Today, we’re going to talk about how you can
leave your comfort zone.
And as always guys, as you’re listening
if you hear something that really, really resonates with you
please leave it in the comments below
and put quotes around it
so other people can be inspired.
And also as you write things down
you’re much more likely to keep it in here as well.
Enjoy.
(light upbeat music)
(inspiring music)
– If you’re sitting there
comfortable in what you’re doing
you can be sure
with your nice awards of number one here
number one here, number one because I’ve got.
And number one this one, number one that one.
Somebody’s out there waiting to pluck you
and you can’t get comfortable.
And at that rate of change
if you start seeing stuff, you got to move.
(inspiring music)
– If you’re going to get in the zone
if you’re going to do fourth quarter living
you’ve got to be comfortable hitting a wall.
If I got any runners out there
any fighters out there
any athletes out there
anybody that’s ever stressed the limits
you know that in order to get to the zone
you got to hit that wall first.
You got to hit that brick wall first.
What does that mean?
You got to get to a place in your life
where all your strength is gone
and you’re no longer operating on strength
but now you begin to operate on will.
You get, listen to me.
You get to a place where you’re not
it’s not this no more.
It’s not your strength, it’s not your natural strength.
You offer will, and many of you I declare right now
many of you have never gotten to will.
You never operated on will
and so you got to hit the wall.
And what I mean by hitting the wall
is if I run for 30 minutes right?
If I run for 30 minutes, I got to say to myself
“Every time you run Eric, you got to get to 35 now.
“You got to go five more.”
Once I get to 30 my body say, “Yo ET let’s stop.”
Because the last five days we eatin’ 30.
We did 30 Eric, it’s time to stop.
We did 30 minutes and what I got to do
is I got to push it to the limits.
I got to push it to the limit.
I got to be willing to hit the wall.
I got to be willing to get past crying.
I got to be willing to get past hunger.
I got to get past self-defeat saying, “You can’t do it.”
I got to be willing to get past low self-esteem
and say, “I deserve it.”
If anybody else deserves it, I deserve it.
It’s mine, listen to me.
You got to be willing to hit that wall.
And for most of you, when you get to that wall
you give up, you quit.
You got to get to the place
where you can hit the wall.
You have to get to a place
where you become comfortable
with being uncomfortable.
Imma show you again.
Well, I got to show you again.
I got to show you again.
You got to squeeze it.
You got to squeeze it, my aunt said, “Put the contraption on
“And squeeze it boy.” “Why?”
“Because I need you to get every single thing
“You can get out of it.”
And I discovered that when I cut that thing open
the way my aunt does it
it’s little or no toothpaste left.
But when I did it the way we used to do it
it’s a whole bunch of stuff
and I’m leaving you saying this.
It’s a lot of ya’ll.
If you keep going the rate you’re going right now
when you die, you’re going to have a whole bunch left.
You going to die with a whole lot of ideas left.
You going to die with a whole lot of energy left.
But man when I’m running
there are times when I run
and I get to the end of my run
I know I ain’t done nothing.
Why? Because when I finish I got too much energy left.
I got too much strength left.
I’m still breathing normally.
I know I hadn’t put my all into it.
I’m asking you to know what your limits are alright?
Because you got to be able to measure where you are.
Because you can’t get to where you’re going
if you don’t know where you are.
You have to be able to measure where you are.
But once you measure it
we got to hit that wall.
Once we measure it, we got to start squeezing
so we can get more out of it.
And then once we’ve hit that wall
we don’t quit, we don’t give up.
We push a switch called will
and we start using our willpower.
We go into will, yes we tired!
Yes we’re hungry!
Yes the mind is saying, “Give up!”
Yes it said, “Quit.”
But we cannot quit because we realize
we have not reached a goal yet.
This is not the goal.
This is not what I dreamed about.
This is not what I said I was going to do.
This isn’t what I talked about.
This is not what it looks like.
I got to squeeze.
And then once we get past that place.
Once we get past that 30 minutes
or that 35, or that 40
or that 45, or that 50
and once we get into that hour with our will
we become comfortable with being uncomfortable.
We no longer thrive to be in a comfort zone.
We no longer place ourselves in positions
that make us feel good.
We no longer put ourselves in positions
that make us comfortable.
That gives us that warm, fuzzy feeling.
Because listen here boo, some of which you want
some of which you trying to get
ain’t in the comfort zone.
And so if what you want
is not in the comfort zone
you got to come out of the comfort zone
to get what you want.
– The comfort zone is one of the greatest enemies
of human potential and of your potential.
When people get into a comfort zone
they strive to stay in that comfort zone.
Even if they’re unhappy with their situation.
Often their whole lives pass them by
while they’re furnishing and reinforcing
their little rut of medium performance.
You need the courage to continually move yourself
in the direction of your biggest goals and ambitions.
You need to be willing to face discomfort
in order for you to grow.
You need the courage to launch in faith
with no guarantees of success.
Someone once wrote, “If every obstacle
“Must first be overcome
“Nothing will ever get done.”
Courageous people are those who have a dream
and set a goal.
They make a plan, and they take the first step
with no assurances and no guarantees
that their efforts will result in success.
However, if you look upon every step forward
as a learning experience
and every set-back as a valuable lesson
that has been sent to you to make you stronger and better
you will not be afraid to launch in faith
into the unknown.
You need the courage to risk failure.
You need the courage to endure constant set-backs
and disappointments and temporary defeats.
You need to learn to deal with failure
by realizing that failure is an indispensable
prerequisite for success.
You can’t succeed without failing
and failing lots of times.
Remember that wonderful quote from Thomas J. Watson Sr.
the founder of IBM.
He said, “If you want to be successful faster
“You must double your rate of failure.”
He said, “Success lies on the far side of failure.”
– See this line?
That’s called the terror barrier.
Yeah, jumping it isn’t it?
And on the other side of the terror barrier
is something we call freedom.
And you know, very few people get through
that terror barrier.
It’s rather sad.
Freedom is available to everyone.
There isn’t anyone that cannot live
the way they want to live.
See?
Why don’t they?
Why don’t they?
They don’t know.
And they don’t even know they don’t know.
Now I’m going to show you
why people experience buyers remorse
when they buy something they really want
and then they back away.
When they go to move and they don’t.
They go to change jobs and they don’t.
They go to move to another city and they don’t.
Why?
Fear causes them to stay where they are.
Here’s the individual, the X represents the unknown factor.
The paradigm.
Now there’s a power flowing into this individuals mind
and they can make anything out of it they want.
Remember we said we had the ability to choose?
What did they choose?
They choose thoughts that are in harmony with the paradigm.
Now here’s an important point.
The paradigm controls the vibration of this thing
we call our body.
Our body is a molecular instrument.
That’s really what it is, it’s a mass of molecules
in a very high speed of vibration.
The vibration that the body is in
on a conscious level, we call feeling.
When a person says they feel this way
or they feel that way
what they’re really doing is describing
the vibration they’re in.
Now, they choose thoughts
that harmonize with the vibration that they’re in
so they feel comfortable.
They may not like the results
but they’re comfortable.
Now let’s move ahead.
Let’s take a look here.
Those people are getting X type results
and they don’t like it.
Do you know what the problem with them?
They’re in bondage, these people are locked up.
Do you know, paradigm is like keeping a person in a prison.
Only there’s no locks on the door.
They can open the prison to walk out into freedom
anytime they want, and they don’t.
They keep getting the same results
over and over and over again.
They’re in bondage.
Now, let’s go ahead.
Here’s the same person.
X type conditioning, X type vibration.
The power is flowing into them
and for some strange reason
from left field, baboom!
In comes a Y type idea.
What is a Y type idea?
The Y type idea represents anything
that you might want to do that you’re not doing.
It might be move to another city, change jobs.
Sell the house, buy the farm.
Whatever it may be.
Ask the little girl for the date.
Ask the guy to go to lunch.
Go make the sale.
Buy what you want.
Go where you want to go.
That’s the Y idea.
But as long as the Y idea is just in the conscious mind
it’s just going to be an intellectual exercise.
It’s never going to happen.
So how do we make it happen?
Well, that’s when everything goes haywire.
Here we are here.
Same person okay?
The power flows in, and what do they do?
They got the Y type idea.
Now, for some strange reason they know
that they’ve got to get emotionally involved
if they’re going to act on that idea.
They don’t understand what’s going to happen.
But clearly understand this
your central nervous system
is the most complex electrical system in the universe.
The central nervous system
is mind-boggling.
It would make the electrical system in a super computer
look like a toy.
Now the second you take the idea from your intellect
and impress it upon the subject of mind
that’s when all hell breaks loose.
Because the body moves into an XY vibration.
It’s not an X vibration.
Not the one that we’re comfortable with.
May not like the results but we’re comfortable.
No, on a conscious level
everything is going crazy.
On a conscious level, we experience doubt.
The doubt turns into an emotion called fear
and that fear is expressed through the body as anxiety.
See that person is getting emotionally involved
to move ahead.
Do you know what happens?
They hit that terror barrier and they bounce off it
and right back into bondage.
And they’re so relieved to get back there.
They’re back where they’re comfortable.
They’ve canceled the sale.
They’ve decided not to move.
They’re going to stay in the job that they don’t like.
At least they’re comfortable.
Now that’s not a very good way to live.
And you know something?
That’s something everybody experiences
if they’re going to grow.
You’re going to hit that terror barrier.
See the terror barrier is going beyond where you’re at.
Going to a new level.
I’m going to tell you something.
When I set a goal
if it doesn’t scare and excite me at the same time
I know I’m going in the wrong direction.
Now I also understand
that my paradigm is going to try and get me
to bounce back to where I was.
It doesn’t want me to move ahead.
I don’t want to live there.
I lived there for the first 26 years of my life.
And for the last 50, I’ve had a phenomenal life
and it just keeps getting better.
And I want you to do the same thing.
Understand what I’ve just said.
I’m going to back this up.
They got emotionally involved in the Y idea
that moved their body into a different vibration.
On a conscious level, they’re experiencing
some crazy stuff.
They start to doubt their ability.
“Oh I’ll never be able to pay for it.”
They experience fear.
The fear expresses itself as anxiety.
And bang, you bounce off that terror barrier
and you’re right back.
“I might not be earning much here but I know what it is.”
“I would love to move there but I’m comfortable here.
“I think I’ll just stay here.”
These people are acting like they have a contract
to live forever and they don’t.
Do you know what to do?
Say I’m going to get rid of all that.
I understand it’s there, but I don’t want any part of it.
And I’m going to go crashing right through that terror barrier.
Now does that get rid of the X energy?
No, the X energy is still there you see.
But at least you’re over into freedom.
You made the move, you did it.
And if you continue to feed the right information
into your mind, keep feeding that Y idea
keep getting emotionally involved in the Y idea.
You’re there, you’re on the road.
Keep doing that.
You’re going to find that the paradigm is going to change
and it will just all go away.
And you know where you’re living?
In freedom, you’re living where you want to live.
Buyers remorse is when you cancel the sale.
Buyers remorse is when you stop just before
you buy what you really want.
Before you go for the thing
that’s going to change your life and you know it.
It’s not moving to the other city.
It’s not starting the business of your dreams.
It’s not stepping out and betting on yourself.
That’s a terror barrier that’s causing that.
And if you don’t learn to go through the terror barrier
I’m going to tell you something
you’re going to stay right where you are
for the rest of your days.
That’s not a good place to be.
What did Joseph Campbell say?
So true.
“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.”
– Starting with Lincoln Lawyer
was a time when I said I wanted to recalibrate
my relationship with my career.
I remember saying that, I remember thinking my career is
I’m enjoying it.
I love what it’s given me, I like going to work.
I like the things I’ve been doing
but everything I started reading.
I felt like oh, it’s another version of something I’ve done
or I feel like I can do it next week.
And I remember going, well wait a minute.
Before you get mad at thinking you can
do something next week
that’s a valid feeling.
Don’t just say no to something because you feel like
you can actually do it.
But then I said okay, fair.
I’ll shake with you on that McConaughey but.
(audience laughs)
Let me find something that I don’t know how
or what to do with that next week or the week after.
Let me find something that I really like
but I’m going oh, I’m not sure.
Them that scares me that shakes my floor.
And I was fortunate enough
because that schedule F check I got
in Angels in the Outfield
to know that my rent was paid.
I was fortunate enough to know my kids were going to eat.
I was just shepherding my first son into the world.
So I had that to take care of my time.
And I said it’s a great time to go into the shadows
and be a father and sit back
and see if something turns you on from the inside out.
If something finds you, if you’re the target
that can draw in the air.
But let’s, we’re okay.
Rent’s paid, kids are going to eat.
We can take some time off.
I no way was thinking, “Oh I’m done.”
But I didn’t know how long the dry spell was going to go.
So I said no to some of the things
that were similar to what I had been doing before
and it took a while.
I had to sit down with my agent and say
“Hey, I’m really going to do this.
“I need your help with my commitment to this
“Because after eight months if the same thing comes in
“With the big 10 million dollar paycheck
“It starts to read better.”
(audience laughs)
It just does, I promise you.
I mean the same words.
(audience laughs)
Suddenly it’s kind of, I think this thing’s great.
(audience laughs)
I think I can find an angle.
No, I can make it a different experience.
So I said, “I’m going to need your help
“Hunkering down here and saying no to some things
“And so I’m going to need you to be a gate keeper.
“One to keep from being too, let’s be real clear.
“I’m looking for some different things to do.”
He held up, he handled that.
My wife, we said we don’t know how long it’s going to be dry.
Then after they quit sending me those
then it did get dry.
Then nothing came for about a year.
There was nothing.
And I didn’t have any sleepless nights
or oh my gosh, it was like no I’ll find something.
I’ll write, I was writing a lot.
I was turning myself on creatively
and as I’ve said, I had my first son to shepherd
into the world.
And then the funny thing happened.
The beautiful thing happened.
That somehow the target drew the arrow
and I think my opinion is
I became a new good idea.
By removing myself.
I became William Friedkin calls for the first.
Steven Soderbergh calls for the first time.
Somehow in that two years, I became a fresh new idea
that I don’t think I was two, three years prior.
How that works, I’m not sure
because I didn’t send a memo out.
(audience laughs)
You know?
But it did happen.
– The people who’ve been living a caged life
after a period of time
of watching enough people go by
who are succeeding
if maturity lands on them
it lands on them with an impulse to say
“I’ve got to take control over the direction of my life.
“I’ve got to break free from these bars
“Because I’ve set them up.”
At some point, we come to realize I think in maturity
that we set our own cages.
We build our own bars.
And that there was always a door over here
that we could get out of
but we never made the choice to.
And when we finally decide to change our life
we’re more likely to go out that door
but we always have to remember
you know, never forget that when you knock
on the door of opportunity
that it is work who answers.
You know, it’s going to take a lot of work to change your life.
To break free from the bars, to get going again.
But I think that’s the great opportunity.
And when people finally break through that cage
and they get out in the open
and have more freedom in their life
that kind of life has a quality too.
It feels incredibly different.
That kind of life feels more free.
And that kind of life over a period of time is incredible
because you have more freedom to direct yourself
more freedom to do things
and what ends up is people end up with deeper skills.
They end up you know, chasing their passions more often.
That often as they get on a roll
they start becoming more successful.
As they become more successful
the things they think that they wanted in their lives
come into their lives.
You know, they got the two car garage
the white picket fence, the house
the kids, the friends, the dinner parties.
You know, enough to get by and maybe a little bit more.
And soon after a period of time
that excitement of that breaking free
and getting into that new kind of life
that kind of life, it feels more comfortable.
So we call it the comfortable life.
And in that comfortable life, we do feel that way.
We feel a sense of satisfaction.
A greater sense of confidence about who we are.
About what life is really about.
About where we’re going in life.
We feel heightened degrees of competency.
Knowledge, skills, abilities.
We feel like we kind of got our life under control.
Things are good.
But over a period of time in the comfortable life
something also rattles within and stirs within.
Maybe not a frustration
but maybe somewhat of a sense of restlessness.
And that restlessness is this feeling
and this sense that maybe there is something more.
And people who have a comfortable life
they also have a communication pattern.
They also say something on a recurring basis
that you can tell they’re in a comfortable life.
Because what ends up happening is one day
someone says to you, “So how’s everything going?”
And even though you have all the reason in the world
to say, “Life is amazing.”
You find yourself and hear yourself starting saying
when people ask how your life is going
you say, “Well, it’s fine.”
And the “It’s fine” is the tell of the comfortable life.
It’s the tell that there must be something more.
There most be another quality, another kind of life
and that reveals to us that there is this other thing
called the charged life.
And the charged life has a different quality
and feel to it as well.
That there’s heightened levels
of first and foremost, energy there.
People are more passionate when they’re living
the charged life
and because they are more passionate
they feel more of the charge.
It’s not a one time spark.
It’s not once in a while I feel good.
It’s an enduring state of passion
and happiness and satisfaction.
But it’s an enduring state that is triggered
not by comfort
but rather by challenge.
That when we challenge ourselves to go just a little beyond
our current competencies
our knowledge, skills, and abilities
when we’re willing to push ourselves
just a little bit further
that’s when we start to feel a charge.
Because so much of what we know by neuroscience
and what actually charges our brains
of what actually enlivens us in our brains
and what we can see by oxygenation, blood flow
to specific parts of our brain
to the hormonal releases, we can measure back of our brain
from whether it’s dopamine, vasopressin
oxytocin, serotonin, these things often happen
because we’re heightening engaged
with something that’s challenging us
just a little beyond our current level.
Like Mihály Csíkszentmihályi talks about it in psychology
as this concept of flow.
Of doing something where we’re so engaged with it
and you’re so engaged with it
because it’s just a little bit harder than usual.
So you’re not quite comfortable
you’re just a little bit out of comfort zone.
Not totally out of comfort zone and completely overwhelmed
but appropriately challenged to stretch yourself.
And the qualities that the charged life basically has
are there’s a heightened and sustained level of energy
and engagement but also enthusiasm.
And that’s the magic.
You know, if you want to have a fully charged life
you have to start looking forward to things again.
You have to get excited about tomorrow again.
You have to see your life developing again.
You have to set yourself on a path
where you’re step-by-step progressing every single day
so you know tomorrow’s going to be better
that it was today.
That you know tomorrow, you’re going to become more
of who you know you can become.
That you know tomorrow, by your simple choices
by your simple sets of disciplines and habits
that you’re going to evolve
into your highest self.
And that is the path of the charged life.
This constant engagement with the best within us
of pushing ourselves
but with that purpose and that progress
of hoping to become our highest selves.
And when you live in that place
and you sense that every single day
that’s the magic, that’s what life should feel like.
That’s what I think we all deserve
and maybe we ought to start aiming
and challenging ourselves just a little bit more
to get there.
– My take is the best way to leave your comfort zone
is to recognize that you’re playing inside it.
I think this is the biggest challenge
of leaving your comfort zone.
Is we’re so used to playing inside our comfort zone
that we don’t want to step outside it.
We don’t even have the awareness
that we’re playing small.
I had this T-shirt that I like to wear
I haven’t worn it a while on the channel
but maybe we can find an old video
where there’s this thing of one circle that says
“Your comfort zone.”
And there’s another circle outside of it that says
“Where the magic happens.”
So you want to stop playing here
and you want to play out here where the magic happens.
And I think having the awareness to understand
that you are playing small right now
is super, super, super, super, super duper important.
Because what happens is we like to play safe.
We like to be comfortable, we like to stay in the world
that we know of, it’s comfortable.
It’s warm, we’ve done it before.
It’s easy to stay there.
You don’t want to go out into the unknown
into the scary, into the cold
into the who knows what’s going to happen
into the risky zone.
And so, that’s a lot of fear out there.
That’s a lot of fear living way out here.
And what really happens is we find practical reasons
to stay inside our box.
We find practical reasons.
Like, oh well we don’t have the money to go out there.
Or I didn’t have the education to go out there.
Or like, you know I don’t have the time
to go out and do that thing.
I’m not really interested in doing that.
We find these reasons and we convince ourselves
that these reasons are true.
And really all they are, are mechanisms
to keep you inside your safe box
inside your comfort zone.
Where that happens so subconsciously
and the trick comes to understanding
that all of those reasons aren’t really true.
It’s just fear.
It’s not that you’re not interested in it.
It’s not that you don’t have the time to do it.
You’re just afraid.
You’re afraid it’s not going to work.
You’re afraid you’re going to lose money.
You’re afraid of embarrassing yourself.
You’re afraid of the un, you’re afraid.
And once you recognize that it’s fear
that’s holding you back
instead of a logical, practical reason.
Having that awareness
when you’ve figured that out
then you can more easily make the switch
thinking outside your comfort zone.
But as long as you’ve convinced yourself
that it’s a smart decision to stay where you are
then guess what?
You’re going to stay where you are
and you’re never going to leave your comfort zone.
So having the awareness is the most important part.
And once you have the awareness
then it’s having the courage to push through the fear
to achieve your goals
and step outside your comfort zone.
Thank you guys so much for watching.
I made this video because Syed Wajahat asked me to.
So if there’s a topic you’d like me to cover
in the next edition of Believe Life
please leave it down in the comments below
and I’ll see what I can do.
I’d also love to know your thoughts on this video.
What was your favorite clip?
What is going to inspire you to leave your comfort zone?
Do you have any thoughts, suggestions, tips
that you’d like to add from your own experience as well.
Please leave it down in the comments below.
I’m excited to see what you have to say.
Finally, I want to give a quick shout-out to Julio Velez.
Julio, thank you so much for picking up
a copy of my book, Your One Word
and making that fine Youtube video on it as well.
I really, really, really appreciate the support
and I’m glad you enjoyed the book.
So thank you guys again for watching.
I believe in you.
I hope you continue to believe in yourself
and whatever your one word is.
Much love, have an amazing day
and I’ll see you soon.
”
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