[Applause] [Music]
[Music]
[Music] so basically we live in a world that is
so basically we live in a world that is
so basically we live in a world that is so sexually powerful and electric but so
so sexually powerful and electric but so
so sexually powerful and electric but so sexually violent that you don’t know
sexually violent that you don’t know
sexually violent that you don’t know whether to masturbate or carry a machete
whether to masturbate or carry a machete
whether to masturbate or carry a machete it’s true it’s true the thing about sex
it’s true it’s true the thing about sex
it’s true it’s true the thing about sex is that it’s so taboo but we wanted so
is that it’s so taboo but we wanted so
is that it’s so taboo but we wanted so damn that we want to feel it we want to
damn that we want to feel it we want to
damn that we want to feel it we want to stand by it we want to engage with it we
stand by it we want to engage with it we
stand by it we want to engage with it we want to take it out for dinner and
want to take it out for dinner and
want to take it out for dinner and message it a little too soon but we also
message it a little too soon but we also
message it a little too soon but we also want to pretend that it doesn’t exist
want to pretend that it doesn’t exist
want to pretend that it doesn’t exist the thing is speaking about our sex in
the thing is speaking about our sex in
the thing is speaking about our sex in groups is hard and it seems that there’s
groups is hard and it seems that there’s
groups is hard and it seems that there’s a little bit of a mass silence when was
a little bit of a mass silence when was
a little bit of a mass silence when was the last time you spoke about your
the last time you spoke about your
the last time you spoke about your staying power or your favorite sex
staying power or your favorite sex
staying power or your favorite sex positions or even your orgasms with
positions or even your orgasms with
positions or even your orgasms with those around you it would seem that
those around you it would seem that
those around you it would seem that there’s a little bit of a mass silence
there’s a little bit of a mass silence
there’s a little bit of a mass silence and we’re hiding gems of goodness and
and we’re hiding gems of goodness and
and we’re hiding gems of goodness and guidance from each other but we’re
guidance from each other but we’re
guidance from each other but we’re actually here to tell you about women
actually here to tell you about women
actually here to tell you about women talking about their sex most
talking about their sex most
talking about their sex most specifically African women and why this
specifically African women and why this
specifically African women and why this is important for us to do all the time
is important for us to do all the time
is important for us to do all the time because the thing is as women we don’t
because the thing is as women we don’t
because the thing is as women we don’t properly actively engage with our sex
properly actively engage with our sex
properly actively engage with our sex even because we tell ourselves to not be
even because we tell ourselves to not be
even because we tell ourselves to not be open about our trust game oh we are told
open about our trust game oh we are told
open about our trust game oh we are told that we shouldn’t as proper women be
that we shouldn’t as proper women be
that we shouldn’t as proper women be chatting about it but when it comes to
chatting about it but when it comes to
chatting about it but when it comes to ideas of our bodies our sex and our
ideas of our bodies our sex and our
ideas of our bodies our sex and our pleasure were more often than not silent
pleasure were more often than not silent
pleasure were more often than not silent and this hush-hush attitude allows for
and this hush-hush attitude allows for
and this hush-hush attitude allows for ideas of rape culture and accepting bad
ideas of rape culture and accepting bad
ideas of rape culture and accepting bad shags to seep in and settle
my rape culture let me clarify my rape
my rape culture let me clarify my rape culture will mean ideas of women’s
culture will mean ideas of women’s
culture will mean ideas of women’s bodies as something to be owned
bodies as something to be owned
bodies as something to be owned something to be conquered things like
something to be conquered things like
something to be conquered things like smashing the pussy giving her the D
smashing the pussy giving her the D
smashing the pussy giving her the D penetration all of these words imply
penetration all of these words imply
penetration all of these words imply being overpowered was we wait idly by as
being overpowered was we wait idly by as
being overpowered was we wait idly by as women for the phallic symbol to orbit
women for the phallic symbol to orbit
women for the phallic symbol to orbit and prepare for entry and the thing is
and prepare for entry and the thing is
and prepare for entry and the thing is were silent because how can we speak
were silent because how can we speak
were silent because how can we speak business that isn’t ours but it is our
business that isn’t ours but it is our
business that isn’t ours but it is our business were not meant to be silent
business were not meant to be silent
business were not meant to be silent during sex but active willing and
during sex but active willing and
during sex but active willing and engaged participants who know who what
engaged participants who know who what
engaged participants who know who what and why they are doing what they’re
and why they are doing what they’re
and why they are doing what they’re doing and this takes time and knowledge
doing and this takes time and knowledge
doing and this takes time and knowledge you don’t just simply wake up a sensei
you don’t just simply wake up a sensei
you don’t just simply wake up a sensei of sex and throw tricks around the table
of sex and throw tricks around the table
of sex and throw tricks around the table right you’ve got to study and this
right you’ve got to study and this
right you’ve got to study and this knowledge of how to handle your hotbox
knowledge of how to handle your hotbox
knowledge of how to handle your hotbox is going to come from within our own
is going to come from within our own
is going to come from within our own ranks it is some of the most powerful
ranks it is some of the most powerful
ranks it is some of the most powerful helpful conversations about a woman and
helpful conversations about a woman and
helpful conversations about a woman and her sex come from other women it’s not
her sex come from other women it’s not
her sex come from other women it’s not always Cosmo but that’s another story
always Cosmo but that’s another story
always Cosmo but that’s another story for another day and in order to like
for another day and in order to like
for another day and in order to like have this conversation you need to talk
have this conversation you need to talk
have this conversation you need to talk to each other and change the ideas and
to each other and change the ideas and
to each other and change the ideas and the narrative but in order to change the
the narrative but in order to change the
the narrative but in order to change the narrative we actually need to think
narrative we actually need to think
narrative we actually need to think about where we get these warped ideas
about where we get these warped ideas
about where we get these warped ideas about our sexuality from so African
about our sexuality from so African
about our sexuality from so African women are being silent about sex why
women are being silent about sex why
women are being silent about sex why let’s take it back a bit so colonization
let’s take it back a bit so colonization
let’s take it back a bit so colonization and religion have completely reshaped
and religion have completely reshaped
and religion have completely reshaped ideas and ultimately the expression of
ideas and ultimately the expression of
ideas and ultimately the expression of African sexuality um African women and
African sexuality um African women and
African sexuality um African women and men have been and to a great extent
men have been and to a great extent
men have been and to a great extent still are defined in terms of body
still are defined in terms of body
still are defined in terms of body deviancy and bestiality one only needs
deviancy and bestiality one only needs
deviancy and bestiality one only needs to look at pornography and the way that
to look at pornography and the way that
to look at pornography and the way that the black body is portrayed right it’s
the black body is portrayed right it’s
the black body is portrayed right it’s more often than not portrayed in a
more often than not portrayed in a
more often than not portrayed in a violent and animalistic way because no
violent and animalistic way because no
violent and animalistic way because no sensual sex for us no you know and
sensual sex for us no you know and
sensual sex for us no you know and another example is a photography project
another example is a photography project
another example is a photography project called jungle fever and this is done by
called jungle fever and this is done by
called jungle fever and this is done by a photographer called jean-paul good and
a photographer called jean-paul good and
a photographer called jean-paul good and the photographs over sexualized black
the photographs over sexualized black
the photographs over sexualized black women and exaggerated black features so
women and exaggerated black features so
women and exaggerated black features so much that it made them seem extreme
much that it made them seem extreme
much that it made them seem extreme natural and very very ridiculous and a
natural and very very ridiculous and a
natural and very very ridiculous and a painful example of how the female body
painful example of how the female body
painful example of how the female body was dehumanized as the story of Starkey
was dehumanized as the story of Starkey
was dehumanized as the story of Starkey Batman in 1810 20 year-old South African
Batman in 1810 20 year-old South African
Batman in 1810 20 year-old South African sake was exhibited in a cage in
sake was exhibited in a cage in
sake was exhibited in a cage in Piccadilly London she was forced to
Piccadilly London she was forced to
Piccadilly London she was forced to irate for curious onlookers who paid a
irate for curious onlookers who paid a
irate for curious onlookers who paid a couple of shillings for the fun and when
couple of shillings for the fun and when
couple of shillings for the fun and when she died in 1815 audiences gathered to
she died in 1815 audiences gathered to
she died in 1815 audiences gathered to see her bits her genitals were dissected
see her bits her genitals were dissected
see her bits her genitals were dissected in public and zoologist georges cuvier
in public and zoologist georges cuvier
in public and zoologist georges cuvier later presented circus genitals in a way
later presented circus genitals in a way
later presented circus genitals in a way to allow for spectators to see the
to allow for spectators to see the
to allow for spectators to see the nature of her labia and he wrote we did
nature of her labia and he wrote we did
nature of her labia and he wrote we did not at all perceive the remarkable
not at all perceive the remarkable
not at all perceive the remarkable particularity of her organization see
particularity of her organization see
particularity of her organization see genitals she held her apron carefully
genitals she held her apron carefully
genitals she held her apron carefully hidden between her thighs it was not
hidden between her thighs it was not
hidden between her thighs it was not until after her death that we knew she
until after her death that we knew she
until after her death that we knew she had it and by her apron they meant her
had it and by her apron they meant her
had it and by her apron they meant her genitals so it wasn’t until 2002 that
genitals so it wasn’t until 2002 that
genitals so it wasn’t until 2002 that you could see sad Keys pickled privates
you could see sad Keys pickled privates
you could see sad Keys pickled privates in a museum in Paris until 2002 and
in a museum in Paris until 2002 and
in a museum in Paris until 2002 and after which they were returned with the
after which they were returned with the
after which they were returned with the rest of her remains to Cape Town it’s
rest of her remains to Cape Town it’s
rest of her remains to Cape Town it’s painful isn’t it and then on top of that
painful isn’t it and then on top of that
painful isn’t it and then on top of that we were told how to dress by religious
we were told how to dress by religious
we were told how to dress by religious practice right where our bodies were was
practice right where our bodies were was
practice right where our bodies were was so over sexualized to the point where if
so over sexualized to the point where if
so over sexualized to the point where if we showed just a bit of skin we are
we showed just a bit of skin we are
we showed just a bit of skin we are flaunting our bodies and we are showing
flaunting our bodies and we are showing
flaunting our bodies and we are showing disregard for the body’s sacredness
disregard for the body’s sacredness
disregard for the body’s sacredness which is only meant to be for the eyes
which is only meant to be for the eyes
which is only meant to be for the eyes of our husbands where a naked woman or a
of our husbands where a naked woman or a
of our husbands where a naked woman or a partially covered woman may be raped and
partially covered woman may be raped and
partially covered woman may be raped and intimidated because she has seen a
intimidated because she has seen a
intimidated because she has seen a seducing men there is an idea within
seducing men there is an idea within
seducing men there is an idea within culture popular culture and amongst many
culture popular culture and amongst many
culture popular culture and amongst many African societies that Africa is very
African societies that Africa is very
African societies that Africa is very very conservative and male centered
very conservative and male centered
very conservative and male centered which actually undermines African sexual
which actually undermines African sexual
which actually undermines African sexual practices which has a deep deep history
practices which has a deep deep history
practices which has a deep deep history of not like putting to the side female
of not like putting to the side female
of not like putting to the side female pleasure we haven’t been a silent as we
pleasure we haven’t been a silent as we
pleasure we haven’t been a silent as we think about sex we actually haven’t in
think about sex we actually haven’t in
think about sex we actually haven’t in fact we have been so chatty about it
fact we have been so chatty about it
fact we have been so chatty about it because across the country
because across the country
because across the country they existed and continue to exist
they existed and continue to exist
they existed and continue to exist sexuality training schools in her paper
sexuality training schools in her paper
sexuality training schools in her paper oceanology the African erotic nakeeran
oceanology the African erotic nakeeran
oceanology the African erotic nakeeran seungu actually mentions a couple of
seungu actually mentions a couple of
seungu actually mentions a couple of these schools which um excuse me one
these schools which um excuse me one
these schools which um excuse me one second I have a list here they’re very
second I have a list here they’re very
second I have a list here they’re very hard to say so
hard to say so
hard to say so she mentioned these schools which
she mentioned these schools which
she mentioned these schools which include the Gullah and bass of Guinea
include the Gullah and bass of Guinea
include the Gullah and bass of Guinea Sierra Leone and Liberia the lower bit
Sierra Leone and Liberia the lower bit
Sierra Leone and Liberia the lower bit of Senegal the Depot of their dad way of
of Senegal the Depot of their dad way of
of Senegal the Depot of their dad way of Ghana the Tonga of the of Zambia the
Ghana the Tonga of the of Zambia the
Ghana the Tonga of the of Zambia the Makua of Mozambique and many many more
Makua of Mozambique and many many more
Makua of Mozambique and many many more across the continent and all of these
across the continent and all of these
across the continent and all of these schools were created to impart girls
schools were created to impart girls
schools were created to impart girls with the knowledge on sexuality pleasure
with the knowledge on sexuality pleasure
with the knowledge on sexuality pleasure and to create a female identity they
and to create a female identity they
and to create a female identity they were taught things like sexual cues they
were taught things like sexual cues they
were taught things like sexual cues they were taught sexual enhancers for example
were taught sexual enhancers for example
were taught sexual enhancers for example these waste beads that were made of
these waste beads that were made of
these waste beads that were made of glass and pearls and sometimes clay and
glass and pearls and sometimes clay and
glass and pearls and sometimes clay and they functioned the sex toys I mean
they functioned the sex toys I mean
they functioned the sex toys I mean these women were taught to ignite
these women were taught to ignite
these women were taught to ignite passions through a look a walk dance
passions through a look a walk dance
passions through a look a walk dance moves gestures pelvic movements
moves gestures pelvic movements
moves gestures pelvic movements aphrodisiacs everything that you would
aphrodisiacs everything that you would
aphrodisiacs everything that you would want to know about sex even the sounds
want to know about sex even the sounds
want to know about sex even the sounds to make during the act and apart from
to make during the act and apart from
to make during the act and apart from this some tribes had marital advises
this some tribes had marital advises
this some tribes had marital advises that it that advised the goal or the
that it that advised the goal or the
that it that advised the goal or the married couple in the art of sex for
married couple in the art of sex for
married couple in the art of sex for example in Mali the advisor joins the
example in Mali the advisor joins the
example in Mali the advisor joins the newlywed couple in the bedroom on the
newlywed couple in the bedroom on the
newlywed couple in the bedroom on the wedding night I know sometimes we need
wedding night I know sometimes we need
wedding night I know sometimes we need that little extra Harold
that little extra Harold
that little extra Harold we cannot be out here but a similar
we cannot be out here but a similar
we cannot be out here but a similar practice exists in Nigeria amongst the
practice exists in Nigeria amongst the
practice exists in Nigeria amongst the east Akira tribe the bagna cauda of
east Akira tribe the bagna cauda of
east Akira tribe the bagna cauda of Uganda the TTA among the shona in
Uganda the TTA among the shona in
Uganda the TTA among the shona in Zimbabwe and the Kiowa of Zambia these
Zimbabwe and the Kiowa of Zambia these
Zimbabwe and the Kiowa of Zambia these advisors not only ensured that the girls
advisors not only ensured that the girls
advisors not only ensured that the girls first sexual experience was pleasurable
first sexual experience was pleasurable
first sexual experience was pleasurable but also calmed all of the anxieties
but also calmed all of the anxieties
but also calmed all of the anxieties that we have about sex you know and so
that we have about sex you know and so
that we have about sex you know and so now this space of knowledge sharing was
now this space of knowledge sharing was
now this space of knowledge sharing was not only reserved for the experts
not only reserved for the experts
not only reserved for the experts sometimes simply gathering was a way of
sometimes simply gathering was a way of
sometimes simply gathering was a way of growing what you knew for example in
growing what you knew for example in
growing what you knew for example in Rwanda and other spaces within the
Rwanda and other spaces within the
Rwanda and other spaces within the continent is the act of Lobby or
continent is the act of Lobby or
continent is the act of Lobby or elongation
elongation
elongation so this is what you would think but to
so this is what you would think but to
so this is what you would think but to give a little bit of context it’s when a
give a little bit of context it’s when a
give a little bit of context it’s when a woman or sorry a girl of puberty age
woman or sorry a girl of puberty age
woman or sorry a girl of puberty age gently pulls her inner labia
gently pulls her inner labia
gently pulls her inner labia out and away from her body this is done
out and away from her body this is done
out and away from her body this is done using special herbs that the girls are
using special herbs that the girls are
using special herbs that the girls are taught to look for in the room on these
taught to look for in the room on these
taught to look for in the room on these bushes sometimes this may be a little
bushes sometimes this may be a little
bushes sometimes this may be a little bit uncomfortable for people but it’s
bit uncomfortable for people but it’s
bit uncomfortable for people but it’s done in groups one piece one piece that
done in groups one piece one piece that
done in groups one piece one piece that we read talks about how girls would sit
we read talks about how girls would sit
we read talks about how girls would sit in rows in boarding school and gently
in rows in boarding school and gently
in rows in boarding school and gently pull each other’s l’viyah while catching
pull each other’s l’viyah while catching
pull each other’s l’viyah while catching up on the latest gossip the piece yes
up on the latest gossip the piece yes
up on the latest gossip the piece yes and see there’s a little there’s a few
and see there’s a little there’s a few
and see there’s a little there’s a few shocked faces and thing but this
shocked faces and thing but this
shocked faces and thing but this happened and what the piece then goes on
happened and what the piece then goes on
happened and what the piece then goes on to speak about is how this gave the
to speak about is how this gave the
to speak about is how this gave the girls a sense of belonging but also
girls a sense of belonging but also
girls a sense of belonging but also taught them that it was not something to
taught them that it was not something to
taught them that it was not something to be ashamed of it prepared their bodies
be ashamed of it prepared their bodies
be ashamed of it prepared their bodies not only to give pleasure but to receive
not only to give pleasure but to receive
not only to give pleasure but to receive it because the act of tapping the penis
it because the act of tapping the penis
it because the act of tapping the penis on these lobby a would cause a woman to
on these lobby a would cause a woman to
on these lobby a would cause a woman to ejaculate which is actually not to be
ejaculate which is actually not to be
ejaculate which is actually not to be confused with urinating when you squirt
confused with urinating when you squirt
confused with urinating when you squirt ladies you did not pee I mean looking at
ladies you did not pee I mean looking at
ladies you did not pee I mean looking at these practices you can see that the
these practices you can see that the
these practices you can see that the community is placed a really really good
community is placed a really really good
community is placed a really really good great value on a woman’s positive sexual
great value on a woman’s positive sexual
great value on a woman’s positive sexual experience in fact the existence of this
experience in fact the existence of this
experience in fact the existence of this institution strongly suggests the
institution strongly suggests the
institution strongly suggests the importance of sexuality in the
importance of sexuality in the
importance of sexuality in the well-being of the person and the
well-being of the person and the
well-being of the person and the community so now these cultural spaces
community so now these cultural spaces
community so now these cultural spaces bring about and instill the idea of the
bring about and instill the idea of the
bring about and instill the idea of the power of the devouring vagina how
power of the devouring vagina how
power of the devouring vagina how beautiful is that phrase devouring
beautiful is that phrase devouring
beautiful is that phrase devouring vagina audience participation now people
vagina audience participation now people
vagina audience participation now people say it with me now devouring vaginas
say it with me now devouring vaginas
say it with me now devouring vaginas thank you oh this is a phrase lifted
thank you oh this is a phrase lifted
thank you oh this is a phrase lifted from the paper that we mentioned before
from the paper that we mentioned before
from the paper that we mentioned before by in Karen’s egg ooh and it’s required
by in Karen’s egg ooh and it’s required
by in Karen’s egg ooh and it’s required reading for all if you’ve got a piece of
reading for all if you’ve got a piece of
reading for all if you’ve got a piece of paper write this down in this paper she
paper write this down in this paper she
paper write this down in this paper she begins to unpack the idea of the power
begins to unpack the idea of the power
begins to unpack the idea of the power of the vagina within the African erotic
of the vagina within the African erotic
of the vagina within the African erotic ontology do you see these big words for
ontology do you see these big words for
ontology do you see these big words for big ideas and how this is central both
big ideas and how this is central both
big ideas and how this is central both as a social and individual good
as a social and individual good
as a social and individual good so she speaks about the vagina not just
so she speaks about the vagina not just
so she speaks about the vagina not just being a passive organ that awaits
being a passive organ that awaits
being a passive organ that awaits penetration but we actually need to
penetration but we actually need to
penetration but we actually need to think of it as engulfing or devouring
think of it as engulfing or devouring
think of it as engulfing or devouring the penis because this gives the vagina
the penis because this gives the vagina
the penis because this gives the vagina incredible
incredible
incredible power and makes it a lot more active
power and makes it a lot more active
power and makes it a lot more active right think of it like the act of eating
right think of it like the act of eating
right think of it like the act of eating when you eat something you will set your
when you eat something you will set your
when you eat something you will set your power and your will over it but this
power and your will over it but this
power and your will over it but this does not in any way take away from the
does not in any way take away from the
does not in any way take away from the power of what is being consumed so we
power of what is being consumed so we
power of what is being consumed so we are not saying the penis is powerless no
are not saying the penis is powerless no
are not saying the penis is powerless no we’re just recognizing the power of the
we’re just recognizing the power of the
we’re just recognizing the power of the vagina during no guys before people get
vagina during no guys before people get
vagina during no guys before people get uncomfortable and testy
uncomfortable and testy
uncomfortable and testy so we’re speaking about a view of
so we’re speaking about a view of
so we’re speaking about a view of sexuality that not only celebrates the
sexuality that not only celebrates the
sexuality that not only celebrates the penis and male sexualities which is what
penis and male sexualities which is what
penis and male sexualities which is what our media does most of the time right
our media does most of the time right
our media does most of the time right and what we do most of the time but
and what we do most of the time but
and what we do most of the time but we’re speaking about a view of sexuality
we’re speaking about a view of sexuality
we’re speaking about a view of sexuality that there recognizes the power of the
that there recognizes the power of the
that there recognizes the power of the vagina and ultimately the power and
vagina and ultimately the power and
vagina and ultimately the power and importance of female sexuality so truth
importance of female sexuality so truth
importance of female sexuality so truth be told women coming together to help
be told women coming together to help
be told women coming together to help each other through deep times is nothing
each other through deep times is nothing
each other through deep times is nothing new and there is no reason we can’t do
new and there is no reason we can’t do
new and there is no reason we can’t do it in terms of sex in a modern
it in terms of sex in a modern
it in terms of sex in a modern Chardonnay sipping session sort of way
Chardonnay sipping session sort of way
Chardonnay sipping session sort of way and other than bursting into each
and other than bursting into each
and other than bursting into each other’s bedrooms or wherever else it is
other’s bedrooms or wherever else it is
other’s bedrooms or wherever else it is you like to have sex the way to do it is
you like to have sex the way to do it is
you like to have sex the way to do it is to speak about it randomly and loudly
to speak about it randomly and loudly
to speak about it randomly and loudly and luckily for us not do it do it in
and luckily for us not do it do it in
and luckily for us not do it do it in cafes and bars in your rooms whatever it
cafes and bars in your rooms whatever it
cafes and bars in your rooms whatever it is and luckily for us there are a number
is and luckily for us there are a number
is and luckily for us there are a number of women on the African continent who
of women on the African continent who
of women on the African continent who were doing it in a very funky squat
were doing it in a very funky squat
were doing it in a very funky squat while you take a selfie kind of way for
while you take a selfie kind of way for
while you take a selfie kind of way for example we’ve got dr. T who is a medical
example we’ve got dr. T who is a medical
example we’ve got dr. T who is a medical doctor and is wisdom personified not
doctor and is wisdom personified not
doctor and is wisdom personified not only offline but online as well because
only offline but online as well because
only offline but online as well because she hosts workshops she has an
she hosts workshops she has an
she hosts workshops she has an incredible Twitter account and she has a
incredible Twitter account and she has a
incredible Twitter account and she has a vlog some other photos as well look
vlog some other photos as well look
vlog some other photos as well look that’s from one of her vlogs and if you
that’s from one of her vlogs and if you
that’s from one of her vlogs and if you like something a little
like something a little
like something a little not-safe-for-work and a little bit of
not-safe-for-work and a little bit of
not-safe-for-work and a little bit of the art of storytelling
the art of storytelling
the art of storytelling there’s adventures from the bedrooms of
there’s adventures from the bedrooms of
there’s adventures from the bedrooms of African women which has a story or two
African women which has a story or two
African women which has a story or two in terms of podcasts we’ve got black
in terms of podcasts we’ve got black
in terms of podcasts we’ve got black women be like that’s actually the woman
women be like that’s actually the woman
women be like that’s actually the woman who runs it who have spoken about things
who runs it who have spoken about things
who runs it who have spoken about things like masturbation dining below the belt
like masturbation dining below the belt
like masturbation dining below the belt and also faking orgasms and in Kenya
and also faking orgasms and in Kenya
and also faking orgasms and in Kenya there’s the spread podcast which is two
there’s the spread podcast which is two
there’s the spread podcast which is two women who speak about a whole host of
women who speak about a whole host of
women who speak about a whole host of very very sexy topics
very very sexy topics
very very sexy topics and then holla Africa which is our
and then holla Africa which is our
and then holla Africa which is our organization recently went on a safe sex
organization recently went on a safe sex
organization recently went on a safe sex and pleasure journey when we hosted a
and pleasure journey when we hosted a
and pleasure journey when we hosted a bunch of dialogues and we had a workshop
bunch of dialogues and we had a workshop
bunch of dialogues and we had a workshop and we produced a manual and in these
and we produced a manual and in these
and we produced a manual and in these conversations and gatherings we tackled
conversations and gatherings we tackled
conversations and gatherings we tackled everything from kink to keeping your sex
everything from kink to keeping your sex
everything from kink to keeping your sex toys clean to consent which is a big
toys clean to consent which is a big
toys clean to consent which is a big issue right now and to a million and one
issue right now and to a million and one
issue right now and to a million and one uses for clingfilm
uses for clingfilm
uses for clingfilm there’s a lot to do out there there are
there’s a lot to do out there there are
there’s a lot to do out there there are a lot of uses for clingfilm you’ll be
a lot of uses for clingfilm you’ll be
a lot of uses for clingfilm you’ll be surprised but all of these examples that
surprised but all of these examples that
surprised but all of these examples that we’ve just mentioned of a merely
we’ve just mentioned of a merely
we’ve just mentioned of a merely repackaged spaces of all that African
repackaged spaces of all that African
repackaged spaces of all that African women are using to discuss this match
women are using to discuss this match
women are using to discuss this match and these need to be replicated they
and these need to be replicated they
and these need to be replicated they need to be grown and they need to be
need to be grown and they need to be
need to be grown and they need to be done in different ways so when women
done in different ways so when women
done in different ways so when women come together in these spaces to speak
come together in these spaces to speak
come together in these spaces to speak about their sex they just they draw
about their sex they just they draw
about their sex they just they draw strength and because you realize that
strength and because you realize that
strength and because you realize that there’s safety in numbers you realize
there’s safety in numbers you realize
there’s safety in numbers you realize that there is knowledge in numbers when
that there is knowledge in numbers when
that there is knowledge in numbers when women speak about these things they rip
women speak about these things they rip
women speak about these things they rip apart the cloak of silence that brings
apart the cloak of silence that brings
apart the cloak of silence that brings about fear and shame because you realize
about fear and shame because you realize
about fear and shame because you realize we’re all in this together you’re not
we’re all in this together you’re not
we’re all in this together you’re not the only one who thinks your nipples are
the only one who thinks your nipples are
the only one who thinks your nipples are shaped funny or has masturbated you are
shaped funny or has masturbated you are
shaped funny or has masturbated you are not the only one who has fantasized or
not the only one who has fantasized or
not the only one who has fantasized or faked orgasms you’re not the only one
faked orgasms you’re not the only one
faked orgasms you’re not the only one who has tried at that thing and liked it
that what the assault that happened to
that what the assault that happened to you the other night actually shouldn’t
you the other night actually shouldn’t
you the other night actually shouldn’t have happened that you are not meant to
have happened that you are not meant to
have happened that you are not meant to be ashamed you are not meant to be
be ashamed you are not meant to be
be ashamed you are not meant to be afraid and you’re not meant to be in
afraid and you’re not meant to be in
afraid and you’re not meant to be in pain because you know what you are
pain because you know what you are
pain because you know what you are actually not the only one
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