so I’m currently a senior here at Illinois Wesleyan and I’m a very proud
Illinois Wesleyan and I’m a very proud
Illinois Wesleyan and I’m a very proud latina first-generation college student
latina first-generation college student
latina first-generation college student which means I’m one of the first people
which means I’m one of the first people
which means I’m one of the first people in my family to go to college however I
in my family to go to college however I
in my family to go to college however I am the first person in my family to
am the first person in my family to
am the first person in my family to study abroad I took this picture
study abroad I took this picture
study abroad I took this picture actually on a plane while I was on a 12
actually on a plane while I was on a 12
actually on a plane while I was on a 12 hour plane ride to st. Petersburg Russia
hour plane ride to st. Petersburg Russia
hour plane ride to st. Petersburg Russia so if this was my first time leaving the
so if this was my first time leaving the
so if this was my first time leaving the country entirely by myself it was the
country entirely by myself it was the
country entirely by myself it was the first time I’d be leaving my family for
first time I’d be leaving my family for
first time I’d be leaving my family for more than two weeks and I didn’t realize
more than two weeks and I didn’t realize
more than two weeks and I didn’t realize it at the time but it would be the first
it at the time but it would be the first
it at the time but it would be the first time that I really would challenge
time that I really would challenge
time that I really would challenge myself by putting myself in an
myself by putting myself in an
myself by putting myself in an environment that I was not familiar with
environment that I was not familiar with
environment that I was not familiar with as well as in an environment barely
as well as in an environment barely
as well as in an environment barely understood the language see as an
understood the language see as an
understood the language see as an International Studies major in Russian
International Studies major in Russian
International Studies major in Russian minor it was a requirement that I
minor it was a requirement that I
minor it was a requirement that I studied abroad so I knew I would at some
studied abroad so I knew I would at some
studied abroad so I knew I would at some point I just didn’t know when or where
point I just didn’t know when or where
point I just didn’t know when or where yet but then the Russian minor came
yet but then the Russian minor came
yet but then the Russian minor came along and I said okay stuff here we go
along and I said okay stuff here we go
along and I said okay stuff here we go so I had taken three semesters of
so I had taken three semesters of
so I had taken three semesters of Russian language while I was here before
Russian language while I was here before
Russian language while I was here before I left so I thought I was totally good
I left so I thought I was totally good
I left so I thought I was totally good like I knew Russian you know and then I
like I knew Russian you know and then I
like I knew Russian you know and then I got there and then I had a host family
got there and then I had a host family
got there and then I had a host family that spoke no English and I realized
that spoke no English and I realized
that spoke no English and I realized that I only knew survival skill Russian
that I only knew survival skill Russian
that I only knew survival skill Russian so I could tell you hello my name is
so I could tell you hello my name is
so I could tell you hello my name is where’s the toilet all those great
where’s the toilet all those great
where’s the toilet all those great things but then once I got beyond that I
things but then once I got beyond that I
things but then once I got beyond that I had no clue especially because it was
had no clue especially because it was
had no clue especially because it was rapid-fire Russian that Russian speak so
rapid-fire Russian that Russian speak so
rapid-fire Russian that Russian speak so it was an incredible incredible study
it was an incredible incredible study
it was an incredible incredible study abroad opportunity that I was able to go
abroad opportunity that I was able to go
abroad opportunity that I was able to go on and the four months by way way too
on and the four months by way way too
on and the four months by way way too quickly so under in December December
quickly so under in December December
quickly so under in December December 18th to be exact I was on that 12 hour
18th to be exact I was on that 12 hour
18th to be exact I was on that 12 hour plane ride back home to the United
plane ride back home to the United
plane ride back home to the United States and I’m sure everyone on that
States and I’m sure everyone on that
States and I’m sure everyone on that plane was already looking forward to
plane was already looking forward to
plane was already looking forward to getting back to the u.s. getting back to
getting back to the u.s. getting back to
getting back to the u.s. getting back to their jobs going back to school but I
their jobs going back to school but I
their jobs going back to school but I was just trying to figure out how I
was just trying to figure out how I
was just trying to figure out how I could go back to st. Petersburg because
could go back to st. Petersburg because
could go back to st. Petersburg because I loved it there even though we were
I loved it there even though we were
I loved it there even though we were only a couple of hours out on that plane
only a couple of hours out on that plane
only a couple of hours out on that plane ride I already missed st. Petersburg
ride I already missed st. Petersburg
ride I already missed st. Petersburg I missed the city I missed the metro I
I missed the city I missed the metro I
I missed the city I missed the metro I missed the lights
missed the lights
missed the lights I missed the buses I missed the language
I missed the buses I missed the language
I missed the buses I missed the language that was sometimes easy to understand
that was sometimes easy to understand
that was sometimes easy to understand and sometimes really hard to understand
and sometimes really hard to understand
and sometimes really hard to understand and then I realized that out of
and then I realized that out of
and then I realized that out of everything the the thing that I missed
everything the the thing that I missed
everything the the thing that I missed the most was getting lost and I got lost
the most was getting lost and I got lost
the most was getting lost and I got lost a lot because Russian uses a Cyrillic
a lot because Russian uses a Cyrillic
a lot because Russian uses a Cyrillic alphabet and some of their metro
alphabet and some of their metro
alphabet and some of their metro stations and some of their bus stops
stations and some of their bus stops
stations and some of their bus stops look exactly the same
look exactly the same
look exactly the same in my opinion and so I would get on the
in my opinion and so I would get on the
in my opinion and so I would get on the bus or I get on the metro trying to go
bus or I get on the metro trying to go
bus or I get on the metro trying to go somewhere and I’d end up going in the
somewhere and I’d end up going in the
somewhere and I’d end up going in the exact opposite direction and I would end
exact opposite direction and I would end
exact opposite direction and I would end up 20 minutes out of the way and
up 20 minutes out of the way and
up 20 minutes out of the way and definitely not at the destination I was
definitely not at the destination I was
definitely not at the destination I was trying to reach but it was those moments
trying to reach but it was those moments
trying to reach but it was those moments of getting lost in the city and finding
of getting lost in the city and finding
of getting lost in the city and finding myself in a new part of town and
myself in a new part of town and
myself in a new part of town and exploring and meeting new people seeing
exploring and meeting new people seeing
exploring and meeting new people seeing new things that really made that
new things that really made that
new things that really made that experience worth it I remember one of
experience worth it I remember one of
experience worth it I remember one of the times that my friends and I were on
the times that my friends and I were on
the times that my friends and I were on a mission to go find a donkey Nietzsche
a mission to go find a donkey Nietzsche
a mission to go find a donkey Nietzsche which translates into book house or
which translates into book house or
which translates into book house or house of books I felt like that and we
house of books I felt like that and we
house of books I felt like that and we didn’t have an exact address for it we
didn’t have an exact address for it we
didn’t have an exact address for it we were just kind of told about it and
were just kind of told about it and
were just kind of told about it and we’re like that’d be cool to go check
we’re like that’d be cool to go check
we’re like that’d be cool to go check out so we hopped on the metro and got
out so we hopped on the metro and got
out so we hopped on the metro and got off at the metro stop that they told us
off at the metro stop that they told us
off at the metro stop that they told us to get off on and we just started
to get off on and we just started
to get off on and we just started exploring we just started walking down
exploring we just started walking down
exploring we just started walking down the street making random turns and
the street making random turns and
the street making random turns and eventually we were like okay we don’t
eventually we were like okay we don’t
eventually we were like okay we don’t see the dome Kenichi so we decided to go
see the dome Kenichi so we decided to go
see the dome Kenichi so we decided to go inside a Russian grocery store and we
inside a Russian grocery store and we
inside a Russian grocery store and we asked the store keepers if they knew
asked the store keepers if they knew
asked the store keepers if they knew where the dome genuki was and
where the dome genuki was and
where the dome genuki was and unfortunately they said that I had
unfortunately they said that I had
unfortunately they said that I had already been destroyed or it no longer
already been destroyed or it no longer
already been destroyed or it no longer existed so we were a little upset
existed so we were a little upset
existed so we were a little upset because we were literally looking
because we were literally looking
because we were literally looking forward to it but we were like okay
forward to it but we were like okay
forward to it but we were like okay that’s fine we’re just gonna keep
that’s fine we’re just gonna keep
that’s fine we’re just gonna keep exploring then so we left and we just
exploring then so we left and we just
exploring then so we left and we just took some more turns kept walking I saw
took some more turns kept walking I saw
took some more turns kept walking I saw a lot of really and then when we were
a lot of really and then when we were
a lot of really and then when we were near the bank of the neva river we saw
near the bank of the neva river we saw
near the bank of the neva river we saw this big building maybe three or four
this big building maybe three or four
this big building maybe three or four storeys tall and there was a lot of
storeys tall and there was a lot of
storeys tall and there was a lot of people coming in and out of it and above
people coming in and out of it and above
people coming in and out of it and above the building if there was a sign that
the building if there was a sign that
the building if there was a sign that said dome cool duty which translates
said dome cool duty which translates
said dome cool duty which translates into house of culture and we’re like
into house of culture and we’re like
into house of culture and we’re like okay this sounds cool let’s go check
okay this sounds cool let’s go check
okay this sounds cool let’s go check this out and it was the most incredible
this out and it was the most incredible
this out and it was the most incredible place in my opinion it was awesome
place in my opinion it was awesome
place in my opinion it was awesome and it quickly became one of my favorite
and it quickly became one of my favorite
and it quickly became one of my favorite places in saint-petersburg because it
places in saint-petersburg because it
places in saint-petersburg because it was a giant indoor flea market basically
was a giant indoor flea market basically
was a giant indoor flea market basically and there was so many Russian people
and there was so many Russian people
and there was so many Russian people they’re selling their handmade crafts
they’re selling their handmade crafts
they’re selling their handmade crafts and scarves and chess sets and literally
and scarves and chess sets and literally
and scarves and chess sets and literally everything you can imagine and it was
everything you can imagine and it was
everything you can imagine and it was also a great opportunity to practice a
also a great opportunity to practice a
also a great opportunity to practice a Russian and since I went so often I got
Russian and since I went so often I got
Russian and since I went so often I got to know some of the people and I was
to know some of the people and I was
to know some of the people and I was able to talk to them and when I ever I
able to talk to them and when I ever I
able to talk to them and when I ever I met new people I would talk to them
met new people I would talk to them
met new people I would talk to them new Russian skills that I was slowly but
new Russian skills that I was slowly but
new Russian skills that I was slowly but surely learning and they actually
surely learning and they actually
surely learning and they actually thought that I was Russian they thought
thought that I was Russian they thought
thought that I was Russian they thought I was from like Kazakhstan or something
I was from like Kazakhstan or something
I was from like Kazakhstan or something and then I got past the Russian that I
and then I got past the Russian that I
and then I got past the Russian that I knew and they’re like oh you’re not from
knew and they’re like oh you’re not from
knew and they’re like oh you’re not from here and I said yes
here and I said yes
here and I said yes you’re right but I’m trying and that was
you’re right but I’m trying and that was
you’re right but I’m trying and that was the most important part so these were
the most important part so these were
the most important part so these were the things that I was remembering when I
the things that I was remembering when I
the things that I was remembering when I was on that 12-hour plane ride home so I
was on that 12-hour plane ride home so I
was on that 12-hour plane ride home so I was thinking about everything that I was
was thinking about everything that I was
was thinking about everything that I was leaving behind because I was four short
leaving behind because I was four short
leaving behind because I was four short months saint-peter’s heard see ears
months saint-peter’s heard see ears
months saint-peter’s heard see ears birth can be home to me but I was also
birth can be home to me but I was also
birth can be home to me but I was also thinking ahead because the only reason I
thinking ahead because the only reason I
thinking ahead because the only reason I was able to study abroad was because of
was able to study abroad was because of
was able to study abroad was because of some really great for scholarships that
some really great for scholarships that
some really great for scholarships that I was able to get if it hadn’t been for
I was able to get if it hadn’t been for
I was able to get if it hadn’t been for that I wouldn’t have been able to fund
that I wouldn’t have been able to fund
that I wouldn’t have been able to fund my trip the results of one of those
my trip the results of one of those
my trip the results of one of those scholarships required me to do a
scholarships required me to do a
scholarships required me to do a follow-on service project and most
follow-on service project and most
follow-on service project and most people do travel blogs or photo essays
people do travel blogs or photo essays
people do travel blogs or photo essays or something like that I just wanted to
or something like that I just wanted to
or something like that I just wanted to do something different I didn’t know
do something different I didn’t know
do something different I didn’t know what though when I was brainstorming
what though when I was brainstorming
what though when I was brainstorming about what I wanted to do I remember
about what I wanted to do I remember
about what I wanted to do I remember having a conversation with my younger
having a conversation with my younger
having a conversation with my younger brother who at the time was a senior in
brother who at the time was a senior in
brother who at the time was a senior in high school and he was it was graduation
high school and he was it was graduation
high school and he was it was graduation season season he was about to graduate
season season he was about to graduate
season season he was about to graduate and he was telling me about his fellow
and he was telling me about his fellow
and he was telling me about his fellow peers who were who had like a very
peers who were who had like a very
peers who were who had like a very dejected outlook on college life they
dejected outlook on college life they
dejected outlook on college life they hadn’t even started applying yet because
hadn’t even started applying yet because
hadn’t even started applying yet because they didn’t think they were good enough
they didn’t think they were good enough
they didn’t think they were good enough they didn’t think that they’d be able to
they didn’t think that they’d be able to
they didn’t think that they’d be able to make it but mostly it was because of
make it but mostly it was because of
make it but mostly it was because of limited financial means and that really
limited financial means and that really
limited financial means and that really struck me because as a first-generation
struck me because as a first-generation
struck me because as a first-generation college student from a low-income
college student from a low-income
college student from a low-income background at my alma mater I knew
background at my alma mater I knew
background at my alma mater I knew exactly what those students were going
exactly what those students were going
exactly what those students were going through I was able to relate to them on
through I was able to relate to them on
through I was able to relate to them on so many different levels and I realized
so many different levels and I realized
so many different levels and I realized that this was something that I’m so
that this was something that I’m so
that this was something that I’m so passionate about I wanted to make this
passionate about I wanted to make this
passionate about I wanted to make this my project and so when I finally got
my project and so when I finally got
my project and so when I finally got back from my study abroad trip I emailed
back from my study abroad trip I emailed
back from my study abroad trip I emailed my incredible high school counselor Miss
my incredible high school counselor Miss
my incredible high school counselor Miss hack and told her about the plan and
hack and told her about the plan and
hack and told her about the plan and asked her if it was okay if I came and
asked her if it was okay if I came and
asked her if it was okay if I came and did a couple of presentations and she
did a couple of presentations and she
did a couple of presentations and she was great and she reached out to a
was great and she reached out to a
was great and she reached out to a couple of our old teachers and they were
couple of our old teachers and they were
couple of our old teachers and they were very enthusiastic they were very
very enthusiastic they were very
very enthusiastic they were very supportive of my project and they
supportive of my project and they
supportive of my project and they invited me to do seven hour-long
invited me to do seven hour-long
invited me to do seven hour-long presentations in seven different classes
presentations in seven different classes
presentations in seven different classes over the time over the time period of
over the time over the time period of
over the time over the time period of two days so that was fun and I was
two days so that was fun and I was
two days so that was fun and I was really excited because I was like yes my
really excited because I was like yes my
really excited because I was like yes my projects taking off it’s gonna be great
projects taking off it’s gonna be great
projects taking off it’s gonna be great but then I realized I probably should
but then I realized I probably should
but then I realized I probably should have something to show to the kids I
have something to show to the kids I
have something to show to the kids I should probably start putting together
should probably start putting together
should probably start putting together this presentation and so I did I started
this presentation and so I did I started
this presentation and so I did I started going through a Facebook and Instagram
going through a Facebook and Instagram
going through a Facebook and Instagram and snapchat and every other photo media
and snapchat and every other photo media
and snapchat and every other photo media outlet that I had and I started pulling
outlet that I had and I started pulling
outlet that I had and I started pulling pictures out of like the past seven
pictures out of like the past seven
pictures out of like the past seven years of my life and when I was looking
years of my life and when I was looking
years of my life and when I was looking through all of those pictures I was
through all of those pictures I was
through all of those pictures I was recalling all of the memories that were
recalling all of the memories that were
recalling all of the memories that were attached to them and I remember
attached to them and I remember
attached to them and I remember realizing wow like I got to do that
realizing wow like I got to do that
realizing wow like I got to do that that’s so cool like and I was able to do
that’s so cool like and I was able to do
that’s so cool like and I was able to do this but then I realized that in all of
this but then I realized that in all of
this but then I realized that in all of those different moments there were
those different moments there were
those different moments there were moments where I felt lost to where I
moments where I felt lost to where I
moments where I felt lost to where I felt insecure emotionally or physically
felt insecure emotionally or physically
felt insecure emotionally or physically or spiritually or mentally but in
or spiritually or mentally but in
or spiritually or mentally but in particular it reminded me of a time when
particular it reminded me of a time when
particular it reminded me of a time when I was in eighth grade and I was going
I was in eighth grade and I was going
I was in eighth grade and I was going somewhere with my mom I have no clue
somewhere with my mom I have no clue
somewhere with my mom I have no clue where we were going but we’re going
where we were going but we’re going
where we were going but we’re going somewhere and we were lost I knew we
somewhere and we were lost I knew we
somewhere and we were lost I knew we were lost she knew we were lost
were lost she knew we were lost
were lost she knew we were lost she didn’t care I care and I was in
she didn’t care I care and I was in
she didn’t care I care and I was in eighth grade so this was before I had a
eighth grade so this was before I had a
eighth grade so this was before I had a phone and I remember feeling really
phone and I remember feeling really
phone and I remember feeling really frustrated because I could just really
frustrated because I could just really
frustrated because I could just really easily Google this and we could get
easily Google this and we could get
easily Google this and we could get there so much faster and I told her a
there so much faster and I told her a
there so much faster and I told her a Mac we’re lost can I please use your
Mac we’re lost can I please use your
Mac we’re lost can I please use your phone so I can look up the directions
phone so I can look up the directions
phone so I can look up the directions and she was just very calm very peaceful
and she was just very calm very peaceful
and she was just very calm very peaceful telling me no no don’t worry about it
telling me no no don’t worry about it
telling me no no don’t worry about it we’ll be fine we’ll get there but it was
we’ll be fine we’ll get there but it was
we’ll be fine we’ll get there but it was going on and I was just like mom please
going on and I was just like mom please
going on and I was just like mom please and then I remember at one of the
and then I remember at one of the
and then I remember at one of the stoplights she turned around and she
stoplights she turned around and she
stoplights she turned around and she looked at me and very calmly said soloq
looked at me and very calmly said soloq
looked at me and very calmly said soloq beardian looked at thank cuentas
beardian looked at thank cuentas
beardian looked at thank cuentas which translates into only by getting
which translates into only by getting
which translates into only by getting lost do you find yourself and me being
lost do you find yourself and me being
lost do you find yourself and me being in that moment being a teenager I was
in that moment being a teenager I was
in that moment being a teenager I was like yeah yeah whatever you say mommy
like yeah yeah whatever you say mommy
like yeah yeah whatever you say mommy and she just calmly kept driving drove
and she just calmly kept driving drove
and she just calmly kept driving drove around in a couple more circles and
around in a couple more circles and
around in a couple more circles and eventually we made it to where we needed
eventually we made it to where we needed
eventually we made it to where we needed to go so that moment is when it’s a
to go so that moment is when it’s a
to go so that moment is when it’s a moment that came to mind when I was
moment that came to mind when I was
moment that came to mind when I was looking through all those pictures and I
looking through all those pictures and I
looking through all those pictures and I started attaching that moment to
started attaching that moment to
started attaching that moment to pictures like this one where I looked
pictures like this one where I looked
pictures like this one where I looked like I’m happy but this was actually
like I’m happy but this was actually
like I’m happy but this was actually taken during the first week here at
taken during the first week here at
taken during the first week here at Wesleyan and I was smiling at minor
Wesleyan and I was smiling at minor
Wesleyan and I was smiling at minor Meyers cuz I thought he was super cool
Meyers cuz I thought he was super cool
Meyers cuz I thought he was super cool that there was a statue but I remember
that there was a statue but I remember
that there was a statue but I remember feeling very insecure and very lost
feeling very insecure and very lost
feeling very insecure and very lost because I didn’t have a lot of support
because I didn’t have a lot of support
because I didn’t have a lot of support and a lot of guidance as a
and a lot of guidance as a
and a lot of guidance as a first-generation student I didn’t have a
first-generation student I didn’t have a
first-generation student I didn’t have a lot of help filling out the paperwork
lot of help filling out the paperwork
lot of help filling out the paperwork and the loans in the financial aid and
and the loans in the financial aid and
and the loans in the financial aid and all of those other great things because
all of those other great things because
all of those other great things because my mom didn’t know about it
my mom didn’t know about it
my mom didn’t know about it my older and a brother and I had to
my older and a brother and I had to
my older and a brother and I had to struggle through that to get
struggle through that to get
struggle through that to get also I was physically lost cuz you can
also I was physically lost cuz you can
also I was physically lost cuz you can still see the little campus map in my
still see the little campus map in my
still see the little campus map in my purse it’s not a big campus but I still
purse it’s not a big campus but I still
purse it’s not a big campus but I still managed to get lost quite a number of
managed to get lost quite a number of
managed to get lost quite a number of times but all of those moments that I
times but all of those moments that I
times but all of those moments that I got lost in my family was always present
got lost in my family was always present
got lost in my family was always present they were my support so that’s my
they were my support so that’s my
they were my support so that’s my beautiful mother on the left and my two
beautiful mother on the left and my two
beautiful mother on the left and my two younger brothers Richard and Alex Alex’s
younger brothers Richard and Alex Alex’s
younger brothers Richard and Alex Alex’s in the graduation cap and that’s my
in the graduation cap and that’s my
in the graduation cap and that’s my older brother Eric so that’s the wise
older brother Eric so that’s the wise
older brother Eric so that’s the wise advice my mom gave me the solo pair they
advice my mom gave me the solo pair they
advice my mom gave me the solo pair they know to think when truss and I realized
know to think when truss and I realized
know to think when truss and I realized that looking through all of those
that looking through all of those
that looking through all of those pictures that she would tell me the same
pictures that she would tell me the same
pictures that she would tell me the same thing and random moments that had
thing and random moments that had
thing and random moments that had absolutely nothing to do with getting
absolutely nothing to do with getting
absolutely nothing to do with getting physically lost so I realized either she
physically lost so I realized either she
physically lost so I realized either she didn’t understand what she was saying or
didn’t understand what she was saying or
didn’t understand what she was saying or I didn’t understand what she was say it
I didn’t understand what she was say it
I didn’t understand what she was say it was me but she was right in looking at
was me but she was right in looking at
was me but she was right in looking at all at all of those pictures putting
all at all of those pictures putting
all at all of those pictures putting together that slideshow thinking about
together that slideshow thinking about
together that slideshow thinking about all of those things that I have been
all of those things that I have been
all of those things that I have been able to do but there were there were so
able to do but there were there were so
able to do but there were there were so many periods of uncertainty I realized
many periods of uncertainty I realized
many periods of uncertainty I realized that she was the one who was right I
that she was the one who was right I
that she was the one who was right I didn’t understand that only by getting
didn’t understand that only by getting
didn’t understand that only by getting lost through actually really find out
lost through actually really find out
lost through actually really find out about yourself it doesn’t necessarily
about yourself it doesn’t necessarily
about yourself it doesn’t necessarily mean that your entire future is
mean that your entire future is
mean that your entire future is enlightened it doesn’t mean that you
enlightened it doesn’t mean that you
enlightened it doesn’t mean that you know everything about yourself but those
know everything about yourself but those
know everything about yourself but those periods of getting lost helped you find
periods of getting lost helped you find
periods of getting lost helped you find out a lot about yourself whether you are
out a lot about yourself whether you are
out a lot about yourself whether you are independent enough to go into a whole
independent enough to go into a whole
independent enough to go into a whole new the country and learn a new language
new the country and learn a new language
new the country and learn a new language and try to survive for four months
and try to survive for four months
and try to survive for four months whether you’re responsible enough to
whether you’re responsible enough to
whether you’re responsible enough to take on tasks whether you are committed
take on tasks whether you are committed
take on tasks whether you are committed enough to take charge on a brand new
enough to take charge on a brand new
enough to take charge on a brand new project there are so many different
project there are so many different
project there are so many different things that you learn about yourself
things that you learn about yourself
things that you learn about yourself when you do get lost this for example is
when you do get lost this for example is
when you do get lost this for example is one of the metro stations that I found
one of the metro stations that I found
one of the metro stations that I found when I got lost again in st. Petersburg
when I got lost again in st. Petersburg
when I got lost again in st. Petersburg I didn’t mean to go there but I got
I didn’t mean to go there but I got
I didn’t mean to go there but I got there and it put me about an hour out of
there and it put me about an hour out of
there and it put me about an hour out of the way so how to go back home in the
the way so how to go back home in the
the way so how to go back home in the opposite direction but this picture this
opposite direction but this picture this
opposite direction but this picture this Mont know the feeling and the emotion
Mont know the feeling and the emotion
Mont know the feeling and the emotion connected to this memory reminded me
connected to this memory reminded me
connected to this memory reminded me that there was so much that I was able
that there was so much that I was able
that there was so much that I was able to find out about myself when I got lost
to find out about myself when I got lost
to find out about myself when I got lost in st. Petersburg I realized that when I
in st. Petersburg I realized that when I
in st. Petersburg I realized that when I get lost I guess I don’t buy it I don’t
get lost I guess I don’t buy it I don’t
get lost I guess I don’t buy it I don’t panic I just look for a solution and
panic I just look for a solution and
panic I just look for a solution and keep finding a different way to figure
keep finding a different way to figure
keep finding a different way to figure things out but it’s more importantly it
things out but it’s more importantly it
things out but it’s more importantly it helped me realize that breakthrough
helped me realize that breakthrough
helped me realize that breakthrough moments are not just giant breakthrough
moments are not just giant breakthrough
moments are not just giant breakthrough moments but rather they’re comprised of
moments but rather they’re comprised of
moments but rather they’re comprised of smaller yet still significant
smaller yet still significant
smaller yet still significant breakthrough moments that lead you and
breakthrough moments that lead you and
breakthrough moments that lead you and prepare you for
prepare you for
prepare you for larger breakthrough moments in high
larger breakthrough moments in high
larger breakthrough moments in high school for me that was putting myself
school for me that was putting myself
school for me that was putting myself out of my comfort zone and joining
out of my comfort zone and joining
out of my comfort zone and joining activities and finding out what I was
activities and finding out what I was
activities and finding out what I was good at and not so good at but also
good at and not so good at but also
good at and not so good at but also finding out that I love languages and I
finding out that I love languages and I
finding out that I love languages and I love helping people and I love meeting
love helping people and I love meeting
love helping people and I love meeting new people and trying new things when I
new people and trying new things when I
new people and trying new things when I was a senior it meant going through the
was a senior it meant going through the
was a senior it meant going through the whole insecurity being unsure of whether
whole insecurity being unsure of whether
whole insecurity being unsure of whether I was even ready for college whether it
I was even ready for college whether it
I was even ready for college whether it was good enough for college whether that
was good enough for college whether that
was good enough for college whether that was something for me or not when I was a
was something for me or not when I was a
was something for me or not when I was a freshman it meant having to put up with
freshman it meant having to put up with
freshman it meant having to put up with college realizing that there’s a whole
college realizing that there’s a whole
college realizing that there’s a whole nother level required of you when you
nother level required of you when you
nother level required of you when you make it to college that people have
make it to college that people have
make it to college that people have higher expectations that there are
higher expectations that there are
higher expectations that there are things I need to be done and deadlines
things I need to be done and deadlines
things I need to be done and deadlines are deadlines and there’s just so many
are deadlines and there’s just so many
are deadlines and there’s just so many different moments of getting lost
different moments of getting lost
different moments of getting lost physically mentally emotionally
physically mentally emotionally
physically mentally emotionally spiritually go through all of those
spiritually go through all of those
spiritually go through all of those things those smaller moments prepare you
things those smaller moments prepare you
things those smaller moments prepare you for the lights but I also realized that
for the lights but I also realized that
for the lights but I also realized that those lost moments mean that you’re
those lost moments mean that you’re
those lost moments mean that you’re going to feel insecure and I did feel
going to feel insecure and I did feel
going to feel insecure and I did feel insecure a lot of times so my advice to
insecure a lot of times so my advice to
insecure a lot of times so my advice to you is be unsure and do it anyways
you is be unsure and do it anyways
you is be unsure and do it anyways because chances are if you take on a new
because chances are if you take on a new
because chances are if you take on a new job if you move to a new place if you
job if you move to a new place if you
job if you move to a new place if you join a new organization you’re gonna
join a new organization you’re gonna
join a new organization you’re gonna feel lost at some point anyways and
feel lost at some point anyways and
feel lost at some point anyways and you’re gonna have to figure out a
you’re gonna have to figure out a
you’re gonna have to figure out a solution anyways you’re gonna have to
solution anyways you’re gonna have to
solution anyways you’re gonna have to figure out a way to get over it through
figure out a way to get over it through
figure out a way to get over it through it around it whatever it takes to get
it around it whatever it takes to get
it around it whatever it takes to get you to where you need to go so be unsure
you to where you need to go so be unsure
you to where you need to go so be unsure and do it anyways but more importantly I
and do it anyways but more importantly I
and do it anyways but more importantly I realized that those smaller moments in
realized that those smaller moments in
realized that those smaller moments in my life led to those bigger
my life led to those bigger
my life led to those bigger breakthroughs in 2014 that meant
breakthroughs in 2014 that meant
breakthroughs in 2014 that meant battling all the things that I needed to
battling all the things that I needed to
battling all the things that I needed to battle – to get to graduation in
battle – to get to graduation in
battle – to get to graduation in highschool and now hopefully May of 2018
highschool and now hopefully May of 2018
highschool and now hopefully May of 2018 I will get to graduation 2018
I will get to graduation 2018
I will get to graduation 2018 so I would encourage you all to
so I would encourage you all to
so I would encourage you all to recognize that in the moments where you
recognize that in the moments where you
recognize that in the moments where you feel lost and secure not sure take
feel lost and secure not sure take
feel lost and secure not sure take advantage of my mother’s wise advice
advantage of my mother’s wise advice
advantage of my mother’s wise advice that I didn’t listen to you at the time
that I didn’t listen to you at the time
that I didn’t listen to you at the time but now finally understand that solo
but now finally understand that solo
but now finally understand that solo perdiendo to think cuentas only by
perdiendo to think cuentas only by
perdiendo to think cuentas only by getting lost do you find yourself thank
getting lost do you find yourself thank
getting lost do you find yourself thank you
you
you [Applause]
”
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