Jewish rabbi
in with a Muslim Imam and a Jewish rabbi
in with a Muslim Imam and a Jewish rabbi great here’s what makes it here’s what’s
great here’s what makes it here’s what’s
great here’s what makes it here’s what’s interesting Jim Powell is a
interesting Jim Powell is a
interesting Jim Powell is a self-described born-again evangelical
self-described born-again evangelical
self-described born-again evangelical living in the conservative heartland of
living in the conservative heartland of
living in the conservative heartland of Middle America Peoria Illinois that’s
Middle America Peoria Illinois that’s
Middle America Peoria Illinois that’s what makes it interesting and he and his
what makes it interesting and he and his
what makes it interesting and he and his rabbi and Muslim friend had forged a
rabbi and Muslim friend had forged a
rabbi and Muslim friend had forged a friendship over five years and then as
friendship over five years and then as
friendship over five years and then as the political climate as we know heated
the political climate as we know heated
the political climate as we know heated up they decided they need to go public
up they decided they need to go public
up they decided they need to go public with their friendship so in Peoria they
with their friendship so in Peoria they
with their friendship so in Peoria they put on a couple of large events called
put on a couple of large events called
put on a couple of large events called peace for Peoria invited the community
peace for Peoria invited the community
peace for Peoria invited the community the mayor caterpillars the largest
the mayor caterpillars the largest
the mayor caterpillars the largest employer the CEO came all those people
employer the CEO came all those people
employer the CEO came all those people came a thousand people showed up and
came a thousand people showed up and
came a thousand people showed up and they basically wanted to get on the
they basically wanted to get on the
they basically wanted to get on the right side of the issue saying we are
right side of the issue saying we are
right side of the issue saying we are for our Muslim neighbors and against
for our Muslim neighbors and against
for our Muslim neighbors and against Islamophobia so Jim told me about this
Islamophobia so Jim told me about this
Islamophobia so Jim told me about this story was interested in one know if I
story was interested in one know if I
story was interested in one know if I wanted to take the story to another
wanted to take the story to another
wanted to take the story to another level and I said I’d like to do that
level and I said I’d like to do that
level and I said I’d like to do that however it deserves more than a book I
however it deserves more than a book I
however it deserves more than a book I want to produce a documentary film and a
want to produce a documentary film and a
want to produce a documentary film and a book and I want to tour with you and so
book and I want to tour with you and so
book and I want to tour with you and so in the last since that time we’ve
in the last since that time we’ve
in the last since that time we’ve actually got the film finished the book
actually got the film finished the book
actually got the film finished the book finished we’ll be touring this year this
finished we’ll be touring this year this
finished we’ll be touring this year this is the name of the book that I did the
is the name of the book that I did the
is the name of the book that I did the project it’s going to be called no joke
project it’s going to be called no joke
project it’s going to be called no joke I’ve discovered there’s two kinds of
I’ve discovered there’s two kinds of
I’ve discovered there’s two kinds of explorers there’s those that come back
explorers there’s those that come back
explorers there’s those that come back and say you should have seen what I saw
and say you should have seen what I saw
and say you should have seen what I saw and those that come back with the
and those that come back with the
and those that come back with the map and when I met the Peoria 3 which is
map and when I met the Peoria 3 which is
map and when I met the Peoria 3 which is my name for them I realized that they
my name for them I realized that they
my name for them I realized that they had become adept at crossing the
had become adept at crossing the
had become adept at crossing the difference divide but they did what they
difference divide but they did what they
difference divide but they did what they lacked was a map and for the past 15
lacked was a map and for the past 15
lacked was a map and for the past 15 years I’ve been researching and studying
years I’ve been researching and studying
years I’ve been researching and studying people are crossing the difference
people are crossing the difference
people are crossing the difference divide and I’ve identified 3 behaviors
divide and I’ve identified 3 behaviors
divide and I’ve identified 3 behaviors of people are successful at it
of people are successful at it
of people are successful at it that I called the 3 practices I call
that I called the 3 practices I call
that I called the 3 practices I call them practices because I happen to
them practices because I happen to
them practices because I happen to believe that practicing is the only
believe that practicing is the only
believe that practicing is the only thing human beings are capable of doing
thing human beings are capable of doing
thing human beings are capable of doing I’ve synthesized their behaviors down to
I’ve synthesized their behaviors down to
I’ve synthesized their behaviors down to the three patches I’ll prep they
the three patches I’ll prep they
the three patches I’ll prep they practiced being unusually interested in
practiced being unusually interested in
practiced being unusually interested in others that means they know how to out
others that means they know how to out
others that means they know how to out listen people they’ve discovered human
listen people they’ve discovered human
listen people they’ve discovered human beings our attention junkies and if you
beings our attention junkies and if you
beings our attention junkies and if you simply don’t talk amazing things can
simply don’t talk amazing things can
simply don’t talk amazing things can happen they’ve figured out how to stay
happen they’ve figured out how to stay
happen they’ve figured out how to stay in the room with difference that means
in the room with difference that means
in the room with difference that means apparently the worst thing it could
apparently the worst thing it could
apparently the worst thing it could happen right now is for you to discover
happen right now is for you to discover
happen right now is for you to discover I voted for Trump and you voted for
I voted for Trump and you voted for
I voted for Trump and you voted for Hillary now we have to break up what why
Hillary now we have to break up what why
Hillary now we have to break up what why do we have to leave why do we have to
do we have to leave why do we have to
do we have to leave why do we have to break up we where’s that memo coming
break up we where’s that memo coming
break up we where’s that memo coming from why don’t we stay in the room
from why don’t we stay in the room
from why don’t we stay in the room longer get in the room stay in the room
longer get in the room stay in the room
longer get in the room stay in the room and the third thing is they learned to
and the third thing is they learned to
and the third thing is they learned to stop comparing their best with your
stop comparing their best with your
stop comparing their best with your worst that means instead of playing
worst that means instead of playing
worst that means instead of playing gotcha they play they give ground we
gotcha they play they give ground we
gotcha they play they give ground we decided for these practices to the test
decided for these practices to the test
decided for these practices to the test and recently ran a group three practice
and recently ran a group three practice
and recently ran a group three practice group and in that group we asked people
group and in that group we asked people
group and in that group we asked people to ideological opponents to come
to ideological opponents to come
to ideological opponents to come together who differ about politics said
together who differ about politics said
together who differ about politics said you voted for the president I didn’t
you voted for the president I didn’t
you voted for the president I didn’t tell us why you voted in that group one
tell us why you voted in that group one
tell us why you voted in that group one of the women said she voted for the
of the women said she voted for the
of the women said she voted for the president
president
president etc and I said tell me why tell me how
etc and I said tell me why tell me how
etc and I said tell me why tell me how you could explain to me how you
you could explain to me how you
you could explain to me how you explained to your sons his crude remarks
explained to your sons his crude remarks
explained to your sons his crude remarks about women she looked at the room
about women she looked at the room
about women she looked at the room non-plus and said all men are like that
non-plus and said all men are like that
non-plus and said all men are like that her husband is sitting right next to her
her husband is sitting right next to her
her husband is sitting right next to her at the end of the group it concludes
at the end of the group it concludes
at the end of the group it concludes with saying thank you say thank you to
with saying thank you say thank you to
with saying thank you say thank you to someone who helped you she turned to the
someone who helped you she turned to the
someone who helped you she turned to the group and said I want to thank you
group and said I want to thank you
group and said I want to thank you because I’ve never been in a group
because I’ve never been in a group
because I’ve never been in a group before where I felt heard
before where I felt heard
before where I felt heard the agreement is overrated
the agreement is overrated
the agreement is overrated it simply lacks the elasticity to
it simply lacks the elasticity to
it simply lacks the elasticity to stretch and span the difference divide
stretch and span the difference divide
stretch and span the difference divide dialogue discussion and our are helpful
dialogue discussion and our are helpful
dialogue discussion and our are helpful but they cannot bear under the crushing
but they cannot bear under the crushing
but they cannot bear under the crushing weight of difference that’s coming down
weight of difference that’s coming down
weight of difference that’s coming down on us they simply cannot do it alone
on us they simply cannot do it alone
on us they simply cannot do it alone none of these can bear under that weight
none of these can bear under that weight
none of these can bear under that weight we need to find a way to help people
we need to find a way to help people
we need to find a way to help people across the difference divide as I said
across the difference divide as I said
across the difference divide as I said I’m interested in maps the three
I’m interested in maps the three
I’m interested in maps the three practices are a map you can use to cross
practices are a map you can use to cross
practices are a map you can use to cross a difference of I they’re portable
a difference of I they’re portable
a difference of I they’re portable they’re adaptable and they will help you
they’re adaptable and they will help you
they’re adaptable and they will help you get from one end of the divide to the
get from one end of the divide to the
get from one end of the divide to the other this is how the Civil War I
other this is how the Civil War I
other this is how the Civil War I mentioned ended robert e lee the losing
mentioned ended robert e lee the losing
mentioned ended robert e lee the losing general said to the winning president i
general said to the winning president i
general said to the winning president i was i was i surrendered as much to
was i was i surrendered as much to
was i was i surrendered as much to lincoln’s kindness as grants guns thank
lincoln’s kindness as grants guns thank
lincoln’s kindness as grants guns thank you
”
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