let’s consider quality of life towards the end of life because I’m an artist
the end of life because I’m an artist
the end of life because I’m an artist I’d like to focus on the creative
I’d like to focus on the creative
I’d like to focus on the creative potential that arises as people approach
potential that arises as people approach
potential that arises as people approach their final days we don’t think of
their final days we don’t think of
their final days we don’t think of end-of-life usually as a time for
end-of-life usually as a time for
end-of-life usually as a time for artistic productivity but we should this
artistic productivity but we should this
artistic productivity but we should this is an important time for us to create
is an important time for us to create
is an important time for us to create and to share ourselves facing death that
and to share ourselves facing death that
and to share ourselves facing death that gives an unprecedented perspective a
gives an unprecedented perspective a
gives an unprecedented perspective a perspective that no one can inhabit
perspective that no one can inhabit
perspective that no one can inhabit fully until they approach that door
in our culture life ends in an
in our culture life ends in an institution 90% of Americans say they
institution 90% of Americans say they
institution 90% of Americans say they would prefer to die at home but 75% of
would prefer to die at home but 75% of
would prefer to die at home but 75% of them died in a nursing home or Hospital
them died in a nursing home or Hospital
them died in a nursing home or Hospital these institutions are good at
these institutions are good at
these institutions are good at prolonging and preserving life but they
prolonging and preserving life but they
prolonging and preserving life but they are not designed to nurture the
are not designed to nurture the
are not designed to nurture the creativity of those who live within I’d
creativity of those who live within I’d
creativity of those who live within I’d like to offer a completely different
like to offer a completely different
like to offer a completely different possibility
possibility
possibility what if creativity was the focus of the
what if creativity was the focus of the
what if creativity was the focus of the final months of life not just mere
final months of life not just mere
final months of life not just mere survival but actively sharing the
survival but actively sharing the
survival but actively sharing the accumulated experience of a lifetime
accumulated experience of a lifetime
accumulated experience of a lifetime what would it be to see each person
what would it be to see each person
what would it be to see each person approaching death as a creative being
approaching death as a creative being
approaching death as a creative being which they definitely are what would
which they definitely are what would
which they definitely are what would really like to treat them as an artist
really like to treat them as an artist
really like to treat them as an artist let me show you one way this can be done
let me show you one way this can be done
let me show you one way this can be done I live part of the year in Santa Fe New
I live part of the year in Santa Fe New
I live part of the year in Santa Fe New Mexico where I work as a pianist and
Mexico where I work as a pianist and
Mexico where I work as a pianist and composer for the past two years I’ve had
composer for the past two years I’ve had
composer for the past two years I’ve had the privilege of working with a group
the privilege of working with a group
the privilege of working with a group called life songs an intergenerational
called life songs an intergenerational
called life songs an intergenerational art project that promotes inclusion and
art project that promotes inclusion and
art project that promotes inclusion and dignity for elders life songs is a
dignity for elders life songs is a
dignity for elders life songs is a program of the Academy for the love of
program of the Academy for the love of
program of the Academy for the love of learning an organization envisioned by
learning an organization envisioned by
learning an organization envisioned by the American composers Leonard Bernstein
the American composers Leonard Bernstein
the American composers Leonard Bernstein and Aaron Stern life songs hires
and Aaron Stern life songs hires
and Aaron Stern life songs hires professional artists to create original
professional artists to create original
professional artists to create original work with hospice patients and nursing
work with hospice patients and nursing
work with hospice patients and nursing home residents through artistic
home residents through artistic
home residents through artistic collaboration public concerts and other
collaboration public concerts and other
collaboration public concerts and other community events we reconnect elders
community events we reconnect elders
community events we reconnect elders with their creative capacities this is
with their creative capacities this is
with their creative capacities this is Tony Molina
Tony Molina
Tony Molina one of my collaborators in the life
one of my collaborators in the life
one of my collaborators in the life songs project he loves to laugh tell
songs project he loves to laugh tell
songs project he loves to laugh tell stories sit in the sunshine and eat new
stories sit in the sunshine and eat new
stories sit in the sunshine and eat new Mexican food
Mexican food
Mexican food he’s also blind and unable to stand or
he’s also blind and unable to stand or
he’s also blind and unable to stand or walk he has two children and five
walk he has two children and five
walk he has two children and five grandchildren and lives with his wife
grandchildren and lives with his wife
grandchildren and lives with his wife Mary Lou Tony was a skilled craftsperson
Mary Lou Tony was a skilled craftsperson
Mary Lou Tony was a skilled craftsperson a silversmith and ceramics artists but
a silversmith and ceramics artists but
a silversmith and ceramics artists but he had no previous experience of working
he had no previous experience of working
he had no previous experience of working creatively with music or language so how
creatively with music or language so how
creatively with music or language so how did we get to know each other
did we get to know each other
did we get to know each other in December 2015 I got an email from
in December 2015 I got an email from
in December 2015 I got an email from life songs director with Tony and Mary
life songs director with Tony and Mary
life songs director with Tony and Mary Lou’s phone number their hospice nurse
Lou’s phone number their hospice nurse
Lou’s phone number their hospice nurse had identified Tony as someone who’d be
had identified Tony as someone who’d be
had identified Tony as someone who’d be open to receiving visitors someone who
open to receiving visitors someone who
open to receiving visitors someone who might be willing and eager to share his
might be willing and eager to share his
might be willing and eager to share his story my first meeting with Tony was
story my first meeting with Tony was
story my first meeting with Tony was challenging he was in and out of
challenging he was in and out of
challenging he was in and out of consciousness
he had trouble understanding what I was
he had trouble understanding what I was saying and I had trouble hearing what he
saying and I had trouble hearing what he
saying and I had trouble hearing what he was saying he was confused about who I
was saying he was confused about who I
was saying he was confused about who I was and why I was there but there was
was and why I was there but there was
was and why I was there but there was also a lot of potential when I’m working
also a lot of potential when I’m working
also a lot of potential when I’m working with an elder I listen for the stories
with an elder I listen for the stories
with an elder I listen for the stories that they are most invested in the ones
that they are most invested in the ones
that they are most invested in the ones that draw an emotion I also listen for
that draw an emotion I also listen for
that draw an emotion I also listen for stories with a bit of the unexpected
stories with a bit of the unexpected
stories with a bit of the unexpected stories that offer a fresh take on how
stories that offer a fresh take on how
stories that offer a fresh take on how the world works
the world works
the world works I asked Tony a few questions about his
I asked Tony a few questions about his
I asked Tony a few questions about his military service and he poured in two
military service and he poured in two
military service and he poured in two descriptions of his time in Vietnam I
descriptions of his time in Vietnam I
descriptions of his time in Vietnam I remember him telling me that he slept
remember him telling me that he slept
remember him telling me that he slept poorly for an entire year because the
poorly for an entire year because the
poorly for an entire year because the night ambush was always a possibility
night ambush was always a possibility
night ambush was always a possibility when he finally arrived home he slept
when he finally arrived home he slept
when he finally arrived home he slept for almost 24 hours straight this is us
for almost 24 hours straight this is us
for almost 24 hours straight this is us working together Tony and I met weekly
working together Tony and I met weekly
working together Tony and I met weekly over the course of four months sometimes
over the course of four months sometimes
over the course of four months sometimes twice a week in the first few sessions
twice a week in the first few sessions
twice a week in the first few sessions we got to know each other better in our
we got to know each other better in our
we got to know each other better in our second session
second session
second session Tony became more articulate and started
Tony became more articulate and started
Tony became more articulate and started sharing much more he remembered me and
sharing much more he remembered me and
sharing much more he remembered me and stopped asking why I was there Tony
stopped asking why I was there Tony
stopped asking why I was there Tony always thanked me for my visits gracias
always thanked me for my visits gracias
always thanked me for my visits gracias put easy tighter me IT Tony IT I asked
put easy tighter me IT Tony IT I asked
put easy tighter me IT Tony IT I asked Tony about the music that he loved and
Tony about the music that he loved and
Tony about the music that he loved and we started listening to some of his
we started listening to some of his
we started listening to some of his favorites together it was very clear
favorites together it was very clear
favorites together it was very clear that Tony was deeply moved by music when
that Tony was deeply moved by music when
that Tony was deeply moved by music when I play a song for him on headphones with
I play a song for him on headphones with
I play a song for him on headphones with the volume turned up loud enough that I
the volume turned up loud enough that I
the volume turned up loud enough that I could hear the sound bleeding through he
could hear the sound bleeding through he
could hear the sound bleeding through he would start to cry every time
after a few more sessions we became even
after a few more sessions we became even more comfortable Tony’s wife Mary Lou
more comfortable Tony’s wife Mary Lou
more comfortable Tony’s wife Mary Lou started to invite me to have lunch with
started to invite me to have lunch with
started to invite me to have lunch with them after each session the food was
them after each session the food was
them after each session the food was spicy and unbelievably delicious nothing
spicy and unbelievably delicious nothing
spicy and unbelievably delicious nothing compares to homemade stack of enchiladas
compares to homemade stack of enchiladas
compares to homemade stack of enchiladas or posole made in the southern New
or posole made in the southern New
or posole made in the southern New Mexican style if it was a weekday their
Mexican style if it was a weekday their
Mexican style if it was a weekday their son Marcos would often combine his lunch
son Marcos would often combine his lunch
son Marcos would often combine his lunch break if it was a weekend I would sit
break if it was a weekend I would sit
break if it was a weekend I would sit down with Tony and Mary Lou’s
down with Tony and Mary Lou’s
down with Tony and Mary Lou’s grandchildren
grandchildren
grandchildren Tony stories would continue over lunch
Tony stories would continue over lunch
Tony stories would continue over lunch with family members chiming in about
with family members chiming in about
with family members chiming in about their own experiences eventually I
their own experiences eventually I
their own experiences eventually I suggested to Tony that we write a song
suggested to Tony that we write a song
suggested to Tony that we write a song together I had this in mind all along
together I had this in mind all along
together I had this in mind all along fortunately Tony agreed he had an Apple
fortunately Tony agreed he had an Apple
fortunately Tony agreed he had an Apple way of saying sure to most of the things
way of saying sure to most of the things
way of saying sure to most of the things I suggested that said writing a song was
I suggested that said writing a song was
I suggested that said writing a song was something Tony had never tried before I
something Tony had never tried before I
something Tony had never tried before I admired the courage he showed and
admired the courage he showed and
admired the courage he showed and accepting my request I started bringing
accepting my request I started bringing
accepting my request I started bringing my keyboard into his living room playing
my keyboard into his living room playing
my keyboard into his living room playing little snippets of music to accompany
little snippets of music to accompany
little snippets of music to accompany the words that he had shared with me the
the words that he had shared with me the
the words that he had shared with me the first song we wrote together was a
first song we wrote together was a
first song we wrote together was a ballad about Tony’s boyhood dog Viejo
ballad about Tony’s boyhood dog Viejo
ballad about Tony’s boyhood dog Viejo Viejo was Tony’s teenage sidekick and
Viejo was Tony’s teenage sidekick and
Viejo was Tony’s teenage sidekick and also his teenage drinking buddy the two
also his teenage drinking buddy the two
also his teenage drinking buddy the two of them would share beer together and
of them would share beer together and
of them would share beer together and then find themselves in all sorts of
then find themselves in all sorts of
then find themselves in all sorts of trouble with the law and worse with
trouble with the law and worse with
trouble with the law and worse with Tony’s grandmother later on we started
Tony’s grandmother later on we started
Tony’s grandmother later on we started writing a song about the day he returned
writing a song about the day he returned
writing a song about the day he returned from Vietnam at the age of 23 Tony was
from Vietnam at the age of 23 Tony was
from Vietnam at the age of 23 Tony was drafted into the Army and the year he
drafted into the Army and the year he
drafted into the Army and the year he spent in combat was the most difficult
spent in combat was the most difficult
spent in combat was the most difficult of his life
Tony found that by telling his story he
Tony found that by telling his story he learned more about his military service
learned more about his military service
learned more about his military service bringing up traumatic memories was
bringing up traumatic memories was
bringing up traumatic memories was difficult but it also brought him to new
difficult but it also brought him to new
difficult but it also brought him to new depths of self-knowledge he said I
depths of self-knowledge he said I
depths of self-knowledge he said I learned how to talk about Vietnam before
learned how to talk about Vietnam before
learned how to talk about Vietnam before I would just shut up at end of life
I would just shut up at end of life
I would just shut up at end of life people sometimes feel the need to review
people sometimes feel the need to review
people sometimes feel the need to review certain experiences especially the ones
certain experiences especially the ones
certain experiences especially the ones they’ve not had a chance to process
they’ve not had a chance to process
they’ve not had a chance to process completely mary lou said that tony
completely mary lou said that tony
completely mary lou said that tony shared stories in our session that even
shared stories in our session that even
shared stories in our session that even she had never heard before giving our
she had never heard before giving our
she had never heard before giving our elders that space to process and express
elders that space to process and express
elders that space to process and express their experience is immensely valuable
working with tony also changed me i
working with tony also changed me i softened immensely in the presence of
softened immensely in the presence of
softened immensely in the presence of that sweet man his life had ripened him
that sweet man his life had ripened him
that sweet man his life had ripened him beautifully though his body was decaying
beautifully though his body was decaying
beautifully though his body was decaying his loving character remained fully
his loving character remained fully
his loving character remained fully intact I want to emphasize that Tony was
intact I want to emphasize that Tony was
intact I want to emphasize that Tony was a full creative partner in this process
a full creative partner in this process
a full creative partner in this process most of our song lyrics quote him
most of our song lyrics quote him
most of our song lyrics quote him directly or indirectly Tony also took an
directly or indirectly Tony also took an
directly or indirectly Tony also took an active role in create decision-making I
active role in create decision-making I
active role in create decision-making I would approach him with two or three
would approach him with two or three
would approach him with two or three directions that a song might take and
directions that a song might take and
directions that a song might take and then give him the executive power does
then give him the executive power does
then give him the executive power does the melody go up here or head back down
the melody go up here or head back down
the melody go up here or head back down do we want a dark chord or an optimistic
do we want a dark chord or an optimistic
do we want a dark chord or an optimistic one on the word again opening up
one on the word again opening up
one on the word again opening up creative control to Tony meant that I
creative control to Tony meant that I
creative control to Tony meant that I could authentically go far beyond my own
could authentically go far beyond my own
could authentically go far beyond my own experience together we create something
experience together we create something
experience together we create something that neither of us could have done alone
that neither of us could have done alone
that neither of us could have done alone the process and the results were deeply
the process and the results were deeply
the process and the results were deeply satisfying let me share Tony song with
satisfying let me share Tony song with
satisfying let me share Tony song with you now
today I came home from Vietnam I started
today I came home from Vietnam I started off on a plane the Greyhound bus brought
off on a plane the Greyhound bus brought
off on a plane the Greyhound bus brought me closer to home through cliffs sky a
me closer to home through cliffs sky a
me closer to home through cliffs sky a desert terrain saw ray at the station
desert terrain saw ray at the station
desert terrain saw ray at the station brought me home
brought me home
brought me home when I saw the tears on my mama’s face I
when I saw the tears on my mama’s face I
when I saw the tears on my mama’s face I just couldn’t hold it in walks with my
just couldn’t hold it in walks with my
just couldn’t hold it in walks with my mama’s hand and mind drinking up the
mama’s hand and mind drinking up the
mama’s hand and mind drinking up the Morning Sun took me down the Old Pueblo
Morning Sun took me down the Old Pueblo
Morning Sun took me down the Old Pueblo Road where this little ball used to run
Road where this little ball used to run
Road where this little ball used to run walked up to the it’s open for channa
walked up to the it’s open for channa
walked up to the it’s open for channa where my Papa steps
where my Papa steps
where my Papa steps donde esta la people
donde esta la people
donde esta la people man we were
man we were
man we were [Music]
they asked about the war said I don’t
they asked about the war said I don’t want to talk mama said a dog how for you
want to talk mama said a dog how for you
want to talk mama said a dog how for you every day
I couldn’t wait to see my little dog
I couldn’t wait to see my little dog again but huh he’s broken heart and
again but huh he’s broken heart and
again but huh he’s broken heart and passed away I went out to my 63 Chevy
passed away I went out to my 63 Chevy
passed away I went out to my 63 Chevy drove over to Mary Lou Papa offered me a
drove over to Mary Lou Papa offered me a
drove over to Mary Lou Papa offered me a cold beer I said thank you I’ll take two
cold beer I said thank you I’ll take two
cold beer I said thank you I’ll take two but before I drink a single drop I have
but before I drink a single drop I have
but before I drink a single drop I have to see a face
to see a face
to see a face after one long there
after one long there
after one long there [Music]
[Music]
[Music] my heart is out
my heart is out
my heart is out [Music]
[Music]
[Music] Mary the way to be to cat my lettuce to
Mary the way to be to cat my lettuce to
Mary the way to be to cat my lettuce to I dreamt often of her brown eyes
and when I hit the dark
and when I hit the dark from cannon fire
from cannon fire
from cannon fire [Music]
[Music]
[Music] she was Mary’s not sad I
she was my reason not to time
she was my reason not to time [Music]
people call me a hero some people called
people call me a hero some people called me names we didn’t know where we were
me names we didn’t know where we were
me names we didn’t know where we were fighting for but we fought hard just
fighting for but we fought hard just
fighting for but we fought hard just sing
sing
sing through muddy jungles we ran to survive
through muddy jungles we ran to survive
through muddy jungles we ran to survive I don’t know if I did good there but I
I don’t know if I did good there but I
I don’t know if I did good there but I made it home
made it home
made it home [Music]
I still dream of Marylou the kindness
I still dream of Marylou the kindness makes me grin when I use sound of eleven
makes me grin when I use sound of eleven
makes me grin when I use sound of eleven voice I know I’m home again
[Applause]
[Applause] life songs presented the day I came home
life songs presented the day I came home
life songs presented the day I came home for about a thousand people at the lens
for about a thousand people at the lens
for about a thousand people at the lens ik Theatre in Santa Fe along with ten
ik Theatre in Santa Fe along with ten
ik Theatre in Santa Fe along with ten other works compose with our elders we
other works compose with our elders we
other works compose with our elders we hired a band two professional musicians
hired a band two professional musicians
hired a band two professional musicians and produce these pieces at the highest
and produce these pieces at the highest
and produce these pieces at the highest level possible Tony was able to make it
level possible Tony was able to make it
level possible Tony was able to make it to that concert and 16 of his family
to that concert and 16 of his family
to that concert and 16 of his family members came to listen to witness what
members came to listen to witness what
members came to listen to witness what Tony had created
Tony had created
Tony had created they now have a singable legacy from
they now have a singable legacy from
they now have a singable legacy from tony and new memories to share with him
this kind of work is also inspiring for
this kind of work is also inspiring for the broader community everyone who
the broader community everyone who
the broader community everyone who attended that concert saw the
attended that concert saw the
attended that concert saw the possibility of a deeper relationship
possibility of a deeper relationship
possibility of a deeper relationship with the elders in their lives and we
with the elders in their lives and we
with the elders in their lives and we witnessed an expanded vision of the
witnessed an expanded vision of the
witnessed an expanded vision of the creativity in all of us art is not just
creativity in all of us art is not just
creativity in all of us art is not just for artists or for any particular kind
for artists or for any particular kind
for artists or for any particular kind of person it is the ancient mark of our
of person it is the ancient mark of our
of person it is the ancient mark of our shared humanity all of us have the
shared humanity all of us have the
shared humanity all of us have the capacity to create and collaborations
capacity to create and collaborations
capacity to create and collaborations between professional artists and
between professional artists and
between professional artists and laypeople Canon Earth a vast spring of
laypeople Canon Earth a vast spring of
laypeople Canon Earth a vast spring of creativity that usually goes untapped so
creativity that usually goes untapped so
creativity that usually goes untapped so let’s get together and get creative at
let’s get together and get creative at
let’s get together and get creative at any time in our lives but particularly
any time in our lives but particularly
any time in our lives but particularly at the end of life we need to bring
at the end of life we need to bring
at the end of life we need to bring death and dying out of the closet and
death and dying out of the closet and
death and dying out of the closet and our culture needs to reconnect with the
our culture needs to reconnect with the
our culture needs to reconnect with the wisdom of its elders we have layers of
wisdom of its elders we have layers of
wisdom of its elders we have layers of stigma surrounding aging and death that
stigma surrounding aging and death that
stigma surrounding aging and death that need to be lifted and overturned we also
need to be lifted and overturned we also
need to be lifted and overturned we also have wisdom acquired over lifetimes
have wisdom acquired over lifetimes
have wisdom acquired over lifetimes available to those who would simply
available to those who would simply
available to those who would simply listen and we have elders yearning to
listen and we have elders yearning to
listen and we have elders yearning to connect and create during these final
connect and create during these final
connect and create during these final pivotal moments what better way to do it
pivotal moments what better way to do it
pivotal moments what better way to do it than with a song thank you
than with a song thank you
than with a song thank you you
”
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