[Music] a few years ago a friend and I were
a few years ago a friend and I were
a few years ago a friend and I were taking a road trip from Boston to Texas
taking a road trip from Boston to Texas
taking a road trip from Boston to Texas Dallas Texas and from there we drove to
Dallas Texas and from there we drove to
Dallas Texas and from there we drove to big bend national park and we hiked we
big bend national park and we hiked we
big bend national park and we hiked we hiked purchases mountains we hiked the
hiked purchases mountains we hiked the
hiked purchases mountains we hiked the last mine trail five miles each
last mine trail five miles each
last mine trail five miles each direction and 110 degrees Fahrenheit or
direction and 110 degrees Fahrenheit or
direction and 110 degrees Fahrenheit or eight kilometers each way add 43.3
eight kilometers each way add 43.3
eight kilometers each way add 43.3 degrees Celsius the views from the top
degrees Celsius the views from the top
degrees Celsius the views from the top were astounding miles and miles and
were astounding miles and miles and
were astounding miles and miles and miles of untouched land I’ve never seen
miles of untouched land I’ve never seen
miles of untouched land I’ve never seen so much untouched land before and you
so much untouched land before and you
so much untouched land before and you could go hours without a single sighting
could go hours without a single sighting
could go hours without a single sighting of a person but we ran into two
of a person but we ran into two
of a person but we ran into two gentlemen and everyone was really hot
gentlemen and everyone was really hot
gentlemen and everyone was really hot and they couldn’t wait to speak to us
and they couldn’t wait to speak to us
and they couldn’t wait to speak to us they were older and asked us our names
they were older and asked us our names
they were older and asked us our names and where we were from so I said Elmo
and where we were from so I said Elmo
and where we were from so I said Elmo and it couldn’t wait to hear where I was
and it couldn’t wait to hear where I was
and it couldn’t wait to hear where I was from where’s that name from they said I
from where’s that name from they said I
from where’s that name from they said I said sorry Ava bosnia and one of the
said sorry Ava bosnia and one of the
said sorry Ava bosnia and one of the gentleman said while he looked at me at
gentleman said while he looked at me at
gentleman said while he looked at me at first with a puzzled look and a split
first with a puzzled look and a split
first with a puzzled look and a split second his face changed from puzzled to
second his face changed from puzzled to
second his face changed from puzzled to a strong sense of self confidence in he
a strong sense of self confidence in he
a strong sense of self confidence in he uttered saga avo I’ve always wanted to
uttered saga avo I’ve always wanted to
uttered saga avo I’ve always wanted to go to Japan and I said you should people
go to Japan and I said you should people
go to Japan and I said you should people there were very nice I’d be parted our
there were very nice I’d be parted our
there were very nice I’d be parted our ways every time I
ways every time I
ways every time I where I’m from I always say from sorry I
where I’m from I always say from sorry I
where I’m from I always say from sorry I Bosnian it’s become a sense of my
Bosnian it’s become a sense of my
Bosnian it’s become a sense of my identity and the longer I was away from
identity and the longer I was away from
identity and the longer I was away from Sarajevo the further away from it I felt
Sarajevo the further away from it I felt
Sarajevo the further away from it I felt I was born insatiable I hear that I’d
I was born insatiable I hear that I’d
I was born insatiable I hear that I’d rather not admit to you but I was eight
rather not admit to you but I was eight
rather not admit to you but I was eight years old my parents decided that for
years old my parents decided that for
years old my parents decided that for the sake of my younger brother and me we
the sake of my younger brother and me we
the sake of my younger brother and me we would leave sudden we would escape the
would leave sudden we would escape the
would leave sudden we would escape the war we would go to Germany where we
war we would go to Germany where we
war we would go to Germany where we would spend six years and the war ended
would spend six years and the war ended
would spend six years and the war ended what next my parents decided again for
what next my parents decided again for
what next my parents decided again for the sake of my brother and me that we
the sake of my brother and me that we
the sake of my brother and me that we would move the United States of America
would move the United States of America
would move the United States of America I was devastated I was crying I was
I was devastated I was crying I was
I was devastated I was crying I was throwing things I hated everyone around
throwing things I hated everyone around
throwing things I hated everyone around me I hated my friends who were admiring
me I hated my friends who were admiring
me I hated my friends who were admiring me for moving to the United States the
me for moving to the United States the
me for moving to the United States the land of endless possibilities even at
land of endless possibilities even at
land of endless possibilities even at that point at that young age I felt a
that point at that young age I felt a
that point at that young age I felt a sense of connection with a place where i
sense of connection with a place where i
sense of connection with a place where i was with the home having lived in Boston
was with the home having lived in Boston
was with the home having lived in Boston United States for 16 years I moved back
United States for 16 years I moved back
United States for 16 years I moved back to sun island all by myself having spent
to sun island all by myself having spent
to sun island all by myself having spent such a long time away from the place
such a long time away from the place
such a long time away from the place that would call my home I felt very far
that would call my home I felt very far
that would call my home I felt very far away from it people say that home is
away from it people say that home is
away from it people say that home is where the heart is biologically speaking
where the heart is biologically speaking
where the heart is biologically speaking technically speed
technically speed
technically speed kink homes everywhere you are because
kink homes everywhere you are because
kink homes everywhere you are because that’s where your heart is hopefully so
that’s where your heart is hopefully so
that’s where your heart is hopefully so are you at home everywhere different
are you at home everywhere different
are you at home everywhere different cultures define homes differently
cultures define homes differently
cultures define homes differently certain cultures believe that the home
certain cultures believe that the home
certain cultures believe that the home and self are interconnected they
and self are interconnected they
and self are interconnected they interact on another other cultures on
interact on another other cultures on
interact on another other cultures on the other hand believe that the self and
the other hand believe that the self and
the other hand believe that the self and the place are divorced for one another
the place are divorced for one another
the place are divorced for one another completely separate we move to a place
completely separate we move to a place
completely separate we move to a place because it offers us a better so to
because it offers us a better so to
because it offers us a better so to economic status we move to a place for a
economic status we move to a place for a
economic status we move to a place for a better school for more money for better
better school for more money for better
better school for more money for better house we want to buy a house here and
house we want to buy a house here and
house we want to buy a house here and not there different definitions of home
not there different definitions of home
not there different definitions of home my brother and I went to the best
my brother and I went to the best
my brother and I went to the best schools in germany and i had a luxury of
schools in germany and i had a luxury of
schools in germany and i had a luxury of a Harvard education in the United States
a Harvard education in the United States
a Harvard education in the United States and a career in one of the best
and a career in one of the best
and a career in one of the best biotechnology firms as a scientist yet
biotechnology firms as a scientist yet
biotechnology firms as a scientist yet still regardless of what ties us to a
still regardless of what ties us to a
still regardless of what ties us to a place whether in socioeconomic status or
place whether in socioeconomic status or
place whether in socioeconomic status or money or education or whatever other
money or education or whatever other
money or education or whatever other benefits you have there’s something else
benefits you have there’s something else
benefits you have there’s something else i connect to place there’s a reason why
i connect to place there’s a reason why
i connect to place there’s a reason why one of the first questions we asked
one of the first questions we asked
one of the first questions we asked someone is where are you from it’s not
someone is where are you from it’s not
someone is where are you from it’s not because we want to take a push and we
because we want to take a push and we
because we want to take a push and we want to locate them in a mount it’s that
want to locate them in a mount it’s that
want to locate them in a mount it’s that means something to us it’s because when
means something to us it’s because when
means something to us it’s because when we ask them where they’re from and we
we ask them where they’re from and we
we ask them where they’re from and we find out we inadvertently tie their
find out we inadvertently tie their
find out we inadvertently tie their heritage or their place of where they’re
heritage or their place of where they’re
heritage or their place of where they’re from to them for me the question of
from to them for me the question of
from to them for me the question of where I’m from is undoubtedly tied to
where I’m from is undoubtedly tied to
where I’m from is undoubtedly tied to Saturn
Saturn
Saturn bosnia but where’s my home is an
bosnia but where’s my home is an
bosnia but where’s my home is an entirely different answer so the duality
entirely different answer so the duality
entirely different answer so the duality home for me became very apparent when my
home for me became very apparent when my
home for me became very apparent when my parents of my brother and I would buy
parents of my brother and I would buy
parents of my brother and I would buy tickets every summer we would come back
tickets every summer we would come back
tickets every summer we would come back for a couple of weeks to survive until
for a couple of weeks to survive until
for a couple of weeks to survive until is it when my friends in Boston would
is it when my friends in Boston would
is it when my friends in Boston would ask me or are you going from somewhere
ask me or are you going from somewhere
ask me or are you going from somewhere say ongoing old satyr and then when
say ongoing old satyr and then when
say ongoing old satyr and then when there’s two weeks or three weeks are
there’s two weeks or three weeks are
there’s two weeks or three weeks are over my friends or family in Saudi would
over my friends or family in Saudi would
over my friends or family in Saudi would say oh not even my Coleman I would say
say oh not even my Coleman I would say
say oh not even my Coleman I would say yes I’m going back home boston and sada
yes I’m going back home boston and sada
yes I’m going back home boston and sada avo can be similar but are very very
avo can be similar but are very very
avo can be similar but are very very different culturally language wise and
different culturally language wise and
different culturally language wise and yet both I time with sense of home how
yet both I time with sense of home how
yet both I time with sense of home how was it the district places both are home
was it the district places both are home
was it the district places both are home to me there’s so far away from each
to me there’s so far away from each
to me there’s so far away from each other in every sense of the word and yet
other in every sense of the word and yet
other in every sense of the word and yet I find both of them at home and as I
I find both of them at home and as I
I find both of them at home and as I discovered that also a sense of missing
discovered that also a sense of missing
discovered that also a sense of missing and longing started to appear as I grew
and longing started to appear as I grew
and longing started to appear as I grew older when I was in Boston I would miss
older when I was in Boston I would miss
older when I was in Boston I would miss thought I’d home and when I was inside I
thought I’d home and when I was inside I
thought I’d home and when I was inside I would miss Boston so how is that
would miss Boston so how is that
would miss Boston so how is that possible so in 2013 October October of
possible so in 2013 October October of
possible so in 2013 October October of every year before that my parents would
every year before that my parents would
every year before that my parents would got tickets for the following summer of
got tickets for the following summer of
got tickets for the following summer of the next year and we bought tickets for
the next year and we bought tickets for
the next year and we bought tickets for the summer of two thousand fourteen and
the summer of two thousand fourteen and
the summer of two thousand fourteen and I would announce myself my arrival I
I would announce myself my arrival I
I would announce myself my arrival I would call my friends my family were
would call my friends my family were
would call my friends my family were coming coming to summer and one of my
coming coming to summer and one of my
coming coming to summer and one of my friends said all wouldn’t it be awesome
friends said all wouldn’t it be awesome
friends said all wouldn’t it be awesome if he came from New Year you know a
if he came from New Year you know a
if he came from New Year you know a couple months don’t worry just buy the
couple months don’t worry just buy the
couple months don’t worry just buy the ticket
ticket
ticket of everything for him I didn’t say no I
of everything for him I didn’t say no I
of everything for him I didn’t say no I couldn’t say no at the time it just
couldn’t say no at the time it just
couldn’t say no at the time it just wasn’t a no answer so couple of days
wasn’t a no answer so couple of days
wasn’t a no answer so couple of days later I didn’t answer her and I was
later I didn’t answer her and I was
later I didn’t answer her and I was taking the train home one evening after
taking the train home one evening after
taking the train home one evening after a really long day and I’m on kayak
a really long day and I’m on kayak
a really long day and I’m on kayak looking tickets looking at tickets for
looking tickets looking at tickets for
looking tickets looking at tickets for sorry vos as JJ a few days oh the new
sorry vos as JJ a few days oh the new
sorry vos as JJ a few days oh the new year and about it on my cell phone so
year and about it on my cell phone so
year and about it on my cell phone so much money was gone and I told my mom
much money was gone and I told my mom
much money was gone and I told my mom mom I got tickets for sat i won’t she
mom I got tickets for sat i won’t she
mom I got tickets for sat i won’t she said no we already bought those for the
said no we already bought those for the
said no we already bought those for the summer the mom about two for the new
summer the mom about two for the new
summer the mom about two for the new year and she said no but your dad and I
year and she said no but your dad and I
year and she said no but your dad and I already have planes minus here we can’t
already have planes minus here we can’t
already have planes minus here we can’t go like mom and going by myself by
go like mom and going by myself by
go like mom and going by myself by yourself yeah and so I did I went by
yourself yeah and so I did I went by
yourself yeah and so I did I went by myself and it was wonderful for the
myself and it was wonderful for the
myself and it was wonderful for the first time I was alone and I could
first time I was alone and I could
first time I was alone and I could experience the city no I don’t know how
experience the city no I don’t know how
experience the city no I don’t know how many of you in the audience had a chance
many of you in the audience had a chance
many of you in the audience had a chance to be a diaspora a person who was left
to be a diaspora a person who was left
to be a diaspora a person who was left to sitting move someplace else to live
to sitting move someplace else to live
to sitting move someplace else to live and then come back to the city to visit
and then come back to the city to visit
and then come back to the city to visit and yes for ins two weeks inside of a
and yes for ins two weeks inside of a
and yes for ins two weeks inside of a heart filled with endless coffees with
heart filled with endless coffees with
heart filled with endless coffees with friends with family you’ve known you had
friends with family you’ve known you had
friends with family you’ve known you had with family you didn’t know you had
with family you didn’t know you had
with family you didn’t know you had half though and you must have coffee and
half though and you must have coffee and
half though and you must have coffee and mon coffee’s not enough please come
mon coffee’s not enough please come
mon coffee’s not enough please come visit for more coffee and you can’t just
visit for more coffee and you can’t just
visit for more coffee and you can’t just leave after one cough you must come back
leave after one cough you must come back
leave after one cough you must come back for a full meal two weeks go by and
for a full meal two weeks go by and
for a full meal two weeks go by and you’re exhausted he was to save and have
you’re exhausted he was to save and have
you’re exhausted he was to save and have much time to really fully take inside
much time to really fully take inside
much time to really fully take inside animal and for the first time in that
animal and for the first time in that
animal and for the first time in that two weeks when I was by myself I
two weeks when I was by myself I
two weeks when I was by myself I wondered her own city and if you watch
wondered her own city and if you watch
wondered her own city and if you watch carrie bradshaw sex in the city she says
carrie bradshaw sex in the city she says
carrie bradshaw sex in the city she says she was on a date with new york at some
she was on a date with new york at some
she was on a date with new york at some point i was a two-week-long date with
point i was a two-week-long date with
point i was a two-week-long date with sarah and i fell in love i remembered
sarah and i fell in love i remembered
sarah and i fell in love i remembered the skype conversations with my parents
the skype conversations with my parents
the skype conversations with my parents and I’m saying to them oh and I
and I’m saying to them oh and I
and I’m saying to them oh and I prolonged my two weeks I made it three
prolonged my two weeks I made it three
prolonged my two weeks I made it three weeks and I’m told them I really want to
weeks and I’m told them I really want to
weeks and I’m told them I really want to live here and my mom looks at me what
live here and my mom looks at me what
live here and my mom looks at me what are we gonna do with all your stuff like
are we gonna do with all your stuff like
are we gonna do with all your stuff like mom and my dad the pragmatic one of the
mom and my dad the pragmatic one of the
mom and my dad the pragmatic one of the two cents while yet still be back you
two cents while yet still be back you
two cents while yet still be back you know you’re under the impression to your
know you’re under the impression to your
know you’re under the impression to your honor motions come back think about it
honor motions come back think about it
honor motions come back think about it so I’m back in March again but my mind
so I’m back in March again but my mind
so I’m back in March again but my mind was already sucked I was going back to
was already sucked I was going back to
was already sucked I was going back to where I was from so in March some 2013
where I was from so in March some 2013
where I was from so in March some 2013 and attends to give a guest lecture at
and attends to give a guest lecture at
and attends to give a guest lecture at international bert university if I love
international bert university if I love
international bert university if I love I saw my place inside of them I would
I saw my place inside of them I would
I saw my place inside of them I would get to know the city where I would say I
get to know the city where I would say I
get to know the city where I would say I am thrown so what does it mean what is
am thrown so what does it mean what is
am thrown so what does it mean what is this sense of home and the importance of
this sense of home and the importance of
this sense of home and the importance of sense of home what are the reasons for
sense of home what are the reasons for
sense of home what are the reasons for coming back I can’t share all my reasons
coming back I can’t share all my reasons
coming back I can’t share all my reasons for returning with you
for returning with you
for returning with you because I don’t want to but because I
because I don’t want to but because I
because I don’t want to but because I don’t know all the reasons I knew some
don’t know all the reasons I knew some
don’t know all the reasons I knew some of the reasons when I decided to move
of the reasons when I decided to move
of the reasons when I decided to move but I found out more and more reasons as
but I found out more and more reasons as
but I found out more and more reasons as the time went on as I got to know myself
the time went on as I got to know myself
the time went on as I got to know myself better as a member of the site of
better as a member of the site of
better as a member of the site of community I’m really excited to find out
community I’m really excited to find out
community I’m really excited to find out even more reasons why I had to come back
even more reasons why I had to come back
even more reasons why I had to come back to Center home we will get into the
to Center home we will get into the
to Center home we will get into the reasons in a little bit but it’s
reasons in a little bit but it’s
reasons in a little bit but it’s particularly interesting to experience a
particularly interesting to experience a
particularly interesting to experience a conversation between a cab driver and me
conversation between a cab driver and me
conversation between a cab driver and me when they find out that I came back to
when they find out that I came back to
when they find out that I came back to tie dye bomb from Boston Massachusetts
tie dye bomb from Boston Massachusetts
tie dye bomb from Boston Massachusetts USA and if you know how cab drivers
USA and if you know how cab drivers
USA and if you know how cab drivers inside of a drive we can imagine my fear
inside of a drive we can imagine my fear
inside of a drive we can imagine my fear but I told a cab driver I moved and he’s
but I told a cab driver I moved and he’s
but I told a cab driver I moved and he’s driving and he’s looking back at me is
driving and he’s looking back at me is
driving and he’s looking back at me is this is really happening so why did I
this is really happening so why did I
this is really happening so why did I come back first reasons when you live in
come back first reasons when you live in
come back first reasons when you live in a place long enough you’re human you
a place long enough you’re human you
a place long enough you’re human you make mistakes sometimes you forget to
make mistakes sometimes you forget to
make mistakes sometimes you forget to appreciate it but I lived in Boston I’m
appreciate it but I lived in Boston I’m
appreciate it but I lived in Boston I’m get upset that I couldn’t register my
get upset that I couldn’t register my
get upset that I couldn’t register my car online because the internet was down
car online because the internet was down
car online because the internet was down I’ll get really upset I’m going to set
I’ll get really upset I’m going to set
I’ll get really upset I’m going to set the traffic sometimes going home would
the traffic sometimes going home would
the traffic sometimes going home would take too long excruciating hours and
take too long excruciating hours and
take too long excruciating hours and then I came here and my registration
then I came here and my registration
then I came here and my registration expired twice silently and we’ve tried
expired twice silently and we’ve tried
expired twice silently and we’ve tried to convince a police officer that it
to convince a police officer that it
to convince a police officer that it didn’t expire but it did expire when I
didn’t expire but it did expire when I
didn’t expire but it did expire when I was Carlos for a week and then I
was Carlos for a week and then I
was Carlos for a week and then I remembered how easy it was to register
remembered how easy it was to register
remembered how easy it was to register your car in Boston and I know that if I
your car in Boston and I know that if I
your car in Boston and I know that if I ever have to register my car busted
ever have to register my car busted
ever have to register my car busted again
again
again never be upset if I lose internet and
never be upset if I lose internet and
never be upset if I lose internet and being stuck in traffic inside open there
being stuck in traffic inside open there
being stuck in traffic inside open there are maybe ten cars in front of a human
are maybe ten cars in front of a human
are maybe ten cars in front of a human that’s considered traffic and my friends
that’s considered traffic and my friends
that’s considered traffic and my friends are complaining my husband’s complaining
are complaining my husband’s complaining
are complaining my husband’s complaining and I say when you have a hundred cars
and I say when you have a hundred cars
and I say when you have a hundred cars in front of you and delight is teeny
in front of you and delight is teeny
in front of you and delight is teeny teeny tiny that’s what you call traffic
teeny tiny that’s what you call traffic
teeny tiny that’s what you call traffic one side of a traffic but the two cities
one side of a traffic but the two cities
one side of a traffic but the two cities it’s as if I had to be in every single
it’s as if I had to be in every single
it’s as if I had to be in every single one of them to really develop the sons
one of them to really develop the sons
one of them to really develop the sons of gratefulness I have to bring up my
of gratefulness I have to bring up my
of gratefulness I have to bring up my mother again or every time she comes to
mother again or every time she comes to
mother again or every time she comes to side I but she’s devastatingly admitting
side I but she’s devastatingly admitting
side I but she’s devastatingly admitting that oh it’s such occurs to to be from
that oh it’s such occurs to to be from
that oh it’s such occurs to to be from survival and have to have escaped and
survival and have to have escaped and
survival and have to have escaped and come back and then in when you’re sorry
come back and then in when you’re sorry
come back and then in when you’re sorry you miss Boston when you’re in Boston
you miss Boston when you’re in Boston
you miss Boston when you’re in Boston you missed that Island and you just
you missed that Island and you just
you missed that Island and you just you’re always missing missing missing
you’re always missing missing missing
you’re always missing missing missing and I’ve done of me you’re not always
and I’ve done of me you’re not always
and I’ve done of me you’re not always missing your nostalgic your longing for
missing your nostalgic your longing for
missing your nostalgic your longing for the beautiful feelings you have in every
the beautiful feelings you have in every
the beautiful feelings you have in every city and not a lot of people get to say
city and not a lot of people get to say
city and not a lot of people get to say that it means that you have support
that it means that you have support
that it means that you have support networks in each city you have beautiful
networks in each city you have beautiful
networks in each city you have beautiful memories have beautiful self in each one
memories have beautiful self in each one
memories have beautiful self in each one of those cities the two minutes in two
of those cities the two minutes in two
of those cities the two minutes in two places of the globe not a lot of people
places of the globe not a lot of people
places of the globe not a lot of people get to say that so there’s also a sense
get to say that so there’s also a sense
get to say that so there’s also a sense of luck in that nonetheless sudden and
of luck in that nonetheless sudden and
of luck in that nonetheless sudden and Boston are similar as well people are
Boston are similar as well people are
Boston are similar as well people are amazing they like discipline hard work
amazing they like discipline hard work
amazing they like discipline hard work creativity appreciation of what’s
creativity appreciation of what’s
creativity appreciation of what’s beautiful are all international
beautiful are all international
beautiful are all international languages don’t know if you’ve heard
languages don’t know if you’ve heard
languages don’t know if you’ve heard Johnny Carson’s New York minute
Johnny Carson’s New York minute
Johnny Carson’s New York minute definition needs an instant it’s that
definition needs an instant it’s that
definition needs an instant it’s that instant between the light turning
instant between the light turning
instant between the light turning and the person behind me honking that’s
and the person behind me honking that’s
and the person behind me honking that’s also similarity as well as scientific
also similarity as well as scientific
also similarity as well as scientific publication records fear scientist and
publication records fear scientist and
publication records fear scientist and the same anywhere you are so nobody can
the same anywhere you are so nobody can
the same anywhere you are so nobody can escape that sense of being connected to
escape that sense of being connected to
escape that sense of being connected to the place where you are you can’t escape
the place where you are you can’t escape
the place where you are you can’t escape your environment your product of it
your environment your product of it
your environment your product of it you’re an interaction of its I can’t be
you’re an interaction of its I can’t be
you’re an interaction of its I can’t be in two places at the same time I can
in two places at the same time I can
in two places at the same time I can only be in one place at one time but I
only be in one place at one time but I
only be in one place at one time but I need to call both places home and home
need to call both places home and home
need to call both places home and home is undoubtedly the place where the
is undoubtedly the place where the
is undoubtedly the place where the senses of self the line between the
senses of self the line between the
senses of self the line between the signs of self and a place become blurry
signs of self and a place become blurry
signs of self and a place become blurry that is what i would call home so to go
that is what i would call home so to go
that is what i would call home so to go back I realized that if I wanted to keep
back I realized that if I wanted to keep
back I realized that if I wanted to keep calling side I’ve into place burns from
calling side I’ve into place burns from
calling side I’ve into place burns from I would have to go back I have to go
I would have to go back I have to go
I would have to go back I have to go back and really take it in so i can keep
back and really take it in so i can keep
back and really take it in so i can keep continuing so I’m continue saying that
continuing so I’m continue saying that
continuing so I’m continue saying that are really from sorry I’d go back to the
are really from sorry I’d go back to the
are really from sorry I’d go back to the future until another future calls me
future until another future calls me
future until another future calls me thank you very much
thank you very much
thank you very much [Applause]
”
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