the Soraa wind blows omens of disaster black fog overcast on the horizon
black fog overcast on the horizon
black fog overcast on the horizon premonitions make my bones shiver
premonitions make my bones shiver
premonitions make my bones shiver slivers of light drown in this dark
slivers of light drown in this dark
slivers of light drown in this dark atmosphere where every day is darker
atmosphere where every day is darker
atmosphere where every day is darker than the last and nobody’s ever present
than the last and nobody’s ever present
than the last and nobody’s ever present in the silver glass I asked for better
in the silver glass I asked for better
in the silver glass I asked for better days but my wish is hollow no answer
days but my wish is hollow no answer
days but my wish is hollow no answer ever follows bitter regret and sorrow is
ever follows bitter regret and sorrow is
ever follows bitter regret and sorrow is too much to swallow tomorrow never comes
too much to swallow tomorrow never comes
too much to swallow tomorrow never comes here in this dark atmosphere with only
here in this dark atmosphere with only
here in this dark atmosphere with only sadness and fear it’s clear that I can’t
sadness and fear it’s clear that I can’t
sadness and fear it’s clear that I can’t see my path clash with the devil I must
see my path clash with the devil I must
see my path clash with the devil I must show their feelings the after math days
show their feelings the after math days
show their feelings the after math days get colder but nobody ever gets older my
get colder but nobody ever gets older my
get colder but nobody ever gets older my spirit collapsed from a burden too heavy
spirit collapsed from a burden too heavy
spirit collapsed from a burden too heavy to shoulder the more I live here’s up
to shoulder the more I live here’s up
to shoulder the more I live here’s up more I die slowly at first but faster
more I die slowly at first but faster
more I die slowly at first but faster now desperate my soul clings to the
now desperate my soul clings to the
now desperate my soul clings to the light as I wallow in the freight of
light as I wallow in the freight of
light as I wallow in the freight of eternal night despite my fight I cannot
eternal night despite my fight I cannot
eternal night despite my fight I cannot resist the cold that bites my bones
resist the cold that bites my bones
resist the cold that bites my bones whenever the sorrel wind blows what’s up
whenever the sorrel wind blows what’s up
whenever the sorrel wind blows what’s up everybody how you doing
everybody how you doing
everybody how you doing [Applause]
so my name is Asante Houghton and I’m a
so my name is Asante Houghton and I’m a person who has lived with depression and
person who has lived with depression and
person who has lived with depression and anxiety for the large majority of my
anxiety for the large majority of my
anxiety for the large majority of my life also for the large majority of my
life also for the large majority of my
life also for the large majority of my life I’ve been obsessed with stories and
life I’ve been obsessed with stories and
life I’ve been obsessed with stories and words and the words used to construct
words and the words used to construct
words and the words used to construct these stories so what I’m gonna do today
these stories so what I’m gonna do today
these stories so what I’m gonna do today is I’m gonna use my words to construct
is I’m gonna use my words to construct
is I’m gonna use my words to construct my story and let you know about I guess
my story and let you know about I guess
my story and let you know about I guess what I have gone through in my life and
what I have gone through in my life and
what I have gone through in my life and to tell you about how I was able to get
to tell you about how I was able to get
to tell you about how I was able to get to the place I’m at today and also maybe
to the place I’m at today and also maybe
to the place I’m at today and also maybe to think about how we can help other
to think about how we can help other
to think about how we can help other young people who may be struggling get
young people who may be struggling get
young people who may be struggling get the help that they need so this is it my
the help that they need so this is it my
the help that they need so this is it my story chapter one in Genesis so when I
story chapter one in Genesis so when I
story chapter one in Genesis so when I was a kid if you asked me what I wanted
was a kid if you asked me what I wanted
was a kid if you asked me what I wanted to be when I grow up I will tell you I
to be when I grow up I will tell you I
to be when I grow up I will tell you I wanted to be an adventurer I guess in my
wanted to be an adventurer I guess in my
wanted to be an adventurer I guess in my mind I felt like Indiana Jones and I was
mind I felt like Indiana Jones and I was
mind I felt like Indiana Jones and I was always trying to escape from something
always trying to escape from something
always trying to escape from something you see growing up for me it wasn’t easy
you see growing up for me it wasn’t easy
you see growing up for me it wasn’t easy at five years old I found myself living
at five years old I found myself living
at five years old I found myself living in a shelter with my mom and my two
in a shelter with my mom and my two
in a shelter with my mom and my two older brothers in from the shelter we
older brothers in from the shelter we
older brothers in from the shelter we ended up in public housing and we never
ended up in public housing and we never
ended up in public housing and we never it never had the opportunity to
it never had the opportunity to
it never had the opportunity to celebrate things like birthdays and
celebrate things like birthdays and
celebrate things like birthdays and Christmases and I remember peeling the
Christmases and I remember peeling the
Christmases and I remember peeling the mold off of my toast and eating my
mold off of my toast and eating my
mold off of my toast and eating my frosted flakes with roaches swimming in
frosted flakes with roaches swimming in
frosted flakes with roaches swimming in the milk it was the only food that we
the milk it was the only food that we
the milk it was the only food that we had my mom she was working in I didn’t
had my mom she was working in I didn’t
had my mom she was working in I didn’t get to see her much and my father wasn’t
get to see her much and my father wasn’t
get to see her much and my father wasn’t around and my brothers are much older so
around and my brothers are much older so
around and my brothers are much older so they weren’t around so I spent a lot of
they weren’t around so I spent a lot of
they weren’t around so I spent a lot of time alone but despite that at school
time alone but despite that at school
time alone but despite that at school well I was a star on the field and I was
well I was a star on the field and I was
well I was a star on the field and I was a star in the classroom as for birthday
a star in the classroom as for birthday
a star in the classroom as for birthday parties I couldn’t afford my own but I
parties I couldn’t afford my own but I
parties I couldn’t afford my own but I got invited to everybody else’s so in
got invited to everybody else’s so in
got invited to everybody else’s so in elementary school I was kind of killing
elementary school I was kind of killing
elementary school I was kind of killing it
well then one day my mom she came home
well then one day my mom she came home doing something I never seen her do
doing something I never seen her do
doing something I never seen her do before she was crying she said that my
before she was crying she said that my
before she was crying she said that my father had been stalking her and
father had been stalking her and
father had been stalking her and threatened to kill her so that meant
threatened to kill her so that meant
threatened to kill her so that meant that we had to move across the city to
that we had to move across the city to
that we had to move across the city to an even more notorious housing project
an even more notorious housing project
an even more notorious housing project and that meant all of a sudden I just
and that meant all of a sudden I just
and that meant all of a sudden I just lost my friends I lost my community I
lost my friends I lost my community I
lost my friends I lost my community I lost my home suddenly everything was
lost my home suddenly everything was
lost my home suddenly everything was different but then grade 9 started and I
different but then grade 9 started and I
different but then grade 9 started and I was able to make some friends and you
was able to make some friends and you
was able to make some friends and you know that was good and then the summer
know that was good and then the summer
know that was good and then the summer after great night I met my first
after great night I met my first
after great night I met my first girlfriend and that was good too but
girlfriend and that was good too but
girlfriend and that was good too but then you know a really tough day that
then you know a really tough day that
then you know a really tough day that would change my life happened I remember
would change my life happened I remember
would change my life happened I remember it very clearly it was a Sunday morning
it very clearly it was a Sunday morning
it very clearly it was a Sunday morning and my brothers and I we were watching
and my brothers and I we were watching
and my brothers and I we were watching the Eurocup soccer final between france
the Eurocup soccer final between france
the Eurocup soccer final between france and italy and then we got a knock on the
and italy and then we got a knock on the
and italy and then we got a knock on the door so then i went to the door and i
door so then i went to the door and i
door so then i went to the door and i answered it and there were two men in
answered it and there were two men in
answered it and there were two men in this uniform saying they’re from the
this uniform saying they’re from the
this uniform saying they’re from the suicide crisis hotline and they were
suicide crisis hotline and they were
suicide crisis hotline and they were looking for a lady named jasmine and i
looking for a lady named jasmine and i
looking for a lady named jasmine and i thought this was really weird because
thought this was really weird because
thought this was really weird because jasmine is my mom’s name but not
jasmine is my mom’s name but not
jasmine is my mom’s name but not thinking anything of it let them in the
thinking anything of it let them in the
thinking anything of it let them in the house went upstairs open my mom’s
house went upstairs open my mom’s
house went upstairs open my mom’s bedroom door now what do we find but our
bedroom door now what do we find but our
bedroom door now what do we find but our mom on the floor she’s crying
mom on the floor she’s crying
mom on the floor she’s crying pill scattered around her say she
pill scattered around her say she
pill scattered around her say she doesn’t want to go on anymore and it
doesn’t want to go on anymore and it
doesn’t want to go on anymore and it felt like a wrecking ball hit me in the
felt like a wrecking ball hit me in the
felt like a wrecking ball hit me in the wall upon which all of my beliefs about
wall upon which all of my beliefs about
wall upon which all of my beliefs about the world that wall was shattered and I
the world that wall was shattered and I
the world that wall was shattered and I kept thinking wake up wake up but there
kept thinking wake up wake up but there
kept thinking wake up wake up but there was nothing to wake up from this was
was nothing to wake up from this was
was nothing to wake up from this was real this was really happening my mother
real this was really happening my mother
real this was really happening my mother wanted to end her life it was on that
wanted to end her life it was on that
wanted to end her life it was on that day that everything changed
day that everything changed
day that everything changed chapter 2
chapter 2
chapter 2 into the darkness so they took my mom to
into the darkness so they took my mom to
into the darkness so they took my mom to the hospital they gave her a
the hospital they gave her a
the hospital they gave her a prescription for antidepressants they
prescription for antidepressants they
prescription for antidepressants they sent her home we thought everything
sent her home we thought everything
sent her home we thought everything would be okay
would be okay
would be okay well we were wrong over the next year my
well we were wrong over the next year my
well we were wrong over the next year my mom would spend a lot of time in and out
mom would spend a lot of time in and out
mom would spend a lot of time in and out of the hospital slowly deteriorating and
of the hospital slowly deteriorating and
of the hospital slowly deteriorating and then the conspiracy theory started she
then the conspiracy theory started she
then the conspiracy theory started she imagined that the government was after
imagined that the government was after
imagined that the government was after us and they had cars outside the house
us and they had cars outside the house
us and they had cars outside the house watching us so she put sheets up over
watching us so she put sheets up over
watching us so she put sheets up over all the windows so no one can see inside
all the windows so no one can see inside
all the windows so no one can see inside she started to hallucinate and hear
she started to hallucinate and hear
she started to hallucinate and hear voices and
voices and
voices and she stopped eating and sleeping almost
she stopped eating and sleeping almost
she stopped eating and sleeping almost completely and by the time you know
completely and by the time you know
completely and by the time you know summer after grade 10 my brothers and I
summer after grade 10 my brothers and I
summer after grade 10 my brothers and I we saw that she was deteriorating really
we saw that she was deteriorating really
we saw that she was deteriorating really fast so we had to do something to keep
fast so we had to do something to keep
fast so we had to do something to keep her mother alive so we went to KFC and
her mother alive so we went to KFC and
her mother alive so we went to KFC and got a big bucket of chicken
and we sat around the table coming up
and we sat around the table coming up with a plan and then we went home and
with a plan and then we went home and
with a plan and then we went home and the next day we executed that plan and
the next day we executed that plan and
the next day we executed that plan and we called 911 said we lied to them and
we called 911 said we lied to them and
we called 911 said we lied to them and said our mom is a danger to herself
said our mom is a danger to herself
said our mom is a danger to herself they came immediately saw how bad she
they came immediately saw how bad she
they came immediately saw how bad she was boom right into the back of the
was boom right into the back of the
was boom right into the back of the ambulance straight to the hospital
ambulance straight to the hospital
ambulance straight to the hospital when she arrived my mom she weighed 85
when she arrived my mom she weighed 85
when she arrived my mom she weighed 85 pounds standing at 5 foot 10 so she
pounds standing at 5 foot 10 so she
pounds standing at 5 foot 10 so she wasn’t doing very well at all but this
wasn’t doing very well at all but this
wasn’t doing very well at all but this time after several appearances of the
time after several appearances of the
time after several appearances of the hospital they finally decided to keep
hospital they finally decided to keep
hospital they finally decided to keep her
her
her she got a diagnosis and her treatment
she got a diagnosis and her treatment
she got a diagnosis and her treatment started she finally started to do to do
started she finally started to do to do
started she finally started to do to do a little bit better
a little bit better
a little bit better chapter 3 no candles in the twilight so
chapter 3 no candles in the twilight so
chapter 3 no candles in the twilight so now my mom was in the hospital and she
now my mom was in the hospital and she
now my mom was in the hospital and she was slowly improving so I was able to
was slowly improving so I was able to
was slowly improving so I was able to shift the spotlight from her now on to
shift the spotlight from her now on to
shift the spotlight from her now on to myself I realized something wasn’t rape
myself I realized something wasn’t rape
myself I realized something wasn’t rape anxiety kept me from leaving the house
anxiety kept me from leaving the house
anxiety kept me from leaving the house anxiety kept me from engaging with
anxiety kept me from engaging with
anxiety kept me from engaging with anybody else or you know having a social
anybody else or you know having a social
anybody else or you know having a social life and I spent all of my time in my
life and I spent all of my time in my
life and I spent all of my time in my basement playing video games and reading
basement playing video games and reading
basement playing video games and reading books losing myself in these fantasy
books losing myself in these fantasy
books losing myself in these fantasy worlds and these stories because in my
worlds and these stories because in my
worlds and these stories because in my world and my story
world and my story
world and my story nothing was okay so then from there what
nothing was okay so then from there what
nothing was okay so then from there what happened well you know I wanted to
happened well you know I wanted to
happened well you know I wanted to figure out what was happening with me
figure out what was happening with me
figure out what was happening with me you know I had all these really
you know I had all these really
you know I had all these really difficult thoughts as well I was in my
difficult thoughts as well I was in my
difficult thoughts as well I was in my mind I was a loser and I was unlovable
mind I was a loser and I was unlovable
mind I was a loser and I was unlovable and I had to figure it out so I did what
and I had to figure it out so I did what
and I had to figure it out so I did what anybody in high school would have done
anybody in high school would have done
anybody in high school would have done in that moment and I started to watch
in that moment and I started to watch
in that moment and I started to watch dr. Phil
and so spent a lot of time watching dr.
and so spent a lot of time watching dr. Phil oh and after about six months of my
Phil oh and after about six months of my
Phil oh and after about six months of my daily practice I was still feeling
daily practice I was still feeling
daily practice I was still feeling anxious and still feeling very depressed
anxious and still feeling very depressed
anxious and still feeling very depressed but I did learn about this thing called
but I did learn about this thing called
but I did learn about this thing called self-talk self-talk is what you say to
self-talk self-talk is what you say to
self-talk self-talk is what you say to yourself in your head the things that
yourself in your head the things that
yourself in your head the things that only you can hear but you think
only you can hear but you think
only you can hear but you think everybody else in the world is thinking
everybody else in the world is thinking
everybody else in the world is thinking and I started to pay attention to myself
and I started to pay attention to myself
and I started to pay attention to myself talk and it was like being strapped down
talk and it was like being strapped down
talk and it was like being strapped down in this chair listening to this really
in this chair listening to this really
in this chair listening to this really loud recording about this horrible ugly
loud recording about this horrible ugly
loud recording about this horrible ugly unlovable loser of a person except the
unlovable loser of a person except the
unlovable loser of a person except the voice is my voice the person was me no
voice is my voice the person was me no
voice is my voice the person was me no wonder I felt the way that I felt but
wonder I felt the way that I felt but
wonder I felt the way that I felt but you know I wanted to beat that voice and
you know I wanted to beat that voice and
you know I wanted to beat that voice and prove that voice wrong and at 16 years
prove that voice wrong and at 16 years
prove that voice wrong and at 16 years old the way I felt
old the way I felt
old the way I felt I could do that was to get a girlfriend
I could do that was to get a girlfriend
I could do that was to get a girlfriend so that became my mission in life but
so that became my mission in life but
so that became my mission in life but not just any girl I had a crush on this
not just any girl I had a crush on this
not just any girl I had a crush on this girl from my grade 10 science class you
girl from my grade 10 science class you
girl from my grade 10 science class you know over the summer time so I thought
know over the summer time so I thought
know over the summer time so I thought when I go back to school in November or
when I go back to school in November or
when I go back to school in November or in September it’s gonna go down but I
in September it’s gonna go down but I
in September it’s gonna go down but I had one problem I didn’t know how to
had one problem I didn’t know how to
had one problem I didn’t know how to talk to girls at all what I did have a
talk to girls at all what I did have a
talk to girls at all what I did have a plan so my oldest brother he’s this
plan so my oldest brother he’s this
plan so my oldest brother he’s this really charming guy and he had a lot of
really charming guy and he had a lot of
really charming guy and he had a lot of people calling the house all the time
people calling the house all the time
people calling the house all the time we’re gonna call them friends and so he
we’re gonna call them friends and so he
we’re gonna call them friends and so he had these girls calling the house all
had these girls calling the house all
had these girls calling the house all the time and I noticed this and he
the time and I noticed this and he
the time and I noticed this and he answered the phone and it would be like
answered the phone and it would be like
answered the phone and it would be like hello and then his voice would drop
hello and then his voice would drop
hello and then his voice would drop octave what’s up this point he was
octave what’s up this point he was
octave what’s up this point he was talking to a girl so I ran up the stairs
talking to a girl so I ran up the stairs
talking to a girl so I ran up the stairs and I took up the other end as receiver
and I took up the other end as receiver
and I took up the other end as receiver real slowly yeah he be saying all these
real slowly yeah he be saying all these
real slowly yeah he be saying all these things to the girls and know the same
things to the girls and know the same
things to the girls and know the same things to different girls and I was
things to different girls and I was
things to different girls and I was working right so logically I started to
working right so logically I started to
working right so logically I started to write it down
write it down
write it down [Laughter]
[Laughter]
[Laughter] so anyway September rolls around and lo
so anyway September rolls around and lo
so anyway September rolls around and lo and behold this girl ends ends up in my
and behold this girl ends ends up in my
and behold this girl ends ends up in my first period class I’m like yes and you
first period class I’m like yes and you
first period class I’m like yes and you know I guess where I’m going with this
know I guess where I’m going with this
know I guess where I’m going with this is that we hit it off and we start to go
is that we hit it off and we start to go
is that we hit it off and we start to go out and you know she was really cool and
out and you know she was really cool and
out and you know she was really cool and she was funny and she was smart and most
she was funny and she was smart and most
she was funny and she was smart and most importantly she treated me really well
importantly she treated me really well
importantly she treated me really well but did this solve any of my problems
but did this solve any of my problems
but did this solve any of my problems no I still had debilitating anxiety I
no I still had debilitating anxiety I
no I still had debilitating anxiety I was still feeling uh you know these um
was still feeling uh you know these um
was still feeling uh you know these um the effects of the depression you know
the effects of the depression you know
the effects of the depression you know and eventually as we got closer I pulled
and eventually as we got closer I pulled
and eventually as we got closer I pulled away because I didn’t want to explain to
away because I didn’t want to explain to
away because I didn’t want to explain to her what was happening with me or the
her what was happening with me or the
her what was happening with me or the fact that I have a mom that hears voices
fact that I have a mom that hears voices
fact that I have a mom that hears voices so then you know the love life thing
so then you know the love life thing
so then you know the love life thing didn’t work out I thought what if I
didn’t work out I thought what if I
didn’t work out I thought what if I became good at something maybe I feel
became good at something maybe I feel
became good at something maybe I feel better so I started to rap I became good
better so I started to rap I became good
better so I started to rap I became good at that didn’t feel better
at that didn’t feel better
at that didn’t feel better started to play basketball became good
started to play basketball became good
started to play basketball became good at that didn’t really feel better then I
at that didn’t really feel better then I
at that didn’t really feel better then I started school in university first year
started school in university first year
started school in university first year and it was a huge culture shock for me I
and it was a huge culture shock for me I
and it was a huge culture shock for me I felt like I was just this poor black kid
felt like I was just this poor black kid
felt like I was just this poor black kid from the projects in this place where I
from the projects in this place where I
from the projects in this place where I didn’t feel like you know not a lot of
didn’t feel like you know not a lot of
didn’t feel like you know not a lot of people looked like me and I assumed
people looked like me and I assumed
people looked like me and I assumed everyone came from you know privilege to
everyone came from you know privilege to
everyone came from you know privilege to parent background you know the white
parent background you know the white
parent background you know the white picket fence and the dog all that and it
picket fence and the dog all that and it
picket fence and the dog all that and it just made me feel more alone and just
just made me feel more alone and just
just made me feel more alone and just exacerbated the feelings of anxiety and
exacerbated the feelings of anxiety and
exacerbated the feelings of anxiety and depression but a good thing happened
depression but a good thing happened
depression but a good thing happened that first year I started to take
that first year I started to take
that first year I started to take psychology and I learned that I wasn’t
psychology and I learned that I wasn’t
psychology and I learned that I wasn’t the problem I had something called
the problem I had something called
the problem I had something called depression and anxiety and it could be
depression and anxiety and it could be
depression and anxiety and it could be treated and I started to hope chapter
treated and I started to hope chapter
treated and I started to hope chapter four chasing dreams so now second year
four chasing dreams so now second year
four chasing dreams so now second year university yeah I thought I had it all I
university yeah I thought I had it all I
university yeah I thought I had it all I had a job at a nightclub and you know
had a job at a nightclub and you know
had a job at a nightclub and you know now I was making some money and I had to
now I was making some money and I had to
now I was making some money and I had to close and you know I had like a bunch of
close and you know I had like a bunch of
close and you know I had like a bunch of friends you know I was living the life
friends you know I was living the life
friends you know I was living the life except I felt worse than ever and every
except I felt worse than ever and every
except I felt worse than ever and every day I thought about you know doing the
day I thought about you know doing the
day I thought about you know doing the unthinkable and taking my own life but
unthinkable and taking my own life but
unthinkable and taking my own life but then something happened that would
then something happened that would
then something happened that would change all of that
change all of that
change all of that my best friend’s mom runs a daycare out
my best friend’s mom runs a daycare out
my best friend’s mom runs a daycare out of her apartment and I really like kids
of her apartment and I really like kids
of her apartment and I really like kids so I’d go over there all the time just
so I’d go over there all the time just
so I’d go over there all the time just to hang out and help out with the kids
to hang out and help out with the kids
to hang out and help out with the kids and I remember being
and I remember being
and I remember being there one time sitting on the couch and
there one time sitting on the couch and
there one time sitting on the couch and watching the kids they were playing and
watching the kids they were playing and
watching the kids they were playing and I watched and it just looked so happy
I watched and it just looked so happy
I watched and it just looked so happy and they looked so alive and I thought I
and they looked so alive and I thought I
and they looked so alive and I thought I want to be able to feel that again one
want to be able to feel that again one
want to be able to feel that again one day so at that point I committed to
day so at that point I committed to
day so at that point I committed to doing anything to feel alive again I
doing anything to feel alive again I
doing anything to feel alive again I started to see a therapist and she
started to see a therapist and she
started to see a therapist and she helped me more in six months then I was
helped me more in six months then I was
helped me more in six months then I was able to help myself in over six years
able to help myself in over six years
able to help myself in over six years she helped me identify things that I
she helped me identify things that I
she helped me identify things that I didn’t realize I was experiencing as
didn’t realize I was experiencing as
didn’t realize I was experiencing as trauma the domestic violence that
trauma the domestic violence that
trauma the domestic violence that happened between my parents not having
happened between my parents not having
happened between my parents not having my mother or my father around growing up
my mother or my father around growing up
my mother or my father around growing up you know the the fact that I grew up in
you know the the fact that I grew up in
you know the the fact that I grew up in this neighborhood where there was you
this neighborhood where there was you
this neighborhood where there was you know crime and poverty and all these
know crime and poverty and all these
know crime and poverty and all these difficult things that you know I didn’t
difficult things that you know I didn’t
difficult things that you know I didn’t realize all this was happening inside of
realize all this was happening inside of
realize all this was happening inside of me watching my mom almost died this was
me watching my mom almost died this was
me watching my mom almost died this was all traumatic so at that point you know
all traumatic so at that point you know
all traumatic so at that point you know she was able to say if we work you can
she was able to say if we work you can
she was able to say if we work you can develop the coping skills and you can
develop the coping skills and you can
develop the coping skills and you can get better so I said that’s cool let’s
get better so I said that’s cool let’s
get better so I said that’s cool let’s do it let’s do the work and then I
do it let’s do the work and then I
do it let’s do the work and then I started to get better and better and
started to get better and better and
started to get better and better and that I started to feel a lot better from
that I started to feel a lot better from
that I started to feel a lot better from there I was able to finish my my
there I was able to finish my my
there I was able to finish my my university degree and now I have a great
university degree and now I have a great
university degree and now I have a great job I’ve great friends and my mom is
job I’ve great friends and my mom is
job I’ve great friends and my mom is doing really well and she’s working and
doing really well and she’s working and
doing really well and she’s working and my father is even back in my life and
my father is even back in my life and
my father is even back in my life and I’ve been able to do all these really
I’ve been able to do all these really
I’ve been able to do all these really cool amazing things I’ve been on TV a
cool amazing things I’ve been on TV a
cool amazing things I’ve been on TV a bunch of times I’ve been in the
bunch of times I’ve been in the
bunch of times I’ve been in the newspapers I’ve been in a documentary
newspapers I’ve been in a documentary
newspapers I’ve been in a documentary now I’ve been traveling the world I’ve
now I’ve been traveling the world I’ve
now I’ve been traveling the world I’ve been speaking to thousands of people in
been speaking to thousands of people in
been speaking to thousands of people in Colombia higher than the US you know
Colombia higher than the US you know
Colombia higher than the US you know just this past year there was an event
just this past year there was an event
just this past year there was an event and the Prime Minister’s wife was
and the Prime Minister’s wife was
and the Prime Minister’s wife was supposed to speak and she wasn’t able to
supposed to speak and she wasn’t able to
supposed to speak and she wasn’t able to make it so guess what they call
so here I am now doing a TED talk like
so here I am now doing a TED talk like whoa so the most important thing the
whoa so the most important thing the
whoa so the most important thing the best thing is I got to go home every day
best thing is I got to go home every day
best thing is I got to go home every day to a lovely wife so my life right now is
to a lovely wife so my life right now is
to a lovely wife so my life right now is pretty damn dope but you know my story
pretty damn dope but you know my story
pretty damn dope but you know my story it’s a common story for a lot of kids
it’s a common story for a lot of kids
it’s a common story for a lot of kids around the world but the ending of my
around the world but the ending of my
around the world but the ending of my story is not very common most young
story is not very common most young
story is not very common most young people who have story similar to mine
people who have story similar to mine
people who have story similar to mine don’t have a happy ending so what can we
don’t have a happy ending so what can we
don’t have a happy ending so what can we do then to do better for these young
do then to do better for these young
do then to do better for these young people and I thought about what if we
people and I thought about what if we
people and I thought about what if we said to them instead of saying what’s
said to them instead of saying what’s
said to them instead of saying what’s wrong with you what if we said what’s
wrong with you what if we said what’s
wrong with you what if we said what’s wrong what if we designed our services
wrong what if we designed our services
wrong what if we designed our services to be more proactive than reactive what
to be more proactive than reactive what
to be more proactive than reactive what if instead of waiting for them to show
if instead of waiting for them to show
if instead of waiting for them to show up on our doorsteps we went and we
up on our doorsteps we went and we
up on our doorsteps we went and we showed up on theirs I think these things
showed up on theirs I think these things
showed up on theirs I think these things could make a huge difference so I
could make a huge difference so I
could make a huge difference so I challenge any adults who might be
challenge any adults who might be
challenge any adults who might be listening
listening
listening to make space for young people to tell
to make space for young people to tell
to make space for young people to tell their stories and for young people who
their stories and for young people who
their stories and for young people who might be struggling to tell your stories
might be struggling to tell your stories
might be struggling to tell your stories because I think stories can save lives I
because I think stories can save lives I
because I think stories can save lives I know that telling mine was able to save
know that telling mine was able to save
know that telling mine was able to save my life and I’m glad that I had the
my life and I’m glad that I had the
my life and I’m glad that I had the opportunity because I used to pray to
opportunity because I used to pray to
opportunity because I used to pray to God to bring an end to the rain I’m
God to bring an end to the rain I’m
God to bring an end to the rain I’m wondering if there would ever be an end
wondering if there would ever be an end
wondering if there would ever be an end to the pain I’m feeling like God why
to the pain I’m feeling like God why
to the pain I’m feeling like God why don’t you remember my name to the point
don’t you remember my name to the point
don’t you remember my name to the point I didn’t believe in heaven and sing I
I didn’t believe in heaven and sing I
I didn’t believe in heaven and sing I lost faith even though one never should
lost faith even though one never should
lost faith even though one never should yeah I had it horrible I should have
yeah I had it horrible I should have
yeah I had it horrible I should have understood it was all the tests that
understood it was all the tests that
understood it was all the tests that would make me stronger but it hit harder
would make me stronger but it hit harder
would make me stronger but it hit harder than a dunk by Vince Carter as they grew
than a dunk by Vince Carter as they grew
than a dunk by Vince Carter as they grew larger right tried to find the solutions
larger right tried to find the solutions
larger right tried to find the solutions to the mental pollution my personal
to the mental pollution my personal
to the mental pollution my personal revolution through music and support
revolution through music and support
revolution through music and support from my friends and my family I got to
from my friends and my family I got to
from my friends and my family I got to overcome the depression and tragedy far
overcome the depression and tragedy far
overcome the depression and tragedy far from living lavishly but rich in my
from living lavishly but rich in my
from living lavishly but rich in my spirit now whenever I pray I know that
spirit now whenever I pray I know that
spirit now whenever I pray I know that God hears it nothing comes near it this
God hears it nothing comes near it this
God hears it nothing comes near it this happiness I feel now everything I
happiness I feel now everything I
happiness I feel now everything I dreamed for feels like it’s real now
dreamed for feels like it’s real now
dreamed for feels like it’s real now [Applause]
[Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
you
you [Music]
”
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